As a Caregiver, Do You Respect YOUR OWN Trauma?

Looking for that perfect Christmas gift for the family? Why not a chicken? Stick a bow on top, put the chicken under the tree, and who knows, you may even have a couple eggs to fry up for breakfast Christmas morning.

Give the gift that keeps on clucking. A chicken. Okay, maybe it's not the perfect gift for your family, but it is the perfect gift for a poor family in Asia. A chicken can break the cycle of poverty for a poor family. Yes, a chicken.

A chicken's eggs provide food and nourishment for a family, and they can sell those eggs at the market for income. When you donate a chicken or any other animal through Gospel for Asia, 100% of what you give goes to the field. And the best gift of all, when Gospel for Asia gives a poor family an animal, it opens the door to the love of Jesus. So give the perfect gift for a family in Asia this Christmas. Give them a chicken.

Call 866-WINASIA or to see chickens and other animals to donate, go to crittercampaign.org Welcome to Hope for the Caregiver here on American Family Radio. This is Peter Rosenberger. This is the nation's number one show for you as a family caregiver.

For those of you who are knowingly, willingly, voluntarily putting yourself and exhaustingly putting yourself between a vulnerable loved one and even worse, disaster. Maybe your loved one is aging. Maybe you've got a special needs kid. Maybe you've got somebody who deals with trauma.

That's what my wife deals with. I'm in my 35th year as a caregiver. I'm bringing a lot of experience. Most of it learned the hard way to the table here to help you and I discuss ways that we can get to safety where we can catch our breath, take a knee if we have to, and then develop healthier strategies to live a calmer, healthier, and dare I say it, a more joyful life. While dealing with often very tough, tough circumstances, we are a unique show and we are way out in front of this leading the pack. We're very grateful to American Family Radio for seeing the value of what we do here. I also want to thank the Truth Network and His Radio Network and Upstate South Carolina, Truth Network based out of North Carolina, all these other stations that are carrying this show because they see the value of what is happening to family members and to families in general that are dealing and wrestling with these tough issues. You can go out to our website, hopeforthecaregiver.com, and see more of our past shows. If this is your first time ever listening to the show, you can stream along with us at Hope for the Caregiver on Facebook Live on our Facebook group. We have a Hope for the Caregiver group. Last week on our podcast, we did a broadcast and a podcast.

Both of these are the number one of their kind in the world. There's no other broadcast that's larger than this. Aren't you glad that a show that points to the gospel is taking leadership in this?

Do you ever feel like we as Christians are playing defense all the time while the world co-ops all these issues that are affecting families? But not here, not on this topic, not on this show. We're leading the charge on this. Our podcast is also the largest one in the world.

We delve into all kinds of subjects. We had a great conversation last week with a father and son. The son has Down Syndrome.

He's 42 years old. This is Down Syndrome Awareness Month. So we get into everything here. We deal with alcoholism and addiction.

And that is highly unusual. A lot of people don't think of caregivers as family members of alcoholics or addicts, but we do because we understand wherever there's a chronic impairment, there's a caregiver. And I've learned to speak fluent caregiver.

That's what I do here on this show. But the better news is that, the greatest news is that caregiver is the language spoken by our Savior. That's his native tongue. That's who our Savior is, is the ultimate caregiver for a wounded bride. And that brings me great comfort as I take care of my own wounded bride. I realize that my Savior, my Lord, is in love with a wounded bride.

The church is called the Bride of Christ. And think about it. And that's what gives me great hope and courage and strength and comfort.

And we're just glad that you're here. We're going to get into some topics today, but I'm going to start off with a trivia question that is related to what we do. Now, I know you like trivia. Now, no Googling, okay? No Googling. If you know the answer, you can call this in, but there's a scripture, John chapter 5, no Googling. Well, I can't stop you from doing it. If you're going to cheat, you're going to cheat, but you and Jesus will know.

I'm just kidding. Jesus, there was a sheep gate. By the sheep gate, there was a pool, which in Hebrew is called what?

And it had five porticos, and in these lay a multitude of were sick, blind, lame, and withered. And they were waiting for the moving of the waters. There was a legend that an angel of the Lord went down at certain times into the pool and stirred up the water.

And whoever was first got into the water after the stirring of it was made well. And if you look in John chapter 5, verse 5, it says a man was there who had been there, been ill for 38 years. And verse 6 says, when Jesus saw him lying there and knew that he'd already been there a long time in that condition, he said to him, do you wish to get well?

