Learning the Art of Refusal, Part 2

Genealogies could determine status between Gentiles and Jews.

I mean, Jews could hold over the head of the Gentiles. Look, we're connected to the apostles. We're in the same tribe as this one or that one. We are descendants of that same tribe that produced the great prophet. Can you imagine the potential conflict when Titus fulfills his mission from chapter 1 and verse 5 to appoint elders? He chooses that unconnected, unimpressive Gentile and overlooks Mr. So-and-so. One of the things Satan desires most for the church is for us to be divided and marked by strife.

Being aware of that is not enough. We need to take steps to combat strife. One of the greatest criticisms of Christianity from unbelievers is really a legitimate one. The church is so divided, Christians can't seem to get along. This was a growing problem in the church at Crete during Paul's day.

Paul wrote about it in the book of Titus. His warning to that church rings true for us today. One of the tools in our arsenal is learning to let go of minor issues. Stephen explores this and more today.

This lesson is called, Learning the Art of Refusal. Here's Stephen Davey with today's message. I just met this past week with one gentleman, a young police officer who, I'm not sure how he got started, but he began podcasting our sermons while on duty. He listened to them and one day he pulled over and accepted Jesus Christ as his savior. He and his wife are now coming.

It's all brand new. We have older believers and young brand new believers. We have people in that class born in the south.

People have moved here from the north, from the west, from up east. We have in this class Caucasian, African, Asian, Hispanic and a mixture of a lot of others. We have singles, we have married couples, we have parents with children and parents without children or couples without children. Some parents are homeschooling, some are sending their kids to public school and some are sending their kids to Christian school. I'm able to tell them, my wife and I did all three, homeschool, public school, Christian school and I can say, well all authority, none of them work. Perfectly, I'll add.

None of them work perfectly. The myriad of varieties represented in one new member's class and you're thinking, how in the world are we ever going to get along? Maybe you're wondering if we will. How did the believers on the island of Crete get along? You have descendants of Gentile pirates and historic Jewish converts. Some of them are poor, some of them are wealthy, some of them aren't educated.

Paul will mention one at the end of the letter that's an attorney, highly educated. Some are going to be people who grew up under the influence of the Essenes. I mean they were so liturgical. They had ceremony upon ceremony. They wouldn't eat a meal without ceremonial cleansing. They would come together and eat meals together wearing special clothing, ceremonially cleansed and that person gets converted, comes to faith, stands in the assembly next to a Gentile that doesn't bathe, period.

Right? You have people coming in with all kinds of religious traditions and some coming from idolatrous backgrounds. Everybody came into the faith and into that assembly by means of the cross where their sins were washed away. But opinions tend to stick.

Funny how that happens. Paul effectively tells Titus you're going to need to remind them that there are opinions and they may have a lineage of rabbinical traditions, but the word isn't going to really make that clear. They may have dearly held beliefs that may not be wrong, but are not to be communicated as the model.

Tell them what to leave at the buffet line and not take with them to the table. They're unprofitable. They are worthless. They're not going to bear spiritual fruit. Even if you win the argument, it will not advance the gospel. Without a clear text of scripture, the interpretation can take on an authority of whoever is dispensing it.

The rabbis of old with their volumes of opinions and speculations taught as doctrine, and you end up with a Noah and his family being protected by lions and feeding a king out of compassion with some huge monstrous animal in tow and a dove getting an olive leaf from the Garden of Eden. At the end of the day, none of that advances the gospel. I've shared recently with my Greenhouse class my growing opinion that we ought to be wearing white clothing. We're told in Revelation that our future wardrobe is going to be triumphant robes of white, clean linen, indicative of victory in battle.

In light of that coming day, why not? We ought to even now begin to wear white in anticipation of our final victory with Christ as we eventually come, Revelation 19 says, with Christ wearing white on stallions of white. So let's start wearing white clothing. Of course, they smile and they think, are you pulling my leg? And I'll laugh and say, of course I am, but could I be serious?

And I read a quote to them from one church leader who gathered a following in the second century, and he was serious as he preached and taught. And I quote, forsake colored clothing. Forsake colored clothing.

