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Collateral Damage: Consequences of Bad Decisions

Man Talk / Will Hardy and Roy Jones Jr.
The Truth Network Radio
November 1, 2020 4:00 pm

Collateral Damage: Consequences of Bad Decisions

Man Talk / Will Hardy and Roy Jones Jr.

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November 1, 2020 4:00 pm

Welcome to Man Talk, with your Hosts Will Hardy and Roy Jones Jr. This week's discussion is all about marriage, divorce, and the collateral damage that can stem from bad decisions. The clip used on the show this week comes from the television show "Divorce Court."

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Hey this is Mike Swick from if not for God podcast our show stories of hopelessness turned and I hope your chosen Truth Network podcast is starting in just seconds. Enjoy sharing. But most of all, thank you for listening and for choosing the truth podcast. This is the Truth Network welcome to mannitol. Brought to you by TA W. CM is talking and walking Christian men's ministry where they are devoted to breaking down the walls of race, challenging as our host will Hardy and Roy Jones Junior a black eye and a wide, and I will Hardy and until you were alright it's good to see you too many time we aboveground to play well with you that it's a win-win right aboveground well for you if you if you got the destination plan post boredom.

They added value if it is a win-win. That absolutely right it is good be upright right now with the point of our lives in and 97 continue to work towards getting men off the sidelines. What we talked about. Yes, Mr. Wynn. Right now we know it's just her guys like us can be talk about the kingdom talk about the plan of salvation, encouraging men to step up and also become the minute God intended for them to be absolutely you know in Jesus said the kingdom of God is in you. So we have to present that kingdom to a lost and dying world. Amen.

That's a great point for folks, listen, remember, that's that you may be the only Jesus that someone sees absolutely. How does that look a mess, what were going to talk about today show is a collateral damage.

The consequences of bad decisions. The consequence of bad decisions and I know the wheels are turning their lives. Listen right now it's easy for all of us to meet a guy that was that really really bad decision because concern that's what always say hindsight is 20/20 because you can see what the damage was going to talk to about preventing some of that damage or absolutely anything, you know, Roy. There are people who base they may understand what the consequences are and still go ahead and do it because they don't care like we were kids right you moms don't touch the heart of hearts that burn we had to get burned to give marriage then write what that was about that men typically don't learn lessons too quickly comes to certain areas that will talk about absolutely realist talk about what brought me want on this topic and you as well.

Recently I was talking with some friends that we had that we have a mutual friend who had been married 25 years and they the wife decided that she didn't want to be married, at least on the surface, there was no note was no indication why what's causing it, but what was interesting to watch over to you. Was the collateral damage that occurred this was a this was a Christ believing following couple and that which really swept through everybody the tailwind because it tells them because they didn't understand why. So in this conversation became the collateral damage and that's what we'll talk tonight folks about bad decisions and you when you make these decisions don't just think about yourself typically make these types of decisions it's about me is never about typically is no record of her staff to you. I don't feel good anymore.

I don't not in love with my spouse anymore know how that at that butterfly feeling I want to be a new person I want to go out and do things differently.

This will hear one of our radio clips unit one guess that he liked enjoy the company of others is married with so he didn't want his wife doing the same thing he was doing and and that will talk about that here as well to see Angie and all of times I think when people understand that everything you do say every action you take is in effect yes you know you are affecting all will affect someone else and and asked such. Now you may create a stumbling block for that person.

And as the word of God tells us if we do that, then we ourselves become a stumbling blocks of matter only are we are we putting the stumbling block in front of someone else. As a result of our actions, but we are also a stumbling block to ourselves right will be havoc held accountable absolutely certain that's we talked about that in the past will, I would not want to be the person responsible for causing a brother to lose his or her neck to never find salvation right or sister because of my own behavior and that's why folks we talk about are you the Jesus the people see art should you be a different Jesus.

Jesus is always the same. But if you're playing one side of it and doing things and another we talk about Sunday.

If you look one way on Sunday and then you look totally different. Monday through Saturday. Your causing brothers and sisters to stumble because they don't know which way is up at exactly and this is why James 417 tells us he will know to do good and to do it not, to him it is seen in a man.

So if you if you know you going to cause collateral damage. And yet you go ahead and do it anyway and send the individual suffer the fallout then what you're doing is you causing that Santa be created in someone's right let's talk about the collateral damage will start with the first thing that comes to mind is abuse and that and this could be with your spouse or two children and we know this happens regularly right because her safe houses all over the country and we know that that this physical abuse and mental abuse. What you see is collateral damage and abuse situation was talk from the mental abuse startup first. Well, when you when you are mentally abusing someone and I would say that's that would be the same as verbally abusing them because you are here attacking you know their mental faculties right so when you talk about that.

