Share the Love - Discovering Your Spiritual Love Language, Part 1

Most Christians I meet struggle sharing their faith, often because they assume there's only one right way to do it.

Well, guess what? There's numerous ways to effectively share your faith, and there's one that's made just right for you. Today we're going to look at several different approaches to sharing God's love with the people that you care about.

Don't miss it. Welcome to this Edition of Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. The mission of these daily programs is to intentionally disciple Christians through the Bible teaching of Chip Ingram. And we're in the middle of his helpful series, Share the Love, How to Talk to Anyone About God. In this program, he dispels the myth that there's only one correct way to talk to people about Jesus and reveals that God has given all of us unique gifts to naturally and winsomely share the gospel. Now, this is a message you're going to want to remember, so let me encourage you to download Chip's notes. They contain his outline, scripture references, and crucial fill-ins to help you apply what you hear. Get them under the Broadcasts tab at livingontheedge.org. Tap Listeners.

Tap Fill-in Notes. Well, if you have a Bible handy, go now to 2 Corinthians, Chapter 5, where Chip's talk, Discovering Your Spiritual Love Language. I want you to lean back in your seat. I want you to kind of let your mind, emotions all sort of get geared in one central spot. And I want you to think about what will come into your mind as I say, God loves you. What thoughts come? What emotions?

Honestly. For some, it's like peace, comfort, reassurance. For others, it's a fact. I intellectually believe it, but I don't feel it very much. Or down deep, I don't think He could really love me. I'm unlovable. For others, it's like this sentence, this truth, but it's nebulous.

It's not concrete. You can't get your arms around it. It's okay, He loves me, but I want to experience it. And then there's some of you, that every time you hear, God loves you, there's a response instantaneously of warmth and strength and power and a sense of fortitude that I can face, whatever comes my way, whenever it comes my way, whomever comes my way, circumstances and relationships, because God loves me and is for me.

Who could be against me? That's what I long for in my life, but I think we're all on a journey there. Sometimes we think that it's just an intellectual issue, but often we experience His love the most when we need it the most. King David writes about his experience of God's love.

This is a man who was promised to be king and finds himself dodging spears, hiding in caves and having his life threatened. This is a man that had more opportunity with God, but in a weak moment commits adultery and then gets a contract murder set up and lives with that shame hidden for over a year. But when David wants to talk about what his experience of God's love, it's not vague, it's not nebulous, he writes in Psalm 103, the Lord is compassionate. He's gracious. The Lord's slow to anger. He's abounding, multiplying in steadfast, loyal love.

And he would say in the midst of his failure, he doesn't deal with us according to our sins and doesn't reward us according to our iniquities for. As high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is God's steadfast, loyal and movable love toward those who fear Him. The apostle John, when he was putting his arms around what it means to be loved by God, the last of the apostles on an island in Patmos, all the others had been martyred. Life's been martyred. Persecution has been real.

His life threatened. And he would write in 1 John 4, there is no fear in love because perfect love casts out fear. We love because He first loved us.

When I try and get my arms around God loves Chip, here's the statement that I go over in my mind. God loves you. His love is constant, unconditional, infinite, undeserved and always seeking your highest and best interests.

I personalize that. God's love for me is constant. God never has a bad day. He's never moody.

It's unconditional. He loves you when you've blown it. He loves you when you're doing great.

It's infinite for reasons totally apart from anything you've ever done or ever will do. He has chosen you and you're the object of His affection. You're precious to Him. And He wants to express and always give you the very highest and best. Often He gives us commands we don't like and asks us to do things that are hard and surrender in ways that are difficult out of His love to make sure we get the best in relationships, to make sure we get the best for the future because He's a Father. You're His child and you matter. God's love isn't just passive though.

It turns into traction and action. When you really love someone, you've got to do something. And so the love of God, His love forgives our sin. His love removes our shame. His love heals our wounds and bursts new life.

Out of God's love He provides strength for today and out of His love there's hope for tomorrow. Out of His love He gives you power to change and break addictions and make radical changes because you know you're secure. Because He cares.

Because He won't let you down. And He gives peace to your soul. Sharing the love begins with experiencing it firsthand. At this very moment God deeply passionately loves and wants to help everyone you know. The God that I just described, the God that forgave David of adultery and murder, the God who John would say in the midst of all of life, perfect love casts out fear, that God deeply passionately loves every person you know.

Every person in your family, every person in your neighborhood, every person at work, every person at soccer practice and baseball practice, every person you ride mountain bikes with, every person you do software stuff with. I mean He loves them. He loves them. It's not if, it's at this very moment. So ask yourself how will they know He loves them? Who will show them?

Who will tell them? 2 Corinthians chapter 5 we'll pick it up in verse 17 because that's where most of us have lived. Something radical has happened. We're in Christ. So in verse 17 says therefore if anyone is in Christ he's a new creation.

