Absurd Truth: VA Dem Click Here

Dana Lashes of Sir Truth Podcast sponsored by Kel-Tec.

It's his life mission to make bad decisions. It's time for Florida Man. Oh, do I have some stuff for you today?

All right. So first up, this Florida woman. Can you imagine like this being the headline for your crime and then like this, your mugshot with it? A Florida woman stole money from a cheerleading business to pay for her Botox. The cheerleading coach was arrested and charged with grand theft for stealing over $30,000 from this kid's nonprofit. Clay County cheerleading coach is accused of stealing money from her team's organization and spending it on Botox according to an arrest warrant.

Crush Cheer is a nonprofit and the money parents contribute goes towards uniforms and other operational costs. The arrest warrant proves that Herndon had sole access to the organization's account where she quote, used crush cheerleading funds to get Botox, pay for her personal cell phone bill, purchase Contra tickets, multiple Amazon purchases and more things that were not related to crush cheerleading business according to the warrant. Yeah, so Oh, she she also purchased some stuff at Big Lots too. So she's so in trouble. So in trouble. And they said that now they're they're having to they had to disperse crush cheer.

And the the organization they had to have the the court co directors create their own gym because they couldn't like actually continue. So she's totally going to she's going to jail. Also a woman wearing a Superman t shirt is wanted in Vero Beach. Superhero t shirt and her face is clearly visible. I mean, she's got like her eyeliner wing game on it's strong. After she walked into a Publix and straight up stole four bottles of tequila in three minutes. She placed two bottles of the Casamigos tequila on in her purse and then walked out with and took two others walked out without pain. I mean, you know, she's a superhero she should be able to find her they can't find her so they're there.

They're they're trying. A scene our Florida man was spotted by officers trying to board a plane in Orlando with a fake grenade and a real yet unmounted rocket launcher. The contents of the bag were detected by people with eyes. The TSA spokesperson said that the bag contained literally like a fake grenade and the rocket launcher and all this stuff. They said that it's forbidden to carry replica or real weapons on planes. They confiscated the materials and they let him go on.

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Did you have to clean your eyes and then go to church? I was really hoping you would. Bring it up today. You're hoping that's so sweet. So this woman and I mentioned this as a headline the other day, Susanna Gibson, she's running in the 57th district. It is a suburban Richmond seat and Democrats want to up in there all trying to undo GOP majority in the House, right? And she wants to get some money back to that House. And Democrats want to up in. They're all trying to undo GOP majority in the House, right?

And so they've been really targeting David Owen is the Republican. And then the Susanna Gibson, she's a nurse practitioner. She's got two kids. She's, you know, she's married. And then she also does something on the side.

So she, Golly, I hate some days. She and her husband engaged in private marital activities that she streamed publicly. And she would take requests in exchange for actual monetary tips. Now, the videos can be archived on another site. So she live streamed sex acts with her husband and then asked people for tips, money for doing requests, I guess. But that's that's not where it is, because we know it because they got out there, obviously. And then the response to this from Democrats, they've gone apoplectic. They lost their minds. They accused everybody of actual revenge porn. And then all the operatives, this is what they're saying. Like this chick is a senator in Virginia. She says, Glenn Youngkin's team leaked videos of Susanna Gibson to try to embarrass and humiliate her.

Okay, my I had quote tweeted this and I said, Wait, wait, whoa, how do you leak videos that someone willingly posted themselves to a public forum? And I ended it with der. How does that? I mean, I feel like I was listening. I've listened to my husband explain fax machine stuff to like our parents, and how to send PDFs to our parents know if my mom's listening, don't get mad at me. But you know how you like you're explaining how some things work to like your parents or your grandparents, right on the internet. And it requires a lot of patience.

I feel like that applies here. Because these people apparently don't know how the internet works. Like she's live streamed on a public forum. Much like I'm doing right now.

We're we're we have a simulcast of the radio show that also live streams on YouTube and Facebook. Much like that. She live streamed it. And then is mad because people saw it. Well, people, I mean, Republicans saw it and thought, Whoa, why are you doing this?

You're literally running for office and you're doing this. And so now she's accusing the people who have seen I guess or who know that she posted the sex acts on a totally public not private forum. She says that's revenge porn and they leaked it. That's not how any of that works.

