Absurd Truth: Aliens Exist!!!

Dana Lashes of Sir Truth Podcast sponsored by Kel-Tec. It's his life mission to make bad decisions. It's time for Florida Man. All right, so first up, we got a few stories here for you. A Naples man capable of evading with a capable of evading high speed pursuit sticker was arrested for an unsuccessful evasion of cops in high speed pursuit.

Kind of didn't work. Collier County, Florida, 29 year old Florida man, motorcyclist, faces multiple charges. He tried to flee from deputies over the weekend. And he was also apparently, he had the sticker, as I just said, capable of evading high speed pursuit on his bike. And they followed him in the helicopter. He was running lights and all this stuff. He was going 110 miles per hour. And they they finally they got him and arrested him. So he was charged with felony high speed reckless fleeing and eluding and resisting arrest. So that's the end of the story. But the sticker was a lie. Let's see a Florida man barges into a stranger's home claiming that he's a ghost and you can't see him.

He is stark naked. There is also I hate to say there's also video. Yeah, so we can't really play the video because even because you know some of them doorbell cams, but he gets out there and he's like he's he said he he shows up he barges into the home. It was in Fort Myers, Florida. And yeah, he ended up they did call police. He could actually in fact be seen.

I don't have any other updates on him. But good heavens. This Fox 35 a Florida man this is this I get nervous when dogs are involved. So this guy crashes his Ford Ranger into a fire hydrant. He's got his dog with him. And then when the police shows up show up, he tries to get the officers gun but instead grabs his Jimmy. No, for real that actually happened.

That's Yeah, that's a gas station. And for trying to attack the arresting deputy. Damn that mugshot is hardcore. This man's eye is swelled shut. And he's making he's grimacing if you can't see it. For the people who are not watching the simulcast.

There's about 350 something on a Thursday last Thursday. Frank Clement Jr. He was standing near the trunk and appeared intoxicated. He said he'd been drinking he was advancing towards the deputy. They showed up after he ran into the hydrant.

There was all this water flowing in the street. They said that Clement advanced towards the deputy in a threatening manner and then batter the deputy that batters batteries, you know, grabbing someone by forcefully grabbing him according to a press release. Now, it said they witnesses said they it looks like Clement was trying to reach for the deputies gone. But he missed it by a little bit.

Grab the Jimmy. So I'm saying so he was charged with driving under the influence with property damage aggravated battery on a law enforcement officer resisting an officer with violence and also reckless driving. Now the one thing sadly that is not included in this is any kind of update about the dog because that's really what I care about. That's what we all care about. We had the one with that with the guy with the box over his head.

We had that one already. But I'm telling you, I want to know I do want to know about the dog. I think I'm like trying to find out any kind of updates on the dog and I can't like stop speeding and being drunk in your car with dogs and kids and anybody else.

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Tell them. Dana sent you. When you say crash retrieval, what do you mean? These are retrieving non-human origin technical vehicles, you know, call it spacecraft, if you will, non-human exotic origin vehicles that have either landed or crashed. We have spacecraft from another species. We do. Yeah.

How many? Quite a number. You're kidding?

No. The entire American public has been lied to for decades. Yeah, there's a sophisticated disinformation campaign targeting the U.S. populace, which is extremely unethical and immoral. You are saying to the human race, for the first time, an official intelligence representative at a high level from the U.S. government is saying publicly, we are not alone. We're definitely not alone.

Absolutely, the data points empirically that we're not alone. Yeah. Oh, yeah, I believe it. Oh, I totally believe it.

After everything that we've been through in the past, just go for like five, six years. Heck yeah, I believe it. Welcome back to the program. Bottom of this first hour, Dana Lasher, lovable curmudgeon with you.

You can listen coast to coast, stream the show, find us on YouTube or Facebook, watch the simulcast of the radio program on Channel 347 Direct TV as well. This is so this is the latest this that is out. We've been talking about this here and there, on and off for the past several months. Just you know, when stuff comes out in this great cosmic neighborhood of ours. It's a former Intel official who went whistleblower, and he gave Congress and the Intel community IG, Inspector General, all this classified info about all these deeply covert programs via the debrief.org. And he says that that they possess retrieved, intact and partially intact craft of non human origin.

Now, I just got to interject once here. There's one little voice in my head that's saying Dana, you mean to tell me that these aliens came from somewhere in deep space, managed to invent ways to safely space travel, maybe even go what we would call light speed or warp speed or whatever. To crash on Earth.

You know what I mean? That I mean, they didn't figure out planet landings. That's where I just have a little bit of people. Some people believe there's portals here on Earth, that there is no real space travel in a craft for a lot of them. There may be some in this particular atmosphere.

But as they travel worlds, they're using portals. Well, mathematically, that's supported. Right. Interesting. Oh, it is. Oh, yeah, it is. Uh huh.

