What the World Needs Now - Humble Bridge-Builders, Part 2

Are you a relational bridge builder or breaker? Is your heart right now filled with anger and bitterness or love and concern? How do Christians live like Christians in the season of division and rancor in our country?

That's today. Stay with me. Thanks for listening to this Edition of Living on the Edge with Chip England.

Living on the Edge is an international teaching and discipleship ministry focused on helping Christians live like Christians. Well, in just a minute Chip will pick up where he left off in our series What the World Needs Now with part two of his talk Humble Bridge Builders. Now last time we learned how anger and resentment can pester like poison in our hearts. So in this program Chip will continue addressing those dangerous emotions and stress why it's imperative to mend any broken relationships we may have. But before he gets to that, let me encourage you to try using our message notes while you listen. This free resource includes Chip's outline, the scripture references and more. To download them, go to the broadcasts tab at livingontheedge.org, tap listeners, tap fill in notes. Well, if you have a Bible handy Chip will be in the book of Matthew.

So go there now as he begins his message with a pretty powerful analogy. Let's listen in. I've got a rock here somewhere in my pocket. Wonder what I did with it. This rock represents people I've murdered, any grudges that I have, any bitterness and resentment in my heart. And in a little while we're going to give you a chance to really name the rock just between you and God. Hurt feelings, ex boss, ex mate, current situation. And we're going to ask you to come and only if you have done it to drop the rock and say I'm going to release that person of what I hope happens to them.

The vengeance, the payback, the emotion. And where necessary, are you ready? It gets harder. So some of you may have this rock all next week because you're thinking I'm not ready to do that yet. Then put it in your purse, put it in your pocket every day and keep carrying around this rock. And if we were better friends I would bring you an extra rock every day.

Every day that you didn't drop it I'd just put another one in your pants, another one in your purse. Because that's what it's doing to you. Because some of you words have come out of your mouth and of course they deserved it. Okay? We'll get to that. Of course they deserved it. And it was 90% their fault.

It's the same with me. I know that. But God is going to call you and call me to go not only ask for forgiveness if necessary but make it right whenever possible as far as it depends on you. And what you'll recognize is that you are as much of a murderer and I'm as much of a murderer as David or Paul or Moses. And most of them have done it with our lips and we've done it with our heart and there is only one hope. And it's the hope that we can come and that the body of Christ, His death on the cross paid for our sin and His blood was shed for us and He has given us mercy and He has forgiven us. And we've got what we don't deserve. And the only reason we're going to drop this rock is not because they deserve it, not because they're a good person, not because it's going to be better mental health, but we're going to drop this rock because I can't receive mercy and take what God has given to me that I don't deserve and He's not going to pass judgment because of Jesus so neither am I. Now it doesn't mean you hang out with Him.

It doesn't mean that everything's going to be wonderful. And when you have a clear sense that you have forgiven that person, then I'm going to ask you to turn your attention and begin to thank God. If Jesus, if every one of the commands has this level of probing underneath of it and the Spirit of God went all the way through this room, all the way around and we were to seeing what's going on inside, I will tell you the cross will become very precious. And you'll be so deeply grateful that you will walk out of this room forgiven and cleansed and anything you've ever said, anything you've ever thought, any assassination with your lips, be clean. Well, Jesus now applies this to His audience and He applies it because we're not done.

He gives us two very quick parables. Matthew chapter 12, Jesus has just talked with the Pharisees who externally are squeaky clean. And He says to them in verse 33, either make the tree good and its fruit good or make the tree bad and the fruit bad, for the tree is known by its fruit. Now, it's not your intentions.

It's not how you sing. He says, your life, your outward evidence, you brew to vipers, how can you speak good when you are evil? Then here's this point, for out of the abundance of your heart, the mouth speaks. The good person out of the good treasure brings forth what is good.

The evil person out of evil treasure brings forth what is evil. I tell you on the day of judgment, people will give an account of every careless word that they speak, every slander, every gossip, every little post on Facebook, every passing on, every click, every side conversation, every screaming out of a child that doesn't understand what they did wrong, every harboring resentment in your heart and you say, well, it's her turn to apologize. I'm tired of apologizing.

