What Now? What Next? - Healing Not Hostility, Part 2

Let me ask you, who is the person in your life who you disagree with on everything? It doesn't matter if you're talking about the news or politics or religion, it seems that you're always on the opposite sides of everything.

If you're tired of butting heads with that person and you wish there was a better way to really engage them, even love them, stay with me. That's today. Welcome to this Edition of Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. I'm Dave Drew, and the mission of these daily programs is to intentionally disciple Christians through the Bible teaching of Chip Ingram. Thanks for joining us as Chip continues his series, What Now, What Next, by wrapping up his message on healing, not hostility. As a quick reminder, if you miss a portion of this program, let me encourage you to catch up through the Chip Ingram app. It's a great way to listen to Living on the Edge anytime.

Well here's Chip with today's talk. Jesus would say, you've heard the law says that punishment must match the injury. You know, an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.

But I say to you, do not resist an evil person. If someone slaps you on the right cheek, offer the other cheek also. If you're sued in court and your shirt is taken from you, give your coat too.

If a soldier demands that you carry his gear for a mile, which they could do legally, carry it for two miles. Give to those who ask. Don't turn away from those who want to borrow. You've heard the law says, love your neighbor and hate your enemies. But I say, love your enemies. Pray for those who persecute you. In that way, you'll be acting as true children of your Father in heaven.

Well, why? How does he treat people? For he gives sunlight to both evil and the good, and he sends rain on the just and on the unjust. If you love only those who love you, what reward is there for that? Even corrupt tax collectors do that much.

If you're kind to only your friends, how are you different from anyone else? Even pagans do that. If you've grown up in the church or lived in America for a long time, we can read comments like that, and it's just like what I heard.

You know, we're familiar. It sounds like something we ought to put on a plaque and buy at a Christian bookstore if there still were Christian bookstores. It's the most radical thoughts ever spoken by Jesus. And yes, you know, we could, you know, do a lot of more developed teaching in the front end of that and what he meant by the slap on the cheek and the insult and all the rest, but the thesis of this is really easy. We don't give people what they deserve. We don't give them justice. We treat them the way God has treated us, who, while we were his enemy, Christ died in our place. The question is, how do you do this? How do you practice this kind of completely different attitude?

First and foremost, in and of ourselves we can't. But as time went on, the apostle Paul is going to say to a very unique community in Rome where there were little pockets. You know, we somehow think the church, you know, back then is like the church today. There were little pockets meeting in multiple homes, and they were very unique.

It might be a little Jewish group over here and a Gentile group over here, and it might be one nationality over here and another nationality over here. And Paul is writing this letter to pull all these people together, and as he says, I'm on my way to Spain. Boy, what a visionary. I'm going to stop in Rome.

He never made it past Rome. He says, but I want you all to get really clear about what the gospel is. First three chapters, all of sin and fall short of the glory of God. Chapters four and five, God by his grace has saved you if you will just believe. Chapters six through eight, this is how you grow in holiness. And chapters nine through 11, here's a parenthesis.

I want you to know, Jewish Christians, that God will fulfill all his promises to David on the throne and Abraham about the land so you can trust him. Chapter 12, in light of all God's grace, this is how you live. And the first thing is you offer yourself and you go into a journey and a process not to be conformed to the world. And I want to skip toward the end where he explains how to practically live out Jesus' command to be a healing agent instead of be hostile.

Command number one, Romans 12 verse 17, never pay back evil with more evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see that you're honorable. Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone. Literally, it's consider what's right in the sight of all men. And the word consider means it's a protracted thought to understand that even those you most radically disagree with and whoever that is, another race, another political party, another background, another denomination, people who philosophically are different than you, consider. In other words, everyone lives in a way that makes sense to them.

And connection with other human beings starts with empathy. It starts with, well, this is how they grew up. This is how they think. This is how they live. So actually, I can see how, though I completely disagree, that's how they perceive life.

We so quickly, we have an us and we have a them. And we're right, whoever we are, and they're wrong. He says, don't do that.

He says, in fact, it goes beyond that. Dear friends, never take your own revenge. Leave room for the righteous anger of God, for the scripture says, I will revenge, I will repay them back, says the Lord. Instead, if your enemy's hungry, feed him. If he's thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals of shame upon their heads.

Three different commands. Don't pay back evil. Never take revenge. If your enemy has a need, give him what he needs. And then finally, the axiomatic principle, do not be overcome with evil, but overcome evil with good.

The very first time in my life I got to experience the power of this was, I played basketball in college, and I was the only Christian on the team. And we had a guy who'd been in prison. He was in Vietnam. He had scars like this.