You revenge yourself then. You can't leak something if you that's like when people accuse libs of TikTok of doxing people because she literally reposts something they already publicly post themselves. That's literally that's exactly the same thing here. So the Democrats are they're apoplectic. They are freaking out right now, because they thought they were going to be able to flip this seat. And my first thought is y'all didn't like vet your candidate. Right? Y'all didn't vet this candidate.

Y'all didn't go well, wait a minute before we get any further. Do you have any other social media accounts of which we should be aware? You know, any live streaming, you got to ask these people that, you know, the D's, you got to ask them this. These are the people that are like, yeah, we think it's totally fine to read about, you know, dildos to your kids in school. I mean, those are those people, by the way, can we didn't know if we could say that yesterday on air or not, when Senator Kennedy was reading that the genderqueer book, so we just did it and thought we would apologize after if there was any issue, but we did censor out the other thing. So you can rest easy now. Yeah, yeah. See, you couldn't get us so we could do we just we just ran amok, man. So I just, I mean, these are the people that are wanting to read this trash to your kids in schools, right? So you got to ask these people these things like, wait a minute, hold up. Are there any other accounts of which we should be aware?

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That's K e l t e c weapons.com. And now all of the news you would probably miss. It's time for Dana's quick five. Alright, so. So Smucker's I saved the tank story. I don't know why I kept that in here. It's my favorite story ever.

You miss that Kane. Remind me to share that story with you when we come back. So the Smucker people are buying the Twinkie people. The Smucker's jelly people are buying the Twinkies people for $5.6 billion. I'm just going to go out on a limb here. Grape jelly in the Twinkie. I'm just saying you're welcome.

That one's for free. Hostess saw its demand for Twinkie slip because they raised prices and they shrink the Twinkie. Don't tell me they didn't shrink that thing.

I remember when I was little. Yes, I was smaller. The Twinkie was a lot bigger.

Kane bagged me up here. It was bigger. Twinkie's got small.

So maybe they can they can fun size is a lie. Let's just be honest about this. We talk about this every Halloween season. Alright, so short stack went to commie land. Y'all know what that's about.

Kim Jong Un. He hopped on they made a big deal out of his fortified train. It's like 2023 and the short stacks on a train hopped on his giant bulletproof drab green train. And then he choo chooed on over to meet with pillow face McPootin. So the whole thing is just I love how they're like look at him.

It's they act like it's state of the art. He's stepping off his big giant train in 2023. His big giant train 2023. Just look at that out there. So did dog the bounty hunter? Did he actually take part in getting this Calvacante guy? Because he caught another dude. You know that right?

Like he actually went out there and like hunted another dude and caught him before like another most wanted guy. I just wonder because that was that was that was happening. Someone alert mom's demand red river of red wine is flowing through a Portuguese village after storage units storage units exploded the streets of a small town in Portugal this week at an incident at a local distillery. literal rivers of red wine flowed through an idea Portugal in the gutters in the streets is turn it all purple. They had a wine distillery located in the village and the wine river was calls when two storage units burst on Sunday. Why wasn't I just lay down in the middle of the street and just like a Shel Silverstein that that poem that he had about the lazy chick who wanted a drink and she just laid there with her mouth open as it rained.

I'd be like that with this wine flood. Just on days like today. The we told you got the guy who escaped from prison was it was caught came the story I was going to tell you an orangutan yeeted a possum at a zoo. Yeah, he straight up yeeted a possum. They think he killed the possum and then he like poked his head out of his enclosure to check it.

I was saving that one for him because they knew he'd like it. We got a lot more on the way. Also, why are they coming in? Now they're saying Sudafed doesn't work. It's because they changed the ingredients due to the meth chefs.

Stick with us. New York Post says that Sudafed they have the story Sudafed Benadryl and most decongestants according to the FDA's advisory panel don't work, which I think is a lie. Every now and then I have to take Sudafed if it's like really crazy cedar like fall and spring.

My voice sounds a little lower today because allergy stuff. I haven't had any like Sudafed or anything. But why are they saying that they go Sudafed Benadryl and most decongestants don't work? Well, Benadryl is an antihistamine. That's not a decongestant. And with Sudafed, didn't they have to change that ingredient in Sudafed because of the meth chefs?

