When Expectations in Marriage Fall Flat

Let's talk about our wedding day. Do we even have pictures? I don't think we have pictures.

Of course we do. Here's what I remember about our wedding day, besides your dad hiring a guy at work to take the pictures. That's what I remember. And the paper cups for the reception. Wait, that's what you remember about our wedding? It was the cheapest wedding man could have because your dad was cheap.

And I love the guy. I would have done it exactly the same way if I had daughters. Wait, wait, wait. Let's go back. What do you remember about our wedding day? What do I remember?

I had hair. Welcome to Family Life Today where we want to help you pursue the relationships that matter most. I'm Ann Wilson and I'm Dave Wilson and you can find us at familylifetoday.com or on our Family Life app.

This is Family Life. Today. What do you remember about our wedding day? Actually, the first thing I remember is forgetting the lyrics of the song I wrote you. Do you remember? Yes.

I laugh so hard. But you don't remember the vows? Oh, yeah, the vows. They were traditional vows. They were. Yeah, and I've done them a thousand times as a pastor.

That was my point. That day was so special, but we were nervous. You were singing me a song that you made up, which was amazing.

That was a big surprise. I thought it would be the coolest thing ever and I forgot the lyrics. And I just stood there and the pastor, remember, he covered up really good.

He goes, look what happens to a man in the midst of beauty or something like that. And then I remembered the lyrics and you married me. I did. But what I remember about that day wasn't the actual ceremony. When we started our honeymoon, we got on our knees before we got into our bed and we prayed. Yep. Do you remember that? I remember exactly word for word.

God, we're not asking you for a good marriage, but a great marriage that will one day impact the world for your kingdom. That's what I remember. And I remember surrendering our lives to Jesus and that, to me, was a holy moment. It was a holy moment. And it reminded me of Dr. Bill Bright and Vonette Bright, their contract that they made with God surrendering their lives.

They wrote it out and they gave God their lives. And so today's going to be a great day because we have David Robbins and his wife Meg with us, who is the president of Family Life. So welcome to Family Life today, guys.

Thanks so much. Good to be here. And we have you here on a pretty important month in the yearly calendar of Family Life. Tell us why it's a critical month, David. 40% of our donations for the entire year come in this month. These 30 days determine how Family Life will be able to fuel ministry over the course of the next 12 months.

And so, as you can imagine, we've had to make some tough calls over this last year. And we're hoping that through the generosity of people like you, we can continue to reach your home with timeless truth and gospel-centered truth around marriage and family, and that we want to continue to reach more homes. Help other homes pursue the relationships that matter most. And the encouraging thing is that we're growing. Our podcasts have been downloaded by almost half a million times around the world each month. And your gift helps fuel ministry to those homes and those hearts, and it makes it possible. So not only will your donation, it's going to be doubled, matched dollar for dollar, but we're also going to send you a couple thank you gifts. And that's always a bonus, guys. Yeah, these are pretty cool thank you gifts.

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And you can do that simply by donating right now at familylifetoday.com, or you can even call 1-800-FL-TODAY and make your gift right now. Okay, let's go back, David and Meg, to your wedding day. Talk about that moment, that special day.

You know, what's fascinating about hearing you guys talk about your wedding night is that that same couple, Dr. Bill Bright and Vonette, his wife, inspired us too. We got on our knees and we surrendered and kind of signed a contract of our lives away to the Lord also. I didn't know that. So you actually signed something too. We did. We did. We had heard that they had done that. And really, a couple years before that had really been challenged to think instead of like writing out what we wanted our life to be and signing that away and asking the Lord to sign off on it. Like, what if we flipped that around? You've probably heard this challenge from them before, but what if you just sign a blank page and say, okay, Lord, what do you have for us? And we're willing to sign off on whatever you might write for the story of our lives. That's scary.

I mean, that is scary in a lot of ways, but I think... Wait, let me clarify this. So you actually signed a blank page.

There was nothing on it. Well, we had done that before we were engaged, like on our own. And then we kind of brought that together under that. We did sign a piece of paper.

