Superchargers, headlights, and more. With over 122 million parts, eBay Motors has everything you need to maintain your vehicle and level it up to peak performance. And with eBay Guaranteed Fit, your part is guaranteed to fit your ride every time or your money back. Stay on your A-game with all the parts you need at the prices you want.
It's easy to bring home huge wins. Keep your ride or die alive at eBayMotors.com. Eligible items only. Exclusions apply.
See eBayMotors.com. Sirius XM NBA radio host, Frank Isola. Coming up from the new HBO comedy specials, Someday You'll Die. Comedian, Nikki Glaser.
From FX's The Veil. Actor, Josh Charles. And now, it's Rich Eisen. Our number two, The Rich Eisen Show is on the air and this hour is going to be, as the kids say, lit. And I just had a very nice chat in our green room with Nikki Glaser coming out here after crushing the roast. Did you see, by the way, I should mention, it's not just talking about the roast.
Nikki Glaser's Someday You'll Die, which is a very inspiring title. Kyle Shanahan is opening for her. By the way, that's a good one. And he was at the roast.
I know. And Sarah wrote that for you. Kyle Shanahan is good.
He didn't come up with that, Rich. Kyle Shanahan basically saying, who's going to be your starter? I don't know. We could all be dead by Sunday. I'm not telling you. Is that what that was about?
That's pretty much what it was, yeah. At any rate, Nikki Glaser's Someday You'll Die debuts on HBO and Max tomorrow night at 10 p.m. Eastern time. She's at the Hollywood Palladium tomorrow night as part of the Netflix is a joke festival, which has just been fantastic. Let's start our hour this way as well, because you and I last night with our respective much better halves, you with Sarah Tiano, who was in the writer's room for the Brady roast. And Susie was there with me because we love Jeff Ross.
And he performed his one man performance, Take a Banana for the Ride, you know, last night, a one man show. And he did it at the Hollywood Cemetery. Yeah, Hollywood Forever Cemetery. Where, by the way, many luminaries from our world are interred, including Mel Blanc, who is right in front of his headstone, does, in fact, read the voice of Bugs Bunny in so many characters of Looney Tunes. His headstone does, in fact, read That's All, Folks. I swear to God it does. You saw it.
I saw the part right in front of it. That's awful. I mean, it's like a roast. That's All, Folks. It says on his headstone. He's got a nice spot right next to the street. It's really perfect. It's right there. It's right there. I'm sure the exhaust fumes of your car got all over Mel Blanc's headstone.
How dare you? No doubt. And so, but it is a one man show that is just like Jeffrey Ross in real life. Again, you know, he's the Roastmaster General, Roast J. Simpson or otherwise, as he said when he was on the show Monday, The Real Killer or The Juice, J-E-W-C-E. Those were his other options to put on his number 32 Bill's jersey that he came out in as he introduced himself or he got introduced to the Brady roast. But he is just a sweetheart of a human with a huge heart. And this is his life story. And where he talks about his upbringing in New Jersey and his parents and his parents died while he was young in life.
Both of them, just a few separate. And then this ring on his hand that I never asked him about. It's like a wing nut or something like that. It's a bolt from a German U-boat that his grandfather's in the Navy, worked in the shipyards.
And when they captured one of these boats in World War II, they were taking it apart to kind of learn the German technology. And his grandfather took one of the bolts as kind of a like a weird memento and kind of shaved it down into a ring and always wore it. And right before he passed away, gave it to Jeff. And Jeff lived with his grandfather after his parents died. And he tells these stories and then of course, winds up roasting them and roasts himself. And so you never know when he's being so poignant about his life and then switches straight up with the most inappropriate roast-like joke after it. The one about the deer. He knew it was his mom.
Right. And how he has German shepherds. He rescued German shepherds.
And he talked about how he has a Nazi dog and how if somebody breaks into the house, the dog will in fact show the intruder the location of the Jewish person in the house. It's just, it's wild. You're literally crying one second and then laughing at the most inappropriate joke.
And then crying again because he's telling the most poignant stories about the most important people in his family life. And it's called Take a Banana for the Rut because his grandfather always said, you know, wherever you're going, you never know. You might get lost. You might need something to eat. Yeah, your blood sugar's a little low.
Take a banana for the rut. It's beautiful if he travels around with this one-man show and if you have an opportunity to see it, you should. Absolutely. Last time he was in the studio, he told us a little bit about that that's what was going to happen with his show. He did, right. Yeah, when he was with Susie, right?
Right. And again, because I think Kevin Hart did mention during the roast on Sunday night that he's got this one-man show and he's going to do it in the Hollywood cemetery. And people are like, ah, isn't that funny?
That's a part of the roast. And he's like, no, that's really happening. And then last night we went there and no, we really did that. We really did that. Yeah.
It was packed. It was great. Yeah, there it is. Jeff Ross, Take a Banana for the Rut. Peeling back the thick skin of America's roast master.
It is beautiful. Yeah. He calls humor his superpower and, you know, TJ, like any superhero movie, there's our origin stories.
Yeah. And this was Jeff's origin story into comedy. And it was so well done. It was great. It was a lot of fun. It was a lot of fun. So again, that was last night.
And then we're just reliving the roast here and we'll do that with, uh, with Nikki Glaser. Um, you know, Edelman said, um, when he made an appearance yesterday, I believe it was on, uh, Colin's show. He was in studio that, um, things were a little dicey would, or at least they felt it was going to be dicey between Belichick and, and Kraft. And then it, you know, I, I heard was this maybe last night or whatever, I don't know if I'm telling any tales out of school that Belichick really looked like he didn't want to do a shot with Kraft. Not because he didn't want to do a shot with Kraft is he's not a tequila guy. Is that what I heard last night? He's more of a, like, he's like, I guess he and I are the same.
