Boys are taught you gotta win. We're not taught That losing has any virtue at all, just you're supposed to win. When you're on a bad team, you're ashamed of yourself for that. How bad we can't play, we can't win. We've been socialized, we've been taught, and it's been drummed into us.
You're supposed to be a winner. More than 60 years ago, Hall of Fame football coach Vince Lombardi said: Winning isn't everything, it's the only thing. Hello, and thanks for stopping by for today's Destined for Victory, where we feature the preaching ministry of Pastor Paul Shepard. You know, Coach Lombardi was far from alone in his sentiments way back then, and not much has changed. The question is, what is winning?
What does true success actually look like? We explored those questions today, so stay with us.
Now remember, you're always invited to pay us a visit online at pastorpaul.net, where you can hear any recent Destined for Victory message on demand, including today's. That's pastorpaul.net.
Now, let's listen closely to Pastor Paul's Destined for Victory message: Men Who Are Determined to Win. All right, this is. Father's Day 2024. I put that time stamp on because my messages are heard. indefinitely because of our media ministry.
And people may hear this years from now, but I want them to have the time stamp just to know it's a Father's Day message, but it will apply by principle to everybody. Uh but I um I wanted today to break into my series. I've been in a series all year on becoming excellent stewards, and we have covered four areas of stewardship. And here we are in June, and we've covered four of eight areas of stewardship.
So I got more to do. But I said today I want to stop and talk to and about men and dads in particular. Sisters, don't tune me out. I need you to help me honor and support men. Because here's what happens in church as well as in public life in general.
We get real hept up on Mother's Day, and we should. Mother's Day is wonderful because there's nothing like a good mama. That's the bottom line. And so it is a special time for us to honor, and we do it annually in general life as well as in the church on Mother's Day to support and thank God for the moms. And we also minister as we did.
My daughter did earlier this year, and I did a few years ago. I did a message on Mother's Day called When Moms Disappoint, because not all moms are wonderful.
Sometimes they kind of jacked up. And we have to address that. And we do it in this church. You know, we don't pull the punch. And because that's the way you minister to people.
You can't act like everything is wonderful all the time. And so we did that. I've also done that on some Father's Days. I did a When Dad's Disappoint back a few years ago.
So we try to run the gamut of encouragement, challenge, and addressing hurts and all of that. And so we do a good job with addressing mothers, but sometimes men don't get quite the recognition that they ought to. And I thought today I want to break into the series long enough to publicly thank God for and give a shout out to men who are determined to win in life. And so I have. Um I have titled this message, Men Who Are Determined to Win.
And I want to publicly thank God and publicly shout out men because not all men are rotten. Not all men are oh Lord, they so jacked up. A good man is hard to find all that stuff. I'm sick of all of that. Because there are some of us who don't fit that.
And some of us who used to fit it, we getting better. Come on, somebody. And so the church has got to honor. And lift up those who are on the right path. We got to get, we got to stop always cursing the darkness.
Yes, the darkness is there. Quit cursing it all the time. Celebrate the light. Find some people who are walking in light and make sure they know that they are worthy of honor. It's not uncommon for men to be obsessed with winning.
I titled this Men Who Are Determined to Win. That's not uncommon because all. All of our lives, we've been sort of socialized to be winners. In some cases, it started with T-ball or little league or whatever, playing in a winning. It's all about winning.
Boys are taught you gotta win. We're not taught That losing has any virtue at all. You're supposed to win. When you're on a bad team, you're ashamed of yourself for that. How bad we can't play, we can't win.
We've been socialized, we've been taught, and it's been drummed into us. You're supposed to be a winner. And we have focused on, many of us have focused on winning all of our lives, winning in sports. Um And winning, even if any kind of game you're playing, you want to win. You know, don't play to lose, play to win.
That's the way we've been taught as men. And when we grow up, we don't automatically begin focusing on more substantive things.
Sometimes, when a man doesn't grow up properly emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually, he will remain a boy in his heart. Just he's grown chronologically, but he's a boy in the way he lives his life. And the only thing that changes sometimes until we get him into discipleship when the church is concerned, the only thing that changes is when we can challenge them. You've got to put away childish things and begin to address adult things. But.
You've got to realize that men, if they don't learn what we teach it in our men's discipleship, it is easy for a boy to be a grown-up Christian. Chronologically grown up boy. And he's still a boy. The only difference is the price of the toys. The toys cost much more when you grow up.
'Cause I used to have match box I had the biggest matchbox car collection in my neighborhood. As a boy, them little matchbox you draw on the ground just pray. Oh man, I had every matchbox they made. It was one of my friends came from far and near to To admire my matchbox collection and play with me on the ground. And so if you're not careful, you grow up, and cars are still what you're playing with.
And it's fine. Good cars, I love, I drive a great car. I love great cars. But you better learn that life is about more than cars. More than toys, more than trappings.
