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This Is The Day

Hope for the Caregiver / Peter Rosenberger
The Truth Network Radio
October 18, 2021 3:30 am

This Is The Day

Hope for the Caregiver / Peter Rosenberger

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October 18, 2021 3:30 am

A simple song with a powerful message to family caregivers. Plus, callers from the show and a powerful "D" block monologue.

If you find this program meaningful, please share it and consider supporting this work at:

www.hopeforthecaregiver.com/giving

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Live on American Family Radio, this is Peter Rosenberger. This is Hope for the Caregiver. This is the show for you as a family caregiver. More than 65 million people right now in this country are currently serving as a family caregiver.

Maybe that's you. What is a family caregiver? Somebody who takes care of a vulnerable loved one with a chronic impairment of some kind. Whether they're dealing with Alzheimer's, they're dealing with autism, maybe addiction. Maybe they have some type of trauma that has happened to them that has caused a chronic impairment, chronic pain, mental illness. There's all kinds of chronic impairments and there's always a caregiver. Some of them do it up close and personal every day, 24-7, and some of them are doing it from a distance. Some of them are partnering with other family members, but there's always a caregiver.

And maybe that's you. And if so, you're in the right place. This is the show for family caregivers. Now, if you're not a caregiver, you're going to get something out of the show. If you're a pastor, if you're a counselor, if you even know a caregiver, which we all do, you're going to get something out of this. But the show is specifically for the family caregiver.

And I speak fluent caregiver here on this show. I've been doing it now for 35 plus years through a medical nightmare. And along the way, I've learned a few things. I think all of it the hard way.

I don't think I've ever learned anything the easy way, but I think I have learned it the hard way. And those insights that we talk about on this show, sustain us through the craziness. And what I have found in my experience is that this thing can go out of control very quick. Actually, it's always out of control, but it can really start coming at us very quickly.

And sometimes it's just relentless. And in that moment, when you are struggling to find solid ground, what do you do? How do you anchor yourself? How do you reorient your thinking so that you're not swept away by this? This is the crux of the whole program.

It's the crux of everything I do with my books and everything is how do we anchor ourselves to stand firm when it gets really, really gnarly? And a lot of people talk about caregiving. I see that a lot across the media and so forth. There are a lot of people talking about caregiving. I don't do that on this show.

I mean, we'll swerve into it if you have a specific question about something. But what this show is about is the caregiver. And that's why I ask every audience member, every caller to the show, how are you feeling? It's not that we want to start talking about our feelings and that's everything subject to our feelings. It's just now we have a real conversation about how you're doing because caregivers struggle to speak in first person singular. We struggle to speak in our own voice for whatever reason.

And there are a lot of them. But the point is for you to start speaking in your voice, me to start speaking in my voice so that we can then start on the path to healthiness. Okay, I feel miserable today, fearful today, resentful today, whatever. It doesn't matter.

There's no wrong answer. Now we have an honest conversation and we want to get out of the God talk where we're just saying, well, I'm just blessed, but I hate my mama. I've actually had that call to the show. You know, we don't want to talk in the God talk. We want to be honest about what's going on with us. So then we can go and look at it in the light of scripture and say, okay, what does God have to say about this? And if you go into Psalms particularly, you'll see an enormous passages of scripture, enormous passages of scripture that are talking about the author, whether it's David or some of the others struggling with very, very serious problems and they're being candid about it. If you go back and look at Jeremiah, you see the same thing. And virtually anyone who has ever walked with God that is spotlighted in scripture struggles on some level and they get pretty gut level honest about it. And then we see what God's response to that is.

So that's the point of the show. And if you want to be a part of the show, and if you're struggling with something today, whatever is going on in your life, 888-589-8840, 888-589-8840. We don't give answers because I don't think there are answers that we can process here for a lot of the things that we deal with on this earth.

But what we do is we point it back to, okay, what does God have to say about it? And that brings us to our song for today. And I'll go over to the caregiver keyboard very quickly. This is almost embarrassingly easy, but there's a reason I'm doing it. So Embarrassingly easy.

Yes. But you know what, when we're in the middle of the craziness in our life as caregivers, we need embarrassingly easy. And if you don't think you do give it some time, you'll realize that that's exactly the case. We cannot on our own fight this. We cannot white knuckle this.

