#403 Playing the Melody: Caregivers and The Loss of Identity

Welcome to Hope for the Caregiver.

I am Peter Rosenberger. This is the nation's number one show for you as a family caregiver. For those of you who are caring for a loved one with a chronic impairment, could be Alzheimer's, could be autism, could be addiction, whatever the impairment. There's always a caregiver. How are you feeling?

How are you holding up? We are glad to have you with us. We are live. We're on American Family Radio and the number if you want to call in and be a part of this show is 888-589-8840.

888-589-8840 and we'd love to have you with us. Let's start off with our scripture because I got a particular subject I want to talk about today. Isaiah 49, 15 through 16. I'm not going to wait for you to turn to it.

Can a woman forget her nursing child or lack compassion for the son of her womb? Even if she could forget, I will not forget you. Behold, I have inscribed you on the palms of my hands. Behold, I have inscribed you on the palms of my hand. One translation says engraved. If you look at the scars of Christ, you see a picture of that from the crucifixion of how much God knows who you are.

This is so important for us as caregivers. I want to go back and do a little bit of a review for those of you who are brand new to the show. The show is growing every week and every day.

I want to make sure you understand what the concept of this show is all about. Some years ago, my pastor back in Nashville, we live in Southwest Montana now, but when we lived in Nashville for 30 plus years and he asked me to play the piano as people were coming into the sanctuary. Before church started, it was kind of raucous and noisy and disruptive to an atmosphere of reverence and so forth. He said, would you just sit down and play?

I was happy to do it. I love the old hymns and I play them. I sat down and I started playing. I realized into the hymn I was playing, something was off.

I've got a keyboard here set up. I was playing. Those are great chords, but I realized I wanted to play the melody. I've been so used to hearing Gracie sing. I've been accompanying my wife, Gracie, who's a no kidding singer and I've been so used to hearing her sing that I was playing around her voice that I was hearing in my head, but I wasn't playing the melody. I'd lost the melody and I had to go back and train myself to play the melody. Now, I went back and just with one finger started doing it and that's hard for a pianist to do, by the way, just to play with one finger. My piano professor in music school used to, that was an exercise we had to do, is to take one finger and play the melody as expressively as you possibly could so that you could understand the song better. So when I sat down to play, I really went back and worked at that so that I would play that melody and force myself to do it.

Now, what does that mean to the family caregiver? A lot of us are so used to playing the harmony that we lose our identity. We lose who we are in someone else's story and we lose our melody. We're not playing the melody. We've lost our own voice and that's why when you call into this show, the first question I'm going to ask you is, how are you feeling?

And you'd be amazed how many people struggle with that question that are caregivers and I'm not shaming you for it because that is the point is I want you to wrestle with that question of how you're feeling. What's going on with you? Do you know how important you are? So when I went back and played that same song that you just heard.

So now I'm not only playing something, I'm saying something. Yes, Jesus loves me. You ever felt like you were trying so hard to carry your loved one to Jesus that you couldn't even see the road yourself? You ever felt like that it was all about them and if God would just heal them, if we could just tear up this roof and get this person to Jesus, then everything's going to be okay but you were not a part of the equation? You see, as a family caregiver, that's why I do the show because Jesus loves me.

This I know. Yes, he loves Gracie, my wife. He loves her.

He loves me too. My name is engraved in the palm of his hand and so is yours and this loss of identity cripples caregivers. We don't know how to speak from our own heart. We don't know our melody.

We don't know how to express ourselves in this and this is where it's a very, very dangerous place for us as a caregivers because once we lose our identity, then we're in a position where we don't function as a healthy human being. Is this where you are today? Do you know your name? Do you know he knows your name? Can you speak from your own heart?

Can you speak in first person singular? I hurt. I'm tired. I'm struggling. I'm feeling this way. Whatever comes after, I'm angry.