Remove everything in your wardrobe that is not white. He goes on though, no longer sleep on a soft pillow, nor take warm baths. If you are sincere about following Christ, and especially the newer believers will go, yeah, I'm sincere, tell me. If you are sincere about following Christ, never shave your beard. For to shave is an attempt to improve on the work of him who created us. I can't help but laugh when I read that quote, because I grew up in a circle of churches that believed that if you didn't shave, you were sinning. Any facial hair was tantamount to rebellion. I mean, if you were really sincere about following Christ, you shaved. And I can't help but laugh because here's a guy preaching in the second century that if you did shave, you were sinning. And guess what the Bible says about either side of that argument?

Nothing, unless you twist some scripture and come up with your own interpretation. Listen, in any generation, there are plenty of controversies that are really unfruitful. I haven't even mentioned whether or not global warming is make-believe, if drilling offshore is a good idea, gun control is a bad thing, if border control is a waste of money, if you should only be eating organic foods to prove you're really taking care of God's vessel, if you ought to be driving an electric car to show that you're really showing good sense in taking care of God's planet, if you're feeding your cats and your dogs expensive food that contains vegetables because your dog needs to eat vegetables like you do. Your dog needs to eat that cat, that's what he ought to eat. There's some controversy for you, I'll hear about that.

Let her rip. I mean, let's hash out our views on a thousand things, parenting styles, worship styles, personal convictions or preferences, an array of opinions and traditions and secondary issues that in an assembly can quickly elevate to becoming equal to doctrine. See, Jesus faced that. He told the Pharisees, you're teaching the traditions of men as doctrine. You're taking all your speculations and all of your opinions and you're elevating it to the level of this is God's truth.

It is fruitless. You see, the Apostle Paul has been around the block a few times. He's planted a few churches. He knows that Titus is going to face this kind of threat to the effective and fruitful ministry among the churches on the island of Crete, although the non-saving, secondary, non-doctrinal controversies are going to change their name over generations. I mean, isn't it true that the church is not so much defeated as she is distracted? We create controversy without any biblical injunction or even precedent and it just kind of shrivels up the demonstration of grace. No wonder Paul would say to the Ephesians, be diligent, here's something to really pursue, keep the unity of the Spirit and the bond of peace. No wonder he effectively reinforces to Titus, listen, develop the art of refusal, learn to say no.

You're going to be surrounded by a buffet of opinions and speculations. Stick to the word and not some strange, unique, original interpretation. Protect the church from loading up on a lot of stuff that will do nothing more than make her unprofitable and worthless. Secondly, verse 9 says to shun foolish controversies but also to avoid genealogies. Now this is going to affect especially the Jewish believer and the Jewish audience and I think there are ways that it would affect people in our community and you'll see why in a minute. The Jewish people meticulously investigated and documented their family lines, their family tree. It provided for them a sense of superiority. I belong to this tribe or that tribe or I'm a descendant of that clan or this clan and that would creep into the church as well if they weren't careful. Genealogies could determine status.

Ancestral dominance could lead into authority. This is going to be especially divisive between Gentiles and Jews. Jews could hold over the head of the Gentiles. Look, we're connected to the apostles. We're in the same tribe as this one or that one. We are descendants of that same tribe that produced the great prophet and we as the Jewish people gave you the word of God and it was through the royal tribe of Judah. We delivered the Messiah. So you got a guy who's descending from the tribe of Judah. He's converted. He comes into the church and he got this Gentile that's not related to anybody. Can you imagine the potential conflict when Titus fulfills his mission from chapter 1 and verse 5 to appoint elders? He chooses that unconnected, unimpressive Gentile and overlooks Mr. So-and-so who's descended from such and such a tribe. We tend to do that in different ways in the church.

Oh, you're connected to so-and-so or you make so much money or you do this or you do that and here's your title and you come in here and we'll just kind of roll out the red carpet. This is a distraction. In fact, the only genealogies that matter are those delivered to us in the word as it relates to proving that Jesus Christ through both Joseph and Mary had legal and familiar right to sit on the throne of David which is a messianic promise of a kingdom yet to come. The only genealogy that matters to any of us is that we belong to the family tree of God by faith in Christ. Amen?

I mean, that's it. That we have by receiving Jesus Christ become a child of God. We've been put in that family tree.

That matters. Paul effectively says start living now in light of the value of that family tree. Thirdly, Paul mentions the distraction of strife, verse 9. That's just kind of this categorical word.

