Breaking Down Charles Davis’ NFL Mock Draft

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Not available in all states. He's bad. He's beautiful.

He's crazy. It's Rich Eisen. Let me ask you this question. This is the Rich Eisen Show.

Are wide receivers becoming the new running backs? In the link, DK Metcalf has demanded a trade. Live from the Rich Eisen Show studio in Los Angeles. Earlier on the show, senior writer for the MMQB, Albert Breer, 2025 NFL draft prospect, wide receiver Jimmy Horn Jr. Coming up, comedian Nick Thune. And now it's Rich Eisen. Power number three of this Thursday show.

First full week of March on the air 2025. Nick Thune. We haven't seen him. When was the last time he was on?

Oh, great question. Years ago, right? It's been a while. It's been a minute. 2019 or something.

No, longer before that, I think. At any rate, Nick, funny guy, funny, funny, funny guy. He is in our green room right now. He's going to come out and join us. He's a diehard Seattle sports fan.

His new special, Born Young, is available for streaming tomorrow on the Naitland YouTube channel. And he's also a part of the highly anticipated office spinoff, which is good news to hear for Nick. And just being on here means only great things for him because I was on running point and there got season two picked up and now they know what it's like to influence is basically what I'm saying. You know, honestly, I let off the Tom Brady roast. Look what happened. Good point. Most watched.

I was running point on the Brady roast before running point was ever out there. Facts. Please. That's what you do, though.

I influence and you, you keep it close to the vest. Nothing. I don't know anything. I get surprised. Like, oh, there's rich brother.

You have no idea what capers I call hold close to the vest. I'm saying then I just show up and then I get that. Oh, look, I saw, I saw you. I get texts all the time. Oh, I saw you on Netflix.

Thank you. I mean, why won't you share this with us though? Because I like, what do I, what do you want me to do? Come in here and tell you everything that's going on.

I want to know everything you're doing. But like, if you're saying, Hey, I'm going to go shoot this new max series about Jeanie Buss's life. I know that's pretty cool. It's Netflix. What'd I say? You said max. Oh, did I? My bad.

It's okay. Netflix. Just want to make sure my, my, my partners who I influence don't, don't get run over by having the wrong channel.

I don't know the difference in streaming nor do I know the difference between a decade and a century like yesterday. Listen, just, just if you want, if you want to know how to influence, just watch. I watch you every day, baby. Okay.

Just watch. Hey, uh, mock drafts. That's what we, we love mock drafts. I love them.

We love them. The only thing about a mock draft that, that I, I have to counsel people about is they're not real. Hence the term. No, no, no. They're not real. Like the, the, the real draft is April 24th. Everything else is just a mock and, and, and I don't mock mock drafts.

I appreciate them because they give you food for thought. I don't like the word mock being used for what you're like the kingdom. Are you going to call it fake draft? Yeah. Like fake draft. I don't mock. It's take offense. Why don't we call them for gazey drafts? There you go.

Rich eyes. That's it. There you go. I take offense by the word mock marking my draft.

You don't like it. That's true. There's another, there's another way that the word mock could be used. You know, there's a new meaning. There's a different meaning and you can be, you can misconstrue it in the same way that you could think this is a real draft. Exactly. Caught you with that one too, Chris, huh?

My draft. You never know when my callbacks are coming. That's how I influence. See, I just made a callback by pointing out my callbacks, but if someone's not familiar with your callback, is it truly, you know, that's true. Good point.

You know what though? It doesn't matter to me as long as I'm making myself laugh. That's all that matters. But I waste time by saying hello to you guys. 10 seconds at the start of my seconds.

Yeah, you do waste their time. Four minutes. We've been doing this. No, no, no, no. If you want to go back, if you want to run back how we spent our time in the third hour of this program, we started talking about it, how I'm an influencer.

All right. Well, we started with Nick Coons last appearance 2017. Listen, I know, I know Mindy Kaling's talented. I know Kate Hudson's talented. I know Ike Barenholtz is talented. I know the rest of the show running group is talented. I understand Netflix is a huge platform.

I understand Jeannie Buss has an interesting life that in the Lakers are very worldwide popular brand. If you're going to, if you're going to mock a show based on their their lives, people are going to be interested, but you include me, you get a second season. If I'm here and you're here, doesn't that make it our time? So that's how we spent the first five minutes.

I've now moved on to mock drafts, which are, by the way, what I'm about to show you is not real, but excited. One Cooper Eisen Patriot fan, Cooper Eisen, Celtic Patriot Yankee fan, because there had to be a beachhead somewhere in my house. And I'm very excited that Charles Davis thinks the first three picks of this draft are quarterbacks. And that Abdul Carter will be there for the Patriots to choose. And then the Jacksonville Jaguars just get Travis Hunter. And Mason Graham is another guy. Everyone gets pushed down one. By the way, Mason Graham and Christian Wilkins and Max Crosby is one way to look at what the Philadelphia Eagles did and say, it's coming for you twice a year, Patrick, within your own house.