We have it in a scrapbook. Joshua 1 16 was the verse that we felt like the Lord was asking us to trust him with. Wherever you send us, we will go. Whatever you command us to do, we will do. That was the people's response to Joshua when the Lord gave him the mantle of leadership from Moses. And that was our heart's desire before the Lord.

Blank sheet of paper. We want to keep that going together, not mess that up, because there's a lot of joy when you follow him like that. And we've experienced that in our singleness.

And so we want to experience that together. You know, what's interesting is the blank sheet of paper. I didn't know that. I've never heard that. I mean, I've only heard of one other person talking about that. But I mean, we sort of signed a contract that said, we're expecting you to do this, this and this.

I'm kidding in a sense. But I think most of us, when we come to Christ, we do have an expectation. This is what it'll look like. Even, you know, and I was joking earlier, as a pastor, I've done several hundred weddings. And as you get to better for worse, you know, richer for poorer, you look at the couple and you know they're thinking it's better and it's richer.

They're not thinking worse and poorer. And yet as a seasoned marriage veteran, in a sense, you sort of smile knowing you understand, but a lot of this vow is going to be fleshed out. That's what you signed a blank sheet, meaning if it's for worse, or if it's poor, we're in.

Talk about that, because that isn't what everybody signs up for. Yeah, I mean, I think you're right that I think when we're when you're standing there in that moment, you know, I can remember so many details about that day. Thankfully, I'm glad I can remember it. But, you know, there were not paper cups. I will say that. And it did say Pepsi on it.

I just want you to know that. Were those sponsored and for free? They were free, yes. And it was at the Westmore Club, which was a swimming tennis club that dad was part owner of.

He went to the pool concession stand to get the cups. I'll have to say you can spend all the money you want on your wedding or spend nothing. It has really very little relevance to how your wedding's going or how your marriage is going to end up. I mean, we really spent probably less than five. And here we are.

But you're right. Like in that moment, you're thinking everything's going to be amazing. You know, I mean, this is the just the beginning of all the other amazing days like this.

But we all know on this side, you know, almost 20 years and that's not always the story. Well, and I just think about that blank sheet of paper and I go, there was a sincere heart to it. And there was a reason why we were on our knees before the Lord wanting to give our lives to him and commit to Joshua 116 together.

It's engraved in our wedding band. However, the blank sheet actually just has exposed my selfishness over and over and over again. It's exposed how selfish I am and sometimes unwilling to follow what the Lord's prompted me to do until he uses it to draw me back into him. You know, as he says to me, David is is your life mine? You know, is it the Lord's and am I still committed in an ongoing way to that blank sheet of paper? And so it's a very practical yes, life comes at your heart. But there's also that continual invitation to the blank sheet of paper that God keeps shaping that's hard and beautiful. It's almost like we don't sign that paper one time. That's a daily kind of surrender.

Yes. So true. I mean, it's dying to yourself and what you're even your dreams. I mean, some of our dreams are beautiful and God given. And sometimes God cultivates those and sometimes we don't see those things become a reality.

But you're right. It's constantly saying, OK, Lord, whatever you have for me, whether that's today, this year, this season of life or our entire life. But yes, coming back to that over and over again, I think the Lord keeps bringing us back to that, whether we see it as the blank page back on our wedding day or just those daily moments of, OK, do I trust you at this level with whatever you have? You know, I've never and maybe and has I've never met another couple that had gotten on their knees on their wedding night. I'm not sure I've ever heard that. And again, I'm not saying it's like that unique.

Sure. But I think it's sort of unique. So take us there, because, you know, for Ann and I in that moment, we had no idea that that prayer in some ways would put us in this seat right here.

And I don't think you knew that either. But as you think back about that moment, do you remember it? Do you remember like deciding to do it and prompt you or was it something you planned?

How did it go? Well, it was something we planned. I bought this pillow that was like from Wal-Mart. I think it was a red king size pillow that would be like, this will be our prayer pillow to Neil on to Neil. It might have even been like a pregnancy body pillow.

It was huge. And I'm just you have this forethought. You're carrying that up to the wedding suite. I already know there was a little preparation.