You got to learn there's some substantive stuff. And so we are trying to address that. In ministries like ours, and there are many others around the world. I'm certainly not unique in that. But I just want to make the point that we need to be intentional about honoring men who have come not only to church, but come to be discipled and are learning and growing and becoming the men God has destined us to be.
And those men are worth honoring and supporting. That's my whole point.
So I just want to. Acknowledge and express appreciation for men who are about winning in what matters most.
Well, Pastor, what is it that makes one truly successful? Glad you asked the question. Let me answer it. It is found in the words of Jesus in Matthew chapter 22, beginning with verse 37. Matthew's Gospel 22, beginning at verse 37, Jesus said, Jesus replied, Love the Lord your God.
With all your heart. And with all your soul, and with all your mind, this is the first and greatest commandment. And love the, and the second is like it: love your neighbor. As yourself. Let me pause right there.
Love your neighbor as yourself. Love the Lord, love your neighbor. As yourself. In that statement, you have. three ways God calls you successful.
First, is by loving him supremely. Number one, I want to applaud and recognize and acknowledge men who are learning to love God supremely. Who love God more than they love anybody or anything else? And it's happening in our church and in churches, hopefully, around the country and around the world. We are learning that it is loving God that makes the difference.
We are commanded here to love the Lord. With all of our heart, all of our soul, all of our mind. We are commanded to love the Lord. It is an act of the will. You don't have to feel it.
We got to stop in American culture. Everything got to be about the way you feel. No, you can love because you decide this. This is worth loving. And you choose it.
Love begins with a decision. You didn't fall in love because you looked across the crowded room and you saw somebody, and your heart just went out to them. You don't even know who that is. Talking about you fell in love. How you fall in love?
You don't even know who it is.
Now you got to go across the room and say, hey, what's your name? You don't even know who that is. You don't love them. You don't even know them. And trust me, sometimes the more you get to know them.
Come on, somebody. More you get to know them, all them feelings that was in the room, the crowded room. You'd be like, oh, I didn't know it was like this. That wasn't love, that was infatuation. That was a feeling.
That's good. That's something that made your spine quiver and your liver shiver. I get it. But that wasn't love. That's my point.
Let's pause right there for a minute, but don't go away just yet. We have more of today's Destined for Victory message coming up next. We want to thank all of you who support Destined for Victory with your prayers and financial support. These are gifts that help us keep this media ministry going. And if you'd like to join us in our mission to take the gospel to all corners of the globe, please consider making a safe and secure donation at our website, pastorpaul.net.
or give us a call at eight five five three three nine five five zero zero. That's eight five five three three nine fifty five hundred. What does success look like in a marriage and family? Find out next in the rest of today's Destined for Victory message: men who are determined to win. You can't Love cause you looked at somebody?
No, you can admire them. That's admiration. Or lust. Or whatever it was, come on, it could be a little bit of everything. Stop acting like it was so profound.
How many have ever seen folk who when they first were quote unquote in love, you couldn't get air between them? They always, just always and then as soon as they had their first show not fight, They want nothing to do with each other. I remember a couple in Philadelphia, they had one of those whirlwind. They didn't come to church. They just fell through church just to let everybody see how in love they were and what have you.
And they said, we're going on a honeymoon. After that, we're going to come back and join the church. And they were all excited. They were broken up before the honeymoon was over. Got back and I saw the lady.
I said, Oh, so how is that? And she said, I am not with him. Say what? Uh uh he ain't nothing.
Well, you were so in love with nothing. That's because that in love thing. is a feeling, it's not a decision. And it's not based on knowledge. If somebody loves you, they will love you even as they get to know you.
Because they decided to love you. And they made the commitment. What is love based on? What's the foundation of it? It is: I am going to act in the best interest of this individual.
Whether I get some out of the deal or not. I have made a commitment to act in his or her best interest no matter what. That's why, of all the forms of love, agape is the love that counts. There's Eros, that's the romantic, that's the erotic love. And that's all.
If you're in a marriage, you know, do the best you can with that. But. Keep that going. It's not like it doesn't matter. It's just that you can't be based on that because when y'all get old.
You know, you don't have as much honey on the moon. Come on, let's be honest, y'all. Then them young, young, in them 20s, and all that, whoo, you can hardly stay off of each other. Good. Milk it as far as it'll take.
Yeah. But talk to some of these people who moved out of them into the 30s and 40s and 50s and 60s. And they and they found Yeah. I don't even want to hear what happened over there.
Something happened over there. Y'all had to tell me at the service because it's going to distract me if I know what happened.
So, just, I'm going to let that go. But let that go.
So y'all tell me after service. Um so Yeah. This church is crazy.
So The fact of the matter is, you should enjoy the eros, the romantic, all of that. Enjoy it. But you can't have that as your foundation. It can only be a feature. Yeah, both of us.
Good feature, poor foundation. Cause later on There won't be as much honey on the moon. You've moved through different stages of life. You have different focuses and all that. Hopefully, y'all will learn to keep liking each other all the way through.