I believe that the fallout there is a person could have low self-esteem as a result of being bombarded mentally and not being build up by their spouse right in another area to see if that person is being is come the trash in trash out concept it would talk about. You don't listen to stuff don't look at stuff you shouldn't listen to or watching. In this case the person is be in your battered if you will mentally cause of both abuse or mental abuse or verbal abuse and if there that continually is downloaded into their psyche and into their spirit. The mescaline also be the outcome of that person. So if you don't you children folks think about what the men especially speak with with a very gentle tongue speak with gentle heart, so that if they see something different.

This can become the norm.

This can become hardwired into them to say hey this is the way it should be and this is where it is in this way. I'm going to be when I grow up. That's right, because any time in anything up man says to his children.

He's someone see so you going to sow the seed of discord you going to sow the seed of a mental or verbal anguish.

Yes you going to have all of these characteristics that are shaping these children instead of you know speaking positive things into their life right and what is what did Jesus say about the children causing the children to stumble.

That's right well in hand. In Matthew 19 toward around 17, 18 verse. The disciples brought our children to Jesus and the disciples were behind to rebuke them, and Jesus said, suffer the little children, and forbid them not, for such is the kingdom of heaven so so your children are the the byproduct of who you are and so the question is what you should. What are you sowing into them.

Now that's a great great phrase will great question. What man what are you sowing into children, absolutely. And this this should be a Paul's moment right. What are you sowing into true absolutely every sowing hatred.

Are you sure sowing racism are you sowing infidelity. Are you sowing abuse to your wife only seeing these things. How are they seeing you as their father absolutely husband with her mother how they see, and if there seeing you anything other than who you supposed to be a representative representative of the kingdom. If they're looking at you you sowing any other thing into that child's life, then it is not ungodly and it is eventually going to shape character of that child right your hard coding hardwiring with the future that's exactly right. Will this talk about the speak of infidelity It was talk about that word and I want talk about the collateral damage of infidelity and this goes. This could be an all show conversation by itself. So infidelity is what typically drives. That is, things are good at home. I get in a relationship and then somebody gets another person's attention whether still a nice comment and stimulating conversation and all of a sudden this this thing starts to build momentum now. If a person has infidelity in their marriage.

What do you see some of the consequential and some of the collateral damage to well.

If a person is a practicing infidelity and that could be a myriad multitude of reasons behind why that happens but using the example that you said if they are off. You know with a coworker having lunch you know and it's it's becomes a regular thing for them or it's what I call the wandering eye. You know you you might be with your wife or children and you're walking through the mall and then all of a sudden you see a lady with a short skirt, tight pants on short dress and all of a sudden you look but if you look a second time. That's when the enemy gets it right or you stay looking. That's right because because you look different. You know what's there. But if you turn again and you look now you going to start entertaining the stocks was talk about infidelity from on here I sit, it ruins marriage is just collateral damage.

It impacts the children that this is so important folks listen to this. This is so important is a few minutes of satisfaction a few minutes of of the. The excitement of breaking the rules. If you will, and house rules worth the damage that causes two children, or the damage or hurt it causes to spouse and receive answers know in your sow and I know people so we don't know what I'm going to you don't know what's going on. You don't how long this is been going on and how difficult it's been to be in this marriage.

Well, that's the whole point years.

Most people safety valves, for better or for worse folks. There's no reason for to be on the worst side. The majority of the time.

There are counselors out there that can help you through those journeys help you talk to the issues and get to know each other to different level in a deeper level in where there's no threats or no, recourse is basically it is a safe place you go talk and that's when we encourage you to do was talk a little bit more about this also destroys witness destroys your friendships and Satan wins the battle. Satan wins the battle and we elegantly take records.

A few seconds, but the continue to hurt moment will come back when playing a clip about a guy who's justifying why was okay to have an infidelity have infidelity in his life with his wife and and and I when you listen to this. It's it's a little bit hilarious if you know the word of God. But it's also sad that he's attempting to bring his wife to divorce her because she isn't intimately set fine him enough believing that absolutely, so don't go anywhere close to you in your life in Christ as the first dress will be right back to you, CM and would love to have you join their community of men for breakfast every first and third Friday of every month and Bible discussions and fellowship. After the breakfast in town meeting location is in their gracious host church First Christian Church in Cartersville 1130 N. Main St. encouraged him a hard start at 7 o'clock on a hard stop at 8 o'clock. First time visitors eat for free. Join your hose will party a black guy in a white guy affordable chiropractic in High Point. As you might tell from their name, affordable chiropractic, even for the cash. Patient Dr. Jeff Ricky has been caring for patients in High Point for 34 years, physical therapy, such as ultrasound and spinal decompression for disc conditions such as herniation Comprehensive Care for auto accident injury patients with no out-of-pocket expense. Remember, affordable chiropractic on the W. Lexington Ave. in High Point Hall 336-885-1987 men software you survived with us today as it wills considered this clip you folks listen to the equipment will come back and talk about the whole the whole crust is this man's justifying his behavior and then will come back, talk a little bit more detail about what is so's work you specific incidents of cheating but you tell me.

