This is The Rich Eisen Show.
Three, two, one. Daniel Jeremiah here on The Rich Eisen Show. From The Rich Eisen Show studio in Los Angeles. What are you hearing coming out of the draft about why there were no trades at the top? I know there was a lot of action at three, so Drake May was a big target.
There was no offer that was worth it. Earlier on the show, Rams general manager Les Snead, Ravens head coach John Harbaugh, Patriots head coach Jerrod Mayo. Coming up, legendary comedian Jerry Seinfeld. And now it's Rich Eisen. Hour number three of The Rich Eisen Show is on the air and Jerry Seinfeld is about to join us.
Holy crap. We're all excited about it. He's got a new film that he directed. It's his directorial debut called Unfrosted. Just when you thought you didn't need a movie that treats the creation of the pop tart as a space race type war between Post and Kellogg's. Jerry comes along with what you need. I think it looks so good.
Sounds genius. And that's on Netflix and it starts streaming tonight at midnight. And so it'll be all day tomorrow is when you can first start seeing. And the cameos are all over the place.
One that I cannot reveal, but it's amazing. It's fantastic. And it starts on Friday. And he plays a Kellogg's executive. Jim Gaffigan is his boss. Melissa McCarthy is his protege. Fantastic.
All sorts of great stuff. Bill Burr plays JFK. Fantastic. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
He's perfect. Is John F. Kennedy. Yes. He plays the president at the time. Wow.
JFK. Fantastic. And Jerry's about to join us.
Can't wait for that. If you missed any of the first two hours, less need of the Rams GM, head coaches of the Ravens and Patriots, John Harbaugh and Gerard may have joined us back to back last hour. We were here as soon as this hour is over. Before we get to Jerry, though, we got to talk about this. You know, the new kickoff rule where basically the kickers by himself on his side of the field and the kick returning team lines up en masse, just 10 yards apart from the kick covering team, which stands on the 35 yard line. And and the kick returning team stands on the 25. They're 10 yards apart. They can't move until the ball enters the kicking area, which is 20 yards in and two guys are standing back there. And all you got to do is just get through the initial sort of Braveheart line and off you go. Oh, there's only a kicker back there.
So it's going to create a lot of ideas and creative ideas. Jalen Warren of the Pittsburgh Steelers organization running back very speedy. He could be one of the guys back there. Who knows? Why not? Because all you got to do is just create open space for him. And he's he gone.
He he let loose of this particular interesting idea. They're ideating in Pittsburgh. Roll it. Do you think the kickoff rules will make you want to maybe kick return this year at all? Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
They don't. Your kickoff return? I guess not. They I know we want to win. No, don't go back there. I mean, I would.
I think it's pretty cool. As soon as you touch the ball, that's when everything, you know, starts to happen. But our offensive or our special teams coordinator was talking about Justin Fields being back there. We're like, hold on, hold on. Oh, you breaking news already?
We looked at him like Justin Fields got to beat that back there. And, you know, it's I don't know. I think it's I think it's cool.
Say what now? If that's a flagpole and it's being run up, you know, we'll probably take that flag right down and rip the flagpole out and hit you over the head with it is Mike Tomlin. I imagine. Right. Justin Fields probably wants no part of that.
I don't know about that. Justin Fields could score. But Justin Fields would like to score touchdowns. He wants to get on the field for the Pittsburgh Steelers. I just don't think I just don't think Justin Fields thought as the long time and potential future quarterback at Chicago Bears.
I want to go to Pittsburgh and beat Devin Hester. Right. You know, and there is a long standing tradition in the National Football League of head scratching special teams players being special teams players. Gronk being one on a special teams extra point.
Broke as I will. Yeah. But if you're the special teams coordinator, great idea. Nice try.
Just start out there. Nice try. Justin Fields would be a very good returner.
You know, if he wasn't your quarterback or one heartbeat away from being your quarterback. Because it's high on my damn agenda. I don't know if it is on his agenda.
Black and gold. Here we go. Thank you, though, Jalen Warren for that piece of information. All right.
So just wanted to get that out there before we throw it to break. Very early first segment here, because we've got Jerry Seinfeld coming out here unfrosted on Netflix right here on Roku, starting Friday. But Jerry Seinfeld on the Roku channel and the station next Battle Creek, Michigan, 1963 Kellogg's and Post sworn cereal rivals race to create a pastry that will change the face of breakfast forever. A wildly imaginative tale of ambition, betrayal and menacing milkmen sweetened with artificial ingredients.
Unfrosted stars Jerry Seinfeld in his directorial film debut. It features a supporting cast of comedy greats, including Melissa McCarthy, Jim Gaffigan, Hugh Grant, Amy Schumer, Max Greenfield, Christian Slater, Sarah Cooper, Bill Burr, and many more tomorrow on Netflix. What's up, everyone? It's reality Steve, your number one source for all things Bachelor Nation and reality TV. Every day I'm giving you the behind the scenes juice and your info on all your Bachelor Nation stories and also interviewing some of your favorite reality stars.
