Absurd Truth: Exciting Whites!!

Dana Lashes of Sir Truth Podcast sponsored by Kel-Tec. It's his life mission to make bad decisions. It's time for Florida Man. A Florida Man said he did not know why he stole from Walmart. Deputies say, quote, that was stupid of me. A Florida Man found himself behind bars after he stole several items from a Walmart and hid them in a trash can. He told deputies that he didn't know why he did it.

Eric Slaughter, 38. He was arrested after the incident charged with felony larceny and retail theft. And it was a Walmart and deputies responded to said Walmart.

They met with a loss prevention officer. They said Slaughter purchased a he bought a plastic trash can but had another trash can that had items inside of it that he didn't pay for. And he was trying to hide it in the trash can. They found a solar light, a $30 solar light.

shoes. And that had they were $25 and they had a switch tag for a 74 cent fishing dauber and over $8 worth of items. And so he said he apologized for it. He goes, Well, that was stupid of me, is what he said. When they asked why he did it. He said he didn't know. And then he goes, Well, he didn't have enough money to buy him.

Honestly, some of this sounds like buying inflation. The saying it really does. I've got a story about the villages. This guy's mustache.

He looks like a vaudeville villain. And it once again, involves a golf cart. I don't know. I mean, I guess they drive around golf carts a lot in the villages. Yeah, yeah.

Okay. Yeah, because they have the golf cart chop shop second cars. Yeah, like if you had a second car. So this 40 year old, who was driving a red Yamaha golf cart, about 1030 at night on Wednesday, and he cut into the lane of a deputy who was following behind him. The deputy deputy initiated a traffic stop the guy his name is Christopher van weathering had been drinking. And when he was asked, Okay, how much have you consumed?

He said, quote, quite a bit. And he said he had four to five drinks. Oh, and that doesn't include the two beers and three shots. Oh, when he was asked to rate himself on a zero to 10 scale with zero being sober and 10 being heavily intoxicated. Van weathering gave himself a four.

He performed poorly in field sobriety exercises. His breath sample was point 178 blood alcohol content. Is that a four cane? I'd say that it was double the legal limit. Yeah, probably higher than a four. Yeah. And then there was a cooler in his golf cart and it contained a partially empty bottle of espelon.

tequila blanco and two small empty totally empty bottles of absolute vodka. So he got charged with DUI. He was ticketed for the open container violation and violating the deputies right away.

He posted $750 bond. I can I can kind of agree with getting into UI on a on a golf cart or whatever, but a DUI on a horse. Like I know, but that just seems like not because like the horses knows it's not gonna run into any horses or drunk. Yeah, so I never understood that. So, uh, yeah, the villages. Oh, and that's what I'm talking about.

And then there's a Cape Coral man. He was selling counterfeit fentanyl. Oh, wait, what?

So non killing type? I don't know. So he's Richard Riley 57 who looks old. He was arrested after his house was raided. They found all kinds of pill bottles and all kinds of stuff. But he's being charged with, I guess, counterfeit or counterfeit blue pressed fentanyl pills. I don't know what any of that means. I just think the counterfeit part. I don't know about drugs.

I don't know what that even means. So he was taken to Lee County Jail, he got charged with trafficking and oxycodone, some other stuff, controlled substance stuff. But they said that the majority of the pill bottles that there were that they found either had no label or labels with different names not associated with him or anybody else living in the house. And then they found all those mark pills there. I don't ghost pills when they call them ghost pills. But why would you do some like, well, I guess he was doing it Lee County, I guess he was doing it just to sell them. But you know, I mean, I don't know that I would want counterfeit fentanyl.

I wouldn't want fentanyl at all, but much less counterfeit fentanyl. A Florida man driving to Tesla thrown into the Gulf of Mexico in a crash near the Skyway Bridge. Oh my gosh, St. Petersburg, 25 year old man left the roadway, entered the shoulder, hit a drainage pond, flipped into the mangroves. He was not buckled up, he was thrown into the water, a passing boater picked him up, took him, he went to the hospital, he had serious injuries. And I, I don't even know how that happens. How do you just no seatbelt?

