Forgiveness

It's the hardest thing to give away And the last thing on your mind today It always goes to those who don't deserve It's the opposite of how you feel When the pain they caused is just too real It takes everything you have to say the word Forgiveness, forgiveness I can't hide it, I can't hold it in your heart A daily program powered by the Truth Network This is kind of a great thing and I'll tell you why Where pop culture, current events, and theology all come together Speak your mind And now, here's today's Truth Talk Live host What is the hardest thing you ever had to forgive? And how did God help you through that?

I would love to hear your views. This is a live talk show And so, you know, we definitely are looking forward to the calls that we receive on this topic today The number to call in and share to answer that question is 866-348-7884 That number again, 866-348-7884 What is the hardest thing you ever had to forgive and how did God help you through that, right? And so when you think about this, you know, I'm hoping a story comes to mind And I'm also hoping that you will call us And I'll tell you why, because there could be somebody that's going through something about like that And when they hear your story of how God came for you It may give them some ideas on how God could come for them And it could enter them into the process of getting released from that poison of unforgiveness Again, what is the hardest thing you ever had to forgive and how did God help you through that? 866-348-7884 The number to call in and share 866-348-7884 That's a really cool thing if you look up the word forgiveness in the Bible You're going to find that Joseph's brothers The first place you'll find it is that, you know, they're asking like, help us out, Joe You know, we've done some bad stuff and we need you to forgive us But that word in Hebrew is also the same word to lift up things Almost like you would lift up an offering, as my friend Randy told me a few minutes ago But it's kind of cool to think that you're lifting this burden off of yourself And actually hopefully offer that other person, whatever the situation may be You know, I know you've got a story, call us 866-348-7884 You might even think about that the hardest person The hardest thing you ever had to forgive was yourself about something And maybe how God helped you walk through that situation I mean, that's a tricky one and I really find it, personally, that's the hardest one As C.S. Lewis put it, we talked about it yesterday That sometimes we get a whiff of our inner cesspool And we've done things that we can't believe we would do But we did it, and now how can we forgive ourselves We know God if we're, you know, 1 John 1-9, if we're faithful and we confess our sins, right?

He's faithful to forgive those But man, how do we get there? So, you know, I have the one story that I want to share of my own And, you know, when I had the Chrysler dealership, those who know me well know I'm the Christian car guy, name's Robbie Dilmore And we were the, actually when I started doing the Christian car guy in 2006 I was the Chrysler dealer in Mocksville, North Carolina And I had an office manager by the name of Frankie Who, you know, for whatever reason started to embezzle lots of money And I had no idea until actually we got an audit from Chrysler Financial And they explained to me, Robbie, you know, your statement has shown That you got about $600,000 more in the bank than you have And that was a lot of money And, you know, immediately that threw a whole lot of things out of whack But actually by the time all was said and done What the statement had on it versus how much money was actually gone Was almost $2 million And it's not like we had that kind of money The unfortunate part was that so much money had been taken out That they hadn't paid our payroll taxes And some other things that were receivable So we were way, way, way upside down Which ended up costing us the dealership And it ended up costing me, you know, what I'd worked for essentially my life And at that point, or so I thought, God had other plans for us But nonetheless, a lot of employees lost their jobs And it was a hard time We lost our house, we lost our credit, we lost a lot And it wasn't long before, you know, obviously Frankie was arrested And it just so happened that the state of North Carolina Was the one that was bringing her up on charges And of course, when it came time for the trial They called me, the state did, and asked me to come testify And they said, Robbie, we really want the judge to get an idea That this isn't a victimless crime That essentially, you know, we want the court and the judge to see, you know That, you know, people lost their jobs, their livelihoods, their investments Their life savings, kind of thing, you know And so, you know, naturally I went there But I'm obviously at that same time trying to work through this forgiveness thing And asking God to help me, you know And fascinatingly, I just love what he did I love what he did, and to God all the glory So the night before I was to go testify I'm praying, praying, praying And God makes it clear to me in my heart Robbie, that judge is going to ask you And I know that I knew this as clear as I knew anything That that judge was going to ask me what the sentence should be for her crime In other words, how much time would you give her? And I actually knew that ahead of time I really did, and I'd already processed my answer I wish that I had really asked God to give me more information on the answer But I clearly had to work through, God, how do I let this go?

