This is the Truth Network. Well, good morning and welcome to Kingdom Pursuits. Robbie is not with us this morning.
He is on vacation enjoying the beach and I hope it's not quite as wet as it is looking out the studio window here with the rain coming down. This morning on Kingdom Pursuits, I'm Jerry Mathis Raised Body Shop and Record Service. I've got three guys sitting in front of me and we're going to spend a little bit of time just talking a little bit about men's ministry and stuff and when I kind of put today together, I thought it'd just be a good opportunity to just talk about the men's ministry because it's something that I really feel sometimes is hard to get traction and part of the reason for that I think is just the fact that men are men. I mean, we our makeup is we think we can do it on our own and don't like those warm, fuzzy kind of relationships sometimes with other men and it's just kind of one of those things where we just don't really think that we have that in us and we just think, you know what, I can have a relationship with Christ but I need to kind of keep it all in these boundaries and perimeters and not really invite people in my world. I mean, we most of the time we'll let our family in somewhat, I mean, because I mean probably the one I'd share more stuff with would be my wife Myra and daughter Taylor and over the years men's ministry has really meant a lot to me and that's why I just wanted to make sure I spent time this morning and there's so much scripture, we go through the Bible and stuff, you know what God created mankind for was relationship. I mean, He wanted to have relationship with mankind, that's why He created Adam, that's what creation of the world was all about and then, you know, unfortunately mankind is flawed and we have free will on which gets us in a lot of trouble sometimes and that's sort of what we're still paying the price for, the sin nature is the creation of the world with Adam.
I mean, we think about it you know, you have conversations with people who aren't Christians and they're saying you know what, if God really was creator of everything, why didn't He create that perfect world, why didn't He create a world with no problems, no sickness, no hate, no anger no cancer, no Alzheimer's, no relationship problems and you know what, got news for you, He did. Mankind messed it up, here we are, we did mankind messed it up by our sin nature and stuff and our free will and then we sit there and we look at the New Testament and you know, what the church was built on was relationships. I mean, you go back and you look at the New Testament church in Acts, they got together they studied the scripture and the apostles teachings, but one of the main things and what drew other people to the church at that time was the fellowship they saw it was the community that they saw in that body. So I think as men, we kind of want to push that back a little bit and this morning as I said, I got three guys that we're going to kind of dive into a little bit of what we're here to talk about. One thing, we as a group have breakfast on Wednesday mornings at Omega House on Peters Creek Parkway on Winston-Salem at seven in the morning and really just have, last hour I read from Sarah Young Devotions, that's one of the things we kind of springboard for our conversation, but it's a group of guys that get together and just share and are open with each other and we're going to talk about that and maybe some of the difficulties in that. But before we do, I'm going to go ahead and let these three guys introduce themselves and I'm going to ask the question for you during your introduction share a little bit about your walk with Christ and what got you to this place today, not the studio, but your walk with Christ today okay.
Start out with, I don't know if I'm going to call if it's Tim Bowman or Rick O'Neill, I've got one of the two guys here Well, since we're on the Truth Network, you know, again, I have to give my real name because that's the way it is My name is Tim Bowman and I love Jesus Christ, I am a follower of Jesus Christ and I have a shirt on today that says God is Awesome and He is and that's one thing you have to do. These guys that I deal with, if we have twelve guys that show up on Wednesday morning at seven o'clock and I know it's real early, but seven o'clock for men is a good time, but if we have twelve guys, I always call them the twelve disciples because again, that's what God, that's what Jesus had, twelve disciples that actually followed Him and that's how things work out but again, it does take men to do something and that is true, there's a lot of things that are out there, but again, if you want to start a business or something like that, you've got to have some manpower behind you and you do. I mean, there's more men that actually do things in the morning than women I think it is, and I hate to sound like that, but I'm not being sexist about this, but again, it takes men to do things, and I've been with this men's group now for probably about twenty-five, thirty years, something like that I've spent a long time, and I love being with guys that love the Lord, and these other two guys they, I've seen them and I love to make sure that they're there, I miss them when they're not there on Wednesday morning, even you, when you're not there on Wednesday morning we're kind of lost because you're our leader, you have been That may be one of the flaws of the group now That's all I have to say right now. And before I go to Jerry, I just want to again remind you this is the calling show 866-348-7884 If you have a question about a men's group, or you're in a men's group that meets at your local church or a group, give us a call and let us know a little bit about it and stuff.
