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What Does Husband Have To Do With Father?

The Christian Worldview / David Wheaton
The Truth Network Radio
June 15, 2024 2:00 am

What Does Husband Have To Do With Father?

The Christian Worldview / David Wheaton

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June 15, 2024 2:00 am

GUEST: BRUCE WHEATON, father of host David Wheaton

This Father’s Day weekend, we are going to go back in time to 2010 to hear an interview with my own father, Bruce Wheaton.

Many of you know that God welcomed my dad into heaven February 1, 2023 at age 91. Our family has joy that he is in the eternal presence of the Savior he believed, loved, and obeyed. But we miss his presence with us tremendously, for he was a beloved husband, father, and friend to not just the members of his family but to many others as well.

My mom, who is 90, misses my dad most of all, which is understandable, considering they met when she was 15 and he 17 and were married for nearly 70 years. But God has given her a strong faith and a loving family to surround and help her. Her family, my siblings and grandkids, was taught and influenced greatly by my dad. So he is still strongly felt.

Proverbs 20:7 says, “A righteous man who walks in his integrity—How blessed are his sons after him.” That is the certainly the case with my siblings and me.

For many years, probably more than 15, my dad and/or my mom were guests on the program either on Mother’s Day or Father’s Day. It seemed normal to me to talk to my dad about various issues because that’s what we did as a family in the regular course of life. So what you hear today is what we heard in our home.

If you are a father, we hope you have a most blessed Father’s Day and may you, with God’s grace, continue growing into the man, husband and father that God desires you to be.
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What does husband have to do with father? We're going to go back in time today to hear from my own father, right here on the Christian Real View Radio Program, where the mission is to sharpen the biblical worldview of Christians and to proclaim the good news of Jesus Christ. I'm David Wheaton, the host. Thank you for your notes of encouragement, financial support, and lifting us up in prayer.

Our website is thechristianrealview.org, and all our contact information and social media pages will be given throughout today's program. Well, as mentioned, this Father's Day weekend, we're going to go back in time to the year 2010 to hear an interview with my own father, Bruce Wheaton. Many of you know that God welcomed my dad into heaven on February 1, 2023, at the age of 91. Our family has joy that he is in the eternal presence of the Savior he believed in, loved, and worshiped. But we miss his presence with us tremendously, for he was a beloved husband, father, and friend to not just the members of his family, but to many others as well. My mom, who is now 90, misses my dad most of all, which is understandable considering they met when she was 15 and he'd 17, and they were married for nearly 70 years. But God has given her a strong faith and a loving family to surround and to help her. And her family, my siblings and now grandkids, was taught and influenced greatly by my dad, so he is still strongly felt.

Proverbs 20 verse 7 says, A righteous man who walks in his integrity, how blessed are his sons after him! And that is certainly the case with my siblings and me. For many years, probably more than 15, my dad and or my mom were guests on the program either on Mother's Day or Father's Day. It seemed normal to me to talk to my dad about various issues because that's what we did as a family in the regular course of life.

So what you hear today is what we heard in our home. If there's been one recurring piece of feedback from listeners over the past 20 years of the Christian Real View Radio program, it is this, we so enjoy your interviews with your dad and mom. It has always struck me as interesting that simple conversations with my elderly parents elicited this kind of feedback, even more than the well-known pastors and authors who are often guests.

I've often wondered why this is. Perhaps it's the personal nature of the interviews, but I also think it's hearing from a couple who have been married and followers of Christ for many, many decades, who communicate in clear biblical terms that resonates with all of our hearts. So just a couple things before we start.

The program was produced a bit differently back in 2010, so the audio quality is lower. We also took listener calls at that time, so you might hear one or two of those today. And you may notice that I reference our website as thechristianrealview.com, but our current website is thechristianrealview.org.

Well, enough of the minor details. If you are a father, we hope you have a most blessed Father's Day, and may you, with God's grace, continue to grow into the man, husband, and father that God desires you to be. Now let's go back to the year 2010 to hear this interview with my dad.

We have our annual interview with my own father, Bruce Wheaton. I've been doing this for about five or six years now, and let me start out reading a verse. This is sort of the verse of the day from Colossians 3, verses 19 and 21. It says, Husbands, love your wives and do not be embittered against them. And then two verses later, then it talks about not husbands, but fathers.

Do not exasperate your children so that they will not lose heart. I was thinking this week about the Father's Day interview, and in the past we've talked about the father aspect of Father's Day, but what does it mean to be a husband? How does that go into being a good father, being a good husband, a loving husband, as it says in that verse.

Husbands, love your wives and do not be embittered against them. Does it take being a good husband to be a good father? This is a good opportunity this weekend to consider what it means to be a good and godly father. Who are the best biblical examples of a godly father?