In general, you have the right to have sex with whomever because she's not giving you enough what the individual incidents is when you tell me you have the right to stop. Well, she had a solid. I know I am a person that I like to get out and enjoy myself that I don't mean I will sleep with every woman I meet. I like to compensate. I like to talk you got a problem now put that in man, God will do what I don't know the bottom about a 365 and see this is the problem. The problem here you have this man taking his wife to divorce court so that he can justify having intimate relationships with women that are not his wife. Well in a new cycle. I love them, I love God, but I cared about three conceived by the two, before the show started realistically as I was not reading about it doesn't know God intimately know he does not behave in this way, something anybody can read the word of God, but you don't. You have to have spiritual discernment in order to understand what that word is which means you have to have Jesus in your heart you do any and how it applies to your my second did you notice how many times he said I absolutely I am not going to come in the clip it was always really hilarious was that he just at my needs. I've got a habit and I like to like to talk with folks didn't go visit with communis is rationalized that the thing he he wants to rationalize his behavior because he believed that his behavior is justified and see we can justify anything. Of course the human mind is that Satan's biggest playground justify anything. Anything we can justify the question is, is when he said God put these things in me. He put God put the feeling of intimacy but this intimacy is between husband and wife husband wife exactly not not the illegitimate feelings that you have but you're using God as a reason to go out and have these illegitimate feelings where people say that you were God wants me to be happy. Of course he wants to be happy with that, not at the expense of leaving your spouse or your family for violating his word are violating his work exactly. That's were men and women there to listen with this woman will encourage and challenge here that you know are in the middle situation, seek guidance and counseling intern from this because it said the collateral damage started to show up is immeasurable near Withers Oswald Chambers has a diverse like you I talked about four wheeled the river knows not where source touches writing so that can be a very positive thing very long reaching and very poetic life of the believer that absolutely has to pass their existence, but you talk about when were not standing up writing won't headed home.

What what a great blessing. Another flipper that is the opposite is the if your River is one of evil, or one of of sin in your constantly running down the channel you're sending stuff out and doing things in the collateral damage will be generations to come. Generations to come, that your children and your children's children and grandchildren. Obviously, all down the long great-grandchildren. This could this could set up a the fact that you would never ever know in your life and with Absalom.

So I Think with One Thing Go but to the Clip. The Guy Was Always Talking Multiple Times. He Said I Am Easier. Whatever It Was, so Men We Have Got to Refocus That It's about the First God, Then the Others, Other Than Self. Absolutely. And If If Obviously He Had Read Hebrews 13 for Which Says Marriage Is Honorable in All, a Man and the Bed Undefiled but Horrible Hunger's and Adulterers God Will Judge. So How Can You Justify Just Because You You Using the Fact That He's Not Getting Enough at Home to Justify Sinning against the Holy and Just God. We Know Dr. Chapman Has Book of the Five Love Languages and If You're Listening to This Program Today, We Would Encourage You to Get Hold That Book If You're Struggling Marriage and Struggling Relationship and He's Not Called Ask Us to Make the Plug on This, but We Been through the Book so We Can Tell You about This. You Need to Be Speaking Spouse Is Lovely and I Believe That That's a Go Get the Book. What Each Other's Love Languages so You Can Start Talking to Each Other Absolutely Possible. And from That Leveling Will Come All the Other Blessings in the Fulfillment and the Things That God Intended for Your Marriage to Be You Know When When You Talk about These Door Fulfillment.

You Have To Be Motivated to Do Things for God You Know and but If You If You If You Motivated by God, Then He's Going to Bless Your Work. If You Are Motivated by the World, Then You Are Putting Yourself in a Rut or in a Situation Where You May Not Be Able to Get Out Of. So When I Look at Motivation. I Look at Four Things I Look at Desire.

Look at Determination.

