A Conversation with Jamie Arnette

TNG Radio, where today's culture and timeless truths come together. It's reasoned relevant content apologetics, worldview, and answers to the questions that you need to know. From Alex McFarland Ministries, this is Truth for a New Generation Radio. And now the man who preached in 50 states in 50 days, speaker, writer, and advocate for Christian apologetics, Dr. Alex McFarland. Why do we suffer?

And what should be our reaction when suffering comes along in life? Hi, Alex McFarland here, Truth for a New Generation Radio. Welcome to the program because we have got an amazing show, because we've got an incredible guest that I want you to meet in just a minute.

But I welcome you to the program. As I record this, I'm on the road, and certainly everyone knows, and the whole world is talking about the coronavirus, and there's the initial health implications of that, but then there's the social and cultural, political, economic implications of that. People are cleaning out grocery stores, some are hoarding things, and others are not able to get things they need. Our president called Sunday, March 15th to be a national day of prayer, and while tens of thousands of Christians were praying, and no doubt are praying, the fact is, many churches, the majority of American churches weren't open. Sadly, in the 242 years of our nation's history, Sunday March 15th is probably the least churched day in our nation's history, more than ever. We need to have our house in order and turn to the Lord.

I want to read a scripture, 2 Corinthians 6, 3-5. The apostle Paul wrote this. He said, �We live in such a way that no one will stumble because of us, and no one will find fault with our ministry in everything we do. We show that we are true ministers of God,� now listen, Paul says, �we patiently endure troubles and hardships, calamities of every kind. We've been beaten, been put in prison, faced angry mobs, worked to exhaustion, endured sleepless nights, and gone without food.� And so clearly Paul knew what suffering was.

He also knew what it was to maintain a good testimony in times of suffering. So let me encourage all of you, look, God is in control, and there is a type of argument in apologetics called an a fortiriori argument from the greater to the lesser. If God can do the greater thing, he can do the lesser thing. It's almost like this.

If you could bench press 200 pounds, you could probably lift two pounds. And so if God can create the world and pay for sin, conquer the grave, if our Lord can be the creator, savior, the victorious king of eternity, he can help us through the next week, month, six months. So we turn to Christ. Well, I want you to meet a special friend. You know, in the course of ministry you meet a lot of people.

Some make more of an impression than others, understandably so. And few people have ever inspired me like Jamie Arnett. We've been together doing some ministry this weekend. And he's got a story of victorious Christian living, and I want you to hear it.

And he, like few people I know, he and his dear wife are a shining example of worshiping the Lord, praising God in all situations. And I think the story of the Arnett family is going to be very significant in your heart. So I want you to listen carefully. But first of all, Jamie, welcome to T&G, Truth for a New Generation, and thanks for taking some time to be with us. Well, thank you for having me. And I have enjoyed our weekend together. It's been amazing. Thank you for the words you just spoke.

You spoke it in such an articulate, fantastic way. I think we do need to be encouraging people to be firm in the faith in these uncertain times. Now you are pastor of a great church, First Baptist Church in Dillon, South Carolina. Dillon is a city on I-95. Tens of thousands of people a day, a month go through Dillon, and you've got the privilege of pastoring First Baptist. Tell us about that. Well, we have a wonderful church at First Baptist. We have an amazing body of believers. They're supportive of one another. They're firm in the faith.

They stand on the Word of God. They're committed to our church and our community, committed to Christ. And so it's been a pleasure to serve such an amazing church. I feel like they've taught me more than I've taught them in many, many ways. Well, and you and your wife have been married how long?

Thirty years, this coming July. And how did you guys meet? We actually met at a summer camp at Pine Hill Baptist Retreat that's run by our association, the P.D. Baptist Association. So we met there, started dating, and then the story goes on from there. Yeah, I've actually spoken at Pine Hill.

It's a beautiful place. Now folks, one of the questions I get from young people, and I want to throw this to Jamie, is, well, if God loves me, why is my life so hard? If God loves me, why do things go wrong and why do we suffer? Even for a Christian, Jamie, life is not without its challenges, is it?

Absolutely not. When we're young, specifically when we're talking about being married and young people are getting married and they stand at the altar and they say, I do, a lot of times they say, for better or for worse, for richer or poorer, and all those types of things, but they have no idea what's coming down the pike. And so later on in life, things might be drastically different than they had ever imagined. But God uses all those things to grow us and mature us in the faith. And if I could just take a moment, I'd like to share a little bit about that. Paul said that we are to love our wives, husbands are to love our wives as Christ loved the church and he gave himself for her.