What are their shared traits? What must guide fathers to parent well in this difficult culture? We live in a very difficult culture to parent right now to be a father.

How does being a loving husband to his wife impact being a good father? My own father has been a father for 56 years and has been a father for 54 of those years. He has some experience in both aspects of being a husband and a father.

He is 78 years old and the father of four children and six grandchildren. Before I bring him on, I wanted to give a little introduction in the past. I've let him give his background and so forth. I was thinking this Father's Day weekend about a few things that would describe my dad. If you haven't heard the programs in the past, it might be helpful to give you some background and some of his character qualities.

I wrote down five things, not in any particular order of priority, but just five things that stuck out to me. I could have added several more, but just for the sake of time, the first one is steady. He's a very steady person. He's not a home run hitter, if you know what I mean from the baseball metaphor. He hits singles and doubles and occasionally a triple. He hits for a percentage and he plays between the lines of life.

He's not someone who swings for the moon and then strikes out. He's someone who keeps it very steady. Number two, he's highly practical. He was a mechanical engineer, after all, for over 25 years.

Left the house in the morning, early in the morning, came back Monday through Friday in the evening, had dinner with the family. Very traditional American working man type of existence. He operates on his mind, not his emotions. He is an emotional person, but he's directed by his practical nature rather than his feelings. Number three, I would say servant is a word that describes him well. He is very focused on almost naturally.

He doesn't seem to have to tell himself or cajole himself to do it, but he's focused on serving others. He's always at one of the kids' house helping us with something that's gone wrong mechanically or technically in the house or computers or just advice on life or on something to do with anything. The car, he's just always focused on helping other people, even outside our family as well.

So steady, practical, servant. And the fourth one is family. A lot of men are focused on their golf games or going off hunting and fishing and want to be with the guys and so forth. I don't think there's anything wrong with that, but my dad's less focused on that than he is on spending time with my mom and our own family. It seems that his discretionary time is always spent doing something with us.

So he's put family as a priority rather than his own individual hobbies or interests. Number five, character trait that just sort of sums up my dad well, I think. And I think there are more. I was thinking about this list.

It was getting longer and longer. But this one is a peacemaker. He's not a contentious person. You know how some men always got to kind of be positioning themselves for superiority, stepping on the next person's neck. He's not like that. I mean, he's competitive in a way, especially when he gets behind the wheel of a car.

But he is not jostling and trying to look out for number one, so to speak. And so those are some of the character traits that I think of when I think of my dad this Father's Day weekend. And again, we're very grateful that he's still around. He's had some serious health challenges with his heart for many years, going back into the 70s. And without modern medical technology of heart surgeries and so forth, he certainly wouldn't be with us. So we're very grateful to God for that and also for the doctors that have helped him. He's doing well now.

He's healthy. And we just cherish every day we have with him. So let me welcome him to the program now. And Dad, I'd like to wish you a Happy Father's Day weekend. And thanks so much for coming on the Christian worldview for our Father's Day weekend again.

Sort of like Daffy Duck says, it would be embarrassing if it weren't true. Yeah, that's another one, Dad. Sense of humor.

He's got that dry sense of humor. Anyway, Dad, let's jump right in to the topic. And what does husband have to do with father?

And I want to focus in a dual sort of way this weekend, not just what it means to be a good father, but what it takes to be a good husband as leading to being a good father. So let's go way back. You're 78 years old, Dad.

Let's go back more than half a century, if you will. Did you start out having guiding principles for being a good husband and father? Actually, no, David. At a young age, I was not a Christian. I was sort of like a ping-pong ball in the river of life.

You can just imagine the river going down with waves all over, and I was just sort of floating with it. And that is not living the Christian life. I didn't become a Christian until we were into our marriage by a couple of years, and everything changed at that point. No, I did not have any guiding principles for being a good husband or a father at that time. Well, you started dating Mom, or you met Mom at age 15, and I think you were married at 21 or 22. So you were married young, and you both weren't believers at that point, but you became followers of Christ within a couple of years after you were married.

I think Mom was 24 and 26. Were the things that you learned to be a good, loving husband and a good father, how did that take place along the way? What were the pivotal moments in there? Well, the biggest pivotal moment was about three years after we were married, because we had two very young children by that time and absolutely no real tools to rear them, except that when we became Christians through actually Christian radio, then the Bible became our focus, and we were able to assimilate the Word of God slowly and carefully and then bring up our children the same way. I know there is a verse in Proverbs 4 that says, Here, O sons, the instruction of the Father, and give attention that you may gain understanding. And I think that that became a guide to us in raising our children, that we wanted them to understand godly principles as we were beginning to learn them. But it was a long learning process, and that did happen about three years after we were saved.