I had it in there already. And it was a surprise. I mean, I mean, we knew we were going to commit to Joshua 116 together. But I was like, hey, before we do anything else in our marriage, I want to get on our knees together. But what's also true and funny is that I don't think we use that pillow another night. I had this vision of it being like a permanent, you know, in our closet, red pillow of prayer.

And, you know, well, we used it that one night and it was a great night. Meg, when you saw the pillow, did you think, oh, it's a prayer pillow? Well, it was on the ground. It was on the ground.

And you were pretty quick to say, that's a great question. What is this red pillow? You know what? We're making fun of you. But that is pretty cool, actually.

It's amazing. I mean, I didn't have a pillow. We just hit the hard.

No, my knees were straight. I will say this. It was advice from a mentor couple to the new husband. And if you're engaged, about to be married, get a small, thoughtful gift every day of the honeymoon.

That was, someone told me that in passing. What a great idea. And it made such a fun thing for a little surprise here or there. That is so true. And I think it might have been the same couple also encouraged us to pray every day. Like pray together every day in your marriage.

And we did not get on the pillow and pray, but we have committed to that. I mean, certainly there are days. But you could. Like, honestly, that's a great thought.

Yes, you really could. I think for us, we just kind of were in the habit of we pray before bed every night. And certainly there have been nights where he's out of town or whatever. But and sometimes it's super fast and we're exhausted and sometimes it's longer and we pray for our kids or, you know, different things. But I think that was probably one of the best pieces of advice we got and how we ended up doing that before. It's like a declaration of dependence and a declaration of really dying daily. OK, God, my day is ending. My life tomorrow is yours. And we always pray about the next day.

And I'm just looking at our lives. God heard those prayers. God heard that prayer that night. And I think often we can think as a couple, like we prayed, but God didn't do anything. But he does.

He hears those prayers. Well, I mean, in our situation, which may be similar to yours, it would be interesting to hear about your first year. But I mean, six months later and we've written about this and talked about it, we were really in trouble. I mean, we were struggling, but also questioning our decision to marry one another. Because we really were so disappointed in one another. It was like, do we make a big mistake? And even in that moment, you're thinking God didn't hear us. God's not answering.

He's not going to be able to use this marriage because it's not a good marriage. You know what I mean? Did you ever have that? You know, what's funny is our first few years were really it simplified a lot of life. We had dated for a really long time since she was a freshman. So we dated for three and a half years. And it was like, hey, we could actually live together and do this together.

This is awesome. So it simplified a lot initially and we had a great companionship. But then we moved overseas and all of a sudden a lot of in particular for me, a lot of the crutches I leaned on for my identity were kicked out from under me. And that is when I think it started being put to the test and just who am I and am I called to this?

What are my gifts? I don't even know myself anymore. And I had a companion that would continue to pray with me of helping me figure this out. And I'm so grateful for how Meg was really living out those vows when I was in a season that felt like obscurity and wilderness, you know? Well, I remember it was actually we were still on our honeymoon.

We'd been married a week and I had never had this before. I was young in my faith. They was young in his faith, too.

But we were coming on staff with Campus Crusade for Christ crew now. But I woke up in the middle of the night on our honeymoon with this feeling of God's in the room. I felt like this holy moment, so much so that I got on my knees beside the bed. Dave was asleep and I was just praying like, Lord, I feel like you want to speak to me. And I just had this impression in my mind to read the book of James. And I was young in my faith, so I'm like, oh, that must be like a happiness book, you know, in the Bible. And so the next day, Dave and I are talking.

I said, hey, I had this experience last night. I felt this impression to read the book of James. And Dave says, that's all about trials. Why would we be reading about trials in our marriage? Mind you, we had just prayed seven days earlier. Lord, we give you our entire marriage, our lives, everything to glorify you. And what a sweet gift because I remember thinking, why would he have us read that book?

Do you remember that? We read it on our honeymoon. James 1, consider it all joy, my brothers, when you encounter various trials. I wanted to stop right there because, you know, it's interesting, in 33 seasons as the Detroit Lions chaplain, I bet you we went through that book twice. And I had one of my players say, don't ever read the book of James again.