Tequila is a night ender for me, man. That's what you said. I've heard that. You can see he gave it away. Like he's not, it was like, yeah, non tequila guy.
And people thought like he was just not, I don't want to toast with Bob Kraft. Right. Right. He just, but he just, apparently he's more like a red wine guy. Like, like yours truly. Yeah. Like kind of a wine and beer guy, not so much. Yeah. Again, I'm, I'm probably revealing my, a little too much about myself. Yeah.
Peeling back that layer. Tequila is rough for me. But that's what I heard.
Tequila won the night. Plus he had one already, didn't he? He did one like a couple of minutes before with Gronk. Yeah. Which, and that's when they spiked the glass, you know, and he must be like, again, I got to go back to Keelan again. Right. Right. Still drunk. So the, the, the modern day Lombardi. He was laughing so much at the jokes after it. Cause he had had a few shots. Right.
He's not the modern day Don Julio. Hey. I heard that.
And I also heard as well, um, that there were no guard rails about don't go at, don't, don't make any massage jokes about Bob Kraft, which is why Jeff Ross made one. Right. And I heard that as well. And Tom and Jeff are partners. So you think of Tom was actually. Right. Again, Tom Brady is owning the, he owns this roast now. Yeah. Everything roast going forward is co-owned and co-produced by Tom Brady and Jeff Ross. Yeah. So by the way, two goats in their own, uh, respective good, good business. Right. I like it.
Right. With, with Tom Brady and Jew Bledsoe, which is what Brady called Jeffrey Ross on Sunday night. Again, telling roast jokes days after the roast, it's just now, now it's, it's, it doesn't sound great, but on Sunday night, it's like, I'm Bob, my sides are splitting.
Did you find it interesting? Some of the people who thought the roast had gone too far or like, I found it was maybe a younger generation of people who are like, man, some of these jokes were just straight up mean. And I'm like, it's kind of what a roast is.
It's what a roast is. And they're, they used to be when, when we grew up, you know, there were the Dean Martin roasts. Now they weren't nearly as, they're not nasty, the Dean Martin roast, cause they were for broadcast, but the real Friars Club roasts back in the day were awful in terms of the language.
Awful. Like some people that you used to grow up with. I, I've been told by many, you know, comedians and Friars Club members that Milton Berle was the worst of the worst. I've heard some Milton Berle stuff. Yeah.
Like he was, he was, you know, like Uncle Miltie, which is what I grew up watching him, you know, on like Johnny Carson, by any rate, you know, Uncle Miltie would be for the kids. And then the Comedy Central roasts used to happen all the time. Yeah. I think Jeff said this was the first roast in a couple of years. It's been a while.
I think the Alec Baldwin was the last one, like five years ago. So meanwhile, everybody's, do you know where Brady is right now? I saw that he's in Italy, right? Tom Brady is living his best life. He is in fact in, in Venice. Well, he's been doing that since 2000. You know where I saw that?
I saw that on Instagram, yep. Where it's time for us to, before we bring in Nikki Glaser, to check on our homework from yesterday's show. Jay, you aren't here.
Right. But the man who normally sits in that chair, we finally brought to the Rich Eisen Show viewership and listenership. We finally brought out what we have been talking about behind his back. Well actually, Rich, one day when Siciliana was in the chair, we danced around this subject. We didn't full on go in like we did yesterday. I hit the bullseye.
We just danced around it. Every single one of his posts on Instagram, no matter what it is, whether it's him like selfing himself, driving, or whatever it is, no matter what it is, it's always between 400 and 500 likes. Yeah.
There's a nice perfect range. As a matter of fact, Hoskins, you have the one that I sent you from this very morning, a perfect example, a perfect example. He, did you see his latest post today?
No. It's a shot of his friend, I think Sean, who I've never heard of before. And it's a bad, it's a bad photograph. It's half of his friend's face showing off his friend's vinyl collection. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's just a box of, it's just a box of, of, of records.
No, this was four days ago. 436 likes. Why would this get any likes? It's, it's a terrible photograph.
It's a shot of a guy's garage. You can't even tell what, what they are. Okay.
And another example of just like how weird it is, is again, I don't toot my own horn here, but I kind of feel like with my follow ship being like five X of his and a shot of me sitting at this desk with the Larry O'Brien trophy on it should get more than this schmecky friend Sean with all the respect and his schmecky boxes of schmecky albums. Like that's all, that's all I get. That's all. And by the way, you can see the dots at the bottom.
There were two, it was like a carousel and two shots of Kill Board. I feel your pain on that one, Rich. What? I only get, I only get likes if I post a picture of me with a celebrity other than that, 25, 26. I mean, are Mike's fans more engaged with him and his friend, Sean and the boxes of albums you can't even see? Fans. I mean, so we basically say you're buying this stuff, man. You're buying this stuff. Yeah.
Yeah. Cause again, his Instagram, his Instagram posts are, are like the Price is Right range finder game. Like it goes up. It's like this, this range of 100 and you got to, you hit the button and normally the likes will just show up in between that range. I'm telling you, Mike literally went from like 2,300 followers, right?
I used to like, I don't know why I look. Now he's got 50? The next day he was up to like 45,000 and I'm like, and he was like, oh, I had some reels go viral.
