On Being a Young Christian Woman #2

Ladies, if you spend more time thinking about and working on your makeup than you do working on your character and reading the Word of God and seeking that out, it's probably time for you to reassess life because the scripture is clear on this point. The young Christian woman in the church may be fortunate to have good mentors in the more mature women of the congregation, but whether she does or doesn't, she has perfect guidance available in the form of God's Word. And that's where Pastor Don Green will turn once again today on the Truth Pulpit.

Hi, I'm Bill Wright. We're continuing a series in the book of Titus titled God's Glorious Plan of Grace. We'll hear part two of the message on being a young Christian woman. Last time, Don showed us the priorities of relationships, as in marriage and family, as well as righteousness.

Today, he'll give us two more R's, residence and revelation. So turn to Titus chapter two as we join our teacher now in the Truth Pulpit. Look over at 1 Peter chapter three. 1 Peter chapter three, Paul is again speaking to wives.

He calls them in verse two to chaste and respectful behavior. And he says in verse three that your adornment must not be merely external, braiding the hair and wearing gold jewelry or putting on dresses, but let it be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit which is precious in the sight of God. Ladies, the call in your life is to make yourself precious in the sight of God if you're a Christian.

That's the only thing that matters is what God thinks about you. And what God wants from you is this gentle and quiet and modest spirit rather than that which makes a display of yourself to men around you. God calls you to cultivate a gentle disposition that is conscious of modesty and purity even though the world pulls you to focus on your appearance. Ladies, you have the call of God, you have the permission of God, you have the affirmation of God, you have the blessing of God on your life to consciously reject what the world models for you and say, no, I will be different because I rejected that ungodliness and now I'm going to embrace and cloak myself with the righteousness that God calls me to. And let me say this gently but as a point of application, just to help you have a place to hang your thoughts and a place to consider what the Word of God is saying to you. I say it in love. I say it because I desire the blessing of God on your life more than anything else.

I want the blessing of God on your life more than I want you to approve of what I'm saying. Ladies, if you spend more time thinking about and working on your makeup than you do working on your character and reading the Word of God and seeking that out, it's probably time for you to reassess life because our priorities are expressed in the way that we spend our time. If you dull over yourself day after day after day while simultaneously having no place or time or room in your life for the Word of God and an earnest seeking of Him in prayer, you need to reexamine the whole direction of what you're doing because the Scripture is clear on this point that godliness, not makeup, is the point of a Christian woman. So there's this priority of righteousness, this priority of modesty that God calls us to, calls especially ladies to in Titus chapter 2 verses 4 and 5. Now, point number 3. We've seen the priority of relationships, the priority of righteousness. Point number 3 is we're going to see the priority of your residence.

The priority of your residence. Look at verse 5 again. Paul says that the younger women are to be sensible and pure.

That's what we just looked at. Workers at home, kind and being subject to their own husbands. Ladies, the Bible clearly calls you to make the home your priority. In light of Proverbs 31, it would be too much to say that a Christian woman should only be at home.

Proverbs 31 speaks of a variety of activities that a godly woman is doing. And so we don't want to speak beyond what the Bible says. But, ladies, let's be honest with each other as we look at the world around us.

Let's not even talk about your life in particular right now. Let's just look at the world around us and acknowledge the environment here. The threat to biblical righteousness these days and for the past 50 or 60 years is not that women would be home too much.

Right? That's not the threat that we're facing today. So we don't need to really focus on, well, what the perimeter of that realm is. The threat is that the women are home too little. They're not home enough when the Scripture calls them to be workers at home. Look at verse 5 with me again. You must see, you must see that this is the Word of God, not the grumblings of an irritated pastor.

I'm not grumbling and I'm not irritated, so it couldn't be that. Look at verse 5. Young women, be workers at home and be kind. And so, ladies, the home is to be the preeminent sphere of your work. It's the preeminent sphere. It's to be the dominating priority of the way that you order your life.

It's somehow shaped around the home. Now, I want to say something pastoral here, very, very much alongside this. I understand that for some ladies, life has forced you into the workplace. I understand that. And I understand that given your own priorities, given what you would do, you would prefer to be home, but somehow circumstances have made it so that you must work. Someone's a widow, someone's husband is incapacitated, and they just have no other choice.

I believe the Lord looks on that with compassion and with grace. And here's what I would say about that for those situations, is that if life has forced you into the workplace, just guard your heart. Just guard your heart so that you don't find yourself loving the workplace more than you love your home.

Guard your heart. Be content while you're waiting in this situation that God has placed you in that is not exactly what you would have chosen. You would prefer to be home. I get that. You would rather be able to devote yourself, but you just can't. Well, if that's where you find yourself, be content while you're waiting and don't hand your heart over to the pursuit of this and say, this is an exception.

This is different. This isn't what I would choose, but I'll do this with a glad and content heart because this is what I have to do in order to love my husband and to love my children. It's an expression of that. But ladies, as you think about the priority of your home, let me put it this way. Another question for a point of application, whether the home is your priority or something else. Here's a question to help you assess that. When people ask you the simple question, who are you or what do you do?

