This Faith in Finance podcast is underwritten in part by Praxis Investment Management. Since 1994, Praxis has offered investment products designed to meet the practical needs of everyday investors while supporting positive change through impact strategies that go beyond screening. Guided by faith values, Praxis strives to make a positive impact on the world. Learn more at PraxisInvests.com. Have you ever used your giving to steer decisions and send a message?
Hi, I'm Rob West. It might seem harmless or even wise to designate your giving or withhold it when you disagree with leadership, but when our generosity becomes a tool for control, we cross a line. Today, we're continuing our Why We Give series by exposing this subtle yet destructive motive and pointing to a better way. And then it's on to your calls at 800-525-7000. That's 800-525-7000.
This is Faith in Finance, biblical wisdom for your financial journey.
Now, let's be honest. No one likes the word control when it's pointed at them.
However, in church life, it manifests more than we might expect.
Sometimes people give to specific ministries because they don't trust how the church uses general funds, or they withhold giving when a leadership decision doesn't go their way. Maybe a new worship style, a change in staffing, or a shift in the budget makes them uncomfortable, so they respond by tightening their wallets. On the surface, it might look like financial stewardship, but underneath, it can be a way of saying, I want things to go my way, and I'll give or not give to make that happen. That's not generosity, that's leverage, and scripture warns against it. In Mark 7, Jesus confronts the Pharisees about a practice known as Corbin.
It was a way of designated money as dedicated to God, which sounds noble, but it was being used to avoid the responsibility of caring for one's parents in their elder years. Here's how gotQuestions.org explains it. The Pharisees took a legitimate Corbin offering and used it in an illegitimate and devious way to defraud their parents. Jesus tells the Pharisees that their misuse of Corbin was an evil rationale to avoid doing what they should. The issue wasn't the gift itself, it was the motive behind it.
They were giving in a way that allowed them to maintain control, even if it meant dishonoring others and disobeying God. Sadly, that same spirit still lingers in how some people give today. They say things like, I'll give, but only to missions, not to salaries, or I'm not giving while that pastor's still here.
Sometimes it's unspoken, but it's still there. Giving becomes conditional, and those conditions often reveal an unhealthy desire to control. But here's what we need to remember. Giving isn't about control. It's about surrender.
Psalm 24, 1 says, the earth is the Lord's and everything in it. That includes our money. Our role isn't to use it to steer the church. It's to steward it faithfully for God's purposes. In Acts 4, we see the early church sharing resources freely.
People sold land and possessions and laid the proceeds at the apostles' feet. There was trust. There was unity. There was surrender. No one said, here's my gift, but make sure it goes where I want it to go.
Now, does this mean churches should avoid transparency or accountability? Of course not. Leaders are called to steward resources wisely and communicate openly. Openly and transparently. But giving with strings attached isn't about wisdom.
It's about control. And control is the opposite of trust. Let me ask you: what's driving your generosity? Is it love, faith, worship, or is it preference, power, or payback? When we give to get our way or to withhold support until things go our way, we're no longer giving with a cheerful heart.
We're treating God's work like a contract, not a calling. And here's the good news: when we let go of control, we find peace. We don't have to carry the weight of every decision. We don't have to micromanage God's kingdom. We can give with open hands and trust that He's working through His church, even when it looks different than we expected.
So, what should you do if you recognize that control has been shaping your giving?
Well, first, confess it to the Lord. He's gracious and patient. Ask Him to help you give with a posture of surrender, not leverage. Second, practice releasing your preferences. That doesn't mean you stop asking questions.
Or seeking accountability. It just means your generosity isn't based on getting your way. And finally, give with trust. Trust in God. Trust in His ability to work through imperfect leaders.
And trust that your giving, when done with the right heart, honors Him. Because when we give to control, we're placing ourselves at the center. But when we give in faith, we're putting God where He belongs, at the center of it all. If you want to dive deeper into the heart behind generosity, check out Faithful Steward, our quarterly magazine for Faith Phi partners. When you give $35 a month or more, or $400 annually, you'll receive this encouraging resource and join a community committed to biblical financial wisdom.
You can learn more at faithphy.com/slash partner.
Next week, we'll wrap up our series by looking at the third motivation that often sneaks into our giving: self-righteousness. That's coming up next week. All right, your calls are next, and I can't wait. Call right now: 800-525-7,000. That's 800-525-7,000.