Well, no, I mean, how do you run off the highway like that? Right into the so anyway, he's, you know, he's in the hospital, but they haven't released any much more information about it. In a Miami Dade County, a Florida man, an inmate was accused of sending threatening messages to a dude in southwest Miami Dade telling him he wants his soul. He's going to kill him and he wants his soul. And he goes, he goes, I'm not going to spare you. He sounds like a monster.

This guy. He's this his last name's Castro, of course. But it was the Turner Guilford Knight Correctional Center. All American Company, they make really good products. And if you haven't checked out Kel-Tec, you should definitely do so and sign up for their newsletter as well.

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There's really not much more that I can or should say about that process other than that she's going to make that decision and she knows what she's doing. Why does he keep getting asked the best? His only answer should be like, gosh, no, because I just suck as like any type of like helpful person at all. And I can't even do my job, which I don't even know what it is. I work with transportation. What? I don't even know. I was on maternity leave, because I purchased some babies.

And I was on maternity leave. That's exactly what it is. And if anyone takes issue with it, this is what you can do.

You can send an email to KISS at my a double snake .com. At which point I will print it out, put it at the gun range, fill it up, fill it with holes, and then bring it back to my driveway where I will repeatedly run over it back up, run over it back up, run over it back up with my little segue that I got from Mother's Day a few years ago. And that's what will happen. Welcome back to the show. Dana Lash here with you. It's Friday. We're at the top of this third hour. I don't know why they keep asking him about this.

It's poop booty juice. He's so flattered to be mentioned as the potential VB candidate. They have nobody else. I although I think it would probably be Andy Bashir because you're not going to get the de Borna stans to support a Jewish guy like Josh Shapiro on the ticket. That's Democrats have a Jewish problem.

They have a problem with Jewish people. I mean, I'm just being stating what we all know, right? Just like we all know that, you know, Biden probably cannot stop slobbering for you know, why he has a million jump jump cuts in his videos. But he's and Steve noted that Andy Bashir, he's governor of Texas, his last one of his last tweets, he said, No matter what the future holds, Kentucky is my home.

That will never change because I'm one proud Kentuckian. Oh, dude, that does sound like he's ready. That sounds like he's doesn't it?

It doesn't sound like it's going to be poop booty juice. He's just like praying that someone gives him a position. What is he going to do? Remember, he was on maternity leave for three months, he purchased some babies. And then he was like, Oh, I'm so tired. I got to take three months off work because I purchased some babies. And then he didn't answer a single email about the supply chain crisis.

And it was a huge issue to the point where the New York Times even wrote about it, which is bad. And he's, he's completely. I don't know what the guy does. I really don't know what he does. What does he do? What does he actually do?

What can he doesn't even know what he does? What the hell does Pete Buttigieg do at Department of Transportation? Does anyone think he actually knows anything about a vehicle? Or roads or transportation? Maybe buses. You mean like Uber? No, he, they had 49 buses in South Bend, Kane.

He couldn't fill the potholes, though. Just saying. I kind of think it's going to be Andy Bashir, if I'm being honest, the VP pick. Because it's, Washington Post is really mad about it, too. They're like, why almost everyone assumes Kamala Harris has to pick a white man. Do you have anybody else but an old white man on the Democrat side? I mean, who else do you have Democrats? You ran everybody else out.

Who else do you have? They don't have anybody. So you, if you're trying to get the intersectionality that you want, I can't even believe that we're doing this. Democrats don't go, this person is, this person has some accomplishments, and they have a nice, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. It looks like they've worked hard here.

Okay, this, you know, this could, we could do this. No, they're like, well, well, is he gay? Is this person of color? Is this person gay? How does this person have sex? Because that's very important when we're determining how to hire for a very important position. We can't let you make decisions about the economy unless everyone knows how you have the sex.

They got to check those intersectionality boxes. So Andy Beshear, he's in his mid 40s. He's what, baby Gen X.

He's older than me, but he's baby Gen X. So he's governor of Kentucky. He's pretty, he's, he's considered, he's still far left, according to a constitutionalist view of things. But he doesn't run around like a member of the squad. And that might be, but does he want to jump on that landmine?

So this is the other thing. Whoever is the VP pick, you're having to jump on the landmine that is this campaign. Kamala Harris won't win this election for herself.

