Absurd Truth: Paging Captain Obvious

Dana Lashes of Sir Truth Podcast sponsored by Kel-Tec. It's his life mission to make bad decisions. It's time for Florida Man. Suburban moms everywhere are going to cringe in horror when they hear this headline. A Florida man is accused of whacking an officer with a Stanley cup after breaking into the church. Mm-hmm. So y'all know the Stanley, everybody loves their Stanley. They make Stanley fannies, little fanny packs for your Stanley's. Stupidest thing I've ever seen. Hate that I didn't come up with it.

I could be rolling in cash money. Anyway, Palm Bay, Florida. Florida man found himself behind bars. He broke into a church, tried to smash a police officer in the head with a Stanley cup. Tim, Timothy Bornman. I'm supposed to believe this dude's 24 years old, Kane. I know. I'm calling shenanigans.

Is this what, is it 42? I don't know, man. He was arrested and charged with burglary, criminal mischief, battery and law enforcement officer, resisting arrest. It was at the Mission Church in Palm Bay. He broke into the church, grabbed a sledgehammer, broke the front door to get inside, damaged everything in sight.

$10,000-plus worth of damage. He was yelling and cussing at churchgoers, telling them he was going to blank them up. And then as an officer approached, he grabbed a, he had a metal Stanley cup, and he was, he tried to hit the police officer with it. The officer dodged it so he didn't get hit in the head, but it hit his shoulder.

Bornman tried to run away. Officer tased him. He went down. They took him into custody. And he admitted everything.

But oh, my gosh, like he's he's in custody on almost $18,000 bond. So all the women are going, how are you going to do your Stanley cup like that? How are you doing your Stanley? You can't say Stanley Cup. You just call it a Stanley, right?

I don't like drinking out of plastic bottles. So I drink out of a thermos. Was that the only one that thought it was the you know, the yeah, I first thought it was a hockey.

How does that church have a trophy? Anyway, it was a Stanley, the thermos. You got to be careful that you can't just say Stanley Cup. It's just a Stanley.

Otherwise, we're all the hockey people are going to go what? Anyway. This this I can't really pass judgment on him either. Cain's like, yeah, I'm not really mad about it. Seminole County man is accused of destroying nearly $1,000,000 of his money. $100,000 worth of automated license plate readers. 35 year old Eric fielder. They he's accused of causing significant damage lately.

I love that lead in. He's got eight separate allegations of criminal mischief, etc. They've they've been using automated license plate readers to solve a lot of local criminal cases. And this guy apparently was just he's something like the French would do.

He starts damaging all of them. It's like it's like $90,000 to replace all the automated license plate readers that he damaged. He wouldn't say why he did it.

He refused to give a statement. So they said that license plate readers help find the missing people wanted for criminal behavior, etc. They call it a critical investigative tool.

That surely can't be abused for the state at all. Right, Kane? The surveillance state, you mean?

Yeah. I don't like red light cameras either. I always was like, if I ever get a red light, I'm going to show up in court, I will become a hell on earth to deal with for the whole court. They're going to be like, get her out of here.

Take case dismissed. I mean, it's like how they package the Patriot Act. Yeah, it's for your safety. It is. It's all those good tools. I'm gonna tell you when they when they started putting all them before we moved to Texas and they have some around Texas.

But I learned everything I could about red light cameras, the law, the Fourth Amendment, everything. I was like, get me one. Send me a notice. I am waiting for it. I'm waiting to walk and I will represent myself. I am waiting.

Oh, my gosh. Because everyone's like, if you show up, normally they're like, whatever, because it's a complete absence of due process. Anyway, I'm going to get on a huge rant about this.

So let's move. Because I say I just I can't really get mad at him, right? It's vigilantism.

But right, it's against the surveillance state. Yeah, I mean, am I supposed to feel bad? I'm torn. Steve, how should we feel? Like, we should feel bad?

I don't know. I only feel bad because that particular municipality will have to tax their citizens or use their citizens tax dollars to repair it. But yeah, I agree. All other aspects of it I like. Yeah, I agree. Let's see here.

This Coral Springs, Florida. This guy was accused of pushing a whole stolen Coca Cola fridge through a neighborhood. There's video.

It's not the best quality, but there's video. They arrested a guy they caught, police arrested a guy they caught pushing, pushing a massive, huge, like giant red Coca Cola brand refrigerator literally down the street after midnight. Residents called police and they saw Francisco Hernandez 34 stolen from a Walmart past a home in their neighborhood. And they confront him. He's got a on a wheelbarrow. And he goes, What are you doing with this? And Hernandez goes just here. He's just putting it here in the street.

