A Line In the Sand for Life 02-2-2019

Welcome to Hope for the Caregiver on American Family Radio. This is Peter Rosenberger bringing you three decades of experience to help you stay strong and healthy. As you take care of someone who is not, we are live. The phone lines are open 888-589-8840.

888-589-8840. If you want to be a part of the show, we've got a very busy show today, a lot to talk about. This is the nation's number one show for the family caregiver.

And we are thrilled that you're a part of it. Why do we need a show for caregivers? Well, there are more than 65 million Americans right now serving as a family caregiver. How do you help them?

What does that look like? I wrote an article that's out on American Family Association's website, their blog post, it's called The Stand. And I've been in quite a few articles out there and you could go out and see this.

And this article is called A Line in the Sand for Life. And I would encourage you to go out and read this article and see a little bit more about what we're going to talk about today. And you can share that with folks. And I would encourage you to do that.

Share it with your pastor, share it with as many people as you can. Because something happened in January that even though everybody's outraged about what happened in New York with late term abortions, what happened with the governor of Virginia, all these things that are going on. At the beginning of the month, Hawaii, their new law, which is our choice, our care started. And that's allowing for medically assisted death to folks who are terminal, have less than six months to live, so forth.

But then by the end of the month, we're applauding late term abortions. And we've got a governor that said the horrific things that he said. And you've all seen that all over the news. And you could read more about that and we won't go into that. I don't even know that I want to dignify a lot of what he said. But the concept is what I want to talk a little bit about this morning. Because we started off with the state saying, hey, if you're in so much pain and you're terminal and it doesn't look good, you know, this is the way it is, then it's okay for you to go ahead and check out.

And we'll give you some drugs to do it. And at the end of the month, New York is standing and applauding to say, hey, if you're bringing a baby all the way into the third trimester and then this governor went even further and they're going to allow people that are not even doctors to perform abortions. And it's based on the health of the mother. And they've already introduced concept of the mental health of the mother is at play as well. And I'm kind of wondering, hey, who is deciding the mental health of this mother? What does that look like if they're nonmedical personnel that are performing abortions?

Who's in charge of that? And then I had to ask the question of when this medically assisted death component, why six months? Why not seven months and 13 days? Why not eight months?

What's with the six month thing here? And I saw this theme of our country on geographical lens from Hawaii, literally to New York, the end to end of state governments, political leaders, elected politicians weighing into the whole quality and viability of life. And I thought this is not a good place for us as a country because when the government decides that they can step into this issue and start allowing death, permitting death, when has that ever worked when governments do that?

What government can you point to and say, wow, they really handled that issue responsibly? And that's what brings me to this conversation today because if people are listening to that while they're taking care of somebody who was deeply infirmed or severely disabled, what are they going to hear from these state legislators? And so I want to start off with a scripture of Job 2, 9 and Job's wife, and I'm reading this from the message, and Job's wife says, still holding onto your precious integrity, are you? Curse God and be done with it. And the King James says, curse God and die. And you can't help but see the parallel. Your suffering is so great.

Where is your God now is what his wife is saying. Go ahead and just die. Be done with it. Does that sound somewhat familiar to what you're hearing in the news? Does that sound somewhat familiar to what you're watching unfold?

Look, go ahead and just be done with it. I can't help but look at these things and wonder, okay, if caregivers are listening to elected officials saying that it's okay to pull the ripcord and just go ahead and check out, or if this child is born with some kind of deformity, as the governor of Virginia said, we'll put it aside and then we'll have a discussion. Well, what kind of deformity? And who is to decide which deformities are life worthy or not? And if we're listening to these elected officials versus listening to the word of God versus listening to life, what's going to happen to family members all across the country who are listening to this and watching this and they're taking care of a severely disabled child that is taxing them to the breaking point?

And if they're hearing those kinds of messages coming from elected politicians versus hearing believers speaking life into this, what do you think they're going to do? I wrote an article last year that made it into several papers and it's called Speaking Life into the Dark Thoughts of Family Caregivers. And it was prompted by a situation that happened in Tennessee about an hour outside of Nashville, my home, and a couple had a son with autism, he was nonverbal, five years old, and the husband beat this child to death.