My name has been synonymous with spoilers, but I'm so much more than that. Give me a listen. The reality Steve podcast, part of the believe network.
Just search BLEAV on YouTube or wherever you listen. Back here on the Rich Eisen show, we're thrilled to have here. Radio audience is gone.
It's the Roku channel feed where we normally just show a clip, which we'll do right here with Jerry Seinfeld. Good to see you, sir. How are you? Good to see you, Rich. Great to be. I was just thank you.
Thank you. I love when off camera people respond. And that's that's what they do here is they respond. Yeah, they do.
So I mean, I got to start with the set, which you don't want to start with a clip. No. OK, no. OK, fine. OK, so I'm trying to reach my coffee here. Yes. No one ever thought, why don't we make that work better? Sort of.
But the big thing, Rich, and you got to tell me. Yes, sir. Are you aware of the difference in our how we're sitting as we are relating?
Do you feel because when I watch the show, this is what I go. Why? Why is he doing this? Why have you set yourself up like King Tutankhamen and your guests? Why am I it's not that much of a discrepancy is it's called a riser. It's called a riser. Yeah. Put the chairs on a riser. Well, remember how Letterman would do it, which is right next to you, right?
It's no, but he would always have a height advantage. It was weird. This is what I was told when I was actually when I started doing the show. And I swear to God, it was from somebody put me in touch with him, who's a and you probably know Steve Moscow from back. Of course, I know Steve. Right. For years. Close buddy. He put me in touch with Gary Shanley. Yeah.
Who told me to do this? Literally get higher and get closer. OK. That's what he said. Yeah.
Let's let's just try something. You want to switch? No, no, no. You saw where you are. All right. Yeah, I can't stand there. Yeah.
We're back on the Rich Johnson Show Radio Network. I feel intimidated. I'm not going to lie. Why? Because you're standing over me.
Yeah, well, but I'm not I'm a nice guy. I mean, I'm right. It's a little weird. And we want to what we want on this show. Yes.
To get a comfortable, a casual. Yeah. Back and forth. Yeah.
Someone who we're happy to have on the show. Yes. Right. That's what we want. I think that's all we're achieving that slowly. But surely I feel like we're having that here. Yeah. Right. But no, I'm such a fan of the show that I cannot try and fix things.
Well, I appreciate that. So is it real? Am I that appreciably higher right now? Would you say if it was my show, if I was if I had your gig? Yes.
What I would be wanting to do is I want to get as much as I can get. Yes. From whoever comes on. Yes. Right. That's what I would be thinking. That's exactly what I think. OK. And this is counterproductive.
You'd say spatially. I really made as good a case as I could. Hold on a minute. Let me see if I can just. All right.
Just better. If I'm a little bit lower, the desk is too big. It's the desk. Are you working here? What do you need this gigantic glass desk?
What are you doing? I do have sometimes I have notes. I've cleared the desk because I only have notes for you. Like I've got these cards, you know, spatially.
How much room do we need for those? Oh, my gosh. That is funny. Jerry Seinfeld here on the Rich Eisen Show. What made you last chance to watch this set? It'll be different on the next episode. I agree.
I agree. What made you create a movie about the race to create the pop tarts? Well, the in your nice promo you did for us in last night's show. Yes.
Well, whenever this is on. Yes. You talked about you were wondering if it really happened, if there really was a race between Post and Kellogg's. And there was the one true element.
There's a couple of true elements in the show. One is Post really did invent it first. Yes. Kellogg's did hear about it right before it was about to hit the shelves and race to come out with the same thing or a better thing at the same time.
Yes. So that really did happen. And Post really did the box in the movie is the real box that Post came up with the country square with this lame granny doily look.
And Kellogg's came up with the pop tart and they stole from Andy Warhol, who had just invented pop art. That's that's really it. That is true.
There was no gunplay like we had. So we we take we we we take comedic liberty from there. Right. But those are the two elements that are true that are absolutely, in fact, happen. And then you just extrapolate from.
We just found it so funny. Gigantic serial companies in a little town in Michigan. Yes.
Battle Creek. You could just see comedically. That's that's a good place to start. Right.
And then you put Hugh Grant in a Tony the Tiger outfit and let it all roll pretty much after you're after the race. That's particularly funny in this. And just the number of comedians that you have and the I know number of cameos that there are. Yes, it just was one after another. I was amazing. It was fun for a long time.
We didn't have anybody. What do you mean for a long time was me and Gaffigan. And we had a room where we were casting the the the project.