Isn't that why? Because you had meth chefs buying it by the truckloads so that they could make meth. That's why you had to when you go to fill out whenever you had to buy Sudafed and you have to go to the pharmacist and you have to fill out a form. I literally would put death not for meth on there. Not no meth. Sign my name, no meth.

So annoying. But this now they're saying that the ruling may soon lead to them being pulled off shelves nationwide. Well, I guess they'll be going to guess they'll be going to the pharmacy down in Mexico to get my Sudafed.

Oh my gosh, by the way, you know, so case in point, I'm sure you know this. You know, you can get at the pharmacies down there in Mexico, you can get I've never I actually have not been. You can get all this kind of stuff down there, right?

You can get antibiotics, you can you can get the Sudafeds and all that stuff down there. And I had a friend telling me, Yeah, it's probably you know, cartel ran. And I'm like, Well, which cartel like the Mexican cartel or the FDA?

Like which one? Oh, wait, we're supposed to pretend the FDA isn't one because it's government. So that means it's virtuous, right? It's holy. So you can't criticize it.

Same damn thing. It's just legitimized by government. See how that works? That's the difference between the cartels and some of these agencies.

So they said that they should have like this one. So FDA, they said that virtually all over the counter. I this is that is such BS. That's such a lie.

They absolutely do. Why are they doing this cane? You're the tinfoil guy on this stuff. Explain it. They're looking at tussin.

Y'all gonna catch hands if you take tussin. They're looking at all this stuff. They say it's useless, useless at reducing nasal congestion. The Sudafed was good until they made him change it because of the meth chefs. What I really think, though, is that they're, they're setting this up for Big Pharma to have an answer. They're setting it up for Dana to go to Mexico and visit the pharmacy is down there is what they're doing. But they're going to have Big Pharma put out what is more effective than the stuff you can get over the counter.

And it's going to be more expensive. See, this is where I get so capital L libertarian on stuff. It's more I'm I get more libertarian than actual libertarians.

This is where my husband and I immediately part ways on the road of political ideologies. Because I look at this and I'm like, it does. I don't think Sudafed should have ever had to change a damn thing.

Number one, because meth chefs are doing it. Because you're always going to have that's the same thing. You're saying you got to ban all guns because some people are using them improperly.

It's the same thing. I hate that stuff. I hate it. You do you believe the government that's like cigarettes are healthy, but not this that government you're gonna let that government sit here and tell you what you can or can't eat. I don't know.

Should I take a bite of this? What is Uncle Sam said? Can't live my life without Uncle Sam.

That's like, you know, that's a form of slavery, right? Come on. I, I just, I'm not joking.

Like I may be maybe vacationing in Mexico came. I'm so not joking. I'm so tired of this stuff.

After everything with COVID and ivermectin and and you getting yelled at simply because you wanted a therapeutic and people are saying that you're taking horse medication and they're like, you got to take this vaccine that totally doesn't work. It's a clod shot. I mean, I don't trust these. They are their own. It's the American Cartel. Yeah, the Mexican cartels, you got the American cartels. And hey, yeah, the Mexican cartels get their get ingredients from China.

Well, how guess what? The American cartels help fund this stuff in China. So what's the difference?

Where is it? We don't vote for our We don't vote for our cartels either. Yeah, yeah, we don't get to vote for our cartels either. I mean, at least, you know, the cartels are like, we're here.

Unlike being facetious, somewhat, but really, where's the difference here? If they take this off? I'm no huh. It's not gonna happen. This is not good.

I'm not joking you like I will get into some prohibition type stuff. So they said that it's a it's the combat methamphetamine epidemic act of 2005. Pseudo ephedrine was available only behind the counter. So they replaced it with this. So they literally they it's the fennel. fennel offering.

They replaced it with fennel offering. So they literally admitted that they made pseudo fed suckier because they because other people were making bad stuff with it. So you have to suffer because meth chefs wouldn't stop being stupid. How is that my problem? It's not.

I hate that government judges your freedom by what criminals do. Well, this guy over here committed a crime. So you can't do this. Thank you.

Yes, I can. I'm not gonna write not for meth anymore. I'm gonna let them wonder. So what I'm gonna do. Thanks for tuning in to today's edition of Dana Lashes absurd truth podcast. If you haven't already, make sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple podcast, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.