The wife watched him do it. And then there was another situation in Oregon where a woman had a severely disabled child and she shot the child, killed the child, and then turned the gun on herself and was unsuccessful at taking her own life. And then there was a situation in Pennsylvania where a guy went to a fair with his wife with dementia and put a leash around her neck with a rope and a halter to keep her from wandering off.

At some point, did anybody intercept this guy or these individuals to give any kind of life to them, to speak any kind of reality to them, or did they think somehow this is a good idea? This isolation that happens with caregivers, you know, remember we've talked about this on the show. Caregivers suffer from three eyes. We lose our identity. We become, we lose our independence and we become isolated. And in that isolation, we have dark thoughts. And if those dark thoughts are only met with the stuff that's coming out of the news, where you've got elected politicians saying it's okay to have a discussion about a severely deformed child or disabled child, whatever that means, that it's okay to have a discussion about killing that child, what's going to happen to these family caregivers out there listening to that? 888-589-8840, 888-589-8840.

We're going to talk about that a little bit more. This is Peter Rosenberg. This is hope for the caregiver. Don't go away because there is hope for the caregiver. We'll be right back. Welcome back to the show for caregivers about caregivers hosted by a caregiver. This is Peter Rosenberg, bringing you three decades of experience to help you stay strong and healthy as you take care of someone who is not.

If you want to be a part of the show, this is 888-589-8840, 888-589-8840. I want to read a quote to you. And gradually, though no one remembers exactly how it happened, the unthinkable becomes tolerable and then acceptable and then legal and then applaudable. Johnny Erickson taught it. We saw the New York State Assembly applaud the unthinkable. And as if that wasn't enough, I mean, the ink wasn't even dry. And then this governor of Virginia said what he said, and the state legislature in Virginia said what she said.

And it was just, it was the matter of factness about it. I mean, I don't think they're even trying to disguise it anymore. Now it doesn't look like the governor of Virginia is going to survive this new charge of racism that's come out. That's between him and God, and I'm not going to, you know, not my circus, not my monkeys on that one. I just can tell you that when you do what he did, the gloves are off.

I mean, everybody's looking at it now for what it is. And my point on this show, for the caregiver is if you have someone who is taking care of a severely disabled child, and I have two family members doing that right now. One is taking care of a 30 year old daughter with cerebral palsy, who is basically like taking care of an 18 month old. And the other is taking care of a, I think 15 year old who has severe developmental and physical disabilities. These are family, my brother and sister-in-law, and then my cousin. They are strong believers, and they've been a source of encouragement to each other as well as others have been a source of encouragement to them in it.

And their lives are richer, while harder, but richer because of their journey. But if they're listening to state legislators, like these people that have been standing and applauding, if they're listening to this political agenda of saying it's okay to check out if you're terminal and you have less than six months, and it's okay to put the baby aside if it's got deformities, and then we'll have a discussion. All that happened within one month in our country, literally from coast to coast, from Hawaii to New York and Virginia.

That happened in one month. How do you, how do we as believers respond to this? Are we going to just continue to sit passively by? We are so, you know, I thank you Jim for playing Keith Green coming in.

I remember Keith Green had a song back in the early 80s. The world is dying in the dark, and I'm paraphrasing, but the church is asleep in the light. We've kind of been asleep at the switch, haven't we?

And now the veneer is off. They're not even being, trying to disguise it anymore. And if we don't speak life into people's circumstances, then who are they going to listen to? And so as caregivers, for those of you right now taking care of somebody who is struggling, first off we need to speak life to you, because you're the closest person to that individual. Whether it's a child with special needs, whether it's an aging parent, whether it's somebody with a traumatic issue, a terminal disease. I've done several conferences where I've spoken to families dealing with Huntington's disease. If you don't know what Huntington's disease is, look it up, but it's all the horrors of Lou Gehrig's, Alzheimer's, and Parkinson's wrapped up into one.

It's congenital, and it's fatal, and it is a horrible disease. If we're not grabbing a hold of folks who are caring for people in that, and speaking life to them, then what do they do? Who are they going to listen to?

Where are they going to go? This is why we do this show. This is what we're about here on this show, is to help caregivers find that path to safety.

What does solid ground look like? And if we don't help point fellow caregivers to that place, what's going to happen to them? People did that for me. People did that for me.

I would be a poor steward of that if I didn't offer it to others. Jim just sent me the text. I thank you for this. I'm going to read it.