Yeah. And on every and it was a three by five card with which with each character's name. It was like 30 characters. And there was nothing under any of it was just me and Gaffigan. And the time is clicking now. Six weeks to shooting, four weeks to shooting. And I didn't have anybody.
And I don't know. Then then Hugh Grant said, I want to be Tony the Tiger. And the next thing I knew, everybody else wanted to be in the movie. He was the he was the dam breaking. I think he was. Yeah. Yeah. He plays a British actor who is looking for his Shakespearean breakout moment inside a thorough Ravenscroft.
Oh, my gosh. I also noticed the name Rick Ludwin in there. He was the guy who helped create Seinfeld.
Did he or were he put in green? He greenlit it for and Rick was the only person at NBC that saw the pilot and thought the show wasn't bad. Everybody else did not like it. What do you mean?
Seriously? You walked in there and you was it truly a pitch about a show, about nothing when you know, no, no, no, never. What was the original pitch like? The original pitch was how a comedian gets his material, which Larry and I knew we were lying when we said it, because nobody wants to see that. It's not interesting. But it sounds good to a network executive.
Right. So they gave us a pilot. They didn't like the pilot. And then Rick Ludwin said, You know what?
I think this show isn't that bad. Everyone disliked it. And Rick Ludwin said, I'm going to take some money from Saturday night wrestling. In those days, professional wrestling replaced Saturday Night Live once a month. And he took the money from one of those. And it was enough money for us to make four episodes. We made four episodes. They still didn't like it. And then Fox said, We want the show. And then NBC said, OK, we'll make a few more.
They still wouldn't order it. They just didn't like it. So which episode turned the tide? Was there one in particular that turned the tide?
No, no. But when they put it after Cheers, we got ratings. And then they put us on Wednesday night. And again, we went in the toilet again.
We we we had a long it was four years of struggle, which, you know, we didn't really care. We were just having fun doing the show. When did you meet Larry David for the first time? I met Larry David probably 1975. He was a comic. I was just starting. And you were doing a set together, is that what it was? Sure. Comedians do shows.
Yes, we go to we go to clubs and do shows on stage. See, you threw me off by making me lower my seat, Jerry. It's not the seat. The whole thing has to go the whole thing.
The desk has to go. And you can't really. Here's the other thing you can't do. Yes. And we know this from Shark Tank. Yes. When you have a hit, as you have and deserve.
Yes. And it will be a long running staple. You're going to have a great life because you're great on TV. You're great at everything. Sports. You're sports. You're the sports comforter. Was that on the air when I was saying that?
It was not. OK, you're the sports comforter. You make us feel good.
Just being with you feels good. OK, thank you. And I watch the show. But once you have a hit in show business, here's what we do. OK. Nothing. We do nothing. Shark Tank.
You ever see them change that set? Not at all. Never touch it. Don't touch it, because in show business, we don't really know why people like anything. So when they do like something, don't touch it. Don't touch it. Don't touch it. I have jokes in my set.
I have no idea what they're laughing at. I don't touch them because whatever they like, if you like it. That's why I'm going to do it. Sure. OK, I do a line in my set.
It's one of the most interesting lines to me. You want to get into some comedy stuff, please? Always. So I you know, I have like all my regular stuff, and then I a big part of my set now is the wife and kids, as every comedian must do. Mm hmm. And I talk about having kids. I go, I was there at the birth of all three of my kids, obviously one of the most dramatic moments. It always gets that it's just I'm standing in front of 3000 people, four of them will react every night.
That's it. Two thousand nine hundred and ninety six do not. But that laugh, which is the exact percentage. So what do we got here about you're about seven people like ten. I said there was one out of ten. OK, so I got a C minus laugh from one guy. It's the exact same percentage.
Congratulations to TJ. Yeah, you're the guy. Now that to me as a comedy scientist, I am fascinating. So you don't touch it or you. Why would I touch that? I just do it. First of all, it's getting me to where I want to go. I want to talk about having kids.
Yes. But that's my first line. I was there for the birth of all three of my kids, obviously one of the most dramatic moments and it gets a tiny little ripple. It's the person who doesn't have a kid who's laughing.
He doesn't have a kid. It doesn't matter. I don't know what it is, but we don't touch lines that work.
We don't change sets that work. I would put a riser under these two chairs, put the riser under the chairs. That's it. But don't touch anything smaller. Make the desk smaller. You can't you can't. OK, you got to hit show here, Rich. You got to just leave it. You got to leave it.
Unfortunately, everything I have said, you have to disregard except for the riser. These these are club chairs. This is for you and me to have a cigar later. OK. Do you smoke cigars? I don't. Let's start. OK. We have a few minutes.
You would be a great guy. Wouldn't he be a great guy to have a cigar with? Oh, the greatest. But, you know, when you just start, though, you can get, you know, sick from it. Right.