We cannot somehow squint our eyes real tight. And, and we're just going to just muscle our way through it. We can't do it. You may do it for a day or two, maybe do it for a week or two. I met this for three and a half decades.

So let me go ahead and tell you, you can't do it. It's only a matter of time till you crash and burn. And you've got to hang on to something that is much stronger than you through this. And that's why I play these songs. That's why I have these, these, these hymns, these courses and everything else. Because sometimes in the middle of all the noise and all the confusion that's going on in our life, these familiar phrases and melodies and so forth stand apart and just kind of burst through the confusion and give us clarity for the moment. And it doesn't necessarily make us feel better, but that's not the goal was to feel better.

You understand? The goal is not to feel better. My wife has had now 81 surgeries that I can count. She is recovering from this surgery. She hurts all the time.

She's not going to feel better. And I'm certainly not going to feel better about watching her do it, but that's not the goal. The goal is to be better, to be stronger, to be wiser, to be calmer, to be more focused on what God is doing in this. As we traveled through this journey that he sees fit to allow us to go through.

We don't have to like it. And I'm certainly not a consultant, you know, to the almighty here. God doesn't, you know, start out each day and say, Hey Peter, what do you, what do you think about this?

It's my father. My father's a long time minister. He says, God's got this problem.

He thinks he's God. That's the journey that we have as caregivers is understanding, okay, we're not God in this. And I used to be, when I started out on this journey, I was so demanding. I wanted to know why, why was God doing this? And then over time that changed and I became comfortable saying, I don't know why. And now as I'm getting a little bit older, I'm thinking, you know, I'm really landing on that place. I can't know why I can't not until I'm with him.

I cannot know why. And I'm learning to make peace with it and be right here in the moment. This is hope for the caregiver.

This is Peter Rosenberg. This is the show for you as a family caregiver. We're glad you're with us. 888-589-8840. 888-589-8840. We'll be right back. Welcome back to Hope for the Caregiver here on American Family Radio.

This is Peter Rosenberg. This is the show for you as a family caregiver. Healthy caregivers make better caregivers. How are you feeling today? How are you doing?

Is your life in his hands? That is Gracie singing from her CD Resilient. Go out to hopeforthecaregiver.com if you want to learn more about her music and how you can get a copy of that CD. 888-589-8840. 888-589-8840. Our song for the day and I'll just play just the chorus of it because I want to get to some of the calls here.

Alright, if you know that song. 888-589-8840. 888-589-8840. Let's go to, this is Mike in Wisconsin. I'm having a hard time logging into this, Mike. Hang on just a second. All this hits a little brain.

There we go. Mike, good morning. How are you feeling?

Good morning. I'm doing alright. I'm a little bit tired. Well, it's a little early in the morning to be tired so obviously you didn't have a great night last night.

Is that an accurate statement? Yeah, that was my own doing, being out late. Alright, well what you got on your mind? How are you feeling? Well, I'm anxious to hear.

I didn't realize I was new to the program. I didn't realize that you've been a caregiver for your life and I've been a caregiver myself from my brother for many years. I watched my dad be a caregiver for him. He struggled with not only mental illness but he's been recovered from alcoholism for better than 25 years and hasn't had any relapses.

He suffered a head trauma where he was assaulted and had brain damage from that. He goes into times where he's in a catatonic state and other times where he's very clear and he believes in Christ and times where he's very clear about what he's doing and other times where he's focused on smoking and it's not easy to communicate with, kind of like a catatonic state. So my dad struggles with that and I'm trying to find ways to help him cope with that. How old is your brother?

It's a good question. He's 64, my dad is 90 and my brother at the age of 27, he had a very difficult experience in the army and then ended up being malnourished, ended up leaving the army at 6 foot tall, 135 pounds and my dad brought him back home and actually saved his life by getting him out of there and bringing him home. And then he reunited with his wife and son and then he struggled because he had trouble with alcoholics and then he became separated from his wife and the son at that age was about 6. Let me ask you this, what's the plan for your brother after your father passes away? Well, that's something we don't, you know, I know we're supposed to have a plan but we don't have a good plan for that. We haven't come up with a good plan for estate planning and all that either. I have a sister that's the youngest of all of us.