The sick man answered, sir, I have no one to put me in the pool when the water stirred. But while I'm coming, others stepped in before me. And he never even answered Jesus' question. And then Jesus said, pick up, get up, pick up your pallet and walk.

And immediately the man became well and picked up his pallet and began to walk. But the point I want to make on that with Scripture is it said he'd been there 38 years. Scripture was very specific on that, 38 years. And then went on to add he'd been there a long time.

Scripture understood, under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit, John wrote that and valued how long that man had been there and gave respect to the illness, to the trauma. And that's what we're going to talk about today. But if you know the answer to the name of that pool, what it was called, give us a call. 888-589-8840. 888-589-8840. Now, remember, the calls that we get here are for family caregivers. So if your seminary student wanted to show off your knowledge, give a caregiver a chance. OK, give a caregiver a chance to be able to share that.

But 888-589-8840. We'd love to hear from you. Again, the show is for the family caregiver and those folks often get lost into someone else's story. And this show is all about helping family caregivers find their own voice and understand just how dearly loved they are by their Savior. And we'd love to have you be a part of the show today.

888-589-8840. Respecting the trauma. Respecting the trauma is what we're going to talk about today, because so many of us live with trauma, not just our loved ones, but the trauma ourselves of being a caregiver. Do you understand how much trauma you're enduring as a caregiver? Do you understand what it's doing to you?

And are you respecting it? I had knee surgery this week. I have torn meniscus in my left knee and it's been bothering me. It got to be pretty uncomfortable. In fact, it was hard to even sit and do the show. And I went to my orthopedic surgeon and I said, What happened?

I don't remember doing anything in particular. And evidently the consensus was that I turned 57. And I guess that's what happens.

But they went in there and fixed it. But a lot of caregivers don't do these things. They won't take care of their own medical needs. 72% of caregivers don't even see their own doctor.

That's one of the landmines in my book, Seven Caregiver Landmines and How You Can Avoid Them. And it's seen to your own medical needs. And I knew that if my knee did not get, it was not going to get better on its own, that I had to take steps with it. So I had to get it fixed. And the nurse, it was a friend of ours, and they called and checked on me regularly and said, Now look, let the pain be your guide.

Don't overdo what your body can't do. And basically respect the trauma. And I look at this passage in scripture where it says this man had been there for 38 years and then went on to repeat, It was a long time. Jesus knew he'd been there a long time. My wife was hurt 37 years ago next month when she had her car wrecked.

This was before I knew her. And, you know, it gives me great comfort and guidance and insight and clarity and wisdom to know that scripture is affirming respect the trauma. Some people have been hurt for 38 minutes. But this guy had been there for 38 years.

And scripture recognized that. And so I want to ask you today, are you respecting the trauma that you're dealing with as a caregiver? Do you understand what this is doing to you?

That's why I ask every caller, no matter who calls into this show, and if you got the right answer, I see the board is lit up with people who got the trivia answers. But no matter who calls in, I'm going to ask you, how are you feeling? How are you doing? And are you respecting the trauma that being a caregiver is costing you? What it's doing to you?

What it does to your wallet, to your heart, to your body, to your job, to your relationships, to your soul? Do you respect the trauma? 888-589-8840. 888-589-8840. This is Peter Rosenberger. This is Hope for the Caregiver.

Healthy caregivers make better caregivers. That's what we're on the path to do today. We'll be right back. This is a hymn that I love. Every hour I need thee. Oh, bless me, Lord. Bless me, my Savior. I come to thee. Do you know that hymn?

I put this on my CD. Bless me now, my Savior. I come to thee. You know, I put I need thee every hour. And I did this because there's not a hymn that says I need thee every minute. Maybe I need to write that because this is the point of respect to the trauma of understanding how much we need thee every hour we need thee.

And I love that hymn. So thank you for letting me start off the comeback from the break playing on that. I've got a keyboard set up here in my studio and I just I love being able to just stop and just play for a minute. And sometimes I like to just be able to play for you as a caregiver, as my fellow caregiver. And we'll play Gracie's music and so forth.

And I like that's how one of the ways that I respect the trauma of my own life and of Gracie's life is that we use music to soothe it. If you remember, David used to play for King Saul when King Saul would be going crazy. I mean, the madness went on King Saul and David would sit down and play. And it would it would calm him down most of the time.