And one time in your actual house. And then in our house, which, you know, Chiefs fans like to point out, it's kind of their house. Will Campbell becomes a jet Jalen Walker and two Georgia edge rushers back to back. And then Banks out of Texas is another O line, is that the Bears just continue hitting the O line. That's what Charles Davis thinks that Shadore Sanders will be the choice. Tennessee Titans first overall. Now they are the ones who pointed out that Shadore has what Brady-like qualities in terms of ball placement and accuracy and that sort of neck up abilities and things like that.

Okay. So if it goes after all this quarterback, quarterback, quarterback, Shadore first, Cam Ward second, Jackson Dart third, that the Giants, instead of taking the edge rusher or the unicorn wide receiver slash corner and sitting back and maybe trading back into the end of the first round for Jackson Dart. I can't believe this, this, this, um, this mock has earned Charles Davis a phone call. You would be so ecstatic if Abdul Carter winds up in new England and you don't have to make, you don't have to move. You just sit there and just let Joe Milton win games at the end, which was great for you. Cause you got a burst of excitement and it doesn't matter that you still get up to Carter at the end.

I was very not excited. You get the Joe Milton win in the Joe Milton game, which is up there with the snow game in terms of Patriot lore in Foxborough. Wow. And then, uh, and then Abdul Carter. Anyway, I think they're going to get one of the three, either Abdul Hunter or Mason Graham. And that is fantastic to sit there at four, have the number one overall pick plans.

Absolutely blown by a drug Mayo and no fault of Joe Milton. He's out there to play hard. Uh, and to get one of those three guys outstanding. And then TJ Jefferson. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. I mean, and then TJ Jefferson. Oh, did you see what Charles Davis says happens for the Dallas Cowboys 12th overall?

I did look at it this morning and there we go. It would be Ashton. Hey, I'm seeing Gente going anywhere from, I don't know, Chris, like eight to, to the Steelers at like 20. Oh yeah. I saw him down in the twenties wiggle room for him. Tyler Warren winding up as a Colt 14th overall Dallas Clark.

Next that's what that's a comforter. Yeah. Uh, men boo goes to Miami to protect Tua and, uh, will Johnson goes to Atlanta middle of the first round is a steal. And he's got the Michigan guys going back to back and Kenneth grant for Arizona.

Shamar Stewart, Walter Nolan, Tet McMillan is a wide receiver that goes to Tampa. He's in that like Evans mold that Nick Eamon worry that he was something else to put him in the back end of that defense next to the defensive player of the year. You know, Stacy had an interesting, uh, observation about Nick during the combine. She's like, he's like six three, but you look at him and you'd swear he's like six five.

She was like, it's so weird. He's so much bigger. He looks so much bigger. I stood next to him.

I thought it was Charles Oakley. Wow. I'm serious. He was impressive.

Like an app, an absolute Oak tree. Yeah. And then you got the, the back part of the draft Charles Davis. Thank you for the, for the content time. Charles appreciate it again.

This is not real. Everyone, uh, would be a corner for the Steelers. Uh, Jim Harbaugh makes it a reunion with Colston Loveland and gives them that weapon guys in there.

Rich cause you know, uh, we're pretty damn good. Uh, Josh Harmon from the Ohio state, Josh Simmons, pardon me, Derek Harmon, uh, become Packers and Vikings, uh, a Buka from Ohio state going to Houston to hook him up with CJ Stroud again. Um, that kid Gray's able from North Dakota state was really talented and would be a great pick for the Rams. Great pick James Pierce Jr. Who was wearing a hoodie and running a sub for four 40, which I thought to myself, that's a mistake because I wear a suit jacket and it creates a problem.

Felt like a parachute. Yeah. Um, but he still was terrific. He would be a Raven Donovan Jackson of the Ohio state to Detroit, Matthew golden to Washington. So it would be Deebo golden McLaurin Jayden Daniels, Zach Ertz, Brian Robinson Jr. Let's go. Dang.

Oh my goodness gracious. And of course, you know, um, the chiefs will take a tap in alignment and jihad Campbell of Alabama going to the Eagles would just be part and parcel of, again, you know, let's go to the SCC and let's get somebody who can just run downhill and hitch in the mouth. Well, he'll be an all pro next year.

So it's fine. Dude. He's got all pro capability. He actually worked out at the combine and he looked the part.

He'll be a monster. That's just how it goes. And that's your mock draft from Charles Davis. Nice work. A little bit of something for everybody. A little fun. I mean, pumping Jackson dart all the way up to third number three overall. That's the headline. That's a lot. That's the headline. Yeah. So we'll see. We'll see how the next month goes.

If that's ends up, you know, taking shape, but wow, throw it out there now is kind of, throwing a dart. Yeah. I know that's something you can't stop influencing. I'm sorry. I want to slow you down. Just, it just keeps pouring out of the influencing keeps pouring out.

What are you laughing about? It's the truth. I like it.

That's the truth. Just again, ask the makers of running point Randy and Sarasota, Florida. Let's take your call before we'll bring Nick through now. What's up, Randy. How are you, sir? By the way, you've already had me at hello with the throat clear. The throat clear means you mean business when I call Randy.

