The U.S. Surgeon General recently reported that loneliness is at an epidemic level. It thrives in secrecy. It cuts across all age groups.
It remains often undetected and causes shame and embarrassment. So what is God's solution to this serious problem? Stay with me as we look at Jesus' antidote to those painful feelings of isolation and loneliness. Welcome to this Edition of Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. We are a discipleship-driven ministry on a mission to encourage Christians everywhere to live like Christians. And I can't think of a more appropriate topic for our world than what Chip's diving into today. We're in the middle of our newest series, Bio, three essential practices to becoming more like Jesus. And so far we've learned that spending time with God daily is the foundation for an authentic faith. But today Chip builds on that idea by studying the second vital habit Jesus practiced during his earthly ministry.
So if you're ready, here's Chip with his talk. Each one of us has a cry in our heart, and that cry in our heart is, will someone love me and accept me just for me? Not for how I look, not for what I can do, not for what they can get from me, but would they just love me? You see, we're all asking that question every day in lots of different ways.
Where do I belong? Neil Postman in his classic, it's an older work, but it was a commentary as he saw things coming. He says, we're amusing ourselves to death. We swipe, we scroll, we binge, we slowly distract ourselves, and we all develop this public image that hides pain and hurt and isolation. The article goes on to talk about, we're so connected digitally, and we so have connections with many, many people, but we're more and more isolated relationally. And that's why this second practice of Jesus is so vital.
It's so important. And by the way, it may be the most attractive way to reach those people outside of Christ. Practice number one is coming before God daily. Practice number two is doing life in community. Let me tell you what I mean by that. It's the personal application first by developing a mindset of a servant, where you go through life, each moment of each day, and it will take practice, where you're looking for the needs of other people and asking, oh God, Holy Spirit living in me, which needs do you want me to meet?
It's a sensitivity that's very outwardly focused. Second is participating in vulnerable, in-depth relationships with fellow believers through mutual support and accountability that builds up the body of Christ. And then for those that are pastors and leaders, I would just remind you that our goal, our desire, is to create a church culture where people are serving in love, where they find themselves in authentic groups that not only are growing, but multiplying and inviting other people in so that people feel loved and connected.
A program doesn't do that. Sitting in a service with a few hundred people or a few thousand people, you can't experience authentic community apart from the container of some kind of a small group. Well, let's look at the core of authentic community theologically. Understanding the problem.
Are you ready for this? This goes all the way back to the garden. Humanity was made in the image of a relational God. Think of that. Let us make man in our image. The Trinity, one essence, three persons, by definition is relational. We're made in His image. We desperately need to be connected to other people as well as God.
Second, even in the best environment, in a perfect environment, it's not good to be alone. You know, Adam was in perfect relationship with God. There was no sin.
It was a perfect environment. And what did he say? It's not good for man to be alone. And so there was a corresponding partner, a connection, someone who was like him and for him, and the human mankind of male and female coming together in a connection with vulnerability and no shame. And third, sin broke our relationship with God and then with one another.
You know, once sin entered in, once disobedience came, once the rebellion started, it was very interesting. They're hiding from God, and then when God comes and asks a few questions, what does Adam do? This love of his life, it's not me. It's her.
And then he asks her, it's not me. It's, you know, who created this place and this servant? What I want you to understand is that sin breaks down community, and we all struggle with that.
But we're made for relationship. So let's talk about what do we mean by community? What is biblical community? Maybe in the most concise definition I could give you, biblical community is shared life with God and each other.
That key word is shared, koinonia. It's a Greek word that means sharing life together. In Acts 2, when they had all things in common and the believers were living out their faith together, they talked about this koinonia, this shared life, shared heart, shared resources. It's accomplished first and foremost by Christ.
We need to understand that this connection and this unity isn't just something we pull out of the air. The apostle Paul is teaching who we are in Christ in the book of Ephesians. He talks about where we were in chapter 2 and we were lost and alien and enemies of God. And then by verse 11 through the end of chapter 2, he talks about Christ has now divided or broken down the wall, and he's speaking to that group of the wall between Jew and Gentile. There was the court of the Gentiles, and the Gentiles couldn't come into this inner place to worship God.
