So that guy I met on eHarmony?
Yeah? We're out together last night and I step off a curb and snap! Heel breaks right off my shoe. Oh no! So I say hell with it, take them off so I'm barefoot and you'll never guess. What? He leans over, takes off his shoes and socks and now we're both... You're joking.
Amazing right? At eHarmony, you'll find someone you can be yourself with. Get who gets you on eHarmony.
Sign up for eHarmony today. Dana Lashes of Sir Truth Podcast, sponsored by Kel-Tec. It's his life mission to make bad decisions. It's time for Florida Man. So cops in Coconut Grove are seeking a thief who was wearing a Jesus saved shirt, but not him because he committed a crime. I mean of all the things to wear while you're committing a crime, that shirt, okay, this is in Miami. They're seeing a man caught on camera wearing a Jesus saved shirt. He was stealing, which pretty sure Jesus doesn't like, and they have got him on camera showing up to homes at like one in the morning and he stole one victim's vehicle. And they said that the Miami police are looking for him.
I mean, it should be easy to spot him. He's in that same shirt and all the video footage, so... A Florida storm drain trapped a 10-foot gator and triggered an urgent rescue response. And a storm drain.
Oh my gosh. It makes me think of that scene from It when the little kid's there and he's gonna float his little sailboat and you got It that's like right there in the storm drain. This gator, 10 feet, it was in Cape Coral. It took an urgent rescue operation. 10-foot, 6-inch gator stuck in this culvert. And the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation ones got the photo.
Can you imagine that popping out like sup? He was stuck though. They had to use a winch to lift the storm drain lid and then let the gator, let the gator go. They secured it on the truck and took it and let it release it in a safe area. Safe for the gator anyway, not probably for us, but that's okay.
Let's see. This Florida man was arrested because he was lurking around a bus stop. You know, that is a way to get beaten to death by an angry mom either with a shotgun or a flip-flop or both. Deputies arrested a Florida man because he was caught creeping at a children's bus stop. Polk County Sheriff's Office identified 37-year-old Jonathan Lewis who was a registered sex offender. He's being charged with violation of probation for failure to register and he loitered within 300 feet of kids.
No reason to be there. He's just creeping. And they took him into county and they booked him into a jail, Polk County Jail. He looks like a predator. And he's been a registered sex offender. He had a convention in 2004, a conviction, and they said that he was standing amongst the small children and everyone, the witness said something was not right. And so they called the police and deputies learned that he lived near their school, but he had no kids who went there, didn't know any of the kids who went there. Couldn't give him a reason as to why he was hanging out amongst the kids at the bus stop because he's being a pervert.
Why is he living? Honestly, you're a child molester. You should be put to death. I am 100% for the immediate execution of all child predators.
All of them. This guy, it is a failure of our justice system that this guy breathes. Moving on, this Florida man's story, he's a dirty burglar. He doesn't like robbing homes.
Dirty, apparently. He broke into someone's home and took a shower in Okaloosa County. They got a phone call from a destined homeowner at 5.30 in the morning on a Saturday saying a man broke through her glass bedroom door and she was able to hide in the bathroom and call for help. And they found, when Okaloosa County Sheriff's deputies arrived, they found 27-year-old Harrison Lee taking a shower inside her main bathroom. She was in the guest bathroom. He was in, I guess, the master, the bathroom on the side of the master bedroom. Or you can't say master anymore, can you?
Because everyone's stupid. But anyway, he was in the master bathroom taking a shower and they showed up and they led him away in handcuffs. He only was wearing a towel around his waist. He has been charged with burglary to an occupied dwelling, criminal mischief. Thankfully, no one was injured, but that woman had to be pretty terrified. Can you imagine? Like you're sleeping and a guy busts up in your bedroom. You run to hide. And then he goes and takes a shower. He's in your shower.
I'd have to clean my shower before I could use it again. That's nasty. That's just so nasty. Also, got a couple of other things, a Florida woman is charged with attempted murder because she stabbed a man in his male copulatory organ.
Let's put it like that. Stabbed him in his male copulatory organ. And witnesses said he was causing problems at the bar, calling the bartender vile names, being belligerent.
It was at a tavern called Big Ugly Fish. And the woman who's also a registered nurse, she pulled a knife on him because they couldn't subdue this guy. Stabbed him. He's 63 years old. She fled on foot.
