Refusing to be Pig-Headed People

Paul told the church in Corinth, related to this verb, you can have fellowship with that incestuous man, or you can have fellowship with God. You cannot have both. You can have, my friend, that hidden affair with a woman you work with, or you can have God. You cannot have both. You can swindle, and you can cheat, and you can lie, or you can have God. You cannot have both. Sometimes people think they can hold on to their sin and selfishness and hold on to God at the same time.

That's not the case. Welcome to this broadcast of Wisdom for the Heart with Stephen Davey. In 1 Corinthians 13, Paul wrote to the church in Corinth and described for them and for us what true love looks like. Stephen's working his way through that passage in this current series. Today, we're going to see some things that true love does not do. If you're able to have your Bible open, turn to 1 Corinthians 13 for this lesson called Refusing to be Pig-Headed. Paul is going to tell us how love doesn't act, and he describes a very unattractive behavior. He's nearly crass in his descriptive verbs.

One thing's for sure, he tells it like it is. As I studied them, the description that came to my mind was pig-headed and stubborn. When's the last time you've looked in the mirror and said, you are so pig-headed?

It's pretty good exercise to do every once in a while. What does that mean? Well, as I thought of that phrase, I went to my library and pulled a few volumes down and sure enough found the history of that phrase. This expression, pig-headed, dates back to the Middle Ages and the Southeast Asian country now known as Indonesia. This is a legend of a king who had incredible powers over the forces of nature and life and death. He could, according to legend, enter a meditative state and while in that state actually have his servant take off his head with a sharp sword and then after a while put it back on his shoulders and it would mysteriously rejoin without ever disturbing the king. So whenever the king wanted to show off his powers with dignitaries who were coming from afar, awed by this rather obvious and unique power, he would have his servant lop off his head with a very sharp sword and they would all watch as his head, when replaced on top of his shoulders, mysteriously reattached. The only problem was one particular day with all these guests around and everybody watching this display, his servant cut off his head with a little too much enjoyment, a little too much force and the king's head rolled into a nearby river and was washed away. The servant was frantic, he didn't know what to do. He saw a nearby pig and thought, well, that'll work. So he used the pig's head instead. The king came to and was upset, understandably. He had his servant killed and then moved his royal residence up into a high tower where he lived out the rest of his life. He declared an edict that when anyone was around the tower they were never ever allowed to look up. They had to keep their eyes on the ground, lest they look upward and see the pig-headed king. Paul is about to reveal the unattractive and ugly side of people, a pig-headed people, people convinced of their own superiority. And when you're around them, it's best that you look down, stay quiet and nobody will get hurt. And he uses language that we can all immediately understand.

There are no loopholes here, there are no question marks. Nobody in Corinth or in Kerry can read this text and say, huh? What does he mean by that? In fact, I've chosen to title our study tonight as practically as I can. I'm just going to call it refusing to be pig-headed people.

Even without knowing the history of the phrase, you just know that's not something you want to be. How to refuse to be a pig-headed person might just be the down to earth wording that we won't soon forget. Now in our last session we opened with the two action verbs in this list of 15. Remember these are not adjectives even though it looks like they are in your translation, they are verbs.

So we translated them beginning with verse 4. Love exercises patience. Love demonstrates kindness.

Those are the attractive qualities. Now he begins to rattle off eight negative statements about agape and they are down to earth. In fact, they are in your face.

There's nowhere to hide. The next phrase in chapter 4 is this. Love is not jealous.

You could translate it so that you could get the flavor of a verb. Love does not burn with envy. One author that I was reading said that there are two classes.

This is William Barclay. He said there are two classes of people in the world. Those who are millionaires and those who want to be.

Those who have and those that want to have. Well jealousy or envy as your text might be translated. It comes from the Greek word that means to boil, to be fervent, to be passionate. That's why I translated love does not burn with or boil with envy. The problem is this particular person Paul has in mind is boiling over with what somebody else has and what they have a fervent desire to have as well.

In fact, it's more than that. What makes this particular verb all that more seriously deviant is that it refers to not only wanting something that somebody else has but wanting to have it and them not to have it. Wanting to have what they have so that they can no longer have it. This is jealousy at the deepest most corrupt destructive level. Well Paul says agape is living without competing. This love is demonstrated when someone is glad that another person has something they don't have but would like it to. Which means true love is contentment with what God has given you.

You're happy with it. Someone sent me some time ago this rather humorous tongue in cheek poem that demonstrates the fickleness of rather jealous love. Goes like this. Sam's girl is rich and haughty. My girl is poor as clay. Sam's girl is young and pretty.

Mine looks like a bale of hay. Sam's girl is smart and clever. My girl is dumb but good. Now what I trade my girl for Sam's girl.

You bet your life I would. Would you long to trade with someone you envy. You might envy the health of another Christian or their job or their physical appearance or their spiritual gifts and talents.