This is Keith Green back in the, I think he wrote this in 1980, give or take. Do you see, do you see all the people sinking down? Don't you care?

Don't you care? Are you going to let them drown? How can you be so numb not to care if they come?

You close your eyes and pretend the job is done. Oh, bless me, Lord. Bless me, Lord. You know, that's all I ever hear. No one aches. No one hurts.

No one even sheds one tear. But he cries. He weeps. He bleeds. And he cares for your needs.

And you just lay back and keep soaking it down. Oh, can't you see such sin? Because he brings people to your door and you turn them away as you smile and say, God bless you. Be at peace. And all heaven just weeps because Jesus came to your door.

You left him out in the streets. If you get a chance, go out and the lyrics are just powerful of this song. Go out and download that song. And it is a phenomenal song that Keith Green wrote.

And it's an indictment against those of us who have been asleep at the switch. I'm going to read this quote again from Johnny. And gradually, though no one remembers exactly how it happened, the unthinkable becomes tolerable and then acceptable and then legal and then applaudable. Johnny Erickson-Tana. Gracie and Johnny, my wife Gracie and Johnny are close friends. And Gracie regularly records songs and just sends them to Johnny right now so she can listen to them on her phone. And while she's going through her second round of cancer and radiation treatment, Johnny's been in a wheelchair for 50 plus years as a quadriplegic.

Gracie has had 80 surgeries, both legs amputated and lives with relentless pain. What do you think the state legislators think of with these two women? I mean, I'll just let that kind of hang for a minute. What do you think that these people who stood and applauded in New York think of these two women? Or these folks in Hawaii that passed the Our Choice, Our Care Act? Do you think that the political agenda that is pushing for all this stuff will stop now? They've reached that line where they're okay, we're good. We need to just go ahead and stop. Do you think they're okay now?

Are they good? Who's next on their list? At some point, when are they going to come out and just with undisguised agenda and say, well, this kind of deformity, we don't need to pay for this. We need to just make them comfortable, let them die. We'll have a discussion as the governor of Virginia said, we'll just make the infant and by the way, he said infant.

He didn't say product of conception, tissue or fetus. He said the infant, we'll just make the infant comfortable and then we'll have a discussion. As a caregiver, you comfortable with that?

You comfortable with somebody saying, we'll just make your loved one comfortable and then we'll have a discussion about what we're going to do. If you think that this is not going in that direction, then you are misguided because that's exactly what the end game is and if we are not speaking the life of the gospel into this, to realize that suffering is not something to be avoided at all cost, it's something to be endured while trusting God through it. The goal is not to get through life pain free or scar free.

That's a stupid goal. That's not the goal and the goal is not to feel better about all these things. We're never going to feel better about it. Gracie doesn't have any legs. We were at the prosthesis this week where they were adjusted because it was kind of rubbing a little bit on it and caused a little sore on her left leg. It's painful for her. There's always something. Her body is broken.

She's had 80 plus surgeries that I can count. I'm never going to feel better about it. She's certainly never going to feel better about it, but that's not the goal. The goal is for us to be better through it. Not to just like Job's wife said, Job 2, 9.

I'll go ahead and read it again. Still holding on to your precious integrity, are you? Curse God and die. That can't be the goal. It's just to go ahead and be done with suffering and curse God and die.

Be done with it. And yet, that's what the world offers. That's what the world offers and they applaud those who do. That is not what the Gospel offers. And we have a Savior that understands our suffering who is acquainted with grief, acquainted with sorrow, acquainted with the kind of grief and sorrow you're dealing with.

The kind I'm dealing with. Never forget, we as believers are the bride of Christ and we are a wounded bride. And just like those of us taking care of a wounded bride like I do, I have a Savior that's acquainted with that. My Savior is in love with a wounded bride.

Hey, just like me. He understands. He gets this. Our Father in heaven understands your journey as a caregiver. And so I'm asking you, are you willing to trust Him in this? Not necessarily just say, you know, God, you got to fix this, then I'll trust you.

No, just trust Him no matter what. That's where life is. Run to this Savior. Do not listen to these people, these elected politicians who have no business, no business weighing into discussion about viability of life.

They are elected politicians. I don't care if this governor is a doctor or not. Not a doctor I would go to with my child.