Or he fled on foot. So man alive, I tell you. It is a big week and we're not just talking about Inauguration Day. Kel-Tec has officially unveiled their brand new pistol, the PR-57, and it's causing a huge buzz. Over a million views on the release video already. And you need to see why. Visit KelTecWeapons.com slash Dana today.
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Visit ForThePeople.com for an office near you. So that guy I met on e-armony? Yeah. We're out together last night and I step off a curb and snap, heel breaks right off my shoe. Oh no! So I say hell with it, take them off so I'm barefoot and you'll never guess. What?
He leans over, takes off his shoes and socks and now we're both... You're joking. Amazing, right? At e-harmony, you'll find someone you can be yourself with. Get who gets you on e-harmony.
Sign up for e-harmony today. Earlier today, first full day of Trump's presidency. Guess how it got kicked off? Well, they had the prayer service at the Washington National Cathedral, which is a fake church full of fake Christians and people dressed up like bishops who...
I mean, even Satan can quote scripture to cite Shakespeare. And I just want to play for you what was unleashed. The first, his first thing on his first full day. He's sitting there with his wife, with the vice president, with the vice president's wife, second lady. Listen to this. This happened at the prayer service in a supposed church. I ask you to have mercy upon the people in our country.
We're scared now. There are gay, lesbian and transgender children in Democratic, Republican and independent families. Some who fear for their lives. And the people, the people who pick our crops and clean our office buildings, who labor in poultry farms and meat packing plants, who wash the dishes after we eat in restaurants and work the night shifts in hospitals, they may not be citizens or have the proper documentation. But the vast majority of immigrants are not criminals. They pay taxes and are good neighbors. They are faithful members of our churches and mosques, synagogues, wadhara and temples. I ask you to have mercy, Mr. President, on those in our communities whose children fear that their parents will be taken away.
And that you help those who are fleeing war zones and persecution in their own lands to find compassion and welcome here. And for the love. Our God teaches us.
You know what? He also says, give to Caesar what is Caesar and give to God under what is God's. And he also extols extols people to follow the laws of the land and listen to your leaders. He also says that, too.
It's not an unjust law. This woman, first off, this is why I don't like women preachers. I don't like women bishops. And I don't think women have any place in wearing these robes and standing in front of a congregation and running their mouths like this. This female is the exact type of female that Paul was talking about when he said to be silent in the church, ladies. That woman right there.
Give me a break. You know what? I want to go back to John 2 15 for just a moment when Jesus talks about in the Gospels making when the Gospels talk about Jesus making a whip out of cords and just unleashing and driving all these people out of the temple courts. And it even says that both sheep and cattle. He scattered the coins of the money changers. He overturned their tables.
Matthew 21. He cast out everyone that was buying and selling in the temple. He overthrew the tables of the money changers.
He flipped over the seats that sold of those who sold doves. And he said, my house will be called a house of prayer and you have turned it into a den of thieves. This is the type of person about whom Christ was talking about.
Right here. Speaking on biblical untruths and trying to put it behind the veneer of scripture from the pulpit. Shame on this devil woman. And I'm going to tell you her punishment. When she dies will be more than you can imagine because you remember scripture also those that lead these ones astray, it would be better for them to have a millstone tied around their neck and thrown into the depths of the sea because shepherds and people who aspire to such a position are called to a high standard.
Unbelievable. And in this fake church, this church is nothing more than a coffin for a dead non-existent faith that they do not practice there. That church is a giant coffin. It looks real pretty, has its big columns. Has its paintings, its mosaics, its statuary.
But it is as alive as a cemetery. And don't think for one second that flipping over the money changers tables is an analogous to what this woman is doing. Oh, believe she is absolutely commercialized church. She is absolutely commercialized faith. She has politicized it. Let's pause for a moment about and let's think about it from this angle, the lives of the youth that you are ruining because you have a pederast fetish with cutting off their breasts and their penises and taking chunks of meat from their thighs to turn it into a meat sickle that they pretend is a male copulatory organ. Let's talk about unnecessary cosmetic surgery, what these people do to themselves that make it to where they have to be on medicine for the rest of their lives and the ideology for which this demonic woman is advocating is targeting the youth. Let's spare maybe a little bit of sympathy, woman, for the children whose lives are irrevocably ruined because the adults in their lives are chasing activism, advocacy and adjacent fame through that path than actually parenting and taking care of their kids.
This is evil. I would have stood up and walked right the hell out of that church service. I would have gotten up and walked right out.
I kind of wish Vance and Trump had done so. There's no way I will not sit and listen to false doctrine. I will get up. I don't care if I'm in church or not. I will get up and walk out.