Is this a coke? Yeah. It's starting right off the top this Wall Street Journal article. Do you guys see this? Now, two things to note, the first thing is that they talked to both Democrats and Republicans. The second thing to note is that the Biden defenders are trying to discredit the story because they talked to Republicans. So they're trying to act like because Republicans were included, that it's a smear job. But again, they talked to Democrats and Republicans.

The Wall Street Journal piece says behind closed doors, Biden shows signs of slipping. They spoke to a lot of people. The Wall Street Journal did. And they said that the 81 year old president has performed poorly at times pause right here.

Let's go back to that interview, her interview, because they're fighting right now to get those trends by the Republicans trying to get those transcripts released, right? And what was said of Biden and his mental acuity as to why he couldn't stand trial? Can do you remember what did they say about Biden?

Why? Why couldn't he stand trial? He was an elderly man who had poor memory. He had poor memory.

He was not mentally fit to stand trial. Pretty amazing, right? So that let's just pull that right in with the story. So you have this Wall Street Journal story. And they are they interviewed tons of people, they interviewed a bunch of people that served, serve in the Biden administration work in the Biden administration. And they interviewed a lot of Democrat allies, they interviewed a lot of people for this. And so it's not a it's not like a partisan article, because they interviewed really a lot of people it gets into what some of the Republicans have witnessed, but also a lot of Democrats that didn't really want to go on record because they don't want the retribution of having from having done so.

So this is, it's a very stunning piece. And it really goes into what the her testimony what he was saying behind closed doors with that. Remember, they also said that they had edited, if you remember this, they had edited the transcript that Biden from Biden's testimony. Don't forget that they had edited it. Now remember what they said about the editing aspect of it?

Do you guys remember? They said that they had taken out redundant phrases like and if the now when you hear him speak, he will repeat things and it has nothing to do with a stutter. He repeats things because he loses his train of thought and he just kind of rolls off right? I'm Why can't we hear the audio not just the full transcript that was edited? Why can't we hear the audio of it? They want the tapes?

Why can't we hear the audio of that? Because don't you think that's significant? There's one thing if you're editing things, because somebody said, Oh, and and and this happened, as opposed to and then you edit and said, and this happened. That happens a lot of time in newsprint. That's why you'll see not really so much parentheticals, but bracket ellipses.

Some of the the marks, it's to edit out some of the redundant say I do that a lot on my newsletter, if there's from looking at a transcript, and I'm quoting it, you know, I may take like one conjunction or like one preposition if they're if they're trying to emphasize a point. There's a difference in doing that and a difference in showcasing whether or not it is a mental acuity issue, particularly when you've heard him speak. I mean, my gosh, you saw the video that we played yesterday for you. That was toward the end of the show, right? That video that came out where he had given his remarks, and he turned and he was kind of shuffling off the stage. And they they were shouting questions at him.

And they asked one particular question of him about Israel, and he stopped real weird, like right in front of the teleprompter. And he turned and look like a man possessed. That's like a horror film. You know, Kane says that old people aren't innocent.

That's like an old horror film, where it's like the bad guys like an elderly man, and he's really a demon. Right? It's totally like that. Can I felt you on that one?

You're vindicated, I think in that instant. Yeah. So it's, I mean, there's a difference, right?

Isn't there a difference? That's what I feel like we should know that especially after they admitted to editing it. Now, here's the other reason why I feel like we need to have access to this. These the the recording of the testimony, because and let me tie this into the hunter thing because of what happened with the hunter case.

So the laptop has been entered into evidence. Do you guys remember the 80 something? How many was it 80 some odd?

How many? But what did you know? That's what happened? You know, the truth is, it's sort of like a question, misinformation, and they knew it wasn't in fact, one of them came out later and said Yeah, well, we know it wasn't.

We just did it. So the fact that they were so willingly ready to lie to us about that makes me completely positive that they would lie to us about this. You see what I'm saying? So yes, you owe it to us. That's the problem of not being transparent and lying to the American public.

You don't get to now keep things privileged. We don't trust you, and for damn good reason. So this Wall Street Journal piece, pretty stunning. Because it was, even Mike Johnson was talking about this stuff. They talked to him, Lorraine says it was like 51.

I was like, it was a herd of them. He had sat down with Mike Johnson, talking about policy changes. And Johnson said that he is what he had worried. And this is why if you get the sub stack newsletter, why the it was a fake Time magazine cover, what does he remember?

That's why it was the image that I included because we were getting into this today. The his memory had slipped, according to Johnson, his Biden's memory had slipped and I'm looking at the Wall Street Journal piece about details of his own policy. So in a conversation with Speaker Johnson, Biden was struggling to remember his own policy. And they were having to like cue him like, Oh, well, this happened, Mr. President, and then you had this, this was also an issue. They had to like cue him on things on his own policy, guys. His own policy, that's kind of a big deal.