One time David saw through a spear at him. But anyway, so. All right, let's see. I'm going to go and Carlos in Tennessee. Carlos, good morning. How are you feeling, Carlos? Good morning. I'm well, thank you for asking. How are you, Mr. Peter? Well, you know, for a man of my age and limited abilities, I think I'm doing OK. You got my answer?

What was the name of the pool? Well, well, respect to the fact that I'm not a caregiver. And I could tell the end of the the reason for calling you wanted caregivers. I'll decline to answer.

I know the answer, but I'll decline to answer. No, you go ahead. I'm just glad to meet you, Carlos. I'm glad to meet you. You go ahead and tell me, because here's the deal, Carlos. Here's the deal. If you love somebody, you're going to be a caregiver.

If you live long enough, you're going to need one. So no matter what happens, you're going to be involved in this show at some point. So I'm just glad to meet you and glad that you're out there. Thank you.

Thank you. It is the Pool of Shalom. Yes, it also called. It was also called. I don't know the Hebrew name.

Well, we named a hospital after it here in the United States, the Naval Hospital after it. So that's Bethesda. There it is. And so Jesus respected that.

You know, I love that. You know, and it was my friend Johnny Erickson Tada pointed that out to me when she was reflecting on this. Now, she's been in quadriplegia now. She's been dealing with this for over 50 years. But when it when she hit that 38 year mark, she pointed that scripture out that said, you know, he'd been ill for a long time, for 38 years.

And then scripture said it. And he'd been there a long time and recognize how long that had been in respect to the trauma. And I know, Carlos, whatever life you've lived at this point, you've had trauma in your life, haven't you?

Yes, sir. And you got to respect the trauma. What is what's something you do to respect the trauma? Well, what I do, I think this is my second time calling in on your show, Mr. Peter.

Well, thank you. There is a co-worker of mine who who is a caretaker. And and I always, you know, want to encourage her, encourage her, ask her how she's doing. So as respect to trauma and the things she's dealing with, I want her to know and be aware that, you know, I'm thinking about you.

You know, your your health and your well-being matters just as much as the person you're caring for. And so that's how I kind of address the trauma. Well, how do you address your own trauma? Oh, through the Lord, first and foremost, brother.

I know that sounds sort of cliche-ish, but no, that's actually what I do. You know, I take my cares to him first and foremost. And then, you know, he'll guide me through the Holy Spirit to those who can, you know, help direct me even further.

But yes, first and foremost is always to the Lord, because I'm married, been married for 19 years, wonderful wife. And, you know, sometimes that when I'm having issues or trauma with her, you know, I can stay can create some trouble. But believe it or not, I just say, Lord, are you are you saying that are you saying that marriage can create some trauma? Is that what you're telling me, Carlos? Yes.

Yes. At least for me it can, Peter. At least for me it can. Or it has.

It has. And I understand that, you know what, you know, it's not a perfect union and we're going to have ebbs and flow in the relationship. And that's the beautiful part of it. But, you know, I said, Lord, she's her daughter, she's your child. And if you don't tell me how to deal with this, you know, whatever the situation would be. As a matter of fact, my wife did have she does have some health conditions. So I guess in that respect, I am a caregiver.

Yes, you are. And then she has rheumatoid arthritis. And, you know, I've been with her since, you know, she I didn't know what lupus was. She told me about it really quick.

And then she asked me a question when I was when I proposed before I proposed to her, we were courting. And she said, you still want me with all this mess? And I just told her God didn't show me no mess because I believe that the Holy Spirit would have been able to tell me this is something you're not going to be able to deal with. You know, but thank God he told me I didn't see no mess in her. You know, this is the question we asked our Savior. You still want us with all this mess? And our Savior always says, yes, I do. And so that's your model.

Well, I want you to do something for me, Carlos. Would you do this woman that you work with that's a caregiver that, you know, you ask about her. Next time you talk to her, ask her about her car. Ask her if her car is everything is working on her car.

OK, our tires, do they need to be rotated and balanced? She had an oil change lately. Anything like that, if she's having to do a lot of these things by herself, just ask her, is everything OK with your car? You know, can I run it by the service station for you and get the oil changed? Or something like that just to make sure her car is running. Sometimes something that simple can be a way that brings such a huge help to a caregiver. And that's a great way, and does it cost really anything, you know, if there's something big, mechanical wrong with it, it's not your responsibility to pay for it.

But ask about it to make sure she's driving safely on the road back and forth to doctors or whatever she's doing. And that's a great way to serve. And Carlos, it just makes me, I'm just grateful that you're in the audience. So thank you for listening, thank you for calling in, thank you for getting that answer, OK? OK, you're welcome, brother. God bless you.