Alright Jerry, you got the floor I'm Jerry Dorset, I've been at Pinedale about three decades grew up in Randolph County down in Petty Country and my parents came out of homes, I was thinking about this as we were getting ready to kind of pull our notes together, both my parents came out of single parent homes, and my mom was, she was still raised in church, but my dad was not, and we never really got to be around that family, and he had said that when he was growing up he had decided that it was going to be different, he was going to break that chain of just not doing a lot of things that they should be and when he moved down to North Carolina, he and my mom got together and so as you like to say Jerry, I was drugged to church all those years, had a real drug problem and if I didn't want to go, I had a real problem and as I moved along, I was a Methodist and then I became a Baptist when I got married married to a good Baptist and then over time things changed and we found Pinedale and the way we got plugged in with men's opportunities, there were a lot, there was lots going on at Pinedale, but one thing I recall is we all rode in a van together to some of the promise keeper events, we did several in Washington D.C. and on one of those trips we were talking about wouldn't it be neat if we could get together and carry some of this magic back and that's what we did and it's interesting as we look back, we talk about that, but at least three decades we've been getting together as Tim mentioned and it really is, there's a lot of we see a lot of loneliness and we hear about a lot of loneliness and that's something that having a men's group, it plugs you in and you've got people that you can count on, you can call them anytime, I know this past week I was a little careless and got hurt and then a couple of the guys in the group called to check on me after that and then after that they made fun of me of course for doing something not very smart, but it's just a real blessing it really adds a piece and especially for so many men who are lonely a church like that just going sometimes is not enough, but there are lots of groups, we have lots of other breakfast groups and groups that meet on Monday afternoons there and do that kind of thing When we come back we'll go over to Ed and get him to introduce himself, but as I said it's a calling show 866-348-7884 Kingdom Pursuits, I'm Jerry Mathis and again God has got something in store for the men of this country and his followers of Jesus Christ You're listening to the Truth Network and TruthNetwork.com Welcome back to Kingdom Pursuits and as we left you we were about ready to roll right in with Ed over here, and Ed go ahead and introduce yourself Well good morning everyone, my name is Ed Williams and I have been in North Carolina up in the Winston-Salem area for a little over 30 years, come up here in 92 I'm originally a person from Northeast Georgia and then work had me move up in this area, I have enjoyed it I've been a Christian probably the majority of my life got baptized when I was a young teenager and then I was Baptist at the time and then when I moved up here I went to several of the Baptist churches, but I actually moved down into Davison County and every day I would be going by this church and it was called Pinedale Christian and I noticed that there was cars out there almost every day of the week and it got me curious and at the time I was single and so I found out that they had a singles program and I started going there on Wednesday nights, the singles program and from that I met Danny and some of the other people at the church and I was going both there some on Sundays and to another Baptist church and it got to the point that I said I really can't get involved with one or the other or both at the same time so I decided to switch and that's when I started going to the Pinedale church full time and also through the singles program I met my wife of 13 years now and then also a few years ago, I guess I'm the young one of the bunch in the sense that I only got involved with this men's group the last three or four years and actually my wife said you need to go out and meet other men and get involved with some of the other men and I felt that hey, this church group, these church men I really like enjoying being with them and that's sort of how I got involved with the Wednesday morning group is, you know, a lot of them were from our church not all of them but a lot of them were and started going and as I said it's been two or three years now and I really, really enjoy it Yeah, and when Jerry mentioned started with Promise Keepers and stuff and I'm thinking that's probably like 35, 36 years ago anybody who grew up in that era, I mean that was just a novel idea to get men together in coliseums and just seeing them worshipping our Lord and Savior and stuff and it made a huge impact on me and I know Jerry and I'm saying that with Jerry was with me through this whole journey I mean from the first day we met and the first breakfast that we ended up having had been part of it and stuff and we've seen it grow and have ebb and flow about it and back and forth but you know there's, when I say that men just don't naturally want to gravitate towards