888-589-8840. This is Hope for the Caregiver. Listen to her go. Goodness, that girl can sing. Welcome back to the show for caregivers about caregivers, hosted by a caregiver.

This is Hope for the Caregiver. And I am Peter Rosenberger and I am grateful you're with us. When I listen to her sing that with Jesus I can take it.

No matter what comes my way, I know that I can stand. That's a woman who stands on two prosthetic legs. What does she know about Jesus that the rest of us need to know? What does she see? What has she experienced that you and I need to see and do?

I want to read just a, we had a caller here, but he, it was a very emotional time for him and he was a little bit afraid of coming on the air. So his grandson is autistic and nonverbal. What does he tell son to keep their spirits up and that there is light at the end of the tunnel? I don't know how old the son is. Oh, this is the son.

Wait a minute. Let me see if I can get this right. I think, what does he tell his son in caring for his grandson? When you have a child like this, and I do not have a child that is autistic or nonverbal, but I do have family members with children who are nonverbal. And when you have a situation like this where you're pouring into this child and the child is not able to respond or able to properly engage, uh, like you would like them to, you're, you're doing actually at that point, if I may, you are modeling our father's love for us because think about it.

There is no way we can reciprocate to God the way he loves us. I remember one time when our oldest son, Parker, was playing on the playground in preschool. He's about three years old and he fell and cut his chin. And I took him to the doctor and they're going to have to sew him up. And I held him down while they numbed him up and then they sewed his chin up. And Parker was just terrified.

Um, just screaming and terrified. And I held him down and I, and he looked up in my eyes and it was just these, these, this look of betrayal. Like I had somehow just done the most horrible thing to him. And then there was no way I could explain to him the nature of sutures and stitches and infection and all those kinds of things.

There's no way, there was no way he was going to understand that. And I found myself saying over and over to my son, it's going to be okay. Daddy's here. Daddy's here. Daddy's here.

Daddy's here. And after it was over, I held him, wiped his tears and he was able to move on past it. For him, it seemed like an eternity and a horrific experience.

For me, it was heartbreaking to watch him. But how much more so does our heavenly father do this? So to Edward who called in about your grandson and your son evidently, I would say to you, to your son and to your grandson, the same things that our heavenly father says to us, it's going to be okay. Daddy's here. Daddy's here.

Daddy's here. If you look through scripture, all through scripture, you will see that same theme woven throughout all of scripture. You will see fear not, fear not, fear not, fear not. I am with you. I am with you.

I am with you. This is the message that we as caregivers need to hear so that we can not only function in a healthy manner ourselves, but then better pour that into our loved ones as they are terrified. My son was terrified.

There was no way he could process it. If you have a child who's nonverbal with autism, they're not going to process things the normal way. And we as caregivers have to deal with that, have to watch it. And it's unpleasant. It's heartbreaking at times.

But if you remember those words over and over, daddy's here. Your father, your heavenly father sees this. He is not without compassion.

Go look at Lamentations 3.33. He is not without compassion in this. He is not doing this willy-nilly. He is not just leaving you hanging out to dry and wringing his hands wondering, oh goodness, what are we going to do about this?

That's not the way this is happening. He is walking you through this process. And in the journey, you're seeing a little bit more of his heart. At the cross, justification happened instantly. The moment Jesus said it's finished, it was done. And we were justified in Christ. When we arrive in heaven, that moment of glorification is going to happen instantly.

It just, and we step into glory. But in this life, we go through what is called sanctification. And there's nothing quite like suffering to illustrate sanctification. And suffering comes in all kinds of packages. It comes in autism. It comes in chronic pain. It comes in surgeries. It comes in amputation.

It comes in quadriplegia. It comes in watching these things. And there's nothing like going through this for any length of time to expose the things in your heart, in our hearts, in my heart.

I wrote an article about this. I said there's nothing like caring for somebody with severe disabilities for a couple of decades to expose the funkiness that's in your own heart. And that's what God is interested in doing. So to Edward, I understand the emotion that you're feeling with it and the helplessness and the frustration and how do you encourage your son as he takes care of your nonverbal grandson? And I would start with saying to your son, because you are here, you can model your Heavenly Father and just say to your son, Daddy's here.