So they're freaking out about this right now. Because the polling was showing that, you know, Americans are asking what's happening with him? Why is Why is he like this? Why is he not able to remember anything?

Why does he seem so antagonistic? Golly, I haven't even touched on the Time magazine interview Jiminy Christmas. Guys, we're gonna have to jump into this to the Time magazine interview that he gave Holy cow, he challenged the reporter to a fight apparently. And it got really bad.

It got really bad. He said, quote, that he was asked large majorities of Americans, including the Democratic Party tell pollsters they think you're too old to lead. Can you really do this job as an 85 year old man? Biden says this quote, I can do it better than anybody, you know, you're looking at me, I can take you to wait, you can't challenge the president to fight you, because the Secret Service will get involved.

But he can challenge you. Yeah, can you accept it? Like, could the reporter go, Okay, I'm your huckleberry.

Can you do that? Or Secret Service? Like, no. I'm just wondering, I'm just I'm just asking a question while thinking about our partners over at Caltech. It's a great Florida based company that a lot of people try to rip off because they're just not as they're just not as smart. And they're not as innovative with their designs. And they're just not as good at designing guns like Caltech. I'm just gonna say it.

George Kellgren immigrated from Sweden, went to beautiful Florida, and launched a boomstick company. And very innovative. They create pistols, rifles, shotguns, all kinds of stuff, gear, accessories, all the good, you know, all that they got the new Gen three, sub 2k, I have the Gen two light foldable effective, you don't have to detach your optics, you just fold it in half and get up and go.

It's nice. And it's awesome nine millimeter carbine, they've done a couple of other upgrades. In addition to not having to detach the optic, you've got lightened action for easy racking ambidextrous bolt hold open. They also reconfigured some of the trigger so it's a lightened five pound pull all for improved accuracy translating to improve manipulation as well. Quality made right here in the US of A. See everything Caltech has to offer at Caltech weapons.com.

That's K E l t e c weapons.com. Tell them Dana sent you. And now all of the news you would probably miss.

It's time for Dana's quick five. So yesterday, AT&T Verizon customers had a nationwide outage. It affected a lot of stuff. They said that it was reported at least in 24 states, a lot of customers had service that didn't have service at all. AT&T knowledge problem announced that they resolved the issue. I mean, it was all over and it included 911 systems too.

And it was AT&T Verizon US cellular consumer cellular all had outages. Okay, I'm not saying that I think there's something shady. But you know, I'm just saying there could be. The iPhone 16 Pro Max dimensions really have leaked. They said it's a sci fi form factor. It's thicker. But it's bezels are thinner. They so there's, it's not mind blowing, but they said apparently supposed to be super fast. What does it have the M whatever chip the M for something crazy?

It is. Do you? Do you find that you hate using your phone to actually talk to people? Because I hate talking to people on my phone. I hate phone calls.

How weird is that? I work and talk radio. I I could talk to you guys like this all day. You get me on a phone with somebody. I'm like, Oh, my gosh, why is it happening to me?

I just can't deal with it. magnet fishing. A couple pulled up a safe with $100,000 in cash while magnet fishing in New York.

Do you get to keep it in? Would you tell anybody? These people apparently I guess they let the po po know. They told the police. They it was they were in Corona Park. They were magnet fishing. They pulled out an old safe, they opened it and they said it was two stacks of hundreds. It was actually it looks pretty like gnarly.

The money actually looks pretty grody. But still, like, if it wasn't, would you let people know? Would you? Can I be honest? Would you?

I don't think I would either. I would be like, Oh, this is the heavens giving me back all the stuff the government stole from me in Texas. Police say me and stole a liquor truck in hopes of selling off the booze to pay a drug debt.

I mean, jobs also are great. This is an Indiana he month. Is that Muncie or Muncie?

Muncie, Indiana. He apparently had stole a delivery truck full of beer and liquor pulled up outside a Cheers bar. And he was going to sell the booze pay off his drug debts. It didn't really go as planned. I don't really think that bars like just unsolicited liquor trucks pulling up either. I'm like, Hey, can you and also it's a liquor truck. You know, it's not like it's gonna go unnoticed.

You know, I'm saying? Yeah, a woman still alive at a Lincoln funeral home was finally kicked the bucket hours later. What in the world?

This is in Nebraska. They said a woman is pronounced dead, but she came back to life in the funeral home. And then she found and then she did die.