I'm despairing. Whatever comes after the word I, now we can have a real conversation. This is the point of this show and so when you when you call into the show, whatever's on your mind doesn't matter.

We'll talk about whatever you wanna talk about but let's start off with how you're feeling and it's not that your loved one is not important because they are but so are you. You know it and I can't tell you over the years how many people have asked me about my wife. I mean that number is is too vast for me to to answer. But I can count the ones that have asked about me.

And that's a much smaller number. Is that where you are? Is that where you are struggling? Do you feel like you've just lost yourself in this story of someone else that you're taking care of whether it's your parents or special needs child or whatever?

Do you feel like your identity has just been compromised by this and you don't know your name anymore? You don't even know how to speak from your own heart. You don't know the melody. And what is your melody?

What is what does that sound like? And if you think that it's not worthy of expressing, then you're wrong. And if you get nothing out of what I'm doing on this show, if you get nothing out of what this is all about, then I accept for that one phrase that your voice is important. Your identity, your name, you as an individual are important. And that is the first step towards being a healthy caregiver.

And healthy caregivers make better caregivers. So if you've lost yourself and if you're over there just playing like I was at the beginning of just playing great chords, I mean, yeah, they're great chords, but I wasn't saying anything. I wasn't playing the song. And and sometimes as caregivers, we're playing great chords, great harmony. But without the melody, the message is not there.

The song is not there. How about you? What's your song? 888-589-8840 888-589-8840 If you want to be a part of the show, I'm going to ask you when you call, how are you feeling?

You don't there is no wrong answer if you start with I. Welcome back to Hope for the Caregiver here on American Family Radio. I am Peter Rosenberger and this is the nation's number one show for you as a family caregiver.

How are you feeling? 888-589-8840 888-589-8840. That is Russ Taft of the Imperials singing this song. He didn't say you're forgiven.

Now you have a reason for it. He says, I'm forgiven. And the word I, how important it is. See caregivers suffer from three I's. Okay, just remember that three I's. We we have three I's that we deal with. We become isolated. We lose our independence. And then we lose our identity. Okay, three I's and that's what we're talking about this morning is that identity.

We're just kind of going back and and rehashing that particular subject. Have you lost your identity? Remember when I when I sat down at the church and I played this song and I and I got up there and I was it was really kind of embarrassing cuz I was up there playing in front of people and I didn't realize that I was accompanying Gracie in my head. She was singing but I couldn't you know I nobody else heard Gracie singing. It was just in my head. We're not gonna go into voices in my head but the point is I was playing harmony and there wasn't a singer. I was so used to playing for.

I mean Gracie and I've been I've been accompanying Gracie for 34 years. So, when I when I play, I'm usually thinking about how she's singing it and I had to get up there and play the melody. I had to go back and physically teach myself how to do this on all these hymns that I've known since I was a kid but it's work to speak from your own voice.

By the way, 888 589 8840 888 589 8840. So, so when I get up and play I mean those are great chords but I'm not saying anything and everybody can just marvel at my chords but they're not marveling at the song. There's no melody and you have to go back into one finger.

And it takes time to do that. It takes a lot of work to go back and learn the melody. So, then, when you add the chords to it, Then, you can start adding all these lush chords to it. But it's still about the melody.

So, when you play these chords, when you do these things, make sure you're not overpowering the melody, your voice, who you are as an individual. Go back to our scripture today, Isaiah 49 and it says, 49 16, I have engraved you on the palm of my hands. I've inscribed you on the palm of my hands.

That's how much he knows who you are. And so, and it may sound a little bit weird when you start speaking from your own voice. So, you have to do that in a in a safe environment. I don't I don't recommend working out the melody in front of a church full of a thousand people like I had to do.

So, I really don't recommend that. That's that can be a little challenging but you get the principle. The principle is try speaking from your voice, in your own voice, from your heart.