There's a difference because she was adopted. There's a difference in age from the oldest to the youngest out of a span of 29 years. Well hang on, before we get too far in the weeds, what's the next action step that you can take to start having a plan because your father is 90. This is unsustainable and it's coming up quick. What's the next action step that you can take in order to develop a plan for your brother? Well, it's taking some of the burden off my dad because he's also a caregiver for his wife who's 90 as well and literally he's a caregiver and a citizen and helping with my sister as well. Well it sounds like your dad at 90 years old is doing, is pulling way more than he's able to do. I mean that's a lot to ask of a 60 year old man, much less a 90 year old man.

So let's go back to this. What's the next step because your father is going to die within a short amount of time reasonably. We don't want him to but he's 90.

Although William Shatner showed that a 90 year old could go into space, most people can't do that. So what needs to happen next for your family to look at these very tough issues? You've got evidently a stepmother who's also infirmed.

You've got a brother and the scenarios continue here. What's the next action step to sit down and have a real conversation about what are we going to do? Well, the sister that's there in the home with him also, she would like to get her own place. We've got my wife who's been a caregiver her whole life in the nursing field. She's kind of a step away from that. She's debating taking her mother in and she's offered and has little help with parents. But that's really, they need more extensive care than that.

They don't really want to go to the nursing home. Do you get along with your sister, Mike? Yes, we get along really good. Can you and your sister and your father sit down over lunch one day and start having this conversation? Do y'all have that kind of relationship? Yeah, he's definitely been pushing for that and that's what we're all doing. I want to share more of him with him.

I grew up going to Christian church and I grew up, you know. Wait a minute, hold on, hold on. We're getting into no more.

Mike, Mike, we're getting into the weeds of the background story. The immediate task at hand is to sit down with your dad and your sister and start drawing, even if you have to do it on a napkin at a waffle house, which I have had many of those kinds of conversations with my dad and I still have some of the napkins. But sitting down and mapping out, okay, what do we need to do? What's the next step?

Let's have a conversation. Let's have a real conversation about all these people that are in our circle that need care. That's our next step. And then that next step may be to call in, you know, professionals. There are people that can help with that sort of thing. Whether it's counselors, social workers, you know, home care teams, you know, the VA, I mean, there's all kinds of things, resources out there, but it starts with you three, it sounds like, sitting down and having a real conversation about this. Can you schedule that conversation in the next several days?

I will schedule that conversation for either today or tomorrow. And I'm glad you brought up because he is a Korean War veteran, so he does go to the VA rather extensively. And that's a good point that they would have help as well.

They're going to have, they're going to have all kinds of people there. There are chaplains in the military. My dad was a chaplain in the military. And there are so many people that can help, but it starts with you guys having a cohesive conversation plan type of event where you can say, okay, here's what our options are.

Because your father at 90, this is a tall order to ask of your father. And so how about scheduling that meeting and would you do me a favor after you schedule that meeting and have that meeting, would you mind calling back and tell me how it went? Well, that's very kind of you to talk to that.

Well, no, I do that for two reasons. I'd like to know personally how it goes with you, but also there are people in the audience right now listening to this that also are in that place where they've got to make a decision to have a conversation. And so, you know, they need to know how, how did this go?

What, what, what, what worked, what didn't work? What are some things that we can incorporate in our life? This is how we do it as caregivers. We come together on, and that's why this show is just to have these conversations that are not very pleasant.

They're not very fun, but it's got to happen. And, and we, we pull together, we learn from each other, okay, well, what did Mike do with his family? You know, what, what, what, what went wrong? What went right?

What's something I can incorporate from his journey. And, and so that's why it's important, but, and it doesn't have to be, you don't have to fix everything at one sitting at one meal. What you do is you start having the conversation and you say, okay, what are our options? And okay, you, you call the VA or you call this person and then let's come back in a week and see, let's pool our resources and see what did we come up with? But, but the clock is ticking. When you have a father that's 90, a stepmother that's in her nineties, a brother that's in his sixties, that's got significant issues.

That's your mother. Okay. Okay. Well, regardless of the, of the specifics that let's, let's stay out of the weeds here, but regardless of the specifics, you've got a lot of people in your orbit who are dealing with significant life issues and the clock is ticking.