Don't you have a problem with it? Oh, thank you. Oh, I mean, that's the last thing I want to do is like, just do the wrong thing.
Inhale and then dry heave in front of you. Jerry, I don't like I don't want to do that sort of thing. No, you'd have to give me a quick primer on it. I can. OK, very good. Jerry Seinfeld here on The Rich Eisen Show, The Rich Eisen Show.
All right. God, would you ever have thought? No. When you first sat down on ESPN Sports Center, sitting there. Who were you across from? Olbermann? No, Stuart Scott, mostly. Oh, you guys are great. We had a blast, man. The greatest. The greatest. We had a blast and it was on after Dan and Keith.
That's so Dan and Keith would do the 11 o'clock and then we would do the 2 a.m. in the middle of the night. And I was having the time. Yeah. And you had the little wisp.
Oh, yeah. Don't don't we miss miss them? Oh, we miss the wisp. We miss the wisp. Our eyes and fans, eyes and nation.
Oh, God, this is the way we miss the wisp there. You're not you're not lying about that. Yeah. No, there are times when I look at my kids and I'm like, let's let's hang on for that or I'm having a haircut and somebody goes, let's speak of don't touch it. Yeah, they're like, let me get that one in the front. I'm like, no, no, we do not. That's the front lines.
We don't we don't purposely attack our own in the front lines. No, leave it, you know. And when Larry David is on this show, my God, it's the greatest show. I said to Larry, when he I think he did you, you when he was doing the run for the last curb, right? Yes. And I said to Larry and isn't so obvious these TV people, these executives, these television executives are so stupid.
That is a show. Larry just. He doesn't need anything.
No, he doesn't need anything. Just Larry talking about what is bothering him is the greatest TV show, right? Yes. And the sports thing.
He's phenomenal at sports. He doesn't want to talk about curb when he comes on. Right. He wants to he wants to talk about what upsets him. Yeah.
What we wants to get off his chest about something in sports. Yes. And then to be sit back, sit back and play judge and jury about. I know what's right or wrong. Nobody's better at it.
No, nobody. And I want him to do that as his next show. We don't need the actors.
We don't need stories. So it's just him sitting like Howard Biel at a desk or something like that with you. I really like him with you.
He's great with you. All right. I'll I'll I'll pilot that thing. It's what I'll do it.
Yeah, I'd love to. Yeah. He doesn't want to do anything.
He doesn't want to drive anywhere. And he said once I brought up I brought so I brought up destination weddings to him one time. And and because the thing argument I have with my wife every now and then is when we go to a destination wedding and she's like, let's get a gift. Right. And I said, no, no, no, no. Like, what do you mean? Let's get a gift. Right. Going like.
My presence is my presence. Yeah. Of going and no, no, we've got to get one on top of it.
No. His his response was he would just don't even go. Yeah, I know.
That's a beach ball on a tea to Larry Davis. Yeah. Especially asked him, what's the distance from his house that he would consider a destination when he said an hour and a half by car? You don't. Yeah, yeah. But aren't you the same way? Of course.
Right. People think Larry and I are like yin and yang. We're identical. I just seem different.
We seem like we're different types, but we're not. But you are. So are you the same way about reclining in a chair in an airplane? The same about everything.
But you have a problem with somebody reclining a chair into you in an airplane. Oh, yeah. OK. Thank you. All right.
Let me see if I can run through some of these. I have a problem with this thing being here. But my hand when I go to the cup, I have to negotiate. So it would be this.
It would be better if it comes. Johnny Carson never had this on the Tonight Show. On the Tonight Show?
What the hell is this? Well, we're simulcast on the radio. So this is a radio mic. We don't we can't we can't just love you. It doesn't sound great. I mean, if you want to know this, tell it to every other of the 60 shows I have done this week that all love me and it was sounded perfect. Did it really? Of course. But this is a radio show, though.
How many of them were simulcast on the radio? I don't even know what that means. And I'm exhausted. Oh, my gosh. Jerry Seinfeld here on the program. All right. I got it. I have a couple of questions for you from from your back in your day with Seinfeld, if you don't mind. Sure.
The Keith Hernandez episode. Oh, yeah. How was that born?
How did that get born? Well, the idea was who would be the ultimate catch for me that we could do this story of Jerry trying to seduce, for lack of a better word, or inculcate? Yes.
Maybe that's not a good word for a sports simulcast show. Please drop it. Go for it, Kate. What word would you pick? Me wanting to be with a someone I idolize or heroize or something.
Yes. And for me, you know, being a Mets fan, as you are, Keith in nineteen ninety, we were only a few years removed from eighty six. And Keith was my idol.
He was my hero. And so I love the way he would captain the infield. You know, he was such a great team captain, wasn't he?
