Absurd Truth: Where's Biden?!

Dana Lashes of Sir Truth Podcast sponsored by Kel-Tec. It's his life mission to make bad decisions.

It's time for Florida Man. Well, we have a story, a stalking story from The Villages. I feel like I'm talking about Minecraft.

A villager, I mean, literally, it's like Minecraft. A villager was accused of tormenting her neighbors, but she is going to avoid prosecution in a stalking case after her neighbors were forced to sell their home and leave The Villages. Suza Barr, 77, of The Villages, she was of Santo Domingo in Sumter County, agreed to enter into a pretrial intervention case to avoid prosecution. She had to do anger management. She apparently was terrorizing her neighbors because she got she got a dog and then would not train the dog, keep the dog on a lead. And I'm not one of those people who are against pit bulls because I actually know about dogs and like people who think that they get a teacup dog and then act like I know dogs. But she got a pit bull. You got to train dogs that are bigger and you got to train them.

She didn't train him. She didn't train this dog, didn't keep it on a lead or nothing. And she let her dog run around the neighborhood. And it was like running down and attacking other neighbors' dogs.

So that's a problem. And she refused to do anything about it. It would go after neighbors' cats, all kinds of stuff. According to the news here that was being reported. And then when she was asked by one neighbor's to do something about her dog, she cussed him out. And then she just started harassing them. She was anybody who worked on like landscapers, package delivery people, apparently she would use foul language whenever she saw them, they issued a they had a trespass warning issued against her. And then she called she tried to have them swatted, apparently, when they tried to remove a tree from their own property. Oh, my gosh, she finally had her animal taken away after it attacked another dog. And then, I mean, she just she followed them, apparently, according to the story, harass them. So now they had to sell their house. They left the villages and she got all these citations against her. She seems like she would boil somebody's bunny.

I gotta be real. That's a crazy lady, our partners, Kel-Tec, awesome American company, Kel-Tec American Company and Florida Born and Bred. And they're they share your values, obviously, but they're a very innovative Florida based creator of pistols, rifles, shotguns, accessories, gear, all kinds of stuff. And they've got game changing innovation and performance. The Sub 2k Gen 3 light foldable and effective.

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Golly, this is just such a mess. Biden said that he was going to be speaking to the nation about this at some point this week, but they didn't say when you on James, like, you don't think he's gonna at all, not this week at all. No, I'm sure Biden's body double will be out there talking just like they say. You think? Yeah. Just body double. They're just getting the... Why did I ask him?

Why did I ask him? They're just getting... You know what, I'm just gonna bring all the foil in and just foil you in over there. Getting the human suit, you know. You think he's in a suit. You think... So, Cain honestly believes. What do you believe? Tell everybody what you believe. You believe this. Go ahead. Well, look, we have a lot of reason... No, don't sit here.

Hold on. We have a lot... Look at how reasonable you are. Look at how reasonable he's being right now.

But on break, he's like, oh, you know what? I haven't... Look, I haven't shied away from my positions at all. But based on what we know right now, which is, have you seen the president for the past few days?

Five days. The signature that was on that resignation letter tends to be a little tiny different than the signatures he's recently put on some legislation. He's like falling down on flat spaces.

Yes. He's gonna completely not be able to sign his name. Which reinforces the case of him getting out of there.

But I think that his defiance over the weekend... Remember when we were going into the weekend on Friday and he was like, I'm not going anywhere. I'm running. Yeah, now he's like, I'm not running. Well, somebody, deep state or otherwise, convinced him that his COVID was going to get a lot worse if he decides to not bow out. And now here we are, a signed letter, no video. Like, wouldn't the president put a small little video out there? Yeah, something. Anything.

Nothing like that has happened. So I think that we're, you know, we're being bamboozled by those who've been pulling the strings. Maybe because it's his campaign. And he just did it because they so I mean, I get that. And that's, you know, I'm kind of looking at that.

Maybe that that's why. But yeah, a lot of people were asking questions about but also to their handwriting, especially because isn't it set the rumors that he's got Parkinson's, right? Okay, he's got C3PO arms. I mean, they've denied that. Okay, well, look at him, though. I mean, he can deny they can deny it six ways a Sunday, but I mean, we see him. I mean, look at him. So it does sort of look like I think he signed it. But I think that he's also just not physically capable of doing his job.