So what follows? I want to start by saying hello to TJ, Mike and Chris. And I'm sorry, Chris, that the Pistons beat yourself takes the other night. You guys are good. Amen.

I mean, I love Kate. I'm in fantasy. Are the Pistons are going to hook up with the next in the first round? Is that what it looks like right now? Because that would be what I've, that's what I've seen. And it seems like Steven is scared of that matchup.

I wouldn't blame Steven for being scared of that matchup, but that isn't, that isn't why I called. I did want to throw this out there. I'm probably just as big of a Michigan fan as you. I got a tattoo on my chest and I'm hoping Jack Stewart falls all the way down. I've seen a mock where he ends up in Detroit. Hey, if he winds up in Detroit, that would be perfect. They would, that's exactly what the, that's, that's like a Dan Campbell lion, man.

It would be, it would be a dream come true. But the reason why I called originally was the Brock Purdy situation that you guys were talking about earlier. I feel like you got to pay that, man. Yeah.

You know what I mean? How did the Dolphins and the Cowboys pay their quarterback max for doing nothing? And Purdy's been, sorry TJ, but Purdy's done it. Like you've got to pay that man.

Maybe Jared Goff money, maybe not max, but you got to pay that man. Randy, their point, and again, not to speak for you, Chris, but Chris's point is why should the Niners be held accountable for decisions that other teams made in his regard, in his mind recklessly, Randy, you know? All right, that's fair. Oh yeah.

But it's the market, it's the market, it's the real life market. So anybody right now, thanks for the call, Randy. Anybody right now, the Buffalo Bills, I, I would have loved a GoPro on Brandon Bean's face when somebody said to him, Saquon just crossed 20 million.

Yeah. He's probably like, come on. Or he doesn't and he has his own convictions and he's just could also say to James Cook, here's what we're going to do. I'll pay you what Saquon made last year and then you run for 2,000 yards and you help our MVP quarterback go to the Super Bowl. I'm not even going to tell you to win it. I'll just tell you to take us there, James. You run for 2,000 yards and you do what Saquon did. Beat the Chiefs in the playoffs and we'll talk. You do that and then I'll pay you 20 million. But I'll tell you what I, what the Eagles paid Saquon last year, which is less than 15, isn't it?

Am I wrong? It was 12 or 13. Whatever it was?

Yeah, it wasn't that much. I guess I should know that before I speak for Brandon Bean and give him a negotiating strategy because that's what I do. What am I doing right now, guys? What am I doing right now? Influencing.

Thank you. It's really simple. It's not an easy thing to do. It's not, but I make it look easy.

You're not even sweating, you know? I woke up influencing today. You know, honestly, Baker wakes up dangerous. I wake up influencing.

You know, to quote 50 Cent, you wake up, you stare at the ceiling, you're alive with a wonderful feeling and then you start to influence. 14.7 last year. There you go. I know you want 15 and I know that, I know that sounds, you know what, I'll give you the 15.

That three, it's the joke. What are you gonna do, the three for 45? No, I'll just say I'll pay you this, this year. Oh, one year.

Oh, interesting. Or, no, sure. I'll give you the three for 45. And then if you want the 20, go do that. What's the signing bonus?

I think, I think it'd be like 25 guaranteed something like that. Right. Correct. And then, you know, he could be like the Mike Del Tufo of running backs where he shows up once a week, right? And let everybody else outshine him and he doesn't care because he's feeding squirrels in the streets.

Am I wrong? I haven't done that recently. You haven't?

Just posted a video. At any rate, last week. All right, Nick Thune is now like, I'm sitting in the green room and they're talking about hand feeding squirrels. What's going on? It's time to bring Nick Thune out.

That's correct. Jerry Jones. All right, Nick Thune has a new comedy special, Born Young.

It's available tomorrow. We haven't seen him in forever and a day. It'll be great to chat with him.

And I'm sure, freak him out about DK Metcalf coming up next. Plus, every new Hyundai comes with America's best warranty and three years or 36,000 miles of limited complimentary maintenance. Don't think you can get away with all that?

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Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states. Nick Ranger dot com or just stop by the comedian Nick Thune's new special Born Young streaming tomorrow on the Nateland YouTube channel right here back on the Rich Dad show. It's been years since you've been here, man. I know.

Good to have you back here. You're still you're still a diehard Seattle sports fan. Still sports fan.

I mean, that's the Mariners or the offseason was not the ideal situation. Yeah. Justin Turner just put some light on that, which I thought was nice.

OK. I mean, it's good. It's good when, you know, when you actually have a player speak for what the fans are saying, like, why didn't you? You know, he said it just like we were a game away from the playoffs. And so what's going on? Why aren't you guys putting anyone in here?

What is going on? Do you think their coffee budget is so high? Yeah, that's what it is. Yeah, it's just if I mean, the food at the stadium is ridiculous in itself. It's such a great stadium.

It's so kid friendly and Dodger Stadium is like I have season tickets to the Dodgers. OK, I bring my son there and you got your son. He's 11 now. OK, just just last year. He was 10 and he's basically gone forwards ever, you know, every year.