Wasn't he the captain supposed to be? I mean, you had Gary Carter behind home plate. Yeah. Yeah. And then, of course, you had the pitching staff. Yeah.
Keith Hernandez coming from the Cardinals has really helped along with Carter from the Expos kind of put it all together. Yeah, put it together. Exactly. So you reached out to him and you pitched him and he was fine with it. I don't remember.
I remember we suggested him always handsome. And I, you know. We sent him the script and he said, yes, he, of course, had no idea what he was saying yes to none. And that was the only day on the series that I worked on the series that before I drove in in my closet, I changed my shirt twice. Wow.
Thinking, no paint, not paint, no blue, no. Just to make sure. It was like a big date.
I was so excited to meet him. So it was true to form the script. Yes, it was true. It was true.
You would have helped him move if he had asked. Yes. Yes. OK. Yeah.
He was my man crush. That's what they call it, right? Yes. Yeah.
That's what they call it. Yeah, for sure. And so and I still love the guy, by the way, absolutely love. Well, he's amazing on the broadcast. That's one of the best local broadcasts, if for lack of a better phrase, with Gary Cohn and him and Ron Darling are just they're they're fantastic. Yeah, I had a here's a question for you that a Mets fan said to me the other day. Yes. Would you trade that booth for a world series? And he said, absolutely not. Absolutely not, because that's three hours of entertainment nightly for me. Yes. Rich Eisen, I put it to you. Would you trade the booth for a world series when you're asking somebody who puts a roof over their head to talk because I would never trade?
No, of course not. No, you value the booth. You value the announcer. The broadcasters are worth are worth gold medals.
That's a Olympic gold medal. What we have there would be me like asking you if comedians are valuable. You know. Oh, you see what I'm saying? No, I don't. But it's my livelihood. I will always I will always back up the play of the the announcer.
I will always do that. Yeah, I was saying to somebody, the three people that I've seen that really have it made. Yes. Sports announcers, the wine guys in restaurants that are out of their minds. Yeah. And pilots.
Pilots are the happiest people. They there's a few people in life. Yes. That are not looking like, how do you get that job?
Well, I'm OK doing this, but I really love to do that. Right. You've got one of those jobs.
You're not looking around going, boy, I wish I was right. Dot dot. Right.
Correct. Same with now. I can't put I can't put stand up comedians in that category. Really stand up comedians.
Now they're always going as a sitcom movie part. It's always something else. Always something else.
Gotcha. What pilot, though? OK, pilots. Do you ever talk to pilots?
Not particularly. Yeah, I talk to them all the time. And they just let me fly this plane. That's all I want to do. That's all I want to do.
What do you want to do? You don't talk to them while they're flying, right? No, not when there's less, but I've met them. OK. You're talking to one of the very few stand up comedians that never wanted ever to do anything else. Everything else I've done, including this movie, which was a lot of fun to do. Yes, I didn't want to do it. Not even your sitcom, but one of the greatest sitcoms of all time. Oh, thank you, Rich. It's the truth.
That's nice. Didn't want to do it. Larry didn't either. You could have. Come on. I'm telling you. Come on. I mean, people walk.
Jerry, you know that people walk around and use lines, even even when I have a pretzel and they're making me thirsty. I mean, I seriously made my life a dream. But it's I just I didn't want to do it. I don't know why I work so hard to do it.
But I tried pushing, yeah, pushing NBC to please give us a chance. I don't know, it seemed like the right thing to do, but being a stand up comic is really fun. I would find that tougher. I did stand up comedy in college. Really? Yes. For four years, I did it.
And it's four years. Yes, I did. You know, once I was with the West, the West was funny. I was funnier with the West. And tell me what happened.
I just I don't know. I was just it's the toughest thing I've ever had to do. I did it in student in the student union.
So I, you know, I would pack the house. So I knew that the crowd was friendly. Couple of times I actually went on the road to see what it would be like. It was the toughest thing I ever had to do was in front of 20 people.
I was paid a hamburger. And most of the comedians afterwards were like, are you going to use that? Meaning the joke that I just used, if I'm not going to use it anymore. Yeah. And it was it just struck me as kind of a cutthroat.
And I don't know if I was cut out for it to be straight. Cutthroat isn't the right word. I would call it animalistic. It is an animalistic existence.
What's the difference? Cutthroat is someone else sabotaging you. OK. Animalistic means you have to be cretinous. You have to be a ground dweller. You have to be a you know, that thing they do in the army with the wires and you crawl under it. Sure. Yeah.
If you're doing that and go and this is kind of fun, you could do stand up comedy. If you think this is kind of fun crawling under these wires. Right.
That you have to have that gear of. I kind of like I still like the fact I did a show recently in a town I'm not going to name. And I wasn't good. I was struggling. Right. I just knew this is not the kind of this is not working tonight.