We always start losing whenever you go to that book. But I mean, it sort of prepped us, you know, to understand that there are going to be trials in our marriage. And there is a joy that is literally possible in the middle of it. But I think we lost hope in terms of God can fix us, God can help us, but he's not going to be able to use us. Because we sort of had a perspective back then, God uses the good marriages, you know. And people that go to church are good people and they're not sort of messed up. And the people that don't have pasts or they aren't messed up like we are. Yeah, so you sort of thought you sort of forfeited your right to be able to be used by God. And yet we found, man, he meets us right there and then he actually uses it because all the other couples are going through similar stuff. And they want a couple that's been there, right?

That's right. I mean, you look through all of scripture and God uses broken people that he redeems and restores. And then uses them as agents of transformation and reconciliation because they've been reconciled and can speak firsthand about it. And that's what all of us who are in Christ, we all have the Holy Spirit inside of us that he is doing this ongoing work. I mean, that second part of that verse, you know, of James 1, verse 4, so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. And I think as we think back to our wedding day and we think back to those vows, you don't think of all the trials that are coming or the poor times or the sick times. But yet it is through those times of wilderness or obscurity or suffering that you are shaped into the likeness of Christ. And we share in his suffering and are able to be agents of transformation to people around us.

None of us want to go through those seasons. Yet it's because of those seasons that we end up out of a really authentic place pouring out Jesus to those people around us. Yeah, I think Joshua 1 16 says, whatever you command us, we will do and wherever you send us, we will go. A lot of times we think of that in the physical sense, and I think it has meant so much to us over the years that God started us out in the beginning saying, Wherever you send us, we will go.

Because I did grow up living in the same house my entire life until I went to college. We didn't even move, you know, much less move cities. And we have moved a lot, and God's called us several different places.

And it's been hard to pack up and move, especially as we've had more children. But I think even more, it's even in the spiritual sense or the emotional sense, wherever you send us, we will go. Even if it's into the valleys and into the depths of places that are painful and hard and we wish we weren't there at times. But it's like, OK, Lord, we will follow you even to those hard places, because like David was just saying, those are the things that shape us. And we experience more of who he is, even in those hard, actually, especially it's not really even in those places.

I feel like when you're in the depths and in the hard, painful places, we experience even more of who God is. And I think, Meg, too, it's also as we go into those valleys, we are exposed as people. We really see one another. We see each other's weaknesses. We see our flaws. We see the past pain and how that has shaped us. And I think to love each other when we see the true, like, oh, I see your brokenness. And sometimes you want to run away from like, wait, I didn't see that on our honeymoon day.

What is that? And yet God is continually asking, can you love her? Can you love him as you see the flaws?

And that's not always easy. Is there a valley that you remember? Can you take us through one that was really hard for you in your marriage, maybe? I think back to that time in Italy where Meg was amazing at language and her spiritual gifts were alive and well and flourishing in this culture. And like, I remember the day I put my palm pilot. Do you remember those? Oh, yes. Well, let's just say my personality, like, loved a palm pilot. You know, I was sick of that.

You would love it. So I gave, as my groomsman gifts, a sterling silver stylus space pen because this was the wave of the future, right? Like everyone was going to need a stylus. I think we should explain for people who may not know what a palm pilot was. That was like a digital calendar, like Google calendar before iPhones.

That's right. In your pocket. In your pocket. Revolutionary, you know, before the Blackberry.

Anyway. The black what? Blackberry? The Blackberry, right? Before the iPhone was a business phone, we were certainly dating ourselves. You're cutting edge.

Totally. And we're old. I think we just aged ourselves. But I remember the day I put it in the drawer and just was like this device of hour by hour. Kind of the way I like to view my life is offensive to this culture that's more circular and people want to invest all afternoon with you.