Thank you. You too, and I'm going to go to Ernie in Mississippi. Ernie, good morning. How are you feeling? Well, we lost Ernie in Michigan, I guess.

Sorry about that. Well, we lost Ernie, so let's go to Ruby in Mississippi. Ruby, good morning, Ruby. How are you feeling? How are you feeling, Ruby? I'm doing OK. I'm not a caregiver as far as in my house, but I work as a caregiver with the elderly. Yes, sir. Well, how are you doing with that?

Someday it's not good. How are you doing? Do you do this at a facility or do you do this at a home? I go to the homes.

I go out in the field and various ones and, you know, take care of them. Yes, sir. How are you doing with the...

Yes, they can. And how are you doing with the COVID-19? You know what? I don't let that scare me. I'm just... I'm not going to be homebound with that. I just, you know, I just go forth and just... Well, we got to... You know, we got to be smart about it. We don't want to be reckless. But at the same time, we got to learn to live with this thing.

We can't just hole up and live in a basement somewhere. And my wife had it. I was diagnosed positive with it, but I didn't really get... I had a cough, but I work around horses and a lot of hay and so... And I get a cough every year and I've done that for 10 years.

So I couldn't tell whether it was hay fever or it was corona. And they asked me, they said, well, are you tired? I said, I've been a caregiver for 35 years. They said, well, do you have headaches? I said, I've been a caregiver for 35 years. Are you irritable? I've been a caregiver for 35 years.

You know, so what is it, corona or caregiver? But evidently I have the antibodies, so I donated plasma. And have you been diagnosed positive with this at all yet? No, sir. I haven't been tested and I really hadn't had any symptoms. I heard you speak about your wife having it. But no, sir, I haven't.

See, I had to earn a paycheck, so I'm glad I'm not sick, but I keep on working. Well, I had the plasma and I had the company that's a nationwide company that does the convalescent plasma. You've heard of that. And where you can, they'll take your plasma and then they'll use that to help, because I've got the antibodies for the coronavirus now in my blood, and they'll use that to help others. So I had the communications manager for the entire company that was on the podcast and I asked him, I said, now look, can you track my plasma and see who got it?

Because if it went to the president, I'd like to know. Because I'd like to hear the president say, I got Peter's plasma. It was the best plasma ever. The other plasma's losers.

You're terrible. This was the best plasma. There's been no other plasma that's been like this. It's the most fantastic plasma ever created. It's beautiful. It's fabulous.

It's great. And we're going to be winning with more and more of Peter's plasma. That's what I was hoping to hear. You're a comedian.

She said, we can't track where your plasma went, and that's probably a good thing. Don't you think, Ruby? No, you're a pretty good person and a musician.

No, sir. Well, well, you're very gracious. You're very gracious on that. And I appreciate you calling. I appreciate what you do. Now, look, I want you to be safe.

Use common sense. And just do you pray over your patients even quietly just by yourself? Do you just pray over them when you go to their homes and stuff? In the morning when I read first and I pray, I pray for everybody. Yes, sir.

Good. Do that and then pray for yourself as you do it. And we're going to continue to pray the Lord will protect you. You glove up.

You mask up. You do all the things you're supposed to do. And you care for these folks. And I thank you for what you do. I've got folks that have done that for my wife and me.

Not as much me, but for my wife and then for my parents. And I appreciate the risk. And I appreciate the heart that you're doing. Just common sense, Ruby. You know they train you.

Common sense. Yes. Hey, and tell your wife I love her singing, okay? Oh, well, thank you.

I will. I love her singing too. That's one of the ways that she respects her own trauma is that she sings and it allows her spirit to just be free. I know what you mean.

I tell her often when she sings, she's not broken. Right. And I love that.

And I think that's just the promise of what's coming for us one day when we're in his presence. Amen. Ruby, you're a delight. Thank you for calling. Thank you for being a part of this show. And we got to go to a break, but this is Hope for the Caregiver. This is Peter Rosenberger. We'll be right back. Welcome back to Hope for the Caregiver. This is Peter Rosenberger. This is the nation's number one show for you as a family caregiver.

888-589-8840, 888-589-8840 if you want to be a part of the show. And we're talking today about respecting the trauma. Respect the trauma.

What does that look like to you? And do you take time to do the things that are necessary to care for yourself? And I see some comments here on our Facebook page. You can follow along on Hope for the Caregiver on Facebook. We stream the show live, then we put the podcast out.

