Illness-Disease-Suffering After Hours

This is Stu Epperson from the Truth Talk Podcast, connecting current events, pop culture, and theology. And we're so grateful for you that you've chosen the Truth Podcast Network.

It's about to start in just a few seconds. Enjoy it, and please share it around with all your friends. Thanks for listening, and thanks for choosing the Truth Podcast Network. This is the Truth Network. Coming to you from an entrenched barricade deep in the heart of central North Carolina, Masculine Journey After Hours, a time to go deeper and be more transparent on the topic covered on this week's broadcast. So sit back and join us on this adventure. The Masculine Journey After Hours starts here now.

Yes, we aren't ready for another Masculine. Because we have Art's topic tonight, or actually, you know, depending on when you're listening, and it could be in the afternoon, it could be in the morning. But we do have Art, and it's great to have him with. We also have Grant back with us and David, all in the same show.

And so it's pretty cool. However, there are several bailers on us. We won't mention any names, but Sam Main and Jim Graham, and who else could we mention? Kenny and... Oh, Danny, yeah.

Kenny and Chuck. Oh, yeah. But we do have Grant, and we have Art.

So Art, what are we artfully talking about tonight? We're talking about how to cope with illness. And this topic came about by me having met a new acquaintance who was diagnosed and going through treatments for throat cancer.

And I told about that earlier, but on the radio show, on the podcast, let me say that I have another friend who has pretty much recovered from throat cancer. He is a friend of mine. He's a dog trainer and breeder, and he is the source of my dogs. One dog came through him, and the other one was actually bred there at his kennels. But he had another dog. It was a puppy, and he looked at this puppy, and it had a little white place. It's a black puppy with a little white place on his chest. And he said to him, that white place looked just like an angel. And he kept that puppy. He thought that was a sign of some sort, and it gave him hope. And it gave him, through his faith and his belief and his hope, he was able to... That helped him get through his episode of cancer. Yeah, hope is sort of an operating idea about this.

And so when I think of hope, I couldn't think of anything more hopeful than Forrest Gump. Right, Sam? Oh, Sam's not here. That would be Andy. No, I think you meant Danny, didn't you? Oh, no, he's not here either. Yeah, this is Sam special, definitely for Sam. Too bad he's not here to enjoy it.

That's true. So this is from Forrest Gump, and it's when Forrest finds out his mother is dying. And you know, this whole topic about, you know, those comforting those that are suffering, or how are we to respond as a body of Christ?

How do we handle our own suffering or illness? And but this is from Forrest Gump, and it kind of goes into how Forrest handled it. And, you know, I've talked a little bit about how mom passed this past year. And we'll probably talk about that a little bit, but also kind of her struggle earlier when she had her breast cancer. But you have Forrest finding out. It's funny, you'll hear a splash in this if you haven't seen the movie, when he finds out that she's sick, he just, he's on a boat, and he just dives in, he goes straight for mainland and heads back.

And, you know, they had a really close relationship and just kind of made me think some, you know, some conversations like my mom and I had. So play the clip. Yeah, well, you have to tell him to call him back.

He is indisposed at the moment. Where's mama? She's upstairs. Hi, Forrest. I'll see you tomorrow.

Oh, all right. We sure got you straightened out, didn't we, boy? What's the matter, mama? I'm dying, Forrest.

Come on in, sit down over here. Why are you dying, mama? It's my time. It's just my time. Oh, Nell, don't you be afraid, sweetheart. Death is just a matter of time. You're dying, mama. It's my time. It's just my time.

Oh, Nell, don't you be afraid, sweetheart. Death is just a part of life, something we're all destined to do. I didn't know it, but I was destined to be your mama. I did the best I could.

You did good, mama. Well, when I happen to believe you make your own destiny, you have to do the best with what God gave you. What's my destiny, mom? You're going to have to figure that out for yourself. Life is a box of chocolates, Forrest.

