All of us have blind spots.
So that you can grow. See, when you identify what's wrong with you, then the word is a mirror. James 1 says, the word of God is a mirror. And when God speaks his truth to you, Then there's always something in the Word of God that will allow you to stand in the mirror of the Word, see yourself, and make the adjustments. Hello, and thanks for being with us for today's Destined for Victory with Pastor Paul Shepard.
Well, we've got a real treat for you today, a great story from Pastor Paul's own life, one that is sure to help you in your own walk with Christ. It's a story of change, confrontation, hurt feelings, and a relationship that could have been permanently damaged. That message is coming right up. But first, this quick reminder: at our website, pastorpaul.net, you can listen to Destined for Victory on Demand. There are also details there about how to download our free app or subscribe to the podcast.
Again, the website is pastorpaul.net.
Okay, let's get you to today's message from Pastor Paul when growth requires change. The Bible distinguishes appropriate anger from sinful anger. Remember what Paul said in Ephesians 4? Be angry, but don't sin. You say, well, what's the difference?
When you are appropriately angry, you can tell people how you feel, tell them how offended you are. This is not the way I deserve to be treated. When you said that to me, here's the way I felt. You can lay it out there, but your goal is reconciliation. The reason why you're sharing the way you feel is because if I don't get this out, we'll never get on the same page.
Because every time I see you, I'll be so offended, I won't even want to deal with you. And so the goal of appropriate anger is: I need to get this out, we need to talk it through, and then we can reconcile. That's the hope. Whenever that's your hope, and you speak respectfully to a person, you're not in sinful anger. It doesn't matter how emotional you feel.
You can raise your voice and not be in sinful anger. Isn't that good news? No, it's not sinful because, well, I know you were carnal now because listen to the, no, no, you can't tell by the tone of their voice.
Some folk get loud when they get angry. But they're getting it out and their goal is reconciliation.
Now, when you're in sinful anger, that's when I just want to get you told on my way out of your life. I'm not planning to stay. I'm not planning for us to be reconciled. I don't care what the will of God is for us to be united in relationship. I'm through with you, and I'm going to tell you off, talk about you, your mama, and everybody else.
And when I get through talking about all of y'all, then I'm gone. You see the difference? The goal is now reconciliation. I'm going to get you straight, and that's it. And so, you need to understand that this is very much part of a process that God has brought into your life, and He wants you to become enlightened about His will, He wants you to become enlightened about yourself.
All of us have blind spots.
So that you can grow. See, when you identify what's wrong with you, then the word is a mirror. James 1 says, the word of God is a mirror. And when God speaks his truth to you, Then there's always something in the Word of God that will allow you to stand in the mirror of the Word, see yourself. and make the adjustments.
That's why James said the word is like a mirror. You see yourself, you stand in and say, Lord, I just discovered some things about myself. Oh, that they're really ugly. But God puts you in the mirror of the word not to embarrass you, not to shame you, but so that, just like you did this morning, you know how you look first thing this morning. I gotta make this.
I gotta preach plain. You know how you look first thing this morning. You're cute now, but you were not cute this morning. And you went to the mirror at some point. And you saw everything that went wrong during the night.
Whether it was wrinkled face and hair going every which way, whatever it was, if you're a drooler, you might have had a little dried-up. Whatever it was. The mirror wasn't there to shame you, was it?
So your reaction shouldn't be, hmm, that mere tripping. I'm fine. I don't care. That's not what you want to do. You don't stand in the mirror and curse the mirror.
You stand there and say, oh Lord, I messed up. And you begin to get right in the mirror because the mirror is there to help you become. What you ought to be. And so God wants you to be in a process that enlightens you. And he'll use other people and use circumstances to show you about yourself.
To show you your blind spots.
So that he can correct some things and make you into the image of his son. And it can be a painful process. This process of enlightenment. God will expose you. He'll let some circumstances happen that will push your buttons.
That'll cause Jack to come out of the box. You've heard me talk about that before. Everybody needs to have your life cranked until Jack comes out of the box. Because you gotta get Jack out before Jack can become like Jesus. He can't hide in there.
