Absurd Truth: What DIDN'T RFK Jr. Do?!

Dana Lashes of Sir Truth Podcast sponsored by Kel-Tec. It's his life mission to make bad decisions. It's time for Florida Man. Florida Man's brilliant plan to hide in the ceiling was ruined by his phone ringing. It's in Polk County. Let's see, Polk County sheriffs, they were looking for this guy who broke into this building. The individual had been evading capture. Due to his he had outstanding warrants and he hid in the ceiling of his workplace. And apparently, while they were looking for him, that's when his cell phone rang. And they were able to apprehend him and take the individual into custody. This was just earlier this week.

Yeah, that's um, yeah, that's maybe, maybe put it on mute if you're going to be doing crimes, saying you know, like silent mode. Let's see this one. A drunk dude at Disney World punches some cast members and then threatens others with a pole. I love how it was. I love how it's described as two shirtless men. So this was an Epcot in Orlando, two shirtless dudes assaulted, they punched a cast member, and then threatened other guests with a pole that one of them ripped out of the ground.

Goodness, it's like some what is it drunk strength? The I just feel like if you're fighting with someone, and you don't have a shirt on, you're probably guilty of starting all of it. Right? I mean, you're just saying. Yeah. So apparently, one guy punched an older lady cast member, the other ripped a pole out of the ground and started swinging around and yelling it. And one person who was there actually told police they thought it was part of the show. So I mean, it's just a orange county deputies handled it. Yeah. I'm so sad that there's no photos of this. I'd say, you know, guys do us all favor here.

You know, everybody's got a cell phone, right? Be your own citizen journalist, get us video. That's all I'm asking for.

Right. I ran out of time for this one the other day. Guy on a bike who stole a tip jar. That was fundraising for a baby.

It was at a diner. It was a baby fundraiser. And they literally just ran up and stole the donation jar. I mean, biked up, right? peddled up.

Yeah. They said that deputies were asking for their help, people's help trying to find the thief because apparently, I mean, he took $2,000. They were raising money for the kitchen manager who had her baby two months early. And then he rode away with it on his bike. And yeah, and they said that it was crazy because the guy was looking at the sign reading it and seeing what it was for and then he still took it anyway.

So the diner is still collecting money, but they're putting the cash in a safe place and nobody can steal it. That's sad. That's sad. It was like for their babies in neonatal.

Intensive Care neonatal unit. That's just so sad. Let's see this Florida street racer driving 80 miles per hour goes airborne lands in a canal and it's all caught on camera lands where the gators live.

Just want to point that out. He was racing 80 miles per hour residential neighborhood lost control of his car and it was a challenger. How are you going to do your challenger like that? So oh my gosh, and challenger landed he was racing a Mercedes. And they were trying to see who could be dumber faster. So it went right into the canal. There's video of it too.

There was a guy like outside in his yard and then there's a car that comes flying in and the guys running away because he sees it coming into the canal. Golly. Turbo charging your metabolism has never been simpler thanks to the innovative handheld metabolic coach Lumen. This revolutionary device empowers you to optimize your metabolism efficiently and effortlessly. And with Lumen, you can master the strategies to keep your metabolism humming at its best. Now Lumen is a breath-based metabolic tracker. You breathe into the Lumen at the start of your day to get a metabolism snapshot and a personalized nutrition plan. And then the app tells you if you're burning fat or carbs. You can get customized tips for nutrition, workouts, sleep, stress. Lumen helps you to know with real data what your body needs. Now your metabolism is your body's rocket engine. It powers everything that you do. And with Lumen, you can expect easier weight management, balanced energy.

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And thanks to Lumen for sponsoring this episode. I was in New York, up in Hudson Valley. And I was supposed to meet them there at like maybe eight or nine.

I was driving up maybe, you know, really early, like seven. And that woman in a van in front of me hit a bear and killed it. A young bear. So I pulled over and I picked up the bear and put him in the back of my van because I was going to skin the bear. And it was very good condition. And I was going to, and put the meat in my refrigerator.

And you can do that in New York City, you can get a bear tag for a roadkill bear. And so then I we went hawking, and I had the bear in my car. And then we had a really good day. And we went late, we were catching a lot of game.

And the people really loved it. So we stayed late. And instead of going back to my home in Westchester, I had to go right to the city because there was a dinner.

I had Peter Luger's steakhouse. And at the end of the dinner, it went late. And I realized I couldn't go home.