The old has passed away, the new has come. All this is from God who reconciled us to Himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation. Namely that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself not counting men's trespasses against them and He's committed to us this message. This message of reconciliation. We are therefore Christ's ambassadors.

We're His representatives. We're the bridge between His unfailing, unconditional steadfast loyal love and the people that we know with all the hurts that they have just like us. We are therefore Christ's ambassadors as though God were making His appeal through us. We implore you for Christ's sake be reconciled to God.

God made Him Jesus who knew no sin to be sin or a sin offering so that we in Him might become the very righteousness of God. What I want to talk with you about is how you can become a bridge to eternity. I want to help everyone in this room discover what I call your spiritual love language.

What I can tell you historically and what I can tell you in terms of America is only about one out of ten or two out of ten Christians followers of Christ actively, intentionally and regularly share the love of God with other people and I think there's a reason for that. I think some of us think there's only one way you can do it. The Bible doesn't give us just one way. I'm going to give you six ways from scripture. There's six different love languages and there's none that are better than the others.

But what I want you to know is there's, imagine if you will, like six different kinds of shoes and your foot will fit into a different kind of shoe. There is a natural, normal way that God has made you and prepared for you to share His love with other people. And you don't have to be Billy Graham. You don't have to be Louise Palau. You don't have to be Ann Graham Lotch.

You don't have to be Beth Moore. You can just be you. And there's a way that fits your personality the way God made you in the relationships that you have where you can share His love. And I want to go through them briefly and here's what I want you to do.

I don't want you just to discover your spiritual love language. I want you to walk out of here saying, this week I'm going to take some steps to take this infinite undeserved love that I've experienced and I'm going to pass it on. Okay, so you ready to roll?

Do that again. Are you ready to roll? Okay, get out of pen.

Let's go. Let's look at the six biblical love languages that God gives us and one kind of from church history and culture. Number one is what I call Peter's direct approach. This approach is for those who personally have the spiritual gift of evangelism or often an outgoing, bold personality that can clearly articulate the message of who Jesus is and you can often do this with people that you've never met.

You can boldly, clearly share the gospel, answer questions, do it in a caring and non-pushy way with gentleness and respect and it just seems natural to you. This is Acts chapter two. Peter, despite his personal fears, all these people are now speaking in unknown languages declaring the glory of God and the people say, these people are drunk and Peter says, no, it's nine o'clock in the morning and he steps up and does what he never dreamed he could do and he says, this one whom you crucified is both Lord and Christ and the scripture says they were pierced to the heart, what shall we do? He says, repent and believe in the name of Jesus and 3000 people come to Christ. I don't think Peter ever saw himself doing that but in that moment, it's a direct approach.

It's not just with large groups. Remember Philip? Philip was walking, God said, I want you to go and there's this Ethiopian in the chariot and he's just listening and he says, do you understand what you're saying? And he goes, no, how can I?

He gets up, he's never met him before, clearly directly explains Isaiah 53, 4, 55, the man trusts Christ and a few miles down the road, he's baptized in a pool. There's some of you that are just gifted to clearly boldly talk to people, some that you've never known and sometimes it's an outgoing personality, sometimes it's a spiritual gift of evangelism and sometimes you're an introvert with an unexplained ability and a love in your heart to share directly with people. Unfortunately, this I think has been sold as the way. Everyone needs to be able to do this. I don't think everyone's made to do that. I think this is one very important way but if we, most of us, if we think that's how you have to do it, we think, you know what, I don't think that's for me. As someone wisely or at least astutely observed, there's one thing that those who don't follow Christ and those who do follow Christ have in common. They're both uncomfortable with evangelism. The strengths of this approach are it communicates the gospel directly, concisely, often to lots of people. The weakness is if not done with sensitivity, it can come off pushy and uncaring. There's some people that kind of have this zeal.

You've probably met one or two of them where they're just pushy and over the top and Jesus loves you and you're thinking, he may but boy I don't like you. Right? Been there? So could that be you? On a scale of 1 to 10, okay, every time I want you to actually write down a number. A 1 is I can't possibly imagine ever doing that. A 10 is that's me, oh that's great. A 7 is that's certainly not me but it sounds kind of exciting. I think I'd like to learn. A 3 is if I came upon someone in a car wreck and they were dying, I think I would give it a whirl.

All right? So write down a number and don't write down number 5. Spiritual love language number 2 is Paul's intellectual approach. This is approach for those who like giving logical and reasonable presentations of the faith. They lay out sound explanation. You like to work with concepts and ideas, present a case often somewhat like a lawyer would. You allow the other person to ask questions.