He's got to come out. We got to know what the real deal is. And so it can be very much of a process. And growth in your life, when God's trying to grow you, He's trying to show you how big His plan is, His purpose for your life. He's trying to teach you to be more agreeable with people, He's trying to teach you to be more receiving and accepting of people.
He's trying to deal with all kinds of things. We come into the kingdom with all kinds of baggage. And just cause you're saved and spirit-filled doesn't mean your baggage is all gone. Come on, let's get our theology straight now. The Holy Spirit, I don't care how spirit-filled you are, He empowers you for service, but now He's also growing fruit.
And that's a very different process. You can't get zapped with fruit. You can get zapped with Holy Ghost's power and instantly do some wonderful work in the name of Christ, but growing fruit isn't a zapping thing. The fruit of the Spirit is cultivated. And some of us don't know how much patience we need until we get our impatience button pushed.
Some of us don't know how prejudiced we are until God exposes us to things that push our buttons. When our church first had radio broadcasts, it started out as a weekly. Radio broadcast. Years ago, we had a weekly radio broadcast, and it came on here in the Bay Area, it came on Sunday evening at 8:30, and it was the only station it was on. It was the weekly radio ministry of this church.
And so we were on Sunday at 8:30. I love that slot. Because we knew of some church people who listened and they would let us know, I hear you. And so we loved it.
Now we were very small ministry and all, but it gave us a degree of exposure we were very comfortable with. And so one day I got a letter From the general manager. He's no longer the general manager of the station. But at the time, he was the general manager, and they were looking to make some programming changes. And he wanted to keep us on their weekend lineup, but he wanted to add a syndicated national Christian call-in show as well.
So he wrote a letter in which he was asking us to consider moving. to Saturday evening. And he explained in the letter that there was this nationally syndicated program that aired on stations around the country and they weren't in the Bay Area. And he wanted very much to bring them in, but that they would need to take the time slot 7 p.m. to 9 p.m.
We were on at 8:30. And so I got the letter, and immediately I got a button push that I didn't know existed. I was instantly offended. Because I assumed Two things. Number one, I assumed that I was being bumped because I was black.
And secondly, I assume we were being bumped because we were a little local ministry. versus a big national ministry. I didn't know that was there until I got the letter, and until I saw myself respond to the letter. And I said, oh, okay, let me get this straight.
So the little black ministry Yeah. Has to get demoted to Saturday night.
So that the big national white ministry can come into the slot. And that's where I went.
So I sat down at my computer. And I wrote him back. And I can make my point very clearly. In case you don't know.
So in no uncertain terms I told him how offended I was by this.
Now, here's the problem. This is a man who at that point I had never met. And we had never met in person. But I assumed I knew it. Why he did what he did.
And my letter was based on the assumption. And it was pointed. When he got it, he wrote me back. And he said, if I'm reading this correctly, and how could you not? Good.
Because it was clear. He said, I am completely offended. That you would judge me in such a way and you don't even know me. And he went on to make his point very clearly. But while I was reading his response.
Two things were happening. I was reading his response, but the Holy Spirit was talking to me at the same time. And the Holy Spirit said to me, You don't know him. Why did you go there? Who told you that this was a black thing and a national versus local thing?
You just assume that. I didn't tell you that. He didn't say that. You assumed that, and you wrote him accordingly, and you were wrong. And he said, You belong to me.
You're one of my leaders, and to whom much is given, much is required. And I don't want you to just quietly, privately repent in your heart. You ever try to be slick with God? Do one of those little private, okay? God and I straightened everything out.
God said, I want you to get in your car. and drive to the station. and asked to speak to him, And I want you to walk in with a letter of apology and follow it up by an in-person apology. Tell him how wrong you really were. and beg his forgiveness.
Don't go away. The rest of today's Destined for Victory message, featuring Pastor Paul Shepard, is coming right up. Jesus said, I am the way, the truth, and the life, and no one comes to the Father except through me. That's why Destined for Victory is here to share timeless truth for victorious life and to show as best we can that Jesus Christ is the only one who can give us that life. You can help keep these messages coming your way all year round by sending a generous gift today.
Stop by pastorpaul.net to make a safe and secure donation online. That's pastorpaul.net. Or call 855-339-5500.
Well, when God asks you to apologize to someone, the only correct response is, yes, Lord.