And that's why, you know, that's why he did. They can't even polish him up a little to get a quick little one minute video out there. They can't even polish him up to get him even two minutes of video without 11 t frillion jump cuts. Like I'm Joe Biden. I mean, that's like that bad.

You know, it was like five jump cuts like Joe Biden. I mean, like they put together, they might as well just have him sound out every possibility of the alphabet and just put words together AI like that. They could do an AI video.

This is when you might actually see AI if it hasn't already been introduced, introduced cheap fake the cheap fake. I don't know. But there's not anything. I mean, I'm looking at his letter.

He doesn't say anything to the American anything to Americans doesn't say anything to Democrat voters. Yeah. What in the world?

I mean, you're this. This is wild. It is a real it's a really it's a letter that was released on his digital social media account that's run by a staffer. There isn't a photo. This is a very and this is when it gets very troubling for an it's a national security issue, I think.

Because what happens if you have a tyrant or terror cell that decides to get froggy? Where's the president? Where's the commander in chief? drops says he's not running for reelection. Nobody's seen him in a week. No photo.

He just has this letter that they released on social media. And that's it. I don't know. I mean, I don't I don't want to think about stuff like that.

But I have to to be practical and to be and it's smart to consider everything. I don't know. I just don't know. I think, though, that I honestly believe that in terms of getting Biden out, I think it was Obama that had it was Obama and Pelosi, but I think it was Obama too. I think both of them together, shoved him out. Some people were saying, Oh, he's Chicago waiting. Yeah, he probably did. I don't think I think the Biden family was too busy protecting Biden and covering their own backsides than to pay attention with any of this other stuff. I mean, when you were so sad, I wanted to pull this up to this was let me put because there was a story to do.

Yeah. Joe's brother, Frank, this was weird. He said that the way that he in this was, do we have this audio?

This is me drop it in general. This is a CBS report. The way his brother was describing it. Let me know when we got this audio because I saw this this morning and I thought that's a little odd.

Yeah, let's go ahead and show this because this was the this is when CBS was reporting it. I guess they spoke to his brother. Listen. Others and here's what he told us. He said, I'm incredibly proud of my brother. Selfishly, I will have him back to enjoy whatever time we have left. He is a genuine hero, country over self. It sounds corny in our cynical political environment, but he nor I are cynical. The goal remains the same. Defeat Trump and continue the work that Joe has done.

My hope is that our party rallies around this heroic act. We asked him whatever time we have left. So when he was asked about this, like a couple of weeks ago, he's like, Oh, he's in tip top shape is what he had said. So now whatever time we have left, it sounds like he's on death's door. Is that not weird?

Am I reading too much into it? That's weird. You're seeing what I'm seeing.

You're seeing exactly what's helping shape my beliefs. I don't know, man. That's weird. That is.

I don't know. And then, in addition to all of this, I saw this last night as well. Hunter Biden dropped his suit against Fox News, where he was going after the revenge porn stuff. He I think it would have been hard for him to win that because there's the measure of Are you a public figure and he is a public figure and he was the one who put this stuff on a public website. So you can't say that you were revenge porn when you literally were selling your stuff to a public website because I get I'm assuming he makes money off of it. I don't know why anyone would take video of themselves. Oh, like, literally grossed out myself just then. And put it up on these websites like that, you know, Hunter Biden.

But so he dropped because it wasn't going to nothing was going to come of that anyway. Hi, I'm George, an economics major at Hillsdale College. Here's Hillsdale President Dr. Larry Arnn with the Constitution Minute. The Declaration of Independence is more than a bold letter to a British king written by upstart colonists, although it very much is that the Declaration explains the promise of America that all men and women are born equal in their possessed of natural rights and that the proper exercise of these rights can lead to a full and deeply satisfying life. Just as the Declaration explains America's promise, the Constitution upholds that promise. Its purpose is to protect the rights of all of us, our natural rights. This establishes the possibility, not the guarantee, that we can have a good life. This is true freedom.

To learn more and get a free pocket Constitution, visit Constitutionminute.com. And now all of the news you would probably miss. It's time for Dana's quick five. An 80-year, 89-year-old, why didn't they just say an 89-year-old lady? She was, she's recovering because she was just randomly punched in New York. You know, if you're a tourist and you go to New York, you get free punches. You know, that's a thing.