that and the thing is there's groups out there, I know like at Pinedale Christian Church there's a men's alliance and there's a couple men's groups that meet and stuff and I encourage people to always, you know, find something that fits well for you, something that you feel comfortable in some people don't like it where it's a lot of conversation, we'd have a lot of conversation in our group but there's some that just rather not have the conversation we just rather have a get together but they really don't know the guy sitting beside them and stuff and that's not what I longing in my heart and stuff for our group to have and stuff but if you're a man and you're listening to this I encourage you to find that group in your church or in your community and if you can't find that group maybe God's telling you you need to start that group and as we get together on Wednesday mornings and I'm going to throw this question out to the three guys I mean what's your take as far as take away from it what does that Saturday morning mean, I mean that Wednesday morning mean to you? Well one thing that I like Wednesday morning is like the middle of the week and again it's like a refresher devotions after Sunday you kind of go down and it picks you back up, it's like a pick me up and I like being with the guys and we talk we'll ask every guy what's up, what's going on and they tell a little bit about their self and prayer requests and things like that they speak their mind in other words and again I like that and that's what I do, I speak my mind, I speak too much, that's what I do When I think about breakfast I think about a lot of Wednesdays we laugh, I mean we've gotten comfortable enough we pick on one another and then there's some accountability there because you think about you come in and you want to be able to walk in and have integrity with the group and not have messed up too bad in the last week because they're going to give you a hard time anyway but it's a respectability and there's actually been weeks I wouldn't tell our Matthew Sink our lead pastor about this but sometimes that Wednesday morning has been better than what I heard in a pulpit Sunday morning not often, sometimes, so it just really ministers and being able to check in and there's some guys that can't come all the time so you're able to keep up with them and whereas church sometimes you're crushed, we take times, you know we usually get there 7 a little early and it'll be 8.30 sometimes 9 o'clock and I know sometimes conversations go on out in the parking lot and Tim had something come up with some surgery a while back and I had this boo boo I had different things and there again the guys are checking in with you and it's nice to know that someone cares and then we have some in the group that have lost their spouses in the last year and that's ministered not only to them and to us and then we've got you know some that have had issues with children from time to time and then our spouses but it's just a place you can go in and you can be honest and frank no one's going to make fun of you and they care about you and with all the personalities we have in the room it's interesting we have that commonality and for hours it's kind of really kind of turned into an old guys group which works good for us I don't know about that but anyway yes the one thing I enjoy about it is that we can get together as just a group of guys and we can talk about things that are on our minds or have concerns or whatever and you don't feel the burden of not being able to talk about them the fellowship the relationships that have developed and again you know I've been there a couple three years now it's amazing you are able to talk to that person maybe even better than your wife sometimes but at that level too that you can talk to these guys and they hold you responsible but also like Jerry and Tim said they are willing to help you they'll go out there they'll do things to help you and that's meant the world to me. You know something else look around and it's not everyone every week but I guarantee you if something comes up and you were in a bind start calling and there be men that they would come help you and I would be the same way with them and as you look around that group there's a lot of talents in our group we have a money guy and we have someone that's dealt in land we have Jerry with a body shop we have electrician expertise we have radio expertise just a lot of things and it's interesting just when you have a need you go in there and how much they can help you it's just the benefits it's just like they talk about that overflowing cup and it really is there's so many good things that come out of being there and I never leave that group and I'm sorry I am always I feel better when I leave I feel encouraged and if I'm having a bad day you know we've had weeks that one guy would come in there and spend the whole time because someone in their family is driving them crazy and it gives a sounding board and there's good wisdom in a group like that because there's all these talents and gifts that people have been given by God it's just a blessing. Yeah and I think as I said early on is for some reason men just are afraid of that I think once we