I mean, how do I let this go? And all I can say is, he took it I don't know, I knew I wanted to let it go But I also knew that my heart didn't want to let it go And somehow or another, it got gone before I ever showed up in the courtroom that morning The courtroom was in Raleigh, and of course it's a pretty far drive from Winston-Salem And I had time to think about it and pray about it and all that stuff All I know is when I went in that courtroom, I had not seen Frankie for almost a year And the last time I saw her, I just looked at her and I said, why? And she just looked at me with this look I'd never seen on her face before And it was a tough scene And so, just like God had told me We'd go through the whole testifying And she would not even look at me during me testifying She looked very angry And it came time where she pled guilty And they were going to sentence her And the judge turned right over to me And said, essentially, Robbie I think that nobody knows better than you What the penalty should be for this crime So how much time, and these are exact words How much time, Robbie, do you think we should give her for this crime? And I'm going, I already knew that God had told me that this was going to happen So I had to answer all prepared And I was like, well, judge, and again, I was not feeling any bitterness at all towards Frankie at this point in time I really wasn't, I'd forgiven her and realized that God was going to make it all right And so I just said, judge, you have years of law experience And you understand the law and you understand what she's done And I trust you completely with whatever you think the exact right thing is Whatever you think, I'll go with that And he looked at me and he goes, I'm not letting you get away with that He said, I want to know how much time should she serve And God did give me the answer to that question But he gave it to me, waited until then to give me the answer to that question When we come back, I'll share that answer But I would even love, love, love to have How about you, what's the hardest thing you have ever had to forgive And how did God get you through that? 866-348-7884, 866-348-7884 Give us a call, we need it You're listening to the Truth Network and truthnetwork.com What is the hardest thing you have ever had to forgive? And how did God get you through that? I would love to know your story, I really would And you know, what an encouragement you could be for so many By sharing it, 866, and I'm going to call in 866-348-7884, 866-348-7884 And as we were finishing up this last segment I was talking about the story of when we had lost a dealership And we literally lost everything minus a whole lot That I ended up owing the state of North Carolina and the IRS But worse than all of that was the Small Business Administration Oh my goodness, and I'm still actually paying on that to this day It was a financial catastrophe, there's no doubt about that But fascinatingly, God gave me such a piece over all this And there I was, testifying against Frankie But I should mention, some of the guys in the studio said You know, what was she like? Well, she was at the time in her 70s I think, as I recall Which at that time to me seemed a lot older than it does now But anyway, and she had been like a grandmother to my kids She used to pick them up from school for us She was definitely our secretary treasurer, the board of the company And at one point in time, even a stockholder in the company And so none of this was making any sense when it started to come undone But boy, there she was, and the judge had asked me I mean, he couldn't have been more direct How much time do you think she should serve? And again, I told you, God got me through this, and he did You know how it says in scripture that when they ask you to testify He will give you the words, and I still can't believe this came out of my mouth But he put it there, and I know that he did, because I had no answer And here's what came out of my mouth was Sir, I really don't understand how having a 70-year-old, and she was a grandmother To serve a lot of time in prison for this would really serve the state of North Carolina However, when I go back and I face all the people that lost their job And all the people that lost money in the dealership And all the people that we owe based on what happened I don't want to be able to think or say or anything along those lines That she got away with it And he said that's what I wanted to hear And he walked back, and he was in his chambers for about 10-15 minutes And he walked out, and he said I'm sentencing you to five years, and I'm suspending it to one And so that's what happened She was found guilty, and certainly she served her year And I always felt like God totally orchestrated that And I don't have to feel like I determined her sentence in any way, shape, or form But by the same time, I felt like God gave me the words to say at that moment when I needed them And so there's no doubt in my mind, none whatsoever, that he will When you run out of solutions for yourself In other words, when you finally do humble yourself and say I got nothing And I didn't have anything Then he's going to come through for you And that