And fortunately, and I know there are probably people listening out there that don't have this exact same kind of happening in their life, but first of all, if they're not Christians, they really should examine the Word of God and see where they would fit into the life of being a Christian and why we need to be born again. But also, unfortunately, in marriages, many marriages are made up of just one Christian wife or husband, and Mary Jane and I were very fortunate that we were both saved within a couple of months of each other. No doubt that's led to a strong marriage coming up on 56 years next week, which is truly remarkable. Let's talk about that for a second, how you and mom got together, because there are men listening today who may be in their late 20s, in their 30s, maybe their 40s, maybe even their 50s, who are not married.

It was just one year ago that I, this is actually my anniversary weekend this weekend, and I want to wish a very happy anniversary to my wife, Brody, and it's been a wonderful year together, and we're so thankful to God for putting us together. And we were single into our 30s, as you know, dad, and you begin to think about very carefully what you would like, sort of a checklist, so to speak, for finding the right spouse, either a husband or a wife. What would be your advice, your top three checklists, shall we say, for people who are single out there?

You got married when you were very young, but you saw something in mom when you were about 17 and she was 15. Looking back now, what should a man be looking for in a wife? Well, you have to marry the right person, of course, and this is big. So many marriages today are, they just shouldn't be married.

I mean, they shouldn't have gotten married in the first place, and they got married for the wrong reasons, and I don't know why some people get married, they get married on a wave of emotion or something like that. But it's important that they have, well, it's said that opposites attract, and this is true for magnets, but in a marriage it's best to find someone who possibly you grew up with or where you grew up, because there you don't have any geographic differences to deal with. I think a good suggestion is to have similar likes and dislikes, because if one person is completely over to one side, just on some simple thing, and you're totally on the opposite side, you can rest assured that could become a real problem in the marriage later on. I think in getting together, I think that they should have the same view on money, how they spend money, and they should have hopefully the same general education level. I think it's important nowadays especially that they see politically eye to eye.

It's difficult when two are married and one has a totally different view of what's going on in the world. And then of course the most important thing is that if you're going to marry someone, you want to marry a godly Christian, not just a cultural Christian. And you want to be able to choose that person. Unfortunately, I can't say I did all those things, because I was only 17 when I met my future wife, and she was 20 when we were married, and we were unsaved. So that last example of finding a godly person wasn't evident then. But we did have all these other similar attributes that I mentioned. Well yeah, and that was the sovereignty of God, being gracious to you even when you didn't know Him. Mom didn't know Him, bringing you together before you even knew it, and that's so comforting to know that.

But your last point was excellent. For those Christians out there that know they should marry another believer, that's got to be the first thing. That someone finds someone who's not only a believer, but is actually motivated to grow in their faith as well.

So you're not dragging them along. I'm speaking with my father today, here on this Father's Day weekend of the Christian worldview. We'll take a quick break, we'll come back. A lot more with my dad, that's next. The Overcomer Course for Young Adults is fast approaching on Friday, Saturday, June 21st and 22nd at Stonehouse Farm in Jordan, Minnesota, just outside the Minneapolis metro area. Age 18 to 28 is a highly transitional time of life. The Overcomer Course is designed to help young adults gain clarity and conviction on God's plan and their purpose in it. There will be eight sessions over two days on the most important issues of life, such as believing God in the gospel is the gateway to being an overcomer, handling God's word accurately, embracing God's design for gender, sexuality, singleness and marriage, stewarding God's design for time, work and money, engaging in the local church, and more. There will be teaching and discussion, activities between sessions, and meals served on site.

Reasonably priced lodging is nearby. We hope to see you June 21st and 22nd. Limited space remaining, so learn more and register at thechristianworldview.org or by calling 1-888-646-2233. Christians with discernment know that the U.S. public education system is humanistic to the core. That is because subversives have successfully removed from government schools the most important subject to understand truth and reality, God. While Americans were once educated at home or privately in an explicitly Christian way, today government schools are radically anti-Christian, propagandizing children with evolution, graphic sexual content, gender confusion, and globalism. Alex Newman's book, Indoctrinating Our Children to Death, is our new featured resource.

It's softcover, 276 pages, and retails for $17.99. You can order the book for a donation of any amount to The Christian Worldview. Go to thechristianworldview.org, call toll-free 1-888-646-2233, or write to Box 401, Excelsior, Minnesota, 55331. Welcome back to The Christian Worldview.

I'm David Wheaton. Be sure to visit our website, thechristianworldview.org, where you can subscribe to our free weekly email and annual print letter, order resources for adults and children, and support the ministry. This Father's Day weekend, we are airing an interview with my dad from back in the year 2010, when we discussed the topic, what does husband have to do with father? My dad went to be with the Lord in 2023, but the wisdom that God built into him continues to bless our family and others. And I want to wish all the fathers out there a very happy Father's Day weekend.