You never know what you're going to get. Mama always had a way of explaining things so I could understand them. I will miss you, Forrest. She had got the cancer and died on a Tuesday. It kind of tears me up, just hearing that. It brings back some of the stuff that I went through. I'm just thinking I told the story at when mom passed around Christmas time, how I was going through. She'd been having heart problems for some time for about six months and then progressively gotten worse and been there, kind of spend the whole weekend with her or all day Saturday before she passed on Monday at the emergency room and all.

But right before that, I'd had my own issues with kidney stones that I think I brought up here. I can remember as bad off as she was, I went back and looked at my text and how she was checking on me, more concerned about me than her own self. That's the way she loved. That's the way that she parented me. 2014, when we found out she had breast cancer, mom was always one that I didn't think she would handle it well, that she would be really scared. She amazed me how she said, okay, you know, with God's help, I'm going to face this. She did. She went through a tough time, but it's unbelievable how God brought her through.

I tell the guys, mom was one that struggled with receiving love, didn't felt like people really rallied around her and stuff. During that time, she began to realize how much the presence and love of God brought her through and how much her friends and the love of her friends. It's kind of like what you were talking about, Rob, about the storm and cleared the air. A lot of air was cleared during that time to where she could really see what people thought about her and how much they cared. That's what these sufferings and stuff that we go through is to be that person, to be that person that brings the comfort of God wherewith we've been comforted.

2 Corinthians 1 that we were talking about earlier. It's hard to go through it. It's part of life.

Like Forrest's mom said, it is part of life, but it can be used properly the way God intended it to be. We can be that comfort to one another as He intended. Yeah, when I listened to that clip, I couldn't help but remember, I do a devotion that assisted living in Mocksville and done it for many, many, many years. One of the first lessons I learned, because you go to these things thinking you're going to help them, but they always end up helping you. Again, if you go visit a nursing home over the years, you're going to find there's a lot of people come and a lot of people go.

They all go with a little different flare to it. This lady that made such an impact on me, her son was actually there at a service that I did today. It was kind of neat. It immediately came to mind. But she had the most beautiful smile and she was actually a beautiful lady and she had a stroke and the whole side of her face dropped. It really broke my heart.

I remember when I saw her for the first time and she could barely talk. I was like, man, I feel so bad. She was like, don't you feel sorry for me? It was just like Forrest's mom.

Don't you feel sorry for me because this is my stage in life and this is part of what happens. And I'm just getting closer to Jesus. And she was excited about the rest of her journey. And I remember seeing that in her heart, this was not a bad thing, that she had lived her life and that now God was bringing her in for a landing, however that looked. And it's a critical understanding of people that live well as they die well.

And your mom did that. And we could see that in our funeral, that all the people that were there and testifying to the way that she lived and even her death in their own way. If you go to a really good funeral, and I love to go to a really good funeral, they clear the air. You'll come away from that going, now I understand why it's better to be in a house of mourning than a house of feasting. So sometimes God has more time for you and he clears the air that way. But there's other times he clears the air with your funeral. And if you were at Big Stu's funeral here a few months ago, no it wasn't that few months, just about a month ago.

Oh my goodness, what an amazing event that was. And so we have the unusual thing where Sam submitted a clip and yet we're nobody to set that up except David is here. Now you see the imagery here of David picking up the ball that's been dropped by Sam. Are you seeing this David?

I am, I'm seeing it. I hope I can peel his shoes even though they're small. Old small shoes, huh? I gotta get them in now because he's gonna listen to the show and next week it's gonna be over for me. So it might be one of those ones where you get a text message like, hey guys, I'm not really feeling well. I don't think I'm gonna make it. No, I talked to Sam earlier and we weren't sure if he was gonna make it or not. And he said if he didn't, I could use this clip. And I typically don't use clips when they're submitted and the person's not here because I've had a couple opportunities to use some clips that I think Andy submitted before when he decided not to show up. And some other ones that will- You have a theme here. Yeah, that will remain nameless. No, that's usually when I'm submitting two or three or four. I have some extras to get out. Yeah, I just don't think he'll remember which one was yours and all that.