So I applaud you on taking the initiative to go ahead and setting that time to talk and, and, you know, go, go to a restaurant you guys like or something and just, just sit down with a notepad and just start looking at it. And then as you do that, also ask God you know, spend time in prayer beforehand and ask God to give you some scriptures that would apply and bring those in because the principles of God will apply to the conversation you have. I promise you that. Okay.

That I promise you, the principles of God will apply, but ask Him to show you in scripture and go in there with a couple of verses to say, okay, here's the wisdom that we believe that we're getting from scripture to make these decisions. And then let me know. And I appreciate you calling on this mic. I really do. This is an important thing. This is happening to families all around the country and you spotlighted an issue that we got to deal with. This is Hope for the Caregiver. This is Peter Rosenberg and this is the show for you as a caregiver. Hey, this is Peter Rosenberg and in my three and a half decades as a caregiver, I have spent my share of nights in a hospital, sleeping in waiting rooms, on fold out cots, chairs, even the floor, sometimes on sofas and a few times in the doghouse, but let's don't talk about that. As caregivers, we have to sleep at uncomfortable places, but we don't have to be miserable. We use pillows for my pillow.com.

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We do it all the time. 10 year warranty guaranteed not to go flat. 60 day money back guarantee made in the USA. As a caregiver, you need rest. So start by going to my pillow.com, type in the promo code caregiver. You get 50% off the four pack, which includes two premium pillows and two go anywhere pillows. You'll also receive a discount on anything else on the website when using your promo code caregiver. That's my pillow.com promo code caregiver. Welcome back to Hope for the Caregiver here on American Family Radio.

This is Peter Rosenberger. This is the show for you as a family caregiver. Healthy caregivers make better caregivers.

And part of being healthy is learning to speak from your own voice and strengthen your own heart in this journey. Very much like, again, you've heard me say it a hundred times on this show, like David did at Ziklag when all of his possessions, all of his family, everything and his men were all carted away. They were out fighting a battle.

They came back and everything's gone by the Amalekites. And David was distraught. All his men were distraught and they picked up stones. They're going to stone him. And David encouraged himself in the Lord. Eventually all the men dropped the stones and then they went and got their stuff and David led them into battle. But he encouraged himself in the Lord in the midst of great hostility. Now, if he can do it then, we can do it now. And that's the point of what we talk about on the show.

But what does that look like? To encourage yourself in the Lord. If you listen to the songs that I play on the bumper music coming back, you put this love in my heart, Keith Green. And I know that I can make it. I know that I can stand no matter what comes in my life.

My life is in your hand. Gracie sings that. All these songs I do. And then these hymns and choruses that I play today. Now I guarantee you, if you know the song, go ahead and call me and tell me why that's important to you.

888-589-8840. But I guarantee you for those who do know the song, that song, and most of you probably do, you're going to spend various points of the day around the day and you're going to remember that tune. And that's how we do it as caregivers. It may sound simple. People may think this is just, this is too elementary.

I don't care. When you've been a caregiver for 35 years, you need simple and elementary. Okay. I don't need complex.

I need simple. And that's why I play these songs because they are ingrained in us and they, they stay with us. Those melodies stay with us.

And then we can, as we deal with whatever comes our way. So I'm going to go to the phone lines here. This is Geneva in Kansas. Good morning, Geneva. How are you feeling? Hey, I'm feeling wonderful.

I woke up to the song. I have my little radio on most of the night and I woke up to this is a day the Lord has made and it brought back so many wonderful memories. I just came through taking care of my husband for about seven years with Alzheimer's. I'm 94 years old and God enabled me. Bless him. You gave good advice to the young man just to speak the word, pray and be in the word. And it brought me through. My precious husband went peacefully to be with the Lord just about a year ago. Not quite.

And I'm still with Geneva Island. Yes. When is, when is the anniversary of his passing?

At November the 4th next month. What are you going to do? Oh, I will celebrate. When he did go, my daughter managed to be with me. She helped me in many, many ways. It was so wonderful.

And when he passed. Do you have a plan for that day? Do you have a plan for that day of what you're going to do? Just to rejoice and go out with my daughter probably go out and have a meal and just, just fellowship.