And I'm going to tell you something. For the men that are in that church, they must be eunuchs because this is all they could get was her. There weren't enough men to do this. There weren't enough men who are trustworthy in the eyes of God to step up and take this position. So these eunuchs had to send out this devil priestess, seriously, to spit this poison at his so-called National Prayer Service. And everyone's expected to sit there and be polite because we're pretending that it has anything to do with God or faith. I don't know what faith she subscribes to, but it's not anything that I've read in the Bible.
She's preaching the perversion and abuse of minors as something that should be celebrated and protected. That's what a groomer would say. A groomer would say, no, no, these kids want it. They want it.
We've got to protect that, you know, because they want it. Every adult should be looked at with a suspicious eye that says anything remotely near that, like what she's done here. I have zero courtesy for her.
I have zero mercy. She should be run out on a rail like Elijah Lovejoy. Shame on her to do it. And that, well, it's not a house of God anymore. It's a den of thieves because she's commercialized it and politicized it such. I really wish POTUS would have got up and walked out.
I wish that he would have gotten up and walked out. And then this white demonic priestess. Runs down a list of chores that she apparently thinks only people who immigrate or who come to the United States do. What in the racist world is this woman talking about? Now, I know the left is racist. The most racist people I've ever met have been on the left. I've seen some of them on my own family. I have nothing to do with them.
They're on the left. Like she is. And she gets up there and talks about, you know, they clean this and they do that. And, you know, it said, wow, imagine being this female and you are so ensconced in your ivory tower that you don't know that people who aren't white can come to the United States and, oh, I don't know, create businesses. Some of them are a hell of a lot more successful than she or her family could ever aspire to be. And they come here legally because they're not dumb. They come here legally. And then they add to the great American fabric and they add to the tax revenue and they add to the skill set.
And they bring their own animating spirit, animated spirit of liberty. But all she sees is white and brown, white and brown. That's all she sees.
She is the definition of an evil white racist. And the fact that she's in those robes, look at those stupid, superfluous robes that she's wearing. It is a joke. It makes a mockery of church. It makes a mockery of Christ.
It makes a mockery of faith. And this is what they did. This this is the prayer breakfast. This is how POTUS and the vice president are expected to start their first day.
Hmm. I don't have enough nice words. I will say Vance's face is pretty funny. Did you see Eric Trump's face? At one point, Eric Trump, you could tell, my gosh, if ever there was a time when a thought bubble almost appeared like in real life over someone's head, it almost like. Apparated out of the ether and perched itself over Eric Trump's head, because you could almost read his thoughts on his face. He just said you could see it. I watched all every time it panned to him. I was looking at his face.
I'm like, oh, my gosh. But I would have gotten up. I would have gotten up unceremoniously and I would have walked right out. I would have walked right out of that service.
I really wish that POTUS and the vice president would have done so. Because they don't they don't deserve. To sit there like that and listen to that, nor does anyone else. And I'm not going to sit there and pretend that that has anything to do with faith or Christ or anything.
I'm not going to sit there and pretend any of it. If you're going to spew that poison to me from behind the pulpit. That's not church. That's a that's that's a not even a political rally. You're a rally.
You're just spitting poison and evil. I'm not going to pretend that we're doing this in the context of church. No, I'm out. I'm not fellowshipping with that. I'm not taking part in that.
I'm out. Not a church at all. No, that was a demon wearing sloppy robes. Masquerading as a shepherd.
She's a trans shepherd. We've got a lot more on the way. Oh, I have more things I could say about it, but I'm trying to rein myself in. With everything going on in the world right now, the economy conflicts, the open border, spiraling national debt, the devastating inflation. It's critical that you have a plan for diversifying and protecting your savings. And that's why so many, including myself, have turned to precious metals like gold and silver to help protect our savings. And I partnered with the top rated precious metals company Goldco to make that happen. It's a great company with a great reputation and they could not have made the process any easier. And right now, Goldco is offering a free gold and silver kit that will show you how precious metals can help protect and diversify your savings.
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Join thousands who trust Goldco visit Dana likes gold dot com. Recently, a new client called me and started by saying, Mr. Morgan, I really need your help, but I'm just a nobody. Those words stunned me and I immediately called him back and we're now helping him and his family after a terrible accident. I'm John Morgan of Morgan & Morgan. Everybody who comes to our firm at their time of need is a somebody. I grew up poor, but my grandmother was like a queen to us at Morgan & Morgan. Our goal is to level the playing field for you and your family at your time of need. The insurance company has unlimited money and resources. You need a firm who can fight them toe to toe for right at 30 years. We have fought them in courtrooms throughout America.