And Jesus tore down that wall. And now in the body of Christ, the apostle Paul would go on to say there's not Jew or Gentile. There's not slave or free.
There's not male or female. There's humanity and there is this new supernatural community that's not based on nationalities or your race or your gender. There is this family of God, this community that God has opened the door and the day will come.
Every tribe, every nation, every tongue, people with all kind of backgrounds, all kind of cultures, all kind of languages, we're going to have connection from the heart. Jesus accomplished that for us, and then he enabled it. 1 Corinthians chapter 12 says that when you receive Jesus as your Savior, when I receive Christ as my Savior, the Holy Spirit took us not just out of the kingdom of darkness and into the kingdom of light, but he baptized us, he dipped us, he placed us in a new family, the body of Christ. And then we experience that with one another as we do life the way Jesus did life, with one another. The early church had all things in common. I love that classic passage where, you know, the Pentecost has come and the Spirit of God has come and all their sorrow and all their hurt and all their struggle and the spirits filled them and the new, the living Christ is inside of them and they gather each day together and they get instruction outdoors in the temple and thousands of people are coming to Christ.
And then they get in homes together and they have what they call the love feast and they would have a meal together and they would meet in all these different homes and these smaller groups and they would take the Lord's Supper together. And remember, this is what he did and this is who he is and what I want you to understand is that this koinonia, this sharing, this community, it's the most attractive thing in the world because your heart and my heart have this one cry. Who will accept me?
Who will love me just for me? And God longs for us to have that. But unfortunately, even as followers of Jesus, we can talk about community, we can believe in community, but we don't practice the very thing that Jesus practiced. Here's the implication of biblical community. Biblical community goes beyond social connection to, are you ready, a family commitment. See, what's happened in our world as we find ourselves going to a service, we started calling church a place that we go. Church is us, it's people. It's about us connected to God and us connected to one another. And pretty soon we get thinking that when you go to a service or you listen to someone talk or you sing a few songs that that's community.
No, no, no. That's a good time of instruction. That's a good time of worship. But when the Bible talks about and what Jesus modeled, it's beyond just a social connection. You're actually a member of the family. Listen to what Romans chapter 8, it says, we have been adopted by God whereby our spirit now cries Abba Father. We haven't received a spirit of slavery, but a spirit of adoption. It's just like adopting a child and now we're part of a brand new family. And we have family connection and family responsibility.
And this addresses two of our greatest needs. It addresses our fear of rejection. You belong somewhere. I don't know how many people I've talked to over the years and maybe they're at church or maybe they're in a coffee shop and, you know, you sit down and I find just asking people questions allows me to really connect. And you ask a couple of questions and pretty soon it doesn't take long to realize people aren't connected to other people.
People are really lonely. And one of the most amazing things about biblical community is there's a place that you really belong. And it doesn't matter whether you're male or female, doesn't matter whether you're rich or poor, black or white, Asian, doesn't matter. You see, we are now children of God because the Spirit of God dwells inside of us. It addresses our fear of rejection and it also addresses our insecurity.
You know, the hard part about relationships is that everybody seems like they fit except you. And what the scripture says is that just as our human bodies have many parts and all the parts don't have the same function, so we who are many individually belong to one another. That's Romans 12, 4 and 5.
And then he goes on to talk about God has given us different gifts, that as we exercise those gifts, we have inadequacies and struggles and insecurities and other people's gifts fit into ours. And so not only do we belong, but are you ready for this? If you're a follower of Jesus Christ, you are needed.
The body can't be without you. You bring a personality, a set of gifts, a family life background. You see, biblical community is like a supernatural family that we're committed to one another at a level even beyond blood relationship. Well, Jesus wanted the disciples to understand that if you're going to follow me, remember what he said? Follow me and I'll make you fishers of men. I want you to not only hear my teaching, I want you to not only be with me, but become like me.
I want you to do what I actually did. And so he's going to model for them, here's how you do life in community. First and foremost, Jesus invited people into his personal world.