You might envy their spouse their children their position their personality. Ultimately the jealous person destroys themselves they fracture their own peace of mind and sense of purpose why because their eyes are not on Christ who is the author and finisher of our faith our eyes are on one another. You know it's interesting to me to recall that it was to the Corinthians the same body of believers that Paul wrote when you compare yourselves with another you are not wise. 1 Corinthians 10 verse 12 and remember here by the way as well ladies and gentlemen Paul is not telling the unbeliever in 1 Corinthians 13 the love without envying he's telling the believer which obviously means it implies then that we as believers can live jealous petty envious bitter clamorous lives.

I told you he would be in our face he would tell it like it is this is not a copy. James did the same when he warned the believer if you have bitter jealousy and selfish strife in your heart do not be arrogant and so lie against the truth in other words admit it don't try to get around it. Then he adds for where jealousy exists there is disorder and every evil thing jealousy is ultimately destructive and ultimately we destroy ourselves the Daniel Vincent writes how much of the pit that is how much of hell is there in the spirit of an envious man the happiness of another is his misery the good of another is his affliction he looks upon the virtue of another with an evil eye he is as sorry at the praise of another as if that praise had been taken from himself. Envy makes him a hater of his neighbor but his own tormentor.

Now can you see the wisdom and the rescuing of his own spirit from this kind of torment when John the Baptist's disciples came to him and they said to him in John chapter 3 master are our followers they are leaving us and they are going over to this Christ. And John the Baptist said you remember effectively we could only hope as much for he must increase and I must what decrease true love does not burn with jealousy over something someone has or is true love is love without competing goes further in verse 4 with the phrase love does not brag you could understand Paul to be saying love does not go around shining a spotlight on oneself true love does not live to brag the one who loves with a guy pay is not the subject of his own conversation. The one who is is merely proving he is in love with whom himself by the way this word is used nowhere else in the New Testament in this form than here it refers to one who literally simply talks a lot about himself. You think that Paul you know he's describing he's speaking of this this grand agape that he wouldn't talk about some like that that just seems so commonplace so ordinary so obvious but yet he's he's put it right down here where we can grab it a person who is full of himself is not full of a guy pay is what he's saying.