idea of forgiveness There's a level of humility in that that I really didn't understand at that level Until I went through that particular experience But here's the thing, everybody goes through these things differently And that's why I would love, love, love to hear your story And it's burning in your heart right now, so you gotta have the courage to share it Because believe me, it will encourage somebody else Which is why we have this show, it's a live show And the number to call is 866-348-7884 That number again is 866-348-7884 And you know, some of the challenging verses along these lines Psalms 103 12, right? It says, you know, As far as the east is from the west, so far he has removed our transgressions from us Like, oh my goodness, that isn't a little bit of forgiveness That's taking it about as far as you can go And so as he's forgiven us our sins Everybody in the Lord's Prayer forgives us our sins as we have forgiven us You know, and so here's the standard, like, you gotta be able to put it that far And I don't know about you, but that's gonna require God from my standpoint In other words, it's pretty hard to let go of all those things that far and to that extent And so, you know, what does that look like in your life? 866-348-7884 I got my buddy Mike who's in Dayton, Ohio Mike, I bet you got a story Well, I'll try to make it short, I know it's only an hour show You know, it's not easy I understand Yeah, well, the guy who hurt me was my best man in my wedding Oh wow Yeah, he's taught me how to do curved staircases in California And he taught me how to surf and he was my best friend And all along I worked my tail off because he was my best friend And for him, and I was so And he kept promising me that he was gonna be my partners in this business And once we get it to a certain point I'll let you run this part and you can do that part Well, anyways, to make a long story short, none of that really happens And all the money's coming in like crazy and I can see it coming in And all of a sudden he calls me up one day and says, I'm moving to Oregon And I'm like, what?

You're moving to Oregon? He says, yeah, I'm gonna leave you You know, you can stay and you can do the business But I'm not gonna give it to you, I'll let you run the business But I'm not gonna give it to you, I'll let you take care of the business here And I'm gonna move to Oregon So anyways, to make a long story short Not to be mean, but I made him enough money that he can move to Oregon And we worked mega hours and mega time And I was young and I had two young kids And I was wanting to provide for my family and do all that stuff And I worked 60, 70, sometimes even 90 hours And it just, it really hurt my heart And well, to make a long story short God laid on my heart to move back to my hometown in Ohio And I just couldn't believe that God was gonna, you know My wife, I met her in California She's not gonna want to move back to Ohio And I asked her that question and she said yes And I was amazed that she said yes And I said okay We started, we moved back to Ohio My brother helped me move back to Ohio We lived in his house And it was hard, oh my gosh it was hard My brother was very particular about things And stuff like that And anyways, God provided for us all the way through that And I still had resentment over, I'll say his name, Mark And I had resentment over Mark It really, it really, really, really hurt my feelings And he called the other day and he, or I called him honestly And we had a conversation and I told him I forgave him And then we had, you know, and it was, it was relief off my chest And it's not easy to do that, you know Oh no, no, no, it's not, it's not Mike Well we gotta go to a break as you can probably hear Mike But we got Gary is in Toledo, Ohio We'll get to him in a minute and we're gonna finish up with Mike But we may need your story In fact I definitely need your story 866-348-7884 We'll be right back What is the hardest thing you ever had to forgive And how did God help you through that today on Truth Talk Live We would love to hear your story The number to call us with yours is 866-348-7884 866-348-7884 We got Gary in Toledo, Ohio Michael, we'll get to Gary in a minute Let me finish up with you Michael real quick That sounds like, that's really fresh stuff right there Yeah it's still fresh Because I'm in the construction business still And you know it's something that I have to almost every day Just forgive, you know what I mean Because it really hurt my heart And I wasn't able to start a business with partnership with him And so you make, I think it's a very important point For a lot of us, in a lot of situations It isn't a one and done thing In other words, yeah I forgive him and then I got to forgive him again And for the same thing that happened years ago It seems like God keeps bringing it up Because there's more cleansing that's available Because it takes a long time to get from the east to the west Right? Right, and you got to humble yourself and let God heal you And let God, the spirit of God understand that you know I'm with you and I'm for you and I'm not against you Even though this bad thing happened against you You know what I mean, a person