It's just OK. I'm getting I'm getting like decent laughs and they're paying a lot of money and I'm not destroying them. And I was sweating, you know, and I feel that bead going down the middle of my spine. You don't feel that when you do a sitcom or a talk show.
You feel that when you're doing an hour and 20 minutes of stand up in a small town. And you like that? I like that.
I like that. And I turn around and I take a sip of water. Do you did you ever see Lenny with Lenny Bruce? No, but I know who you're talking about. Yeah, it's a Dustin Hoffman movie from the early 70s. And the top the top of the movie is he's playing a strip club and he's got the tux on and he's bombing and he turns around to the band.
He's getting a sip of water and he just says to the band, it's granite out there. That's when I saw that when I was 18. That's I said, that's the life I want. Damn, Jerry. Yeah, OK. So that's how you got to be built to survive the early years of stand up.
You have to be armadillo ish. I have a couple of questions for you. OK, my first.
How great was that, by the way? But the finale? Yeah.
OK. That's definitely one of the things I want to talk with you about. But before you get to that in the in the Seinfeld reunion season. There's a scene where we know where the season of curb, where you come back.
Oh, wherever he's come that season. Right. That was a while ago. Right. Yeah.
A while ago. Yeah. There's a scene and we can't tell the joke again. No, but Einstein comes up to you.
Your question is, what did you know? Was that a real laugh? Was I really hearing that joke for the first time?
That's my question. Yes, it was. Yes.
Amazing. Yes. You had no idea when you did you know he was going to approach you? Is that at least in the script that? Yes, Bob is going to come up to you and tell a joke. Did Larry know what the joke was that was coming up? I think so, because you could see how unhappy he is. OK, he doesn't like that joke in real life, in real life. No, he doesn't like it. He didn't want Bob to do it in real life, in real life. So he's playing something in real life. Larry and I do not act as a fresh reminder.
Yes. OK. You know why? There's no money in it for us.
We're not good at it. That said, that said, he comes up to you and he starts telling this joke and you'd never heard it before. And you never heard the joke before. By the way, the beauty of the telling at the way Einstein crafts that joke. Yes. Everything but the end of that joke.
Even the end. It's a great Bob Einstein joke because this is the most filthy, profane talk about a ground dweller. Bob Einstein is just he is a filthy animal of a person. But the greatest thing in life and I love Bob and I miss Bob so much because we after and I had never met him before.
Really. And I loved him my whole life. Officer Judy's Smothers Brothers. I don't know if you go back that far. Yeah, yeah.
1969. So I got to meet him and I fell in love with him instantly. And so when the day after any big award show, you get on the phone with Bob Einstein and the profanity and viciousness of he would tear apart every person that won or lost or everything on that show.
The greatest show ever was Bob Einstein the morning after the Oscars, Golden Globes, Emmys, any of that. And you got there after you met him. I would call him always the night I would we would talk every other day. Well, he had you at hello and that with that joke. Oh, yeah, yeah. Oh, my gosh. Just so your reaction throughout the whole thing where you're reacting to the opening line to use that word. Yeah.
OK. And then and then the very end. Yeah. You had not heard it before.
I think we did it another time, OK, but they used the first time because I didn't know the the end of the joke. I didn't know the yeah. So you and your reaction. So that was real. Yeah, that was real. Fantastic.
Yeah. What did you think of the finale of The Curb Finale? I loved it. I drove home that night. That scene we shot shot with me and Larry in the jail cell was after 11 pushing midnight that night. We were all wiped out and we hit on that idea. Me, Larry and Schaeffer, who is the director, and we hit on. Why don't we do a bit about the Seinfeld finale, how this is what we should have done. And the three of us looked at each other like we had just tripped over bar gold.
Remember Bania? That's gold, Jerry Gold. That was that was the moment, you know, and we were talking all day about series finales and we suddenly realized and we knew that people did not love the series finale of Seinfeld. We knew that. And we realized, oh, my God, we're going to change it right now. And we did it.
And I thought it worked. I thought it was funny and interesting and clever to connect the two series at the end of Larry, David and I's television series life. You know, yeah, at the end, we reconnect the whole thing. Two shows of two guys who were partners 25 years apart, both playing themselves.
The math of all that. It comes together in the end and we realized we went from worse to something really great. I'm getting the chills just talking about it, it was it was it was a chill. It was a chill. I thought, holy.
Holy, you know what? Yeah, we just it just landed in our laps and that again, because it was apparent throughout the entire episode that this what it was looked like it was heading towards. Yes, but the same with the same courtroom scenes of people from the past pointing out your awful behavior that we've been spending our entire lives laughing at. Yes, but you know that you just came up with that.