I had to go to the airport. And the bear was in my car. And I didn't want to leave the bear in the car.

Because that would have been bad. So then I thought, you know, at that time, this was the little bit of the redneck and they'd been a series of bicycle accidents in New York. They had just put him in the back of the van.

They put him in the bike lanes. And a couple of people got killed. And it was every day and people had gotten badly injured.

Every day it was in the press. And so I thought, I wasn't drinking, of course, but people were drinking with me who thought this was a good idea. And I said, I had an old bike in my car that somebody asked me to get rid of it. I said, let's go put the bear in Central Park and we'll make it look like he got hit by a bike. Gosh.

So this is why you should never go falconing. Guys, it's a Kennedy saying that he's a redneck. I am spent. I am spent. Welcome back to the program.

Dana Lash with you. Where the hell are we? Second hour.

Are we on Mars? What time? Good night. Back with you here. Dana Lash with you.

Bottom of this second hour. So that was RF. So apparently RFK Jr. A story was I'm trying to get you to understand the chain of events for this.

There was a story somebody found out that he was with a bear in Central Park and they were going to come out with a story about him being with a bear in Central Park. So he decided to get ahead of the story, Kane. Is that how this went? And then he told it like this. And then that's why? Yeah.

Did he go falconing? I have no reason to disbelieve him. This is like a cutscene from the Royal Tenenbaums. You know, and the redneck in me. Oh my gosh, you're a Kennedy. Stop it. Oh my gosh.

What is that? Oh my gosh, I can't. I know some of you like him. I don't care. I'm just laughing at the craziness of this whole situation. So they, it's a weird thing.

I mean, and the story, okay, this is where it gets crazier. So the reporter with the New York Times, who is coming out with a story was his own cousin. It's JFK's daughter's daughter. So Caroline Kennedy's daughter, apparently, because they all work in the press or run for office.

That's all they can do. So I don't know. She said that she had no idea. Her own family was involved in the story. You had no idea that RFK Jr. was your cousin and he was involved in this. Okay, sure.

But how random is it? I mean, if you told me, Dana, I want you to come up with a scenario that involves Roseanne Barr and JFK, falconing, a dead bear cub, the Luger steakhouse. I don't think I could.

I don't think I could do that. That sounded like a Mad Libs thing. They were playing Mad Libs. I don't know how else to say it. So he was going to a, and nobody in the media knows how to talk about falconry outings. What in the blue blood hell is that?

Cane, would you like to pass some Grey Poupon while we go on our falconry outing? But he was like, Oh, I was gonna skin the bear and put the meat in my freezer. Do you really believe that he wanted the meat or did he want a bear rug? I'm just saying, but it's like there's a picture of him with it.

Like he's got a picture and it shows it's this little bear and he's pretending that it's biting him. And is that where the brain worm came from? It's quite possible. But I was thinking like, let's look at the worst possible version of this story.

Is there a worst possible version? I just think it's weird. I'm not making fun of it.

I'm not saying it's worse, bad or good. I just think it is hysterically bizarre. I am endlessly entertained by the story. Cane, it is literally a Mad Libs exercise.

Like, again, like the whole Zoomer thing with TikTok. It's market crash in a dead bear cub, market crash in a dead bear cub, market crash in a dead bear cub. That's a new cycle. I just don't understand like even the worst part of the story. Let's just take everything that RFK Jr said at face value and that's 100% true. So what? I love it how he goes, because the New Yorker was going to break the story apparently. And he put it out going, looking forward to seeing how you spin this one, New Yorker.

And the New Yorker was probably like the... what in the world? You made the story worse than what we reported to this. I mean, do you? I don't care. I mean, this chick, this broad hit a bear with her car.

I mean, you know, how much you can get? I think it's weird that you have to go ask the state, can I have this dead animal? Can I pay a tax and get a tab for this dead animal?

Can I still do that? I mean, it's dead. It was on, you know, I guess maybe they don't want people randomly hitting animals and be like, you know, finders keepers, you know, dibs. I don't know. It's the redneck, you know. I operate on the dibs system.

It's true, though. Dibs! Dibs! Oh, somebody hit a bear. Robert Kennedy emerges from the woods. I'm a redneck.