Every time we make up, it's always me. I'm not going there anymore. And so you just keep drifting. For by your words, you will be justified and by your words, you'll be condemned. I don't know about you, that scares me to death as it should. Well, Lord Jesus, this is hard for us to hear.

I'm sure it was hard for them to hear help. Therefore, the parable of priorities, two applications, very short parables. Therefore, if you're offering your gift at the altar and there remember your brother has something against you, leave your gift in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother, then come and offer your gift. Underline the line, if you're offering your gift at the altar.

Times have changed very unfortunately. If you were a follower of Yahweh, you didn't think that offering gifts was sort of, maybe I will, maybe I won't, depending how I feel. You would understand that he owns everything and the first 10th of the produce, the first 10th of the cow, the goat, the first child has to be paid for and you're gonna bring your offering and if you sin, you're gonna bring a sin offering and this is the holiest moment, this offering is going to represent an act of mercy of God's covering and that blood is going to remind you that in the future, God's going to bring a Messiah who, so I mean, there's no more holy moment.

Giving's required. God owns everything, I bring the very first and the very best. Few things to a Jew would be more important. The word is required, prayer is required, giving is required and now he, his, if you could hear this through the ears of his first century listeners, they would be thinking, this is one of the most sacred holy moments, this is how you get right with God. This is how you tell him that there's no idols.

My first and best is to you. This is a sin offering. This is how my sins are gonna be held off and he goes, there's something more important. If there, you remember not that, look at it, look at the text. This doesn't say, if you're there and you remember you have something against your brother, you're mad, you're angry, she did that to me, he did that to me, that's not what it says, what's it say?

Look at it. If you're there and you remember your brother has something against you. What if you have a tiff with someone and you know, if it's like me, it's 98% their fault and 2% my fault but things aren't right and I'm kidding, okay, if you're new, I'm just messing with you a little. I usually say it's 51% their fault and 49% mine.

I'm teasing still. What I want you to get is the principle and the principle is very clear and very powerful. Right relationships trump religious requirements every time. Right relationships trump religious requirements every time. Don't go and read your Bible, don't go and pray, don't put something in the offering. If you have a relationship with someone, he goes, this is the priority. Nothing's more important because the kingdom of God is about love and if it's really about love, if there's a relationship with your mate, with one of your kids, with your friends, with your ex, with someone at work, with someone in your small group with a co-worker, make it right because that will be the good works that they'll see and glorify your Father who's in heaven and if they're a brother or a sister in Christ, Jesus said, I died for everyone. You have to come together. The barriers are defensiveness, blaming, excuses, pride, oh that's not fair or a self-righteous fulfillment of this. Oh yes, I was going to do something and you know I remembered that that time we had an argument and in tone of voice it was 99% your fault but since I'm so spiritual I want to ask you to forgive me for my 1% please and I hope you feel like a real heel because you are a scumbag and but I'm following the Bible.

No, no, no, no. This is even in your heart you feel like it's 10% you, 90% them, oh God. If it was 1% apart from your holiness I have no hope. I humble myself before you.

I completely own my 10% and since there's large levels of denial it's probably at least 40 but it doesn't matter. I ask you to forgive me and I go and say you know that altercation we had and that conversation that keeps coming around, how I handled that was wrong. Will you forgive me?

I'm sorry and you don't bring anything up about anybody else or them. You're listening to Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. We'll return you to Chip's message in just a minute but let me quickly share with you God has called us to do incredible ministry work all around the world and when you partner with us financially you're a part of what we do.

So if you'd like to join us go to livingontheedge.org. We appreciate whatever God leads you to give. Well with that here's Chip. Parable number two, it's the parable of urgency. Jesus has settled the matters quickly. Your adversary who's taking you to court do it while you still with him on the way or he'll hand you over to the judge and the judge may hand you over to the officer and you'll be thrown into prison.