She did actually die again later, not long after. Oh, my gosh. And the thing is, Paula, you know, this is a good point that Jennifer makes is that one of the things that red state governors like the governors of Texas and Florida have done is they've sent the problem, if you want to call it a problem of undocumented people, they've shipped them all over the country, like the old, you know, segregationist and the civil rights used to put black people on buses to say, Hey, let's send them to your city so that you will be upset. And wait, what? First off, whose wig did she snatch? Because that come on, you're appropriating that. Well, it looks like Trump's hair. It actually looks like a hair.

Boris Johnson had a haircut. First off, welcome back to the program. Dana lash with you top of the second hour listen coast to coast terrestrially. You can also watch the simulcast the video component, which you can stream on channel 347.

Direct TV, watch us on x rumble Facebook, YouTube, all that good stuff. So can I do that? I just I got to point this out. And I made note of this earlier on social media. So sanctuary cities, and sanctuary states literally advertised their refusal to cooperate with ice, their refusal to cooperate with customs, border and customs. And also absent from her criticism here is the acknowledgement that Biden has been doing the exact same thing for longer with less fanfare. Oh, except he was actually a segregationist.

Oops. He actually was a segregationist. So she misses that with her rambling here. Everything's got to be about race to her.

This has to be the hers has to be the most boring damn show to produce. Honestly, every day it's the same thing we're going to talk about today. Joy racism. What are you going to talk about today? Joy race? What are you going to talk about today? Joy racism? What are you going to talk about today? Joy race? It's the same thing every day. It gets boring. Like you can't offer any other analysis because she has to see that's her grip.

She has to see everything through that lens. Where's the acknowledgement that Joe Biden was doing this a hell of a lot longer? I mean, he'll send Joe Biden out there to take the win on that. He was doing this before Abbott and DeSantis and everybody else. He was loading people on planes and sending them to wherever. Oh, but y'all didn't criticize that because you're all hypocrites. That's why because he's a Democrat, except he's an old white segregationist. He literally championed it. No, I mean literally go back and see what he said in the day.

He's been in office longer than I've been alive. Go back and see what he said. He literally championed segregation. He opposed the integration of schools.

And to that he's on video saying he didn't want his kids growing up in a racial jungle. That's Joe Biden. So he's literally you're, you're defending an actual segregationist while you're accusing other people of what you think are segregationist policies, things that Joe Biden actually started.

It just blows the mind. Do they not know the history of their own party? Do they not know what their party did five years ago?

Good heavens. So where's the criticism of that? That's how you know these people don't mean anything that they say. If you cannot acknowledge that your own side's been doing this and started it, I can't take you seriously on anything else.

I can't. Consistency is key. It doesn't matter whether you're on the right or left. You can still be on the left and have your leftist positions and you can be on the right and have your rightist positions, but you got to be consistent. Otherwise, you're just a damn hypocrite sellout and you shouldn't be taken seriously.

And she's one of them. I mean, I'll give Biden credit. He started this. I'll give him credit when he was vice president under Barack Obama and they were separating kids at the border. I mean, they could have ended the Flores agreement immediately so that people weren't renting a kid to get across the border.

But they didn't do that. So at least they at least they were trying to separate kids from these strange adults that they were coming across the border with because an inordinate amount. And there was an IG report on this that came out like two years into the practice that discovered that they were trying to separate kids from their kids. That's troubling. If you want to pretend to care about child sex trafficking, that's pretty bad.

Let's fast forward to today's times. I shared with you that New York Times article a couple of months ago. I've included in the prep email many times where they just discovered that about, you know, what, 80,000 kids went missing. No idea where they went. No idea. I'm not making that up.

That's not true. 80,000 kids went missing. No idea where they went.

No idea. I'm not making that up. That's the New York Times that wrote that, you know, that bastion of conservatism, more conservative than Reagan, the New York Times, right, Cain? That's their that's what they're known for their legacy. They wrote that. And they, they quoted, was it Becerra?

No, it wasn't Becerra, it was Mayorkas. They quoted him as as saying that he was upset that they were not properly fast forwarding. These kids through the process, efficiently enough, they thought it could go faster. And he said that Henry Ford would have been disappointed that it didn't run like a you know, like a conveyor system, assembly line. And, of course, now they can't account for all these kids.

It's just truly stunning. So I hear sound bites like that. And it makes me mad because I they don't care. These people don't actually care about illegal immigrants either. They don't care. They don't give a rat's ass what's happening down in Mexico.

You know what? They're sitting here defending the guy who snorts the stuff that is the number one product for the people sending people across the border. I mean, he's their number one customer. You got the cartel's number one customer, who is the son of the President of the United States. They're gonna act like they care how they fund the stuff that keeps it going.

It goes up their nose. Come on. Thanks for tuning in to today's edition of Dana Lash's Absurd Truth Podcast. If you haven't already, make sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.