ever once you drop the guard down a little bit and realize you know what this is a group of guys I can I can trust with what's going on in my life that I can trust that they're going to pray for me and I can trust that they're going to they're also going to tell me when I'm wrong and that's that may be one of the biggest obstacles for men's group is they don't know men don't want somebody to tell them they're wrong and the really true love for somebody and true wanting to help somebody is sometimes you need to tell we need to be told when I'm I need to be told when I'm wrong and it's I could probably keep somebody busy telling me when I'm wrong but we all we all need that and I've always been surprised as some of the people came into the group over the over the years where people came in that that I have somewhat known from a distance for years and never had any conversation with them and never really and when they show up on a Wednesday and start coming I'm like wow I mean I never knew that about them I never knew their heart and their desire and stuff and that speaks for the group that speaks for the whole group that people can feel that feel that comfort level I mean am I right? I mean we kind of and you know I think that's what's so important I think why men struggle so much and why I think it's so important that y'all jump in here if I'm if I'm off base on this but I think too many times men hit the wall because they don't have that support system and we know that we have it with our family we think we have it with our church but it's not deep enough and I think these groups get it where it's a lot deeper we're back in just a moment fix to go another break again it's a call and love to hear your story 866-348-7884 You're listening to the Truth Network and truthnetwork.com Welcome back to Kingdom Pursuits and again I tell you what we haven't had any calls but I'd love to hear somebody give me a call about your group and what goes on with your men's group and well maybe even well you may have a question why does anybody want a men's group nobody wants to sit around with a bunch of men and talk and share what's that all about we don't need to do that we're men we don't need that well Jesus did that all the time okay I mean serious this is something serious about this because I make fun because we normally have 12 guys that come in but again Jesus had 12 disciples and then 12 disciples went out and they listened to him they listened to Jesus and we do the same thing at our group because we're all talking but we do listen absolutely and as a maybe Jerry or Ed may have mentioned it but we you know the diversity of the group is probably what is probably what makes it even stronger and the fact of you know in James one of the things about you know the book of James it talks about how when we experience things hardships in our life trials in our life what are we to do we're to go and show the grace that Jesus Christ showed us to get us through those times we as Christians are supposed to paint that forward we're supposed to do that for other people and you know what whenever any of us have gone through a trial we have a unique perspective as far as to help somebody else when they're going through that because this we've had as I'm sitting here I made three people have lost their spouses in our in our group I haven't so I can't really completely understand it so when I say you know I understand how you feel I really don't understand how you feel but with with groups like this there's somebody in there who does know how they feel and I've seen how different members of this of our breakfast group have ministered to other members because they've gone through that and they understand that and it's just you know it didn't they don't sit there and tell you this is a step-by-step plan that you have to do but it's let them know that you know what it's just important to know that somebody else has traveled that journey and came out on the other end and Jerry's nodding his head I think we all have seen that in different aspects You know when you're dealing with something like that I've watched those same men as well what I heard all three of them say is they hit some real lonely spots in their life and that's not the only they're not the only people doing that I mean I have those but I saw the first one who lost his wife and then the second one come in and he was really hurting and he pulled him over to the corner after breakfast and they talked when we were leaving they were still talking and I know he was going over some of the steps he went over how he dealt with things how you'll make it this is not fun and I think he actually even took one of the guys to lunch time or two because he's always just really needed to sit down and just have someone to bounce things off like you said that they had something in common Yeah that's one of the things I really enjoy about the men's group is that you get to feed off of the others experiences and that you know it's almost a training session of okay here's how they handled it or here's what their thoughts about it and it really makes a difference when you run across those experiences. Yeah and I think in our group I mean so many of us have dealt with