But by the way, congratulations on not having Benjamin Button as a child. So but is he is he a Mariner fan or no? He's a Dodger fan. Oh, he's an L. How did we let this happen? I don't know.

How does this happen? Well, the other day he said it pretty great. We were driving and I was like, you're so he was like, it's too cold out. And I'm like, come on, you California, California kid. He's like, it's your fault. I'm a California kid. Well, that's true. I would imagine that it is your fault there. But it is your fault then that he's a Dodger fan.

Well, how do we get this happen? I'm a dog. I'm a Dodger fan. You are as well. Yeah, I've been a season ticket holder for like 15 years. OK, so you're legit in that regard.

Let me introduce you to our our audio executive sound man, Mike Del Tufo over there. He's been a diehard Yankee fan his entire life and is now proclaimed this year. Yeah, he's now a Dodger. I'm going Dodger.

Oh, you went over. You have to. Yeah, it's hard not to root for what you know is going to happen. Yeah, right to win again.

It's going to happen. Talk about a front runner, Nick. You should not allow him in. No, anyone's invited.

Thank you. That's what I love about going to Dodger Stadium. I like Nick already. I already like Nick.

Now I like him even more. OK. Yeah, right. I mean, I don't know if you guys saw on my Instagram, but I've got a big announcement today. I've been working with Clayton Kershaw to come out of retirement.

Yes. And the Dodgers want me to possibly come out and throw a pitch. No one from the organization has reached out to me.

The organization has reached out. OK, but you have a history of doing this. Yeah, of throwing a pitch nine years ago. I retired mine mound.

You retired. There you are right there. You can tell.

I mean, so you've got the bubble gum in the back pocket. Nicely done. Yeah. OK. And the first baseman's glove from Little League.

That's great. What are you throwing there? Is that a split finger or is it a cross slider? We got to get a slider. Yeah.

And I and I think that Chris put it best last time I was on the show. I threw it and it was it wasn't necessarily in the strike zone, but it was definitely a swinging strike. I mean, especially for a left hander. That's what you want to do when throw out a first pitch, Nick, is fool an imaginary hitter. Yeah.

You know what I mean? That's that's number one to do is throw a strike outside of that. You'd like to fool an imaginary hitter, which is what when I threw out a first pitch for the Dodgers, I I would have hit a right handed hitter, but the left hander would have swung over that. Yeah, probably would have got to it. Yeah, please. And the person who caught my first pitch, who I felt bad for. OK, I really felt bad.

I'm like bad for all those guys. I do. It's just like, you know, you're trying to get ready for a game.

And, you know, someone taps on the shoulder and goes some some today's the day. Yeah. Yeah. Some jamaica is thrown around a first pitch.

You need to stand there and block it. You know what I mean? It was Kenley Jansen, who was a well, I think it was the back catcher at the time. Yeah.

Oh, my God. Kenley Jansen has caught my garbage. I had there was a backup catcher for the Mariners. It was his second day called up that he caught mine and I ran and jumped.

And and you can see in the video on Larson. Is that what you just jumped up to hug him like, you know, I just jumped up to hug him. Like, you know, I just threw a great pitch and you can see his chin.

I basically take his chin out with my shoulder. Did you put him on the 15 day deal? Is that what you did?

He actually had to 5150 him because he had a bit of a concussion protocol. That's no good. No, but I took him out.

I'm worried I got injured. I was just telling everyone backstage I was just locked out of my room at the montage in Laguna Beach. Yeah. Come in the room. Yeah.

vacuuming. Oh, it'll be two minutes. You know, I'll just go on the patio and read and yeah, five minutes go by.

And I'm like, that's a long time. No one's in there. Doors locked, locked on the patio.

Construction happening on the pool. I mean, just drilling everywhere. You can't scream for help. No, no, no one will hear you. That sounds like a horror movie, right? No. And the phone I have to call to call the front desk.

You have to call a 1 800 number that gets fielded. Who knows where? This is terrible. And so I basically ripped the back door off, just really frantically trying to get in and I cut myself and Kershaw. Doesn't think, I mean, it's, it's not in my throwing hand. Okay, so now hold on a second. You really are talking about Clayton Kershaw is what you're saying. This is happening. Well Clayton came to see me perform.

Okay. While I opened for Nate. So I think, you know, people thought, oh, he's here to see Nate, but I thought, well, you know, he was here to see a show.

Damn straight. Yeah, he was here to see everybody. Right.

And he came backstage afterwards. And a lot was said. And so you use this as an opportunity to. Yeah. To what?

What did you? So you really are throwing out a first pitch? Well, no, they haven't asked.

No, and I didn't necessarily bring it up to Clayton either. But yeah, so let's make this happen. I think this is the right place to make it happen. Well, we've done it before. Yeah, you've done it before. I'm a season ticket holder, you know, teen years.

I made a Dodgers fan. I have a one. Yeah. You could have sent your son. How old?

What's your what's his name? Towns. You could have sent towns Thune to be a lifelong Mariners fan.

