God who comforts the downcast. comforted me by the coming of Titus I love that. What brought Paul out of his downcast Episode, it wasn't another verse. It wasn't another, here's a book, read this. It wasn't another, you really ought to go plant another church.
It wasn't another gift of money. It wasn't listening to another sermon. I don't know about that one, but it wasn't that either. It was the arrival of another believer. A moment ago, Stephen was describing an experience that the Apostle Paul had when he was lonely.
He was blessed and encouraged by the arrival of Titus. As Christians, We're called to fellowship, not isolation. But Loneliness is becoming a major problem in the church today. People are surrounded. but lonely.
Well, King Solomon talked about this in the book of Ecclesiastes. And we turn there again today here on Wisdom for the Heart. Stephen Davey is about to show you God's wisdom to prevent loneliness. This message is called Ministers of Loneliness. Researchers created an interesting scenario I read about recently where a group of people would form a circle and.
play a game of catch with a small ball. young adults and older as well. The participants were told to try to keep the ball aloft and not let it hit the ground.
However, One woman in that Circle wasn't aware that all the other participants had been told to never pass the ball to her.
So they began their game of catch. The ball was Tossed randomly from one person to another in the circle, but never to her. She appeared Patient at first. She laughed when the others laughed and smiled when the others smiled. But as the game progressed and the ball never came her way.
She eventually stopped smiling. She edged a little further into the circle to draw attention. And when that didn't work, She eventually, after several minutes, dropped her hands. not wanting to play or even attempt to catch the ball. After a numerous scenarios like this And with the interviews afterward with the individual who'd been left out.
The researchers discovered that the ostracized person Began to actually believe their lives, not just during the game, but their entire lives, were meaningless. They were unwanted. They were without purpose. It's interesting how they discovered how quickly someone could goes so deep and So far down. The author that I was reading that catalogued the research went on to apply this scenario to the reality of life.
Our world is filled with people hungry for someone to throw them a smile. or a word Or a nod.
Someone That will remind them that they have been seen. Their lives are not meaningless. or without purpose. You know, one study that I that I came across in in this particular genre of research. recorded that the average middle-aged person and older is in contact with a family member and or friend Barely one time a week.
Sometimes not even that. The lack of friendships, relationships. Family. creates in a word Loneliness And this is what many are now discovering to be nothing less than an epidemic. bringing with it a host of diseases and illnesses and issues.
A couple of years ago, I clipped an article out of World Magazine and stuck it in a file and came across it again. where the Prime Minister of England was speaking in an interview. And she said that loneliness Is the sad reality of modern life and it must be addressed. Following a study in the United Kingdom that paralleled uh North America as well. where loneliness was undeniably linked to heart disease.
And a host of other And then the Prime Minister announced this, and this is what struck my attention. She announced the creation of a new government position. and post entitled The Minister Of loneliness.
Now that didn't mean his job was to be lonely. It meant that his ministry and his office would be commissioned to find ways to practically and realistically deal with this epidemic. But the problem isn't new. By the what? In fact, before the fall of man, God addressed it.
If you're old enough in the faith and you remember all of the events that occurred in chapter one of the book of Genesis, God would create something and then He would summarize it by saying it was what? Good. He'd create something and he would say, it was good. It was good. It was good.
Long before sin. Entered that perfectly created Garden of Eden. In fact, even before Eve, Would be fashioned into existence from one of Adam's ribs. God makes this startling statement. It is Not good that man should be alone.
That's always struck me. Frankly. It's fascinated me.
Well, for starters because Adam had God. Adam won the loan. He was walking in the evening. With God in some fashion or form of his glory and But God said that Adam was alone.
Now, what God specifically meant was that Adam didn't have a counterpart. A companion, a wife. And with that, then, following that statement, God custom designed Eve As the first living female, and then brought her to Adam And Adam's response after he said Shazam, that's in the Hebrew Bible, you know, he. He makes this speech and God introduces the fellowship of of marriage. But he also states a principle for life beyond marriage.