Our results speak for themselves and always remember this. Everybody is a somebody and nobody is a nobody. Visit for the people dot com to learn about our firm. Morgan & Morgan for the people injured.
Visit for the people dot com for an office near you. Finding someone that understands you is hard because you're human and there's a lot of different humans out there. E-Harmony helps you find someone you can be yourself with. You think no one would understand mourning a plant like it's a loved one or singing made up songs to your dog. But that's the type of person E-Harmony helps you find. Someone who makes you feel seen, heard and understood. Get started today on E-Harmony.
Get who gets you. And now all of the news you would probably miss. It's time for Dana's quick five. Oh, yeah.
All right. So champagne sales have sunk because people don't want to celebrate. You know what? Because they haven't they haven't discovered spritzes. They haven't discovered things like a limoncello spritz or a French 75, which is named actually after 75 millimeter guns are used in World War One.
But I digress. The champagne sales have sunk because people don't want to celebrate anymore. People aren't in the mood to say cheers. It's literally a study that came out that people are just like they're just they don't feel like super celebratory.
And they said champagne sales are down across the board. Is it is it generational? Steve, do you like champagne? Is it a generational thing?
Well, you can get some dry. Yeah, I agree. The most of it's like, well, it's like drinking syrup. But yeah, I don't know. It's interesting. A man pours his relative ashes in his in the mother's toilet for the love.
OK, there's Memphis. The man was arrested because police say he broke into his mother's home and put a relative's ashes in her toilet. The police responded. Adele Totten had broken into a window, entered her home and took the cremated ashes of a deceased relative, dumped him in the wallet. And then he took some stuff from the apartment as well. He's been charged with aggravated burglary. Here's the other thing. An abuse of a corpse. I didn't know that that's a charge that you could have applied to you if it has to deal with ashes.
Not that I was planning on doing anything, but that's just an interesting bit of trivia to know. You know, women are a woman intentionally started a house fire with Takis chips. Now, these are not that spicy.
Come on. She's accused of using Takis chips to start a fire with three other people inside. Now she's going to prison. Patricia Williams, first degree arson.
It was last year in Greene County. She'd just been sentenced. And she said that she used the chips because she knew they would support the combustion because of the grease content. And guess what?
She was correct. Man, how do you feel about those? I mean, nobody was killed in the fire, but still, good heavens. That's that poor chip company. A brain surgeon was let go by the hospital because he allowed his 13 year old daughter to drill a hole into the patient's skull. There's certain things that you should not be take your daughter to work day. This was in Austria.
A 33 year old man was flown to the hospital with serious head injuries in an Austrian forest. They did surgery. And then the unnamed neurosurgeon is alleged to have allowed the teenage daughter to participate. They got in trouble. And I just want to say thank you for making it happen.
Thank you. Now, here's what the media did. He's excited, right? Did you see him walk in to the event? God love him. I know he sends rockets to space and he does all this cool stuff, but one of the cool things that he can't do is dance. And he comes out and he's so excited. You can see how excited he is. And he's dancing and it's hysterical.
And the video's everywhere. So then he gets up and he's, you know, he's a hands arms mover. I get that.
I am, too. It's just how he is. He's just excitable. This is what CNN audio soundbite 22. This was the narrative.
They were pushing hard yesterday. I just want to look at that salute that he gave again. Just if anybody missed it, we'll just show it again.
He's just wrapped up here. You can hear the. All right. So we just we just showed that. We just showed that. Right. It's word salute. It was quick.
I think our viewers are smart and they can take a look at that. But it certainly was. It's not something that you typically see in American political rallies. No, no, it was not something that you usually would see. And it was quick. As you point out, it was very quick.
But it was it was in a moment of intensity for him as he came out dancing. And then he did that. He is a hero here.
And I just want to say thank you. This is what they're doing to him. This is what they're doing. And they're like, you see, that's it.
He's not giving a Nazi salute. You absolute idiotic bitches. I'm sorry for those of you who have very delicate.
Ears and you you're like, Dana, don't say that word. They deserve it because when you're going to impugn someone's character that way, you deserve to have brimstone thrown right back in your face and they know it's false and they're saying it anyway. They're trying this stuff again. I'm going to tell you people something. I've been doing this stuff since the beginning before the Tea Party.
