Absurd Truth: Another Pitch To The Boys

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It's time for Florida Man. This is not real. This story. And the guy, the guy, the picture of this guy.

Okay. Smoking gun. Smoking gun. After fondling a ferret, suspect stole a weasel.

Police are searching for the Florida Man who stuffed a $650 ferret into his shorts and smuggled the weasel out of a Petland store. Security cameras capture, I swear if you don't show this photo, they capture this guy. His mustache and his hairline are the same. Look at it. It's like a Lego. His mustache is a mouth helmet.

Yeah, I mean, the mustache is just a little version of what the hair is doing. Security cameras captured this guy as he browsed the ferret section of his store. And according to the police report, he fondled the ferret for quite some time. And then he shoved it into his shorts and left. They saw him like trying to hold the, oh my gosh, the Petland manager gave chase, but was able to get him. They're trying to find him. I feel bad for the ferret. Like what happened? So what do you think he's going to do with the ferret?

I'm really worried about the ferret. They chose the word fondle. Yeah. Like that's weird. I mean, I immediately don't trust him because his mustache and hair are the same. A Florida man bribed a cop with $20 after hitting his car in a motel parking lot, handed him the money and said, get yourself a dozen donuts on me. It was in Homestead, Florida.

Adam or Aiden Domingo is the guy who did it. I also, I also think it's just so abundantly clear that the people who say these things don't actually spend time talking to young men. You know this because we know each other in real life, but I spent a lot of time on college campuses and I spent a lot of time with young men. I love young men.

I love frat guys. And in that I've realized like even the ones that identify as conservative are almost always pro-choice. They're almost always pro gay marriage.

You'd be surprised at the number of them who support a Black Lives Matter. And so I feel like people just kind of love them into this box. Yeah, you look like you really know them.

Welcome back to the program, Dana Lash with you at the bottom of this second hour. So you're like, why are you playing this? This is like some, I hate the word influencer. It's just influencer is a fancy word for opinionated loudmouth on digital. That's literally all it is.

Yeah. You can't even get on social media without someone trying to influence you about something in the most blatant way. But anyway, this woman is part of apparently the plan for Democrats to win back men. Her name is Olivia Juliana.

I don't know why I got to have two first names, you know, I want two first names make it sound fancy. But apparently, this person is being the Democrats are going to use her to win over young men. Yeah, I'm sure that's the way it'll do it. That's how they want to they that's how they want to approach this. It's called the Sam project Rolling Stone. We talked a little bit about this yesterday. Rolling Stone is a piece out about it.

I know I had to read it. They have the speaking with American men a strategic plan. It's called the Sam plan speaking with American men as am. And that's that $20 million effort to try to figure out why dudes are dudes. They're going to I told you this, the sentence was to study the syntax, language and content that gains attention and virality. So why do certain things go viral digitally? Why are these guys viral? They're trying to figure out Joe Rogan.

There can be real. As someone who works in broadcasting, and I've worked in broadcasting for a very long time, I have a very strong sense of I am very picky with I don't really listen to a lot of other I don't really listen to any other. I don't listen to any other political commentary. Because when you do it all day, and you live it all day, the last thing that you want to do during your time not doing it is to listen to someone else.

Now I am all about reading things that because I like to challenge what opinions that I have so I can more I can fine tune them and figure out how to better articulate and defend them. So it's not that issue. I'm just, you know, there's certain people I'm just like, Oh, my gosh, and most of them say the same damn thing.

They all say the same thing. And a lot of things that are in television. It's weird, because some things are very male dominated and some things are not. Like daytime TV is very, very female dominated. Women do better during the day and in the mornings.

I mean, there's been a lot of studies on this. And I think especially there's just this huge absence of or was a huge absence as digital grew of content that was geared specifically towards dudes like dude stuff, not how the matriarchy wants dudes to consume things or not what the matriarchy wants dudes to consume. But like dude stuff like cars and guns and supplements and protein and dude topics and aliens and all that other stuff, right?