And loving as an act of the will rather than as a function of emotion. Love yourself all the way through. We in my wife and I in these mid-60s headed up to towards 70, and we keep on hanging out. Let's go here, let's go there, let's do that because you gotta make it work. Because if you don't, You look over and say, Who you?
Because you've been living your life and haven't been paying attention to each other or doing anything that is of mutual benefit. And a whole lot of people and I see these old people breaking up now. It's like y'all have given each other the best years of your life. Where in the world are you going now? That's what I feel like saying to him.
Yeah. I told y'all I'm old. I don't care no more. I feel like looking at him saying, where? You go with your old self.
You giving each other all them good quality years? And now you're, I'm sick of this.
Well, you made it, dude. That's fair. Look like you'd find some grace. to keep on pressing on the upward way. But y'all do you.
I'm not gonna let bother you. But of all the love, so you got that. You got the phileo, which is the friendship kind of love. Good feature, friendship is good. In any relationship, it's good.
Good feature, have friendship. And that is wonderful. But you don't want to forget agape. Agape is the love God has for us and tells us to have for each other. This passage says, Love the Lord with all your heart.
Agape, love him because he is worthy of it. He is Lord of all. Romans 14:11, Paul said, As it is written, as surely as I live, says the Lord. Every knee will bow before me. Every tongue will acknowledge God.
Why do I love God? Because I'm going to acknowledge Him one day. And so I bow now, since I'm going to bow.
Sometime I choose to bow now. See, you can bow as making him your Lord now so you enjoy eternity with him, but don't get it twisted. You're going to bow.
So, you who are like, I don't care about nobody, you better care about God. Because you're going to answer to him one day. And you got to bow one day, so choose to bow now. I want to thank God for men who have chosen to love God supremely. We're learning that love of God is a decision, and it is the most important decision we can make.
And we're going to love him above everything else. Men know how to prioritize, all we got to do is make it spiritual now. You know how you know you like some teams more than others. Y'all have a team.
Some of y'all are hooked on a bad team. And you still hooked on 'em. I don't understand it, but okay, that's working for you. You love despite how pitiful they are. Good.
Bless your heart. Go for it. I am not. I am not one of those. When it comes to sports, I don't do that.
I find a team that's worth rooting for, and I root for them. I have a portfolio. I have pastored a number of pro athletes over the decades. I pastored a lot of when I got to California and the church started growing, I found. 49ers coming to the church and joining, and all that.
Hall of Famer, Bryant Young, I was his pastor for years and what have you. A number of them were in the church. I still contacted him not long ago. And I love those guys, but sometimes they said, Pastor, you're so disloyal. I said, no, I was with y'all when y'all had a decent season.
I rooted y'all as far as I could take you. But some years y'all drop me off too early. And I needed some other folk to root for.
So I just switched on over to some others. See, I got a portfolio of teams. And when one drops out, I still got a few more. The worst Super Bowl in my world is two teams I hate playing each other. That's not worth having a Super Bowl party.
Who cares who wins? Hate them both. That's how I roll. Just give me a wing. Just forget it.
Just. Thank God for men who are learning to love God supremely. More than they love anything or anyone else. You gotta love him. first and foremost and I'm Thanking God, I'm getting to disciple men who are learning to love God.
Supremely. If you want to be successful, a true winner in the eyes of God, strive to love Him with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength, and to love your neighbor as yourself. That's what winning looks like. You know destined for victory could not exist without the faithful prayers and financial support of listening friends and partners like you. You've been the lifeblood of this media ministry since its inception, and it's because of you that we can share the gospel of Jesus Christ with people all over the world.
Well, when Pastor Paul was teaching the group of messages we are airing now on Destined for Victory, he stopped right in the middle of it, took a one week detour, and inserted a special message that was weighing heavily on his heart. That message is called Sometimes You Have to Encourage Yourself. It's filled with practical advice, and as he always did, he delivered that message with his signature humor and down-to-earth style.
Now this message has never aired before on Destined for Victory. It's not available anywhere else but right here. But this month, in appreciation of your most generous gift, we'll send you this exclusive message as either a D V D or streaming link. Again, that's sometimes you have to encourage yourself. One of the last messages Pastor Paul ever preached, and it's only available right here for your most generous donation to Destined for Victory.
You can give by phone by calling 855-339-5500. That's 855-339-5500. Or visit pastorpaul.net to make a safe and secure donation online. You can also mail your gift to Destined for Victory. Post Office Box 1767, Fremont, California, 94538.
Even for folks you don't have a relationship with, you owe them kindness. The Bible says Jesus went about doing good. You can do good even if you don't have to deal with people on a regular basis. You can do good just because you serve Jesus and He went about doing good.
Well, that's coming up next time in our continuing message: Men Who Are Determined to Win. Until then, remember. He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion. In Christ, you are destined for victory.
