Never Meant To Be Alone

This is the Truth Network. Welcome to Man Talk brought to you by TAWCMN, talking and walking Christian men's ministry, where they're devoted to breaking down the walls of race and denomination and challenging men to take their God-assigned role. Here's our hosts, Will Hardy and Roy Jones Jr., a black guy and a white guy.

Good afternoon. Welcome back to Man Talk Radio. I'm Roy Jones, and I'm going to mess you up with, I'm the black guy today.

Oh my goodness. Well, I can't be the white guy. So we figured we'd just shake you up a little bit, folks. All kidding aside, I'm Roy Jones, the white guy.

And I'm Will Hardy, the black guy. And Roy, you know, we were talking earlier that people are, you know, stuck at home. They have cabin fever. They're isolated, you know, from everybody, from people in nursing homes, hospitals, and things like that. So we have a topic today that all of you who are listening today need to hear.

Yeah. It's about isolation, right? We were never meant to be alone. And we've got Pastor Ken Kline from Greensboro, North Carolina, from Christ Western Church in Greensboro, who's joined us before, and who's a big part of talking ministry, who sits on the board with us, and loves men, and about getting men off the sidelines, which is what our whole mission's about. So welcome, Ken. It's good to have you with us.

Hey, guys. Good to be with you. So, Ken, you're off in the country like me.

You've got a little bit of land to stretch out. So, you know, it's not like we're totally going bonkers, but for me and Will, we're working 730 to 5 or 8 to 530 every day at the dining room table or the home office or whatever it is. So we do get a little bit close to getting the cabin fever, but thank you so much for joining us, Ken.

I know you just recently did a Bible study, a devotion on this. So why don't you just open up a little bit and give us a little bit of a recap on what you covered with your team, and we'll ask some questions along the way, and offer some commentary, if that's okay. Yeah, absolutely.

Absolutely. Yeah, it's been a lot of Zoom conferencing nowadays. That's kind of new to a lot of our folks, but that seems to be the name of the game right now. I've been meeting with fast at the church. I've been meeting with several leadership teams, different associations I'm with, different pastor groups, and one of our topics has just been, what do we need to do? How do we connect to those around us when we're not really supposed to be out and about connecting in restaurants and meetings and big gatherings and church gatherings?

And a lot of them are working on technology, and that's great. I'm all for the Zoom and these different ways, trying to figure out how to use Facebook Live for Sunday messages and things like that. But the thing that keeps coming back and has been coming back is we need to communicate even by phone on a regular basis. So with my staff, with my church staff, our goal is to contact at least five people by day with our church by phone, and then at least another five or six random church family members by text. And what's driving that is, especially with the number of seniors that we have in the church, it's easy to start feeling after a week or two it's not bad. After six or seven weeks, you begin to feel isolated. And that can be, for some people, have depression issues and anxiety issues.

It's something that can be very serious. And so we're really making an effort to try to have multiple calls each week. So in addition to daily e-news, I always, for a lot of the people that don't do Facebook, a lot of our seniors said, you know, I'm not into the whole Facebook thing, but I miss my church. I miss knowing what's going on. So I've had to make an effort, literally, to do the daily e-news, which is updates on what's going on, who needs prayer, what's going on with the world here within our church family. I usually give a devotion in there.

I give a picture of the day, kind of a thought of the day. It's just those kind of things are trying to help make them feel less isolated. You know, that's the short of what we're trying to do right now.

Right. And you know, Ken, when you were talking there, I'm reminded in Ephesians chapter 4, I was reading this about a week ago, Ephesians 4, 1 through 3, I, therefore, prisoner of the Lord, beseech you to walk worthy of the calling were which you will call with all lowliness, gentleness, long suffering. There's, there's the word, long suffering, bearing one another in love, endeavoring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. And see what you just talked about is in that connectivity, that's keeping that unity of the Spirit together. Even though we're not face to face, we still have to utilize the ways and means in which the Lord have blessed us through this virtual world that we're living in now. And I dare to say, Roy, and Ken, that I don't think that this world of virtuality is going to go away anytime soon.

Yeah, yeah. No, I think you're right, Will. It's based on this transition plan that we're hearing more about for each of the states and even here within our state in North Carolina. It's been backed up another week before the shelter in place directive is going to have some relaxation to it. And I think it's like May 8th now.