And I think that's all fine. Democrats cannot figure out why that's so successful with guys. And as a woman who's in broadcasting, I like it because it's so different from everything else that's out there.

Right? I mean, I don't want to hear chicks sit here and talk about toxic masculinity or whatever and do the view all day. I just find that other stuff interesting because it's so different. So my point is that the left cannot figure out why that kind of content, why even gaming content and everything else is so popular. And I know why they can't figure it out because it's authentic. And the left is not authentic. The left has not been, I don't know when the last time, Kennedy maybe? I don't know when the last time the left has been authentic.

It's been a really long time. And so they have this SAM plan. And they did this huge thing with Rolling Stone and they talked about how they had the same fundraising pitch during the Democrat primary. And Rolling Stone wanted to find out who's actually running the same project and how to stop losing the culture war and win back men. And of course, it's a pro-choice America president and a guy that was an advisor to Biden's campaign. I mean, yeah, it sounds like really dude-ish.

I don't think it's going to be successful just because of that right there. The reason that Democrats have a male voter problem is because they've denigrated men for the better part of 20 years. The reason Democrats have a male voter problem is because they've offshored manufacturing jobs. They've downplayed trades. They've downplayed practical skills. They've basically accused men of all being like rapists. And I mean, the Believe All Women and all this stuff. Look what they did with Brett Kavanaugh.

I mean, what did I tell you? The whole Kavanaugh thing, there was going to be a major generational consequence as a result of that. And you're seeing some of that come to fruition. And Democrats think that they can change it just by pretending to talk about video games or something.

And that's not accurate. Look, just the stuff that I've witnessed, and I'm a casual gamer. Yes, I got my kids started by helping them with difficult levels in Mario Brothers.

And now the Padawans have become the masters. And I mean, clearly, there are other people that have really serious setups. They only do PCs.

I have Xbox. I mean, come on. But I enjoy it. It's fun. And it's a release from all of the other everyday stuff. And you're really involved so you don't have time to really wrap your mind around anything else, except that mission that you're on and that objective that you're on right in that moment. And there's a lot of strategy involved.

And I like it because of those things. But one of the things that I've seen is that people that are in these communities immediately can sniff out inauthenticity a mile away. They know if you're a poser or not.

I don't know why Democrats think that throwing $20 million at this is going to gain them some ground. If anything, it's going to further disassociate themselves away from these communities because dudes don't respond to that. Like women will tolerate a certain level of inauthenticity as a very Machiavellian tactic. Dudes do not. They just don't. Dudes are very much above board.

What you see is what you get. Women do everything below board. Dudes don't tolerate that. You're a casual gamer too.

You casually play because they keep going back to gaming and the podcasting and digital. Men will suss out anything that's inauthentic. Yes. And the left looks at that as toxic for some reason.

Yes. And I don't know why it's toxic. And also, why can't guys just have their own spaces?

God love you. As a woman, I want to have my own space, right? Like I want to be able to do my, so I have a couple of interests. I like to play video games and I love all things crochet. And I like food, right? Those are my things. Sometimes I just want to be left alone. Leave me alone. Let me watch a historical documentary and I'm going to crochet. That's all I want to do. That's all.

I'm going to unengage my brain for a little bit. And I just, I want me to, especially if you're a situational extrovert, you got to be able to have that time. Guys need to be able to have their guy time. They need to be able to have their guy stuff and do their guy things. And for years, they've been called toxic for it. That's not healthy. That's like an argument of a codependent to say, why do guys have to have their own spaces?

Why can't we be there too? Why do you have to be codependent? Why are you going to be like that? That's your stage five clinger.

Why do you got to do that? This is how, that's how they lost men. They started losing men 20 to 30 years ago. It wasn't just this last presidential cycle.

I was reading this Rolling Stone piece. And that was the first thing that jumped out at me is they don't understand still fully at what caused that division. When you criticize chivalry or masculinity as being toxic, simply because it doesn't jive with your third wave feminist worldview. That's a problem. That's a you problem. That's not a man problem. That's a you problem. And they think they're going to throw, you know, Kane, we should offer to take their $20 million. We'll fix it.