Life was never intended by God to be lived in isolation. Whether it's The intimate partnership of marriage, or the fellowship of another believer, or. Even the buddy system back and, you know, on the field trip in third grade. Relationships are one of God's greatest gifts to combating this. Epidemic.
That is as old as man. of loneliness. Whether married or single, Young or old, we were never meant to live life. Alone. Maybe you're in need as we even begin to introduce the subject of this kind of friendship we'll discuss in our session today.
Dale Carnegie gives some good advice. He famously said a generation ago that you can make more friends in. In two months, by showing interest in other people, than you can in two years by trying to get people to become interested in you. The truth is the enemies never stopped. Since he isolated Eve from her husband in that temptation to try to isolate.
A person from everyone else to pull you away. and to bring you down to convince you to wait. on someone else to take the initiative and throw you the ball. That can happen in marriage. It could happen in the working relationship.
It can happen in the family. It can certainly happen. In the church. If you'll take your copy of Solomon's journal. We're in chapter four, where Solomon has just finished in Ecclesiastes describing.
The lonely life of a self-absorbed, self-centered, Miser. We called him Ebenezer Scrooge because he just fit. He's alone. He is all about himself. He is racing along in his mad pursuit For just a little bit more.
Let me just get a little more. Never mind, I'm alone, and I don't want anybody, I don't need anybody, and they don't need me.
Well, that really wasn't the truth. But he becomes the epitome. of loneliness. Now we need to understand that this context really doesn't break that thought.
Solomon. Immediately begins to commend relationships in the very next verse. We're in chapter four and now at verse Nine were Solomon writes, Two are better than one because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, One will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up.
Again, if two lie together, they keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him, a threefold cord. is not quickly Broke it. These happen to be wonderful principles.
Certainly, for a marriage relationship, you have the principle of provision and partnership and protection, and I've preached this in that way before. Uh good. Marriage isn't two people competing, it's two people cooperating in God's assignments that are unwrapped. over the course of a lifetime.
Now the reason Most people, including myself, until digging a lot deeper here for this study, assume that all he's talking about in marriage is primarily because of that phrase I read that if two lie together, They keep warm. We'll get to that in a minute. But Solomon is not just providing principles about marriage, he's providing principles about life. In general, About relationships, godly friendships, and community. and fellowship.
In general. In fact, it struck me after studying this passage that, in a very real sense, Every husband, every wife, every parent, every single person, every widowed person, every young person, every older person. Person in the body of Christ has been appointed by our Lord to serve in his cabinet. as ministers of loneliness. We address the epidemic.
We happen to be The cure. Togetherness is God's Solution to loneliness. And that's across the board. Just listen to the commands before we dive in to the New Testament church. They were told in the first century, certainly.
For us today. To rejoice one with another, Romans 12:15, to serve one another, Galatians 5:13, to forgive one another, Ephesians 4:32, to encourage one another, 1 Thessalonians 5:11, to offer hospitality to one another, 1 Peter 4:9, to pray for one another, James 5:16, to carry one another's burdens, Galatians 6:2. And the list is longer than that.
So what does this look like? In shoe leather. What does this look like? In in the workaday world, And in the church and in the family. What does this look like where we live and rub shoulders with one another?
Well, Solomon is going to provide for us. In this paragraph, what we'll call four practical ways. that this can happen. We'll call them the benefits of godly relationships. And the first one is this.
Assistance when assignments are tiring. Go back to verse 9 and let's sort of unpack it one verse at a time. Two are better than one. Because they have a good reward for their Toil.
Now this is homespun. Rather obvious advice. He's following up on his comments in the previous verses of the man who worked by himself. Benefiting nobody. Caring for no one.
And by the way, If you were with us on our last session, he enjoyed nothing. Scrooge never laughs. Enjoys nothing.
Solomon, by the way, doesn't say here you can never work alone. He's just stating the obvious, that another pair of hands Cut the load in half. The burden and the half. and double the output. And Solomon promises here, you'll notice that.