I love New York! Punch. An 89-year-old, she got, she was just like knocked to the ground. She was waiting to cross the street. She just went to a coffee shop. She was waiting to cross the street and somebody came up from behind her and then reached around and hit her right in the eye. She just knocked her right to the ground. I mean, she probably dropped her coffee too.

Good grief. And they said they were looking for a female suspect. I just, and this is after Steve, you remember Steve Bushamy, what was it? Last month, he got punched in the face. All these people are getting punched in the face in New York?

I would not want to go to New York because you punch, I'm going to want to punch you back in the face. I don't know. We got, it's just weird, man.

That, that whole city. Also, let's see here. Oh, America's Next Great Wine. Dustin, why is nobody ever talking about Southern Missouri wines? No, we're not doing this. We're not doing it.

First off, no, heck no, no, no, no. You realize that when they had like a bunch of like a huge fungal outbreak in the wines in France that we took cuttings from wine, wineries, wineries in Southern Missouri and sent them there. And so basically they're all Missouri wines anyway. Just going to say they're like, oh, there's a new wine region. It's the next great wine destination in Northern Virginia. And I have to say some of the California wines are a little overrated.

They said at least more European than California. What does it even mean? I don't know. I'm not a Chardonnay drinker. I'm not a Pinot Grigio drinker.

I'm usually a cab drinker, but we got a million moderately priced cabs out there and maybe 50 percent of them are decent. But anyway, it's Southern. That's where the really that's where it all kind of hurt you in my head. Doing this story is like Schitt's Creek characters.

If you love a good fruit wine like I do, then you're going to want to check out. See, we just need to get like a sassakaya or somebody to sponsor us and then we can literally do the Moira Rose reeds for them. Let's see. The FDA again missed its deadline to propose a ban on formaldehyde in hair products.

And I guess they're talking about like straightening agents is what they're because there are some that you got to be careful when you're using this stuff. We have a lot more on the way, including Dana might be getting a dog today. So as you guys know, we had total change of tune here, total change of direction for the show. So we had two dogs, and we lost one dog three years ago. And then we lost our we lost Rocco in February, like literally the day that we got back from SHOT Show Rocco was not doing well. And we lost him the day we were back. It was horrific.

It was just you know, it's sad. And we knew he was struggling. He had packed surgery and he'd been rehabilitated and he was doing well. And then he had esophage.

He had a it's like a deterioration of his esophagus and this bracy phallic dog. And Frenchies are adorable. And they are really the sweetest dogs. But they suffer so many ailments. I can never do another Frenchie again, after what we went through with Rocco and Lou. I love them so much.

But I could never and if you are not committed to medical bills and allergies and all of that, you should not do a Frenchie. So, and it was really hard. I still have his his little, you know, his little dog sofa. I still have his little food and water bowl.

There were certain things that we just couldn't get rid of certain things we did. We donated a lot of their beds, they have beds all over the house. Rocco had to have beds literally all over the house because he had trouble walking and I would put down like just cheap rugs, little runners for him to walk because we have hardwood floors because he struggled with his bad leg and his back and all that. So he could grip the floor. So he kind of like a weird, you know, weird. Weird stuff all around the house. But I did that just so he could have places to walk and he could, you know, grip the floor. And he had beds everywhere. So we took donated those to different shelters.

And we always like, I don't ever talk about it on air because they get real book of Matthew about it. But we always financially support shelters and there's like small shelters. Like there's a great one out of Kentucky called Backroads that, you know, they they find and rehabilitate these animals and we help with their vet bills and things like that. And but I wanted to go to a shelter because I'm like, I just don't I just doesn't feel right to just get a puppy and I didn't want to go to the breeder route. I've done, look, I've gotten dogs from fancy breeders, right? I've done that before I've had every type of dog you can imagine.

And some of the best dogs that I've had were dogs that were just mutts they weren't you know, I mean, Louie, our dog Louie came from a very like a champion line and he still, you know, had all these animals. You're it's nothing is a guarantee. And I wanted to go to a shelter.

to a shelter. But here's my problem. I don't care what people think about me. I don't care. My problem is walking into a shelter and feeling like the Simon Cowell of the shelter and I'm trying to figure out, well, this dog is good enough.