If you felt like you've been able to slip around the other two, well, this one catches us all. Strife, fussing, quarreling, arguing. And you get the idea that Paul is warning the churches what not to do, but he's also implying, or at least it is in the text, there's the implication that the churches are already involved in this. And I would have little doubt they were because of the controversial nature of Titus' mission. Now, we learned in an earlier text that Paul is bringing to the body through Titus this encouragement to revel in the fact. You remember in a former study that they have been ambushed by the grace and goodness of God. They have been ambushed by a gracious God. So what did we learn from the example of our Lord? Well, we learned how to ambush people.

Did we learn how to ambush them with grace and kindness? Thought it was interesting and unrelated to my study, but Jim Cymbala is a man I wanted to use as an illustration. He pastors the church that his wife wrote the song the choir sang earlier, the Brooklyn Tabernacle, and he talked in an interview recently how he challenges the new members who join that church to not speak critically or unkindly about any other member instead of talking to them directly. He made this comment, to this day, every time we receive new members, I say much the same thing, and that's because I know what most easily destroys the church is not going to be crack cocaine, government oppression, or even a lack of funds. Rather, it is this kind of strife that grieves the spirit of God. Dwight Pentecost, a long-time professor of Bible exposition and a friend, tells of one church split that was so serious each side filed a lawsuit to dispossess the other side from church property. The church brought their case to civil court, and the judge, fortunately enough, threw it out, saying it didn't belong here, and so they took it to denominational leadership for church court. The court made its decision and awarded the church property to one of the two factions, and the losers withdrew and formed another church in the area. What was interesting and tragic was that in the course of the proceedings, I read the church leadership found that the origin of the conflict, the church conflict, had begun at a church dinner when an older church member received a smaller slice of meat than the child seated next to him, and an accusation was made, and it was responded to, and then it escalated, and then it became personal, and then people began to take sides with the older believer and then the younger child, and soon all kinds of things.

I mean, it was a real food fight. Strife began, accusations made, and the church divided. Strife is an ever-present potential distraction waiting to happen.

Paul knew it, and so he doesn't want to end the letter without saying, here are some things to avoid because they'll just lead to strife. Strife reduces the gospel to personality conflict. Strife dissolves the unity of the church into clicks and circles.

Strife refuses to listen to reason, and it kind of rides on rumor and emotion. I mean, I've been amazed at hearing some of the people at Greenhouses that we've met personally talk about some of the rumors they heard about this church, which kept them from coming for a while. One of them told me, we heard from somebody that used to come here that when the church service starts, they lock these doors and you cannot get out. I think that's a great idea, frankly. Another rumor was that if you go to that church, if you want to join, you've got to give the pastor a copy of your previous 1040 tax statement, and then he determines that you'll give up to 30%.

I thought that was a great idea too. I mean, some of these rumors have some real value to them. Can you imagine?

I mean, literally believing that stuff was true. Strife kind of invites the enemy inside the church. It isn't some wild rumor out there that's hurting us. It's when we invite him to come and join us. He's delighted to stir up trouble. In fact, he loves to engage in one of the seven things we're told by Proverbs or by Solomon in Proverbs 619 that he hates. The seventh in the list is that he hates the one who spreads strife, constantly stirring the pot. Strife literally invites the devil to church. And why would the devil ever need to attack a church that allows him to join?

One more. Paul adds a fourth and final word in this list of distractions. Avoid foolish controversies and genealogies and strife, now notice, and disputes about the law. The church, again, especially in this generation, is going to be embroiled and will be for decades in how the law of Moses applies to this dispensation. How does that old covenant relate to the new covenant?

How do what we do relate to what we're supposed to keep doing? They had all kinds of things to deal with. But there is a relationship to the church today and what do we find in the Bible in any one of these dispensations or these covenants that applies today?

And that's why careful study and patience and teaching is so critical. A major division has already been avoided that required a council in Acts chapter 15, as Peter and James and Paul will lead the congregation at large to a decision of wisdom and grace that no longer required Gentiles to effectively become Jews in order to be welcomed into the church. They would have debates for years of what you could or couldn't do on Saturday, the Sabbath. Those debates continue to this day. They would debate whether or not you could pick up a child and carry him to another room if that would be bearing a burden on the Sabbath, embroiled in all of these kinds of things, as the church shifted by Acts chapter 20 to worshiping on the Lord's Day, saying a long farewell to the synagogue and eventually to this meeting house of believers celebrating the resurrection of Jesus Christ. You can imagine in that transition period all kinds of heated debates and arguments. Titus was in the middle of it.

