Jokes From Last Saturday's Show - Hope Humor

Speaking of hope... I don't know if you knew this, but I hope to be a millionaire just like my dad. You know, he hoped to be one too.

You liked that, didn't you? So, I don't know if you knew this, Jamie, but 20 years ago, we had Bob Hope, Steve Jobs, and Johnny Cash. Now, we have no hope, no jobs, and no cash.

It's all gone, you know, it's just, you know, there you go. And so, you know, Sam told me, he's in the studio too, Sam told me he never wanted to get addicted to skiing. You know why, Carmen? No, why?

Because it's a slippery slope, all skiing. That was good, Robbie. You weren't worried about that, weren't you, John?

See, I called you John, even though I want to call you Jonathan. Out of my heart. This one's a little risky. It might have to go on after hours if we were doing Master than Journey, but I'll say it anyway. I hope the guy who invented autocorrect, I hope he burns in hello. There you go. So, with all that, you know I actually would have a riddle, and I'm very excited about my riddle.

Actually, it makes me laugh. So, who was, and I think his nationality was, he was Finnish. But anyway, he was an axe borrower, he borrowed an axe in the Bible. Who did he use to get that axe to float that axe head? Which person in the Bible, he used this guy to get his axe head to float, I think he was Finnish. You know why I think he was Finnish? He was from Helsinki. He'll sink you. Maybe it was Axe Sinky.