What's going on with you? And that's when when I do this show, I provide that opportunity for you to do that. A lot of people when they call in, they wanna talk about their loved one or they're mad about, you know, someone since they spend a lot of time with speaking in either the third person singular which is he or she or in first person plural which is we, our, us.

But on this show, it's starts with I and me. Yes, Jesus loves me. This I know for the Bible tells me so. Okay, you know that hymn. So, every time you are tempted to lose yourself in that, go back to that little hymn and I put this on my CD, Songs for the Caregiver. You can download it from any of the streaming to places, you know, iTunes, Spotify, Amazon, whatever and I put this on there.

It's just an instrumental and I got a friend of mine to play the flugelhorn on this and he's a wonderful player and I did, I put that song in there because I wanted caregivers to hang on to the message of that song. Yes, Jesus loves me. I know he loves your loved one. I know he loves my wife. But but do you know that he loves you?

He died for all of us but he died for each of us. He knows your name. Is that important to you? It's important to me. And it's life changing once you understand that's the gospel that he knows you.

That he's interested in you. That you are an extraordinary individual and a lot of caregivers I think tend to unfairly beat themselves up because they see all their failures and I was doing a video conference with a group not too terribly long ago and we live out in Southwest Montana. We're up at 6000 feet up in the Rockies and we're backed up to a national forest. So everywhere we look is a postcard. I mean it's it's extraordinarily beautiful out here. And I I held the phone up the the camera up so they could see behind me. I said I want you to look at something.

And the group looked at it and I showed them the mountains snow covered and you know beautiful trees and forests and so forth they could see behind me. And they were just like wow. But then I said scripture says that all of creation is groaning. Okay it's groaning. Every bit of that. And I said you just saw all this wow but every bit of that is groaning according to scripture.

Every bit of it. But yet you said wow. Because there's such beauty and majesty even in things that are groaning.

And that's just a foretaste of the beauty and majesty we're going to see when when all things are made new. Well now I'm going to say that to you as a caregiver. There is a wow factor to you.

Yes there's groaning and there's brokenness mistakes and all kinds of things. But there's a wow factor to you. Do you say wow when you see you? Well do you? Because he does. And your name is engraved on the palm of his hand. So the journey to being a healthy caregiver does not start with dealing with doctors and insurance companies and all those kinds of things.

The journey to being a healthy caregiver starts with you learning to speak in first person singular. I. Just as I am without one plea.

Just as I am. Not we. Not he. Not she. Not us.

Or all y'all. I. And all you need is need.

That point comes when you say I need. I hurt. I'm tired. I'm angry.

I'm struggling. That's that's the melody. That's what a melody looks like for a caregiver.

It starts with the word I. And translates into your heart just as I am. Jesus loves me this I know. Do you really know that?

Do we know that? And I think as we look around the fear that our country is going through which is I mean I I I'm stunned about you know what our country is the turmoil our country's in and and part of it is this fear that we're driving that's driving all this stuff. But then once you understand who you are in Christ. Once you know that melody.

Then that fear becomes it abates. He's not given us a spirit of fear but of power and of love and of sound mind. And part of that sound mind is understanding who you are. And who you are in him. This this I don't wanna be too ethereal but I I wanna drive this point home and that's why I brought the keyboard out this morning because there's something about just a simple song that helps really drive that point home. Jesus loves me this I know.

For the Bible tells me so. And if you just hang on to that in those moments when you feel like you've lost yourself. You're not gonna get a lot of people asking how are you doing? They don't know what to do that part of the mission I have on this show is to not only provide a vocabulary and a place for family caregivers. But also to provide vocabulary for people who aren't caregivers, for counselors, for pastors, for church leaders, for for lay members, for for the general population of what it looks like to help a caregiver. And somebody said, well, what do you say to a caregiver? And I was doing an interview one time and they said, well, what do you say to a caregiver? How do you know what to say? And I said, why don't you start off with this and say, I see you and I see the magnitude of what you carry and I hurt for you.