Yeah. Or we could have taken the train. We could have gone down to Anaheim. Yeah, you could have. It's not a bad ride. Get right off of the stadium.

You could have pulled a reverse Ohtani. Yeah. Who doesn't take the train?

I imagine. But you could have taken, you know, he takes a train. What if what if I don't think he does. He doesn't take the morning train. He doesn't take any train. There's nothing.

There's not a single train. What if Ohtani had signed with the Mariners? You know, I remember when people were like thinking that was possible because because Ichiro Ichiro was the first to make the trek across the Pacific and dominate the major real.

Yeah. And he did it in Seattle and he chose Seattle. He could have chosen wherever the hell he wanted.

He chose Seattle. And everybody thought he changed that city, too. I mean, the culture changed. It was just everything.

Absolutely phenomenal. I mean, and then they teased us with like pictures of them together, you know, and it just thought there's I could see it. I could see it being a thing, but also I could also then like who's going to turn down the Dodgers?

I mean, well, nobody. I mean, you saw a rookie pitch yesterday. I don't know if you saw.

Let me tell you the nominal. I saw him pitch. And I thought to my because again, my son who's 14, he's a diehard baseball fan. He's nuts.

And he's just like, Dad, you got to see this. And I'm glad because he came in and relief right after Yamamoto. Yamamoto pitched. Yamamoto pitched. And he pitched three. And then Rocky Sasaki steps there.

And he's throwing 98 letter high. And then some split finger that makes movements that it's hard to tell what's happening. It's hard to tell what's happening. And I'm like, get out of here. But then Ellie Dela Cruz, Rich Eisen's show favorite, nearly popped one out of the park. I saw that. Yeah. Well, he's amazing. That guy. We love him. Oh, my gosh.

Yeah, he is. So I love that stadium, too. I don't know if you've been with the Great American Ballpark in Cincinnati. I have not been there. Oh, so nice.

I have not been. Yeah. Yeah.

I don't know. Next time I'll be back to Dodger Stadium because you know, I'm a Yankee fan. I know. I saw one of the World Series, pal.

I saw I watched you. And I know that your son was there with you, too, right? Correct.

Yeah. I went to I went to Game one. No, no, I sold Game one. You sold Game one.

Always sell Game one. Why? Because I'd rather watch Game one at home and get a feel for everything and then go to Game two. So when Stanton went yard with a ball that scraped the sky to give the Yankees a lead and then they were actually up late, you were thinking to yourself, I'm so glad I wasn't there.

No, I was thinking, I wish I was there. Oh, OK. It happens almost every time. But I went to Game two of Mets, Game two Padres, Game two Yankees. Well, Game two of the Yankees, you know, when that game ended, that game ended when Cube came out of center field before the game.

That was the end of it. I said I turned to my son, who was still stinging from the night before, when as we were walking to the car, easily getting out of Dodger Stadium in five minutes, because we were one of the few people who were leaving the stadium. Everybody else was celebrating Freddie Freeman's home run like it was New Year's Eve.

And I turn on the way home. I'm like, this is going to be something you see the rest of your life, like the rest of your life. This home run you just saw this clip is going to be like at the beginning of every World Series open, just like we're seeing Gibson's home run.

Yeah, Gibby meet Freddie, dude. No, but a great call by by, you know, by Joe, you know, it was unreal. So just an incredible call. I watch and I every moment of that I have with me.

Like I watch I was watching that at home with my son and it was unreal. I was like, but the game two Padres game to match. Yeah, but Cube came out of center field and I turned to my son and I'm like, this game's over.

He goes, What do you mean? It's I haven't even pitch yet. I'm like, this game is absolutely over. It is over. There is no way the Yankees are winning today after Cube did what he did straight from center field all the way to the mound and just essentially Mike dropped. Yeah, no, that's the end of it. I looked at my friend and I said, I think this is one of the best moments of my life in the middle of it. I mean, the vibe of the stadium. It was just like we are. This is it.

We're in California. This is the dream. Oh, that was it. Yeah. Who was the one who was it? Who was the one who came on and said you didn't want to be fat? Joe, you get the phone call.

He came. Was it was it O'Shea? It might wasn't me. It might have been.

Didn't you say you don't want to be anybody after that? Yeah. Fat Joe got the call from me. The Yankees saying, hey, we need you to do the same thing. And then, of course, the Dodgers won that game, too.

They could have done Sinatra back and it wouldn't have mattered at that point. Yeah, that I mean, then the Dodgers I mean, they really laid into that. I mean, Kike and I forget the pitcher that was really in on it, too, but they really let him know. Well, the Dodgers are set to win again. I mean, there's no question about it.

You know, you need to stop this because you you're really upsetting me. He's not allowing the clip. Let him in.

No, don't let him in. He's like, go, Dodgers. Literally a New Jersey guy who just terrible.

What Jersey did he get? Who's been trolling on the Red Sox fan to his right. And the Met fan was in the corner to your right, Nick.

The state of New Jersey like for a decade on this program. And now he shows up. Go, go, go, go, Dodgers. Hey, my hat's at home. I got a Jersey.