I tell you the truth, you will not get out until you've paid the last penny. Now he's giving it them in their cultural mindset but circle a few words because guess who the adversary is? Jesus is saying the adversary is God. He went through, you've heard it said, if you just don't physically kill someone, yeah there's the Old Testament law. I say to you if you have these emotions, hate, anger, bitterness, if you say these things or if there's contempt, I tell you it starts with this court, the Supreme Court, and then hell.

And so he brings them back. Notice your adversary quickly, underline quickly. Notice the words. He'll hand you over to the judge, circle judge, and the judge, circle judge, will hand you over to the officer, you'll be thrown into prison.

I mean, how many words? You get it? This is a crisis. This is not, you know, I probably ought to make that relationship right. You know a lot of bad things have come out of my heart. Yeah, I'm angry but everyone's angry and, you know, if they lived in my situation, if they grew up in my, you know, I came from a dysfunctional family and, you know, in light of her addictions or his addictions or my unreasonable boss, I think God understands. Memo! He doesn't understand. Murder is murder. You're the salt of the earth.

You're the light of the earth. Make it right and make it right now. This isn't one of those services where the conversation in the car going home isn't, well, did you like the message? Of course not.

Was it interesting? Yeah, for not good reasons. This is about you meeting God in the next few minutes and you experiencing a level of forgiveness and cleansing and mercy and love and with all your heart purposing, you're going to give that away. The principle here is clear and powerful. Delayed obedience will result in dire consequences. There are some of you that have physical issues, relational issues, financial issues and health issues that are related to unresolved conflict and anger and murder and words. It's judgment of God.

I can't tell you who, when, where, why. What I can tell you is these kind of patterns, God has his favor on some people and God has his love on everyone but his love sometimes when there's patterns like this, I call it the velvet vice of discipline and he's trying to get your attention and I'll tell you what, you can keep dissing him and that vice will get tighter and tighter and tighter and tighter until you come to a breaking point and say, oh God, if you're a genuine child of God, he'll take you to the mat because what you're doing is killing you and destroying others. I found a few quotes from a little book that I picked up recently. Bitterness always feels justified. Bitterness creates the illusion of control and power. When we embrace bitterness, we reject grace and here's the part with no matter who this person is, remember the good and the good will grow. Isn't it interesting when we have a problem with a person, especially a family member, especially with one of our kids or a maid or an in-law or a co-worker, you know, like there was at one time, they were a pretty good person. Remember that?

I mean, it was way back when before they, and what we do is then we take the incident or we take the thing and we put a little box in it and bam, that's who they are now forever and ever and ever. They were never kind, they were never helpful, they never loved you. You know that's not true and it feeds your soul.

It's like poison. If you turn to the back page, I did not want to leave you to some vague devices to, I wonder what I should do. I want to talk to you and then give you the time to learn to take some humble steps to building a bridge. I'd like you to answer these questions quietly. Do you have anger or bitterness or resentment toward anyone, past or present? And if you'll just be quiet before God, he'll bring someone to mind if you do.

Have you murdered anyone in your heart or with your lips? Is there anger, bitterness, resentment? When someone's name comes up or someone talks about someone, do you have a visceral reaction that's negative and will you confess this sin right now and receive God's full forgiveness? I'll give you time to really process this, but he's faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness, but you have to come clean. You have to admit, you have to agree, yes, this is me. Can you think of anyone that might feel angry or resentful towards you for any reason?

Will you commit to make that relationship right as far as it depends on you? And maybe you can't, but there's usually something you can do as far as it depends on you. And then as you go through this process at your own pace and have the Holy Spirit give a seal in your heart of peace that yes, you've dealt with this now and then stop and thank God for his love and kindness and remember the great words of David who sinned greatly and murdered, O Lord, you are so good, so ready to forgive, so full of unfailing love to all those who ask for your help. Before we go any further today, I want to pause and I want to give you some time to think and to reflect on this message.

I know it's difficult. I want you to really think about who is that person or persons that there's anger, there's resentment, there's bitterness. Be willing right now in this moment to say, Lord, if there's anyone and the Holy Spirit is very faithful to bring things to our mind because his desire is that we make them right first in our own heart and then we make them right with that person.