Just start with that. Say it very gently to a caregiver that you see them. Because if you ask most caregivers that have been doing this for any length of time, they're gonna they're gonna express that feeling of invisibility. That it's their life at someone else's expense.

Their identity is gone. People wanna know how their loved one is doing. And there's nothing wrong with that. I appreciate the the concern for that. But on this show, in this hour, for this message, I wanna know how you're doing.

I wanna know how you feel. I wanna know how you are hanging in there with this. And again, I had, try to avoid the God talk when when you do that. I had a lady call in.

How you doing? Well, I'm blessed but I just hate my mama. Let let's don't try to put on God talk when we do this.

Let's just be real about it. Okay. 888-589-8840 888-589-8840 and if if you wanna be a part of the show and you know what I may even take a request or two on the piano. If you got an old hymn that you like or something, I may I may play it for you. If that's something you want.

888-589-8840. This is Hope for the Caregiver. I am Peter Rosberg. I'm glad you're with us. And I'd like for you to be a part of becoming a healthier caregiver because healthy caregivers make better caregivers. Don't go away. We'll be right back.

Do you believe that? That's Gracie singing by the way. That's all for her new record, Resilient. You wanna copy that? Go to Hopeforthecaregiver.com. Hopeforthecaregiver.com and you can be a part of what we're doing here on this show and we'll send you a copy of whatever's on your heart to give.

We'll send you a copy of that CD. Gracie's fussing at me. Why haven't you put out there so we can deal with that? Well, it's not the only thing I have to do, Gracie but 888-589-8840 888-589-8840 if you wanna be a part of the show. He'll give you hope for tomorrow, joy for your sorrow.

If you believe that, then you are well on your way. Well on your way to being a healthier caregiver and I'm glad for that. Alright, Mark in Texas. Mark, good morning. How are you feeling? Well, I just woke up so I'm I'm still figuring that out. And you just woke up and you're talking to me just as you woke up. That is not a good thing for you, Mark. I'm sorry for that.

You might wanna get a cup of coffee first. Well, yeah. I'll I'll I'll open up by saying that I'm a musician and some of the analogies that you're using regarding the music has has hit home and I'm I'm a caregiver for my wife now. so I've had to put a lot of that music on hold and the the solo stuff primarily. I play in a band and I also have played solo and what do you what what instrument do you play? I play of course, guitar and I I play bass and I've you know played dobro a little bit of banjo and you know kinda run the game needed at the time. A little bit of banjo goes a long wage.

You know that don't you Mark? I do you know you know what the definition of a gentleman is definition of a gentleman is a man who knows how to play the banjo but won't. No, I'm just kidding. I'm just no letters from the banjo fans. I'm just kidding.

It's just a joke. Okay. Alright. Well, tell me tell me what's besides feeling groggy this morning. Tell me what's going on with you.

Well, you know I'm taking care of my wife. She's has Alzheimer's and is getting the point where you know you're talking about doing you know the different functions where you're you're an accompanist and and and you also have to play the solo and it's it's like I feel that the my function in in that regard is is ever changing. You know because there are good days and bad days and so you know it's it's like letting it's like in the middle of the song you know figuring out who who gets the lead and who who's who's got a company and let's stay with that theme for a minute, but I want to I want to say something specifically to you because you'll get this. It's hard to play a lead and to improv a lead and you just want to just kind of take off and do that in the middle of the of the of the set.

So yeah, how about this for today? You just go back and work on the melody of the song. Don't worry about the improv of the lead just hang on. I mean just hammer that melody down so that it becomes anchored in you. The improv will come the lead will come, but hang on to that melody.

I go back to what my piano professor told me take one finger and as a pianist that is torture to play a song with one finger, but take one finger now for a trumpet player is no big deal to play one note at a time, but no that's a joke, but take one finger and play that melody. That's what he would say and you had to play this expressively as a kid before you do any improv. He wanted you to know the melody and so before you go off into any improv. Really really really hammer down on that melody because that's who you are in your core. That's the song and then then you add the flourishes. Then you add all the other things, but right now Mark you're in that place of of losing yourself in this thing and losing the melody and you're doing great improv stuff and that's what you get a lot of the old.