Now, with the rest of today's Destined for Victory message, when growth requires change, here once again is Pastor Paul Shepard. And so I've dealt with God long enough to know that you don't argue with those kind of instructions.
So I got in my car, I typed up the letter of apology, got in my car, drove over there, asked to speak with him. walked in, gave him the letter, apologized profusely. And he said, this is very gracious of you. And I appreciate it so much. Please sit down.
We sat down and talked, and we spent 90 minutes. Getting to know each other. And I discovered There is a wonderful man. I discovered that he had a heart for God. I discovered that he had no racial prejudice at all.
That he had no idea Sunday night could mean that much to anybody. Yeah. And he said, Had you not had the reaction and instead, Just explain to me. Why you really wanted me to consider something else? He said, I would have heard you.
Because he said, you know, I don't listen to many of the weekend broadcasts, but I listen to yours. I like what you have to say. And you could have convinced me that I need to not let this. This development takes place because you've shared with me how strongly you feel about it. He said, I wouldn't do that for everybody, but I'd have done it for you.
And boy, did I feel small. But God used it to teach me something about our buttons. You don't know what's in you until God sets you up. Through exposure and then a process that's designed to enlighten you. It happens in marriage, it happens in covenant relationships, it happens in your dealings intergenerationally, parents with children, and all of that.
You don't know the junk until the button gets pushed. And then you realize, man, I have some stuff to work through here. And do you know we developed a relationship out of that? That is one of the strongest relationships I have. And let me tell you something: one of the reasons why we are now becoming a developing national daily broadcast, in large part, is due to this man's personal work.
He is our biggest fan and supporter. He has a lot of clout in the Christian radio world. And every time I talk to a general manager, the first thing typically they say is, Oh, I first heard about you, and he calls the name of my friend. Who is out there around the country traveling, and as he goes, he tells people there's a broadcast you need to consider having on your station. And he is one of my best supporters and a trusted friend.
And it started when I called him a racist. We got it. And we just call each other every now and then. He'll just call and say, Man, I just want to let you know you're being a blessing. I just heard about some station you're on, and the people talking about, you're just keep on going.
He encourages me, and I encourage him, and we just have a wonderful relationship. But you've got to let the enlightenment come. And so when God does that, you're in a better position now. to allow that to happen for others. A couple of weeks ago, I got an email And here is the first sentence of it, just to give you.
The context. I have been asking as many blacks as I know why they condone black churches, allowing people like Clinton, Kerry, and Sharpton to speak. in your pool pits. That's the first sentence.
So you can imagine where it went from there. And It was an obvious attempt of some gentleman who I believe to be Christian. I have no reason not to believe that. to try to engage black pastors. in a discussion.
as to his perception of black pastors and their endorsement of certain people. And he said later on in the body of the email: there are many I could have contacted, but I chose you. And I want to know why you all do that. And went on and on. The last sentence of it was: Answer me if you have the courage.
Now see, until I've had my own buttons pushed, you can imagine how I would have reacted. But when you've lived with God long enough and seen enough of your own junk, it helps you. as you deal with people and theirs. You don't become quite as judgmental. As you would be if yours wasn't being.
See, the people who are the most. Closed-minded are the people who aren't allowing God to take them through the process. But when you've been through the process, you can have a grace. God can offer you a grace. And I've been through enough where when I got that, at first it was pretty inciting.
But I thought for just a little bit as to whether I would respond to it, and then I decided I should. And here's what I said. I got that word from Jesus. Serious, when you look at Jesus confronting people who said very unkind things to him, he often called them friend. I said, friend, if you're really interested in learning the answers to your questions.
You should be less combative and presumptuous. I said, for instance, the language of your email assumes that all of your charges apply to me simply because I'm a black pastor. You don't even know me. You should have asked questions like: Are you a Democrat? If so, are Would you invite Sharpton or Clinton to speak in your church?
Where do you stand on abortion and homosexuality? He put all that in his email. that all of us just condoned all that. And other objective questions And they would have at least given someone like me the impression that you really want to learn from others. or at least respectfully debate some of the issues.
By contrast, the tone of your email was so antagonistic, it took me a great deal of grace to decide to even respond to it. I said, but I thought a reasoned response might actually help you rethink your position. And he wrote me back, and here were the first two sentences of his response.