I'm ready to go. Not allowed. I mean, this is the thing is people are allowed to make radical. People get sober and some people become Dodger fans. You're quite is there is there like a 10 step process to being a Dodger fan? Yeah. 12 steps. Yeah. First one is admitting that you've got a problem.

And that's what happened with the Yankees. I started drinking. Yeah, exactly. I'm sober now. I'm a doctor.

It's just an outrage. Yeah. And I'm and I'm sponsoring him, actually.

I'm telling you, you should kick him out of the meeting is what I'm saying. My dog's been sober three years. He had eaten a weed brownie once and he's been off weed brownies. Is that right?

You weaned him off. Yeah. Isn't that impressive? Very impressive. Yeah.

I just it just it just it angers me. So, OK, your your new specials available tomorrow on the Nate Land YouTube channel and you are going your show dates. Visit Nick Thune dot com. You're going to Columbus, Ohio next. Yeah. Tell him I said hi. Will you please?

I will. Yeah. That is a totally is a Michigan Wolverine. Completely disingenuous. Do not tell him I said hello.

No, at all. So actually, you should say my Michigan friend. Well, don't do that because they'll boo you off. I mean, I'll try it.

I'll get off the plane. I'll try it. I'll tell a few people. See what they say.

Yeah. See what they say. And you're in the office. They're going to think that it's like I'm threatening them.

Hey, Rich says hello. I know that. Right. Yeah.

Because I am such a threat. Are you're in the office spinoff. Is that correct? Yeah. Yeah, I am. OK. But it's it's I mean, I don't think you're allowed to talk about it.

Is that right? It's like Fight Club. Oh, I don't know. I just don't know. I don't know anything. And I was just it's like I have a fun little thing on it.

OK. Yeah. I don't want to get you in any trouble. I mean, I used to like want trouble.

And now I just now I don't want to make sense. You've got a child. You've got season tickets.

I mean, he got an electric bike. I mean, I don't want to lose this. I can't keep I can't stop it. You're going to sit through Andre Ethier.

You know what I mean? And when I say sat through, he was talented. But you knew this wasn't happening. Matt Kemp, you were there, right? These are years that you you watched and you were hoping for the Dodgers to actually break through. And they weren't the best. And they were getting through, getting through, but not to the point where you sense.

Yeah. That they could actually win these games when you watch the Astros come in your house and deny you. I was game seven. I was at game seven. That was one of the worst experiences.

Of course it was. You don't want to lose a game seven when you think you can actually win this thing. You don't want to go through. And then you hear and then for all the drama after that. Of course.

Wait, did I hear any garbage cans that night? Dave Roberts getting all the grief. Roberts get all the stuff that allows you to be so happy this year.

You lived through all of that. And you're going to let him walk in. You really are going to let him walk in now. Well, because I've been on the other side of it and I have lost so many times that I want to bring the losers in. But also, I mean, I'm from Seattle. I'm used to losing, you know, Portland as well. OK.

The Lakers, everyone's just dominated us over the years and years. So now to be on a team like this, I mean, then since they invited me and, you know, I'm not getting paid or anything. But I do feel like I'm part of the team.

And when you throw out the first pitch, I'll hand you the ball. There you go. Now. Yeah.

I don't think that's going to be a nice combo, actually. Perfect. Mm hmm. New Dodger fan coming in there. Now, I want you to know this, right?

We want we need to set you up for success here. What do you do when you're at a game? Would you sit and watch the celebration of the World Series if your team lost? Nick, just to repeat, I was down the right field line in the second game one.

Freddy Freeman's home run ball passed my sight line like almost because he was so gone. Yeah. There wasn't even that it wasn't even that high. You know what I mean? It was just a freaking laser.

Yeah. Right past my sight line. And off the bat, I cursed, despite being next to a 13 year old who I'm trying to raise properly and and cursed. And I'm like, that's gone. And as soon as it left the yard, I said to those who are kind enough to let me in their their sitting area.

Thank you for the evening. I was out literally thinking about how quick can I get on the one on one? Yeah. You know, and it should be quick because all the Dodger fans are just losing their minds and just, you know, grabbing my son and saying we're out. And he's somebody because I raised Susie and I, my wife and I raise our children correctly.

He's somebody that if we go to a game and a team is up by 38 and there's two minutes to go, game's not over yet. You got to stay. And he was out. Oh, yeah. Gone.

Does that answer your question? Well, yes. I stayed when the Astros won. I watched them on the field.

I watched him celebrate. Why? I don't know. Maybe it was the alcohol.

I don't know. But I know I know that afterwards that my friend and I, it was almost cleared out. We found our way down.

We were down on the stadium level. We were walking through the reserved area, checking every door of the boxes. Just like, hey, maybe one of these doors open and one of them opens up. Go in.

Hey. And, you know, you walk in and there's stairs down and we didn't really see anybody. There's all the sushi on the table and we're just hand in fist eating sushi. And all of a sudden this guy is behind us and we go, he goes, hey, do you guys mind leaving? And we were like, oh, yeah, sorry, we're in our 40s.