did this That really maybe, you know maybe not on purpose Maybe, maybe just out of necessity You know you never know But you know again, you just, it's humbling to trust God And what is direction in your life And I can see that story lying with God in the direction of my life I was able to be with my dad at the end When he passed I was able to have a great relationship As an elder gentleman with my dad I was able to you know, just you know Grow in the Lord with different things Because I, you know because of the direction that God changed I wouldn't be on the radio here if it hadn't been for Frankie In it's own way, you know I get it, I get it, I get it And I probably, yeah I probably wouldn't be talking to you today If it wasn't for the direction They don't have truth network in California Or maybe they do now Not yet, but they need to have it Not yet Yes you ain't kidding, they do Thank you Robbie Thank you Mike, God bless I appreciate your call so much Gary is in Toledo I appreciate you hanging on for us man So I listened to your story And I listened to this man's, the other man's story And to make a short dent out of it My wife and I decided that we had both lost our jobs So I worked for a major corporation And some of the people that we dealt with Says you need to go out on your own So I did And the accountant told me, he says You lost $125,000 last year I wouldn't know where it went I said, good question Cause that's more money than I've ever seen Right And you know So I had bought her quick books to take care of the books And at the end, after 13 and a half years She decides that we're bankrupt And there was $279,000 And the thing that I can't still understand is You know, where do you spend that kind of money? And we collected every dime we owed That was owed to us And so with me, look I had stuck it to the accountant and had him look over the books again He said I got a feeling she got you for more than $279,000 He says, I thought, I figured You know, just an estimate They're $400,000 And then I found out that she decides that she wants a divorce With her three sisters They ain't one of them that mounted the hill of beans Well, she had two sisters And they were nothing but gold diggers And I have two sons And today, they still can't understand why You know, I forgive her But, you know, they're identically like her And the idea that they don't understand why that I don't want to be around her You know, when you steal from me That's the end of the road And, you know, the idea that You know, I was homeless for three and a half months And she ended up losing the house And God put me with a woman that I should have married 55 years ago You know, in my life, I moved away from where they were And now I'm as happy as a songbird, you know And without God, I would have never made that I know the feeling, I know the feeling And so, wow, it's one thing to have a partner do it to your wife That's really hard And apparently, it was your wife that you'd had two sons with So how old were your sons when this happened? My boys actually worked for me off and on And they were 21 and 24 Wow And the hardest thing I have is she wouldn't rate my reputation Because she didn't pay no vendors That's where that money's at But, you know, they don't understand why I don't want to be anywhere in the same room with her Or her sister, you know And if I could have met the wife I have now I would have been the happiest person on Earth You know, but now I'm the happiest man that you could ever dream of You know, everything's ideal And the sad part is, she got away with all that No she didn't You know, we had dinner one day with the kids And she wanted me to give her the books back Where she could rearrange, where she didn't have to pay no taxes Because I put the business in her name Where I could get, you know, government stuff and everything And, you know, to do that She stole that and then she turned around and stole another bunch of money That I'd done a bunch of work after we had filed bankruptcy And, you know, I just don't see how that, you know I would add a couple things that might help, Gary Okay God is pretty clear, vengeance is mine, I will repay Okay And so there is an accounting, believe me And financially is nothing compared to the accounting that's at hand In other words, oh my goodness I mean, the thought of what happens to people that don't truly repent and give God everything In other words And so there is an idea that I guarantee it You know, Christ died for all of that You know, whether or not she's accepted it at this point completely or not That I don't know But I do know that certainly there was something to be paid and it was paid But the other interesting thing, and I'll just share this with you I remember one time I was really, really mad at Frankie And some other things that had gone on with other employees that I felt like had conspired to an extent And I can remember yelling at God And the conversation went something like this It was like, I hope you're paying attention, God, to all that they have done And all of a sudden, I heard this still small voice Oh, I'm paying attention, Robbie, do you really want me to have them pay for all of that?