He was in the middle of it. He needed to stand against those who wanted the church to become just another new outpost of Judaism. It would corrupt the gospel.

It would destroy the grace of God. In fact, the Greek language uses this root word for disputes here, this fourth distraction. It's the same root word for sword. They both divide, don't they? And this word then carries this nuance of violence.

It carries this idea. In fact, it's even used for physical combat, war. It's the escalation that leads to harm. Chuck Swindoll, commenting on this verse, wrote that he was aware of two seminary students who were disciplined after their quarrel on the doctrine of sanctification escalated to a fist fight. I mean, how ironic is that? We're going to argue about how to live a holy life and I'm losing the argument because I'm going to punch you in the nose.

It makes a lot of sense. How tragic. You don't think the church today has the same propensity to disputing over non-essentials as they did on the island of Crete. In fact, don't do it. I'm not recommending you do it.

I did it in my study. Just search Google under the phrase, church fights, and then hang onto your hat. How tragic to see the bride of Christ tripping while she walks down the aisle, to see her shoes soiled and her dress torn and ripped and skirmish after skirmish, to see the bride of Christ embarrass her groom, to see the bride act in a way that you would never imagine a bride would act while waiting for her groom. Paul writes, avoid this, shun this, turn your face away from, don't get involved in, even though there are plenty of people in that buffet line and they're just loading it on, don't do it. Avoid foolish controversies and genealogies and strife and disputes about the law. And here's a strategy for avoiding all of it, this last phrase in verse 9, for they are unprofitable and worthless.

I could break that down quickly into two positive statements. Here's how to develop the art of refusal. Number one, be discerning. That is, stay within biblical boundaries. In other words, if the Bible is clearer and vocal then it is for all of us. If it isn't clear but the Spirit of God is leading you to something, make sure you're not violating other scripture but then do it.

Follow him. Don't turn it into a mandate or a model. If the Bible is for the most part quiet, we ought to follow suit. Give your energy, he said in verse 8, to deeds that the world can see, they can see those good deeds and glorify your Father who is in heaven.

That's profitable. Secondly, be determined. You're going to have to keep your focus on the mission. Paul uses a word here at the end of this verse that helps us evaluate what we've been arguing about, what we've been dividing over. He effectively says, notice this, look there, these kinds of distractions are unprofitable and worthless.

He uses a word to be translated fruitless, powerless, useless. So in the midst of the argument that you are attempting to win, who are you discipling? Who are you winning by faith in Christ to his church? How are you advancing the gospel of the grace of God? Well I'm not, and we're not, but we're winning the argument. Don't get overheated and all wrapped up and the point of distraction and discussions and opinions and debates that escalate and arguments and clicks and anger and division so that at the end of the day we really can't point to real, tangible, eternal, lasting, spiritual fruit.

Boy are we right. No wonder Paul would write, I implore you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling with which you've been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing tolerance for one another, and love, being diligent to preserve the unity of the spirit and the bond of peace. We're not laying down our doctrinal, cardinal issues, but be careful in all these other opinions, in this buffet line. Be determined. Stay within biblical boundaries. Be discerning.

Stay focused on the mission. These are some very practical principles, and I hope they encouraged you today. This is Wisdom for the Heart with Stephen Davey. The principles that you learn today are the things that children need to know and understand as well. However, children learn differently from adults, and often they learn best by hearing compelling stories. Stephen's son, Seth, has a children's book called The Great Cat Spat. It's a beautifully illustrated book that children will love and cherish.

And more importantly, it teaches children the important lesson that nobody wins when we end up in needless disputes. If you're a parent or grandparent, this book will make a great addition to your library of children's literature. We've also had listeners purchase this book so that they could donate it to their church library and give it as gifts to children and parents that they know. This book is available in the resource section of our website. And if you prefer, we can give you information on The Great Cat Spat when you call us today. Give us a call at 866-48-BIBLE. We'll help you get as many copies of this resource as you need. Once again, it's 866-48-BIBLE. The website that you can use is wisdomonline.org. Thanks again for listening today. Stephen will continue through this series from Titus 3 next time. Join us then here on Wisdom for the Heart. 🎵