What do you do? What's the first thing that comes out of your mouth? I serve at home, is the answer of a woman who is guided by biblical priorities. She defines herself. She thinks about herself in light of these priorities and what's in her heart becomes what comes out of her mouth when she's asked to define herself. If something else comes first to your mind, you need to think about what God is saying here in His Word. The call of God is for young women to be workers at home with all of the qualifications that we realize and recognize from a pastoral role. Ladies, the question is what's your priority?

What's your greatest love on earth? That's the question. As you're thinking about your home, Paul goes on and says, and he kind of comes back to the issue of the husband in verse 5. He says in verse 5 that to be pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands.

As you think about the priority of your home, ladies, understand that it is the call of God on your life to line yourself up under the authority of your husband. Yeah, I get it. That's not what the world says. Precisely.

You know what? The utter rejection of the world of this simply clarifies the issues for us, doesn't it? The fact that this is not what the world thinks, that the world calls on you to demand your rights and equal privileges and all of that, the fact that the world calls you on that is the opportunity to bounce off of that and go the other way, to be subject to your own husband, to recognize the leadership position of your husband and to honor it. And once again, this is woven throughout the New Testament. Turn to Ephesians chapter 5. I want you to see that this is the consistent teaching of the Word of God. This is not an isolated verse in Titus.

This is not a speaker that has gone off on a tangent into realms which the Word of God does not speak clearly on. Ladies, this is the call of God on your life. This is what Christ calls you to as part of His intention to purify a people for His own possession.

The women that He owns live like this. Ephesians chapter 5 verse 22. Wives, be subject to your own husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be subject to their husbands in everything.

As Christians, it is unthinkable to think that we would rebel against Christ and go our own way after He saved us. That's the parallel that Christ makes to wives and husbands in a Christian marriage. Look over at Colossians chapter 3, just a couple of books to the right. Colossians and Ephesians are parallel books in many ways covering the same themes. Chapter 3 verse 18 in Colossians.

Wives, be subject to your husbands as is fitting in the Lord. And then in 1 Peter, just past Titus and past Hebrews. 1 Peter chapter 3. 1 Peter chapter 3 in verse 1.

And ladies, there's so much help for you in this. Those of you maybe that have a lot of conflict in your relationship with your husband, you can let go actually. Chapter 3 verse 1. In the same way you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. Ladies, what God has given you in the marriage relationship and the way that he has structured the relationship is an umbrella of protection. He has given you a place of blessing. He has given you a place where you don't have to fight the world on your own. He's given you a husband to lead you and to be a protector to you. I realize that the men fall short of that.

And shame on us for our failures. But that doesn't redefine your priorities or what you do. You are to be subject to your own husband.

You are to bring yourself and line yourself up under him. Now that doesn't mean that a wife doesn't express her thoughts. That's foolishness. A wise husband listens to a wise wife.

I learned this over the years. But the more I listen to Nancy, the more that my life tends to go well. And when I reject what she has to say, I'm usually going to pay a price for it. This does not make the woman a silent, bumbling fool in the relationship. But it means that she recognizes the God-given place, the God-given authority of her husband, and she lives in peaceable cooperation with his leadership.

She follows the authority of the husband in her home. That's God's design. That's what God calls you to do. And ladies, I have to say this. If you're a constant source of strife and irritation to your husband, you need to reassess what you're doing. Let me say a word to those of you who are not married yet. To you young ladies that aren't married yet, in light of this principle, can I give you a word of pastoral advice? If you're not married yet, or if you're even younger, you're in your early teens and this is still a ways off, start thinking about these things and understand that because of the God-appointed role that a wife has in a marriage relationship, you should do this. You should not rush into a decision to get married. You should not hurry into a relationship with a man that you really don't know very well. Because you are setting yourself up. When you enter into marriage, it no longer matters if you made a mistake. Your responsibility is to line up under his authority. And that I understand. You know, I've heard men joke about this and just say, hurry up and get married.

I don't think that way at all. This is too important. Your life is at stake to treat it so lightly. Now ladies, ladies, give yourself time.

Watch this man that you're interested in and let's give him some time to manifest what his character is really like so that you know what you're getting into as much as you possibly can. Don't rush into that because there's no back door. There's no way to get out.

Divorce is not an option for a Christian woman. And so you young ladies, I'm just trying to protect you. I'm not trying to restrain you.

I'm trying to protect you and help you to understand and to think about life properly. Take time to see if this man will abuse his authority over you. How does he treat his mother? That's an indication of how he's one day going to treat you. How does he treat the people around him? Don't think that you're an exception. Eventually, his character as he deals with the world around him now is going to be the measure of how he treats you in the future.

And if he's an angry, striking kind of man, he's going to be angry and strike you eventually. So don't treat this lightly. Oh, I know the saddest story. Actually, it turned out okay in the end.