He'd been in prison for quite a while for being a drug dealer. And I played in a small college, very competitive. And the only reason he played on a small college was because of all he'd been through, his hands weren't very good. He was about 6'9 and had about a 42-inch vertical.

And I mean, there's times where he'd get a rebound in his elbows, his head would be over the rim. And in his words, he described himself, I'm an evil man. And I have a testimony. He was. And I remember I was going into my dorm room one day, and another room was cracked, and the RA was there, and this fella, and they were smoking dope.

And it was illegal back then. And if he'd get caught a third time, he's going back to prison for a long time. And I just, you know, you make eye contact, I'm thinking, oh, brother. So I'm at my door, and I feel something on my head, and he turns me around, and then he lifts me up with my chin like this, and he looks me in the eye. Little man. Actually, he didn't say little man, but I can't repeat what he said. You say a word. Let me tell you something. I've killed people, and I will kill you.

I don't know if you've ever been threatened by someone who really means it. I was scared to death. And then I hated him. And I got eaten up with hanging. And I was a Pete Maravich fan growing up, and so I did all those drills before Steph was doing them.

And so in warm-ups, I'd throw a behind-the-back pass really hard, right through the hands, slip through his hands right in the face. I just paid him back, paid him back. I did it in practice. And I mean, I couldn't sleep at night. I had acid stomach. He treated me like dirt. I was a freshman, so you know, everything from carrying his bag to—and I remember getting with the spiritual leader of our campus ministry.

I'd just become a Christian. I mean, not much over a year. And I said, I don't know what to do.

I hate this man. I mean, I don't know. And some of you have experienced this. It is a scary thing. We think somehow that all of us are beyond doing something horrendous. None of us are beyond doing something horrendous.

Check out Nazi Germany. And I'll never forget this older brother says, I can solve this for you, but you'll have to trust me. I said, okay. He read Romans chapter 12. Actually, he started verse 14 where it says, bless those who persecute you, bless and curse not. And he goes, what I want you to do is I want you to start praying for him every day. Not that God will strike him dead, which was where I was at. And then he says, I want you to think of every way possible that you can bless him and help him. And he goes, you don't have to feel like it. And I just, he left.

I thought, man, you're on drugs. I'm not doing that. And the Spirit convicted me. And I just, I made a decision, no more behind the back passes, no more look passes.

When he made a basket, I actually cheered. I would go into the locker room and when you undress the head stuff and we put them in bags and the manager would take them, I would pick his stuff up and do it. At the training table, instead of him getting on me, I would go and say, hey, Jared, you want something else? And I mean, I did that and you know what? Nothing happened.

And then we got to the end of the year, big tournament and he was a senior, he was graduating. And I'll never forget, he said, you know, I don't believe in God. I'm evil and I know I'm evil. I don't know if there's a hell I'm going there.

By the way, he was extremely smart and an amazing artist. And he said, but I'm done with you, kid. Because it's not fun anymore. Because I don't believe in anything at all about Christianity and I've met so many hypocrites.

But if I was ever going to be one, I think I'd want to be one like you. Because there's only two people on this whole team that I respect. Me, I'm evil. And you, because at least you're living out your faith.

That was it. Peace. Now, if he knew what I was thinking most of the time, living out my faith. But you know, we've confused obedience and feelings. You don't have to feel like doing what's right. Obedience is doing what's right.

In fact, I think God finds more delight when you don't want to read the Bible and you read it. When you don't want to pray and you pray. When you don't want to give and yet you understand, I need to. When you really, your emotions tell you one thing, which is often your flesh, and you say, Lord, this is my offering.

I'm choosing to do it out of loyalty and love to you. The second time I got to experience this was I pastored in Santa Cruz for about 12 years. And we had a very significant homosexual population. We had a lot of runaway teens and a lot of people involved in the occult. And it was especially significant with a lot of HIV patients. And I remember sitting down with, he was a former mayor, he was a business owner.

I think he personally was a homosexual. And we sat down and had lunch downtown Santa Cruz. And I was pastoring a church that had grown pretty much and developed a little deal with about 50 other churches that we met once a month. And we came up with a dream and a plan in obedience to what Jesus said.

How could we help people that are HIV positive? And so we teamed up. We had a deal with all the other pastors and we worked out a thing with the county. And we actually went through training and we could, anybody with HIV, we would drive to the doctor, drive to the grocery store. We would honor the county.

We would not try and proselyte. But we got permission if they asked us why we're doing what we're doing, we could tell them about Jesus. And so we did. And so we did the same thing with runaway teens.

We did the same thing with the poor. And it was a coalition. And I'm sitting across the table from this person who, once we got talking, we were roughly the same age. We both became revolutionaries in college. He went to Berkeley.

And the sit-ins, the radical, the 70s. And I went away to college and became a Christian. And I became this radical crazy zealot for Jesus.