aging parents and losing parents and stuff I know that over the last few years that's been a struggle and I've got you know nobody's just sat down and said it but just the conversation we've had you know I mean got a mom that has Alzheimer's and struggling through that and stuff but and making decisions when you have to make it's just good to hear other people who have gone that journey and stuff I think we you know as men we need that and as I said as I was before we went into the break I think too many times men don't have that foundation and that support system I mean you know it's my wife doesn't really understand some of the how a man thinks sometimes and stuff and it's just good to have that group I mean Tim I think you'll agree I mean it's different with men and the way we process things and I think there's strength in getting having that group that you can bounce things off of and you know what even more importantly than just bouncing it off of and I think Jerry mentioned this earlier is when we walk out of there if there's a concern any of us have the guys don't just say we'll be praying for you I mean we don't leave it we don't don't leave it there at the table on the napkin and walk out and forget about it until next week if somebody brings it back up I mean we know that that group of guys seriously care about you. Yeah I agree That's true I think if we all have our telephone number and again I'll see a whole list of telephone numbers and I'm like I'm glad somebody's thinking about me or praying about me too because again like I said two or more are gathered in his name anything can be done and I think these guys we don't we have a bond I think we all have a bond with other men and it's what it takes and if you don't have a bond with a group you need to get one get into it try to find somebody come to ours I'd love to have more guys that are there we've got plenty of room like it says in the bible there's always room more at the cross so again you come at seven o'clock if you're in Winston-Salem or near Winston-Salem and you're listening to the sound of my voice or any of these guys voice come on out to the mega house they would love to have you there's good food good prices and again find fellowship with these guys here even me there's something funny over the years you remind me of Tim we came back and after our trip to DC we had stopped at something like three or five or seven international house pancakes we couldn't get away from them it was like God was telling us something so we came back and I believe that's what we actually started at was IHOP and they ran into some changes and our group changed and we had different people showing up and so we went to the church for a while and we went to another restaurant I think the mega house for a while and we went somewhere else and came back COVID had an impact on us and I remember it was kind of interesting how you go to these different places and they have a personality of their own and sometimes it got to where it didn't work so we just kind of changed I remember we had a guy one time that was going to have us sing that didn't go well and you could look around the room and say that's just not our group it's not our group but the study we have right now that we're doing mornings it doesn't take long but everyone's looking at that ahead of time it really has a nice plug in with us but it's just you get into this you've got to be flexible and you know we're all kind of at least I am I'm quirky at times and I'm glad I can walk in there and men don't really care they're just glad you're here and I know with our group sometimes if you miss three, four, five times you start getting emails and calls saying are you okay, where are you, when are you coming back and so it's just a lot of neat opportunities and benefits that come out of this. Yeah absolutely and my question I might throw out a question to you what is probably the biggest surprise because we all kind of did it and I'll start biggest surprise with our men's group and I think would probably be the surprise with all men's group is that the ability to stay together I mean I think the faces have changed with our group but basically the group that got started many many years ago is still still meeting and we've had a lot of people that was in the original group that started it have moved away and lived out live outside of the state now and stuff but probably one of the biggest surprises to me has been the longevity and also the momentum of how it's built and how God as you mentioned, Jerry mentioned God will also take it different paths I think there's been different seasons in all of our lives where the group has kind of shifted a little bit to meet those needs and stuff and that's really what surprises me and how we can all come together from different backgrounds and focus on the common love of Jesus Christ. Well I think you said it there, the common of Jesus Christ makes a big difference so I guess we're fixing to go on breaks.
Yep we're fixing to go on a break, we'll be back in just a minute. We're going to hear Ed's words of wisdom when we come back. Welcome back to Kingdom Pursuits and as we left our hero Ed Williams, he's fixing to say some profound wisdom on us.