Your presence is important. And as you communicate that to your son, he will then be strengthened to be able to communicate that to his son with autism. That's the way this works. And that's how we're going to push back against all this wickedness that is coming out in every headline, every newsflash today that says basically curse God and die. And we're not going to say that. We're going to say praise God and live. And we can weep as we do this. And we will weep. But they don't have to be tears of rage or despair.

They can be tears, healthy tears. And that's the goal here is that we will join with, as Paul says in Romans, the Holy Spirit is groaning. All creation is groaning. Because this is not done. This is not over.

And it's being made new. And so if we try to have some kind of utopia here on earth, we're just delusional. It's not going to happen. That's what the world thinks that can happen. If we could just go ahead and get rid of all the undesirable children that we don't want to have or the undesirable infirmed people that we don't want to deal with. And they cloak it all in, well, we're just being compassionate. Or as President Obama said, he didn't want his daughters to be punished for a mistake by having a child. This is what they think.

Now they're not even trying to be coy about it. If we can redirect our eyes, lift up your heads and recognize that we have a Savior who gets all this, who's making all this new and will never abandon us in it. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death. And if you're a caregiver, you understand the valley of the shadow of death. I have faced death with my wife too many times.

I've saved her life. It's a traumatic thing to look at death. Imagine having to look at it without the presence of your Savior.

888-589-8840, 888-589-8840 because he didn't just look at it, he bore it. He took it upon himself and he defeated it. So yes, we will go through these things on this earth. There will be things that we will endure that will be painful. That is not a message that sells real well in a lot of places. Sadly, even on Christian media. But there is a sanctification going on here. And if I can quote another Keith Green song, I want to, I need to be more like Jesus. That's another one of his wonderful songs that he did and that's the sanctification process of us learning to have these things stripped away and be willing to allow God to expose these things in our life, these fears, this resentment, this anger, the despair, all these things in our life and bring all of that to the cross. It is not easy. It is not pretty. But it is the only way for life.

I want to read this quote from A. W. Tozer. Modern Christians hope to save the world by being like it. Now think about that. Think about all the folks that you see and a lot of the ministries you see out there in the world and so forth. And it's hard to tell which ones Christian, which ones secular.

They're all starting to look alike. Tozer said, but it'll never work. The church's power over the world springs out of her unlikeness to it, never from her integration to it. We are able to triumph over this because we are unlike this. We will never triumph if we try to integrate ourselves into it. Elected politicians in the United States of America are applauding the unthinkable, applauding the unthinkable. And they're telling us basically no different than what Job's wife said, curse God and die. Go ahead and be done with it.

But the church says no. We stand and applaud the one who conquered this. This is Hope for the Caregiver. We'll be right back. 888-589-8840.

Hey this is Peter Rosenberger. Have you ever helped somebody walk for the first time? I've had that privilege many times through our organization Standing with Hope. When my wife Gracie gave up both of her legs following this horrible wreck that she had as a teenager and she tried to save them for years and it just wouldn't work out and finally she relinquished them and thought, wow, this is it. I mean, I don't have any legs anymore.

What can God do with that? And then she had this vision for using prosthetic limbs as a means of sharing the gospel to put legs on her fellow amputees. And that's what we've been doing now since 2005 with Standing with Hope. We work in the West African country of Ghana and you can be a part of that through supplies, through supporting team members, through supporting the work that we're doing over there.

You could designate a limb. There's all kinds of ways that you could be a part of giving the gift that keeps on walking at standingwithhope.com. Would you take a moment to go out to standingwithhope.com and see how you can give.

They go walking and leaping and praising God. You could be a part of that at standingwithhope.com. I'm Peter Rosenberger and this is your caregiver minute. Noise bombards us every day from 24 hour cable news to traffic to our mobile devices. We are inundated with a wall of noise that seemed to keep so many of us in a state of agitation. For caregivers, taking a moment to sit quietly and settle our hearts down seems nearly impossible, but it's critical for us to do just that. You see, if we don't take time for stillness, we're going to have to make time for illness. That constant state of anxiety, stress, and sensory overload we experience as caregivers will eventually make us sick.