I'm Rob West, and this is Faith and Finance. We'll be right back. Are you looking for a better way to align your faith with your finances? The FaithFi app is here to help. With tools to track your spending, plan your giving, and grow in wise stewardship.
You'll learn to see money not as your security, but as a tool for God's glory. Rooted in biblical principles, Faith Phi equips you to trust God more fully and steward his resources faithfully. Download the FaithFi app today from your app store or visit FaithFy.com and click App. We are grateful for support from Praxis Investment Management. Since 1994, Praxis has offered investment products designed to meet practical needs for everyday investors seeking to steward their assets consistent with their desire to promote positive social and environmental impacts.
Praxis aims to bring a faith-based approach to ETFs, mutual funds, multifund portfolio solutions, and money market accounts, reflecting their 500-year-old Anabaptist Christian faith tradition. More information is available at PraxisInvest.com. Great to have you with us today on Faith in Finance. I'm Rob West. Looking forward to taking your calls and questions today.
That number to get in on the conversation: 800-525-7,000. Again, that's 800-525-7,000. We've got some lines open for you. We're ready to tackle whatever is on your mind in your financial life today.
So, whatever it is, if it's a spending plan, if it's debt repayment, perhaps it's navigating the markets, we'd love to tackle any of those topics. Again, 800-525-7,000. You can call right now. Let's go to Chicago. Donna, how can I help you?
Hello, thank you for taking my call.
So we have a situation from My husband's First marriage. He has a son. And it has a small family and He has a hard time keeping a job. And He tries, but they let him go. whatever reason um So then She works.
And they're behind on their bills So what And not often, but occasionally he'll call up and he'll ask for money and my husband, he helps him out. But then We know that they are parting. They're not believers. We know that they they probably buy some pot cigarettes, which are very expensive. And we just know that if they were to cut these items from their list.
they could probably have a lot more comfortable way of living.
So, and he has a tendency sometimes to manipulate my husband. He'll call him and tell him that they're going to lose their home, which they might. And then that the kids are gonna be, you know, sort of the kids are gonna be living on the street and So, my husband gets torn and doesn't know what to do.
So, I've wanted to call for some time now because we just really need some biblical guidance. He won't take advice. And then he gets mad and he won't talk to my husband, so We just need some wise counsel because we want to help them, but we also know that. that they're spending Their money unwisely. And so we don't want to enable that.
So hopefully, you can say a prayer and just give us some sound advice, you know?
Well, I'd be delighted to. And I know this one is challenging because we love our kids. We certainly don't want to see them suffer. And we want to be a blessing to them. And especially if you have the ability to do that, you have the means to provide.
It's hard to resist. And yet, and I think you know this, I'm kind of hearing it a bit in your voice, but I'll just affirm and perhaps verbalize what I think you're already thinking. And that is, you know, you can do far more harm by continuing to provide resources which increases dependency and supports unwise lifestyle choices.
So you're basically by continuing to provide your hard-earned money to this adult child, you are encouraging bad financial habits. And from a spiritual perspective, you're throwing money at a struggling. Child, which is shielding your adult son from hardship, which may absolutely be the way that the Lord is going to get his attention. And so, you know, I think you just need to be really careful and thoughtful about this. And I think there are other ways to help.
You know, I think, you know, you and your husband need to be on the same page. You need to sit down before you go to the adult son and have the conversation and make sure you all are aligned and really make it a matter of prayer. But, you know, if you do go and offer some assistance, it needs to be tied to you really helping to support and reinforce wise decision making. You know, so it could be something like if you pay toward debt, we'll, you know, match it. You know, things like that that are reinforcing the right behaviors.
It could be, you know, you're willing to help with a certain outcome, especially if there's Grandkids involved, you know, but it's going to be directly to, you know, you're going to pay the bill directly, not just giving the cash, because you know that may be used for, in fact, you have good, you know, reason to believe it's being used for things that would not be in alignment with biblical values. And so you make that, you know, check directly out to that particular entity or, you know, helping with that bill. All of that could be predicated on this son, you know, walking with a certified Christian financial counselor. You know, maybe there needs to be a third party here. You all don't need to be the accountability here, but perhaps your willingness to help in the future could be tied to them providing, you know, walking along with somebody that they're accountable to.
And that person, if your son will give you permission, you know, being willing to check in with you along the way and say, hey, here's how it's going.
Now, at the end of the day, could this go sideways and it provide a wedge in the relationship? Yes. Could it mean that? He stops talking to your husband for a period of time? Absolutely.
