True Spirituality - How to Experience Authentic Community, Part 1

Someone has said the greatest social disease in America today is loneliness. We all long to be deeply connected.

And I want you to know that God has a plan for developing genuine, beautiful, intimate relationships, and He wants you to experience that kind of connection with others. Today we're going to talk about how you can experience authentic community right now, right where you live. Stay with us. Welcome to this Edition of Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. Living on the Edge features the Bible teaching of Chip Ingram on this daily discipleship program.

I'm Dave Druey. And in just a minute, Chip will continue his series, True Spirituality, becoming a Romans 12 Christian. As Chip just said, the focus of this program is on authentic community. The fact is we were all created with a desire to be in relationship with one another. Whether that's a friend, a sibling, a spouse, God has placed that longing in our hearts.

Now this is an important message, especially for those who have been let down or hurt by past experiences. With that, here's Chip with his message, How to Experience Authentic Community, from Romans Chapter 12. Did you ever wonder why so many Christians get spiritually stuck? I mean, the Bible's very, very clear. It says, If any man, if any woman is in Christ, the old things pass away.

Behold, all things become new. And yet, you know, you meet people, and I mean sincere, good, I don't mean slackers, I mean people that really love God. They've seen transformation in some very significant areas, and they're even in the Bible on a regular basis, and they really want to grow.

And yet, they hit a ceiling, or they stall. There's just some area that just seems to, you know, the temper just never seems to get under the Spirit's control, or how they say certain things, or the way they judge people, or there's a little private eating disorder over here, or an addiction maybe even on the internet, and then they feel terrible, and they promise God, and they recommit their life about 25 times, and then they just feel stuck. That's where Andy was when he came and talked to me, except I would have never dreamed Andy was stuck. Andy came when I was pastoring another church many, many years ago, and I met him in the first 10, 20 minutes. I thought, wow, we were really growing at the time, and we're longing for leaders, and he moved in from out of town, and I met him, met his wife, just got to know him, and it was just like, wow, I just so got a heart for God, got up in the mornings, was spending time with God. I saw his family.

He had been a Christian for quite a while, so he'd been in leadership positions in churches. And Andy was a great guy, I mean, warm and caring, and I would never have dreamed that there was a little pocket, sort of a little pocket in Andy's life that he was stuck. And he asked if we could grab a cup of coffee, and he had something he really needed to share with me. I said, sure, Andy, be glad to, and we sat down, and he began to tell me about that compartment that had been sealed off that he tried so hard, and he was stuck. He said, you know, it started when I was about, oh, eight or nine years old, and a Sears catalog came in the mail, and I was flipping through it and found myself in the lingerie session. And then later, I found some magazines underneath my dad's bed. By the time I was a teenager, I was fully addicted to at least soft porn.

When the internet happened, it was just like over overwhelming, the access and the privacy that you could have. And he said, Chip, I have prayed, I've fasted, I've memorized verse, I've begged God, I'll go for a few weeks or a few months, and just my whole life, I mean, my wife, I love her, I'm absolutely committed to her, my kids, I've tried to do all, but this, I'm stuck. And then he shared with me, he said, I heard something on the radio about this group of people, and they are meeting, and he said, for about the last six months, I've been driving 45 minutes on Thursday night, and I'm meeting with this group of people, and I got unstuck. The answer to why he was stuck despite God's word and all the rest came when he met with that group, and I'll tell you a little bit more about it. But as you see on your notes, part of the answer is that the greatest seed in the greatest soil cannot grow in the wrong environment. You might write Luke chapter eight, or Mark chapter four, parallel passages, and Jesus is talking about calling himself, he's the sower, and what he sows is the seed, and the seed is God's word, and the soil is the human hearts, the various reception that the word of God receives. And if you know the story, some is on the path, and some on the rocky soil, and it's just the condition of different people's hearts, and some where it's thorny, and others is good soil.