It's just good to talk things over and so much good came from it. It was a time of, I didn't know if I'd make Mike to make it, but, uh, I would just, he was precious and he was a prayer warrior. He went, how long were you all married? 71 years. Oh my goodness. Geneva.

Yes. And it was wonderful. We had, we had some rough times and I was a caretaker for many of my relatives, my mother in law, my dad, my mother, you know, and so on and so forth. But God brought me through everything and you gave such good advice to the young man. My, uh, I can do all the things through Christ who gives me the strength.

I would have to get my husband up at time and he was able to walk over the last. He was a fighter and we would quote scripture and he would just melt. And I would quote Proverbs three, five and six, trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding, acknowledge him in all your ways and he will direct your past. And he'd always say, Oh, I needed to hear that. That would be when he really be gone through it. And he would forget me sometimes, but I could bring him back just telling about the time, how we met, how we got married and the songs that were sung at our wedding.

And, and he would say, Oh, wonderful. Yes. I remember.

And Geneva, let me, on that note, Geneva, let me ask you a question. Did you find, did you find that that he was able to hang on to music, um, to almost the end? Yes.

Yes. He loved singing. Our church came out on Christmas. Now that was, uh, he was deep into all timers and they invite them in. They were singing this Carol on the porch and they came in and when they started singing, he stood up and he was singing every song that they sang and the tears and the love and, Oh, it was so beautiful. And, uh, you know, isn't that remarkable though that these songs stay with you and they, they, uh, so many of them are able to punch through even Alzheimer's. That's the power of music. And it's, it's, it's, it never ceases to amaze me.

I remember interviewing, um, Glen Campbell's wife, um, Kim and his music was like one of the last things to go with his Alzheimer's and they lived, um, they just lived down the road from us in Nashville about, I could almost throw a rock at their house and when we lived in Nashville and, and that was one of the most remarkable things is that Glen's music was, was still with him, even though he would forget where he was sometimes. And so that's why the, how it's, how important, uh, why I stress the importance of these songs because they will permeate even Alzheimer's. And, uh, and that's, that's something to be said. Uh, you knew this song, this is the day that the Lord has made.

We will rejoice and be glad in it. Do you know by any chance, this is a tough question though, but do you know the Psalm that it comes from? I do when I'm reading the songs and jumps out at me, I can't say it right now.

No. Um, and at my age, I'm finding a little bit of producer. That's all right. At 94 Geneva, I'm not going to, I'm not going to hold that against you because I don't, I can't do that myself sometimes, but it's, uh, um, I think it's, uh, I think it's always good to, to realize how, how much scripture is, uh, stays in these songs and that's what's, I think that's what gives them life and breathes life into them.

So I just appreciate this. And I, let me tell you real quick, uh, when we retired and it was from a very busy life, a hard life, but a good life in, in, um, uh, a mission field. We went through America for 22 years.

We did 159 projects. We got out in our eighties working for Christian organizations throughout the land. And it was such a blessing because I'd always desired and he knows your heart's desire and to see the United States because we never could do that with vacation. We'd rarely got a vacation and he put us in, just fell into place so beautifully that it enabled us. And we worked those 22 years singing all the old hymn songs of every kind and coming together in worship and praise.

And we would sing, this is a day the Lord has made when we'd come together with the other missionaries. But God works so beautifully in your life. If you just trust him, walk with him to practice his presence. He's so precious. He never failed you. Sometimes we wait and say, well, God, are you still there?

Yes, he's still there. And he'll let me know. Oh, he broke me through. I never thought I could go through that.

I felt like a wet noodle most of the time. And I know just have an inkling of what you've gone through Peter. And uh, well, that's very gracious of you. I'm, I'm sitting here listening to you and you know, you 71 years of marriage and what you two accomplished and the life that you live.

And on November 4th, I will make a note to remember you as well. And I'm asking the audience as well to, to, for this amazing life that you two live together. What was your husband's name? Vernon. What is your name? Vernon.

Vernon and Geneva. Thank you as the God and the Lord. Sounds very much like that. I can see that in it. And I love the love, the love that you two had and still have, and it echoes through all eternity. And what a great picture of, of, of what Christ does for the church is what you and Vernon had together. And that's extraordinary. Oh, it was special. Yes, it was special. And we always said the 23rd Psalm together.