And it's offensive to go run to the next thing. And so I put it in the drawer and there was really a season of like, who am I? And what was being exposed was that I viewed God as a master, which is the right way to view him. The King of Kings, the Lord of Lords, the master of my soul. And I led us in our wedding day to we'll go wherever you want us to go and do whatever you want us to do. Yet in this season, early in our marriage, God was inviting me into more. That he's not just our master and I'm a servant. That he's also the love of our soul. And we are the beloved. And when you said valley, the reason I thought of this was that Hosea 2, which is right in line of this prophet who God tells, go show who I am by constantly pursuing and keep pursuing your wife that is going after other lovers.

And we all go after other lovers in life. And one of mine is how much can I do? Even how much can I do for the kingdom? And that can become a quick idol in my life. And in Hosea 2 it says, I will allure her into the wilderness. It will be there that I speak tenderly to her. It'll be there that she no longer calls me my master, but will call me my lover. And you just go, that is what God wanted to invite me into in that valley where I really, am I not called into ministry anymore?

Like it's pure duty when I was overseas in Italy. You know, just, I'm just scraping myself off to bed and going, all right, let's go live this out. Let's go tell people about Jesus. I mean, that was really what was going on in my heart. And I was, it was kind of this identity crisis happening of who am I?

And in that valley, God was inviting me to experience more of him and who he was. Yeah, I think another one that comes to my mind is just when we had three children. So when, after our third was born, our oldest was barely three. So they were three and under. I mean, you know, I think with the first two, you're kind of living in a fog for about a couple months, whatever.

With the third one, I think I was in the fog for like 10 months. But it was a tough time for me. I mean, I love our children, loved getting to be a mom, but they all needed me all the time. You know, it was physical needs constantly. And now we have teenagers and it's a totally different thing. But at that time we moved to Atlanta and David was traveling more.

He was in a regional role with crew. And that meant I was at home with the kids by myself a lot. And I realized I was starting to get so frustrated and bitter because I wasn't getting to do as much ministry anymore. I mean, well, ministry just looked really different.

It was investing in our children, but that meant changing diapers. It wasn't like discipleship in the way that I was used to on college campuses before that. And so there came a time when… Well, I remember driving to, you know, Wednesday night church, which we had not gone to a church that had Wednesday night church in forever. But we were like, whatever programs there are, we're showing up in order to send the kids to childcare for some time for us, you know, and with other adults. And I remember I just got back from a trip where I was coaching a campus and the couple that was in charge of that campus was having a pretty big crisis moment. And we had sent them off to some counseling and they'd come back and had gotten the report. And I was telling Meg a little bit about it and I just leaned over and I go, we're driving to church. I go, so does me talking that much about their marriage make you wonder about ours at all? And what I remember is that Meg just let out a huh.

I go, oh, we'll talk about that after church. Well, I mean, that may have been a slight exaggeration. I probably did say that. It might have been worse.

It probably was worse. But I was I mean, I was feeling that way. And I think there were little things that I realized were starting to bother me so much that shouldn't have. Like David would say, oh, I'll be home at 615 and at any time after any minute after 615. And I was coming undone, partly because, you know, as a mom, you're surviving all day and you're thinking, this is my moment.

I am tracking. Thank you. And, you know, six, 16, six, 17, six, 30. And I am fuming by the time he gets home. I realize, like I was letting so much of that build up and it was creating such division. And and yes.

So when he asked me that, that was just one example of things that I was getting overly angry about. And I was like, yeah, we do. We need to really talk about how this is affecting us. New season of life.

Three small children. You're traveling a lot. And OK, but what's happening between us, you know, and how do we work through that? Like it was a valley just created by circumstances. But my sin was totally getting in the way and not going to him and talking it out and having honest conversations about, hey, just don't tell me what time you're going to be home because a lot better if you just say, let alone pull in the driveway and stay on your phone for 10 more minutes. That was the worst. That was bad. Even in that season, you know, it was small, simple steps.

There was nothing dramatic. But there was a OK, let's own this. You're saying prayer on your wedding night. We want a great marriage, not just a good marriage. And I remember one of the simple steps we took was I'd instead of going on Wednesday nights and going to hang out with other adults eating dinner.