You can go out to Hopeforthecaregiver.com. And Ruby was so nice a minute ago to reference Gracie's singing. And you can also get a copy of Gracie's CD and my CD. But my CD, you can download wherever CDs can be streamed or downloaded. Or if you want to get the physical copy, you can go out to our website. I'll show you how to do it.

It's very easy to do. And Gracie's, we have a special offer that if you help support what we're doing, there's a donate button right there at Hopeforthecaregiver.com. We'll send you a copy. Whatever's on your heart, we'll send you a copy of it. And you'll love it. Gracie's CD is extraordinary.

It's called Resilient, and she is indeed resilient. Mine is called Songs for the Caregiver. And half of it's instrumentals that I'll just play, some hymns that mean something to me. And I get Gracie to sing a few songs.

I've got some friends singing some things with it. And I think you'll find it very meaningful. I'll put it on there just to kind of steal the heart of a caregiver. I see some comments that some caregivers can't take care of themselves.

Yes, they can. It may not be everything we want, but that doesn't mean we can't do something. We have to do something to care for ourselves. We are not doing ourselves or our loved ones a favor if we don't. And we may not be able to have the surgery that we want to have at the time we want to have it. We may not be able to do certain things.

You know, I should have had this surgery on my knee a little bit earlier, but I got to do what I got to do. But if I can't walk, I can't care. If I can't care, then this whole thing falls apart. And if we're not being careful with ourselves and respecting the trauma that we deal with physically and emotionally. So what about our diet? Do you respect the trauma that you live with as a caregiver by changing the way you eat?

Now, I know I've gone, I just swerved from preaching to meddling. But part of that is we've got to ask ourselves, what are we putting in our body? Does it contribute to cholesterol? Does it contribute to blood pressure?

Does it contribute to weight gain? Does it contribute to all these things that could hurt us? And can we back off on some of these things?

I'm not asking you to just go stark raving mad on this thing. I'm just asking you, can we start making incremental changes in the way we eat? Do we pick up a sugary drink? Or do we drink more water?

Do we drink enough water? Do we respect the trauma of what's going on in our body by taking care of our body? Do we respect the trauma of what's going on in our soul by learning to be still? That's why I played that song a minute ago. That's why I did my CD.

It's songs for the caregiver because I wanted to be able to give a place for caregivers. It's 50 plus minutes of you just being able to be still and listen. And if you fall asleep while listening to my CD, great. If you start crying, great. Weep or sleep, I don't care. Either way, it's going to be healing for you.

And it respects the trauma. And I put on their songs that mean something to us as caregivers. I need thee every hour. Balm and Gilead. Wait till you hear Gracie sing Balm and Gilead. I've never heard anybody sing it like she has. And this song is a favorite hymn of my father's and it really defines his entire ministry.

There is a balm in Gilead to heal the wounded soul, to make the wounded whole to heal the sin-sick soul. And it's a lament of a place in pain. And Gracie lives with pain all the time and she sang it from that place and I sat down and played it with her.

And she did it live to track, which means, boom, she just laid it down and cut it. For those of you that know anything about the music business, that's what real talent looks like. And the engineer was working on it with me. He's a great friend of mine. He's a Grammy Award winner. And he looked at me and had tears in his eyes. He said, well, those who can, do.

And she just nailed it. Wait till you hear it and let it soothe you. Let it respect the trauma. That's how you respect the trauma that you're in. Your soul is traumatized as a caregiver.

If it's not, give it time because it will be. Now, if you've been a caregiver for, you know, 13 minutes, OK, maybe you make a case. But when you do this thing for years, and in my case now decades, you have to understand the trauma that is happening to you and respect it. Scripture respected that this man had been sick for a long time. Thirty eight years he'd been laying by that pool. It was in scripture said it was a long time.

Jesus knew he'd been there a long time. OK, that's respecting what had happened to this man. One of the reasons we do this show is because I respect the trauma of what happens to fellow caregivers. To each of us. And when I went to American Family Radio with the concept of doing this show, this was this was the discussion of understanding the trauma that you are having as a caregiver.

That's why we get the calls that we get. That's why we have the reach that we have, because finally somebody is saying to caregivers, I respect your trauma. More importantly, God respects it.

And here's what he says about it. And here's the path towards letting healing touch those places. Some things aren't going to be fixed this side of heaven. You and I both know that. Anybody tells you different?

Selling something. There's some things that we're just going to groan with while we're on this earth. That's the truth.