We should probably get out. And he was like, yeah, this is the Astros owner's box. Oh, leftover sushi of the Astros ownership. Yeah. Yeah. If they're going to be, you know, trash cans, you're going to take their leftover fish. I also had a bottle of kettle one in my jacket and I took it out to put down and he was like, just take it. Like, you know, they felt bad for us.

And, you know, just have it all. Would you mind leaving? Is what they said to you. Hey, man. No, I salute you. I salute you.

You're just going to just keep on trying doors. You see some leftover sushi. You're just going to start eating it. Yeah.

And then it wound up being the leftovers. It's kind of like what Juan Soto did when he stayed out and watched the celebration. Kind of knowing, like, right. You know, you know, because he just took it all in saying, I just know I'm going to go to the highest bidder and and and leave this team. He knew that at the time. Oh, yeah. He understands that. He's sitting over there. I don't even want to get started on that. Please don't get him started. So Nick Thune dot com to watch this man tour.

Born Young is available on the Nate Land YouTube channel starting tomorrow. Nick Thune. Everybody return to the show.

Thanks for having me. I'm going to a Dodger Stadium first pitch near you. We're going to make that happen. Ice that hand. Yeah. Yeah.

Ice that hand, man. Get in the zone. AutoZone. Welcome to the A to Z savings event at AutoZone. Yeah.

Happy to be here. Can I get some rotors? Would you like brake pads with that?

How much are the brake pads? Free with the rotors. Free. Really?

Really? Free. OK. I also need some oil. Would you like an oil filter with that?

Yeah. How much is that? Free with five quarts of oil. Free. Really?

Really? Free. It's part of the A to Z savings event. You might as well call it A to free at AutoZone. Get in the zone.

AutoZone. Restrictions apply. Let's talk turbo tax people. You might be sitting there going, wait a minute, Rich.

I don't get it. It's not April. Why am I thinking about my taxes now?

Why should I? Because with TurboTax, you can have an expert file for you as soon as today. You get a TurboTax expert's undivided attention when you use TurboTax, and they work on your return in real time. Once upon a time, taxes is all about waiting and wondering and worrying.

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Get an expert now on TurboTax.com. We've never done this, Mike. Are you ready to do this?

You told him about how you are the Bill Walsh of audio executives. You can't screw these up, okay? Yes. One at a time. Here we go. One at a time.

Your favorite catchphrase from the original Predator. Go ahead. Here's one.

If you please, we can kill it. All right. That's number one. Here's number two. Okay.

Get to the chopper. Okay. You can't hear them. Yes. You can't hear them.

So what I'm going to do, I'm going to, I'm doing this blindfolded. Wait a minute. The sound, wait a minute. Did Bill Walsh not have the volume up?

Did the Bill Walsh of sound engineers not have the volume up for the second? Oh, my God. We can kill it. This is not going well. Can you go?

Oh, there's a method to his madness. Do you want to try one more time now? Okay. Go ahead.

Go ahead. Okay. We can kill it. Okay.

If it bleeds, we can kill it. Okay. Here's the next one.

Get to the chopper. And here's the other one. Okay.

There's that one. Okay. Start bench cut. All right.

Get to the chopper. It's cut because it's only an incidental line. And the only reason we remember it is because he's Austrian. If any other actor on the history of the planet, and by the history of the planet, I mean the States. Because it's 1987, right?

So the only country that exists is the United States of America. Sure. If anybody else said get to the choppers, it wouldn't have been a line. It wouldn't have been a line.

It's only because he's Austrian. Cut, cut. It's superfluous.

Wow. We're going to bench. We're going to bench your one ugly anaphor. You're an ugly anaphor. Because I have to be a comedian.

I have to be a comedian of integrity who works from the highest point of intelligence. We only like that because we were all 16 and he swore. So what you're going to do is you're going to start, if it bleeds, we can kill it.

Because it's a succinct line, it furthers the plot, and it's done in a very naturalistic way. If it bleeds, we can kill it. Very well done. All right. There we go. Guys.

What a talk out. Now, for everybody else who comes in here on the Rich Eisen Show, we're going to show them. I'm setting the bar here. We're going to show them this start bench cut because you have raised the bar, Keegan-Michael Key.

Setting the bar right here. We're going to edit out Del Tufo Messer. We're going to edit that out. Can you edit that out? No.

No. It's too good. It's perfect.

All of Keegan-Michael Key's brilliant appearances on this program laugh out loud or on our YouTube channel. Please do us a favor and check it all out. Do you want to go to war, Milaki? You love that, right? Oh, that's right, babe. They all are. That was fun, right, guys?

I'm sending it. My favorite show to ever do is Richard Eisen. Richard Eisen.

Oh, my God. I forgot about that one. That's my favorite one.

That's my favorite one. Richard Eisen. Hold on a minute. I'm sending something to Hoskins to finish up the show here. Uh-oh. This is not good for one.

Every time he does that, one of us is in trouble. One of us is going to eat it. You know what?

Is that called, K? You will be sorry you said that. I doubt it. I probably won't. It's a regrettable comment.

