A New Creation

Beckett Cook's life has been a journey that took him into some deep valleys and onto some high mountains, a journey where he experienced profound darkness before coming to a place of incredible light. At a very early age, I started to sense that I was attracted to the same sex. And that was kind of an odd sensation because it was very much frowned upon. And so I kind of had this like secret life. I was going to these clubs and bars and I just remember going to a gay bar for the first time and just feeling like, wow, like these are my people. When I moved to L.A., it was this very liberating experience for me because I immediately fell into this group of friends and they were suddenly becoming famous overnight. Now, looking back, I see that God was kind of protecting me from like that kind of success.

I was with my best friend and we we would go to this coffee shop and we would hang out there and like it was a beautiful like it was always sunny and beautiful. And suddenly we look over, we notice there's a table next to us and it's like five young people with Bibles on the table, like physical Bibles. And so we talked about their faith and I, of course, got to the sixty four thousand dollar question and I said, well, what is your church in Hollywood believe about homosexuality?

And I loved how frank and just blunt they were. And they said, well, we believe it's a sin. The following Sunday morning, I woke up and I was like, I guess I'm going to church today. And so I got to this auditorium, I walked in and sat near the front by myself. The pastor came out. He just started preaching for an hour and it was just like full gospel. And I just remember thinking while it was happening, just every word he was saying was resonating as truth in my mind and my heart. And I didn't know why I was like, whoa, like everything he was saying, I would be like, that's true.

And I didn't know why I was sitting there processing everything. And all of a sudden the Holy Spirit was like and just God overwhelmed me and revealed himself to me. And it was like in that moment, it was like in my mind, God was like, I'm God. Jesus is my son. Heaven's real. Hell's real.

The Bible's true. Welcome to my kingdom. And I was like, whoa. And I just started bawling and bawling and bawling.

And I was crying over my sin, but also over the fact that I had just met the king of the universe. This is Family Life Today. Our hosts are Dave and Ann Wilson. I'm Bob Lapine. You can find us online at familylifetoday.com.

We'll hear more today about Beckett Cook's change of affection. Stay with us. And welcome to Family Life Today.

Thanks for joining us. I think one of the first Bible verses I may have memorized was 2 Corinthians 5, 17. And I'm not sure where that came on my radar spiritually, but it's one of those verses that I learned early. If any man is in Christ, he is a new creature, a new creation.

The old has passed away. Behold, all things have become new, have been made new. And that's the reality of our story, all, each of our stories, that the moment that we become new creatures is different for all of us, as we've heard this week. But the reality of what goes on, passing from death to life, that's true for every person who is in Christ and who becomes, then, a part of God's family, a child of God.

Yeah, and I, you know, Bob, it's got to be probably a verse. If not all Christians, most Christians, we just love it. But I also, I get so frustrated because I'm brand new in Christ, and yet there's this old stuff that hangs around sometimes.

Isn't that frustrating? It's like, if the Holy Spirit of the living God of all creation lives in this temple, why in the world would I ever sin? But I am brand new, and I do have the resurrected power of Christ in me, and I want to live that life in Him. Do you guys remember being brand new, though? I mean, all of us can remember, yes.

I mean, I remember thinking, I am a new creature. I was so excited everywhere I went. I told everyone I saw, obnoxiously.

Like, it was ridiculous. I told my parents they were all going to hell, and we needed to all give our lives to Jesus. I read the Bible. I remember reading the Bible, opening it up, and for the first time, I got it. I remember reading the Gospels thinking, I understand it.

And you just are on fire. We've been hearing a story this week, a great story. In fact, I just want to encourage our listeners, if you missed any part of this story, go to our website and listen to what you missed or get a copy of the book we've been talking about, which is called A Change of Affection. Beckett Cook is joining us, and he's the author of the book. Beckett, welcome back.

Thank you. Beckett's story, From Death to Life to Becoming a New Creation, is a story that took you from growing up in Dallas, realizing as a teenager you were attracted to other guys. That became your reality, your identity. You moved out to Hollywood.

You were in the entertainment industry. You had a series of ongoing relationships with men, and one day you're in a coffee shop, and guys are having a Bible study at the next table, and you say, What is it you believe? And they tell you about Jesus and invite you to church, and God meets you at that church, and you become a new creation in Christ. And as you told us, you went home flooded with this sense that God is real and I'm now his child and understanding that that has implications for every aspect of your life. I mean, I don't think you fully understood it in that moment, but you knew enough to know, I can't just go on and say, Oh, I'll go to church again next Sunday.