So it was the 30th of the end of the month. So it's not going to go away. And even, even when we get back to some level of normalcy, it's going to be different because people are going to be hyper cautious just by the nature of what we've gone through. Airlines are going to be different.

You know, they can't have people stacked on top of each other anymore like they've done in the past, which means there's probably going to have to be some infrastructure changes to jets. Supermarkets are going to be different. Your interaction with your folks at church is going to be different because the next time you get ready to shake somebody's hand, you're going to think twice about it.

You get ready to give somebody a hug, you're going to think twice about it. And it is going to be quite different, quite different. So in, when we were talking about loneliness, Pastor Ken, what were some of the other elements of loneliness that, you know, you wanted to bring out today?

Well, one of the things I said in my e-news for today, I've been getting a few folks, whether I see them online, through Facebook, or I do still work up at the church, pretty much by myself, but people do stop by to drop off a project, whatever. But I'm starting to hear some of the complaining and the grumbling. I'm tired of this nonsense. This is ridiculous. This governor needs to do something.

The president needs to, we got to get back to it. And what was kind of sad is that the reality, when we talk about isolation, is the number of people I thought of today, tens of thousands, literally tens of thousands of people that are in isolation units in hospitals that don't have any family with them. And then the nursing homes and the senior care facilities, you're talking millions of people in our country who aren't allowed to see family. There again, there's an isolation factor. And it is quite depressing. And so what I was trying to do to encourage, maybe get the focus off your, because you haven't been at your favorite restaurant in a while to sit down, why don't you just take an hour or two to sit down and pray for the millions of people that are feeling very isolated.

It just breaks my heart when we talk about the people that die daily that died in an isolation room with no family members there, what that must be like. And so, yeah, another scripture that that came out, Will, you're my scripture guy, so you can probably put a verse to this. But I just where it says, well, one strand can easily be broken.

And, and two is stronger, but three can't be broken that are bound together. And so there is a great benefit. And, and we talk about is iron sharpens iron when men help build each other up and lift each other up. We have we were just we were created to be that way. We literally were knitted together by Father God, with with the need to be in fellowship in relationship with other people.

There's no, there's no argument against that people that are isolationists. There's, there's got to be something seriously wrong there, because we're created to be with one another. And even God saw that in Adam, when he was working in the garden. And he said he needs a soulmate, he needs a helper. And in Genesis 218, he said, it's not good for man to be alone. And so he created a companion to walk with him and work with him and enjoy life with him. And that still exists today. We still have that need to be an interaction with one another.

Yeah, you know, Pastor Ken, that that's, that's wonderful. And it's beautiful, because, you know, what we should be concentrating on, I think, as we're in this time of isolation, is to think about think about not not what is happening around us. But after we come through this, what will we do as a body to advance the gospel and promote the name of Jesus Christ? Because we got time.

You got God has given us time, there is no more excuses, I gotta go play golf on Sunday, or I got to take the kids to soccer practice. God, you know, we talked about this on some shows prior that he shut all that down. So yeah, so now they we are without excuse. You know, we we now have this time to say, we are a body that is, you know, strengthened as a result of this talking about that three fold cord is not easily broken. And and it's and it's not when you are knitted and woven together. You know, God is just like, in chemistry, we talk about the double bond and the triple bond. And being a major in chemistry, when you have that triple bond, it's difficult to break it.

I mean, chemically. So when we when we take that analogy, and we look at it as the Church of Jesus Christ, and we say, through this, let's be knitted together, even the more so even though we're not face to face physically, right, that we're using these ways and means that God has for his glory, to bring about change. Let's talk about when we come out of this, what are we going to do? How are we going to bring the gospel forward? How are we going to push this thing forward? Yeah, what's going to look different than it does today?

Exactly. And I think when we come back up to break here in just a couple of seconds, I want to talk back about what Ken was talking about, about the people in the nursing homes and in the nursing units at the hospitals and so forth. So we'll be right back here in just a couple of moments. We want to thank you again for joining us on ManTalk Radio, and we'll be here in just a couple seconds. Dr. Jeff Fricke has been caring for patients in High Point for 34 years. Physical therapy, such as ultrasound and spinal decompression for disc conditions, such as herniation, comprehensive care for auto accident injury patients with no out-of-pocket expense. Remember, affordable chiropractic on West Lexington Avenue in High Point.

Call 336-885-1987. Welcome back to ManTalk Radio. I'm Roy Jones.

