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September 18, 2021 9:12 am
Chapter 39 from My Book HOPE FOR THE CAREGIVER is titled,. "They're Going To Fall." This is an excerpt from the audio book.
Following Gracie's recent fall, broken leg, and surgery, I had to remind myself of this. These are heartbreaking events and it's easy to slip into dark places.
I had to go back and read my own book.
Chapter 39 they're going to fall.
Nelson Mandela said for to be free is not merely to cast off one's chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others. Matthew 634. Therefore, don't worry about tomorrow because tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
I love this quote from Clint Eastwood's dirty Harry a man's got to know his limitations. A woman once shared with me that she couldn't get away from her aging father because every time she left something bad happened. He falls each time I leave him with someone else.
She said while tearing up in frustration was something that happens whether you're there or not. I told her you can guarantee your presence will forever prohibit him from falling. If you done your best to provide safeguards and have someone there in the event of a fall or other mishaps. What more can you do as we all struggle with the independence issue. These questions require consideration with your loved one's life improve if you were out of the picture.
Are you able to care for them. When you are emotionally and physically exhausted.
Will they be better off.
Once your husk of a human being.
Looking at those questions seeking and maintaining a healthy level of emotional and even physical independence becomes critical not only for the caregiver but also for the patient as well.
Independence is not abandonment.
It's allowed alive to blossom on its own without encroachment of watch my wife all many times since she began walking on prosthetic limbs decades ago. Each time I try to catch her if I can comfort her when I can't. The fact is, amputees use prosthetic legs are going to fall. She's embarrassed what happens and I'm embarrassed for her.
She hurts and I hurt for our sons her to see their mother fall, but we all recognize that for her to be who she is. She has to get back up and continue trying. That's her journey.
If I buy the force of my will try to keep her in a wheelchair to avoid falling. I would do great harm to her and ultimately to me I would force her to become utterly dependent upon me and rob her of whatever level of independence she could achieve were caregivers not superheroes. We can prevent every disaster solve every problem. This is a metropolis. It's the real world here in the real world. They're going to fall. They will make mistakes, they will get hurt.
No caregiver can eliminate those risk without endangering his or her well-being.
We do the best we can to protect the ones we love. While never forgetting that the best asset for their protection is to have a healthy caregiver