You know that great jazz where the jazz are all over the map, but where's the melody of the song? And that's where that's what gets into our soul and and so II don't want you to put your music on hold because that's going to be a lifeline to you Mark. Yeah, yeah, I realized that would you will you make an effort today to just to pull out the guitar not the banjo, but no, I'm just kidding, but pull out the guitar and and just play the melody of of a song that is deeply meaningful to you. And and play that melody just as simply as you can, but as expressively as you can. Yeah, well, yeah, that's that's something that I find myself drawn to certain songs like you you're I know you're familiar with James Taylor.

You know his song Carolina on my mind or Carolina in my mind being being that I was born and raised in South Carolina. Yes, I do know that song. That's that song could be the theme song for an Alzheimer's person and if you listen to the words, you know the the the line, you know with a holy host around me still I'm on the dark side of the moon.

It's it's. Grab your guitar and play the melody of that song. Nothing else don't try to improv on it. Just play the melody and watch what happens to your heart as you do. It's gonna be some. It's a lot more work than you realize just to play the melody, but it's if you go back and do that and play that and play it slowly because your your brain and your talent move a lot faster than your heart and it's important to get those things in sync and just play it slowly and if you if you tear up and cry while you're doing it, Mark, that's okay.

Those are healthy tears. But if you know if you're slamming your guitar down like you're in the 70s rock band, those are not healthy things to do and and so you want you want to you wanna slow things down when you when you do these things because it it. It's a way to to there's stuff that's pent up in our hearts as caregivers and sometimes music is the is is a powerful way to let some of that stuff out. Yeah well and if we can figure out how to hook your guitar up, you and I can we can play some music here this morning, but if we can figure out how to do that remotely so. Yeah, I've had a lot of friends or some friends have asked me to they're other musicians.

I know are are playing these virtual concerts out of their living rooms and things and I haven't figured out how to do that myself. I've always I've always been more in tune with the music than the technical aspects and I mean you have the machinery. Well that will come, but but I think my hope for you is is that you will play a virtual concert for yourself first. And yeah and let it let it express from who you are because that I think that's that's the the challenge we have as caregivers is that sometimes.

Some things are meant to be worn like a sweatshirt on the outside so people can see it and so forth and other things are are undershirts or T shirts that wear under all that is just for us and maybe today when I go to the piano, a lot of times, I'm not playing for an audience. I'm just playing for myself. This is a way for me to be able to work this out and I'm not on stage.

I'm not doing those things. I'm just I'm just working it out of working the kinks out of my own soul. That's where I think it starts for us as musicians. So so I would I would really recommend if you could today pull out your guitar and and just softly slowly play Carolina on my mind. The melody just the melody then go back and start adding the stuff to it, but you know, it's just. Then then add.

But add it in slowly. Cuz we know how to do harmony. We can play harmony all day long. By the way, I can get kicked out of some churches for that cord right there. I know I'm just just I've I've done my stint in different churches at different times and and you know I some of the stuff got a little bit rocking and I saw some people shaking their heads that's alright.

They they they they they get happy the same shoes. I got mad in just play the song but but but play it and then you know what I'd like for you to do if you if after you do that, would you call me back sometime and just let me know how it went for you. Alright, I will this is listen. This is your show, man.

This is your time. You're we're both musicians. We're both caregiving husbands. We get it.

Okay. This is your time to be able to have this environment just to kind of you know it it you don't have to have some kind of prepared word or anything else. Sometimes you just need to just to hear a voice of an another fellow caregiver who's wrestled with these things and said, okay, where where where's my place in this? Where am I in this? Who am I in this?