Hope you have a wonderful time with your family and your children, your wife this weekend. And we're talking just about that, what does husband have to do with father? And how does being a loving husband impact being a good father?

My own father is our guest today for our annual Father's Day interview. And continuing, Dad, did you have a strong desire? You were married so young. Was that one of the reasons you got married at a young age, because you had a strong desire to be a father? Well, actually not, David.

I didn't even think about that. I was in love with my girlfriend, and I wanted to get married, and I just enjoyed it so much. We really hit it off, and we've been hitting it off ever since. But no, not in my early 20s, I had no desire to be a father. But as I grew older, and became better versed in the Word of God, I wanted to be a helpful and good father. I read that in certain inner-city families right now today, the fathers are totally missing. I guess it's a very high percentage. And the general consensus in life now, in 2010, is that living at home fathers are becoming a rare species.

And so many homes are broken, and they seem to be trying to get along just fine, as if nothing's wrong. And actually, females are not even thinking about getting married. They're adopting babies on their own, and becoming so-called mothers without even having a father around. Now that may work out for a few years, but when the child comes to the teenage years, all bets are off on that kind of thing. I want to get to some of those statistics, and a little later in the interview, about what fatherhood and marriage is like right now in our culture.

I have some statistics from the Heritage Foundation, which are pretty hard to believe, and I think explain a lot as to where we are today in America. As you've grown as a believer, and as you've studied Scripture, what are the best biblical examples of a godly father that you've looked to, and what do you think some of their shared traits are? Well, look, all fathers make mistakes in being a father. I certainly did, and some fathers in the Bible did as well.

It is just the depth and inconsistency of our mistakes. But we can actually learn from the Bible through bad examples. Certainly not from Samuel, or David, or Solomon, though they obviously had great wisdom at times.

And these men really had some serious problems. And men like the biblical Jacob, for instance, loved his sons, especially Joseph. But Joseph came from a different mother than the others, so there may have been some reasons for why Joseph turned out better. But the example of the prodigal father in the New Testament, who was actually a representation of God as our example, is the best father of all in the Bible.

That is a great example. That's a picture of God, actually, in the parable of the lost son, how he demands his inheritance, his father gives it to him. That's like saying, I wish you were dead so I could get my inheritance. So he gives it to him, and the son goes off and lives a life of dissipation and immorality, and finally ends up with basically no job and living like pigs. And he says, what am I doing? I'm the son of my father, I had everything where I was, and I'm going to go back and I'm going to repent and ask his forgiveness, and I'm going to just ask him if I can be like one of his slaves. And he goes back, and the father doesn't begrudgingly bring him back in. The father runs to meet him, and this is a picture of how God runs to meet the sinner that comes back with a humble, repentant heart, a penitent heart.

And the father lovingly welcomes him back in. But that's a three-legged stool, because you have God and the prodigal son, but you also have the other son who is at home, and there's a huge lesson to learn on that side. Yeah, there is, about the pharisaical son who says that, I've served you my whole life, and he's doing it for an outwardly, but inwardly his heart is wrong before his father. Let me read another short passage here, Dad, from Ephesians 5, verses 25 through 27. It says, Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, that he might present to himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and blameless. This is a well-known passage about husbands loving their wives as Christ loved the church. And it seems pretty, whether it's in this passage or somewhere else, Dad, we see this encouragement, this command for husbands to love their wives, and then it's compared to Christ loving the church.

It seems like a simple command, but a little bit difficult to understand. How is loving your wife as Christ loved the church? It seems like a very different type of relationship. What do you think that passage means for a husband to love his wife? Well, I can preface that by saying, first of all, having a godly wife for 56 years, as I've had, has been God's perfect gift to me.

And as a more laid-back person, I really need her serious insights, and it's been a real benefit to me. But loving does, in the passage there, imply listening, and that goes both ways. Loving children is a discipline for himself and others, which the father does most often, and often with his children, with a paddle. But I think to be a loving husband does translate into being a good father, because loving is to provide for his children and his wife, especially in the encouragement in the spiritual side. And being able to mutually come together with your wife, and you're on the same plane, and you think the same thoughts when it comes to those Bible teachings. It says in 1 Peter 3, in what you were just talking about right there, that you husbands likewise live with your wives in an understanding way, as with a weaker vessel, since she is a woman, and grant her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life.

I'm not speaking about marriage there, so that your prayers may not be hindered. Let's answer the key question for the show then, dad, is how does being a loving husband, an understanding husband, as I said there in 1 Peter, how does that translate into being a good father? Is there a connection there?