Dibs! Yeah, there we are. And scene. So, um, yeah, falconry. That's why you shouldn't do it. He, when he was asked about the incident, he literally said, quote, maybe that's where I got my brain worm. I was just joking off air about that. Seriously. You know, when I hear brain worm, I think of that, the Corpse Bride, Tim Burton's the Corpse Bride. And that little worm that has a Spanish accent that comes out. I'm like, why does the worm have a Spanish accent and you don't? It's weird. Okay, anyway. So yeah, dead bear cubs, falconry, drugs, cyclists. This is like a, did not have this on my bingo card at all.

None of this. Glad he didn't choose to just blow up the bear. Our very good friends at Kel-Tec. I love Kel-Tec's story so much. George Kellgren immigrated over here from Sweden.

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That's Kel-TecWeapons.com. Tell them that Dana sent you. And now all of the news you would probably miss.

It's time for Dana's quick five. Well, this is how you get me with a headline ancient hobbit bones. Experts have made an incredible discovery that suggests a hobbit sized human species that once roamed a remote paradise island was even smaller than first thought.

They think that they found the bones on Indonesia's Flores Island about 20 years ago. They call them hobbits because they're like, three, a little over three feet. And they said that they think that the new study that they came out with that they were actually even shorter than the ones who came after them. So they actually think it's sort of like three, 3.3 feet that they were probably 2.4 inches smaller. So they're they were a weensy. They were a twee.

I just I was like hobbits? Yes. A Douglas woman Douglas County woman charged with arson because she was siphoning gas while smoking. A woman in a bakery van who lit a cigarette apparently while using a hose to siphon gas out of a U-Haul vehicle is charged with second degree arson after at least one of possibly two U-Haul vehicles were destroyed by fire. According to court records. Jennifer Holmes, who drives a van with Nana's sweet treats written on the side, was arrested on August 3, at the farmer's co-op.

The police were called to the U-Haul business lot. They said that it was fully engulfed and then they found out that she apparently was siphoning gas from the U-Haul and lighting a cigarette at the same time, which is super smart. That's actually a very smart thing to do. Not. Don't ever do that. Seriously don't.

Let's see here. We got a man who was running naked through downtown Des Moines and hijacking cars right and left. This man was naked. He got done taken to jail. He was in downtown Des Moines, Iowa, running through the streets. But naked, screaming at the ladies. And then he tried to get into a car. Oh, my gosh.

Can I just tell you. Can you imagine you're in your car, getting in your car and a dirty, sweaty, naked man comes running across. Oh, my. I would have thrown up. I would have thrown up out of just the nastiness of it.

He was arrested. But I am sick now. I'm sick and I got a protein drink. I got to finish this disgusting.

And I wanted to read this to you because I think it should it's kind of long for a T-shirt, but it's T-shirt worthy. He writes quote in his he wrote this on X. He said, quote, sorry, pro-life evangelical leaders. When you nominate weaklings like Romney, McCain and Mike Pence, you lose elections. When you act like politics is too dirty for Christians to be involved in, you lose the party.

When you think evangelizing entails inviting your neighbor to megachurch movie night, you lose the culture. The Republican Party is no longer yours. But you weren't pushed out, he writes. You gave it up. You stopped fighting for it. You were too busy building your stupid megachurch kingdom with its 28 satellite locations and inane self-help sermons while the culture and the country fell into disrepair.

There's still time to turn it around, but you have a ton of work to do. And he adds to that you lost the Republican Party long before Trump. They paid lip service to your cause, but they never really cared about it.

And you were satisfied to remain uninvolved and punch the ticket for whichever polite milk toast family man with good hair told you the right things while giving up on every single issue. And he ends with Trump and Trump supporters didn't start this. They just exposed it. Oh, my gosh, that's a sermon. And joining us right now is Joel Berry with the Babylon Bee. God love you for writing that, because I am so glad that you said this. And I say this as someone who lives in a town where we just had a megachurch scandal at the Gateway Church with one of the pastors over there and it became this huge thing. And I'm like and I always hear all the time from so many leaders, like, don't you know, politics is dirty. Don't get involved in it. You know, it's not it's like you're you're not really it's like bad for Christians to get involved.

I'm so glad that you said this. Tell me what your thoughts are of all of this, because I think what you said is what a lot of people are really feeling. Yes, I think evangelicals, for the most part, have themselves to blame for this for the last two decades. We've been told, you know, if you get involved in politics, if you're an outspoken conservative, you're you're worshipping power, you're practicing idolatry, you're living for the kingdom of man rather than the kingdom of God. You know, you hear all this stuff and our leaders have been examples of complete impotence in spite of our high ideals, the things that we believe they haven't done much good for the Republican Party.