When you do have another set of hands, you'll have a good reward. That word for reward can be material blessing. But it'll be used later by Solomon in chapter 9 for spiritual. Blessing. And you've probably discovered If you've been around the assembly long enough, To serve the Lord, what it's like to join another group of people to tackle some task.
Maybe you've joined a service trip. And you've Gone overseas and gone through the labor of all of the travel, and then you arrive, and you and your teammates have undertaken very difficult work. You've been swinging hammers and swinging mortar, or maybe nailing shingles, and it wasn't easy. But why is it at the end of every day you sit there absolutely happy? Totally exhausted but entirely fulfilled.
Where is that closeness? How did that happen? One author, I think, said it well when he said that work is a sacrament of sweat. By which God reconciles us. to one another.
There's nothing like joining together. For some task. And a friend who comes along and offers another set of hands. Oh, that's far better. Than working alone.
Let me give you another benefit of godly friendship.
Solomon adds. It's encouragement when strength is failing. Encouragement when strength is failing. Notice verse 10: For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls.
and has not another to lift him up.
Solomon is describing here That moment when someone Falls. He's imagining Two. Companions walking along, they're traveling. And one of them falls, trips, stumbles. He's too hurt.
to get back up on his feet alone. There's no button to push. I have fallen and need help, right? He's out there alone and And Solomon says, if he is alone, woe to him, but if he's with another, well, that's great news. Because that other one can lift him up.
It was interesting to me to read one third-century church leader, in fact. The first full commentary of the book of Ecclesiastes that we have extant goes back. to its publishing date in the year 213 AD. Written by a church leader by the name of Gregory. And I have a copy of that commentary, and I was reading it on this text, and he writes that Solomon here is referring to not just falling.
He believes he's referring to someone who has experienced the greatest misfortune that anyone can ever experience. He doesn't say what it is. but that they've just experienced it. And Solomon writes, woe. to him, that woe isn't just, well, isn't that too bad?
That woe is a word that refers to someone in great Peril. This is a word that carries the connotation of danger. It's loaded with warning. Whenever we struggle or fall physically, or even more broadly, as Solomon implies in the verb, whenever we fail. Or we stumble in life, we need someone who will not walk away, but someone who will help us back up on our feet.
This is the Apostle Paul writing to the believers in Galatia, saying, Look, when you see somebody that's tripped up, Entangled in sin, you who are spiritual don't just stand there and point at them. Don't run away. Go help him get back on his feet. It's the same principle.
Solomon, by the way, isn't just sort of casually suggesting that this kind of companionship is a good idea and you ought to try it. He's actually saying you're in danger without it. Without this minister of loneliness. who comes and offers encouragement to those whose strength is failing. After falling.
Here's another benefit. Number three. Godly relationships provide support. When hope begins weakening. Look at verse 11.
Again, if two lie together, they keep... Warm. At first glance, it sounds like The marriage bed, that can apply unless your spouse has cold feet, then it doesn't quite work out as well as it seems to imply. But how can one keep warm alone? Now, the immediate context again is of two people traveling.
Two companions. They're lying back to back out there and under in a conditions of some cold Palestinian night. In fact, every commentator I read Uh Pointed to this text as describing the the typical culture of Solomon's day when two companions would huddle through the night. In fact, the more, the merrier. If you're a lot tough, if you got somebody to get up close to, that's wonderful.
And three is even going to be better. The more the merrier. The Australian Aborigines had a phrase for sleeping outdoors on cold nights. They would call it a three-dog night. In other words, it's so cold out there in the open, it's going to take three dogs to keep you warm.
In Solomon's day, travelers are sleeping out in the open beside the road, which is where they would typically sleep. There are no holiday ends. There there is The difficulty of surviving the night? In fact, the first commentary by Gregory that I mentioned takes this verb translated lying down to refer to living together. And warmth is expanded.
to comfort This isn't just good traveling advice, this is wisdom for life. Traveling through life. When times are hard, when those cold winds of Of difficulty or pain or opposition or trouble below, and that hope. You have wanes when assurances grow weak. These are the times when the heavens are made of brass, when you're numb to God's voice, you're numb to God's word.