Well, yeah, there is. I think being a loving father, a loving husband rather, we are called to be a help-meet to one another in the family, and I think that as we love our wife, we're also going to be setting a strong example for our children, loving our children, and they're going to see that, so it comes back to being a good father. Now, look, let me just say right off here that I don't have all the answers in life. I mean, I've had to experience ups and downs and low points in my life, so I don't want people to think that I've had a perfect existence and something that they can't even come close to achieving, but again, I don't have all the answers, only some that I've experienced, and I think God allows us to experience ups and downs in our lives, so that we can, if we are hopefully able to take that experience and see it from God's viewpoint in our lives so that we can become better people, and as you become a better husband, you obviously will become a better father. Well, let me parse that statement, you don't have all the answers in life.

You do have all the answers in life, at least when it comes to things that are mechanical or technical. We were going up to look at generators yesterday, my dad and I, and it often turns out we go to the store and you get with the salesperson, then you find out actually that my own dad knows more about the product than the salesperson who's not even, my dad's not even selling the item, with amps and watts and milli this and that and everything else, and so things like that are always so great to have you around, Dad, having your background as a mechanical engineer. Okay, now everyone, you're going to get a chance to join in on the conversation in the next two segments on the program. I'll put out some questions about being a father, how does being a good husband relate to being a good father, and so hang tight if you have some questions or comments.

This Father's Day weekend, you're listening to the Christian Worldview radio program this morning with my own father, annual Father's Day interview. Dad, how should a husband respond in a more difficult, marital relationship? This is a question that comes up very often when we've done this show in the past, where there's a husband out there who's saved, and as you mentioned earlier, he's married to someone who is not saved, maybe he was saved after they were married, and he became saved and his wife hasn't seen the light, so to speak, and there's tension, there's conflict within the marriage. How should a loving husband respond in some of those more difficult marital situations?

Well, I guess I'd have to ask you back, what do you mean by difficult? You'd have to say, how did it get that way? Because all marriages, when you think about it, generally start out with big smiles and rice throwing and a party to celebrate, so you wonder, well, where did this thing go wrong?

I mean, everybody who gets married, even someone like Larry King, who's been married eight times, he's had eight beautiful ceremonies, I'm sure, and with lots of partying and laughing and enjoying it, but if there's a difficulty, I think in a marriage they'd better go in reverse and back up to the original spark that caused you to marry in the first place. Okay, I'm just going to jump into this interview from 2010 with my dad on Father's Day weekend to say we're not going to go into a break, but we're going to continue with him. And the question is this. Actually, let me set it up by reading that short paragraph from the Heritage Foundation.

I received this this week. It says, quote, the principal cause of child poverty in the U.S. is the absence of married fathers in the home. That was said by Robert Rector, Senior Research Fellow in Domestic Policy Studies at the Heritage Foundation. Marriage is a powerful weapon in fighting poverty. Being married has the same effect in reducing poverty as adding five to six years to a parent's education level. In the paper that he wrote, Rector illustrates the severe social costs of record high births outside marriage, and this is amazing, and of homes without fathers.

Now, listen to this. The escalating rate of births to unmarried women, four of every ten babies overall in America, four of every ten, almost 50 percent of births now are to unmarried women, but more than half the Hispanic births and a staggering 70 percent of births for blacks are to unmarried women. So four of ten overall to unmarried women, over half to Hispanics unmarried, and over 70 percent for blacks is driving the collapse of marriage in America, Rector writes, especially in lower income neighborhoods. And then he goes on to say, marriage matters, but mentoring the bond between marriage and lower poverty violates the protocols of political correctness. Thus, the main cause of child poverty remains hidden from public view since the decline of marriage is the principal cause of child poverty and welfare dependence in the U.S. It would seem reasonable for government to take steps to strengthen marriage.

That from the Heritage Foundation, dad. And a couple of things here, they focus on child poverty for this article. We know there are lots of other very negative ramifications of unmarried mothers or unmarried fathers. And in the last line about it would seem reasonable for government to take steps to strengthen marriage, okay. But for our purposes of our show, how about Christians taking steps and the church taking steps to really strengthen marriage because there are lots of divorces amongst professing Christian couples as well. So here's the question for callers.

Dad, I'll let you answer it first. And it's this, why has being a married father been so diminished in our culture? Why has being a married father been so diminished in our culture? We used to have sort of the culture that my dad and mom grew up in where you were married young, you had a family, you stayed together.

People didn't even know anyone else who were divorced. But in a span of 50 years, all that's changed in the redefinition of marriage, even setting aside same sex marriage has completely altered. Why has being a married father been so diminished in our culture?