They haven't done much good when it comes to preserving our culture and stopping the march of the left. And and so we shouldn't be surprised. I mean, you know, while while we were being lectured from the pulpit about not being too political from our evangelical leaders, people like Harmeet Dillon were kicking down doors, you know, fighting for liberty for our children and our grandchildren. And so, of course, the Republican Party, they're going to go with the people who are actually fighting, who are actually doing something as opposed to the people who are kind of sitting off to the side, just waiting to be catered to like evangelicals have for so long.

Yeah. And you mentioned, you know, while these people were doing this, people like Dillon were going out and fighting the good fight. And even during the COVID lockdown, I mean, our church was one that locked down.

And I mean, we had like, you know, people within our church talk about how it's, you know, it's it's nice to wear your face mask because it makes other people feel comfortable and, you know, keep six feet away. And yes, you know, and try to justify, you know, at a time when the church should have been open and they weren't. And that's when really a lot of people were really motivated to get out.

And that's why we see so many people and there's so much passion right now. But you make such a good point because I do feel like the church kind of accommodated that not all but some. Well, yeah, I mean, they COVID was a great shame for the church. I mean, the fact that the church is shut down for months and months and months when people, the sheep, Christians needed to be fed needed fellowship. It was such a colossal failure. And in a time when, you know, the left is aggressive, the left is getting their policies, you know, passed.

At a time when we need people who are bold, people who are willing to speak the truth in a hostile culture, people who are willing to fight and win. Evangelicals, especially particularly our leaders, not necessarily the rank and file, haven't done anything. You know, a great example, you know, I live in Ohio, we had issue one, which was one of the most horrific pieces of legislation. It legalized abortion up to the moment of birth for any reason, no questions asked in a largely conservative state like Ohio. I was part of the pro-life movement at the time, getting pastors to say anything in the pulpit, you know, to oppose issue one, getting churches to organize to, you know, to help with voter drives or, or attend protests, anything like that. It was like pulling teeth because pastors, well, you know, that's politics, you know, that we're not supposed to be involved in that we might lose our tax exemption. There's this great fear in evangelical churches about doing any of that. Not so with the left. You go to a Democrat church, you go to, you know, you know, a black church. They are preaching politics every Sunday from the pulpit, they're getting souls to the polls, they are organizing and we're just not doing that. And so I think the Republican Party, they started to look for, okay, we need we need people who are willing to fight and evangelicals just don't seem to have the fight in them anymore. I think that's a huge point.

We're talking with our good friend, Joel Berry. And I think you're making a point that a lot of people are really scared to make because nobody wants to look like they're critical. They're being too harsh and criticizing the church or criticizing their faith or criticizing their elders or anything like that.

I get that totally. But then at the same time, there are a lot of people asking, well, where's that representation in the RNC, you know, the language about traditional marriage and the language, you know, on abortion. And that's I mean, it seems to be like, you know, and it is kind of a pretty moderate, you know, right down the middle position on all of that stuff for this platform. It's not anything like we've seen prior to Republican RNC platforms. And it's you said it's because, you know, evangelicals really remove themselves from that fight. I, I don't really see a lot of that activism as much on the right that I as I used to see when I was younger. Yeah, well, I think the good news, though, is that I think the younger generation has mostly rejected that kind of that we need evangelicalism of, you know, the last 20 years. I think the bold Christianity and outspoken Christianity is back. It is sad to kind of see it being taken out of the official Republican platform. But I think that it's I think it is coming back in a big way. And I think our voices are going to be much louder. And I think we're in the next 10 years, you're going to see Christians being a lot more effective to get some of these political wins. Talk to me about this for a minute about the idea of that it's you're being a bad Christian, if you're involved in political outreach, because that if it's not said, it's definitely intimated in a lot of churches.

And I have so many, so many of our friends in our church. It's like, it's like the dirty thing. Like we, you know, people know that I work in politics. It's like a dirty thing that we just don't talk about.

It's just very odd. What are your thoughts on that? How do we overcome that?

Well, I think part of it is a little bit of an embarrassment reflex. You know, we, you know, the 90s and the 80s, we had the moral majority and the Jerry Falwells. And there's this kind of like, well, we don't want to be those icky, you know, right wing Christians.