Good and honest heart, people who are really honest and really want to grow. But here's what I want you to get, the greatest seed, God's word, in the greatest soil, a good and honest heart, cannot grow in the wrong environment. There's certain things in your life and in my life, in every believer's life, transformation won't occur no matter how much you're in the Bible, no matter how honest and desiring your heart is, apart from you being in this environment where it can occur. What I want you to see is there is a specific ecosystem or environment that God has that brings about transformation when the seed of God's word in your heart and mind is there.

And if it's not there, certain things, you just get stuck. Notice in your notes, a little biblical background here, the command of Jesus requires very specific ecosystem or environment. The very last night on the earth, he washed their feet and then he turned to them and he looked them eye to eye and he said, I want you, this is the new commandment, to love each other in the same way I've loved you.

Sacrificially, authentically, lay down your life for one another, but it requires an environment. The second is the example of Jesus requires a very specific environment. When he wanted to change the world, he started by teaching and he went and there was multitudes and thousands and thousands of people and he did miracles. But then when he wanted to get the team together that would change the world, he stayed up all night, he prayed all night and he chose 12 to be, the text says, with him. The multitudes heard the truth, the 12 learned to live the life.

There was an environment that they needed to be in for all that truth to get down on their soul and their life and their relationships. The practice of the early church and its impact argue for the same environment. You know the story, they were committed in Acts 2 to the apostles teaching and to the fellowship of gathering together and to the breaking of bread and to the Lord's supper. It says then they gathered how? In the temple courts and Peter or John or someone would preach and teach all these brand new Christians and then where?

From house to house. Finally, the church history, past and present, confirmed this specific environment for spiritual growth and transformation. And whether I could take you back to the Moravians or the Westleys or the Welsh Revival and they would get these little societies together.

Or I could take you to Korea that was, I mean, completely non-Christian five, six decades ago and the cell movement or the small group movement now spanning the earth. Here's what I want you to get, the specific environment or ecosystem in which the seed of God's word in your heart that's honest and good and wants to grow is authentic community. It's authentic community. Notice the form that it takes is a small group. I mean, the group could be three people, four people, ten people.

But that's just the form, that's the container. Never, ever confuse just being in a small group with authentic community. I've been in small groups that there's no authentic community, haven't you? You ever gone to a small group and someone opens the Bible and reads a little bit and, you know, maybe you watch a little part of the DVD and someone says, well, what did you get for question four? What did you get for question seven? Oh, that's nice, that's nice. And then some deep question is asked and the answer is, oh, maybe I should probably not work so much. Oh, okay, thank you for sharing so deeply.

Are there any prayer requests? Yeah, my hip really hurts. It really hurts, you know. And then you kind of get over with that.

Then you get up and the ladies are over here. Did you hear about that Neustrom cell or Macy's? Do you know what's going on there? And the guys who are over here are going, man, those giants are doing it now, the 49ers. I'll tell you what, that linebacker.

And then you eat a few more little treats and you get in your car and say, wasn't that great? Well, it was, but just don't call it authentic community. It's a good start. It's a connection. You know some people, but authentic community is deeper. Authentic community is this environment where people lay down their lives for one another. Authentic community is where you take a group of people and they say, you know what, we're going to change the world.

And we're around Jesus. Authentic community is living under persecution and hearing God's word and going from house to house to support one another to live it out. In fact, it raises two very important questions. Question number one is what is authentic community?

And then question number two is how do you get it? And the answer to both those questions is in Romans chapter 12 verses 9 to 13. If you just knew with us, we're going through the chapter in Romans 12. And in verse 1 we learned that what God really wants from all of us is what? He wants us surrendered to him, all we are, all that we have. In verse 2 we said there's an enemy of our soul.

There's a world system that's trying to woo and seduce our heart away from our savior. And we're not to be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of our mind to be separate from the world's values. And we looked at verses 3 through 8 and we learned that we're not to think too high or too low, but to have a sober self-assessment.