When I would start, he would come right in no matter what condition he was in. He would pray it with me. And it was a special time.

In fact, my daughter and I rejoiced when we got up at 5.30. I saw him take his last breath and I held his hand and we were rejoicing that he went to be with the Lord, free of all that, because it was hard. It was hard, but he brought us through, you know, the words and get the words in you because they come forth when needed the most. God is so faithful. God is so faithful. He never fails you. He never fails you. I'm just getting used to the quietness now.

It was constant busyness, you know, for all those years. And I'm just getting used to the quiet. And it's been a blessing just to read and to, and I look over, I feel he's still here with me. I know he isn't, but I feel that. I feel his presence. It seems like I look at his chair and it just seems like … Well, according to the book of Hebrews, he's in that great cloud of witnesses that are cheering you on. I believe that, yes. So well, that's what the text says.

I'm going to go with the text. So he's in that great cloud of witnesses that are cheering you on. And we are as well, Geneva, and you have blessed us this morning with this tremendous story in a world filled with all the craziness you and Vernon modeled such a beautiful story. And thank you so much for sharing that. We're going to go on here, but I want you to know how much I appreciated you calling November 4th. Those of you make a note on it and lift up Geneva in prayer on November 4th as she commemorates the year of her husband's passing and that God would just particularly surround her with the knowledge that we're all cheering her on. And Vernon is cheering all of us on as well. So thank you for that, Geneva.

I really do appreciate that. This is Peter Rosenberg. This is Hope for the Caregiver. This is the show for you as a family caregiver.

888-589-8840. This is the day that the Lord has made. We will rejoice. We're not going to spend time regretting the past and we're not going to fear the future. We're going to live right here today. And that's why I did the song today.

We'll talk about that when we come back from the break. Don't go away. There's more.

888-589-8840. Have you ever struggled to trust God when lousy things happen to you? I'm Gracie Rosenberger and in 1983 I experienced a horrific car accident leading to 80 surgeries and both legs amputated.

I questioned why God allowed something so brutal to happen to me, but over time my questions changed and I discovered courage to trust God. That understanding, along with an appreciation for quality prosthetic limbs, led me to establish Standing with Hope. For more than a dozen years we've been working with the government of Ghana and West Africa, equipping and training local workers to build and maintain quality prosthetic limbs for their own people. On a regular basis we purchase and ship equipment and supplies.

And with the help of inmates in a Tennessee prison, we also recycle parts from donated limbs. All of this is to point others to Christ, the source of my hope and strength. Please visit standingwithhope.com to learn more and participate in lifting others up. That's standingwithhope.com. I'm Gracie Rosenberger and I am standing with hope. Welcome back to Hope for the Caregiver.

This is Peter Rosenberg. This is the show for you as a family caregiver. This is that song by Keith.

I just love it. I've always loved that song and for those of you who don't know who Keith Green was, do yourself a favor and go out and Google. I know they got the Jesus music documentary out right now and he's mentioned a little bit. I haven't seen it yet, but I heard he's mentioned a little bit in it, but he was such a powerful voice.

But that song is one of the reasons I do the show. Do you see? Do you see? And caregivers aren't seen. I know this from experience. I can't tell you how many people have asked me how my wife is doing. I can't count them, but I can count the ones who ask about me.

And I'm 35 years into this. How about you? And so when I realized that this invisible army of people who are caring for chronically impaired loved ones, some of them dealing with just horrendous circumstances, who's going to recognize these individuals? Who's going to speak to them?

Who's going to communicate with them? How are they going to understand? It would take somebody that speaks fluent caregiver because we have our own language. It's difficult to talk to a caregiver sometimes if you don't know the journey, if you don't know the language, if you don't know the scenario. People don't know what to say. And so caregivers just plodded along, struggled along, limped along, often in isolation.

I've said this many times. Caregivers can feel isolated in a crowded room and we can feel isolated on a crowded pew. And so when I envisioned this show many years ago, I was determined I was going to speak directly to caregivers.

And it's not that I don't want to speak to other people with it, but it's just, this is who I see. This is who I am. And so when I do these songs for you and everything that I do on the show, it is a reflection of my own journey. I had to get to the point where I was doing our song for today. This is the day.