You need a friend who comes along with words of encouragement and solace and exhortation, who encourages you, who sort of warms your soul.
Soul who brings along the spark to get the fire back. to fire back up our heart.
Solomon is just saying, isn't it great when you have somebody like that? He's also implying, isn't it great when we're that? Minister. of loneliness. One more benefit.
Number four, they provide reinforcement when life becomes threatening.
Solomon writes in verse 12, and Though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand them. A threefold cord is not quickly broken.
Some see the Trinity here in the reference to a threefold chord. This is not a reference to the Trinity. Although the Trinity is a biblical doctrine. Others that I read, see this is a marriage Partnership that includes the Lord as the third Party. That's certainly a true and wonderful picture of a godly marriage.
Others believed it was a husband, wife, and a child that provided this triangle of commitment.
Solomon isn't saying here, however, that a threefold cord can't be broken. He's saying that it can't easily be broken, and he's simply giving again. Down to earth, obvious practical advice. Isaiah will use the same word Solomon uses here for it. broken or easily broken.
He uses it to refer to tent cords that are snapped That are pulled up out of the ground by an army that's defeated another army, and they're going to take those tents down and take those people captive. This word for being broken has a military nuance of being defeated. This is what he's saying here. You're in a fight. You're in a struggle.
You're under attack physically, or more broadly, under spiritual attack. How critical it is to have reinforcements who will watch your back. Who will lift you up in prayer? Who will engage? with you in battle.
Who will stand for the truth you cherish? Isn't this a wonderful picture of the redeemed? Simply put, there is safety in numbers. In fact, if one isn't as safe as two, And two isn't as strong as three, that's even better. That's even more less likely to be overpowered.
How about a hundred? Or 200. Or a thousand. This is Solomon's commendation of community. The advice is the antidote to what Chuck Coulson, founder of Prison Fellowship, now with the Lord, called this dangerous virus of individualism.
We say, infected, he writes, Christians to act as if all that matters is Jesus and me. Or Jesus in my family. Never mind yours. And in doing so, he writes, missed the point altogether that Christianity was never intended to be solitary. And this virus isn't new, is it?
The danger to pull away. From the church, from the believing fellowship is still as real today as it was in the apostles' era. How do we know that? We know that because the writer of Hebrews is scolding believers who have already made it their practice to pull away from the assembly. To not meet.
To not serve. Hebrews 10. Paul had to reinforce humility in serving one another to the Corinthian church. They weren't just random believers floating through life, they were actually gifted appointees as members of a physical body. He uses that analogy of being feet and hands and eyes and ears, 1 Corinthians 12, and he scolds them as well for saying to other believers, and I quote, I have no need of you.
I don't need you, which is another way of saying, I don't want you to need me. This is the Apostle Paul describing an encounter In his own life, when he admitted to the Corinthian church that He'd been depressed. 2 Corinthians 7:6 is translated downcast. That sounds a little more spiritual. He's in the thick of the fight.
He's on the front lines. He writes that he's fighting afflictions without, and he's experiencing fears within, and he's been brought to despondency, depression, and discouragement. And then he says, This: God who comforts the downcast. Comforted me, comforted us by the coming of. Titus I love that.
What brought Paul out of his downcast Episode. It wasn't another verse. It wasn't another. Here's a book, read this. It wasn't another, you really ought to go plant another church.
It wasn't another gift of money. It wasn't listening to another sermon. I don't know about that one, but it wasn't that either. It was the arrival of another believer. The arrival of reinforcement.
It couldn't have happened to Paul without Titus showing up. Are you showing up? in the lives of others. Maybe someone Where do you serve? Reinforcement Assist.