In case you're wondering, we threw it out. And he also said he has a person in New York. He's got a social media person, a guy in New York. You have multiple people in India.
In New York. Who were like liking. So we decided on, on our live air, TJ and I got up and got behind Chris and Mike and Mike took a selfie and we posted it all on our respective Instagram accounts and the Rich Eyes and Show account. And in terms of followership, most followers, it goes me, show, Mike, then you? No, me. You TJ? I think I'm at the bottom. And then you, Chris?
I've got about 2,800. Because you, you don't have any friends and TJ knows everybody. Exactly. They know me in these streets.
They certainly do. My God, it's every day. So we decided to post it on all five of our accounts and now it's time to reveal the, the, the results. Which one are you on first? TJ. TJ first. The photograph on TJ's Instagram account is 214.
I like somebody. Adam Jant 72 just said D's nuts. Another one.
I'm not the bot you're looking for was another quality responses to the commenters. They really brought it up. What do we have next up? Okay, good. That's the update.
Chris Brockman has how many likes on his Instagram account? It's 217. All right.
Somebody said, put the, put, put this guy on a duck boat with scalabrine. Good comment. You're up to 237. Very good.
Is there up to date? You always want to be current. What do we have next? Who's next?
Who's next? We got me. Let's do me. All right.
My my number is 530. Okay. Rich. You're up to five seven. I like that.
The answer is saying I like Del Tufo's picture better. That's a good one. Okay. Uh huh. Okay.
Notorious MDT, Brock steady, jiggy, and mr accessible. That's me. That's you. Thank you. That's what Jerry referred to me on the old weekend update.
Apparently that he likes because I'm accessible. Um, our show account, um, is not ready. Okay.
So which one do you want to do here? Del Tufo, Mike Del Tufo. This is the, this is the revealing. Who cares what the show account is. It's just definitely can't be enough. 667.
Not a bot. I like the one at the bottom. Red wing nut photo like number five 19.
That's a lot of Russian dressing. Smitchers in on it. He liked it on everybody.
Oh, he, he raised all boats. I'm going to be honest with somebody. Somebody left a message saying there was one person who didn't like the pictures on all of her pages and it was you.
Is that right? We liked all the pictures. I was too busy. I got things to do. You're confused. What was happening?
I saw you guys all post them and I'm like, what is going on over there? Here's the weird thing. This show Instagram page only has 165. I don't understand that. That makes no sense to me. Okay.
Well, Tufo's is almost at 700. He's totally for Gazi. All right, let's take a break here. Well, it's just, you know what? It's just, it has, it's, it's not an us problem.
It's him problem. I mean, he's not even here, but maybe we'll get a light for a follow from Nikki and then they'll help boost our engagement. There you go. TJ speaking into existence. Nikki Glaser is here. Tom Brady is in Venice. Tom Brady is in Venice.
Unbelievable. Living his best life. Everybody's like wondering where could he possibly be hiding right now? And we were in the cemetery last night.
Yeah, we were in a cemetery and he's at the grand canal right now. And the, uh, the lady who was looking for a lottery ticket on Sunday night is in our green room. Nikki Glaser about to come out here next on the rich eyes and show what's up everyone.
It's reality. Steve, your number one source for all things bachelor nation and reality TV every day, I'm giving you the behind the scenes juice and your info on all your bachelor nation stories. And also interviewing some of your favorite reality stars.
My name has been synonymous with spoilers, but I'm so much more than that. Give me a listen. The reality Steve podcast part of the believe network.
Just search B L E A V on YouTube or wherever you listen. Afford anything talks about how to avoid common pitfalls, how to refine your mental models and how to think about how to think certainly you can mess up on a million dollars a year. It is far less likely than it is on $30,000 a year. I would meet wonderful people that were struggling with a budget that was super tight.
It was a hundred percent. You need to make more money, make smarter choices and build a better life. Afford anything wherever you listen. Say hello to the one who destroyed the Kia forum on Sunday night and the Brady roast and a new comedy special on HBO and max debuts tomorrow night. Nikki Glaser, someday you'll die. Good to see you, Nikki. It's so great to be here.
I'm so great. What way, what way is it? I mean, I just think about, you know, I'm going to be 40 in three weeks and it's just this age where I'm supposed to kind of think about, you know, it's, it's, it's do or die right now. If I'm going to have kids, I think it's pretty much die at this point. But, um, and, and I think about the struggle and I talk about to my male comic friends about career versus family, cause you kind of have to choose sometimes and, and juggle that.
And, um, my male comic friends who are like, I think I want to be, I think I want to kids. I want to be a dad. I'm just like, like, I would want to be a dad too. Like it's, it's, you don't have to be as ever present and, and let's just, you know, and also the physical aspect of it is just really just, I know it's over after nine months, but it's not really, it's, it's over after, you know, you stopped breastfeeding, I guess, but like, it's torturous. And I just feel like I would want to do it the best because I don't do things half acidly. By the way, I noticed that I've noticed that about you, Nikki Glaser. I don't think I'd be a good, I don't think I'd do it the best.
I don't think I have the energy for it, but I think I could be a really great dad though. So, okay. So it all basically just have to be half present.
Is that what you're saying? You know, it's just less, you just, it's, it's, I'm not mad about it. I just want to make sure that dads aren't offended that this is just the way it is. It's just our gender roles that we fall into. And there are some dads that are like, do just as much as moms cause their wives are dead or something, but it's usually it doesn't happen otherwise.
It just isn't that way, you know? And so I would like to be a dad. I, you know, there's a part of me that's like, Oh, if I was like in a lesbian relationship, I think I could probably be a mom in that way because I could have a more maternal figure.