You supply them with answers through your relationship. You tend to like to study science, archeology, prophecy and you find yourself reading books on apologetics. This is Acts 17. The apostle Paul actually is waiting for some of his friends to meet him and early in the book we find out he's getting kind of discouraged and so he's kind of lonely and he's walking around Athens and there's idols everywhere. I mean they got gods for everyone everywhere and here's a god it says to the unknown god. It was kind of like in case we miss one, here's an unknown one and so he goes where the intellectuals hang out to Mars Hill. The Stoics are there and the Epicureans are there and Paul just out of compassion says could I have a word and yes he goes you know I notice you have this monument to the unknown god. I actually know him personally.

Oh really? Yeah, would you like me to tell him? And as you read there in Acts 17 he talks about the god who created all that there is and the god in whom we move and live and have our being and the god who can't be contained by anything, who's infinite and all-knowing and he begins to deal with and give rational answers to the intellectuals of his day.

He even starts to quote some of their own poetry. Some of you have this ability to explain things to people. You like to read people like Francis Schaeffer or J.P. Moreland or Norman Geisler or Ken Boa or you've read Lee Strobel's book The Case for Christ and The Case for Faith and you just find yourself you know looking at scientific journals and the latest thing coming out and archaeology and new discoveries. There's some of you you are made to answer the questions that honest genuine people with questions about could you actually not have to throw your brains in the trash and be a follower of Jesus? And your answer is yes. And the strength of this is you give people hope and you can talk to people in ways that a lot of us never could. The weakness on this one is that some people get so excited about the answers they become a mini lawyer. I've been in places where people say oh man I had this amazing conversation with this you know he was an antagonist and kind of an atheist and man we had this debate and I said this and he said that and I answered with this and he said this and I answered with that it's kind of like wow I really beat him up I showed him how right I was. And I'm thinking I don't think that's the goal.

I think the goal is with love and gentleness to let him know how much you care and in humility to say I think you have some very difficult questions that deserve clear answers shared in humility. That's what you all do. Could that be you? A one?

I can never imagine doing that. A ten. That's me. Which write down a number. Like don't do five at least do four.

Don't do five at least do six. Because what I want to do is I want to give you six snapshots so you can begin to think you know what maybe that's not my love language spiritually but God has this this infinite love and he wants to share it with these people and he's going to use me to build a bridge he's going to I'm going to be a conduit so I want to discover the way that he's made me to do it. The third love language is the blind man's testimonial approach. This is an approach that is natural for people who like to share how God has changed their life. It's just down to earth honestly telling someone this is what God did in me.

This is how my life is currently changing. Here's some of the honest struggles you're willing to be vulnerable that this is what Teresa did last week in her message. She just shared her testimony.

She just shared this is this is where I've been. This is how God gave me strength. This is how God sustained me.

