Taking Care of Caregivers, Part 2

And some of y'all need to learn the importance of the sharpen the saw concept. Now, sharpening the saw requires two things, self-care as well as receiving care from other people.

I'll put that in your notes. Sharpening the saw requires self-care as well as receiving care from other people. Are you a giver by nature? Do you have a God-given gift to serve others?

If you want to keep pouring out, sooner or later you have to have something poured in. Hello and thanks for being here for today's Destin for Victory with Pastor Paul Shepherd, Senior Pastor of Destiny Christian Fellowship in Fremont, California. And coming up next, a welcome reminder to all of you who spend so much time giving that you seldom have time for taking.

Maybe today is the day to re-energize, to get a little help to sharpen your saw. Stay with us now or visit pastorpaul.net where you can listen in your recent Destin for Victory message on demand. That's pastorpaul.net. Now, from the life of Elisha, here's Pastor Paul with today's Destin for Victory message, Taking Care of Caregivers.

One of my favorite authors, Stephen Covey, the classic book's title was The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. And Stephen expressed some really important truths throughout that book. I remember getting it in 1989, which is the year I moved to California, and that was the year it came out. And it immediately blessed me. Here I was, a young preacher. I was young back then.

I was 31. And I came with all this vision and ideas and excitement and all that. And reading that book just inspired me all the more. And he talked about how to be a highly effective person. And it talks about seven key habits that highly effective people develop.

The seventh habit is what drew my attention as I thought about this part of the series. The seventh habit, he worded sharpen the saw. Sharpen the saw. Jot that down.

That's an important concept. Sharpen the saw. Now let me paraphrase the illustration he gives at the beginning of the chapter where he talks about the seventh habit. I'm paraphrasing the illustration. You're in the woods, and you come upon an exhausted man working feverishly to saw down a tree.

Picture this. You ask the man how long he's been at it. He replies, over five hours. You suggest that he take a break. He's worn out. Gather himself. Gather some strength. And you suggest that he sharpens his saw.

The man replies, I'm too busy to do that. And that's how Stephen opened that section, and of course he gives many wonderful points as he teaches this value, this habit that should be developed. And there are a lot of us, a lot of you all listen to me right now, either here in the sanctuary or online, and you too have a dull saw. You got lots you're trying to do, but your saw is jacked up.

And you're pushing and pushing and sawing and sawing and working and working and frustrated and tired. And you need to learn the lesson of keeping your saw sharp. Sharpening the saw is part of what's necessary for those of us who are caregivers for other people. If you're a parent of dependents, you are a caregiver for other people. On many of our jobs, we're caregivers. Many of you all care for relatives outside of your immediate family. You care for uncles and aunts and you care for elderly parents and you care for people in need and your extended family. And you take care of a lot of folks. A lot of us are caregivers whether or not you do it by vocation. Some of you are by vocation caregivers. But whether you are or not, most of us, especially people of faith who have learned that you can't just have faith to yourself, you got to bless other people, we do a lot of caregiving and it's a regular part of who we are. And as I said last time, some of us do it so much we don't stop and think about how much we give out. We just, giving out is just what you do.

You wake up and start giving out. And so I need to talk to you and tell you based on this simple part of Elisha's story that while he was coming back and forth into Shunem, ministering the people, prophesying over folk, doing everything they had to do, give folk a word of the Lord, help people in need, whatever God had him do, a prophet didn't have a job description, he just did what the Lord said to do. And as he lived his life and this Shunemite woman saw him coming back and forth, she said, you know what, that man is just wearing himself out and when he comes to town, he doesn't even have anywhere to stay. And she was well to do, I talked about that last time, when the Bible says a woman's well to do, it's very significant, doesn't mean she married money, said, cuz married money. And so she's had the money, but she's respectful of her husband, she didn't tell him, I'm building a room. You know, wise women are that way. You know, your husband probably doesn't know it, we know you run things, but at least let him feel like he got something. At least let him feel like he part of it.

Some of y'all don't have that wisdom, let me drop that on you too. You know, we know you know what you're gonna do, you had your mind made up, and she knew she gonna build him and she had the money, but she said, honey, why don't we build him a room so when he comes to town, she explained, he's a holy man of God, we both trust him and all that, and so let's give him his own little suite. And that meant building, in Bible days, that meant building an extension by building up on the roof. And he had his own penthouse suite. I'm just bringing it up to modern time, in their house. And her husband, you know, he said, yeah, yeah, baby, yeah, that's good, yeah. He think he did something. That's good, that's good, let us feel like we part of it, sisters.

We know y'all know what you're gonna do, but pretend like you are partnering with us in it. When you read the Bible, you just get it. Eve was here, when God created Eve, Adam was asleep. Put him to sleep, so he could create Eve. He woke up and met his wife. And she had been awake, and he was asleep.