Where's God in this? And that's what we do on this show. It's it's unlike anything else and so this is your time. Okay. Well, you know II just a number of times. I just wanted to call and let you know that your ministry here is you're definitely doing God's work and and and somebody it's it's something that's needed and II tell as many people who who are caregivers about it because I can because it's it's the the dialogue you have with people and the the things that you're able to relate is is is priceless to a person who's who's got who the Lord has given this to you know so. Well, thank you know that I recognize it for you. Well, I appreciate that very much.

Paul said in Corinthians, you know we comfort one another with the same comfort we ourselves are received from the God of all comfort. So I'm I'm just simply passing on what people have done for me. I've aggregated in a way that makes sense, but people have done this for me and I've had to work these things out the hard way and I'm grateful for the opportunity just to hang out with you guys this morning and and we all speak fluent caregiver here. That's that's what goes on. We speak fluent caregiver.

So this is a place where you can hear in your own native tongue. What's going on and so Mark II really appreciate the call. I want to hear back don't don't next time you think. Oh, I need to call or something.

I want to call or whatever don't hold up just call. Okay. I will I will and I'll I'll try to hook up my guitar next time so maybe we can you know jam it a little bit.

Well today today you have an assignment though today you have an assignment you're going to play the melody of Carolina on my mind and let it take you let the song take you where it's going to take you. Okay. Will do sir. Alright Mark. Thanks for the call. This is Peter Roseburg. This is Hope for the caregiver 888-588-8840 888-589-8840.

We'll be right back. Hey, this is Peter Roseburger. Have you ever helped somebody walk for the first time? I've had that privilege many times through our organization standing with hope when my wife Gracie gave up both of her legs following this horrible wreck that she had as a teenager and she tried to save him for years and it just wouldn't work out and finally she relinquished him and thought. Wow.

This is it. I mean I don't have any legs anymore. What can God do with that and then she had this vision for using prosthetic limbs as a means of sharing the gospel to put legs on her fellow amputees and that's what we've been doing now since 2005 with standing with hope. We work in the West African country of Ghana and you can be a part of that through supplies through supporting team members through supporting the work that we're doing over there. You can designate a limb. There's all kinds of ways that you can be a part of giving the gift that keeps on walking at standing with hope.com would you take a moment to go out to standing with hope.com and see how you can give.

They go walking and leaping and praising God. You can be a part of that at standing with hope.com. Welcome back to Hope for the Caregiver here on American Family Radio. This is the show for caregivers about caregivers hosted by a caregiver.

We speak for the caregiver here. How are you feeling? How are you holding up?

I'm going to do we got phone lines are completely filled up so I've got to see if I can go through these quickly here so I don't want to leave anybody but we'll do the best we can. Judith in Ohio. Judith Good morning.

How are you feeling? Judith? Well, we've lost Judith Donna in Illinois.

Donna in Illinois. Good morning. How are you feeling? Wonderful. I just love your show. Well, thank you very much. You and Gracie have have just touched many lives. You all are blessed to have each other and I just wanted to share that with you and I just feel touched and blessed to hear your show today. Well, thank you very much.

We enjoy doing it and we're grateful for it. Alright, let's see if we can squeeze in a couple more calls here. Rosalind in Florida. Rosalind. Good morning. How are you feeling? Good morning. I'm feeling great. How are you? You know, I've done a mental inventory.

Most of them is here so I think I'm okay. Okay. So, I am I am tired and a little flustered.

Um I see. No, no, Rosalind. Rosalind, let's stop right there. You said you were great. Now, you're tired and flustered.

Yeah, I am before the caregiver part. Well, let's let's let's lead off with the tired and flustered and we'll go from there. How about that? Then, we'll go.

We're going to work our way back to great because I'm working my way back to great now. Yes. Alright. Yes. Yes. Go ahead.