Stress kills. The way we push back on this is to carve out some time where we can just be still and quiet. Prayer, meditation, or just clearing our frenetic thoughts, it all helps reboot our minds and hearts and allows us to be a little calmer in the caregiver storm we navigate. This has been your caregiver minute with Peter Rosenberger brought to you by Standing with Hope, a ministry for the wounded and those who care for them. There's more information at standingwithhope.com. Welcome back to the show for caregivers, about caregivers. Hosted by a caregiver, I am Peter Rosenberger bringing you three decades of experience, most of them through failure because I am the crash test dummy of caregivers. To help you, though, stay strong and healthy as you take care of someone who is not. If you want to be a part of the show, 888-589-8840.

888-589-8840. Thank you for playing that gym. That was Gracie again on that Keith Green tune, I Want to Be More Like Jesus. My weakness is revealed, but by his stripes I'm healed. A little kid once saw Gracie and asked her, where are your legs? Because she had robotic legs on and the kid was kind of fascinated by it. The kid was actually following her around the grocery store and she was kind of not looking at the kid, but the kid just kept, this little girl, she just kept following her around and she finally went up to her and she said, you know, are your legs in heaven? And Gracie looked at her and she just kind of stopped. She said, why, yes they are. And when I get there, I'm going to get them back. And I thought, that's, you know, that's a pretty good answer.

I just thought that was a very good answer. And for a season, and that season may be this entire life that we live, Gracie's been disabled since she was 17. I won't tell you how old she is right now, but she has two grandchildren.

She doesn't look like a grandmother, but she is. And those legs are going to be waiting for her along with the glorified body that has no scars. Those of you right now who are struggling, caring for someone and you're watching this thing unfold, and it is heartbreaking.

I would say this to you. My wife's scars are extensive and deep, but they're not permanent. Our Savior's scars are extensive and deep, but they are permanent. And those are the scars on His hands, His feet, His side. And those scars mean something for all eternity.

And that's what gives us hope, to know that somehow this thing is, He has this thing working in ways that we just cannot even process. And we slip our scared hand into His scarred hand. And that's how we do it. Actually, it's more like He grasps our scared hand with His scarred hands. He reaches into our dumpster fires with His scarred hands.

And that's how it's done. Let me go real quick to, I'll try to squeeze in a few things here for the end of the hour. Let me go real quick to, I think it was, Alan, we lost it, but they were asked if I was aware of Dale Evans Rogers' book, Angels Underwear. Yes. Alan didn't want to go on the air with you this morning, Peter. She just wanted to ask. Okay. Well, in that case, and I'm used to that, by the way, Jim.

People just don't want to go on the air with me. But yes, I did know that book and Dale Evans and Roy Rogers. And I would recommend it. I guess it's still in print. But I think they were talking about their child with Down syndrome.

And you can only imagine what elected politicians now from the left are saying about Down syndrome. Yeah. Hey, Peter, we also had a couple of calls asking about your book. And you haven't told us where to get that today. Oh, sorry about that. I get kind of wrapped up in what I'm doing.

I forget that I have to talk about that. So my book is called Hope for the Caregiver. And it's available wherever books are sold. There's an audiobook that costs less than a combo meal at a fast food place that you can get and just as you're driving back and forth to the doctor's office, download it, listen to the audiobook. It's Hope for the Caregiver, the print Kindle version, all that stuff.

And then also have seven caregiver landmines and how you can avoid them. And I'm almost finished with that audio book. And I've got to do that.

But that's available digitally or in print. And also you can, through any of the dot coms like Amazon or iTunes or whatever, you can stream my CD called Songs for the Caregiver. Half of it is just piano solos that I'm doing, instrumental stuff of hymns that you're going to love. And I've been a pianist since I was five years old. And then the other half is Gracie singing. And when you hear her sing, particularly Bomb and Gilead, oh my goodness, it'll just, it's heartbreaking.

It's so beautiful. And so anyway, all right, let me see if I can grab a little bit more on the calls here. Daniel in Kansas. Daniel, good morning. How are you feeling? I'm doing fine. Thank you. And I appreciate your show, sir. Say, I had a question.

Yeah. I was out playing my drum and listening and listening and I thought, I did have a question. I was a former laborer.

I do drywall work and I was repairing some drywall on dialysis clinic just this week. And I was bringing my materials in through the door and there was a lady there, I assume she just got through the dialysis, waiting for someone to pick her up. And I just wondered, I just felt like she'd been there quite a while, waiting, waiting. And I thought, what can I do in a situation like that?

What would I say to a person like that to, you know, kind of console her or something? It just struck me that she was really suffering, you know, and the door was opening. Right. And it was those cold days.