And I'm Will Hardy. And, Ken, we were right before break, you had made the point about the loneliness and how it broke your heart and many people's hearts when they see there's the loved ones, friends, and even unknowns that are dying without family or friends around them. But as you were saying that and about the nursing homes, God just put on my heart to raise this for us as a team and those that are listening out there.

If you go back before this all happened, and we'll say now post COVID-19, what's it going to look like, like we were talking about right before the break is, you know, the nursing homes is probably the probably has the most residents that have probably the least amount of visitors across any any scope of institution that we know of. And, you know, it's really sad. And my wife, her mother died last year. And but as a result of that, she got a chance to interact with ladies in this home where her mother would stay, it was a retirement center, but she would see these ladies with nobody ever coming to see them. And, folks, these aren't people that always do not have children.

These are oftentimes people who have children who don't take the time out of their schedules to go visit their aging parents. So when Ken was sharing that, it just came on my heart that we need to say, challenge our listeners and ourselves to say, hey, we need to start building into other people. When this is over, we do need to be building into others. And God has put us on pause to start looking inside, like we talked about with Dr. Kunkel the other day, to be reflecting, looking inside, what can we do differently?

What should we be doing differently? But, and equally as more important is it's a time of revival so that the non-followers will get back in line and start following Christ. And those that have been on the fence or have gotten lukewarm will get back into the full relationship with Christ. And, you know, we at True Worship Community Church, Roy, we have a ministry on the fourth Sunday at three o'clock. We go to a nursing home, and it's basically, when you walk in the door, it simply breaks your heart to see residents of this home just sitting in the hallway unattended. And some of them might be calling out for something.

Some can't speak very well, but they motion with their hands and how some of the orderlies or the people who supposed to be taking care of them simply just walk on by or they simply say, you don't need anything right now. You know, we've seen things like this and brought it to the administrator's attention, but then next month when we come back and do the same picture. So, and I was wondering, Ken.

Yeah, go ahead, sir. I was going to mention to you guys that, you know, prior to all this happening, let's say we could rewind the clock maybe three months. We had no discussion about social distancing and actually it wasn't even a term really used for anything. But now social distancing is a big thing. We all understand what it means.

It's been talked about, it's been talked about, it's been talked about. But what's interesting to me is the church has been practicing social distancing for many, many years in America. I know where this is going. Yep.

Yeah. We are guilty of distancing ourselves from people that aren't like us a lot of times. And we like to claim all of our cool outreach stuff, but the truth is a lot of the churches have been focused on what do we got to do to perform better, look better, be cooler, stay current, and all those things.

And the widows and the orphans, you know, are still forgotten. And the racial differences and stuff within the churches, we've social distanced ourselves from other denominations. We've social distanced ourselves from not only denominations, but other churches of a different color. And I know I'm pretty rare to be fortunate to be called to be a pastor of a multi-ethnic church, but also multicultural church, multi-denominational church, multi-generational church, multi-gender church. And I feel blessed that I'm actually seeing something that's pretty rare nowadays. And what I'm hoping is when we come out of this, everybody's saying, I wonder what God's up to.

I wonder what God's doing. Maybe part of it, maybe part of the equation is he wants us to be more aware of social distancing and what it causes. I'm hearing, I heard on the radio the other day, a girl gave a testimony, I think it was on one of the stations, and she said, one of the things I realize I've taken for granted is my church.

It's gotten easy to not go as often and be absent. And she said, I realize how much I need those people. And she said, the isolationist just kind of woke me up to, I have a body that I'm part of, I need to get closer to them again. She was, an average American now only worships 27 weeks a year.

That's an average Christian American. And so I hope part of it will be, hey, I'm part of a body and I want to be part of that body again, but I want that body to go outside these walls and embrace the human race again. When you look at that, when you were talking about it, it reminded me of just our human body.

Our human body, we are made and were created to be social creatures to interact. And when you look at our body, we have hinge joints and we have ball and socket joints. And so these joints in the human body are made for motion.

I mean, when you walk, your arms automatically swing. So these things are tantamount, if you will, to the human body. So as the church, when this is over, if we have been sitting down, we need to say, now, let's get out and let the Holy Spirit work in and through us to do something that is meaningful and beneficial. And I'm not talking about the rah rah sis boom bah, because a lot of what we're seeing, like on the TV commercials, every TV commercial I watch now is talking about thank you nurses and thank you doctors. And this is good.