And so a lot of evangelical leaders have kind of taken upon this mantle as being like PR reps for Christianity. We have to be cool. We have to be kind of, you know, pleasing and winsome. And we got to invite people and we can't be like those hard nosed Republicans. We can't be like the Rush Limbaugh types.

And so they kind of just pushed all that aside. And there has been, there's a lot of kind of like passive aggressive, like shaming of any outspoken conservatives, outspoken Christians who are involved in politics. And, you know, as a result, you're seeing, you know, school boards in largely Christian areas are being populated completely by leftists, you know, city council, local elections. I mean, we've completely given this up to the left. You know, the evangelical voters are the most reliable pro-life, pro-family voting block.

I mean, if churches were to mobilize, we could make sure that a Republican never lost an election again. But I think there's just been this overwhelming fear from our leadership, you know, to look bad. They don't want to look uncool.

They don't want to look square. And it's like a business approach, too. I mean, I understand that you're out there trying to win souls over, but sometimes it may be, and correct me if I'm wrong on this, sometimes for me, it seems like, you know, you have some leaders out there that are more interested in adding more, you know, seats to the corporatized megachurch than actually going out and winning the souls.

Yeah, they're entrepreneurs now. They're trying to get more butts in seats, and they have won people to their buildings with, you know, slick programs and cool music and really kind of watered-down sermons that don't really have a lot of depth to them. And they're at the point now where they have these, you know, 20,000-person churches, a third of which are on the left politically, and they know that if they speak out, they're going to lose all these people.

What do we do? And so I think a lot of it is absolutely it's money, money motivated. Because it's not like people are speaking out on, you know, like, just trying to think of, you know, like taxes or something like, I mean, you're talking about life.

And you're talking about, you know, the building blocks of a functioning society, which is a family that parents, a man and a woman start and, you know, all of that stuff. I mean, these, they're not controversial things. I mean, it's very biblical, but they're very nervous to talk about any of this stuff.

And which is weird, because the stereotype from the left is that they're not, but in reality, they are. Yeah, yeah. Well, you know, the thing I always tell people is that Christians are meant to be salt and light, you know, our presence in the world should make the world look different. We're not meant to just kind of sit in our churches and our ivory towers, and we just kind of like listen to our sermons, and that's it. We're supposed to go out and it's supposed to make a radical difference in our communities and our states and our countries. And so I hope that the tide is turning in Christianity in America. I hope that we're kind of turning back that fear that we've had for so long. Because we are, we're going to lose our republic, we're going to lose our freedoms if evangelicals don't start mobilizing.

Yeah, that's a good point. One last thing you add, you want God back in the party, me too, that requires you to emerge from your pristine ivory towers and take your Christian faith into the ugly, messy world of political action. You add, feel free to join us, but I won't hold my breath. You don't sound very optimistic there, Jordan. I'm naturally a pessimist. That way I'm always surprised that something good happens.

Right, right, right. I hope it does turn out well. I hope it does. And what do you, I mean, do you think that that's going to, what do you, what would you like to see?

I actually, this will be my last question to you. What would you like to see with regard to this issue in the RNC? Because I understand the people's, I understand people's, and I completely agree with you 100% on this. I understand the concern that individuals have, but like you, I'm like, well, where were you out here fighting for this?

Or why were you so quiet on this issue? And it's always like the same groups forever that have always held the line on issues of like life or marriage or things like that. And some of the people that I see speaking out the loudest about this now, I've noticed we're pretty silent during some of these battles before. Yeah, I think really the only thing that's going to turn this around in a substantive way is going to be, it's going to take radical spiritual revival from the ground up. I think all of us need to repent. Our leaders, we need repentance. We need repentance. We need to get back to the basics of what scripture says, preaching the plain truth of scripture, speaking the plain truth of scripture to this post-truth culture and living it out. And I think once we do that, I think you'll start to see this groundswell of change. It's going to look weird and mysterious, and we're not going to be able to necessarily put our finger on it. But I think it has to start in the churches with repentance and revival in our hearts and getting back the basis.

I agree with you. I keep hearing people say, oh, we're navigating a post-Christian world. I don't know if I'm ready to adopt that line of thinking yet. Post-Christian world. Me neither.

Yeah, I'm not ready to accept that. Joel Berry with the Babylon Bee, God bless you, my friend. I appreciate you joining me today. Thank you. Thanks for having me. Of course. Thanks for tuning in to today's edition of Dana Lash's Absurd Truth Podcast. If you haven't already, make sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.