In other words, Robbie, do you want to pay for all of your sin? And the answer to that question was Forgive me, Lord Help me No, no, I don't want a full accounting here I'm getting the picture that, you know, forgive us as we have forgiven them And it's a tough thing And I agree with Mike that sometimes it's not a one and done, but man But I can assure you one thing I know that I know that God is keeping it exactly how it should be And he will make it right I don't know exactly the details of how he makes it right In your case or my case But I do know he will make it right When you're working 90 to 100 hours every week for better than 10 years Right And that's hard to swallow this, you know Believe me, you know, those last months as we're going out of business I didn't pay myself a dime And, you know, I was working for free And essentially worked for free for 12 years or whatever all went into that But however, right Yeah, my grandson said to me a while back He says, Grandpa, why didn't you restart? I said, you know, son, it's just too much After all I've done, it's hard to restart all that You know, when you Yeah, your reputation, your credit and all that, yeah Oh, yeah, absolutely It is, it is, it is Well, he got married soon and I said, I'll come But I ain't sitting with the family yet Well, thank you so much for your call, Gary We'll continue to pray for you guys in that And, you know, you got a story out there with somebody else We need your call 866-348-7884, 866-348-7884 Thank you, Gary God bless Help me now to do the impossible Forgiveness What is the hardest thing you have ever had to forgive? And how did God help you through that? That's a story that we would all love to hear, believe me We're all struggling with this at some level with somebody or some situation And the number to call in and share is 866-348-7884, 866-348-7884 And as we talked about at the top of the show One of the most difficult, and I find it extremely difficult To forgive is yourself, right? And I have a story along those lines And so he's called in, I guess God wants me to share it So it goes something like this that I really struggled You know, 15 years or so ago with lust and pornography And so, you know, that's not a good struggle to have by any means And I really had so much shame about it, it was unbelievable And again, talking about forgiving yourself, right? And so I had been waiting for some type of healing Praying, God, show me what to do with this, show me what to do with this And I had a dear, dear friend share a story about some counseling he was getting And how the counselor told him to get in touch with his younger self And the great news is that Jesus lives in eternity So he can help you see the situation and help you process it When you see that your younger self got involved in something And part of what you gotta do is forgive that younger person Because you live in eternity too, in your own way And that there's you in the present, but there's you in the past And you have to stay together And so I thought that was really good wisdom And so I began to ask Jesus through prayer to show me what that looked like in my own life And was there something in early Robbie's life that caused me to have this addiction and this problem And, you know, that was certainly hurting me, hurting my marriage, hurting, you know, all these things And he took me back to a story that actually happened with a close family member When I was a child, and I didn't realize that I had been essentially duped out of my innocence And as Jesus was actually counseling with me in this particular thing And understand all these conversations are going on in my heart with Jesus As we're processing these things that had happened when I was younger And Jesus said to me very clearly in my heart, he said, Robbie, here's your innocence card, I want you to take it And I said, you don't understand, I can't take it, I'm guilty And he said, Robbie, take it, this is your innocence card, you can be innocent again, take it And I said, you don't understand, I am guilty, I did these things, these are real, I hurt people, you know, this is horrible And he looked at me in the way that only Jesus can look at you and he said, Robbie, didn't I pay enough And believe me, when your savior looks at you and says that, you take your innocence card, right I accepted his forgiveness And I've carried that innocence card very loyally as he cured me from those things back then And I can honestly say that I would never have thought that you could beat that addiction I would have thought that that could never be handled But it happened as a result of forgiveness for myself through Jesus Christ who paid for it But it requires the humility to A, admit that you're struggling, to B, admit that you don't have the