The media will have to win this election for Kamala Harris. She will not win this election for herself. She has not neither the ability, nor the momentum. She does not have the influence. She does not have the ability to do that. She does not have that relationship with voters. There is no way in hell she can win this election by herself. She has to have the media do it for her. And then if she has somebody like Andy Beshear, the only problem with having somebody, if you're Kamala Harris, and you have Andy Beshear as your ticket, does it make you look even more unaccomplished? Because he was at least governor, but he's a big old Marxist. You're a Marxist if you're a Democrat at this point. Does it make her look less accomplished?

And then does that make you think, oh, wow, I wouldn't want her in the White House, if you're a voter who apparently has had your head up your backside this entire time, and you just now popped out to see what's up? I mean, how do you how does wouldn't you because I would look at that and be like, wow, she's really that unaccomplished? No way. Right?

Who do you think it's going to be, Kane? Oh, I have no idea. The fact that we're about 100 days out, and you we've seen the blitz over just the last couple of days for Kamala. And the quote unquote, all these independent donors, which by the way, we know that's not true. Act Blue is really not really not being straight with that.

But yeah, I couldn't tell you. And I think they will pull some sort of a surprise here. Really soon. This is what Andy Bashir had to say about JD Vance. He apparently had an argument with JD Vance.

This is from WHS channel 11 ABC in Kentucky. He pulled out a Diet Mountain Dew and issued an apology because he had a disagreement with JD Vance. And Bashir said that he wanted to set the record straight and apologize to Diet Mountain Dew.

Because I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say negative things about you. And the reason he said that is because he was on CNN. And he told CNN he was asked about some remarks or something that JD Vance said. And Bashir goes, quote, what was weird was him joking about racism and then talking about Diet Mountain Dew.

Who drinks Diet Mountain Dew? In all seriousness, he ain't from here. He's not from Kentucky.

And he and so he's trying to be a gatekeeper. They're going to have the hillbilly off is what it's going to be. I feel like Vance would win that one.

You know, if I'm being honest about it, I mean, if you want to try to make this a class warfare thing and gatekeep, I really feel like, you know, that Vance is probably going to win that one. I mean, he's, he, I mean, Andy Bashir is a NEPO baby. His dad, his his family, I mean, they he comes from a very well to do family. And his dad was also governor of the United States of America.

And his dad was also governor of Kentucky. So he's a NEPO baby. Andy Bashir is a NEPO baby. So you can't you don't get to gatekeep over hillbilly dude. You're a NEPO baby. And by that very definition, you're excluded from being the bouncer of hillbillies. Hillbillies don't like NEPO babies as bouncers.

Just saying, you don't get to do that. So he's like this well to do guy who was born with a silver spoon up his backside. And he's he got mad at JD Vance, because JD Vance had said at one point he drank diet Mountain Dew and he's like, he's like diet Mountain Dew who drinks diet Mountain Dew like all of a sudden Andy Bashir is going to pretend that he did not come from just oodles of money and act like that's a bad thing.

I'm gonna tell you what slick we drink diet Mountain Dew up in this house. You got issue with that. Again, I will give the same instructions to anybody that's got a problem with that, like I would to anybody who got mad at me talking about poo booty judge purchasing some babies, right? You can send it to kiss at my double snakes calm at what point at which point I will print it out, take it to the range, blow it up, bring it back the shreds of it, lay it out nice and neat my driveway, get my mini Segway out that I received as a Mother's Day gift six years ago on Amazon.

It's half the size of a regular Segway but still does the job and I will back and forth back and forth back and forth roll right over it. And that's what will happen to it. So I have a question. Yes. Is snakes spelled out s and a key k es or the $2 sign? No, it's the two S's because I'm trying to be a nice person here. And you know, just it's a right and then what son starts with an s two of them. Okay.

Steve is actually taking it seriously. No. I mean, two snakes. I love it. Die Mountain Dew. What's wrong with Die Mountain Dew? Who nominated Andy Bashir to be the bouncer for hillbillies? I want to know.

This guy wears a damn sweater vest. Have you seen this? Have you seen it?

You seen it? I just I'm trying to be a jerk, but I get really upset over this kind of stuff. Yeah, his I mean, he comes from money. His dad was a governor. You know, his mom.