Kicking off the Tea Party back in 2008. I am so tired of the everything I don't like is Hitler stuff. If that is all the analysis that you can offer, you're too stupid and ditzy to be on air to offer political analysis. It's shameful to watch other. I want women to succeed. I want women to be viewed as smart. But when these broads get on TV and they say stuff like this, you ain't doing me a lot of favors. You're not doing women a lot of favors.
This is stupid, petty Karen nonsense. He's excited. He's saying hi to everyone. He's not giving a Nazi salute.
You fetishists. Of course, these are the people that make apologies for Hamas, right? They're apologists for Hamas, but they want to see Hitler and everyone else.
Not everything is Hitler. But they have no idea how to cope. They have no idea. So you know what they're doing? Have you picked up on the difference in how they're interpreting this this time around as if compared to last time around? In the statement that she made. You don't see this at a political rally and everybody went wild for it.
And I don't believe that I'm reading too in between the lines on this. It honestly seemed to me like they were trying to impugn the characters of all of you. When he touches his heart, throws it to the audience. That's what he was doing.
Everybody claps. And these women, they're not just impugning Musk. They're impugning all of the people, the characters of all the people there and you watching at home. They're impugning. They're they're they're doing that for you watching at home.
I am. I'm going to tell you something. If they start doing this work, I'm going to go back to the Anthony Weiner days and I'm just going to go crazy. A double snakes wild on some of these people and some of them need to be confronted because this is ridiculous.
I'm not doing this anymore. My gosh. They've tried this nonsense six ways to Sunday.
And it's it is it's too much. But that was the narrative they were pushed. It was trending.
Oh, my gosh. Everybody was like a talking point went out. You realize that you've got city members of Congress who are Democrats who literally played at whites only golf courses until like maybe a decade ago. Ask Sheldon Whitehouse about that. Hell, Hillary Clinton was on stage. You know, her husband, Bill Clinton, played at a whites only golf course. And the New York Times in the 90s found out the 90s found out quite by accident.
And ran that hit piece on it and heard him. Interestingly, you've never had a Republican come out with a story like that, but there are scores of Democrats that have. If you want to have a discussion about bigotry, fascism, you know, all that nonsense. There you go. I'm just so tired of it. This is all I've heard.
This is all I've heard forever. And I'm just so tired of it. Find a new line of attack.
But this is what they did all day yesterday. Oh, my gosh. Elon Musk. Because he's a powerful new weapon. Now, I want to caution everybody here again.
And it's the Boromir test. I was watching the event inside when he did his he gave his speech and he had the swearing in. Someone said he didn't. One of the gaffes was that he forgot to put his hand on the Bible.
I think he meant to. I mean, he had his grandmother's Bible and then he had Abraham Lincoln's Bible. So he had two Bibles for good measure. But they said he forgot to put his hand on the Bible. But I was looking at all the the techocracy that was assembled. I mean, you had everybody there. I want to be real careful.
They were standing in front of members of Congress, too, which I thought was optically interesting. But I want to caution people. Don't trade big government in for big tech. Let's be there's a limit. You got to keep people on a short leash. This is something that has to be watched. There's a balance that can be kept. But it's a fragile balance.
But it must be kept. But the way that the media was going about this last night, they're going to this is what PBS. This is what PBS said. PBS tweeted this.
They said billionaire Elon Musk gave what appeared to be a fascist salute Monday while making a speech at the post inauguration celebration for President Donald Trump in the Capital One Arena. That is legit what they said. They wrote this. This is, again, PBS, PBS. We pay them.
I pay an ungodly amount of taxes to the point where I can't hire more people because I got to give it to the government to do this stupid nonsense. They write, quote, some elections are important, some are not. But this one, this one matter. They quote Musk. And then they said he puts his hand on his chest and then raises it in a salute similar to the Sieg Heil salute used by Nazis at their victory rallies. He touched his heart and threw it out to the audience. That's what he did. These people are asinine. Asinine. Thanks for tuning in to today's edition of Dana Lash's Absurd Truth podcast.
If you haven't already, make sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple podcast, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts. Finding someone that understands you is hard because you're human. And there's a lot of different humans out there. eHarmony helps you find someone you can be yourself with. You think no one would understand mourning a plant like it's a loved one.
Or singing made up songs to your dog. But that's the type of person eHarmony helps you find. Someone who makes you feel seen, heard and understood. Get started today on eHarmony. Get who gets you.
Whisper: medium.en / 2025-01-21 16:22:49 / 2025-01-21 16:35:57 / 13