Clifford. Yeah. But this is actually from a really good show, Yellowstone, with Kevin Costner and it's on Paramount Plus, I think, or Peacock or something if you want to see it. And I actually just- He asked me if I had ever seen it and I said, yeah. My wife watched it when it all came out on TV when it aired and I just fell asleep during it. And so when it came out on streaming, I binge watched it. Actually, just recently finished it probably in the last month or so.

Been binge watched all five seasons in like two months. But that's not part of the story. So this comes in, this is actually in the very last season, very last episode. This is Monica talking to John Dutton, which is Kevin Costner. And Monica is the daughter-in-law.

He's married to his son that is ultimately the livestock commissioner trying to run the ranch and all this stuff. And she's having a conversation with him where she's thanking him for helping her through the death of a child. So we'll listen to that conversation, how it goes, and then we'll come back and talk about it. John, I want to thank you for what you said to me. It helps me more than you know.

I've leaned on it every day since you said it and every night. You know, I think sometimes God gives us tragedy so we can pass along how we survived it to the next generation that suffers, if that makes any sense. Maybe someday all that knowledge leads to no tragedies at all.

What a world that would be, huh? Yeah, what a world indeed. So I relate to that with, I honestly do think that God puts us through some storms so that way, you know, obviously, you know, our armor gets thicker and we lean into him more, but it gives us the opportunity to, you know, our testimony to be able to help other people through maybe similar situations. I know me personally, situations, I mean, I can probably write a book with all the situations I've been through in my entire life and, you know, not to brag or anything, I think I might be the youngest in the group, so I don't have a lot of years on me, but I'm getting there, you know, and I can't tell you how many times recently and even throughout the last few years that I've found myself talking to, you know, somebody else and they're telling me their story and I'm like, wow, you know, I've been through that, you know, I can totally, you know, one of the biggest things I used to not like is when I'm talking to somebody about a situation I'm going through, whether, you know, whoever it may be, and they're like, yeah, I totally understand what you're going through, but they don't, like, they've never been through it, they've never necessarily stood in the shoes walking the same walk that I'm walking through at that current moment, but when you get the ability to be able to have a conversation with somebody that's struggling with tragedy or an illness or death or depression or any type of mental illness or anything like that, and you can talk to them based off your own experiences and share that with them and help them through that, I mean, that is what I honestly think we were put on earth for. Oh, it's really cool is that, you know, we do a show and then we have a time between shows and between shows, you know, I was listening as David was expounding, you know, second grade, you know, second Corinthians chapter one, verse four, as Andy pointed out that, you know, he had been comforted and not so much he'd been comforted, but his father had been comforted through, you know, a church turning against him.

And so interestingly, his brother-in-law, you know, just to walk him back into that story was going through a similar crisis. Yeah. Yeah. Actually, if you wouldn't mind, and then you had a chance to actually comfort him by a really unusual support setup that I never really have heard a story quite like this, but I think it's exactly what we're talking about because to me, if there was a cancer that I've heard in this particular couple of shows, that was about the worst cancer I've ever heard.

They were going to take him from his job as a pastor because he had sick children that he was dealing with him. Is that right? Yeah.

Yeah. So he, my marriage, my nephews, they have some things going on. And so they're at a children's hospital and have been for, you know, even before he got into this church, they were there off and on.