To know where we fit in the body. And now what he's going to talk about is serving and love. He's going to talk about what kind of relationships are we to have as fellow believers. And if you look at your notes there, in verse 9 you're going to see that authentic community is the real you showing up. Verse 10 is going to say that the real you needs to meet real needs. And then in verse 11 he's going to say the real you needs to meet real needs but for the right reason. And then verses 12 and 13, the real you needs to meet real needs for the right reason and do it in the right way. For some of you, you're where my friend Andy was. You love God, you have a good heart, you're taking in God's word, but you're stuck.

There's a ceiling. You have these outbursts of anger and you feel terrible about it. You have issues in your life that you know you don't want and you've told God I'm sorry and you want to change and you've tried hard to change but you still don't see any radical transformation. I'm telling you, this moment on this day may be God's answer to the environment in which some of those things you've struggled with so long, He can change.

But it doesn't happen alone. So let's look together, what is authentic community and maybe more importantly, how do you get it? First from verse 9, authentic community is the real you, not a projection of yourself. See, you can't have authentic community unless the real you shows up. Authentic community, he says, let love be sincere.

Hate what is evil, cling to what is good. The two characteristics of the real you showing up is one, authenticity and two, it's purity. Where the word says let love be sincere, circle the word sincere and write above it hypocrisy. Paul's borrowing from the Greek of his day and in the Greek theater of that day, they were all male actors. And so if you were a good thespian, you could be able to throw your voice and you could play a male part, a female part, an old person, a young person.

And they dressed up in different costumes and then there would be a mask that you would wear so you would throw your voice. And Paul takes that word for the mask and that's this word. He says let love be without a mask, without hypocrisy. Let the real you show up. Yes, you got to be discerning and you got to be careful of who you share the real you with. But he's saying that authentic community isn't just getting in a small group. It's when the real you showing up and you let people see who you are progressively, wisely, discerningly. In fact, John in your notes, if you were Acts chapter 5, this is important.

I mean this is beyond important. Some people never experience this their entire Christian life and they can never figure out why they don't experience the transformation power that God has promised us in scripture. Now I didn't grow up as a Christian. I never opened the Bible until I was 18. And so my first trip through the New Testament was like oh wow.

I mean really, it was like Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, I mean I didn't know the names of stuff. And then I got to Acts and I figured out okay this is the early church history and you know Jesus ascended, he went to heaven. And in chapter 2 the church is born and chapter 3 you know he and John are you know doing miracles and it's pretty exciting stuff. And then you get to chapter 5 and the church is exploding and so there's all these needs. I mean tens of thousands of people are now in the church in a very short amount of time.

And about 80% of them are slaves and a very small percentage are pretty affluent people. Some inherits household and others and they did this in this time of emergency. They did this sort of unusual thing where they all came together and they said we need to help each other. We need to be devoted to one another and so in chapter 4 it gives an example of this very wealthy man who had a piece of property in Cyprus on this island.

Which is the equivalent of like downtown San Francisco or Manhattan in that day. And so he sells it and he takes the money and he says look, I mean I don't know this for sure but you know I got a second home. You know this is a piece of property you take this to meet the needs of the people in the church they're really hurting. And I think a buzz happened in the church where wow. I mean it was so sacrificial it was so generous and people were like boy I guess this is what it means to love one another. And his name was Barnabas and I think Barnabas got this reputation because they started calling him the son of encouragement. And the story goes on in Acts chapter 5 and jot that down because before your head hits the pillow you ought to read it.

It's not very long it's very interesting. But I'm a brand new Christian and I'm reading this and so there's this young couple I'm guessing they're young maybe they're not young but Ananias and Sapphira. And so they kind of look around and they think wow everyone's talking about Barnabas we wish people would talk about us like that. We sure wish people would think we're that generous and loving and kind and so they hatched this plan. And the plan is here's what we're going to do we're going to sell this piece of property and we'll get the money and we'll tell people that we sold it for this much money and like we gave it all away. But we'll really keep back the money for us so we'll kind of have our cake and eat it too. We'll appear generous and loving and sacrificial but we'll still have the major part of the money. And so you know he comes and talks to Peter and God reveals to Peter what's going on and Peter says Ananias why have you lied to the Holy Spirit? Before it was sold it was yours.