And I look at some of these people out there that are making an awful lot of money selling basically what I call snake oil to people who are desperate. And I do not ever doubt the healing power of Christ. Ever. But I also know that this whole world is groaning in anticipation of God restoring all of this. And he will. But some things he's going to allow to endure throughout this lifetime. But he promises that he will be with us through it. And he respects your trauma.

And he offers. That's why the Holy Spirit came in the first place. The comforter has come.

Now do you see how that connects now? Why do you send a comforter if people don't need comfort? But we do.

And as caregivers we do. I dropped Bernie, or Bernie got dropped earlier from Michigan, but he's with us right now. Bernie, good morning.

I'm sorry we got the call dropped. How are you doing? Great. Great.

How are you today? You know, I've done a mental inventory, Bernie. I think most of me is okay. I should call you my little brother because you are younger than me.

Well, yeah, but I got a lot of mileage on me, Bernie, and they're not interstate bows. Well, I won't tell you that it's only two years, but anyway. That's all right. Go ahead. Tell me what's going on with your heart and mind. Well, brother, I really, really appreciate this program because it just brings comfort that somebody is like, I get it, and I know what you're going through.

And I'll tell you a little bit of my story. Our son got in a traumatic brain injury as he was going back to college, Christian College in LaGrange, Wyoming, Frontier School of Bible. I'll put a plug in for them because it's an awesome school. But anyway.

It is an awesome school. Yeah, he he was beat up really bad. They didn't expect him to live. And we had to rush a 10 hour drive down to the hospital.

They're about halfway there from from Michigan here. And just amazing things happen, one thing after another. But he wasn't expected to live to where now he graduated and he's working as a PTA. And anyway, for the last 10 years, this is all we've been doing is helping and caring for him. And they just, you know, prescribe that both of us have my wife and I have PTSD, post-traumatic stress syndrome. And it is something that's very difficult to to deal with.

You know, Bernie, you know, Bernie, I've thought that for a long time. I can't tell you there's any kind of diagnosis for that. But I have purported on this show and said many times that caregivers live with a some level, some type of PTSD. A lot of us, it's PTSD.

There's no post because we're still doing it. But caregiving doesn't stop at the grave. You know, the stress of this. So I'm glad you brought that up.

Thank you for bringing that up. I have a special place in my heart for for folks with family members of TBI as I've spoken to TBI conferences and so forth. And when you're dealing with a traumatic brain injury, it is a it is a unique challenge all of its own. It doesn't mean that it's worse or better or easier or harder than anything else. It's just it's different. And it does cause an enormous strain on the family.

Talk about respecting your trauma as a caregiver for a traumatic brain patient. Talk about that, Bernie. Well, some of it is like like we're at the post end. So, I mean, he's out. He's finally moved out just recently and he's on his own.

And, you know, we're supporting him still. But it's kind of this feeling of being lost. Like you don't know what to do with yourself because this whole time you have been, you know, concentrating all your energy and effort on making this this boy well. And then now he's finally at the point where he is he's on his own.

Now, what do we do? You know, it's a weird feeling. And and and then it's a feeling that I felt safe and secure at home working with him. Now I got to go back and get involved in my church again. And I got to go, you know, this is overwhelming. It's it's stuff that normally before it was like, well, singing church, no big deal. Now it's like, oh, my word, I sing in church, you know. You know, I get I get that really exaggerated. And it's very, very difficult to overcome those those feelings. And you see, I mean, and I think that's kind of where we're at. I get that.

It's like the most simple task is amplified, you know, and the noise is really loud. I'd like to do I got a whole bunch of calls that I want to get get to. I don't want I feel bad when I can't get to him, but I want to do something for you, Bernie. I want to put you on hold.

And I'm sorry we got the call drop. Can I send you a copy of my CD Songs for the Caregiver? And and as you listen to it, would you just sit in the chair and just let me play for you and help maybe settle some of those nerves down a little bit?

Yes. Would you allow me to do that? Would you allow me just to send that to you and just if you go to sleep while listening to me play and Gracie sing, there's no greater honor. But if it if it allows you and your wife to weep through it, that's even better because it cleanses it.

I think it'll settle some of those those nerves down a little bit and it'll help lower the noise level. Does that does that make sense? Yes.

But don't leave here on the radio. Have you ever struggled to trust God when lousy things happen to you? I'm Gracie Rosenberger. And in 1983, I experienced a horrific car accident leading to 80 surgeries and both legs amputated. I questioned why God allowed something so brutal to happen to me.