But yeah, I just don't think I'm cut out for motherhood once I kind of think of I've, I've given it a lot of thought and I'm thinking I'm ready to just, yeah, just a tap out. I could adopt, you know, like the adoption thing is interesting to me because if my kid like fails in some way, I won't take it personally. I'll just be like, this is their birth mother is stupid.
I guess it's not my genetics. You have plausible deniability understood better for the kid. You know, like I think so much of our trauma comes from the fact that our parents are so like, you're me be smart, be successful. Cause you are an extension of me. So if your kid is just dumb or not good at stuff, you're just like, ah, that's their parents' fault.
It's not, that's, and you just are more lax about it. I think Gronk's up for adoption. Actually, I think you might, you might, you might be able to put in some papers for Gronk. He was amazing. Oh my God. Like totally fit the role that we carved out for him and then went up and delivered in his own way while also still playing into that character that we had built up, which is essentially him. I think we nailed it, but really he did play into it. And his moments of God, I just watched his set again yesterday because you know, I'm watching it from the side.
So I didn't get the full show that everyone else got. So I, I went back and watched, I don't watch my own stuff, but I went back and watched everyone else. And it was just, his was so, I couldn't get over how adorable he was when he would say a joke that he wrote and goes, and I wrote that one. And I know that pride of like, but no, but everyone needs to know.
I wrote that one. Like, cause these guys aren't writing their own jokes mainly, but he should have pride in that because he wrote a couple as he told us great jokes. Well, he, he, he did speak as if he had just made a boom, boom in the toilet.
You know what I mean? Like, he's just so proud of what he's made. You know, like look at me. I was really, I can write, I can talk and write. There was something very childlike about it. That's exactly what I'm saying. Adorable.
It's yeah, it reminds me of a kid and the, the energy in that building, you and I were talking about it in the green room a little bit. And the first moment though, I mean, the jokes were landing, obviously Kevin Hart crushed it. He did it. What every, uh, roast master has to do the host, which is clear the space for folks like yourself to just be as wild as you want to be. Cause he's kind of set the tone. He's cleared the space. He's the first one who made a divorce joke, a jujitsu coach joke, all of that stuff.
So you could backfill and do what you want to do. And uh, obviously Jeff Ross coming out as roast J Simpson and then drew Bledsoe doing his thing was great too. But the first joke that brought down the complete house was you doing the Gronk joke about crypto, you know, and, and that was the one where everybody in the lower bowl got it. And then the upper bowl just I'll never, I'm getting goosebumps just talking about the upper bowl. You just heard the laughter from up there.
It was like a, it's like a starburst where it took a light year to hit the stage. You know what I'm saying? And that was, did you, did you feel that when I did, you know, I will say that there was no point that I was going to let up and go, Oh, I've got it. You know, like it's over. It was like the whole thing is a performance that you have to stay present and focused for. And not until I say good night, am I really done and can say I did a good job. So, but there were moments within the set that I go, okay. Cause I'd run it up so many times, probably 40 times.
And that said exactly, I'd never run because it's, we're making changes always. So even to the last minute, I'm adding things like right before, as I'm getting mic'd, I'm still typing in new transition lines. And so, but that was the first time I delivered it at that. And it had gone that well, and I had run it all over town five times a night for a week and a half at least. And then even before that I was messing around with it, but it was the first time it had been that perfect. And then when that joke, there's moments where I don't, I didn't expect the laughter to keep going or to have those, you know, Kevin getting up and running around. And, and so it, it, it messed up my timing a little bit, but did it. And I was just, it made me more present because I watched, I saw one clip of myself that I watched and I don't like to watch myself, but when Kevin, when I said the thing about the rock and Kevin and literally like saying that there was five pounds of seminal fluid within of the rocks within Kevin Hart's body.
I mean, it's a disgusting joke. And I knew that joke was a crusher because it was always the one when I was in the clubs that would like, it would open up the set, you know, you got to build up to it and that would crack it open. So you were working the material in clubs leading up?
Yeah. And it's, it's an interesting process because, and I've done it before I've done three rows prior to this. So I kind of had a system where you just go, Hey guys, I'm doing the roast of Tom Brady. They applaud. I go, can I try some roast jokes? They kind of get invested. Like you guys are going to be my focus group for this and they're, Oh yeah.
Okay. Here's, who's going to be there. It's going to be, you know, Kevin Hart is hosting, it's Rob Gronkowski. It's Randy Moss. It's Drew Bledsoe. It's Julian Edelman.
Those are football players, girls. I didn't know either that a laugh on that, you know, you kind of get a little couple left setting it up and you go and here's the Drew Bledsoe backstory. So you understand the jokes about him.
He was injured. That's why we even know Tom Brady. So you had to give him the backstory? I literally had to be like, okay, I had some jokes about Sam Jay that didn't make it, but I'm like, Sam Jay is a lesbian black woman with short hair. That's all you need to know about her for this joke. There's multitudes more to know about her. She's hilarious.
She's so talented and kind and incredible. But for that joke to hit, you just need to know that like it was, it was setting the stage. And then you, you, you go in next time, I'm going to print up pictures.
So I don't have to do any of that. And so if there are jokes based on looks, just pictures, because you really can't get a feel for it because most people don't know who Drew Bledsoe is, you know, when you're doing a set on a night, you know, at the Laugh Factory at 11 PM on a Friday night, it's all like, no, no, no one would know. And so it was that was the process. And then, so I knew that Kevin Hart joke would hit because it was always hitting and everyone's familiar with Kevin Hart and the Rock and their relationship. But I didn't expect like his reaction was just so like warm and he, I knew he had good reactions because I went to the Mark Twain prize for him like a month or two ago that he's, it's, it's coming out on Saturday on Netflix.