Well it's one thing to say that. It's just black ink on white paper for most of us, but when you get to a situation like Kathy and I have had for the last 15 to 20 years, we realize that that's not always the case. God is teaching us how to love our wives as Christ loved the church. And so it's a journey. You've had a challenge in your marriage that for 99% of people would be unimaginable.

Yes. About 15 years ago, Kathy was diagnosed with Huntington's disease. And Huntington's disease is a neurological degenerative disease that begins to debilitate a person. And they go – it's described as having Alzheimer's, Parkinson's and ALS at the same time because you have all of those types of symptoms. And so since then, our life has drastically changed in many, many different ways where she's completely dependent on a caregiver to feed her, dress her, get her ready each day.

She can't really do anything for herself. And so we didn't anticipate that 30 years ago. Folks, if you need your love for the Lord strengthened and maybe your appreciation for those around you, stay tuned. The story of Jamie and Kathy Arnett is going to continue on truth for a new generation. Love Christianity in the face of Huntington's disease.

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In Romans chapter 8, Paul writes that he says he is convinced nothing can ever separate us from the love of God, neither death nor angels, demons, fears today, worries tomorrow, not even the powers of hell can separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus. Hi, Alex McFarland here. Welcome back to Truth For A New Generation Radio. We're hearing the inspiring story of Jamie and Kathy Arnett.

And Jamie, again, thanks for being willing to share. Before we go too much farther, because people travel and people are all over America, what is the website for First Baptist Dylan? And if people wanted to find you online, how could they do that? Well, our website is www.fbcdylan.com.

So it's very simple, and they can find my email there and contact information that way, or they can contact us at 843-774-7387. So you and your wife are married. Fifteen years ago, she begins to develop the symptoms of Huntington's disease. Now, again, describe what Huntington's is, if you would.

Well, Huntington's disease is a neurological degenerative disease. It starts usually when a person is in their mid-30s. It can start earlier or later, but for Kathy, it started in her 30s. And it's just a gradual decline in a person's ability to walk, to speak, to talk, to communicate, to eat, all those types of things.

So they become, over time, totally dependent. How did you and she first begin to get the indications that this disease was coming on? What were her first symptoms? Well, we didn't actually recognize her first symptoms as being Huntington's, because she was having a few emotional issues, and we didn't recognize that as being Huntington's. But then she started having trouble with balance, having some cognitive issues, getting some things confused, and then we began to realize that she was having a problem, and we began investigating it.

And as we began to do that, it took us a while to really convince people that we were looking at Huntington's disease, because it looked a little bit different. But as we went through the genetic testing, she was diagnosed definitively. Now what was her career at that point? She had been a schoolteacher for 15 years. She taught second and third grades.

And so she taught at East Elementary, and she was a wonderful teacher, loved kids, and has always invested in young people. And when this – from the initial symptoms to it really began to take its toll on her daily life, how long of a period was that? Well, the first five years, she could still function fairly normally in a lot of ways. She could still walk, but she had to have assistance. But over the last 10 years, it's been drastically different, and we've had to have basically full-time caregivers for the last 10 years, where she can't walk at all.

She can't feed herself and things of that nature. So for the last 10 years, it's been a lot more demanding. You know, Jamie, when I came to your office at the church, I saw pictures of you and your wife doing all the things that a young couple does in the prime of life, and pretty wedding pictures and travel pictures and just a beautiful, joyful couple in love with each other, in love with the Lord. And suddenly, I mean, your world begins to take a turn that for most people would be unthinkable.

And again, right in the prime of your young adult life. How did that impact you, not only as a husband, but even as a Christian? Well, to be honest with you, it was not an easy journey.

We had to go through some changes. And for me, one of the things I did is, at times, when I questioned God, I didn't question why is this happening to us. More, I questioned God is, why can't I help her? And I felt so helpless during this particular journey. And I remember one day, I was having a little bit of an issue, and I was struggling, and I said to God, I just asked him, why?

Why can't I give her relief? It just seemed so unfair. And I've always heard you shouldn't thank God. But then one day, I was thinking about that, and I remember Jesus on the cross, and he said to his father, this is the king of the universe, who says to his father, why have you forsaken me? And that darkest moment, he felt like he'd been forsaken. And so, at times, we may feel forsaken, but it's at those times when you really feel the grace of God. And I didn't really understand that initially, but I came to understand when Paul said that his grace is sufficient.