Beloved, New Testament Christianity isn't just about believing. It's about belonging. You ever thought about the fact that our world longs today for what the gospel offers and what the church is to demonstrate? The church is the antidote to isolation The local community of believers is described in the Bible as a family. a wedding party A body A fellowship.
But Solomon Wraps up this chapter, and I'm going to take the next few lines very quickly because I don't want to spend another sermon just on this, and I believe it ties in contextually. To everything he's described, but he wraps it up by creating this parable. And the parable serves as an illustration of the danger of going it alone. Verse 13. Better was a poor and wise youth than an old and foolish king who no longer knew how to take advice.
Now, get this: he's describing a king who's become isolated on his throne. He wasn't about to listen to anybody any longer, which is another way of describing. In fact, notice he says he no longer knew how to take advice. This is another way of describing somebody who doesn't have anybody close enough to him to tell him the truth. You don't want to hear it?
But he is isolated.
So he's reached the pinnacle of power only to be stranded there alone. And lonely. At the top. Verse 14. This wise youth went from prison to the throne, though in his own kingdom he had been born poor.
This is a rags to riches. Terrible. Here's a young man. The context implies he's been in debtor's prison. But by his wisdom By his wits, His personality, his charisma, his charm, he wins the approval of the masses.
And before you know it, he deposes that old lonely king. And he steps into the throne. Verse 15. I saw all the living who move about under the sun, along with that youth who was to stand in the king's place.
Now, look what happens. There was no end of all the people, all of whom he led. Yet those who come later will not rejoice in him. Surely, this is vanity and a striving after wind. In other words, the masses eventually got tired of the young guy, too.
The implication is he grew older. And they got tired of him, and here's somebody new. The masses Eventually, choose someone else. And in the meantime, this king is like the other king in a long line of kings who become isolated and without friends. And even though you'd think they're at a place that's enviable, it's a place of loneliness.
And isolation. It's as if Solomon is saying in summary: all the world out there. The crowd out there is going to be fickle. There's nothing better than A friend. Who's faithful?
Perhaps you're thinking, man, I wish I had. A faithful friend like that, well, let me encourage you. Again, with the words of one author who challenged my thinking, he wrote, I went out to look for a friend. And they were nowhere. I went looking for someone who needed a friend.
And they were everywhere. If I could summarize chapter four, it would be simply. Don't give your priority to possessions or power or prosperity. Give your priority to people. Accept your appointment.
by your divine prime minister. Your appointment to the cabinet position in the world as a minister. of Loneliness. Looking Reaching, serving. your church, other believers.
Family taking every opportunity God brings you to reach a very lonely world around you. And if you could describe our world, it would be that word. Lonely. Ask the Lord. to bring someone along your path.
You look for them. You take the initiative and ask God to give you an opportunity to tell them. that Jesus is the ultimate. faithful. Friend.
And because you belong to Jesus. You'll be willing to be their friend. As well. That's good advice today from God's Word. You might be the one who's feeling lonely.
Perhaps the best next step you could take would be to search for someone who needs a friend. and offer the companionship and fellowship of Jesus Christ. Today's message, Hereon Wisdom for the Heart, is called Ministers of Loneliness. It comes from the book of Ecclesiastes and a series called Surviving Evil Under the Sun. Your Bible teacher, Stephen Davey, has several more lessons in this series and I hope you'll be with us for all of them.
If you ever miss one of these broadcasts, you can listen to Stephen's messages in their entirety. On our website. wisdomonline.org Stephen has been teaching God's Word for 35 years. and the entire collection of lessons is posted to that site. You can listen to each one, and you can read Stephen's manuscript.
we make those resources available to you free of charge. Once again, that's wisdomonline. org. Even more convenient than that is our app. Wisdom for the Heart is a ministry of Wisdom International.
You can find the Wisdom International app for your phone or tablet in the iTunes, Google Play and Amazon stores. Just like the website, the app is also available free of charge.
So download that and take these resources with you wherever you go. I'm Scott Wiley, and for Stephen and all of us here, thanks for listening. Please plan to join us next time right here on Wisdom for the Heart.