It's so funny. But I saw how he interacted with people kind of roasting him at that. And I was like, oh, he's a giver. Like, he's not going to be like, or he's not even just going to go like Tom Brady, like like animatronic, he had two settings, like smile and smile with a nod. Like he was like, laugh one or laugh two. Which one was him screaming inside the most?
Oh man, the whole thing, man, dude, ah, his veneers are going to need a touch up because he was grinding them so hard. They are going to have some fissures going because I, you know, I don't know what you thought you thought about it, but it felt to me, I could only see the side view of him. It felt to me that he was, he was into it and he felt like he was prepared and he was, I don't know that he knew it was going to go that hard. Well, I saw him before my wife and I saw him before, uh, as he was walking around underneath the forum.
And, uh, I, you know, I've been fortunate enough to be around this guy on game days and things like that. I've never seen him looking like this. He was 1 million percent deep down wondering what have I done? What am I about to do? He's just like, I don't know how this is going to go.
Um, Kevin Hart's set and Jeff's set and then Bloodsow's set. And then I think you were right after Bloodsow or you after, okay, that, you know, that's where he was really in the soup. I think that one first hour, he's just wondering what have I done? And then he got through that. And then as he got closer to his own set, I think he kind of chilled out a little bit.
I mean, there's no question. And, and, and, you know, if he would have gone, if, if the timing of the show would have been what it should have been, which is a two hour show and it ran three hours, people don't have the stamina for three hours. So the fact that he got the response, he got and killed as hard as he did at the end at a three hour show where it's just nonstop laughs.
People get tired. If he would have gone at two hours, we would have be having a difference. He would have had like the set of the night.
Like it's like, it's depends on where you go in the lineup, but I thought he killed it. And I really think I just, the whole time I was writing these jokes and preparing, I was just thinking, thank God for this guy taking this chance. Maybe it's foolish of him. Maybe he's going to regret it, but it is extremely brave. He doesn't need to do this.
He's on top of the world. Like it, I thought it was really cool that he, he, whether or not he is stepping away from it, disappointed that he did it, I think he should really be praised for putting himself in the line of fire like that, because that is, people can make fun of him all day. And most people would never do that. You talk to people and you go, would you do Russ? They go, no, no. Like there are people that were booked on the roast and then got scared and dropped out.
Like I was writing jokes for people, a lot of people that like, I had to just dump my jokes cause they got too scared last minute and pulled out. Is that right? Yeah. Oh yeah. For this very roast?
Tyson, I think was supposed to be there. He's done a roast before. And there were some other comedians that I thought, oh, this guy knows how to handle, like, it's not about doing the jokes. It was about taking the jokes. And I think a lot of comedians and celebrities are too precious about themselves to, to do that. And it does hurt a lot.
So I think that people are too scared to do it. That's why I thought it was great that Belichick stayed on the, on the dais. So cool of him because the other guys left right, Ben Affleck left right away. She and Peyton Manning turned around and left true. They got out of it.
Because they're not, they, you can't make jokes about them really, if they're not there, they're not going to land the same way. And they knew that. And the fact that Belichick stayed out and had his whistle, like, I mean, there were random things happening that were not planned for.
Gronk throwing, smashing, doing a Gronk smash. Yeah, because we would have all had protective eyewear. So lucky. So dangerous.
So dangerous. Insane. I think he was like, I think these guys were drinking a little bit too much to ease their nerves. And then that, and then he had finished it.
Right. And it went well. And you just want to celebrate, you know, like, it's just, I saw where it came from, but I was like, oh, he's so lucky that didn't go in someone's eye. That could have been really bad, but the most dangerous Gallagher of all time, you had a paper pack, you know, an advisor, honestly, SWAT gear shot glass. Holy cow.
Like imprint on the floor. Yeah. And he even screamed something about like, yeah, sue me Netflix. I don't think it got on the tape, but I remember being like, they, they might do that was really irresponsible, but that he was just caught up in the moment. I think that was what was so fun about it was that people, they just went so hard and then they got like adrenaline from going hard and I'm saying these things to my coach. Like that was a big moment for them.
I didn't realize that. I don't really, I mean, now I understand so much more that relationship that was going on, but hell yeah. That was, that was intense. Edelman at one point in the middle of delivering a joke to Belichick said, I've been waiting for years for years for this.
Literally said those words out loud. It's like Sigmund Freud. That's like the roast of Freud right here. I mean, holy crap. It really was. And Gronk being like, what are you going to make me go?
Should I go run a Hill? You know, like in that kind of thing. And then when Belichick blew the whistle and he goes, so you disagree with that one. Okay.
Well actually, I'm going to read it again. That was so funny. And Belichick was smiling and having fun with it. Like I just thought it was the tone was perfect and it was, but there were things happening that really were because it was a live thing.
And because tensions were high, like it was not, this was not something that just went by the book, by the script. Like it was a live TV event. That's awesome. It was cool.
Mickey Glaser here on the Rich Eisen Show. So I am, I am mandated to ask you what is the moment like with your boyfriend when you see him after you mentioned you would shoot him in the face for getting a lottery ticket to a lottery ticket to Tom Brady. That's correct. Yeah. Just to the chance.