After it was sold it was yours. You aren't compelled to give a little or a lot. The issue is integrity. And then right there bam he dies. I mean literally drops dead and the young men come and pick him up for what? His hypocrisy.

The very first sin in the church is hypocrisy and the judgment is death. His wife comes a few hours later and I'm thinking Peter's going I sure hope she's not in on this. And so he says Sephira it's good to see you. How's things going? Oh pretty good. How's the kids?

I'm adding just a little. And he says to her so did you sell this piece of land for such and such a price? Oh yes. You know Ananias when you're married to such a generous loving kind amazing husband like I have and we sacrificially have given it all away. I'm again reading between the lines. And Peter looks at her and I think just with sadness in his heart he said the young men's feet who took away your husband shall take you away as well. Bam she dies on the spot. And it says a great fear came among the church.

Yeah are you kidding? Now you got to understand can you imagine if you've never read the Bible before and this is your first time through the New Testament and you're a brand new Christian. You're thinking so this is what happens to hypocrites I'm in trouble. I mean literally it was like whoa. In fact if God was acting in this way I think he was going to make a point.

See if hypocrisy gets in the mix it's like leaven and bread and spreads. And when people aren't authentic the message of Jesus would have been wiped out within a few years. And so God wanted to demonstrate how important this was. And I often thought later when I was a pastor if God did that for like 24 hours in the church all across America. All of us would have to turn in our pastors badges and become morticians. Probably a lot of us pastors would need other pastors who are doing better than us to bury us. But do you get it? Do you really get that church quote was never ever intended to be a group of people that come to an event.

And feel like in some way they're doing something morally positive because they come to an event and listen to someone talk about God and even sing a few worship songs to him and then file out and live life their own way. And not be absolutely connected to one another and have a safe environment where the real you shows up. And you know why the real you doesn't show up?

The same reason the real you doesn't show up in me. He says let love be without hypocrisy and then it says cling to what is good hate what is evil. Literally the word is abhor what is evil. It's that picture I remember doing a word study on this and it's a picture of being on vacation for like three or four weeks.

Whoever gets that much time but that's really hypothetical. But you've been out of town for a while and there's a carton of milk or some fruit and you open the carton of milk to smell at the sea and it's oh have you ever done that? And the smell is so bad you want to throw up that's this word. It says abhor evil. Most of us are spending this I wonder if this is wrong how close can I get to sin without falling in.

So people in counseling will ask me questions like well is this rating this rating this rating in this movie. Do you think it's okay if I can do this or you know we're dating right now and we're doing this this this and this. Is that really sexual sin or can we or you know we have so much money and I want to know is it the gross or is it the net or can I take a percentage. You know it's kind of like how instead of what to say cling to what is good.

That's completely the wrong question. The issue isn't how close can I get to sin quote without sinning. It's how close can I get to God. How pure can I live.

Because when you're pure not perfect pure. The real you can show up. Because you can be honest. And you know one of the most powerful and significant experiences you will ever have in your life.

Is being in a small group of people that's really safe that really love you and you really love them. And the real you shows up. The real you that's making great progress. The real you with the frustrations and hurts and struggles. The real you with the real problems. And as you bring your struggles you're not judged.

You're loved. And the real you that needs help gets support. And the real you that needs accountability and as we all do an occasional kind of rebuke. And you know what were you thinking.

You kind of violated our trust by that. See that's a fundamental part of authentic community and a lot of people never have that. And so enormous amounts of energy. What we end up doing instead of allowing God to transform us. The energy is we have to do sin management. And so we're spending all this energy trying to either hide or deal with our guilt or deal with our shape.