So let me ask you to be really, really honest. Think about where there's conflict and maybe right now the perspective is it's all their fault and it's what they did and yet Jesus said, when you come before the Father and you're ready to present your offering, if you're there and remember that your brother has something against you, pause, go your way, first be reconciled to your brother, then come back and give your offering to the Lord. And so it's not whether you're mad at them or whether they're mad at you. Relationships are so important.

Connection from the heart is so important. Forgiving from the heart without bitterness or resentment or anger is so important that God says right relationships matter far more than being right. And whether it was 90% their fault and 10% your fault, be the one that takes the step. And I do understand as far as it depends on you.

And let me just give a quick disclaimer. There are some situations where there was abuse in the past or physical violence or sexual abuse. Yes, you forgive them. It may be totally unwise to try and meet with that person. But about 95% of all the issues are smaller issues that's happened in churches and in families and friends and relationships in a small group or at work.

That's who I'm talking to. And so right now, Holy Father, by the power of your Holy Spirit, will you give us the grace to stop pointing fingers, stop nursing our hurt? Would you give us the grace to come before you and own our part, whether it be large or small, receive your forgiveness and Lord then extend that mercy to those who don't deserve it in the same way that we don't deserve it. Would you help us to set a time to not let this go?

Even as far as it depends on us, to seek to restore the relationship. Lord, for your honor and for your glory. In Jesus' name. Amen. That's a great word, Chip.

Thanks. While you're listening to Living on the Edge and the message you just heard today, Humble Bridge Builders is from our series, What the World Needs Now. Turmoil, division, political corruption, prejudice, these are just a few of the serious issues we're dealing with in today's society. But did you know Jesus's disciples faced even worse problems? In this six-part series, Chip highlights the wisdom Jesus passed on to his followers over 2,000 years ago and how his words still guide us today. Don't miss the ways to build healthy relationships, handle injustice, and live God-honoring lives. Let me encourage you to stick around for each message.

But if you do miss any part, catch up through the Chip Ingram app. Chip's still with me in studio here to share one last thing with all of you. Thanks so much, Dave. I want to pause just for a minute, and if you're a financial partner with Living on the Edge, I just want you to hear a message that we received from a lady named Kelly who listens every single day. She said, Thanks so much for your ministry and daily podcast.

I listen every day. I'm a recovering addict of many things. I grew up in a Christian family and was saved at the age of 17. Shortly after that, because of peer pressure in school, I started doing drugs. I now have a few years of sobriety, and God saved my life, and He has totally removed the physical urge to use drugs and alcohol and cigarettes. I've now joined an awesome church that has small groups, and Christ has blessed me in recovery meetings. Anyway, thanks so much for sharing your life with others. You've made a positive difference in my life. Kelly is one of hundreds, actually thousands of emails that we get at Living on the Edge. I just call them life change.

Spirit of God took the Word of God, and it might have been on a podcast, could have been on the radio, could have been in a small group, could have even been a CD or a book. But God intervenes with their life, and something happens that changes the course of their life. And I just want to pause and thank you. You know, some of you write a check every month. Some of you have it taken out of your account every month. Some of you, like once a quarter, twice a year, you give to Living on the Edge. I want to remind you what it actually does. It's not about giving money. It's about extending ministry and changing lives. So thank you, thank you, thank you. And if by chance you're listening and you're thinking, you know, I've never given to Living on the Edge, but I'd like to get in on that, we'll give you a very simple way of how you can join the team and really make a difference.

Thanks, Chip. Well, if you were inspired by this story, pray about becoming a financial partner with Living on the Edge. Your support helps us reach more people with sound Bible teaching as we encourage Christians everywhere to live like Christians. To give a gift, go to livingontheedge.org or call 888-333-6003.

That's 888-333-6003 or go to livingontheedge.org. At Listeners Tap Donate. As we close, you know an easy way to share Chip's messages is with the Chip Ingram map. With just a couple of taps, any message you choose is on its way to your friend, someone in your family, or social media to help others benefit and find encouragement from the truth of Scripture. And don't forget to include a note about how it made a difference in your life. Well, thanks for listening to this Edition of Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. I'm Dave Druey and I hope you'll join us again next time.