We don't even know what kind of lottery this is. How many people are just that joke to me was so funny. He was actually there. My boyfriend, we were at this brunch in at Ted Sarandos, his house of Netflix, the president of Netflix. We were at his house the day before the roast and all these comedians are hundreds of comedians. And Jimmy Carr is there who is one of the best joke writers going. He's just, he's done roast before.
He's written for people on roasts. Didn't you say a joke at the Rob Lowe roast about what Jimmy A. Carr is? Well, what's his, Ralph Macchio was on the dais as well. And I said, Jimmy A. Carr is what Ralph Macchio is going to have to do tonight to find a place to sleep.
That was one of my favorite jokes I've ever written, but Jimmy is one of the best. And I went up to him and I had sent him my set to be like, hey, will you give this a once over and any punch up you have or any suggestions? Cause he just is devastated. He doesn't pull any punches. And he told me, he's told me some other things to say that I said, I will never say that. Like, he really was like, you got to do the, like, I can't even say what it was. It was so horrible what he told me to say.
But this, but this one, I had a bunch of jokes about wanting to bang Tom Brady and kind of throwing myself at him. And he goes, what if he was, you know, had a moment where you almost seem like you're going to propose to your boyfriend, like a really sincere moment. And then you say, I would shoot you in the face, you know, he presented it first and I was like, oh, that's a nice idea, but like, oh, that's, that's like the, that's exactly what I would want to do, but I can't do that. And my boyfriend's sitting there and I go, I can't. And he goes, you should do it. And I go, really?
Like my boyfriend was like, I know you wouldn't care. And I was like, really? And he was like, no, it's a joke. And I go, yeah, it's a joke. This is all fantasy joke.
Yeah. And he was so encouraging and giving, getting his permission. Cause he's, he's, he's awesome in that way that he lets me talk about him and our relationship and anything. He says, as long as it's funny, you can say whatever you want. Now I get into some rough territory if I talk about him and it's not funny. And it's just like a story where I'm complaining and stuff, but if I make it funny, I can say whatever I want. So as long as the comedy is good, you're green lit? Yeah.
He really cares about my career and like, and having me be successful and being myself. And he's just like, as long as it's, because if there, the thing is, if there is a, if it's for comedy, you could always have plausible deniability. Yes. Cause I think a lot of people would shoot him in the face to get a lottery ticket with you.
Yes. Is he aware of that? He knows what he has. He's really, and that's why he, that's why he's so cool. I think he's like, not a lot of guys would be that cool. And that's one part of him that I'm like, I really, I, I, I got lucky finding a guy who's that secure to handle all that.
I mean, I've talked about everything about him. Cause that line, that line crushed and that was the big finish. So fun. It was so fun to deliver. It was so scary to deliver because I just, you know, Jimmy and I had just written it the day before. So me kind of working it out that night and you know, Tom isn't there when I'm running it at the comedy store in the belly room. And so when I'm doing the joke about, I would shoot you, my boyfriend's not even there in the face to even a lottery ticket to this, this, and then I'm pointing at nothing like it works, but it's like, if it doesn't work, I'm like, I should still do it because it will work if he's there, but you don't know. It's like, it's nothing in my comedy career has ever been this like level of difficulty of like the unknowns. I'm very someone who like, I like to know what I'm getting into. And this is, that's why not many people do it.
I'm very lucky that I'm, I'm, I'm someone who's not scared to do it because it's a great spot to be in. And of course, no, Tom Brady is not in the belly of what you said in the belly club or something like that. I was like, where's Tom working this out?
But he was on his jet. Like I talked to his manager. He's like, Tom has been practicing so much.
I mean, he, Tom Brady did, he, he didn't mess around. And Jeff was telling me that I have to be able to, I gotta, I'd see Jeff at the comedy store. I gotta be up at 6 AM cause I got to meet up with Tom. Like that's how, that's when he starts, man. This is a different thing. So he would get to, he'd get Jeff up at six in the morning. That's a wake and bake for him. By the way, this is where Tom is now.
I'll put it up on the screen. There he is. Right.
Look at, look at Tom and Venice. Yeah. Um, good for him. He needs to get away. Get, they, they have, they haven't watched it yet.
Right over in Venice. So yeah, like that whole story of Giselle being disappointed and him having to apologize to her. Like, I just, I just, I wonder what he knew or how, what he thought we wouldn't, would and wouldn't say, because there was not a mandate of not to say something. But, and I've said it before, we all kind of agreed, let's not go after the kid thing, that the kissing thing or whatever, you know, let's not make jokes about that, which was a such a bummer. Cause I wrote so many jokes about it. It was such a bummer, but I understood it because I, I, the kids are not a part of it. Even the Giselle thing. I was like, she's not there.
And even saying her name, I tried to say ex-wife as much as possible, not to put her name with things, but you can't say it for every joke. And so, uh, you know, I, I, when I read like Giselle is disappointed, I go, yeah, fair. I'm sorry. You're right.
I'll, I'll, I'll eat that one. I am sorry. Well, you know, again, he, it was a, it was a great night. I mean, when you hugged it out with him and said, what do you say to you? He said, great job, really great job. And then I ran into him. It was kind of blacked out at that point, but I remember getting a feeling that he wasn't like, there was no undertone of I'm mad, like upset or anything. He was really like, great job.
Thank you. And then, because he did, I heard, I mean, maybe I was lied to, but he picked me. Like I remember when I found out about the Tom Brady roast, it was announced before I got booked on it. And I was kind of done with roast because it had been five years since I've done it. It was pre COVID. I was younger.