She comes from money. I mean, they all I mean, I'm not and that's not a bad thing either. It's only a bad thing when you try to act like, Oh, wait a minute.

This guy could be a threat. So I'm going to try to take the thing that he actually is known for and gatekeep it. You don't get to do that. Right?

You don't get to do that. So anyway, I just find it very interesting. And then his dad came from money too. So just did you know? Did you guys see the picture of the screenshot from the wine aisle in the grocery store that says exciting whites?

And it was Kamala Harris's VP shortlist. Oh, my gosh, that's it was was there a signature Andy Bashir bottle in there? No, there's a Josh though.

Exciting whites. I mean, I can't I can't with this. This is just I don't know. But I kind of think it's going to be Andy Bashir. I because I just feel like Democrats, they have a problem with Jewish people and they're not going to allow for Excuse me, Josh up here, but JB JB Pritzker looks like the penguin. And I really just feel like that's not the optic that you want to have to go out and do something. You want to go out and have an actual DC villain? As your VP? You know, I mean, you wouldn't have an issue with money for sure. But still, I don't know.

I mean, this whole thing. So if it's not Andy Bashir, who do you have? And if it's not Josh Shapiro, you have poo booty juice.

You have JB Pritzker. The penguin from DC. Who else?

Who else was it? Right. You don't think Newsome?

No, no, you're not gonna have to Californians. Yeah, not gonna have to Newsome, I think is saving himself for 2028. And the fact that Pelosi already came out and back Harris, she would not. I think that's, to me, and the fact that his name has completely dropped out of all this discussion. And you haven't seen him traveling anymore. He's saving himself for 2028.

Because he was only going out there when he thought I think, you know, that maybe I can still edge out. Now, keep in mind, never underestimate Democrats ability to just foobar everything up for themselves. They could walk. I mean, Newsome could walk in WWE style to the DNC convention with all the super delegates, and they can just bide their time until second round of voting where all hell breaks loose. You don't know. So nobody really does. Just, you know, just saying. But yeah, it makes sense because he needs some years to repair his reputation if he's going to run in 2028. Yeah.

So he's got you know, and he's he will buy that time he will. So I mean, who else do they got? They don't have anybody else. They have nobody else. You could not have like a Gretchen Whitmer or an AB Klobuchar because you cannot have two unlikable women on a ticket.

People have a problem with just one unlikable woman. Just saying, do you ever ask yourself how you can work this hard and still be in debt? I mean, the piles of overdue bills, the threatening phone calls, the constant stress of wondering how you're going to make ends meet each month.

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Visit zapmydebt.com. And now all of the news you would probably miss. It's time for Dana's quick five. Because of a hideous economic policy coming out of this administration, that's probably also something to do with it. You know, they said that everybody's tapped out. And I mean, they're they're they're tapped out after punishing inflation.

And they're it's just it's just a ripple effect. So yeah, because everyone's broke. This isn't hard.

Like how is this a news headline? It's I mean, everybody's broke is all get out. It's not hard.

America's smallest departments are getting even smaller. I don't think you should live in an apartment or condo unless you absolutely have to. I mean, I mean, if you want to, that's you. But I can't stand people like living by people. I don't live by nobody. I want to share my wall with nobody. When you grew up, like, like in I we lived kind of in a rural area.

So I you know, we didn't have to worry about any of that. I can't even imagine living on top of people like that. But they're saying that studio units are losing space. They have 10% space than they had a decade ago. And apparently this is, you know, well, yeah, I mean, again, this is all going to work economic policy is going to be reflected on everything. Gavin Newsom has ordered California officials to clear homeless encampments, because he's tired, I guess of getting made fun of about not being able to do anything about the needles and feces everywhere. So he's ordered them to clear out these encampments, and to begin sweeping them out off of public property, using newfound authority after the US Supreme Court's okay last month. They're removing anything that that poses a risk to life health and safety, which couldn't be all of it. At this point, 10s of 1000s of people living in tents across the state of California, and they said 180,000 people are homeless, basically any given night 123,000 are unsheltered and sleeping in tents, vehicles, etc.