But for a time it was terrible. I had a friend quite some distance from here. It's no one that any of you would know. I'm not talking about anything here or in my prior life of ministry. This is totally separate.

It's no one that you know. But I have a friend, a little bit older than me, who had an adult daughter. She wanted to be married, but the years were going by and she started to get nervous. She started to get anxious. And so when the first guy that expressed interest into her, she latched onto it.

Perhaps understandably, but without a full acquaintance of what this man was like. She didn't wait long enough. She jumped at the chance to get married and I guess thought, we'll sort all the other stuff out later. Now the guy seemed outwardly to be fine. She got married. She kind of rushed into it. Things were fine for a week, for the second week, and he beat her. It was so bad that eventually the authorities got involved.

He was prosecuted and sent to jail and he's in jail today. God graciously delivered her from that situation and has placed her in a different situation now. Here's my only point on that, ladies. You young, unmarried ladies. Don't get married with your fingers crossed. I realize you can never fully know what the future holds, but you can protect yourself from marrying somebody you don't really know. You can't just assume that it's all going to work out okay.

You put that guy's character to the test. You're entitled to do that. You're putting yourself under his authority. You're entitled to know, ladies, the man who's going to assume the reigns of that authority in your life.

You're entitled to test his character, to see him prove it, and if he fails the test, separate yourself from your emotions and say, no, I don't think so. I think I'll wait for the next bus to come in. You're never going to regret that. And you dads especially help your kids think through this. You dads especially help them and protect your daughters. Love them, affirm them, help them on this area in particular. You moms, of course, can do this too.

But it's the priority of relationships. A godly woman gives herself in subjection to her husband. And ladies, if you have a godly husband, if you have a husband that's loved you and cherished you in light of what we've said here today, this would be a great day to just thank him and affirm him for that. If God's given you a gracious husband, he's spared you from the nightmare that can happen, you go and you thank him for that.

Thank God and then you thank your husband because these issues of life matter. There's one final thing here as we close. Fourth point, we'll keep it brief. It's the priority of revelation. The priority of revelation. Why do you do all of this to begin with? Why do you worry about the priority of relationships, righteousness, and residence?

Why do you do that? Well, it's because of the ultimate priority of revelation. Look at the end of verse 5. Paul says, be this way, end of verse 5, so that the word of God will not be dishonored. If you could state it in a positive way, what Paul is saying is that ladies, when you honor the biblical instruction that's here and the way that you shape and think about life, you're honoring the word of God. God himself is honored by women who live this way and cultivate this kind of character in their lives.

Ladies, let me encourage you. Let me do everything that I can in the weakness of my voice to affirm to you the utter importance of what you're doing. Your home impacts a watching world. Your home impacts the way the word of God is perceived. And Christian homes, like the one that you're trying to cultivate and produce, commend the gospel.

They uphold and glorify the name of Christ. Listen, a loving, pure, submissive wife is a stunning testimony against the feminist, lesbian mindset that is now controlling our age. A godly, gentle wife testifies against all of that without even having to open her mouth or organize a political rally. Just the way that you live condemns that and commends the gospel.

Ladies, let me say this to you too. A kind, sacrificial mother who loves her children and serves them is a stunning testimony, a stunning testimony against a world that sees children as inconveniences to be aborted on demand. When you love your children, when the size of your family makes it kind of inconvenient and cramped in the car and all of that stuff, been there, done that, your loving, gracious attitude to your children separates your life out. It marks it out and says, and by your very life you are testifying to the saving power of the gospel of Christ. Your very life becomes a testimony without you even trying. That's what Paul's talking about here.

We live this way so that we don't dishonor the Word of God. By implication, ladies, when you set your heart on this kind of life, you're setting your heart upon the very purposes for which God laid His hand upon you in Christ Jesus. And that is a beautiful thing. That is a woman of beauty. That is a woman who if no one else notices come to that judgment seat where believers meet their Lord. And He will bless you and He will affirm you.

Well done, thou good and faithful servant. It's Don Green, founding pastor of Truth Community Church in Cincinnati, Ohio, wrapping up his message on being a young Christian woman here on the Truth Pulpit. Don, what words of encouragement can you offer to young Christian women who feel so pressured by our society and culture to embrace a more feminist perspective?

Well, ladies, let me just tell you this. I care about this issue very directly. Not only am I married, but I have five daughters that I love very much who have to fight these issues in their own lives.

Let me just say a couple of things real quickly. First of all, remember that Scripture is your authority, not what the society would throw at you. And then remember in a very personal way the love of Christ for your soul. He gave Himself on a cross because He loves you.

You can respond to Him knowing that He'll lead you and care for you as you walk for Him in this world. Thanks, Don. And friend, we hope you'll visit thetruthpulpit.com to find out how to get free CDs of Don's messages. That's thetruthpulpit.com. Now for Don Green, I'm Bill Wright, inviting you back next time when Don presents more from The Truth Pulpit.