We will rejoice and be glad in it. It's one thing to sing that at a church with people on drums and guitars and everything else. It's another thing to sing that as your wife goes into surgery for the 81st time. It's another thing to sing that as you're holding the hand of somebody who is slipping away. It's another thing to sing that if you have a child with autism who is just having meltdown after meltdown.

I was talking with friends of ours yesterday, they have a special need son with very dire circumstances. And it's relentless. He's 20 something years old and it's relentless. And I'm not here to try to bolster you up and say, come on, suck it up and let's go.

No, no, no. We got to start from the inside out. We got to go all the way down to the core of who we are and deal with that fear and deal with that heartache and deal with that sorrow and speak life to it. It's way down inside us.

And so people come up and they throw surfacy things at us, you know, and it doesn't stick because it can't because it's not penetrating all the way down to the core. And that's why I do the show. That's why I write books.

That's why I write a column. That's why I do all the things that I do is because I know from personal experience what it's like to have people throw a basket full of platitudes at me and none of it stick. And I also know what it's like when people came along and they spoke life to me and they spoke right down to the very core of who I am and helped me walk through this and get stronger and healthier. And so when Keith Green sings that song, did you see, do you say, yeah, I do. I do see it. And I see it around because I am that. And somebody saw me.

Several somebody saw me and I want you to know that somebody sees you. All I'm doing is what Paul talked about in Corinthians, offer the same comfort that I myself had received from the God of all comfort. And hopefully you will do the same as well to others that you see. But we're not going to come and grab people.

I tell this to my Pentecostal and charismatic friends. Don't go and grab people, start prophesying over them. Just sit with them. Just be with them. They're already just so on edge. You can send them right off the cliff. Just be. I've had people come up, do that to me and they just want to just shout at me the blessings of God.

No, it doesn't work that way. He's very calm. He's very quiet. He's very gentle. And if you look through scripture, you'll see that there's the words like steadfastness, mercy, grace, loving kindness. Don't be afraid.

Be still. These are permeated through all of scripture because he knows that we are fragile, freaked out, messed up people. And if we could just calm ourselves down or allow more importantly him to walk us through calmness.

You heard what Geneva said, that she would read the 23rd Psalm and her husband, even in Alzheimer's, would join in. He leads me besides still waters. He restores my soul. Yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear what? No evil.

For what? Thou art with me. He is with us in this. It doesn't seem that way at times. I know that.

For heaven's sakes, I know that. And there are times when you just hang your head and you're just so weary and you're so beaten down and you're so discouraged. And in those moments he is there.

I promise you he is because I have experienced this more times than I can count. It doesn't necessarily go away. It doesn't change the reality of our journey in the sense of the, okay, these legs don't grow back. Her pain hasn't decreased.

I don't know why that God has not seen fit to alleviate this from her. I really don't. And as I told you in the last block, I am becoming a little bit more comfortable saying I can't know why. I can't. I don't have it in me to process that.

And so I have to make a decision. Am I going to trust? Am I going to trust God in this? And there are people that, like I said, they just throw out platitudes. And you hear this a lot of times from pulpits and everything else. We just trust God.

Just trust God. You know, that sounds really nice when you're not having to schlep through all this stuff that Gracie and I do. That's a good Yiddish word, by the way. I like that word.

With the last name like Rosenberg, I'll throw in a Yiddish word every now and then. That is not an easy thing to say to people. But when you hear people like Geneva who were married 71 years and cared for her husband with Alzheimer's for the last seven years of it.

And when you hear the joy and the vibrancy and the excitement in her voice, that's different. That's something the world does not offer. Don't take my word for it. Look at what the world offers for about five minutes every day on the news or whatever. And you'll see, no, the world doesn't offer that. You can't fake it for 71 years. Okay? You can't.

It's not possible. But what you can do is anchor yourself in these truths so that when you are going through those tough times and when those tough times seem to stretch on beyond the horizon, that you're not swept away. This is the day. This is the day that the Lord has made.

So many of us as caregivers, you see if this applies to you, I know it has to me. We either romanticize or regret the past or we fear or fantasize about the future. And scripture tells us to live here in this moment. This is the day that the Lord has made. And this day may contain very painful things for you.