Go ahead Ed. Oh yeah, hello. Now what I was going to say is that one of the things, I think guys in general are brought up as okay, you're the one that has to fix the situation. No matter what it is, you're the one that's going to be responsible for trying to get it fixed, to make it right, whatever the case may be and that's one of the things I don't see in this group is that hey, we can discuss our problems and there are suggestions and different things like that but we're not expected to fix some situations and again it's like the experience. You hear other people's thoughts. Jerry talked about the loss of a spouse and stuff like that. It's amazing because to me, you I have a wonderful spouse April and I hope we live a very long time but you hear how people handle those situations and I think that's so important because I think it actually helps our relationship.
So that's my words of wisdom. When I think back, you ask about things that are kind of amazing or surprising. I think back to the different people that had been in our group and what they brought in, it was almost, we had a Bob Pluck, someone who passed away that was in our group for a long time and he did the devotions every week and Bob was a man who never let anything worry him and I know we would listen to him and think, how do you do that?
And he got to a point, I remember the day he came in and I bet you do too, that he said, I can't do this anymore. My health and all and everybody's like, oh what are we going to do? Two weeks Bob was back and I think for about another year he led our group but then others stepped up. I mean you've really stepped up in this leadership role but God's always provided for us and the group kind of molded and melded and changed but was loving and adaptable. I also think back over times at Pinedale and other places I've been where groups almost were forced you get assigned to a group and some of those didn't fit very well and I was very uncomfortable and didn't feel like I could really share and so you really, you do have to go back to that point we talked about moments ago that you need to find a group that works for you.
As Jerry said, start a group and if it isn't quite working, try something else but just don't give up on it. Yeah, I was in the group when I started it, I was in the singles group and singles group is good at Pinedale and I don't know just I was talking to Jerry, Jerry invited me to come to the group and he said, hey we're meeting over there and again I felt like I was mature enough to hang out with these guys you know because again I didn't know I was single and the rest of them were probably married or whatever, I didn't know but again I plugged in to a group and I said hey I like this, I mean you just meet for an hour or two on Wednesday but I mean it was different. It started my week better that I could listen more and it was a blessing, it really was and that's one thing about it, you need to plug in. Plug in and commit to it, I mean that's it just because it's a blessing believe me and as we get ready to wrap up I want to make sure I give everybody an opportunity anything that you'd like to add or that I didn't get a chance to say? The biggest thing I can say is I've really enjoyed this group and to me it's been very beneficial and again like Jerry's saying, find a group, find a group of men that you're comfortable with and that you can get involved with because it's just a great experience. Tim and Jerry and Ed all turned out to be better than I thought so that would be my five words of wisdom of it, good guys. Well I enjoyed the group and again like I say if you don't have one, try to find one, find one, I mean if your church doesn't have one start one, it's real easy. Yeah but that's what I want to close with is the fact of if you're hearing this broadcast and I don't care where you're going, what churches, like I say, Pinedale has opportunities for me to get plugged into that group. I know Dario does a group at all the Dario restaurants, it's a larger group and Stu leads the one on Clemenceau Road but look and find somewhere to get plugged in because I think that men, I think you'll find out there's a lot of strength in humbling yourself sometimes and if you don't see that group in your church or your that you're with or your Sunday school class maybe God's telling you to go ahead and start that group.
You be the one. Start it and it's a lot of trial and error. Just commit to it and I think too many times we live in a society that's microwave society. If it doesn't work right off the bat we want to fold up our tent and go home. You know what, sometimes it just takes a little bit of work and I encourage you to do that.
If you're not with a group and you're a man and there's also women's groups, women more, I think they gravitate to that a lot easier than men. So I just think it's important that you get around and build a community of believers to support each other. Tomorrow morning if you don't have plans to be in church I encourage you to get up, go to church, worship our Lord and Savior. This morning on Kingdom Pursuits, it's been a great morning. I can't tell you how much I appreciate having Ed and Jerry and Tim in the studio with me. Nick on the other side of the glass, appreciate you and make it happen. Robbie, hope he's having a great vacation and enjoying it himself and I hope the sun is shining. And again hope to see you at Pine Dale or at a church, your local church.
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