Okay, I apologize. You're right.
Okay. See what I mean?
Now if I'd written him back and said wait one minute Some of the stuff you charge me in your email, I don't let anybody charge me like that. My mama wouldn't talk to me like that. I could go there, but we'd have no basis for dialogue. And what he went on to express after he apologized in his second email was a deep frustration. He said, I just don't get it.
When I see black pastors on TV and they're embracing these people who I know condone things like homosexuality, it makes me wonder: does the pastor condone gay marriage and all that? And I just don't get it. I'm just frustrated. And then I wrote him back and helped him put it in perspective. And I gave him some insight.
that he would never get. In his world, as to how some black pastors support the Democratic Party and all of that. Without talking to him about my own personal convictions and dealings, I gave him insight. I said, I know black pastors all over the country, and just about all of them stand shoulder to shoulder with any political conservative in condemning immorality. Condemning gay marriage and all of those things.
But we have learned, number one, that we've got to be real clear about loving people. And I went on to explain to him, I said that the dilemma for some is while they agree with the conservatives on issues of morality, they disagree on issues of social policy. And I said, because many conservatives are so high on the moral issues until they lack compassion for the elderly and the working poor and those sorts of things. And I said many of those people are in those black churches and those pastors love them and care for them. And so when they see on the one hand the supporting of all these moral things that they agree with, but on the other hand they see insensitivity, said it creates a dilemma for them.
And so I just put some things in perspective for him. And he'd have never gotten that perspective. Until we had a meeting of the minds. I want to suggest that we all have to learn to do that. It's a process of enlightenment.
And when you do it, the result will be what you see in verse 18, and I close. It says, when they heard this, after Peter enlightened them. And shared with them what God did. When they heard this, they had no further objections. And praise God, saying, So then God has granted Even the Gentiles, repentance unto life.
When you go through the process right, it starts with exposure, it continues with enlightenment, and what it results in is endorsement. You're able then to endorse what God is doing. You're able then to see a broader picture. And you're able then to say, Okay, I understand now that some of my issues need to be corrected, that some of my perspective needs to be broadened so that I don't continue to throw out relationships God could really use. I don't continue to make myself inaccessible to people who really need the benefit of who I am and what I could offer them.
And God blesses us then to be able to endorse His agenda because when it's all said and done, we all want to be in the will of God. When it's all said and done, God, I'm not nearly as interested in being right. As I am in being in your will. If being in your will means I've got to discover a lot of things about myself that are wrong, so be it, Lord. I'm willing to be wrong and then let you help me get right.
So that I can be in the center of your will. And if you go through that process, my brother, my sister, you will grow by leaps and bounds. in your life and in your relationship with God and your relationship with others. as you see that growth requires change and you allow that change. to take place in your life.
Do you want to be in the will of God today? That may require some change on your part, but there's no reason to be anxious or afraid. As the saying goes, God's will never takes you where His grace will not protect you. If you haven't already downloaded our free mobile app, now is a great time to do it. Search Destined for Victory at the App Store and listen to these messages wherever you go.
That's the Destined for Victory mobile app.
Well, Destined for Victory only exists because of friends like you, and when you give today we have a great thank you gift to share with you. It's our latest booklet, Clothed in Love Seven Gifts for the Ones Who Matter Most. In this message drawn from Colossians 3, verses 12 through 15, Pastor Paul challenges us to direct our best selves towards the ones who matter most. As you learn about seven powerful virtues compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, patience, forbearance, and forgiveness you'll discover what it truly means to honor your mother and how giving these gifts can transform your most important relationships. That's clothed in love, seven gifts for the ones who matter most.
Our gift to you today by request for your generous gift to Destined for Victory. You can give by phone by calling 855-339-5500. That's 855-339-5500. Or visit pastorpaul.net to make a safe and secure donation online. You can also mail your gift to Destined for Victory, post office box 1767, Fremont, California, 94538.
I want to let you know God has a plan for each one of our lives. It's a plan for us, a purpose for us. Ephesians 2.10 says, We are God's workmanship created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which the Father prepared in advance for us to do. That's next time in our Destined for Victory message: No Time to Waste. Until then, remember.
He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion. In Christ, you are destined for victory.