And he became this radical crazy zealot for progressivism. And we talked about what we were doing. And I said, how can we serve? He was the mayor. And what can we do to serve you here? And I'll never forget.

It was about an hour and a half lunch. And I never got thinking, man, I disagree with everything with this guy. But I sure like him. I mean, I really liked him. You know, there's a lot of people that don't have intellectual integrity.

He did. I thought, you believe this? This is your view of mankind? You think they're basically good? You think this is the answer? And you're acting on it. I can respect that.

No, I don't think man is basically good. I think Jesus is the answer. But we sat across the table and he cared about HIV-positive people.

We didn't ask him how they got it. And we talked about runaway teens and what was happening. And we talked about the poor. And around those things, we partnered together.

And you know, here's what happens. You know, there wasn't any thems anymore. You know, because of my basketball background, I mean, I've been a minority. I've been the white guy on a black team. And what I find is a lot of white people, you don't have any black friends or any black friends. Some people don't have white friends. You know, you make statements, but do you have any friends that are in the homosexual community that you understand?

What's their story and where they've been and where are they coming from and where are their hurts? It's engagement. It's speaking the truth without compromise. It's caring.

We don't have to agree with everyone. But what a difference it makes. He says, in doing this, you will heap burning coals on their head.

This is an amazing picture. I didn't grow up studying the Bible and I remember thinking early on, wow, this is great. Like, if you do the right thing, God will zap them.

And I wanted him to zap this guy. Like, hey, you know. And then I did a little research later on and in the ancient Near East, if someone had realized that they had made a big mistake and they were repenting, they would build a fire and they would take the coals and put it in a pan and then they'd put a towel under the pan and they'd put the towel on their head and they would walk through the village. And they'd walk through the village and they're saying, these hot coals are burning out my bad thinking.

I was wrong. See, when you love people in ways where they know in their heart of hearts they don't deserve it because of how they've spoken to you, what they said about you, what they posted, what they tweeted. And instead of responding in kind, you respond no compromise, but in love. It often is the very thing that creates the sense of why would people do that? In other words, it's a picture of how God changes people's hearts. The principle is we can't do this in our own strength. But we often quote this passage I put in here, Ephesians chapter 3, verse 20 and 21, you know, oh praise God, not to him who is able to do exceedingly, abundantly, beyond all we ask and take according to his power. Like, aren't we glad God does great things? Well, let's read it a little more carefully.

How about this? Now all glory to God who is able by his mighty power at work in us. You have the power within you with a surrendered life and commitment to his word in the context of encouraging deep community to return good for evil, to not respond on Facebook, to not become one of those angry, resentful, bitter, fearful Christians who alienate people outside the church and inside the church because his power works within us what? To accomplish more than we could think or ask. And what that means in summary is this. In America's post-truth, post-Christian culture, it demands that we live first as citizens of heaven, Philippians 3, and second, citizens of America.

For a lot of people, you see a lot of posts who stole our country and two extremes. We can't succumb to angry engagement, often revolving around nationalism or fearful withdrawal, which is separatism. Wisdom. I wish it was an easy path, a simple path, but wisdom demands that we reject accommodation that's masked in the name of love, where we cave in to what's true and don't stick to Scripture on all issues, including morality and gender and all the rest. And we have to reject personal preservation. Mask is truth. Oh, this is truth, but really it's about our rights and us keeping our world our way. And we have to, I think, reject silos and separatism, mask and purity, where we become little groups that we wall ourselves off. God's calling is healing instead of hostility. We must be agents of healing without compromise. We must move out of our Christian silos and subcultures and enter the fray and fight hate, fight prejudice, fight injustice, fight legalism, fight division with love in action and words of truth. It doesn't begin with some Messiah, some movement, some group, somewhere, somehow.

It starts with me and my heart and my life and you. And there was a little group of people that took Jesus at his word and they turned the world upside down with far less resources than we have. God, thank you that you have given power inside of our human bodies as we have trusted you to do things actually as amazing as raising the dead. Lord, it will take a miracle to replace bitterness and hate and prejudice and replace it with empathy and concern. Lord, it will take incredible power to not cave in and to speak truth firmly, kindly, lovingly, what will be viewed as anti-intellectual and bigoted and even hate speech. God, would you please allow us beginning here, beginning today in a fresh way to let our loyalty be to you, to make us healing agents and will you forgive us for our hostility, the things we've posted, the things we've said, the people we've blamed. Lord, we want to ask that your kingdom come, not ours, and that your will be done, not ours, on earth as it is in heaven. In Jesus' name, amen. Chip will be right back with his application for this message, Healing Not Hostility, from his series, What Now? What Next? Have recent events in our world opened your eyes to some major flaws in the 21st century church?