And probably for like the last eight or nine months, they've been there basically 24 seven living in the Ronald McDonald house and going through treatments and just, I mean, a lot of, some of, one of their issues, the doctors really can't figure out what's going on and they're running tests and trying to figure all this out and do a different treatments to try to figure it out. And so ultimately he followed, you know, scripture, what says minister to your family first, you know, as a husband and a father, just like our father, our spiritual father, God, he's going to minister to us before he might minister to something else and in his own way. So ultimately that's what he was doing. And, you know, unfortunately that, you know, a lot of churches and I'm not, you know, this is my personal opinion. It's not necessarily the masculine journeys or truth networks opinion, but you know, I think there are a lot of churches are politic filled and, and, and, you know, think about the dollar versus more of the congregation and the need to help the pastor and all that stuff. And so we got told about a, you know, a meeting that, you know, quote unquote was not a meeting after a church service coming up. And my wife asked me, you know, instead of going to our church here locally, did, did I want to go up there with her? And I was like, you know, sure. And honestly, I was just like, okay, yeah, I'll go up there.

You know, not even thinking about my past experiences with, with my own father. That's actually a, I say retired minister. He's still preaching at 77 years old. But so we went up there and sat through the service of her brother preaching and, and man, I tell you what, his, his scriptures that he picked and his lesson that they just fell right in line with what we were walking into. And and since I'd been through it before, I kind of knew how it was going to be.

And so they called the meeting after the church after the church and, you know, offered several times for, you know, non-members to, to leave as it was a personal business matter of the church. And of course, if you follow along with the show and have heard some stories that Sam has said, or just listen to our interaction with some of them, y'all probably know how stubborn I can be sometimes. So of course, I was like, no, I'm not going nowhere. I've been through this before. And when I went through it before with, with my own dad, I was only in like seventh or eighth grade. So, you know, I couldn't really speak up at that point. I mean, I wanted to, but, you know, I was in seventh, eighth grade. It was going to take me seriously.

Right. So we sat through it and, you know, he, her brother got to, you know, he started, he wasn't technically, I guess, going to say anything, but, so he, he, he said his piece at the beginning of it. And then they came in and one of the things they kept harping on was the fact that they felt that he was not giving the, the flock or the congregation the attention they needed because they felt that he was elsewhere, obviously with his kids and his wife being up there and his own health issues and everything like that.

And, you know, some of those health issues are caused by the stress he's going on with this currently that we're dealing with on Sunday. And so, you know, I spoke my piece and we asked him because all their bylaws are written based off of scripture and stuff. And so we asked, or I asked and asked him to show me where in scripture the fact that he's taken care of, of his family and being there for them and still coming, preaching on Sundays, Sunday night, you know, not calling out still, you know, doing what he's supposed to do now. Is he able to do everything a hundred percent?

No. I mean, he does have responsibilities with his family because that is scripture to minister to your family first. And, and they couldn't tell me scripture and, and I'm not, you know, most everybody listening to this knows me. I'm, I know scripture and I can pick up the Bible and pull out scripture of what I'm looking for, but I can't recite scripture.

I'm not like Robby and can recite every Psalm in the book, in the Bible, can Robby, but yeah, yeah. Getting there. But, you know, so I'm not really good at that, but, you know, I felt pretty confident in what, what I was speaking then. And, you know, ultimately unfortunately got told to be quiet or I was gonna get escorted out and, you know, and it didn't get as ugly as it could.

Thankfully. The Lord was definitely there. And ultimately, you know, as I, me and her brother talking, he knew this before I even said it before we all went in church. I said, you know, God's going to have you wherever he wants you. And that's with anybody, any of us sitting here, anybody listening to anybody on earth right now, God's going to have you where, where they want you.

And if he doesn't want you there, then I can promise you, he's going to pluck you out of that and put you someplace else. And so we went, they went to a vote. We weren't obviously allowed to vote because I'm not a member. I am allowed to speak because Robert's Rules of Order said anybody in the forum could talk, but they ultimately voted to keep him as, as the minister there, which was great. And, you know, he got a lot of loving and support from the congregation that was there.