She already knew where they were gonna live. Anyway, let me get back to his message. So based on the fact that she said, let's take care of this man who takes care of other people. And some of y'all need to learn the importance of the sharpen the soul concept. Now, sharpening the soul requires two things, self-care, as well as receiving care from other people. Put that in your notes. Sharpening the soul requires self-care as well as receiving care from other people.

That's what I wanna talk about in the remaining half hour or so, and then I'll be done with this part of the series. I need to talk to you about your commitment to do two things, to practice self-care and your commitment to receive care from the people God will raise up, like he raised up this woman for the prophet Elisha. God will raise up people who wanna bless you, but you gotta be open to receive. And a lot of people who spend their lives caring for other folks are great givers and poor receivers. You're good, you are great. You get an A plus at giving.

But some of y'all get a D if not a flat out F at receiving the help God wants to send your way. Pastor Paul Shepherd will be right back with the second half of today's Destined for Victory message, taking care of caregivers. Remember, you can listen to this broadcast on demand at pastorpaul.net. That's pastorpaul.net, and there you'll find a host of great resources at our online store.

You can also listen on your mobile device by downloading our free Destined for Victory mobile app. Search Destined for Victory in the app store and listen to Pastor Paul right in the palm of your hand. Now stay with us after today's message when Pastor Paul joins me from his studio in California, but first let's get back to the rest of the message, taking care of caregivers. Once again, here's Pastor Paul Shepherd.

So let's just talk about you. Do you have goals you want to reach? Tasks you need to accomplish? Assignments you're preoccupied with completing?

Desires you are longing to fulfill and realize dreams that you can't wait to see come to pass? If you have any of that, I'm here to tell you, you need to prioritize staying sharp. You got to stay sharp if you're going to do all that.

Oh, I got so much I want to do. Okay, then you got to stay sharp, because you're not sowing down all the trees in your life with a dull saw. And some of you all, bless your heart, I love you, but you're dull. Pastor loves you enough to tell you the truth, I'm looking at you in your face and saying, you're dull. You're dull online, you're dull. Y'all help me here in the sanctuary. Turn to somebody, look at them and say, you're dull. All right, thank you. See, that mean I don't, only one told you, somebody else just told you. Some of us are trying to do good things, praise God, because God has put good things in our hearts.

We looked at that earlier in the series. Matthew 12, Jesus said, God puts good things and a good man out of what God puts in their heart brings forth good things. You got good things you want to do, praise God, but you can't do it if you're dull.

You got to sharpen that saw, so that you're not working harder, you're working smarter. So, I need you to really get this, some of you all are stressed, you're frustrated, you're disillusioned. You ever been trying to do a good thing and it's not working out the way you want it and after a while you just get all frustrated and messed up. You had a good thing in mind, something's wrong and you couldn't figure it out. Well, I'm coming to give you the answer. What's wrong is you're not prioritizing the right things. You got to be your best in order to do your best.

You can't do your best and you're raggedy, falling apart. So, let's look at it. Look at Luke 10, verse 38 here in NIV. As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he went to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. Now, these people lived in Bethany, it was about a mile and a half or so from Jerusalem. And he stops by there with his disciples because he has been establishing a relationship with this family. One of the ways you're going to stay sharp while I talk, I'm coming to it, is you got to build the right relationships with folk who have a sharpener.

I'll get there. So, we're just looking at this example from Jesus. Verse 39 of Luke 10. She had a sister, Martha had a sister called Mary who sat at the Lord's feet listening to what he said. So, get this, Jesus and his disciples came to the house and Mary sees this as Jesus.

Wow, he's at my house. And so, she parks on the floor and just wants him to talk. And Martha, verse 40, is distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. Pause right there. Some of y'all declare stuff in your life as having to happen. And the fact is, it doesn't have to happen. You might want it to happen.

It's a good thing. But just get the essentials separated from the other desires. At a certain point, you got to prioritize the essentials because that's the have to.

And out of the strength that doing your have tos you receive, you can then do some of your want tos. So, Martha feels like Jesus and his disciples are here. I have to cook the bomb meal. And she's distracted by all the preparations she had to make. She came to him, look at this frustration that some of y'all can personally relate to. She come to him all frustrated. Lord, don't you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself?

Tell her to help me. I know you don't want to, but come on, somebody just go on and practice low honesty. How many of you know what it felt like? She felt like that day in some area of your life, you got so distracted by everything you had to do that you took your frustrations out on other people. Let me see some honest hand.

Oh, thank you for that honesty. Anybody who had their hand down, pray for them, they tripping. We know what that's like to get so worked up over something that is good, but time you get worked up over it, you got an attitude.

Tell my old lazy sister, get up and help me. And I love this. Jesus said, look at verse 41, Martha, Martha, calm down, baby.