Okay. Well, I am I am helping to take care of one of my sisters that had a leg amputated about 6 years ago and the other leg is really bad and she's very resistant right now about going to the doctor because she's not she was in the bed for 3 days without eating or drinking or pretty much anything. So, last week, on Mother's Day, came by and some of the other family members came by to get her up. So, today, I'm here with her trying to get her to go get a blood test.

So that. Is she diabetic? What's going on? No, she's not. She's not diabetic.

She has Burgess disease from smoking. Okay. Well, you know my my wife's an amputee. Did you know that? Yes, I do. I did know that. Both legs. I've been listening to you for years now.

Well, thank you very much. With both legs, you have a smartphone? Yes. Mm hmm.

Pull up pictures of my wife and show it to your sister. Okay. Okay.

And and say, look, look at what she's doing. I mean, we're we're we're sending some supplies right now to Africa. By the way, speaking of prosthetic legs, did you know we could recycle prosthetic legs?

Wow. You know what? So, tell your sister when she goes. Recycle it for her because she had never, the one that they made for her originally was not not suitable. So, she finally got another one. Well, don't throw away those old ones.

Oh, no. I'm going to send it to you. I'm glad that.

Go to go out. Go out to standingwith hope.com slash recycle and we'll take those things and and it goes to a prison in Tennessee where inmates volunteer and they'll they'll disassemble and we'll take all the usable parts. We're putting together shipment right now.

We're hoping to go over there once this virus thing ends and and go over there and help continue our work. We've been doing it for 15 years but I want you to show those those pictures to your sister of my wife doing this. My wife's had eighty surgeries that I can count. Body is completely broken. Both her legs. In fact, we're seeing a prosthetist on Monday to kind of work through some stuff. She's got a wound on her leg right now. We're trying to get it fixed and ask your sister to borrow a little bit of my wife's courage to help her get out of the bed a little bit.

Yeah. Well, she's been we've been coming over every day since last Sunday. Me and my I have a sister that's a nurse and her daughter and granddaughter. We've been coming over every day helping out and doing things with her and for and her hope has been regenerated. So, I had to like, okay, we gotta go get the blood test. We gotta go. So, she finally got up this morning and I'm waiting on her now until her daughter gets here to take care of her.

About at the end of the show. So, let me ask you this. What are you doing for you? Well, right now, what I'm doing for me is I read a lot. I started school at Oral Roberts University to get my masters and that was way too much. So, I had to I I I'm not going to go because I just don't like all online classes.

It was just really hard for me and so I walk and I run and I just eat right and and pray a lot. That's what I'm doing for me right now. Can you is there a school locally that you could maybe check out and just do a little bit of classes online? Yeah, well, what I thought I'd do is do some certificate classes that I can that I can focus and that I can afford because before I had to get another grant, I'm going deeper in debt and that don't make any sense.

So, I want to do something that I can afford and get some certificate classes and and help out that way for it because I have a degree in psychology and I have experience counseling. So, I would like to do more with that. Well, I think that would be a marvelous idea and yeah, don't go deeper in debt. That doesn't work unless you're evidently the Congress of United States. No, I'm just kidding. I don't want to squirm it in that.

I looked at Nancy Pelosi sent that wish list over there to the House of Representatives. I'm thinking, oh my gosh. These people bless their hearts. They have a, you know, you you can't fix that level of stupid.

I mean, there ain't no medicine for that. So, but do look into those certificate classes for yourself, okay? Alright. That you can afford because it's look, Rosalind, it's important that you push yourself mentally to to to stay engaged and out there and and show show pictures of Gracie to your sister.

Let Gracie's courage help inspire your sister but right now, I want you to be able to have a little bit more pep in your step. So, keep running. Alright.

Keep reading and keep learning and you know what? Thank you for calling. You're welcome. Thank you. Alright. We'll see you next week. Hey, this is Hope for the caregiver. We gotta go. Hope Healthy caregivers make better caregivers. Hope for the caregiver.com. Today's a great day to start being healthy. We'll see you next week.