We didn't have that when when Kramer is hitting golf balls at the beach and George is dating this girl pretending to be a marine biologist and walking on the beach and then saves a whale on the beach. We're shooting the episode, OK? We're shooting it. I don't know the schedule that week, but let's say we're shooting it on Wednesday. It's Tuesday. We don't have the golf ball goes into the blowhole of the whale.
We don't have it. You don't know was never in the script. It was the night before. It was the night before we shot the scene with Jason in the in the coffee shop. I said to Larry, hey, what if what puts the whale in distress is Kramer's golf ball? He's hitting golf balls at the beach.
George is walking on the beach with the girl. We haven't connected them. We saw no connection the night before. We write that speech the night before two o'clock in the morning. But the sea was angry.
The sea was angry that day, my friend. We show up the next day. We hand Jason, who's a effing genius, we hand Jason that speech. How long is that speech? It's a page, two pages.
Yes. You walk up. This is TV. OK, this is why film sucks.
You walk to up to a TV actor like Jason and you hand him two and a half pages. And I go, we've got to shoot this in a half hour, memorize it. He goes, no problem. That's TV, that's TV, that line.
No, no preciousness. Oh, and he when I here's here's I got a nugget for you, please. So when Jason is doing the speech, there's one shot.
There's one cut to me with my eyes, my eyebrows. I'm watching him. You think I'm reacting to the story? I'm reacting. I can't believe he's getting this speech word. Perfect.
That is what I'm thinking. I'm not even in the scene. I'm not acting. I'm just watching Jason get the speech right in front of a live audience.
OK, it's not film and film movies. You screw it up and we'll do it again. Yeah. In TV, this live audience is going to hear this speech for the first time once.
Once. So you want those juicy laughs. They're hearing these jokes the first time and he's getting it perfect. That is why I have that look on my face.
I said easy, big fella. Yeah. I'm like, it's like an old man returning to back in the deli. Yeah.
And how Jewish is that joke? Brilliant. And then but but then the ultimate the ultimate is the cherry on top of Kramer saying, is it a titleist? As if it could be someone else's golf ball that got put into the blowhole. Well, that's a golfer, right? Yes, that's a golf. It was a golf aficionado question.
Like it could be someone else's golf ball. Yeah. And we might as well. Yeah, the title is to going up the chain at Titleist that morning, getting someone at Titleist sign to let us say Titleist. Oh, wow. You have to do that. I did not do that in Unfrosted, by the way.
There was no call to Kellogg's. No, let's go to court. I want to be on the stand on pop-tart charges. There's a lot of exhibits to be had in this movie, that's for sure. But you got some good stuff here.
There's a couple of things I've never said publicly before. Fantastic. Yeah, that's good stuff.
Well, I appreciate that. Yeah, the Titleist thing we were biting our nails is Titleist. It has to be Titleist.
It's the funny golf ball. Yes, it has to be. Yeah. No other brand is as funny as Titleist.
Yeah, right. That's like the Sunshine Boys, like words that they're funny with K's in it, right? Like, you know, I know there's no K in Titleist, but there's certain words that are funnier. Titleist is funnier.
And then the call comes in. Titleist is cool. Titleist is cool. And Larry and I are just like, yes. Another line as well.
I mean, I could go on for days here. Few minutes we have left with Jerry Seinfeld here. Another button line that's as genius button line as I've ever heard is you delivering and you want to be my late tech salesman at the end of the where where the Vandalay industries. You don't remember this part? Well, of course, I remember it.
But I'm going to ask you, do you like that better than I can't be with someone if I don't respect what they do? And I say to the woman, you're a cashier. Does that beat you're a cashier?
I'm telling you, you're a cashier. Got me that series. Do you think so? Yeah. That line. That line.
The crush on that laugh was so big. You know, by the way, speaking of old Jewish stuff, what the hell is a cashier? Right now, even in eighty nine that that word was over. But we do. That's again, case out. We're not saying check out. We're not saying you work in sales cashier.
You're a cashier. One funny word with a K start. That's that's that's comedy touch. That's that's that's goes over the goal line. That's like the Sunshine Boys, which is a movie you have to see, Chris.
I'm sure I haven't seen it. But you want to be my latex salesman. He's got his pants down. He's running out for the bathroom. Save and delay industry.
Save and delay because it's his gambit of trying to. I don't love the line as much as as much as door opens punch line. Right. Door opens punch line is that that's a comedy heaven. Every comedian dreams of doing that in their life once.
Right. I want to swing a door open and drop a line that's a punch line. The line is a good line. OK, it's not my favorite. So then what is your favorite?
Do you have one? Oh, clearly you you. Wow. You got me there. What is my favorite line I ever delivered on this TV series or or what? Yeah, that you ever delivered on the TV series.