Now back to the old Beckett, right? Yeah. So, how did you start to process that? I mean, you've just had a revolution happen in your life, and it's day two.

What happens? Well, I mean, fortunately, I had such a strong community at my church that just really rallied around me and supported me and prayed for me, and I immediately got plugged into, you know, community groups and small groups and Bible studies and prayer nights. Did you go to the church people and say, I'm new and I need help? Or did you just look for whatever activities were on the schedule and say, I'm going to that? I think the next Sunday, when I showed up again, they all realized that I didn't.

That's the guy who was a mess last week. So, as you go back to that church, though, do you tell them that I've been living a gay lifestyle? I think they all sort of knew because I had explained that to them at the coffee shop before.

So, yeah. You're seeing the same people that you'd seen at the coffee shop. They know God's doing the work in this guy's life, and they came around you and said, we're here to help. Yeah, and my pastor ended up becoming a really close friend.

We would meet once a week for coffee, and he would really pour into me. And people would just—I mean, I would get texts all day just from random people I didn't know, like, hey, praying for you today. And I'm like, what? And then I immediately started reading the Bible, and again, it was like what you said. It's just like every word jumped off the page at me. I mean, even in Deuteronomy and Genesis, it was like the Bible was a foreign language before I was saved. And then after I was saved, I could speak that language. And every word was like, whoa, I can't believe this is true. I'm part of this whole plan of God's redemption. So I read the Bible voraciously, and I listened to like five sermons a day from Tim Keller and others, John Stott and a bunch of other pastors. I would just listen and just—I mean, every time I would listen to a sermon, by the end, I would break down in tears, because I was like, I can't believe this is happening.

I can't believe this is true, and I'm part of it. It was like kind of self-education, but also like people supporting me. So the people you used to go shopping with on Sunday mornings and your old friend group, are they aware that Beckett's just had a nervous breakdown or whatever they're thinking? Yeah, that was a huge task to tell all my friends. Did you want to tell them or were you like— Yeah, no, I wanted to. I was excited to tell them, but I would sit them down one at a time.

It took me like three weeks to do this. And I would say, you know, I have something really crazy to tell you. And they would say, what? Like, are you moving?

Did you meet a new guy? And I'm like, well, kind of. They were stunned. I mean, they were all stunned. And it was a hard process to go through. And a couple of—there were a few people who were hostile about it, but most of them were very kind of loving about it.

And it was kind of like the thing of like, I'm glad you found your path sort of thing. What shocked me the most about it, because I just assumed, like, I'm going to tell them my story and they're going to become Christians like that, just like I did. And what shocked me is they didn't want to know more. Like, they heard my story, but they didn't want to know like, well, so what's it like to know God? Like, what's it—how can I know God?

What do I do? And no one really did that. And that was a huge surprise to me and a disappointment. Any of them try to talk you out of it? Yeah, a couple people did.

I had a friend who went to an Ivy League school. I told him my whole story. And he said, Becca, I studied theology in college, and this is not— you know, he tried to talk me out of it, and I was just like, you don't understand, like, you revere this kind of college you went to so much, and it's such a big deal to you in your life. And I was like, Joe, it means nothing. And that was kind of a weird moment, but we're still good friends. What about mom and dad and the siblings? I had to roll it out slowly, because it was so overwhelming to tell everyone. And so I just slowly started emailing my siblings, and they were just like—they could not believe it. They were blown away. They were crying. They would call me crying.

My mother was super happy for me. My dad was kind of weird. He was a little bit distant about it.

We never talked about it, because he heard it through my mother. And so I think he was under this misapprehension that I was, like, going to, like, a gay church or something. So, like, a year later, I was home for Christmas, and my dad was saying, oh, I'm having these pains and, like, this and that in the courthouse, and I fell down in the courthouse and blah, blah.

And I was like, oh, and I had never done this before. And I was like, well, let me pray for you. And, I mean, I was sincere, and I just laid hands on my dad. I prayed for him, and after I finished praying for him, he looked at me, and he was like, Beck, you have the Holy Spirit in you. I'm like, I know, Dad.

I've been trying to tell you this. And he was so, he was like, that's when it really hit him. He was like, I am so happy for you. I'm so happy for you.