If you read his life carefully, it seems like he's eating a meal with someone, he's going to eat a meal with someone, or he's coming back from eating a meal with someone. He just invited people into his life in the regular flow. People mattered. What they thought mattered.
Their life mattered. He was curious. He wanted to get to know them. He opened his life and he invited them into his. He considered others as more important than himself. In relationships, he had that servant mindset. The Son of Man didn't come to what? Be served, but to serve. And we often think of that as either like a waiter or, yes, he had this great theological calling.
But I think when Jesus sat down and had a meal with someone, the focus wasn't on him. The focus was on what's going on in your life. How are you doing? How's your marriage going?
You know, I notice you have a small child. Tell me a little bit about him. That's the kind of way that Jesus was. And he wanted to model for the disciples and for us. That's how community starts with the mindset of servanthood.
He chose 12 when he was going to get really serious. They wanted to be with him. And there were lots of disciples and everyone raising their hand. I want to be your disciple. You find someone who can raise people from the dead and feed 5,000.
Lots of people. Oh, Jesus, Jesus, I want to be on your team. And he prayed all night and he says that they might be, are you ready? It's the with him principle. What he knew is what's also true of us.
We become like the people we hang out with. You're listening to Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. We'll return you to Chip's message in just a minute. But first, let me tell you, God is doing incredible work through this ministry all around the world. And if you'd like to join us, consider partnering with us during our year-end match. Every gift we receive until midnight on December 31st will be matched dollar for dollar. Join us today by going to livingontheedge.org or by calling 888-333-6003. We appreciate your generosity.
Well, with that, here again is Chip. Solomon wrote it in Proverbs 1320. He who dwells with wise men will be wise, but the companion of a fool will suffer harm. He knew the only way for them to really catch his values, catch his heart, become servants, and have the kind of community. It couldn't just be when things were going well. Community happens when you're tired, when you're disappointed, when you're sad, when you're struggling, when you're angry.
That's when we need the kind of loving, genuine, authentic support that we both give and that we receive. And then Jesus did what we all long for. He loved, he forgave, he inspired, he affirmed. He prayed with them, and he prayed for them, and he rebuked them.
Peter, get behind me. I mean, he shot it straight, and then he did something often we don't think about. He shared his heart. He shared his dreams. He was fully human. The Scripture says that, in Hebrews, that in the days of his flesh, he cried out to God with loud cries and tears. Jesus wasn't Superman. He wasn't like God in a man suit. He was fully human with all the emotions and all the temptations and all the needs that all of us have, so he, by the power of the Holy Spirit, could model for you and model for me. This is what it looks like to live surrendered to the Father. And then what he modeled is, none of us can do it alone. Remember, even when he was going to the cross, he said, after the Lord's Supper, I desire to eat this meal with you. And then he said, I need you all.
Would you pray with me? If Jesus needed people to pray with him and stand with him and encourage him in his toughest times, how much more do you and how much more do I? But he didn't just model it. He served, developed a small group. He became a true friend. I mean, a real friend through thick and thin to those disciples and to many others. And then he taught very specifically about biblical community. And he taught some of the most outrageous, radical things that are so counterintuitive.
Are you ready? He just taught about community. He taught, greatness is achieved by humility and servanthood, not power and prestige.
Now, think of that. You want real community. For most of us, well, people will like me if I'm powerful or if I'm rich or if I have a lot of likes or if I'm this on social media or if I get to the top of my game or I'm a great this or a great that. And Jesus said, disciples, greatness comes when you consider others more important than yourself, humility. Greatness comes.
You want to be first? Be the servant of all. And this conversation isn't like in the early days. I'm quoting out of Luke chapter 22. They're on their way to the Last Supper. And Jesus is walking a bit behind them and they're arguing about something. And he comes and asks them, hey, what's the deal?
And they were arguing about who's the greatest. And what I love is he didn't reprove them. He didn't say you should never have thoughts of doing something great with your life.
He just changed the paradigm. He said, do you want to be great? Be the servant. You want to be number one?