I do think I do think you're a cashier. I felt like I felt like a halfback when you get make the edge. And now I'm going upfield.
OK, that and that was one of the first or second episodes. And I was very uncomfortable acting. We were uncomfortable doing everything. We didn't know what we were doing.
Larry and I learned to write stories, dialogue, scenes, scenes, act breaks, the whole racket. We didn't know anything. So in that moment, I felt like we just turned the corner because, you know, you just that that we just barreled up. We just barreled that one, you know. And the last one for you, the did the double dip happen to you? No, it did not.
Who did the double? That's one of my favorite lines. Just dip once and end it. That's a great line. That's a great line. Dip once and end it the way you delivered it to.
Yeah, that guy was great. Why is that line funny? Rich Eisen wants to know. It ends a little sooner than you think it will. Because you just dipped once and don't dip again. That's what you think is coming.
But it ends sooner than that. So that's what that's that's where you get that's how you get a laugh. So that did not happen to you.
The double. No, no, no. Was there anything that did anything that did happen to you specifically that you put into this show that that stands out? The car reservation. Did that happen to you personally? Maybe. Maybe, I don't know. You know how to you know how to take the reservation, but you don't know how to.
Yeah, that's the most important part. Yeah, this was a funny. I watched that the other day. I was thinking people love this thing. Why do they like it? Because you're just anybody.
I think it was it was two pens. That's why it was funny, right? This is what I like to do. Why is that funny? Because it's the guy taking reservations with two pens and pads in different locations.
So he's really not paying any attention at all. Fantastic. Oh, my gosh. All right. So we're going to show a clip after you leave, unless you want to stick around for another couple of minutes here.
You know what my favorite line to do on the show was? Well, hold on a second. Hold on to that. By the way, that's what we call a break.
That's a good tease, right? Yeah, we'll be right back to finish up the show with Jerry Seinfeld. Choices and build a better life.
Afford anything wherever you listen. By the way, tonight at the Hollywood Bowl, you, Jim Gaffigan, Nate Breguetzi and Sebastian Maniscalco, who's also in the movie. And so is Jim Gaffigan.
Yes. So, yes, that'll be a fun night. Netflix is a joke comedy festival. I think the Tom Brady roast is part of that this coming weekend as well. Sunday night, Tom Brady roast. Fantastic. So something to do. Well, we'll be there.
I'm going to be there. I love Rose. Jeff Ross is one of my favorite movies on the planet. So funny. Before I let you go, you were just about to say that your favorite line that you said on I think my favorite line was. That's a shame. I love that one, love it, because it was just I don't care when you're eating popcorn. Yeah, it's even better. Yeah, eating popcorn, watching some horrible thing happen to a close friend.
That's a shame. I send that to people all day, all day. As a Michigan fan, whenever Ohio State loses, I will text. Honestly, I send that meme to so many people. Oh, that's funny. So the fact that you say this and what was did you when did the idea of eating the popcorn come in? Because that that is that adds to the nonchalantness of not caring. Yeah, the the condescension, the the disassociation. Yeah. Lack of empathy.
It's all pop. What says lack of empathy more than popcorn? That's a shame. Yeah. Would you ever apologize to your wife while eating popcorn? No, that's not going to work. That's not going to work.
It undercuts it undercuts the sincerity. Yeah. These are the comedy comedy science. You're getting it rich like nobody else. Oh, man, I can't get enough of it. Yeah, it's fun stuff, right? Oh, my God. It's so much fun to take a joke apart. And they're all over Unfrosted, available for streaming tomorrow only on Netflix.
Unfrosted can be seen through Netflix right here on Roku. I cannot thank you enough for coming here. I love you so much.
Thank you for having me on any. Please. I know you don't get out here often enough. I barely scratched the surface. Next time you come, I'll be lowered.
The desk will be smaller and that might be history. Like I've never even seen at your peril. Young man at your peril. Don't touch anything on this show because it's great.
It's working. It's a show business rule. Don't F with show business rules, right? Don't do it.
Don't. OK. No, that's funny. The only other guest that commented on maybe removing anything. Arnold Schwarzenegger came in here. Yeah. Saw this chair. Yeah. Called it a baby chair and removed it.
Got up, removed it, took Chris's chair, sat in his own chair, decided. Is it taller that chair? Yes. Your chair? Yeah. Yeah.
It's a pyre. It's a regular office chair. That is the problem. I mean, it's you can make an adjustment.
It's a it's a four inch, six inch situation. I think you need it. OK. OK, thank you, Jerry.
Again, everyone check out Unfrosted. Netflix is a Joe Comedy Festival tonight in the beautiful Hollywood Bowl. Thanks again for coming on. Thanks. We'll be back to wrap up the show on the Roku channel in a sec. Wherever you listen.