But over time, my questions changed and I discovered courage to trust God. That understanding, along with an appreciation for quality prosthetic limbs, led me to establish standing with hope for more than a dozen years. We've been working with the government of Ghana and West Africa, equipping and training local workers to build and maintain quality prosthetic limbs for their own people. On a regular basis, we purchase and ship equipment and supplies.

And with the help of inmates in a Tennessee prison, we also recycle parts from donated limbs. All of this is to point others to Christ, the source of my hope and strength. Please visit standingwithhope.com to learn more and participate in lifting others up. That's standingwithhope.com. I'm Gracie, and I am standing with hope. My life, my life is in your hands. That is my wife, Gracie, and I love listening to her sing and I thank Ruby again for her comments about it.

That's from her record, Resilient. You can get a copy of that today. Go out to hopeforthecaregiver.com. Click on the donate button. Whatever is on your heart.

I don't care. Whatever is on your heart. Help us do this show better.

If you like what you hear on this show, if you like what's going on on this show, help us do it better. I'll send you a copy of her CD. It's a very special CD that you will love and it will strengthen you and encourage you and inspire you and bless you. And the girl can really sing. And like I said, when she sings, she's not broken. And something happens. Her spirit just flies. And I accompany her on most of this and it's just such a treat to watch her do it.

And I'm sorry, by the way, we ran out of the break there with Bernie, but we got his information. We're going to send him a copy of my CD, Songs for the Caregiver, which I specifically did to help calm the nerves and quiet the noise for fellow caregivers. And I know people who have patients with dementia who get real agitated and they'll play that CD, they'll just loop it. And it just keeps them calmer.

It just helps them stay calm. That's why I did it. These hymns are around for a reason. I'm a big fan of the hymns of the church. I studied piano. I've been playing the piano since I was five. I grew up, I remember my mother holding the hymnal when I was a little boy and I could make out the staves and the notes, but I couldn't read.

So I couldn't read the text of it, but I could read the music of it. But I learned how to play through the hymnal. And, you know, when you go through these difficult times in your life, the hymns of our church, these great hymns of the faith, they're the things that you want to hear and sustain you. And I play them in a way that's like a guy who's watched a woman suffer for several decades, because that's what I've done. And so I think you'll find it very meaningful and you can get that CD as well.

I'm not trying to just hawk on my merchandise, but I did this stuff for caregivers. Everything I do is for people in trauma who are hurting. And I want to give you something. And for Bernie, it is such a pleasure to send him this CD, because I know that he and his wife, when you deal with TBI and those of you who are in the traumatic brain injury world that you've lived there, you understand it is traumatic for everybody and your nerves are just raw. And Bernie, I just want you to know, I'm sorry we had to rush to the break there, but I want you to know how meaningful your call was and how much I respect your trauma. And I want to hear back. I believe that you'll find great comfort in listening to this CD that'll just calm your heart and allow you to kind of get back into that groove. Because I want you to sing in church.

I want you to get back into those things and do as much as you can. But I also understand that your nerves are just raw. And you and your wife both. And I get that.

I truly, truly get that. I'm going to go real quick. I'm just going to try to get as many calls in as I can. And Ariel and Oklahoma, you've been waiting a long time.

Ariel, thank you so much for waiting. How are you feeling? Good. How are you today? You know, from all accounts, I think I'm doing okay.

They haven't sent a truck to get me yet. So tell me what's on your heart and mind. I was going to call and answer the trivia question.

Well, go ahead and answer it. Because we need a reminder again. The question, what was the name of the pool where Jesus went where this guy was hanging out? Because some people didn't start off at the beginning of the show.

So they may just be coming on. We had a trivia question. What was the name of that pool? And it said that he'd been there for 38 years. And then scripture said he'd been there a long time. Jesus knew that he'd been there a long time.

He respected the journey of this man. What was the name of that pool, Ariel? Bethesda.

Bethesda. Great answer. That was a great answer. Thank you so much for sharing that.

What else is on your heart? Well, so Ariel is his name. This is his dad. He just turned 10 years old a couple of weeks ago. Well, I thought he blew through puberty pretty quick when I heard your voice. And I thought, man, that kid's growing up fast.

They really do grow up fast, don't they? But tell me your name, sir. Tell me your name. My name is Kevin.