One author added this insight jealousy is wanting what someone else has bragging is trying to make others jealous of what we have jealousy puts others down bragging builds us up. This was the trumpet blowing of the Pharisees they wouldn't do anything they would do anything unless it was going to be published along with their photo in the Jerusalem Gazette. And they never ran out of material because they were full of themselves they were in love with their own image they were show offs they were boasters they arranged so that the morning and afternoon and evening prayers would find them at some public intersection where everyone would stop and pray but they would be able to be seen from all four directions just timed it that way. When they fasted they put ash on their face and they moped around to prove that they were in indeed godly they were full of themselves they could not be full of a guy pay there isn't room in your heart for both the truth is the braggart doesn't recognize or realize that he's actually advertising his own emptiness the shallowness of his spirit and ultimately his own pride. Isn't it interesting that we can spot it in somebody else just like that. But we don't see it in ourselves. When Paul wrote this text to the Corinthians they were involved in spiritual show off contests they were attempting to best each other with the most sensational public gifts they were after the prestigious offices and they all wanted to have the microphone whenever they meant for worship they were trying to sort of outdo one another and and one up each other in the assembly and the result was carnality the result was utter chaos earlier in chapter four this letter to the Corinthians Paul rebuked they're bragging when he wrote listen what do you have listen to Paul's wonderful logic as he tries to help them what do you have that you did not receive and if you did receive it why do you boast as if you had not received it same word here in other words if whatever we have and are are the gifts of God's grace shouldn't we all gather around this campus every time we're around each other and brag about the grace of God since we have nothing but what we've received from the Lord no wonder the apostle Paul said God forbid that I should glory except in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ Galatians six fourteen it's the only sensible response to the awareness that whatever you are God made you whatever you have God gave you I love the way Moffat translated this phrase here in your text he said love makes no parade of itself it never throws a parade in its honor it's good isn't it here with the Corinthians petty boastful and proud they were all living in their own self-made towers demanding that when and whenever anybody got near them they were to lower their eyes out of honor and deference and respect in reality they were in the process of becoming pig headed people it was nothing less than sheer pig headed devilish pride think about it C.S. Lewis wrote it was pride that made the devil the devil Paul is making it very clear if you will love others as Christ loves you don't live to have what they want don't be what they have don't be jealous secondly don't become your favorite topic of conversation don't be a braggart Solomon said in Proverbs let another man praise you and not your own lips now he goes on in verse four and he adds and don't act with arrogance you see how these three just dovetail nicely together and I knew this was this was all we needed to do you could render it love doesn't strut around with an air of superiority your translation may read love isn't puffed up it's a good translation Warren Wiersbe once wrote that man is the only animal that when you pat him on the back his head swells up it's good isn't it it's interesting to me yet sad that the Corinthians had such an obvious problem with arrogance that listen to this six out of the seven times this verb appears in the New Testament it appears in this letter J.B. Phillips translates it well love does not cherish inflated ideas of its own importance this is the man in Luke 18 who prayed Oh God I thank you that I am not like other people this is a pig headed man I'm up in the tower Oh God thank you that I'm not down with the peasants below one author summarized this arrogant spirit well when he wrote arrogant people think they're better than other people they think they know more than they actually do they consider themselves holier than others and imagine themselves more gifted than they really are they are blind to their own glaring sins weaknesses and doctrinal errors arrogance blinds our eyes to the truth this is the same word Paul used to judge the Corinthian church the same body for not disciplining from its membership the unrepentant man from the assembly who refused to stop his sexually immoral relationship with his stepmother he continued his incest and the church thought they were exceptionally loving we are filled with love to include him and ignore his sin and Paul wrote in chapter five you have become arrogant physio same word in first Corinthians thirteen you have become full of yourselves that's what you are you're not tolerant you're not loving you're arrogant you're proud of your defiance and that message needs to be delivered today the church today that believes its tolerance towards sin and unrepentant sinners are badges of openness and love are actually self condemned by Christ for arrogance I pulled out the newspaper this week in fact I was I was over Chick-fil-a having my devotions oh I wouldn't have devotions I was reading USA Today and I pulled out this article sad article related to the continuing battle within the Episcopalian church relative to issues of homosexuality the article talked about a meeting that had been called recently there's a couple of pictures with many of the bishops and church leaders the article said the Archbishop of Canterbury himself actually flew over here and attended urging the American liberal bishops to make concessions for the sake of unity unity by the way they believe must be kept in spite of the fact that homosexual men are being ordained to church leadership unity that must be preserved while same sex couples are having their unions blessed with church prayers the archbishop in his attempt to keep the church unified pled with the liberal bishops to and I quote exercise restraint in approving another gay bishop how about exercising discipline how about warning of God's divine opinion regarding sodomy how about standing up for the words of God regarding man's relationships and judging any immoral sexual activity whether it is heterosexual or homosexual as both sinful and forgivable for this Christ died there is a call for the Episcopalians to exercise restraint my friends you do not exercise restraint regarding sin you do not sin in moderation Paul writes to the church in Corinth and the church today not just Episcopalians but Baptists and Methodists and non-denominationalists and effectively says you think you're loving by tolerating sin you've actually become through Seattle you actually become arrogant infatuated with your own intellectual gymnastics you are actually in love with your defiance you are in love with your autonomy from the word of God you've done nothing less than elevate your view above God's view and you are saying you are loving which implies God is not loving Paul told the church in Corinth related to this verb you can have fellowship with that incestuous man or you can have fellowship with God you cannot have both you can have my friend that hidden affair with a woman you work with or you can have God you cannot have both the Bible is clear that unrepentant adulterers go to hell when they die Hebrews 13 four you can swindle and you can cheat and you can lie or you can have God you cannot have both first Corinthians chapter six verse ten listen young people you can have sexual activity outside of marriage or you can have God you cannot have both revelation 21 verse eight but they say I love God no they don't they love themselves Paul put it this way true love for God and others would not be arrogant it doesn't proudly walk in a way that God clearly disapproves it doesn't elevate our view above God's view those who choose sin those who choose fellowship with sinners over fellowship with Christ do not know what true love is true love seeks to rescue the sinner from self-destructing that's true love true love seeks to bring that sinner into fellowship with Jesus Christ with a challenge to repent not pat him on the back and say everything is okay we're gonna love it's how distorted the truth of the church today has become true love seeks to find those who will worship God in spirit and in what truth what has Paul said about true love here first agape is the kind of love that doesn't act with envy secondly agape is the kind of love that doesn't brag about itself thirdly agape is the kind of love that is not inflated with its own opinions these three in a variety of ways and in varying degrees say the same thing true love is love surrendered in humility to Jesus Christ his opinions his words his life it is refusing to build a tower and put ourselves at the top and ask that everybody else grovel around us these three descriptions are a warning for those who would really like to escape the tower that we naturally construct and come back down to earth where pig-headed people are converted into big-hearted servants for those who will accept the humility and the selflessness of love as Paul has described it thanks for joining us today here on wisdom for the heart with Stephen Davey Stephen's the pastor of the shepherd's church in Cary North Carolina and he's our daily Bible teacher on this broadcast we're currently in a series called true love and I want to make sure you're aware that Stephen has a booklet that comes from this series if you'd like information on how you can get that resource call us today at eight six six forty eight Bible numerically it's eight six six four eight two four two five three you can also find it for yourself on our website wisdom online dot org I mentioned that Stephen pastors a church here in North Carolina and if your travel plans ever bring you this way please join us on a Sunday for a worship service we'd love to meet you face to face have a great weekend and join us Monday here on wisdom for the heart