power to forgive that He does, and that he paid enough to get it done and to receive it It's hard to receive something like that, but therein lies what I think is an amazing gift that God has for everybody in the Christianity in and of itself So we have Penny, is in North Carolina, Penny, you're on Truth Talk Live, thank you for calling Yes sir, thank you for having me I wanted to share my story, our daddy was an extraordinary man And he and my mother had a very successful business and he had a stroke And it was similar to your story, the lady that was their secretary was like an aunt to us And he was trusted with the deposit, and our daddy was the person that took care of the finances And my mother was the worker, and so mama didn't really watch it as closely as daddy would have And when my sister came home from Tallahassee, she was a psychologist and came home to help when daddy was progressively getting worse I mean he was only 54, and Laurie said, mama, there's a lot of money When we figured it out, when Laurie figured it out, it was about $500,000 Oh my goodness And that's what we figured out, so there's no telling what else And I'll never ever ever forget my daddy telling her, all you had to do was ask me And I would have given you anything, anything And of course all the sisters were wanting to prosecute, and daddy, I really believe for Kathy, Kathy was the lady's name I really believe that God showed her his forgiveness, you know, I mean she was of course just crying hysterically But daddy said, you know Kathy, Jesus forgives us, and I forgive you, and there are consequences to our sin There are consequences, but I'm going to forgive you, and I'm going to show you how much Jesus loves you and forgives you And I mean we were just, we were flabbergasted I can imagine, but wow Yes sir, yes sir, yes sir, and of course God blessed abundantly above more than we could ever have asked, thought or dreamed But just a true, true testament of God's forgiveness, you know, none of us deserve it Right None of us You're right, you're exactly right But he, as I said, was an extraordinary man, and he's with Jesus today But it was just a very teachable moment that I teach my children Now there are consequences to sin, and that's another, you know, that's another, that's another situation No, let me tell you, because, you know, after the story I was just telling, you know, after I dealt with Jesus, he made it Honestly, if I didn't live this I wouldn't believe it, but I had a marriage retreat that I was going to two weeks later Oh wow And at the end of that marriage retreat, they said now we want you to get together as a couple and go and share something you've never been able to share with your spouse before My most beloved wife Tammy had told me many times, especially when we went to see Fireproof together, she looked at me and if I ever found out you were doing anything like that, I would divorce you on the spot And so I was terrified, but I knew that God had put it on my heart, I had to share that Well when you tell your wife something like that and you watch her heart break Oh, oh, oh You see it for real, what you've done, like oh my goodness, however, you know, it took some time, but she did forgive me, but you know at the end of that And again, I don't recommend you just go try this at home, you need to work through this with God, but nonetheless, at the end of it, for the first time in my life, Tammy loved me Not the image that I was portraying to her that I was, but she knew how broken I was And for the first time I felt truly loved because it was something I'd never been able to tell her that I was struggling with, that I'd struggled with before we were married And so, you know, it's an amazing opportunity that we have in Christ to receive the forgiveness, but also to see the consequence of your sin and to face up to it And allow God to show you what it's like to be, you know, in a relationship where it works Amen, Amen, well I appreciate all that you do and love listening, and Godspeed And when I heard you, I hadn't heard that you were from North Carolina or had lived in North Carolina, but Yeah, that's where I am No, when you've had it, yeah, that's where it happened, nowhere on earth like North Carolina So what was your dad's name? Earl, Earl Tipton, they had, he had lots of businesses, and as I said, he was an extraordinary businessman And he just had, he knew God, he knew God, you know, when he went to heaven, people said, y'all worshiped your daddy We didn't worship our daddy, he had an ability to take our hand and put it in Christ Amen, that is a wonderful picture, thank you so much Penny And thank you everyone for listening for your stories today, they mean so much You guys have a blessed weekend, we'll be back on Monday, God bless