They came up crying and hugging him and stuff like that. Whereas, you know, at the beginning of the service, we didn't know which way this was going to go. But, you know, it's always going to go. You just got to, that just was a good learning lesson on my part. You just got to trust God in whichever way we're going, because that's the way you're going to go. But yes, I agree. I didn't, I didn't know going into that, Robby, that that's the direction that, that my day was going to go. In fact, that wasn't even on my mind frame of even that. But as, as we started getting into the meeting and I started seeing, I mean, I'll say, as I started seeing the enemy inside this church and the evil that was coming out of these folks' mouths that call themselves brothers and sisters of Christ, immediately, instantly went right back to where I was at in seventh or eighth grade, watching people stand up in the middle of my dad's sermon, calling him a hypocrite and a liar, and that he shouldn't be standing up there doing it.

I mean, it got so bad that my mom stopped going to church for several months before we moved from where we were at at that time. So yeah, I was glad I was able to there to be a supporter. I love her brother to death. You know, I can, I consider him my brother and we do lots of things together when we're around. But, you know, I was just- And my favorite part of the story, I just got to say, was that this one deacon that apparently was not a young man said that he was going to escort David out of the church. And, and he looked at him like you and what army and, you know, we laughed, several people laughed.

I mean, yeah. But the best part of it is, interestingly, that deacon left, turned in his keys that night, right? That possibly, you know, the trouble left with him and hopefully God will get ahold of him and things will be turned around. But I thought, you know, in his own way, I mean, that's certainly a sickness that obviously if a pastor's got all that, you would think that the congregation would rise to the occasion, be praying with him, helping him every single possible thing, you know. And that was the cool thing is, is members of the congregation were standing up and saying, we should be standing by our pastor during this time.

You know, we, we should be here supporting him and helping him through that. In fact, somebody actually stood up as they were talking about some misvisitation on his part. Cause he was, you know, up there with his kids and stuff like that. They were like, well, who visited him when he was in the hospital for gallbladder surgery? You know, who was there to visit, visit our pastor? You know, I mean, it's, it's a two-way street. And, you know, I mean, I think, I think I'm pretty sure there's a local ministry, energized ministry that that's what they, they do.

They go and relieve the pastor and help, help them through some of these situations. So beautiful. So anyway, Grant, you definitely have something that's on your heart. So sure. In my own opinion, the main topic tonight is love. Oh, there you go.

That's the main topic. I do love that. And there's a little subtle thing that's going on for Sam. He got to endure, you know, first he got to endure a forced gump and then he got to endure David, you know, with his clip. So here we go. And now moving on to John Q go for it. We got Rodney with what time we have left.

Yeah. So John Q is the first thing that jumped into my mind. And this is a movie about a father and wife who have one son. The son has a very bad heart condition, and they're trying to deal with this heart condition and it's, they're struggling, struggling, struggling to get through this and insurance, the hospital's not allowing them to go down the path of getting a heart transplant, which the son needs very desperately. We don't have time to play the clip here, but what ends up happening is through taking the hospital hostage is how he comes through and says, this, I'm going to save my son's life and force a transplant. He gets to the point where he realizes because he had already been through all the tests and everything that his heart is actually capable of being transplanted into his sons. His sons is three times as large as what it's supposed to be.

So they're relatively the same size, which would be the last thing to kind of go through and make sure that would fit and be able to be a possible transplant for his son. And he makes a commitment to that to himself. And one of the big things he tells his son as he's trying to explain to him how he wants to go through life, you know, he's trying to get his son to listen to him as maybe you make a commitment, make it. And he's trying to give this last words of advice because he is, and his mind is about to die himself because he wants to kill himself so that his son can have his heart.

So he's trying to go through that. And it's just a very touching scene. And one of the things he says at the end is I'll never leave you.

I'm always with you right there. And he points to his heart because he knows his heart will be in him. At least that's what he's thinking, which brings up, you know, Matthew 28, you know, with the disciples. He's telling them, you know, I will be there with you always, even till the end of the age. So we're going to go out and we'll be back next week with more Masculine Journey. This is the Truth Network.