It's regrettable. You just assume something. Well, my assumptions are usually on point when it comes to this particular man. This one you're not. This one you're absolutely not. You're way off.

No, I got it on my back. No. Come on, Paulie. Never.

Astro's owners, even the sushi behind them. Yeah. I mean, come on.

Yeah. At the Hyundai getaway sales event, get deals so right, it almost feels wrong. Now is the best time to get that Hyundai car or SUV you've always wanted. Plus, every new Hyundai comes with America's best warranty and three years at 36,000 miles of limited complimentary maintenance. You think you can get away with all that?

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Nicks and Lakers tonight in the downtown host dojo. You going? I don't think so. Oh, that means there was an option? You kind of paused.

There's lots going on in our world. I mean, just to... I went last week. I went last week. Oh, okay. It's all right. Plus, I'm not Spike's plus one. Maybe Jim Jackson is. He's on the Jim Jackson show. And we'll have to ask Jim whether or not you should sign him cursing you out. So you're not going to the game tonight?

I am not, no. Your boy's in town. Who's my boy? Carl Anthony Towns?

Yeah. It's okay. I don't need to reach out to him.

It's all right. He's going to reach out to you. Chris in California, you're on the Rich Ozzenshow. What's up, Chris? Hey, what's going on, Rich? What's going on, man? Dude, it's an honor and a privilege to talk to you once again.

I called you last year. I don't know if you remember not advocating for Pickett to go to Philly, right? It was a good outcome. Yeah, well, I mean, him taking the victory formation knee for a Super Bowl, that's a pretty good outcome. I'd agree. I mean, well, the thing is he was pretty much handcuffed and it was kind of painful to watch.

And that just brings me to my point and I'll make it quick. You know, I'm a football fan, I'm an Eagles fan, but I'm also a Kenny Pickett fan. And I just want to see him get his fair opportunity and just change the narrative of him being a backup or, you know, small hands, whatever the negative narrative they got going around him. I'd like for him to get a fair opportunity and change that.

Howie and Mickey Loomis need to get on the same page and get perhaps a trade happen for Pickett to go to New Orleans so he can just rejoin Kellen Moore and Doug Nussmeier. What is your thought on that? Interesting, Chris. We'll see. You know what?

Thanks for the call. Saints quarterback situation isn't getting a lot of run. It's not. It should. I heard at the combine they really like Spencer Rattler a lot. Really?

Yeah. He got his brains beaten in and handled it. He did. But, you know, Kellen Moore is the new sheriff there.

And if he really likes Kenny Pickett, then maybe you should go get him. But, you know, the last thing that Howie Rosen wants to do, send his backup quarterback away. Because, I mean, the Eagles aren't going to play the Cowboys every game and have Tanner McKee throw two touchdowns against him.

You know what I mean? I mean, Tanner McKee might, you know, I mean, was that Tanner McKee just doing Tanner McKee things or is it the Dallas Cowboys just letting Tanner McKee do Tanner McKee things? What was it, Chris?

What would you say it was? Bottom line is, by the way, you don't trade your backup quarterback away. Not in today's episode. I understand that you've got a diehard fan saying Kenny Pickett deserves a shot. You know, I get it. But you're not going to in this day and age send your backup quarterback away. Send your backup quarterback away.

You need a good one. The last three, four years, what, 60 quarterbacks have started games? Exactly. You can't. You're not doing that.

You can't give away your backup. Are you going to sign, is it going to be Cooper Rush season again in Dallas? You're going to re-sign him? What's going to happen with Trey Lance, do you think?

Great question there. He'll be somebody's backup next year. You think? He'll be on a roster. Maybe he's Dallas' backup. I don't know if Cooper Rush will be one of those free agents they're all out on.

All out? I mean. You gave up, what, a fourth round pick for Trey Lance?

What was it? Nothing like that. I don't know. We're not just going to waste that and cut him.

Yeah, I'm kind of wondering what. Dude, you're just not trading backup quarterbacks. But the Saints quarterback situation, is it Derek Carr? Could it be Spencer Rattler? Could it be Derek Carr gets thrown on the pile with everybody else in time for next week?

And then what happens there? Does he wind up maybe a jet? Could it be Chidor?

Could it be Chidor? Wow. I've seen a mock draft of him at nine.

So you know, I think all of that's in play. It's not a call to mock draft, Chris. It's a fugazi draft. Fugazi draft. Fugazi draft.

Okay, the twisted. If we don't start it, who's going to start it? Fugazi draft. I like it. If not us.

Who? Yeah. And if not now, when? Does that mean you're going to do a fugazi draft? Oh, 100%. 1.0?

Has to. No, that's a come at me draft. As you know, I always do my come at me draft. Remember the one year we all did a draft and we all made the picks for the first round? That was fun. That was pretty fun. Do you know what we're going to do?

But we're not influencers. I'm going to FaceTime Mike Mayock recorded me asking him to do the first ever Rich Eisen show fugazi draft. Oh, that's fantastic. See what he says? Hey, if he says yes, it's great. If he says no, that's also content. And the only person who thinks of something like that can be called an influencer. No lies have been spoken, Rich. Or detected.