If you called me old, it wouldn't hurt my feelings. It just like, I just feel like I'm too sensitive now for it. And so I was like, ah, if another one comes up, I probably won't do it, but then it's Tom Brady. And I was like, no, that's too big. I got to do it.
Yeah. Well, I'm glad you did because it's, it's, it's one of the biggest pop it's, it's iconic. It's, it's, it's now it's part of the iconography of, of pop culture. It truly is in terms of roasts, in terms of everything, there's the Hugh Hefner roast from back in the early aughts when it was really important at the time for our country to start laughing again. And I kind of feel like in the same way, obviously it's totally different circumstances that we do need a certain laugh and a certain, like being able to poke fun of one another and as much of a safe space as you possibly can. And somebody like Tom Brady saying, all right, I'll, I'll make myself the butt of jokes on live Netflix for three hours.
It really was something that I couldn't believe I was personally witnessing and the building, the place was just electric and you were awesome. And now you're finding out like Todd Bowles, the head coach of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, a fan of yours. And I'm sure people have even seen the Rose yet. He was just like, I'm a fan, Nikki Glaser. I'm excited to watch her clip. And I'm like, wait, you didn't even see it. How are you a fan of mine?
It was so nice. We saw your, your mind blown emoji right there. I really, and he's not known for, you know, having an edge. No, you know, I ask all my male friends that obviously know of him. I'm like, what's his vibe?
And they're like, this is not his vibe. Being a Nikki Glaser fan is not something we ever thought of Todd Bowles would be, but I'm so flattered and I want to go to a game. Like I'm, it's really nice to be in this new world. This sports world that I've always felt like intimidated by and that I didn't understand. And now in doing the research for the Rose and also honestly becoming, being a Swiftie and her dating Travis, I have to care about football and, uh, and started paying attention and learning to like, love it in this way that I never have.
So it's, um, it's so cool to, to have this moment. Have you met Taylor Swift? I met her before I was a huge fan and, uh, there, I I'm staying away though.
I just, I want her to want to meet me. I'm just going to keep my distance. Yeah. I know you've met a trailer Swift. I know that. Yeah. I called Jule at one of the rows trailer Swift trailer Swift.
Yeah. Oh my God. Uh, your new comedy special Nikki Glaser someday you'll die. Everybody check it out on HBO and max tomorrow night at 10 Eastern time. And tomorrow night when that debuts, you'll be on the, on the stage of the Hollywood Palladium. Part of this outstanding Netflix as a joke festival, uh, Nikki Glaser.com for tickets, uh, to your upcoming events.
The Venetian next weekend in Las Vegas, Lake Tahoe, the weekend after that, Salt Lake City in June. And of course there's the Nikki Glaser podcast where all podcasts can be listened to and acquired. You're awesome. Thank you so much for having me anytime. I know you're not out here. You don't live out here, but when anytime you're in town, I'll be back. This was awesome.
Let's do it. Cause right back at you. That's Nikki Glaser.
Everybody follow her on Twitter and Instagram at that, uh, at that title as well, right here on the rich Eisen show. Don't go anywhere. Back with more in a sec. We have a game that we play here called start bench cut. Okay.
Sort of like the, you know what? Mary kill game. Okay.
Where you, we give you clean. We try. Yeah. Well start bench.
Well we make the, of the, of that, you know, the Mary part is the bench park. Okay. So we give you three. Here we go.
Sit down and be quiet or cut. All right. Start bench cut here with Kevin Hart. Here are your three choices to play basketball.
It happens to teammate. Okay. The rock cube or Will Ferrell. You have to start one of them. All right. Well, I'm a bench one or if you've been in movies with all of these guys.
Yeah, I have. I'm a start Will Ferrell. You start, Jackie moon gets to start. Jackie moon gets to start, uh, just because I know that he's got the passion behind the game.
His spirit is always high. Uh, I'm a cut the rock. I'm gonna cut him out.
Wow. Why is that too? Is that too?
I don't like that too. And you're going to bench cube. You're going to bring cube off the bench. I'm gonna bring cube off the bench. I'm bringing cube off the bench because cube cube is too cool to play the whole game. So there's going to be moments with cube. Look at his sneaks and be like, I just realized I'm messing these up.
I'm like, you write cute. You sit down for a second and get your new pair of sneaks. You got to keep him. You got to keep him calm.
You know, you don't want him giving you. Yeah. Yeah.
You like just getting upset. I want to make sure that tomorrow's going to be sunglasses on. It's too dark. Plus it's a smart move here with Will's the tallest of them all. Mike's inside out game with you. Yeah. Me and Will are going to dominate.
I got to start Will, but the rock's out of here. Fantastic. All of it on our YouTube page, youtube.com slash rich eyes and show on all that good stuff.
8 4 4 2 0 4. Rich is the number to dial right here on the program. Back on the rich eyes and show radio network, sitting at the rich eyes and show desk furnished by Granger with supplies and solutions for every industry.
Granger has the right product for you call click ranger.com or just stop by. That was just absolutely delightful. Yeah, that was great. So the Pacers and the Knicks are just the, I guess, follow up act to last night's Caitlin Clark home debut.
I want to talk about making an impact WNBA preseason games, right guys? Yeah. Right.
Have we ever seen national television talk about this across the board or anybody, any kind of attention to it whatsoever. 12 points in her home debut. Yeah. In Indianapolis sold out for the Indiana fever.