You be the last. What he was telling him is, I want you to understand that having dreams and ambitions and drive, that's not a bad thing. But what you need to do is you need to measure success the right way. And in community, what makes community great is when there's servanthood, when there's other-centeredness. And this counterintuitive thing happens, and you've experienced it.
I've experienced it. When we give our life away, that's when we receive and have the deepest connections with people. He also taught that God's blessing and favor come when we put the needs of others first. Later that very same night, he would wash their feet. And Peter would say, you know the story, right?
Not me, Lord. And Jesus would say, if I don't do this, you don't have any part in me. And when he gets completely done, he gave them a theological lesson. He said, I am your Master and Lord. And they all nodded yes, yeah.
If I, your Master and Lord, do this for you, serve you, blessed are you if you do this for one another. The very last lesson, I mean the visual that burned into their mind, and they all came in, by the way. The context is they were all too proud to wash anybody's feet. And the reason that everybody's feet was dirty, sitting around a low table where you would eat like this and your feet were near someone's face is because everyone thought they were above that role. And I think they felt humiliated when Jesus came in and he took the role, not just of a servant but the lowest servant in a household who would wash people's feet.
And see, what's made the faith, what's made Christianity, what's changed the world is this counter-intuitive, other-centered, loving focus toward other people that makes no sense in our flesh. I mean, I'm like you. I want me. I want mine. I want to be in control. I want to be first. I don't like to wait in line. I don't like to wait in the grocery store. I don't like to wait to get on a plane.
And when I get on the plane, I don't want to be last to get my feet right. That's who we are. But when by the power of the Holy Spirit, because we're practicing coming before God, and we rub up and we see him more and more for who he is, and then we grasp that we're his child and that we're loved and forgiven, we're accepted, and out of that can flow an other-centered focus on others, it's just an amazing, beautiful thing that begins to happen in relationships. And that's how community gets built. Jesus said love is measured by sacrifice, not by words or not by emotions.
You know, we're all kind of caught up with how do I feel, and I feel this way about that, and I think they think bad about me. And Jesus said, here's what you need to understand. Community, at the core of it, the Father loves the Son, the Son loves the Father, the Father loves the Holy Spirit. In the Trinity, there's this mutuality, there's this other-centered focus. And he said, what I want you all to share in your relationships as my new adopted family in Christ is what we share in the Godhead. And what he said is that love is costly.
There's real sacrifice. I can love people in superficial ways. I can love people in ways that appear that I really care. And then I can love people where, wow, Lord, I don't want to do this. I want that for me, not for them.
But by your grace, I'm going to choose to put their needs first. For me, the hardest area, talk about a place for community, has been in my marriage. I came from an alcoholic home. My wife came from an alcoholic home.
My goal was I want to marry some woman that makes me complete, that makes my life work out, who's beautiful and loves me and all that good stuff. And I thought I had it. And she thought she had it. And we both love God and we both kind of did our dating God's way. And then we got married and I found out she was, are you ready? Well, my wife was selfish.
And then she was married to someone even more selfish. And we couldn't resolve conflicts and we didn't know how to communicate. And little by little by little, we went back to God's Word and we got some good counsel in the community of God's people. And those struggles and those things that came out of our family of origin and those wounds and those hurts, we were both just deeply insecure. We both longed to belong. We both were so afraid because we either were measured by what we could do or we had been through great rejection.
We live in a world of people that are just like that. And we, the body of Christ, first and foremost with one another, we need to love each other. And when we do, biblical community is one of the most powerful witnesses on the face of the earth. This is Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. And you've been listening to part one of Chip's message, Practice Number Two, Do Life in Community, from our series BIO, Three Essential Practices to Becoming More Like Jesus.
Chip will be back shortly to share some helpful application for us to think about. It's been said that the 21st century church is thousands of miles wide, but only an inch deep, meaning many people identify as Christians, but few truly live out a life that honors God. In this new series, Chip takes us on a journey through the Gospels, revealing the profile of an authentic follower of Christ. Together, we'll explore the discipleship path Jesus modeled while on earth, built around three simple yet powerful practices that will help us live out our faith.