This one isn't. What a jackass thing to do, right? I don't know how to do this because Kane was like, are you a worry that you're going to like vibe with every dog? And I'm like, yes, I am Snow White.

Like, I am the person that butterflies will land on and dragonflies are like, hello. And Kane asked me, he's like, do birds help you dress in the morning? It's a big problem. So I don't know. I don't know what to do. Like, I don't want to walk in there and feel like I'm, I don't want these, these dog spirits are already broken enough.

Like they're sitting in their little, their little cells listening to like Death Cab for Cutie and cutting their paws. I don't know. Like I just don't.

Yes. I don't know what to do. It's a problem.

So I, I am, I would love to hear from people who have done this because I will want all of them. That's my problem. I am, I am a little afraid to let loose in there. Kane, what do I do? I don't know what to do.

Internet, tell me, what do I do? I know you fear you're going to vibe with every dog. Even the ones who don't want to vibe with me, I'm like, no, you're going to be my friend. Like I, that sounds creepy. You know what I mean?

No, no. I think what's going to happen is you're going to see, you already have in mind the kind of dog you're looking at, right? You already have a vision in your head. I know me. I know me. I'm, I'm like, Dana, this is the type that's best for us.

But I'm going to go in there and be like, that one. I just know me. I know me.

I'm a toddler. But I think because of what you have in your head, you've been thinking about this for a while. It's not like you just started thinking about this a couple of days ago.

You've been thinking about this for quite a while. I think you have in your head what it is you're looking for. And I think you're going to vibe with every dog. That's fine.

But I think you'll really vibe with the ones that you want. Well, I said plural with the ones that you want. Yeah. Oh, that's the other thing because my husband was like, now don't Chris is like, don't sit here and try to make this a two dog thing. And I'm like dogs. And I just keep saying the same thing.

Like the pelicans from what is it? Finding Nemo, my dogs, dogs. And he's like, you know, I'll, he's like, if you do that, I'll just leave. And I'm like, well, I'll just Uber back with dogs.

Then what are you gonna do? It's gonna be dogs plural. I mean, it's just, and I, and like, what if it had a friend and it has to turn and look at his friend like, well, you know, like goodbye. You do care about what the dogs do.

I don't care what people think at all. But the dogs, I'm like, but it's what you think the dogs think because they're pure and I want a pure thing to think highly of me and I don't care what people think is going to be. Is it going to be one dog or two dogs?

Are you sure it's going to be two dogs? Well, I mean, maybe if there's, you know, I don't know. Like I, I've never, I don't know.

I don't know. See, whenever I've gotten a dog, it's like that has not been from someone else. It's always been a stray. So I've never gone into a shot as much as we've donated to shelters. I've never walked in there specifically for the task of taking a dog. The last dogs I've had is I've never wanted to walk where they, cause I know how I am. Yeah.

I've been from family or from people. I know the moment I get in there. Oh man, I'm no, it's going to be hard.

It's going to, I'm going to be walking out with full eyes. I think I personally think you're going to vibe with the one or the two that you, you know, you're just going to go to some shelters and not the other. Like I don't know. That's the other thing.

It's like, I might be, what about all the dogs at this shelter that I didn't go to? Oh my gosh. You know, like what a jerk am I? Right. Why?

Cause you can't take a hundred dogs. You're the jerk. Yes. Yes. Okay. That's how my mind works.

Like Dina, how dare you? I can't take a thousand dogs. I'm such a jerk. I don't know what to do.

So it's very difficult. I have no idea what's going to happen. I'm going to try to like, I'll try to update you with video. So we'll say how this goes. I couldn't believe that he finally did it cause he had been hesitant about going from a shelter cause his dad was a breeder and so he's for 24 hours. I haven't believed you when you texted me yesterday that Chris said you could have dogs. I was like, no, he didn't.

Yeah. Oh, he totally did. I broke him, man.

I broke him. I mean to an extent, like he was like, okay, dog. And I go, dogs?

Yeah. Dana's talking about getting dogs and I told her, I don't believe you agreed to that. And he's like, no, actually I'm going to go with it.

I'm like, yeah, he's a good man. All right. So we'll see. We'll see about the dogs situation. Thanks for tuning into today's edition of Dana Lashes, absurd truth podcast. If you haven't already made sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.