And that's hard. But I think the last thing we would want to do is continue to provide help that is not going to allow the Lord to get his attention to the extent he wants to do that. And this is the way to do it. It's not going to reinforce any kind of wise financial decision making and stewardship in the future because there's no reason to make any kind of change. We're shielding him from the consequences of mismanagement and unwise decision making.
And the longer you do that, the longer it's going to take for him to learn from this, surrender his life to Jesus, which is far more important than anything, put him as the king and the Lord of his life and his money, and then begin to heed wise counsel from God's word about how to manage what's left. Does that make sense, though? Yes, yes it does, thank you.
Okay. That's hard. You know, this is not easy. And I think, you know, what it means is we make this a matter of prayer. You know, I think you need to clarify your financial expectations.
I think, you know, you may decide to exercise tough love here. And that's probably just given the history of this and how long it's going on and what you're experiencing. I think perhaps the next season is about saying, listen, we love you. We just can't continue to support the decisions you're making. And so we need to stop for this time.
And that may have relational consequences, but I think you can rest in the fact that, you know, our main objective is that he'd surrender his life to the Lord and then the financial decision making based on God's word would follow. Donna, thanks for your call today. We'll be praying for you. Let us know how it turns out. Let's go to Lakeland, Florida.
Hi, Susan. How can I help? Hi, I'm wanting to assign a power of attorney, but unfortunately, I don't have a family member. But I can ask Is what do you recommend? Yeah.
So, if you don't have a trusted family member or friend, Susan, to appoint as your power of attorney, you can hire a professional to serve in that role. Typical options for that would be an elder law attorney or an estate planning attorney that can be appointed as power of attorney for finances and legal matters. There will be a cost to that, but you might start with the person that drafted your will or other estate-related documents. It could be a financial advisor that's willing to serve in that capacity. There are also care managers with either nursing homes or a social work background that can serve as a power of attorney for health care directives.
And so, this would be a geriatric care manager. But it's not unusual for an elder law attorney to act as both the financial and the health care power of attorney. And so, I would perhaps, if you're looking for someone and you don't have that friend or family member that the Lord has called to yourself. Your mind to serve in that role, then I would reach out to a certified kingdom advisor in your area on our website at faith5.com and then ask for a referral to an estate planning attorney who shares your values as a believer. And then, you know, perhaps you put somebody in that position in more of a corporate role.
Does that make sense though? Yes, it sure does. Yeah, thank you. Thank you. I appreciate you.
All right. Thank you. You're welcome, Susan. May the Lord bless you. This is Faith and Finance.
Lines are open, 800-525-7000. We'll be right back. We work, we earn, we save. But is that all there is? The book of Ecclesiastes gives us an entirely new perspective on money that impacts our day-to-day lives.
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For more information, visit kingdomadvisors.com. That's kingdomadvisors.com. Thanks for joining us today on Faith and Finance. We're taking your calls and questions today. Before we head back to the phones, we did have a caller, Gloria, who was not able to be on the air with us, but she wanted to know whether it's a good idea to get life insurance for children and grandchildren.
And, you know, this question does come up periodically, and it's a good one. I think just related to whether or not that's wise as you think about being a steward of God's resources. And I would just say, you know, generally, no, that's not my advice. I just think it's unnecessary. You know, when we look at the purpose of insurance, the purpose of insurance is to replace income or to offset the risk that exists in the passing of a person where dependents are counting on their income.
So kids generally don't have income to replace. Which is the core purpose of life insurance. And so I think the bottom line is: you know, that's not, I think, a necessary use of God's resources. And beyond that, if you're really looking for giving a small legacy gift, I think there's other ways or better tools, I might say, where you could save to be a blessing to a child far better than a whole life insurance policy where you're mixing a death benefit with a savings vehicle that can be expensive and complicated. I'd rather see you do just a straight investment account in your name, but earmarked for the child with some good high-quality growth mutual funds and just let it grow.
You could do a 529 college savings plan. But in terms of the, you know, the insurance, I just don't think that it's necessary. You know, people might say it ensures guaranteed insurability because the child is healthy. But the likelihood they'd be uninsurable as adults is just so low. Number two, because of a legacy gift.
Again, I think there's other ways to do it. Third would be in a tragic case of where a small policy could cover funeral costs. This is really. More about peace of mind than financial necessity. Most people have the resources.
And again, still a very low probability of that happening.
So I would just say at the end of the day, I just don't see it as something that's necessary. Gloria, I appreciate your call today and hope that helps you. We'll head out to Maryland. Robert, thank you for your patience, sir. Go ahead.