You're not going to want to miss a single program of this meaningful series. Well, I'm joined in studio now by Chip, and Chip, you've spent a lot of time the last few years talking about the importance of reaching today's young people with the message and the power of the Gospel. Where does this passion come from? Well, Dave, you know, it could have come from statistics that we're losing almost 70 percent of our young people, and I could give people lots of reasons and rationale. But where it really came from is I live in a place in America that long before it went all across the world, the brokenness among young people, the gender issues, the identity issues, the whole sexual identity struggles, the depression, the anxiety, the suicides. And what I just see is brokenness and a lack of hope. I've sat in my living room with Teresa, with young people who don't know how to manage their money, their relationships aren't working. Many of them have really good jobs.
They've come from either here or all around the world. And just with a little bit of food and a little bit of love and praying with them and caring for them, and instead of assuming that they don't care about God and they're just all hardened and evil and secular, what we found was as we just opened our home and as we opened the Scriptures with them and said, you know, maybe you've never heard or maybe you've never really understood, and next week, why don't you just read this and we'll discuss this next week. And as we prayed for people, I just see how they're so lost and there's such pain. And the truth of God's Word, when it's wrapped in a genuine, caring relationship, God rescues them.
And that's our heart. We want to rescue the next generation. We want to help parents and grandparents and pastors not be frustrated or upset or angry, but actually love and then get the truth and the heart of young people's lives so they might have hope and life instead of brokenness and confusion. And that's why we're so committed to it, and that's why we're asking the Living on the Edge family to come along with us, help us, pray, give. We can make a difference together. Thanks, Chip.
Well, if you feel like God is moving you to partner with us, now's a great time. As Chip said, thanks to a handful of donors, every dollar we receive between now and December 31st will be doubled dollar for dollar. To send a gift, call us at 888-333-6003.
Again, that's 888-333-6003, or go to LivingOnTheEdge.org. Tap Listeners, tap Donate, and thank you in advance for doing whatever God leads you to do. Well, Chip, today you explained how humility and servanthood are the foundations of biblical community. Why are they so critical, and why don't we see these qualities better modeled in our churches and small groups?
Wow, Dave, that is a piercing question. Maybe to back up just a minute, you know, as I think about the answer to that question, obviously Jesus talks about humility and putting others first. But, you know, all of us are human, and I think unconsciously we all tend to be asking questions very at the soul level. Like, who cares for me? Who's going to help me feel accepted and apart and belong? Who's going to reach out and be my friend? And so we go into work, or we go to church, we go to a small group, or we go into a relational environment, and unconsciously we're asking, who will love me?
Who looks acceptable? Who's going to take an interest in me? And because everyone else is asking that, often no one does, and we feel isolated and alone. And for introverts especially, it's very hard. I mean, it's very challenging to be the person to take the initiative. But it's what Jesus calls us to do. Really, it's a mindset.
Jesus is saying to the disciples, yes, I get it. You all want to be number one. You all want to be great.
You all want to be first. That's human. He says that's not necessarily bad. What he says is, here's the way to get there. And so it's a mindset. It's walking into that group.
It's going to work. It's going to church with eyes that say, who has needs? Who is hurting?
Who looks lonely? It's asking questions. It's how are things going with you? It's taking an interest in others. And so authentic community really begins when we get out of ourselves pride, get our focus on others' humility, and then our actions are about how could I serve this person?
It is super counterintuitive. But what I can tell you, when you start to practice it even a little at a time, you'll see authentic community begin to blossom in your relationships. Give it a try today. Great challenge, Chip. Hey, before we go, I want to remind you that the Chip Ingram app is an easy way to share messages or complete series with others. So whenever you're encouraged by what you hear, I hope you'll pass it along to a friend or loved one who'd benefit from hearing it. And be sure to tell them how it made a difference in your life. Well, be sure to join us next time as Chip continues his series, Bio, three essential practices to becoming more like Jesus. Until then, I'm Dave Drouie saying thanks for listening to this Edition of Living on the Edge.
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