Wink, wink. We'll fix the problem for you. Sure. I'll do it for $19 million. $19 million. Wow. Kane, that's a bargain.

That is a bargain for your expertise at only $19 million. I agree with that. Our friends at Caltech, the brand new game changing. Well, not brand new, but it's new and you need to get it if you haven't.

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It was their sources who lied and Homeland Security is investigating whether Los Angeles County gave our social security benefits to illegals. I'm Greg Kourambas inviting you to join Jim Garrity of National Review and me each weekday for the three martini lunch podcast. We'll give you the good, bad and crazy news of the day and hopefully a lot of laughs to follow the three martini lunch on Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts. And now all of the news you would probably miss.

It's time for Dana's quick five. Yikes. So in Arkansas, a kindergarten graduation erupted into a wild brawl between parents as children screamed, stop, stop. It's a kindergarten, a kindergarten graduation. WREG, the network down there, TV network down there had the video. You could hear that kids are, I don't even think you can play the audio because there's some cursing in it. But it was the West Memphis's Falk Elementary and the children were screaming in the corridor. They were screaming to stop.

Taller men stood in the middle to separate. It was the women that started throwing that were fighting. And then the men started throwing punches.

The fight was eventually broken up and no injuries were reported. Nobody knows why the fight actually started, but it was a brawl at literally a kindergarten graduation. And I just feel so bad for those kids because that's their parents, their parents that are fighting. They were telling the parents to stop the kids.

The kids are trying to parent the parents. I can't even deal. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh.

This is going to be a nightmare. The Grand Tour. I love the original show with Jeremy Clarkson and Richard Hammond and James May. So now they're doing a younger and digital lineup and they have these two. I mean, the guys that they have, they do a car show.

It's called Throttle House. And I've seen some of that before and it's pretty decent. But that doesn't mean that you can literally host, you know, like your own series. And then they have this other guy who's like a comedian or influencer or whatever on with it.

One of the reasons why this is going to be horrible and it's not going to do anything. No offense to these guys. And that's because they're not Jeremy Clarkson and Richard Hammond and James May. That relationship made that show.

That was the original. You just can't. It's not because people want to watch a great show about cars and travel. They were watching three legitimate friends who were really good at what they did.

Enjoy these hobbies. That's what people tuned in for. You can't replicate that. That's the stupid move by Amazon. China is now the biggest debt collector in the developing world, according to a new report. And that's because of the Belton Road initiative. Absolutely. And they're doing that to shore up their influence and their control. Pennies are going away.

Basically, it's like three cents to make one cent. So spend them or keep them. I don't care. But they're going away. Pennies are going away.

Let's see. And we're going to have a lot of killer heat warning top forecasters. It's about time because it's been cloudy and kind of cool here in Texas.

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Those words stunned me and I immediately called him back. And we're now helping him and his family after a terrible accident. I'm John Morgan of Morgan and Morgan. Everybody who comes to our firm at their time of need is a somebody.

I grew up poor, but my grandmother was like a queen to us. At Morgan and Morgan, our goal is to level the playing field for you and your family at your time of need. The insurance company has unlimited money and resources. You need a firm who can fight them toe to toe. For right at 30 years, we have fought them in courtrooms throughout America. Our results speak for themselves.

And always remember this. Everybody is a somebody and nobody is a nobody. Visit for the people.com to learn about our firm. Morgan and Morgan, for the people injured.

Visit for the people.com for an office near you. I don't know what's happening with Hawaii. Have you heard about these? There was a big story last summer pertaining to Spain and tourism, where certain people in Spanish towns were railing against tourists. And some of the other people were like, that's literally our whole economy.

Why would you do that? So in Hawaii, get this. So this is from ABC 7. If you're going to Hawaii, you will be paying more to do so because Hawaii is placing a new tax on tourists to fund climate change projects. It is the first of its kind in the nation. Why are these beautiful areas so lefty and stupid?