That's the inference. He said, you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed. I told you essentials are different from desires. He said, you got a lot in the wrong category. You're worried about stuff that's not essential.

It's nice if you got the strength and the wherewithal to do it. He said, but there are a few things that are needed. And then he said, or indeed only one in this context. He said, Mary has chosen what is better. She's not lazy. She's made a choice. How often do you get to sit and talk with the son of God?

How often do you get to sit at the feet of Jesus and just let him talk and you listen. She's not lazy. She's feeding herself. And Jesus said, she's chosen what is better and it will not be taken from her. No, I'm not going to make her move. I'm not going to rob her of essential to join you in frustrated desire.

Some us need to learn that. Where you are in your life right now, you are frustrated. Whether it's your kids, your spouse, your job, somebody in your life or bunches of things in your life, you're worried about many things. I got to do this and I got to do that and I got to do that. You don't have to do anything but die.

That's all you got to do. One of these days you're going to check out of here. And to be ready when you go, you better be feeding yourself. And so one thing he said in this context is that she chose that. I'm not going to tell her to come help you.

Now, now let's be practical. Jesus didn't say, stop cooking. He did not.

There's no way in there. He didn't say stop cooking. He glad that she cooking. He just want her to chill out.

Why don't you put the thing on simmer? You come in here, just take a little break and come in here and sit with us. We can all talk. We can all fellowship.

Oh, Jesus wasn't crazy. Like that girl cooking, I want some food. But he's trying to straighten out her priorities.

That's what you and I need. Get our priorities straight and keep them straight. A lot of folks think self-care is selfish. No, self-care is essential.

So I can keep giving care to other people. Y'all have been on planes. What they going to tell you on the plane when they're giving you the emergency information, they say, if oxygen is needed, they will drop from above.

And then what do they tell you to do? Put yours on. I ain't going to let my baby die. It's not about your baby dying.

It's about you having enough oxygen to give to your baby. Take care of you first. If you're dead, how they going to live? So we got to get, especially church folk, we holy folk.

We got to get it straight. It's not selfish. You're not carnal cause you're looking out for yourself.

Going to the spa is not carnal. How you going to love God and be sitting up here being rubbed on? Let me see some holy ghost folk who know I can love God and let them take care of me. Let them pamper me. Some of you sisters, I love God while I'm getting mannies and pennies y'all call them.

First time I heard that years ago, I said, what the devil is a manny and a penny? Just as saved, sanctified, filled with the Holy Ghost. Some of y'all pride just by speaking in tongues, letting them just bless you. Thanks so much for being here for today's Destined for Victory message, taking care of caregivers. Right now I'm pleased to welcome in Pastor Paul once again, who joins me from his studio to talk about a great resource, which goes hand in hand with the message you heard today.

Pastor, thank you for these moments together. I'm intrigued by the title of this book that we're offering, Caregivers Need Care Too. Tell us more about it and why you believe it will be so helpful to anyone who's listening. You know, when I was preparing a sermon series based on the life and ministry of Elisha, I was struck this time by the fact that such a powerfully anointed prophet as Elisha needed others to take care of practical needs in his life.

And it dawned on me that I shouldn't just preach about the miracles God wrought through this man's ministry. I needed to also stop and talk about and examine and unpack the fact that care givers need care themselves. So many of us with what we do in our lives, whether it's a parent, whether it's being a spouse, whether it's being a family member, assisting a relative in need. And we need to know that there are things that we can learn. One is how to recognize we are not a resource that can care for ourselves very well. So God sends along people who will help us. And what we have to do is open our hearts, open our minds and let other people be a blessing to us. I don't know, Wayne, if you're like that, but I tend to want to take care of everybody because I'm gifted to do it. But often I feel my neediness and I'm not sure I'm as good as I should be at letting other people fill those needs. So this part of the series, I hope that just as it spoke to me, I hope it will speak to others and help them understand the importance of caregiving.

So when we wrote the booklet, it was a no brainer. We've got to share what was given in the sermon in book form so that people can take it away and more importantly, apply it to their lives. It's true, Pastor, we all need help from time to time. Even those who devote plenty of time caring for others need care themselves. Again, the book that is called Caregivers Need Care Too, and it is our gift to you by request for your generous donation to Destined for Victory this month. Call 855-339-5500 or visit pastorpaul.net to make a safe and secure donation online.

You can also mail your gift to Destined for Victory, post office box 1767, Fremont, California 94538. Solomon who was the wisest man other than Christ, who walked the earth. And Solomon said wisdom takes time and builds on a strong foundation of seven pillars. You got to be wise enough to build and make sure your life is balanced in every area.

What are these seven foundational pillars? Find out next time when Pastor Paul Shepherd continues his message, Taking Care of Caregivers. Until then remember, he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion. In Christ, you are Destined for Victory.