Kevin, how are you feeling? I was actually planning on going to bed at 7 o'clock, but this young man came walking in the living room and he is a radio and AFR. I know it's normally used in a negative term of junkie, but he can play just a clip of somebody for five seconds and he can tell you their name and like what time they're on at the day. Tell me his name again because it said Ariel. What is his name? So you pronounce it R-E-L. I mean in America it's really difficult because in America everybody's used to seeing Ariel and so when they look at his name they think of that, but you can think of pronounce it just like the letters R-E-L. But this young man, you know, speaking of caregiving, I mean he listens to kind of everything and being on farming we're harvesting or planting at all hours of the day or the night depending on what's going on.

I've heard you mostly in the last year or so and caught some of the programs where you're interviewing Jeff Foxworthy or Shonda Pierce or some neat things and remember what I was doing even when you were interviewing them. And really have a respect for this particular life of one of my best friends that while my wife was pregnant with Ariel in Georgia, we were at a ministry there and this man grew up Catholic. He had left, had a successful business, had been in the Navy. His wife that he had had three children with and who was a nurse came up with Pick's disease, a really rare disease and he had grown up Catholic. He had heard of a miracle prayer that they would pray for a miracle and he went to them to have them pray that and he wasn't really involved much in the church. They would go but weren't really involved and they had one grandchild at the time I believe.

I'm going to have to get you to go all the way to the bottom of the story here because I'm running out of time here and I don't want to cut you off but go all the way to the bottom of the story if you could. Yeah, so this brother wound up, his wife turned to be a vegetable basically. Here it is, he had three children with her and a grandchild and she progressed all the way to when we met him. She was still walking but the next year she actually wasn't and so we stayed in touch even though they were living out of their motorhome and things and just seeing him go through that and being a best friend to him. And then her passing actually when Ariel was in the hospital on life support and ICU and so I actually, it was amazing that he called me in the morning. Yeah, and the journey and we've been around people just in the last year, a single mom who lost her three children, a misunderstanding came up and her children were taken away and another coworker, a good friend of mine, he had his two children taken away and been through those battles with them. Thank God they've both gotten theirs back but it's amazing he called in on this day because I really respect your journey you've been through and how y'all graciously walked through it and amazing your wife. Well graciously, you're gracious to say graciously.

We've walked through it bloody, beaten up and with a lot of bandages and so forth and a lot of paramedics hanging around us. Listen, I gotta run but you tell that young man that he is being nurtured and grown up with the knowledge of the Lord. You're doing a great job with him and you thank him for knowing that for us and thank you for letting us just have the pleasure of meeting him. I've got to run but I do appreciate the call and I appreciate what you guys are doing and I appreciate that you're listening to AFR into this show. And so thank you so much.

I'm sorry to cut it off but I gotta run. I also want to give a quick shout out to a lady in Brazil who's listening today, Silva, and I told her I would talk to her. Sylvia, her uncle was struggling with something very serious and they reached out to us through our prosthetic limb program. We have, when Gracie lost her legs, we started Standing With Hope and Standing With Hope, you've heard her story on the show, we help provide prosthetic legs to amputees. We've been working in the country of Ghana. We've done them in other countries but we have to work within that system. But we recycle, use prosthetic limbs, and they go to a prison in Arizona where inmates will help us disassemble the parts that can be recycled and then we'll purchase new material, we'll work with prosthetists, we've trained them and worked with them over in West Africa for 15 years. And she's working with her uncle right now who's very, very sick in Brazil and she's listening on AFR.

That's the beauty of AFR is that it's worldwide. And so I just want you to know, Sylvia, that we are lifting you guys up in prayer. We know this is a very serious situation. And I'd ask for this AFR audience, this is a praying audience, to lift Sylvia and her family up in prayer. And Sylvia, look, through just listening over online through AFR.net, we're able to be connected on this thing and thank you for the updates on your family. Real quick, I'm going to squeeze in a call with Mike in Virginia.

Mike only got like about a minute. I'm sorry to do that to you, but how are you feeling? Well, physically I feel well. I guess that's it, huh? Well, we got about 20 seconds. Is there something you want to say real quick?

Oh, I don't know. I guess just pray for my wife, Liz. Pray for her situation.

She's just about bedridden and I've been retired for about a year or so and so caregiving is a new thing for me and I really didn't cook many meals and didn't do housework before. Well, you're there now and you can do it. Keep listening to the show. Give us a shot to call back early next week on the show. We'll talk about all this if you'll do that, okay? Call back at the beginning of the show and we'll put you in there first. This is Peter Rosenberg and this is Hope for the Caregiver. Hopeforthecaregiver.com