But scripture doesn't qualify that. It just says, this is the day that the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it. And my hope is, is that this little course that is so familiar to so many of us will stay with you not only today, but throughout the week and beyond when you were faced with very, very difficult things.

I struggle to say this, but I'm going to say it anyway. Anybody else that tells you that, you can raise an eyebrow. I know because I've done it and say, well, that's nice for him to say.

But those of you who listen to this show regularly, and for those of you who don't know, you've learned a little bit today, you know my journey. That would be like Geneva saying to you that you can have an enduring marriage. Well, if somebody says that it's been married for three years, it's no big deal.

But somebody says it's been married for 70 years. You're going to listen. And when a caregiver tells you that you can trust God in these things, that's been doing it for 35 years, hang on to them. Those of us with scars and experience down this road, we have learned a few things. And that he is faithful and this is the day that you can rejoice in it.

Period. This is Peter Roseburger. There's more at HopeForTheCaregiver.com. Some of you know the remarkable story of Peter's wife, Gracie. And recently, Peter talked to Gracie about all the wonderful things that have emerged from her difficult journey. Take a listen. Gracie, when you envisioned doing a prosthetic limb outreach, did you ever think that inmates would help you do that?

Not in a million years. When you go to the facility run by CoreCivic and you see the faces of these inmates that are working on prosthetic limbs that you have helped collect from all over the country that you put out the plea for and they're disassembling, you see all these legs, like what you have, your own prosthetic legs. And arms, too.

And arms. When you see all this, what does that do to you? Makes me cry. Because I see the smiles on their faces and I know what it is to be locked some place where you can't get out without somebody else allowing you to get out.

Of course, being in the hospital so much and so long. These men are so glad that they get to be doing, as one band said, something good finally with my hands. Did you know before you became an amputee that parts of prosthetic limbs could be recycled? No, I had no idea.

I thought of peg leg, I thought of wooden legs, I never thought of titanium and carbon legs and flex feet and sea legs and all that. I never thought about that. As you watch these inmates participate in something like this, knowing that they're helping other people now walk, they're providing the means for these supplies to get over there, what does that do to you just on a heart level? I wish I could explain to the world what I see in there. And I wish that I could be able to go and say, this guy right here, he needs to go to Africa with us. I never not feel that way.

Every time, you know, you always make me have to leave, I don't want to leave them. I feel like I'm at home with them. And I feel like that we have a common bond that I would have never expected that only God could put together. Now that you've had an experience with it, what do you think of the faith-based programs that CoreCivic offers? I think they're just absolutely awesome. And I think every prison out there should have faith-based programs like this because the return rate of the men that are involved in this particular faith-based program and other ones like it, but I know about this one, is just an amazingly low rate compared to those who don't have them. And I think that that says so much.

That doesn't have anything to do with me. It just has something to do with God using somebody broken to help other broken people. If people want to donate a used prosthetic limb, whether from a loved one who passed away or, you know, somebody who outgrew them, you've donated some of your own for them to do. How do they do that? Where do they find them? Oh, please go to standingwithhope.com slash recycle. Standingwithhope.com slash recycle.

Thanks, Gracie. Say what would you do if you were a new Christian and you didn't have a Bible? It's Michael Woolworth, by the way, from Bible League International. And you'd probably say, well, I'd hop in my car. I'd go to a Christian bookstore or have one shipped to me.

What if those weren't options? You'd say, well, I'm new to the faith. I mean, I need to know what it means to grow in the grace and knowledge of Jesus.

You know, you would pray that someone, anyone would bring you a Bible. And that's exactly the way it is for literally millions of Christians around the world. They're part of our spiritual family. They're new to the faith.

They want to know what it means to grow in the grace and knowledge of Jesus. But God has them planning where it's very difficult to access a Bible. And that's why the Truth Network and Bible League have teamed up to send God's word to 3500 Bible-less believers around the globe.

Our campaign is called The World Needs the Word. Five dollar sends a Bible. One hundred dollar sends twenty. Every gift matched. Make your most generous gift by calling 800 YES WORD. 800 Y E S W O R D. 800 YES WORD or give at truthnetwork.com.
Whisper: medium.en / 2023-08-07 19:44:06 / 2023-08-07 20:03:23 / 19

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