So they are they're spending $24 billion in taxpayer money to try to figure out why people are homeless. Really? I can't. Let's see here this. And why didn't he do it before?

That's also a good question. Is the musical mind immune to cognitive decline? The short answer is yes. According to a study, whether or not participants were in their 20s or 80s, they were equally adept at picking up musical themes they were asked to identify. And this held true to across all pieces of music, regardless of how familiar or unfamiliar the style was. So that's interesting.

So the it showcases the power of music to connect and keep your brain healthy. So it's a very I'm not I'm not totally surprised by that. We got a lot more to get into including.

That's all these media losers do. That's literally how I have it written down on my rundown. Stick with us. Now in the meantime, because we've got all of this we also have we're going to get into some of the Secret Service stuff. When does that when did the Olympics kick off? I really don't care.

Is it tomorrow? I don't know. I guess into the torch thing.

The more politicized it got, the less interested I became. So they've got other celebrities there and they had trains to and from Paris were disrupted by people, I guess protesting. They said it was sabotage fires were set off at several rail lines. They said people were fleeing from the sites. Excuse me, the train operators said that this situation is going to last all through the weekend. They were even saying that some of the athletes couldn't even get there.

That's kind of that's unfortunate. But it's in Paris. What do you expect? France has just allowed itself to get just to get rough.

I mean, just run over roughshod. Yeah, Cain has the schedule. I'm not Are you watching any of it? Because I'm sure as hell not watching any of it. I'm seeing like some highlights stuff, you know, just like you would any political thing. That's something you don't want to watch. You'll see the highlights like on Twitter and things of that nature on x.

So that's what I'm looking for. I literally am not making any effort to watch it. Yeah, me there. They said the French capital gearing up for these celebrations travel chaos has been just been crazy. And they said that France was very embarrassed by the opening day shambles. And there are flood warnings, a weather disaster Lady Gaga is apparently performing tonight. The arson travel chaos, the locals say they're embarrassed by it. And they said that there were fires at key facilities, trains were just halted. Almost a million people were affected, including athletes and spectators heading to the game.

And now they have weather, they have weather issues, too. So I don't know, I just feel like they're, I don't know, it's just it's bread and circuses. That's why I don't get into the Olympics anymore. It's bread and circuses is all it is. It's all it is. That's why I don't get into a lot of a lot of sports.

Honestly, I'm going to be real. I'm not trying to be ignorant. But I, I do feel like it's the bread and circuses, which this was, if you guys remember, that was a phrase this Roman poet back in the days of your came up with that to talk about how Rome was distracting distracting its populace, and and diverting the Romans attention away from their rotting empire with, you know, gladiators and duels and all this other stuff. And you know, the races over at Circus Maximus and all of that. So I, it was they no longer cared about being politically or civically involved, and their birthright of that.

And so they got the bread and circuses. It's just a distraction. And I feel like that's what this is. I really don't even care. You know why? Because the good, the goodwill is fake. Maybe at one point, there was goodwill, but I don't really believe that there is anymore. I really don't.

I think it's just all just even if there is, it's just the perception of it. And it's just done. So as a strategy, not as anything that's, you know, genuine. And it just seems stupid, right? I really don't. I don't care.

Oh, my gosh, who's gonna win with this particular sport? I don't care. I don't really, I really don't care.

I really don't care. It's all stupid. It's all political. All of it.

I mean, even the down to who's participating. It's political. So now and all the celebrities are there. So you're just gonna be it's all gonna be in your face the whole time. Is that mean?

Am I being harsh? You might have a little bit of the Friday blues. No, I just don't. I've never cared about any of those. I haven't cared about the Olympics since I was in school. No, I get it. And there's only like a certain amount of Olympic competitions that I even care to watch anyway. Yeah, you shared the schedule.

Wait, let me pick it. Yeah. So like today, they have shooting. So the 10 meter air rifle and the 10 meter.

That's about the only thing you know, but you know what, though? They're not going to at all show any of that anything with pistols. That's not gonna even air pistol. Now they're gonna show any of that. Really? Yeah, they won't show any USA shooting. Nothing like that. Thanks for tuning in to today's edition of Dana lashes absurd truth podcast. If you haven't already made sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple podcast, Spotify, wherever you get your podcast.