Work The Problem And Fly The Plane

What do you say to a caregiver?

How do you help a caregiver? I was talking to this billing agent at the doctor's office and said, how are you feeling? And she said, oh great It's Friday. And before I could catch myself, I said Friday means nothing to me. Every day is Monday. And I felt kind of ashamed of that and I'm sorry for that, but I realized that whole principle of every day is Monday. What that means for us as caregivers, we know that this is going to be a challenging day. And I wrote these one-minute chapters.

You literally could read them in one minute. And I'm really proud of this book. It's called A Minute for Caregivers, when every day feels like Monday. It's filled with bedrock principles that we as caregivers can lean on, that we can depend upon to get us to safety, where we can catch our breath, take a knee if we have to, and reorient our thinking and the weight that we carry on our shoulders. If you don't know what to say to a caregiver, don't worry about it.

I do. Give them this book. This is Peter Rosenberger and this is A Minute for Caregivers. Several pilots I know express a standard command often given to less experienced pilots. Work the problem and fly the plane. The context involves pilots who fixate on a problem like a storm, console light, or other issues. Riveting one's eyes on a single point to the exclusion of the bigger picture can quickly result in disastrous outcomes, particularly with piloting an aircraft.

I mean, think about it. If you're staring at a console light, the plane is still moving at several hundred knots per hour. Locking in on one issue while dangerously losing perspective is not exclusive to pilots. Caregivers frequently spiral out of control while arguing with an impairment like Alzheimer's disease, alcoholism, or addiction, all of which can easily overpower a caregiver and divert eyes from flying the plane. Our responsibility as caregivers is to see the bigger picture when our loved ones can't. Just like every passenger in the plane depends on the pilot not losing focus, so do all who rely upon us as caregivers. While no one would think of handing over a plane to an untrained individual, caregiving sadly serves as the ultimate on-the-job training environment. Even the best of caregivers discover they are outmatched and ill-prepared. That's why each of us requires regular reminders to keep calm and work the problem and fly the plane.

Let your eyes look directly forward and your gaze be straight before you. Proverbs chapter 4 verse 25. This has been an excerpt from my book, A Minute for Caregivers When Every Day Feels Like Monday. You can see more at HopeForTheCaregiver.com.