I learned that the gravity of those words through this particular journey, when I got into my deepest, darkest hours, when I could call on him and realize that his grace truly is sufficient for us. Darrell Bock How has this impacted Kathy's walk with the Lord? Darrell Bock Well, you know, she's been an amazing person through this whole journey. And she has encouraged me in some ways. She's taught me so many lessons. And one of the things that I think that she taught me, and I'll just share this with you, one of the things with Huntington's disease is a person can't really govern their temperament sometimes. And it's not that they mean to do that.

They just can't control it, because the elements in the brain that help control temperament are impacted. Well, one morning, I was trying to get her dressed for church. And I remember I had to do her hair and had to put her makeup on. I had to get her dressed. And sometimes when you start making those transitions, it gets a little volatile, and she was not letting me get her dressed. And so I went and sat down, and I said, okay, when you're ready, just let me know.

I'm going to sit over here and wait. And I began to kind of pout a little bit, and I kind of started breathing under my breath to God. And I said, well, God, I don't understand this. I said, you told me to love my wife as Christ loved the church. And you want your church to be a radiant, beautiful bride. And that's what I'm trying to do for her, and she won't let me. And it's like God said, well, now you know what it's like for me when I'm trying to get you dressed. And I want to get you ready.

You're always pushing back, and you won't let me shape you into what I want you to become. Darrell Bock You know, I'm thinking about how this has definitely touched you as a Christian, as a minister, and as a husband. You're a pastor of a church. I've pastored, and no doubt you and I both have stood in front of many audiences. And we preachers, we can say, live for Jesus. Take up your cross. It's easy to preach it, but it's not always easy to live it, is it, brother?

Gary Barnes Absolutely not. And I think when you go through these experiences, I think you can appreciate the things that other people go through, and they're a whole lot more compassionate about the struggles that they face. And so I don't just want to give a pat answer anymore. I realize there's a lot more to their story than what I maybe had thought before. And so I begin to look at them differently. I look at them with their hurts, their struggles, and I can appreciate the things that they go through.

I think it really gives you a greater level of compassion for other people. Darrell Bock Folks, we're talking with Pastor Jamie Arnett, and his dear wife, Kathy, is suffering from Huntington's disease. And we're going to have to take a break. Now, folks, you don't want to go away, because there is practical takeaway for each and every one of us in this story.

Just a quick question, though, Jamie. For those that want to learn more about Huntington's, because this is a very, very serious illness, about as debilitating as any illness could possibly be, how can people learn more about Huntington's? Gary Barnes Well, there's a website that you can go to. It's hdsa.org, and that's Huntington's Disease Society of America. And that will give you a lot of information about the disease and how it manifests itself and how you can maybe support folks who are going through this disease. And so it impacts families, whole families sometimes.

And so they need encouragement from a body. And our church body has been fantastic in supporting us through this journey. Darrell Bock Stay tuned. We're going to come back with more with Jamie Arnett and his story with his dear wife Kathy. This is Truth for a New Generation Radio with Alex McFarland, following God in the face of suffering.

Don't go away. Christians don't necessarily agree with one another when it comes to questions of religious pluralism, homosexuality, the role of government, abortion, and war. Too often we manage these disagreements by ignoring them. Yet we're called to engage the world for the sake of Christ.

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But I will say this. My speaking calendar is on my website, alexmcfarland.com. And as of this recording, about my next eight weeks of speaking events have been canceled. And so I want to say please stay tuned. Also we've got some press releases going out, and I will probably be doing some media interviews in the weeks ahead, hopefully to be able to bring a Christian perspective to what's going on in the news. But pray for the ministry if you would. We are dependent.

I'm on the road speaking. And the prayers and support of God's people enable us to do events, publishing and broadcasting. So if you've thought of making a contribution to Truth for a New Generation and Alex McFarland Evangelistic Ministries, it would be much appreciated. Your tithe belongs to your local church, and churches are definitely needing more than ever the support and the buy-in of their members. So listen, trust God. And there's no more urgent place that we need to trust God in than in our finances. So don't let this rattle you. Don't let this get your eyes off God or your Christian walk.

We know God is faithful, and God does provide. And I want to resume my conversation with Jamie Arnett. We're talking about his wife coming down with Huntington's. And I want to say, when I was with you yesterday, Jamie, just your interaction was such a beautiful thing and the smile on her face. But as the disease has intensified, communication has become more and more difficult, hasn't it?