What led to that? Why are we where we are today from a standpoint of this, you know, marriage and being a father is whatever you want it to be? Well, defining family nowadays is much different today than it was back in our day when I was, you know, in my 20s. There has been a chipping away of our society very slowly but effectively, mostly thanks to the left-leaning liberal organizations out there that are promoting free sex and all that goes with it and relationships between men and men and women and women.

That's a total teardown. And our government now, at least up until a few years ago, the government was trying to restore the family. Now, our present government, our dear leader, is trying to tear that down and is actually trying to be softer to marriages that are, even homosexual marriages and so forth, which, of course, you can't have a family, you can't have children if you're homosexual marriage. But I think another thing in our society that is torn down in our culture is that just a little whittling away, and this was occurring back in the 80s and 90s, is that television sitcoms like All in the Family, they featured Archie Bunker, who we all laughed at, you know, but he was sort of a dud and then you had cartoons that still go on, like The Simpsons, they make fun of fathers and men in general. TV ads today are always showing a bungling man and a smart female. Have you ever seen a bungling female and a smart man situation on the TV ad?

Never. And actually, part of the responsibility is to the man who has swallowed the notion that we'd be better off in touch with our softer feminine side, which is a lot of nonsense. So I think there's been a total beating down by our culture, by television, by Madison Avenue and Hollywood, and it's just been chipping away over the years and this is where we are now. Let me take a crack at an answer to this question because I was listening to what you were saying and I was also thinking back to this past week, Brody and I went down to an inner city ministry here in Minneapolis. It was sort of a visitation night, you can get acquainted with what they're doing, went down to the inner city of Minneapolis, and being down there and seeing the people involved in this and then hearing some of their testimonies during their worship service that night, what struck me so hard was the fact that everyone talked about the lack of a parent, lack of a family, drugs and alcohol involvement, being involved in fornication, the generational curse that was brought up several times, and it just struck me so hard that what's the problem here is that the people who this ministry is speaking to, and we're so glad they are, but it's because they haven't had a family as pictured in scripture with a mother and a father that stay married and that focus and love their kids and raise their kids in the right way. It's because of that fundamental violation of one of God's first institutions, the family, that that's why it is the way it is in this inner city Christian ministry, where everything is just backwards and they're just trying to put band-aids on people's lives.

They're tutoring kids, and these kids have never had a parent sit down with them, and the mom's somewhere and the father's on drugs somewhere, he's out of the home. It's just the whole family has broken down, and that's why it is. Satan knows the family is such an integral part of society, probably the fundamental building block of society, and he attacks that, and he knows if he breaks down that, it just creates incredible problems. People get strung out, and then also for the government's purposes, it's wonderful for them, for people who have this left wing bent, because then more people become dependent on the government. And so why has father been so diminished in our culture?

Because it serves Satan's purposes, but it also serves government's purposes as well. Let's go to the phone lines, Dad. We'll take a few calls, questions or comments on this particular topic. Let's go first to Cincinnati, Ohio, and Kevin. Kevin, how would you answer that question, why has being a married father been so diminished in our culture, or if you have a question or comment from my father, that's fine too. Go ahead.

Hi. Yeah, I'm on the way to see my father for Father's Day, and I just happened to come across this radio station, and I think that partly the answer from my perspective, I think the church has failed in a lot of areas of really teaching what the truth of the father, of his role is, and it goes back to Genesis. You know, the father, or the husband was created to fulfill a role, and well, the reason I'm bringing this up, I'm trying to explain it, and I have a hard time doing that, but I got onto this new book, and it's totally changed my perspective on being a better husband, and teaching good biblical principles to your kids. Kevin, I'm going to put you on hold, because I know where you're going with the question, and then we're coming against a break, Dad, but it brings up a good point about the church's role in the whole thing, or a Christian's role. You know, so often today we hear about Christian churches, sort of, it's a feminine, more feminine environment, and some of the Christian teaching leaks in as loving your wife as, you know, putting her on a satin cushion, and it actually serves to sort of reverse the roles. How does a husband love his wife, Dad, without sort of changing, doing a role reversal, or really putting her in charge, if you know what I mean? Well, I think that's the wrong way to go, because the husband is supposed to be the head of the house, according to the Bible, and it's very important to revere your wife, and to have her be a total part of that situation.

I think that as a husband honors his wife, the children will see that, and they'll see that in their marriage they have a strong bond, and therefore, as a father, it's going to help you raise your children, and be the leader in the home that you should be. We'll come back, we'll talk more, and take your phone call, to Christian Worldview this Father's Day weekend. I'm David Wheaton. Lots of sponsor options, and non-golfers are welcome to attend the post-golf meal and message. From wherever you are in the country, you are invited to bring colleagues or clients to experience a unique day at Hazeltine, and discover how the Overcomer Foundation, the non-profit organization that directs the Christian Worldview radio program, is impacting lives. Again, the date is Monday, September 16th at Hazeltine in Chaska, Minnesota.