I Look at Fulfillment and I Look at Satisfaction. See You When You Are Satisfied That You Know That God Have Worked in You Because You Have Been Obedient to Him. There Is There Is No Substituting That Adding Another Word in Their Will Should Be Content and Content and Use in Your Circumstances Right and Happy Where You're Because It Nest Everything to Society's First US American, Have You Waited, If You're Not Making Millions Dollars You That You Can't Be Happy You Know That You Just You Don't Measure up Because You're Not in the Top 1% in an Essay. It Is Really Sad Because You Think That the Folks That Are Poverty Level in This Country Are Considered Rich and Most Most Areas of the World Right but That's Because We Built This Mechanism Here That Is Just Commercialized. I Guess We Live so Far Away from Understand What God Intended for All This to Be an and in the Beginning like a Least One We Get down to Divorce When When God, I Mean, the Pharisees Came to Jesus Again in Matthew Chapter 19.3 through 12 Immediately Dates.

They Came to Him and I Said You Know Is It Okay for Me to Put Away My Wife or Just Anything Any Calls at All. And Then Jesus Said Well Don't You Know What the Word Says Let You Nylons LP Late Amount That a Man Leave Father Mother Cleaving to. That Is Why They Shall Be One Flesh and and He Goes on to Discuss That and Then They Come Back and I Say Well Why Did Moses Authorize the Writing of a Divorcement to Put Her Away. This Is What Jesus Said in the Beginning It Was, Not so.

He Said Moses Authorize This Because of the Health of the Hardness of Your Heart. So I Will Harden His Heart so Therefore We're We're Using This Divorce Mechanism If You Will, As an Escape and Say We Have Another Clip That We Got Talk about Later. We Do This Divorce Word Has Become the Secondary to Marriage Your Wealth Didn't Work out for the Sake Don't Want to Be Married on Skin Divorce. Just Bail Folks Its Lifetime Commitment That We Need to Re-Instill in Our Children or Grandchildren into Her Our Friends Contemplating Marriage Is This a Lifetime Commitment. It Is Not Is Never Will Be Perfect.

We Know It's Never Going to Be 100% Purple There Will Be Opportunities and There Will Be Challenges There Will Be Hurdles to Have To Work the Key. There's Work Is like Anything Is like with Metal When You're Tempering Steel Your Ghost of the Heat and Get Stronger and He Gets Multiple Shape Minutes.

When It Comes out. It Is a Finely Tuned Piece of Weaponry in Its or Strengthened in Bridges.

Whatever Happens to Be What Is an Amazing Strength. The Same Thing Happens with Relationships Right or If It's a If You Have To Work for What You Get.

On the Other Side and You Can Appreciate That Much Better If You Don't Put Any Work into It. Any Work, Then You're Not Going to Preach in the Subway with Anything in Life Right Goes Back to That Satisfaction. Yes, Satisfaction and Fulfillment Enough When You Know Your Obedient and You Know That God Has Blessed You Because You Been Obedient. And Lo And Behold, There Is No Substitute for Is Not Was Bareback Will Start That We Talked about Abuse Collateral Damage That Is Talk about Infidelity and in Both of Those Cases If You Stay on Course and Satan Wins the Battle Doesn't When the Work Swing out How It How It Finishes but I Do Know He Does When the Bow Yes He Does in That Battleground Is Your Family from You Should Not Allow Them to Win at No Cost to Not Allow Him to Take Radical Steps. This Take Radical Steps Just like Jesus Said If You're If Your Eye Offends You, Pluck It out, You Know It. If You Hand the Fenske Chop It off and That He Didn't Mean Fully out but What He Meant by That Is to Take Radical Steps. Adults Try to Do Things Always in the Box Right Come out the Box and Take Radical Steps. Whatever It Is You Need to Do within the Guidelines of What God's Word Says and Course You Don't Want to Do Anything Illegitimate or Illegal Stay within the Guidelines and God Will Bless You Know Will Is Is Is and Listen What You're Saying There and Just Wondering about What People Think and Work, Collateral Damage As Part of Me Thinks It Won't Really Talk about Tonight Collateral Damage. It Could Go on and on Vista Drinking and Driving.

Scott Turned out Bad Death Occurred Any Number of Folks First Were Here to Build the Kingdom Secondary to Share with You What That's for My Heart Talk We Don't Take Thing like Every Week I Put Some Thought If You're Listening to This Program You Have Quality Courage Talk to the Father Said I Am a Seven Document Jesus Heart Turn Away from Sin Start to Follow Christ Body Life Will Be so Much More for Field That I Love You Will Be Perfect. Have Struggles That It Will Be a Life It Will Be a Life You'll Be Glad You Absolutely Because There's Only One Who Was Perfect and As Jesus Christ, but He Does When You Receive Him into Your Heart, You Have the Perfect Person in Their As We Wrap up Today Show.

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