Let's go to that marriage group. And it ended up being a really safe place. That was one of the things God used to restore us in that season. And, you know, as I'm listening, I'm thinking your valley is your vehicle. You know, as a preacher, it came to my mind. We've often said your pain is your purpose. And I was thinking, as you talk about that and we've talked about our valleys, it's amazing how God often meets us there, but then says, I actually want to use this moment, this season, to help other families that are going through it.

I mean, we didn't talk about this, but it came to my mind. I love this passage. It's one of the verses I didn't understand for years and now I think I sort of do. 2 Corinthians 1, 3, where Paul writes, Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort. Listen to this. Who comforts us in all our troubles.

So that's in the valley. So that. It's a purpose statement. It isn't just so he can comfort us. There's a reason so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. And, you know, when you're in that moment. In fact, in our vertical marriage book, we called the season you're talking about the shadow of the valley of death.

You know, when you have little toddlers in the home and you're exhausted and your wife's coming home late or your husband's coming home late and you're so mad because they're not there to be a partner with you and it's a hard season. But the thing we never understood is God will actually use that valley as the vehicle in your life to minister to others. Here we are.

We're sitting in a studio. There are families in that valley right now. And all I can say, and we already said this earlier.

Here's my application. Get on your knees together tonight as a couple. Ann said to me three months ago, we should start praying again on our knees at the foot of our bed. And we started doing it. I would love to tell you right now we're doing it every night.

We're not. But I tell you the other night I got, you know, we're in bed and I jumped out of bed and I went down to my knees. And she literally goes, are you on your knees?

Oh, my goodness. She runs down there. You know, it reminded me how much your partner wants to pray with you.

I mean, she literally jumps out of bed. We pray for 30 seconds a minute. It's not like this big thing, but it's like a bonding moment vertically. But it's horizontal because you're doing it together. And I think that helps you get through the valleys. So if there's anything I can say to a couple listening right now, get on your knees together tonight.

Maybe start a practice. And if your spouse won't do it, you do it. Because you can pray for you and you can pray for God's comfort to meet you in this marriage.

And I bet you God's going to meet you and then actually use you to help others. When we go through challenging seasons in our marriage, it really reveals where our hope is, where our source of strength is. Jesus said in the Sermon on the Mount that when the rains come and the storms blow, it will be evident whether your house is built on sand or built on a rock. And it's so important for us to make sure that we are building our relationship on the rock of God's word, on our relationship with him. Our friends Jeff and Sarah Walton have written a book called Together Through the Storms, Biblical Encouragement for Facing Challenges in Marriage. We've got copies of their book in our Family Life Today Resource Center.

For those of you who are in the midst of a storm or want to prepare for the storm, you can get a copy of the book. Go to our website familylifetoday.com or call us at 1-800-FL-TODAY to request your copy. Again, the number is 1-800-358-6329, 1-800-F as in Family, L as in Life, and then the word TODAY. You know, here at Family Life, everything we do is to help get you ready for the challenging moments you're going to face in marriage. Our goal is to effectively develop godly marriages and families. We want your marriage, your family to stand strong in the storms. We trust that these daily times together, as you tune into Family Life Today, as you listen to the podcast, as you take advantage of resources we offer or attend the events that we host, we trust that all of these efforts are helping you to build your marriage, your relationship on a solid foundation, on a biblical foundation.

Family Life Today exists to provide practical, biblical help and hope for your marriage and your family to effectively develop godly marriages and families that can change the world one home at a time. These last few weeks of 2021 are significant for our ministry. Hearing from listeners over the next few weeks will determine for us just how aggressively we're able to move forward in the new year to continue providing this daily radio program, the resources you depend on, the events that you look forward to. The real issue is how many marriages and families will be impacted in the year ahead.

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Again, donate online at familylifetoday.com or call 1-800-FL-TODAY. And be sure to join us tomorrow. We're going to hear from David and Meg Robbins about when they received the news that one of their children would be born with special needs. And we'll hear about how that impacted their relationship with one another.

I hope you can tune in for that. On behalf of our hosts, Dave and Ann Wilson, I'm Bob Lapeen. We will see you back tomorrow for another edition of Family Life Today. Family Life Today is a production of Family Life, a crew ministry. Helping you pursue the relationships that matter most.