Or drown it out with food or work or money or shopping or speed. Chip will join us here in studio with his application in just a minute. You've been listening to the first part of his message. How to experience authentic community from his series true spirituality becoming a Romans 12 Christian. The word Christian means little Christ. So when we put our faith in Jesus we are to look and act like little copies of Jesus. Unfortunately that is not the reputation Christians have in this day and age.

So how can we change that. Well through the series Chip teaches us what it means to be a genuine follower of Christ by studying Romans chapter 12. You'll discover God's plan for you and me.

Why we matter, the need for genuine community and how we should respond to evil and injustice. So if you're wanting a clear blueprint to becoming a true little Christ these messages are for you. Listen anytime on the Chip Ingram app or at livingontheedge.org.

Our website is also where you can learn more about the resources for this series which are discounted for a limited time. And while you're on our site let me encourage you to sign up for the brand new daily discipleship with Chip based on true spirituality. For 17 days Chip will walk with you through Romans 12 and reveal what it means to really follow after Jesus and the ups and downs of everyday life. You can sign up for this study right now and when you do we'll send you our friend Lance Witt's devotional based on Romans 12 called leave ordinary behind at no cost.

Sign up now while this offer lasts by going to livingontheedge.org or calling 888-333-6003. App listeners just tap discipleship. I'm going to be right back and I'm going to talk about today's message but I want to talk directly and personally to you first. We've got millions of people going to church going through the motions many of them sincere but ignorant about the gospel about truth their lives don't change. We have a whole generation of young people saying you can have your Jesus and your churchianity and I'm out of here because they don't see reality. And Living on the Edge has been called to declare war on religious activity that doesn't align with the Jesus of the New Testament.

But we can't do it without you. I grew up in that environment and I turned away from God and I just praise God that he brought people into my life that clearly explained the gospel but as importantly they lived it out. And they lived it out in real life and loved me and cared for me and they were holy and they weren't weird. God longs to do that in our day and the message of Living on the Edge is helping Christians live like Christians. We do it through teaching we create resources but it requires a team and for us to do it moving toward the future as God has opened more and more doors. I simply tell you I need your help. Would you prayerfully consider partnering with us today and kind of move that good intention you thought about it I ought to help them out. Yeah I already decided in my head I would but the fact is you haven't acted on it yet. Act on it today let's make a difference. Thanks Chip. If that mission resonates with you we'd love to have you join us.

Helping Christians get a high accurate biblical view of God will change the world we live in. To give a gift today just give us a call at 888-333-6003. Or if you prefer to give online you can donate securely by going to livingontheedge.org. That's livingontheedge.org.

Your generosity is greatly appreciated. You know as we wrap up today's program I guess the question I have for you is that if a non-Christian overheard you talking or was sort of at the next table at a coffee shop and heard you kind of talking with a friend. Would they hear you talking about other people or would they hear you talking about information would it be just sports or what's on sale or would they kind of eavesdrop and think wow I wish I had a relationship with someone that was that deep that real that vulnerable and that authentic. And I don't know where you're at on this but you don't you don't slide into it.

If you don't have close friends then you need to launch a small group or if your family doesn't have these kind of relationships and don't get me wrong I know it's hard. You got to go there because at the end of the day relationships are what matter and deep relationships that matter can't happen without authenticity. And that means I got to get real you got to get real and what I'll tell you this personally is it's a little scary and you need to be wise about who you do it with. But it'll be the greatest thing that ever happens because when the real you shows up and the real you gets loved it's awesome and that's God's plan. Hey before we go let me remind you of an easy way to listen to our extended teaching podcast here chip anytime on Amazon's Alexa Echo and Echo Dot just say Alexa open Living on the Edge and you'll hear that day's extended teaching anytime you want. Well for Chip and everyone here this is Dave Druey saying thanks for joining us for this Edition of Living on the Edge.