To find out more and to register, go to thechristianworldview.org or call 1-888-646-2233. The Overcomer Course for Young Adults is fast approaching on Friday, Saturday, June 21st and 22nd at Stonehouse Farm in Jordan, Minnesota, just outside the Minneapolis metro area. Age 18 to 28 is a highly transitional time of life. The Overcomer Course is designed to help young adults gain clarity and conviction on God's plan and their purpose in it. There will be eight sessions over two days on the most important issues of life, such as believing God in the gospel is the gateway to being an overcomer, handling God's word accurately, embracing God's design for gender, sexuality, singleness, and marriage, stewarding God's design for time, work, and money, engaging in the local church, and more. There will be teaching and discussion, activities between sessions, and meals served on site.

Reasonably priced lodging is nearby. We hope to see you June 21st and 22nd. Limited space remaining, so learn more and register at thechristianworldview.org or by calling 1-888-646-2233. Welcome back to The Christian World View. I'm David Wheaton.

Be sure to visit our website, thechristianworldview.org, where you can subscribe to our free weekly email and annual print letter, order resources for adults and children, and support the ministry. This Father's Day weekend, we are airing an interview with my dad from back in 2010 when we discussed the topic, what does husband have to do with father? As I mentioned earlier, my dad went to be with the Lord in 2023, but we are so grateful to the Lord for the 91 years He gave him and the wonderful husband and dad he was to us. And dad, I think what I'm going to do here, just for the sake of time, is Luis in Oklahoma City and Karen in Fayetteville, North Carolina, are waiting on hold, but I'm going to sort of summarize their question because they're answering the question, why has being a married father been so diminished in our culture? And if they don't mind, Luis talked about TV and pop culture being so difficult to be a father right now, and Karen in North Carolina said, the sexual revolution has destroyed our youth.

So let me summarize their comments and ask you a question. In this difficult culture today, with the smart phones, the internet, the media, the dating situation, the educational system, what specific things should fathers be doing? Well, they should be consistently involved with their family and children. They have to supervise carefully at all ages who their sons and daughters come around with, that's so important, and who they date. Do they have your specific approval at any age? They're friends, are you watching carefully on who they pal around with?

And of course, do you approve of who they choose to marry? And you mentioned phones. The web and smart phones are not morally smart at all. And TV today can be just soft porn. So many of the things you see on TV today, the way the women are dressed, it just gives girls ideas for how they should dress, you know, they copy. And boys, it gives them even worse thoughts.

And all this texting that you hear about can turn into sexting, as they say. They have to consider very carefully the need of college, too, and where they attend. All these things are so important.

Okay, I want to make sure we get to a couple other questions that are always asked during our interview, so we don't run out of time today. Colossians 3, 21, fathers, do not exasperate your children, that they may not lose heart. It says that there in Colossians, it says it also in Ephesians about provoking your children to wrath. But when circumstances get difficult with children, or even adult children, how do you decide in a course of action between unconditional love, as some people will say, or tough love, as other people will say? Hey David, I don't like either one of those terms. I'll frankly come out and say it. There's no such thing as unconditional anything.

This is just a pop psychology term. God's love is quite conditional, if you think about it. He says you have to receive my son as your savior, or you ultimately will be hell-bound.

Now, I didn't say that. God said it in so many different ways. And love is always tough, but kind, and never mean or vindictive, I think, in your family. And tough love is what? I don't know what tough love is.

I guess it's holding to biblical principles. One more before we try to get in one more caller. Here's another one that commonly comes up, Dad. This usually comes from grandparents, because you're a grandparent now to six grandchildren. You hear this quote, My grown, married children don't want my input. I see them doing so many things wrong with the way they're raising their kids, or in their marriage, and so forth, and I raise them a certain way, and now that they're grown, in their 30s and 40s, I see what I could help them with, but they don't want to listen to me. What should grandparents do in that sort of situation?

Well, it's a difficult question. Of course, every situation is different, but you can't let your emotions get in the way or force yourself on them. As you know, unasked for advice or nagging is the worst kind of all. And soft answers and continuing and open communication is so essential with your children that are married and have their own families. After all, they do have their own families. But you don't want to drive them further away.

You have to sort of wait for the right openings to express yourself. It's a delicate thing, and I think a parent has to be very careful about overly intruding. And yet, the grandparent does want to be able to express himself, and I think it's important that the children who are newly married listen to the older grandparents. Okay, let's go to one more caller listening on our great network affiliate, the Truth Radio Network in Davenport, Iowa. Cable, welcome to the Christian worldview. What is your question or comment for my dad on this issue of being a husband and a father this weekend?