This is how he changed my life. It's just sharing what you've seen what you've heard and what you've experienced. I get this from John 9. The story is about Jesus and the disciples and they're walking along and as they're walking along there's a man who's been blind from birth and the disciples with their presuppositions and faulty theology say Jesus could you tell us is this man blind because of his sin or the sin of his parents? Presuming that anytime something bad happens to someone it must because of their sin and Jesus goes wrong presupposition. Neither. God actually has a plan for this man for his glory and you can read the story it's one I don't hardly want to it's like a great movie I don't want to spoil it for you but he takes mud and puts it on his eyes and tells him to go wash in the pool of Siloam and this man imagine when he was a little boy he's blind and he becomes a beggar he can't get a job and now he's been at the same corner forever and ever and ever and everyone's seen him in the whole town and now he can see and people I mean he can see is could this be the same guy and then the Pharisees the religious leaders learn about it and they go oh wait a second are you the same guy? Yes I am and so they don't believe him so they ask his parents and his parents are so afraid they're gonna get kicked out of the synagogue they say well you know what he's of age ask him and they say well we know this Jesus is a sinner and how can you say this guy this is great non-educated beggar speaking to the intellects of his day all I know sirs is I was blind but now I see whether he's a sinner or not I don't know it just would seem to me that no one could give eyes and seeing to the blind unless God was with him you know what your testimony is irrefutable no one can tell you you have not had the experiences that you've had and just to say to people you know you don't have to have all the apologetics you don't have to be able to articulate everything but in a short conversation in a medium conversation you can just share this is this is my story I got a lady who sent me an email this week it was so encouraging she sent it to Teresa myself she said I have good friendships but I've honestly never really taken the step to communicate Christ's love and so she decided I prayed after last week's message I'm really gonna do this and so one of the people that she knew she decided they were having dinner and so at dinner she just asked a number of very specific questions and heard this lady's story she goes I heard things I just had no idea about her life and guess what the lady did she turned and said well what's your story she said I found myself telling her about my life and what Christ had done and who Jesus is and you know I could read between the lines in the email that maybe maybe this lady kind of had a new age view of Jesus somewhere somehow and as this lady in our church just shared her story the lady said I've never heard anything like this in my life how many people in your relational network that you pass by or you work with or you see as you take a walk with the dog or you know when you're sitting there while the kids are playing baseball or soccer or you know you're on the elliptical or something at the gym and you've kind of built a relationship how many of them have never ever heard of the Jesus who you know who saved you and loved you and forgiven you and maybe the testimonial approach is how you could share it one I could never imagine myself telling anyone my story ten you know there's a lot of things I can't do but I could probably do this one got it write down a number you've been listening to part one of Chip's message discovering your spiritual love language which is from our series share the love Chip will be back with us in studio shortly to share some helpful application for us to think about for one reason or another Christians today are hesitant to share their faith we know we should be doing it more but sometimes just the thought of talking to someone about God can be nerve-racking so why is that and how can we change it in this eight-part series Chip's gonna boost our confidence and teach us to have personal and spontaneous conversations about Jesus learn how to develop the heart skills and perspective to share your faith in a winsome natural way don't miss how you can move from being a secret Christian to an unashamed witness for Christ for more information about share the love or our resources visit Living on the Edge org that's Living on the Edge dot o-r-g well before we go any further in this program our Bible teacher Chip Ingram is with me now to share something really important with all of you thanks so much Dave I want to take a few minutes today to talk directly to you parents and grandparents like me you probably have a mounting concern for your kids and grandkids who are growing up and raising families in our world today they face challenges that we would have never imagined and will face persecutions for being Christians that most of us had not needed to endure in our lifetime what's even more concerning is the dilution of the Bible and the confusion over biblical principles saturating the culture in fact in many churches today the dumbing down of Christianity and the resulting numbness in our children's faith is outright devious this is not a tactic of flesh and blood it's a spiritual war we have to fight these battles in a way that equips the next generation for the war that we're in 25 years ago when God gave me the dream for a discipleship ministry I had no idea how the Lord would grow Living on the Edge to what it is today helping Christians to live like Christians is more important now than when we first began especially for the next generation as they raise our children and our grandchildren let me ask you will you join me and Living on the Edge in this fight for the hearts and the minds of the next generation we need partners who will stand with us financially to help us get the truth in the right places in the right way to cut through the deception that's bombarding our kids each and every day and right now is an especially potent time to give because every dollar that you give from now through July 7th will be doubled dollar for dollar I want to thank you for praying and forgiving whatever God shows you to do together let's stand for our kids and our grandkids we can make a difference well if you're already supporting us we appreciate you your gifts are helping us in profound ways all around the world but if you aren't yet part of the team now is a great time to become a financial partner thanks to a handful of ministry friends every dollar we receive until midnight on July 7th will be matched dollar for dollar to send a gift call us at triple 8 3 3 3 6 0 0 3 that's triple 8 3 3 3 6 0 0 3 or go to Living on the Edge dot org app listeners tap donate well chip in your message today you highlighted different ways people share their faith but regardless of the approach a lot of people are afraid they'll find themselves in an intense debate about the Bible or be asked a question they won't be able to answer so as we wrap up this program what would you say to them well one is when you begin to understand let's call it your evangelistic style or the way God has made you then what you begin to understand is that there's a way that you'll connect with people that is very very natural and very very winsome for you but but I would say the great majority of us as Christians we're kind of like the blind man you know it's like hey all I can tell you is I was blind but now I see man there's joy in my heart God changed my marriage I don't even know how it happened like in my case like it was three weeks later I stopped cussing it was like what I mean I just stopped cussing it was like whoa you know and but I couldn't have explained I mean I couldn't explain anything to anyone and and so what happens is you think I don't know enough and that keeps you trapped and so I'm gonna say two things one is this is what to say and two here's how to be prepared and help them even if you're not ready to say it so number one just use the blind man's approach don't argue you know if they say well what about bop bop bop bop bop and bop and here's what you say well you know what I really don't know much about that but I'm gonna tell you Jesus has changed my life he loves me and this is what's happened and then here's what I would say for a lot of people that's gonna be I'm glad for you but you know can I trust the Bible is it reasonable to believe that Jesus is the only way how in the world can you really believe that those documents have been passed on from here and there there's five or six major questions about the Bible and so I did a series called why I believe and we have it in small group format audio format I would encourage you get that I think it'll give you confidence and be a great help moving forward thanks chip and to learn more about the why I believe small group chip just mentioned go to special offers on the chip and grow map or at Living on the Edge org through this resource chip provides straightforward answers to questions like is the Bible really God's Word what happens after we die and which is true creation or evolution this study will really inform and strengthen your faith again to order the why I believe small group go to special offers on the chip and grow map or at Living on the Edge dot o RG we'll listen to next time as chip continues our series share the love until then I'm Dave Drewey saying thanks for joining us for this Edition of Living on the Edge.