We had some cold in Kansas too. And it was one of those sliding doors, you know, that opens every time someone comes in and out and a blast of cold air come in, but she had to be close to there to see out the window so they could, I guess whoever was picking up could see that she was ready. And no relation to her at all. Is it something, is it appropriate for me to like sit with her for a while and talk to her or say something?

I think it's always appropriate to be, I think it's always, first off, thank you for noticing her. And the other thing is it's a little early in the morning for you to be out practicing your drum, isn't it? Yeah.

Well, did the neighbors have anything to say about that? Well, it's yeah, not too, not too bad. Yeah. It's pretty muffled where I practice. Yeah. Okay. It's not a real loud drum. It's a, it's an Irish frame drum called a bowron.

It's a Celtic instrument, so it's not too loud. All right. So you're not, you're not out there just wailing on these things, huh? Right. No, not like that.

You're not on a drum kit, just Neil Perkins thing. All right. I think it's always appropriate to say something and to be kind and just say, how are you feeling? You know, I think that is a, that is a great question to open up.

That's what I do for every call that calls in here. How are you feeling? It's amazing how many caregivers get caught with that question because they're not used to answering it.

But I think that's an important question. How are you feeling? You okay? And, and start off with that and said, is there, can I help you with anything? Can I, can I flag your ride down or do you need some help getting through the door?

All those kinds of things. One of the things I, I like it to be in a caregiver to this, Daniel, and I really do appreciate your, your heart on this. It's like going to the post office and you're carrying a bunch of boxes and, and somebody says, you know, brother, you look to be burdened down.

I'll pray for you. Well, hold the door while you're doing it. You know, because I think that's the thing. We, we, we lose sight of the fact that we can do something practical right then.

This woman was by the door and it was cold and you noticed that and maybe, you know, that's okay to just go and say, hey, look, can I help watch for your car so you don't have to be in the cold? Anything like that. Those are, those are meaningful things. That's how the battle is won.

It's not one with these great conquest of somehow we got to go out and do something spectacular and then we get, it goes viral on, on Twitter about it. I think it's just, just being considered and kind to someone who is struggling. Maybe she just lonely and maybe she just needed a kind word. I've had situations like that when I was so discouraged and there were people that would just out of the blue, just would just give a kind word. And I can't tell you how meaningful that is.

And the same thing with Gracie as well. And, um, you know, we don't need to just try to just blow past them and ignore them. So thank you for that, uh, for, for thinking about that and, and for looking at that. And, and now tell me what kind of drum are you playing again? Uh, it's called the Balran. It's a, it's a, it's shaped in a circle. It's a Celtic or Celtic instrument. It's a, it's a, it's also pronounced Buran or, or moron, but Balran is a, and it's just got a goatskin stretched over it. And it's only about four inches deep, maybe about 16 inches in diameter. And you play it with your hand or you play it with, it's called a stick or a tip or two.

You can play it either way. And it's just used to keep rhythm, you know, to the, the jigs and the reels that are typical to Irish, fast jigs and reels that are typical to Irish music, you know? So, you know, yeah. You know, Rosenberger's an Irish name. My great, great grandfather, Seamus O'Rosenberger. No, it's not Irish.

Seamus O'Rosenberger. Um, well, I think that, I think that's just fascinating. And, um, uh, um, um, that's a very interesting thing for you to be doing early on a Saturday morning.

I just want to play on my trombone. Well, I was playing and listening. That just struck me as funny, Daniel. I'm sorry. That just struck me as funny.

Well, I, I turned it down kind of low, but I can hear it in my right ear while I'm playing, you know, sitting in a small, a small stool. I listened to the radio and, um, I've been listening to you for three weeks now. And I thought, gee, I should call it.

Cause I did have this situation where, and those are really good opening lines. Thank you for that. How are you feeling? That's a great way to start off.

Okay. Hey, listen, thanks so much for the call, Daniel. And thanks for listening.

And, uh, now go back to your drums now. And, uh, listen, this is Hope For The Caregiver. You can see more at HopeForTheCaregiver.com. I'll put out the podcast a little bit later and thank you for being a part of this show.

We'll see you next week. The views and opinions expressed in this broadcast may not necessarily reflect those of the American Family Association or American Family Radio.