Are you wrestling with the status quo and the old adage, that's just how things have always been done? Well, in this new series, Chip encourages us to revisit the foundational truths Jesus taught and reconsider how we are to lovingly engage with people. By using the word Christ as an acronym, Chip highlights six life-changing ways we can continue making disciples, especially in these disruptive times. You don't want to miss a single part of this timely series. For more information about What Now? What Next? go to livingontheedge.org or call 888-333-6003.

That's 888-333-6003 or livingontheedge.org. Well, Chip, today you said one way to better understand someone with different beliefs or values is to walk in their shoes, you know, see life from their perspective. But before we can do that, we have to do some serious self-reflection. Now, can you take just a minute and explain that a little bit more to us?

Absolutely, Dave. You know, it's so easy during this time to feel hostile and to be angry and to respond in ways. And what I've learned sometimes is, yes, it's the external things. But if we have unresolved issues in our own heart, when we feel like you don't really like you, it's just really hard to give love and healing to others. And I remember early in our marriage, my wife really had a hard time communicating her love. And as we went and got some counseling, it became obvious that not only did she have a very low self-image, she didn't really like herself. She'd made through some very painful experiences. And I remember we started reviewing these cards that were called affirmation cards.

And then over the years, she added more and more and I watched her bloom. And what I saw was as she began to see herself as loved and valued and important and unique in God's eyes, and that she was safe and secure, then what I saw that overflow in her ability to share that with others. And you know, I think one of the great things for our listeners right now is if you find yourself spewing or you know someone that's struggling, we have these affirmation cards, the very ones that my wife and I reviewed every morning for two years, as we were trying to learn how to accept and receive God's love so we could give it to one another. These affirmation cards have been just something God has used in thousands and thousands of people's lives. So Dave, why don't you take a minute and tell people how they can get them and how we can get loved so we can give it.

Well, as Chip just said, the only way we can be agents of healing in this hostile world is to first understand God's love for us. And these affirmation cards will help you do that. They'll expose the lies you believe about yourself and instead fill your mind with powerful truths about who you are in Jesus. Let me encourage you, get a set of these affirmation cards today. And if you'd like to give them as a Christmas gift, you only have a few days left to place your order so your gift will arrive before December 25th. For more great Christmas gift ideas, go to livingontheedge.org or call us at 888-333-6003.

App listeners, tap special offers. Well, Chip, before we hear your application, I'd like to quote something you said today. You said, we must move out of our Christian silos and subcultures and enter the fray and fight hate, fight prejudice, fight injustice, fight legalism, fight division with love in action and words in truth.

Now, that's a boatload of ideas, so could you break down what you meant? Absolutely, Dave. Here's what I really want to say. I'm calling my fellow brothers and sisters, including pastors, to repent, to change our mind. We have to stop spewing anger about the things in our country and in the church and in political parties and with family members who disagree with us.

And we have just allowed this thing to take a life of its own, and it's ungodly and it's wrong. Second, there's another group that as the culture has changed, we have to stop hiding because some of our views biblically are unpopular. We can't back away from the Bible is the Word of God. We can't back away from what the Bible teaches about gender issues. Compassionate, understanding, absolutely. But we can't now kind of act like everything's okay and be quiet.

We have to say it kindly, lovingly. And third, we have to stop posting and talking and start loving and serving. I'm involved in a church here in San Jose that in the midst of all of this, a very young church, very multicultural, but what I've watched them do is change the hearts of their strongest antagonist because of what they've done. The schools were closed, so they brought in food trucks for the kids that normally would get lunch or breakfast at school.

They paid for the college admissions in this low-income area for kids that didn't even have the money to apply to college. They loved the teachers and things in such a way that one guy sent them a video that said, I'm anti-religion. I'm really basically anti-Christianity, but I don't know who you are or where you come from, but the way you've loved our students, loved our teachers, and loved the school, I just can't deny that whatever you're doing is beautiful and wonderful. That was Jesus' command for his early disciples, and that's the command for us. Can I encourage you? Be an agent of healing.

Stop talking. Start acting. Find a need and meet it.

And maybe start loving someone that you don't like very well and watch God work. As we close, I want to say thank you to those who make this program possible through your generous financial support. If you found today's program helpful, but have never supported us financially, there's never been a better time than right now. When you give a gift to Living on the Edge from now till December 31st, it will be matched dollar for dollar thanks to some very generous friends of the ministry. Making a donation is easy. Just go to LivingOnTheEdge.org, tap donate on the app, or give us a call at 888-333-6003. On behalf of Chip and everyone here, thank you in advance for your generosity. Until next time, this is Dave Druey saying thanks for listening to this Edition of Living on the Edge.