Good morning. Who modeled what fathers are supposed to be like for us? There's a lot of fathers or biological fathers that have never had that modeled for them, so they don't really know. And having turned our back on the Lord, who is more than glad to teach you what a father is supposed to be like, we don't learn because we've turned our back on him as a nation. Read Ephesians 3, 14, and 15. Listen to what it says.

Okay, we'll take a look at that cable, and I appreciate your call today. Dad, we only have a couple minutes left. What would you personally do differently as a husband and as a father? You mentioned earlier that you haven't been a perfect father, a perfect husband. As you look back, what would you do differently? Well, as a Christian father, I think that the most important thing is rearing our children from the book of Proverbs.

I think as I look back, I would glue it to your foreheads somehow. I know in Proverbs, I think it's 620, it says something about, My son, observe the commandments of your father and do not forsake the teeth of your mother and bind them continually on your heart. And I think that the book of Proverbs, that's pure wisdom right there. And you have to show them by example even more how you love your wife and that you are a team together with her on discipline in the family and raising the children. You have to be an open book, you have to be an easy read, you have to be consistent, predictable, and understanding of where they mentally are at their various ages.

So, fathering along the line is different from a five-year-old than it is to a ten-year-old to a fifteen-year-old. I know John MacArthur, if I still have another 30 seconds here, had a list of things that father's advice to children. And I thought they were very good and if anybody wants to hear them again, I suppose on your website they can when they replay this message. But the first one he mentioned was to fear God, this is for the children.

Next one is guard your mind, obey your parents, select companions carefully, control your body, enjoy your marriage partner when you're married, watch your words about being lying or slander or pride, and pursue work diligently and manage your money and love your neighbor. Those are words by John MacArthur and I thought they were very well said. Well, they are very well said, dad. And I want to thank you so much for another wonderful year of coming on the program. I said at the beginning that you were a steady, practical servant, a family man, and a peacemaker.

Let me add a sixth of that. You're also an excellent radio guest as well. So on behalf of mom and the rest of our family, dad, we love you and we wish you a happy Father's Day. We're looking forward to spending it with you. Thank you, David. I hope you enjoyed this Father's Day weekend interview with my dad from back in 2010. If you missed any of it, you can go to our website, wellchristianrealview.org, to listen again. To be honest, I wasn't sure how I'd feel hearing my dad's voice after his heaven going in 2023.

He died unexpectedly and suddenly, probably in a matter of seconds, from a fatal heart rhythm while sitting in his chair at home one evening. In God's good providence, we never had the chance to say goodbye, but that is small disappointment as he showed and expressed his love for us and we express the same to him very frequently. And we know what the Bible says. 1 Thessalonians 4 says, We do not want you to be uninformed, brethren, about those who are asleep, those who have died, so that you will not grieve as do the rest who have no hope. For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so God will bring with him those who have fallen asleep or died in Jesus. For this we say to you by the word of the Lord, that we who are alive and remain until the coming of the Lord, his return, will not precede those who have fallen asleep. For the Lord himself will descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the trumpet of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. Then we who are alive and remain will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air, and so we shall always be with the Lord.

Verse 18, Therefore comfort one another with these words. These words, this truth, this promise, is the foundation of the believer's hope. But it's only for those who have obeyed Christ's command to repent and believe in the gospel, who can look forward to this promise. My dad would want me to tell you, if you have never put your faith in Christ as your Savior, do that today, right now.

Repent of your sin and put your trust in who Jesus Christ is, the sinless Son of God, and put your faith in his sacrifice of himself on the cross as payment for God's just penalty for your sin. If you'd like to find out more about that, give us a call or go to our website, thechristianrealview.org and click on the page, What Must I Do to Be Saved. Thank you for joining us this Father's Day weekend on The Christian Real View and for your support of this non-profit radio ministry. We ask that you pray for us as we head into the Overcomer Course for Young Adults this coming Friday, Saturday, June 21st and 22nd, that the Lord would work mightily in all of our hearts. Let's remember that Jesus Christ and his word are the same yesterday and today and forever, so until next time, think biblically, live accordingly, and stand firm. The Christian Real View is a listener-supported non-profit radio ministry furnished by the Overcomer Foundation. To make a donation, become a Christian Real View partner, order resources, subscribe to our free newsletter, or contact us, visit thechristianrealview.org, call 1-888-646-2233, or write to Box 401, Excelsior, Minnesota, 55331. That's Box 401, Excelsior, Minnesota, 55331. Thanks for listening to The Christian Real View.
Whisper: medium.en / 2024-06-15 04:41:40 / 2024-06-15 05:02:05 / 20

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