Absolutely. She really can't articulate her thoughts very well. And so usually she just uses one word, sometimes an expression, and you learn to be able to pick up on the subtle clues as to what she's thinking and what she's going through. So communication has definitely been a challenge, but we still have some of those ways that we can communicate just because we know one another so well. And you've had to rely on help from family and from the church. I mean, at this point, Kathy can't be alone. Is that right?

That is correct. And one of the things I would like to say is that I don't know how people could go through this type of disease on their own. We have had the support of our church in such an amazing way. We have ladies from our church who have been staying with her.

Some of them have been staying with her weekly for ten years, and they do that voluntarily. And so they have been such a resource for us in a time when we had to go through the process of learning to depend. We don't like to depend on other people.

I know I certainly don't. And when we first had to come to depend on other people, it was a very difficult thing for us to realize that we are totally dependent and we need other people to come alongside. So God has been teaching us about depending on him and depending on one another, and we really find out what the body of Christ looks like when we go through a disease like this.

You are a great testimony, and I want to say thank you for being such a great witness. Did you ever wake up and say, you know, I don't believe in God anymore, or Christ has abandoned me? I mean, did you ever have one of those dark nights of the soul?

I don't think I've ever doubted God, but sometimes I've doubted whether he was going to supply what we needed at times. And I remember one day I was just going through a very difficult time, and I felt like that Satan was using this disease to just beat me down. And I said to God, I said, you know, Satan is using this disease to beat me down emotionally, spiritually, physically.

I don't feel like I can continue to endure. And at that moment I realized when Paul said that a messenger of Satan had been sent to buffet him, I realized what he said when he said that God's grace is sufficient in our weakness. And I began to realize the gravity of that statement.

It wasn't just a word on a page. It was a reality for me. And I began to realize that God's grace truly is sufficient in our darkest times. And so God has sustained us over and over and provided every resource.

I just cannot really express how thankful I am to God and how he's met every single need that we've had at every step of the way. Has it been difficult? Absolutely. Have there been times where we've struggled and maybe had doubts how God would provide? Absolutely. Have there been some dark nights where you didn't feel like you could make it through the next day?

Absolutely. But every time God has sustained. And so looking back in hindsight, you just see God's hand of provision so faithful through this journey. Darrell Bock What has your ministry to your wife taught you about Christ's ministry to the church?

Darrell Bock Well, it has definitely taught me that Christ loves us unconditionally and in such an amazing way. My wife cannot reciprocate to me the things that I have to do for her. And I realize that when Christ loves us, we can never reciprocate the same amount of love that he's given toward us. And so I don't love her to get back. I love her because I want to serve her.

I want to make her a life as joyful on this earth as I can as she goes through this horrible disease. Darrell Bock Paul wrote in 1 Corinthians 15, I die daily. And endless things have been written and said about taking up our cross. Jamie, what do you say to the person who is bearing a cross or maybe entering a season of suffering right now and they're at a crossroads?

They can really do this journey with Jesus or maybe they can shut the door of their heart and push God out or whatever. To the person who's bearing a cross and is in a hard place right now, what would you say? Jamie McPhee Well I think one of the things I would say is, you know, our suffering on the other hand, I would say, Lord, help me to learn what you want me to learn from you as I go through this journey.

Darrell Bock You know folks, you've been listening to the story of Jamie Arnett and his wife Kathy Huntington's disease. And you know, we've got a little booklet that we would like to give you. It says, What Does God Say About My Relationship With Him?

We've given this booklet away to more than a quarter million people. And if you need to come to Christ or you need to come back to Christ, do that. Jesus is as close by as a prayer. He loves you very much. Maybe you feel like you've failed the Lord a lot of times.

We all do. But as Jamie Arnett says, God loves you unconditionally. Turn to him. And if we can help you in your walk and witness in any way, go to AlexMcFarland.com. Reach out to us.

We would love to hear from you. And again, at this time of pandemic and so many people, just the whole world, the world is just almost unraveling right now. Build your life on the solid, unshakable rock of Jesus Christ. God bless you folks. Thanks for listening. Pray for this nation and this world. And let your light shine for Jesus today and always. Thanks for listening.

That's 877-YES-GOD and the number 1. Or give online at AlexMcFarland.com. While you're there, listen to program archives, read Alex's blog, invite Alex to speak at your event, or contact Alex with a question or comment. AlexMcFarland.com. Thanks for listening today and join us again next time as we bring you more truth for a new generation on TNG Radio.