And he finally got it. Did this jeopardize your career? Because you're in the entertainment business where to be gay is to be celebrated. To be a Christian is to be a suspect. Yeah, I thought it was going to impact my career, because when I got saved, I was working on a photo shoot. And, I mean, I told everyone on the set about my conversion. I told everyone about my faith. And every time I thought they were never going to hire me again, but I just kept getting more and more jobs and more and more jobs. I was on a shoot, and we were shooting in Malibu.

And the owner of the ad agency, she knew I was a Christian. And she's like, oh, we got to get this shot right now. The sun's going down.

The light's perfect. It would be a sin not to get this shot. And she's like, oh, Beckett, you know all about sin, don't you? And I was like, yes, actually, I do. And when I saw that, the entire crew turned and looked at me, and I said, what are the wages of sin?

Death. And I said, right now, all of you are dead in your trespasses, but I'm alive in Christ. And then I explained the gospel. And after I finished, they were just all stunned.

And the client, she just was like, I'm going to go get a coffee now. But they hired me again and again and again and again after that. It only affected me when the book came out a year ago. Hollywood slammed its door. I'm blacklisted in Hollywood now. So they closed the doors on me.

Is there ever a time in your new faith, your new walk of Christ, your new creature, that you tried to hold on to? This is who I am. I'm homosexual. It's okay with God. He loves me. I can still do this.

Or was it immediately boom? No. See, this is what the culture doesn't get a lot because it's so celebrated. No one hears the dark side of that life. It's a very dark world. I mean, if I told you stories of what I've seen and what goes on behind closed doors and what goes on at parties, what goes on, it's so dark. Even to someone who is living that life, it's just so dark.

That's something that never gets talked about. So I never wanted to go back to that darkness, that life. I mean, once I was in the light, I'm like, no, no, no.

I'm not ever going back to that for sure. What about same-sex attraction? So I always say this. The day before I got saved, my attraction, let's say, was at 100%. And then God had so much grace on me when I got saved, it kind of like slammed down to like 10% or less, 5%. And it's something where before I was a Christian, it dominated my thought life. It dominated kind of everything I did, sexuality did. Now I rarely think about it.

And so it's something I don't really think about. I'm happy to be single and celibate like Paul and Jesus because it's like I have eternal life. I have a relationship with the king of the universe. I have eternal life.

I could live under a bridge for the rest of my life. I don't care because I have this incredible relationship. And so I never feel cheated out of something. People always ask me, like, isn't it unfair that you have to be single for the rest of your life? Isn't it unfair that you can't be in a relationship? I'm like, I'm in a relationship with the most amazing man I've ever met. I love you. What's unfair is Jesus had to be beaten, crucified, and killed because of my sin.

That's unfair. My life is like nothing but gravy now. I get to be with Jesus for the rest of my eternity. So when you read the evangelical voices that are saying that same-sex attraction and following Jesus are compatible and we've misunderstood the Bible all these years? Look, the thing is people since day one for millennia have tried to justify sin in whatever way. And those people who are saying that, that you can be engaged in homosexual behavior and be a Christian, they're, I mean, for lack of a better word, they're deceived. It's just a deception and it's so incompatible with not just like the six kind of clobber, quote, unquote, passages in the Bible that deal with it directly, but with the whole story of God's, God created sex and he created sex to be expressed within this covenant that is safe and secure between one man and one woman.

And there's a reason he did that. He knows what's good for us and he knows how we flourish. And whenever we go outside that covenant, it's destruction. It's like unwanted pregnancies. It's STDs, which like for years I was terrified of. And I mean, praise God. There were so many times I could have gotten HIV, but I didn't. God protected me, I think, from that.

And not only just the diseases and the pregnancies, but also the emotional scarring of multiple partners and all that stuff and being exposed to somebody, like spiritually, physically, emotionally, and then just being like cut off after one night or whatever, one year, that has major, it takes an emotional toll on a person. And we don't even like talk about that or recognize that. I mean, we're recognizing it in the Me Too movement. But it's like, okay, there wouldn't be a Me Too movement if we actually lived in God's design for covenantal marriage. There would be no Me Too movement. There would be no diseases.

There would be no STDs at all. And that's what is missing from the conversation. And for us, this is at the heart of what we're all about as a ministry, practical biblical help and hope around marriage and family, trying to help people think this relationship, these family relationships, our gender, our sexuality, how we interact with one another, first in the home in a covenant of marriage and then beyond that in the broader culture. This is God's purpose for us in life is to receive from him the love he has for us and then to be gutters of that love into the lives of other people in a way that reflects the kind of love that he has. And I've gone to preach in here, but it's what you're illustrating with your life and with the passion that you're expressing. It is so close to the heart of what this ministry is all about that to be able to share your story with our listeners is a real privilege.