I'm not talking down to this because these workers work hard. But my concern is, is when the rah rah sis boom bah is over, what will you be doing? And where will you be standing?

Well, that's a great question, Will. And I think we go back not too many years ago to 9-11. It's 19 years, I guess, or 20 years now, I guess, going close to 2001, 9-11, 2001. And when it happened, everybody was on board with being patriotic about turning to God in churches. I mean, people ran to the churches for weeks after this happened. But then, you know, we talked about this before, two years later, you hardly see American flag, three years later, attendance has dropped off in church. And here we are, you know, 19 years later, and look at what the church attendance looks like today. And Ken, I've had this conversation over recent months, you know, what is the typical church going to look like in the next 10 years? And Ken, I don't know what your heart says now, but after what we're going through now, I'm hopeful that there's going to be a total revival and what the church looks like. It's no longer going to be people sitting at home in small groups. And that needs to be the support mechanism of the larger church and larger body. What are your thoughts, Ken? Yeah, I agree. I don't want the church to be the same. And I've been real bold and clear about that.

I hope it's never what it was before all this. Acts 2, 42 through 47 talks about the early church, and there were thousands of thousands upon thousands that had, you know, come to believe in Christ. And what's interesting, it says they continue to devote themselves to the apostles teaching. They met daily together, some in the temple, but many in their homes, breaking of bread, the fellowship, spending time with each other, learning from each other, growing from each other. They talk in those early days of the church, the people were without need, which just absolutely amazes me because of true love, passion, concern, compassion for each other.

They were making sure that needs were being met. And that's a picture of the early church, but we have gotten really far from the early church, and having a home Bible study group school, but I'm really hoping it goes way beyond that, that people actually start inviting people into their homes, again, to eat with them, to break bread with them, and to commune with them, and hang out with them. And it's been really easy, especially our – I don't mean to pick on our millennial group, but a lot of them hide behind the screen. It's just easy to communicate. And I've got younger people in my church, they do great encouraging behind a screen, but face to face, they are a different person.

And I'm hoping that we can kind of break – I'm all about technology, I think it's wonderful, but we've got to get back to embracing one another in the human way we were meant to be. Darrell Bock Yeah, I agree, Ken. Well, you know, that falls on us, right? Or at least maybe it's our kids it falls on, but it falls on us, the way this has developed, because we've talked about this before, the men didn't lead – haven't been leading properly over the last X number of years, 40 or 50 years, whatever it is, compared to when our father's fathers were working hard and doing things differently.

And I think it even started back in the early as the 50s, you know, you were looking at the pictures of families that showed the wife reading the Bible to the children, you know, instead of the husband sitting there reading the Bible to the family and leading the family. So I think we've got to start coaching, Ken, and we've got to – now's the time, because people's hearts are going to be much more open to change than they ever have been in our lifetime. Darrell Bock And if you think about this, you know, when you're talking about the millennials, and all of a sudden this just popped in my head, can you see a millennial going out chopping wood for a fireplace? Can you see a millennial drawing water from a well?

I mean, this is what had to be done back then. So, you know, that just popped in my head, and I just had to go ahead and get it. Darrell Bock Hey, and that's – Ken, we'll leave it to you to close us out here in the last 30 seconds. What you got to offer us up, brother? Ken Jones Hey, love people.

You've got a telephone that has a smartphone check. Get on there. Love some people. Listen to God's nudges and go and hurt a couple people tonight, tomorrow, today. So just do your thing. That's what we're supposed to do. That's what we're created to do. Darrell Bock Amen, Ken.

Thank you so much. And brother, it's always good to have you on with us. We'll have you back soon. Ken Jones Yes, sir. Darrell Bock And folks, again, don't be by yourself. And when this breaks loose and you have a chance to get out, get in the body of fellowship, do things differently. Don't be the same person coming out of this that you were going into it.

Ken Jones That's right. Change, change, change, change. It is a necessity. So be there for your wife and your children. God bless you. Darrell Bock As we wrap up today's show, be assured that TAWCMM, Talking and Walking Christian Men's Ministry, is building a community of men that are Christ followers with the desire to be servant leaders in their homes, communities, churches, and work environments. Check out our website for upcoming events and regularly scheduled meetings. Drop us a note for topics that you would like to have us visit in the future. Thank you for joining us on Man Talk today. Visit us at www.tawcmm.com. Men walking the talk.