I'm considering a reverse mortgage.
Okay. Are they good or bad? Or one of the pitfalls? Of them, yeah, it's a great question, Robert. And, you know, the reverse mortgages of today, what are called home equity conversion mortgages, are much different than the reverse mortgages of the past, which were problematic in some cases.
So, I like this as a tool in your toolbox. Does that mean it's right for everybody? No. If you have a conviction to get out of debt and stay out of debt, entering in this season of life, and you have the income sources and can rely on other assets, great. But if you find yourself either needing access to funds periodically for certain things, home renovations or repairs or other big ticket items, or you just don't have the income to maintain the lifestyle that you would like to, and you're sitting on, among other assets, a lot of home equity.
This is a way to boost your retirement income or at the very least eliminate an existing mortgage. You remember, you know, 50% of retirees about five years ago were heading into retirement. Retirement debt-free.
Now it's only about a third. And so a lot of retirees still have mortgages they're paying on.
Well, paying it off with a reverse mortgage can, at the very least, just eliminate that largest expense in your budget, which could be the key to helping you balance it, even if you don't have the additional equity paid out as a monthly income stream over the balance of your life. You know, the benefits are you can have the income stream. There is no risk of the payout or the mortgage balance growing to greater than the home value, because if that ever happened, the FHA would step in and make up the difference. Thirdly, you know, when you pass away or move, whichever comes first, you know, either your heirs would have to sell it and pay off the mortgage and then they keep the balance or refinance it if they wanted to hang on to the property.
So you just have to recognize, you know, that's in play. You know, what are the downsides?
Well, I guess the only really downside is that you You would have a balance that's growing equal to the interest rate that's attached to it because you're typically not paying anything on it because you don't have to, and the fees that are added to it every year. But other than that, I think it can be a very effective tool to kind of smooth out and allow you to enjoy these retirement years if you are short the amount of income you need to balance the budget. But give me any follow-up questions you have on that.
Well, you pretty much answered them some of the questions that I was going to ask, but the yearly fee, generally, how much is that yearly for I guess a maintenance fee or whatever? Yeah.
You know, the fees for reverse mortgages, I mean, typically it's the, you know, the upfront premium is 2% for that federal backing from FHA. And so, you know, that's right up front. And then you have some mortgage insurance premium of about a half a percent and some other, you know, fees along the way.
So you'd want to just kind of read the fine print and understand what that is. But mainly it's the, you know, closing costs and the FHA insurance charges, you know, which is an origination fee. And that would be just added to the balance that you have there. And then it's pretty modest from that point forward. Is there a company or Some entity that you would recommend?
Yeah, here's what I can do, Robert, is have you we'll put you on hold and I'll I'll get some information to you from somebody that can just educate you on this. And if you decided it was something you wanted, would give you an option of a trusted solution that is biblically oriented, okay?
Well, yes, that would be great. You hit the nail right on the head. I'd like to have some extra income. Not. terribly in debt, but it would be nice to have some additional cash to live more easily, if you will.
Yeah, very good. And I guess one last question. What happens when both when I think you hit the nail on the head, when both of you die, then the heirs can pick up the m the mortgage one way or another if they so wish, uh, or otherwise Uh just let it go, right? That's right.
So, what would happen is the reverse mortgage would need to be paid. It's not assumable. And so, either they would, you know, typically the heirs don't want to keep the home just because they have their own house and you know, they'd rather redeploy that money out in another way.
So, they would sell it. The proceeds would then be used to pay the reverse mortgage balance, and whatever's left would be distributed according to your will or your trust, whatever it is. Beyond that, if they did want to keep it, they would just need to refinance it and either pay off the mortgage out of other assets or get a conventional mortgage that pays off the reverse, and then they would have to pay on that over time. All right, sir. You've been most helpful.
Good. Yeah, stay on the line, and our team will get your information. We'll send you a book just as our gift to you called Understanding Reverse that I think will be a great read for you. And then we'll also get somebody in touch with you.
So just stay right there and we will get your information. Folks, so grateful to have you along with us today on the broadcast. We'll be back tomorrow, Lord willing, to do it all over again. Our goal: help you see God as your ultimate treasure and live as a wise and faithful steward. Big thanks to our team today, Pat, Devin, Jim, and everybody here at FaithFi.
Have a great day. We'll see you tomorrow. Bye-bye. Faith in Finance is provided by Faith By and listeners like you.