How does I mean, Hawaii is one of the most beautiful places I've ever been. Why? Why would you so their governor signed it? They signed it Tuesday of this week.

It's a tax on hotel room and vacation rental stays. And they want to raise money to address the eroding shorelines, wildfires and consequences of climate change. The wildfire situation in Hawaii. Did the government ever respond to that? Just curious.

No, not really. I think they said something like 700 bucks and then they were out. They're like, hey, here's 700 bucks. We're out. Yeah.

I think they said something like 500 bucks. They weren't so concerned about the shoreline when Barack Obama bought. What was that? Not MacGyver.

What was the guy's name? Magnum PI. So Barack Obama, the property that his family bought in Hawaii is the Magnum PI house. And it's on this like stretch of very particular shoreline in Hawaii. It's in Honolulu County.

I think it's in Honolulu County, but they apparently, the allegation is that they paid off people in Hawaii to do some construction on that shoreline for their own property that actually damaged the shoreline that other people would be fined heavily for doing. And they got around it. And there was a lot of discussion about that. A lot of discussion. And it was, I think, I don't even know how an 18 million dollar, it was an 18 million dollar property.

So for instance, this is a story that I had saved, you know, because they're suddenly so concerned about it with tourists. They had, but the Obamas were okay. There were people that live in Oahu that did the exact same thing that the Obamas did with their shoreline, but they each got fined a million dollars for the violation.

And the Obamas did not. Must be that privilege. I'm telling you, special exemption. So I'm just, you know, I mean, they, there's a lot there. I'm just saying so, but the tourists, they're going after tourists. Now, this is a state that relies heavily on tourism. I mean, yeah, you got pineapple, you got great coffee, but this is a state that relies heavily on tourism.

And I understand the line of wildfire and everything that happened. That's, I mean, that's city leadership. That's the Hawaii state leadership.

There's a lot there that went into it in addition to a completely inept administration at the time. Now, they're hoping that they're going to get a hundred million dollars a year from this tax. And it just seems like you're in some ways punishing tourists. So you're basically getting extra taxes on your hotel room rates. They also have an 11% tax on cruise ship bills. They, and if you go to Hawaii, you already pay a pretty hefty room tax. That's, I think it's like over 10% that you pay as a tourist on your room tax.

And I get it. I mean, that's one of the reasons why they have tourism. You know, you're going to get generate some stuff or you're going to generate some revenue that way. But it's going to specifically focus on tourism.

And that's going to specifically for quote unquote climate change. It's going to climb higher. That along with state and county taxes, it's going to, it's going to more than double. It's going to be like 20%, a 20% levy on your accommodations.

It will be the highest in the nation. Now, most of the hotels kind of supported it, kind of. I mean, are they going to not? They kind of have to. And they said that they're trying to look at the greater good for tourism.

And I don't know. If anything else, am I just, am I looking at this to myopic of a way? Because I'm just thinking, if this was like reverse and this was a Republican state, Democrats would be saying that you're pricing the poor out of enjoying the beauty of Hawaii. Right?

I mean, for climate change. I mean, maybe they could have all the wealthy people out there that are mostly Democrats that are jacking up the shoreline. Maybe they could actually pay the penalties and not, and maybe they could get some revenue generated from that instead of hitting tourists.

I don't know. It's just weird. I get so tired of hearing about these beautiful places, bitching and moaning about tourism. Well, then move.

Go find, go to another state and find a different state that has a different industry. You know, otherwise just, you know, acclimate yourself to the fact that you are lucky enough, blessed enough to live in such a beautiful area that other people for a fleeting second in our lifespan want to go and observe it and be part of it for a few days. Good grief. Is that too much to bear for your privileged backsides? I get so tired of hearing this, whether it's people in Spain complaining or whether it's a stop it. It's not like, you know, a giant, I would get it if they were Venetians and they were criticizing giant cruise ships that were damaging docks going into the harbor there, but this is different. Thanks for tuning in to today's edition of Dana Lash's Absurd Truth Podcast. If you haven't already made sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.