All right. And starts in a week, right? Next weekend, next week. I believe she opens up in the state of Connecticut, right? First game is on the road for her May 14th. Again, I don't recall ever knowing off the top of my head, like that when the WNBA seasons are also, and this is the truth. And this is, I think it's also, you could put it on the board of all of women's college basketball being on a radar screen. And obviously Caitlin Clark is the most well-known name nationally, but the South Carolina program, the LSU program, the UConn program, just to name three others and the players on all of those teams and, you know, LSU and South Carolina basically throwing down in a way that we don't see the men's game throwing down. And they are, they it's, it gets nasty in these games and it makes it more interesting to watch. And the basketball is excellent too.
Fundamentally sound. But within days of Caitlin Clark being drafted into the WNBA, Toronto gets, they're expanding, Toronto gets a franchise. And for the first time, chartered flights, 25 million a year, it's going to cost the WNBA for chartered flights for all the teams. I think once that video, I mean, Brittany Greiner had some travel issues last year. That's one way to put it, but not for the WNBA. No, when she came back, she was getting heckled and harassed at the airport. But I think it took that video of Caitlin walking through the airport with security to finally snap the WNBA into action. I think it kind of, I don't know if it embarrassed her, but it did.
It kind of, I don't know if it embarrassed them or whatever, whatever it was, it worked. Cause now they're getting the charters and Houston, who was a four time WNBA women's champion, their team went away and now their owners looking to bring another team back there. So, you know, expansion is coming along with Toronto. It's nice to see.
It is. So, you know, we'll be about it. We're going to pay attention to it. We'll talk about it more and we'll do our part. Cause it is a part.
It is a part. Also the WNBA league pass is insanely affordable. It's $25 for the whole season.
And you get to watch every single game. We're getting it again. My 10 year old Hooper in the house, a million percent we're doing that. Now, are you jumping on the sparks or are you hopping on the fever bandwagon?
Have you decided yet in your house? The funny thing is about the sparks. I was talking to my goddaughter the other day and she's like talking to me about Cam Brink. Like she knows Cameron Brink plays for the Sparks. Is that because she heard from the godfather constantly pounding the table about? No. Is she aware of how interested the godfather wants to, you know, make an offer someone can't refuse? I had nothing to do with that. She struck up a conversation with me about it.
I told you, I'm not really into like, that's not, you know, that's not really honestly, I mean, we're talking about a difference maker. How many times has TJ Jefferson come in and said, well, I saw Caitlin Clark on McAfee show. How about getting Cam Brink in here immediately from the next day? I'm just saying we got to like, man, there's a race going on guys. We got to keep up. Oh, you're talking about broad. We don't, we're not in any race with Pat.
Not just Pat, every show. We just stay up on top. But no, I had nothing to do with it. She started this conversation. So I'm just saying, how did she, how did she hear about this particular player? Told her. Okay. Yeah. Her mom somehow knows, met her.
And then. Who's her mom? Her mom is her mom. Do we know her mom is her mom?
That's true. Do we know her mom? By the way, happy Mother's Day and all the moms out there, including me with Kunis. Is that who that is? So wait a second, we're talking about Ashton's kid?
Yes, that is my daughter. Why won't you say the names? Because it doesn't matter. It could be anyone in this particular point. I'm just telling you.
Only one person had met Cameron. Yeah, but this makes it a little more relatable to the fan. That makes it unrelatable because the point is nine year old girls who never paid attention to basketball. Yes, that was the point.
Thank you. Which is our original point. Now we found the point. Hey, do you know this person? Yes.
And she played for them. There you go. That's what I'm saying.
That's right. Come on. And I would like to, you know, he's got the sparks.
See, that's why I'm not going to share the rest of the story with you. I guess we're adding, are we adding the sparks pennant to TJ's graphic? I think so. I don't know.
You know what I mean? I like players. I still might roll with the aces because they'd be winning back to back.
Josh Charles is about to join us in studio. I need championship teams on my roster. As you know, we're desperate. All you got is the penguin.
That's all I got. You know, it's how many Rangers haven't lost a playoff game yet? Seven and oh, again, an overtime to start their playoffs.
Let's do that. My hockey team don't make the playoffs to basketball teams can get to the second round. I just need some championships on that. Rangers are Rangers are Rangers are overtime Kings. Unfortunately for the Carolina hurricanes, the look at the game winning goal.
Such a nice Panarin is just an outstanding hockey player. And look at him going that go in. Well, I mean, he went between his legs.
No, I know. I'm just saying, well, someone else shot it. He redirected. Yeah, he redirected.
Well, that's a redirect, sir. You know why the Rangers are up three? Oh, right.
Well, it's cool. Didn't take a picture with the cup. Has he done that would have been a whole different story, but it's absurd. It had nothing to do with it. 0.0. Well done.
Well done. So stupid. So dumb. The whole thing's stupid. Whole thing's stupid. Zero point.
Correct. The hockey gods have no idea what Monica is up to. None. Do you know the hockey gods? I do. I don't personally, I know the hockey gods and I'm happy to talk about who I know. Unlike other people. That's I know two people. I tell a story.
It's one of the two. I am the Godson of the hockey gods. Rangers are now the favorites. They should be.
They should have been to begin with. John brings his skewed sense of humor. Jeff brings tips to cut strokes off your next round together. It's those weekend golf guys.
They'll pay a lot of money to PXG and Tylus and Callaway and on and on and on. How many yards do you think you're going to pick up with that extra driver? I think I can get an extra five to 10. What if I give you a 15 to 20?
Can you pay me more? Jeff Smith teaches on a sliding scale. Those weekend golf guys, the podcast part of the belief network. Just search BLEAV on YouTube or wherever you listen.