It really is. Oh, yeah. And when I listen to you, Beckett, I think you are 100% in.

You didn't say, Jesus, have half of my life, have three quarters of my life. You were all in. And I think that even for all of us as listeners too, when we give him everything, when we step out on the water and we just say, I'm yours, that's when he really has a chance to work in our lives.

Yeah. And the thing about obedience to God is it's such a joy to be obedient because before, as I said, living in a postmodern world, you don't know anything and you don't know what's good or bad. It's like when your parents give you boundaries, it's loving and it feels good as a child. And now that I understand the boundaries of life and of what God wants, I feel safe and I feel loved by my Father. I have so much joy in obedience.

Oh, it's obvious. You exude it. Yeah, the Holy Spirit is just alive in you.

And I was thinking, you know, it's funny that you asked your counselor, why am I here, and he couldn't answer. Yeah. And you just told us and your book tells the world and every listener, your story tells why you're here. And it's one of the Family Life and Crew foundational statements, to know Christ and to make Him known.

Yeah. I mean, the passion of you talking about knowing Christ and then you're living your life in a way to make Him known everywhere you go, whether it's on a set or on a radio broadcast, wherever you go, you're gonna make Christ known. That's your purpose. And I hope every listener goes, if I give Him everything, I'll know why I'm here. He's gonna reveal it to me, and if I will step into it, He's gonna use me like He's using you.

Yes, He will. You are writing and speaking. You've been to seminary. You got a master's in theology from Talbot Seminary. Yes.

And out speaking in places all across the country. We're just grateful you stopped by here, grateful for the book. Thank you for the time this week. Thank you, guys.

It was such a pleasure to be here. Beckett's book is called A Change of Affection, A Gay Man's Incredible Story of Redemption. You can get a copy. In fact, I'd encourage you to get a copy.

It's such a great story of God's redeeming work in Beckett's life and just reminds us of God's grace. Again, the title of the book, A Change of Affection, A Gay Man's Incredible Story of Redemption. Get your copy online at familylifetoday.com or call to order 1-800-FL-TODAY. Again, our website, familylifetoday.com or order the book A Change of Affection when you call 1-800-358-6329.

That's 1-800-F as in family, L as in life, and then the word today. You know, I love the opportunity we have here to wrestle with significant issues in our culture today, issues that have an impact on marriages and on families. Family Life Today's mission is to effectively develop godly marriages and families. We are committed to providing practical, biblical help and hope for marriages and families. We believe transformed families can change the world.

They're so critical to the ongoing health of any culture, any civilization. And you, as a listener, help make that happen when, first of all, you tell other people about Family Life Today, maybe pass on a link to the podcast that you've listened to today, and then secondly, when you help support this ministry, the cost of producing and syndicating Family Life Today is a cost that is covered by friends of this ministry who donate so that Family Life Today can be heard by more people more often. If you're able to help with a donation today, we'd love to say thank you for your support by sending you a copy of a new book I've written called Love Like You Mean It. It's a book about marriage. We actually look at 1 Corinthians 13, the characteristics of love that are outlined there in scripture and talk about what a marriage would look like if husbands and wives were patient and kind, not self-seeking, not insisting on their own way. All of these character qualities apply to the marriage relationship, and that's what we talk about in this book. The book is our thank you gift to you when you go online today to familylifetoday.com to make a donation, or call 1-800-FL-TODAY and donate over the phone.

Thanks in advance for whatever you're able to do to support this program, and I hope you enjoy the book Love Like You Mean It. I also hope you can join us back again tomorrow when we're going to talk with author and speaker Shelby Abbott about how we should respond when we're wrestling with doubt. Instead of feeding your doubts and allowing your faith to starve, why don't you feed your faith and allow your doubts to starve?

It seems a little bit counterintuitive to think and feel that way, but it's obviously the way that we should be going, putting the weight of our faith into Jesus during the process of the fact that we're not sure he's going to prop us up. We'll talk about the right way to respond when we start to have questions about whether God exists, whether he loves us, whether his word is true. And we'll talk about what we do as parents when our children are dealing with those kinds of doubts. Hope you can tune in for all of that. I want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our hosts, Dave and Ann Wilson, I'm Bob Lapeen. We'll see you back next time for another edition of Family Life Today. Family Life Today is a production of Family Life of Little Rock, Arkansas, a crew ministry. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.