I made the mistake of saying that that couldn't possibly happen one time in front of my youngest, who is this math and science whiz. And then he started talking numbers and symbols to me, and I just didn't even know what it meant anymore. So they say it's all of this has been illegally withheld from Congress. So he filed a complaint saying that he's already suffered illegal retaliation for this disclosure. The whistleblowers 36 years old David Charles Grush, decorated former combat officer in Afghanistan. He's a veteran of the Neo Geospatial Intelligence Agency, a thing I didn't even know we had.

Oh, we have that? The National Geospatial Thinger Agency Intelligence? They also have the National Reconnaissance Office.

That's, that's, that's a new thing. Oh, and he was the Reconnaissance Office's representative to something that we have called the Unidentified Aerial Phenomena Task Force, or what they call UAPs. That's what they're trying to call UFOs is UAP, Unidentified Aerial Phenomena. I would say weird thing that's alien in the sky. I just pointed to be like, that's alien. That's, that's.

So he was their co-lead for UAP analysts analysis and his representative of the task force. So you know, he seems like a pretty believable dude, right? He, there must be a lot there for someone to go, yeah, you know what, we got to tell people. Now, some people might say, well, if they exist, then where are they? Well, hi, have you seen us? We are a people that lose our minds over syrup. Okay, we lost it over who was on the butter box. Why, if you are an alien, why the hell would you want anything to do with us?

I wouldn't, I wouldn't even be in this neighborhood. This is why I've said this for years, they lock their little alien space doors when they fly past. Just saying, because we're weird. We're nuts. We are ridiculous people. We are a ridiculous species.

We're going bananas down here. So he's got a, he's got a lawyer, this guy's lawyered up. And he said that there have been all these recoveries of partial fragments through and up to intact vehicles that have, have been made for decades. And so he says, Yeah, there are some intact, we've got them. Yeah, we're looking at them. Are we reverse engineering them, I wonder? I think we've been doing it for a long time. You think so? I mean, I hope we are.

I mean, if we got some alien ships, I mean, I hope we are, geez. Can I just also add one thing here? And we got other stuff to get. But I think this would be a huge story if everything wasn't such a, oh, I don't know, say dumpster fire. Only now could you introduce a story. You could go out and be like, hey, aliens are real guys.

We got one of their spaceships. No one, no one bats an eye. No one's saying anything. This is crazy. If this was in the 80s, I think people would be going nuts. You'd have people making mashed potato towers again.

Well, it was just one movie, but still, you get my drift. I don't know. I mean, I would hope, I hope that it's an alien and not space travel. So let me just put this out here.

And then we got other stuff we're going to hit. But let me just entertain me. Just indulge me for a moment. My youngest is like, well, what if it's someone who's coming from the future? What if they figured out, you know, time travel, and it's someone from the future?

And both myself and my youngest think that that's probably one of the biggest letdowns we've ever heard. I would be horribly disappointed if it was some stupid human from the future. I'm sorry, but that's not I'm not impressed. Be an alien. Right? I've seen enough of humans. I'm done with you. Bring me an alien.

Right? When you be to you'd be like, wait, you're just from the future. I would be gosh dang. I think it's fair to say I'd be equally impressed. I don't know that I would be. I don't. I'd be like, go the hell back.

I think I'd be equally impressed. No one wants you. Go. The future?

Yeah. Tell me about how you got here. I don't want to know.

I like to be some mystery. It's the same question I'd ask the aliens. We have enough dumb people here. I don't need any from the future coming back here. So no, I don't want any of it. I will find your little portal and I will resist. I'd rather I'd much rather have an alien.

You know, make it spicy. Come on. Like I you know, I'm so tired of dealing with other humans. Just you know, let's it'd be better if it's an alien. Just saying. I don't care if it's friendly.

I don't want an alien. So they said insiders are taking risks coming forward. This guy's been in Intel for I mean, he seems like a legit dude. I gotta say. So if we have spacecraft that we're keeping somewhere the first place I'm thinking of is Area 51. You know, I did a whole thing.

It's a I have weird things. I want so one of my other bucket list vacations in addition to going to the north of France and seeing the World War Two, you know, all the beaches, etc, is literally just taking my picture in front of the gates at Area 51 and running away before their truck can run me over. That's all I want to do. I don't want to go and see nothing.

I don't want to hurt no installations. Just want my picture by the gate. That's a family Christmas card right there.

In my view, right? I'll just put some Santa hats on or something. But I read about how to do that.

What kind of vehicle you got? I've like done. I've read so much into that. It's crazy.

It's probably unhealthy, but it's interesting. But that's probably where they're doing it. You know that that's where they did all the nuclear testing. You can go and find you know, the house that's in the video that you see in all these music video. Well, you kids today don't know because they're they don't do they do music videos anymore.

I sound like I'm 90. Do they have the music videos anymore? It's on the TikToks!

Golly, I feel like mall Ingles Wilder here, mall Ingles. So I'm just saying it's probably you know, if I was going to put some alien ships somewhere I'd put it where it's real cold. Nobody wants to go up there or down there. Or I'd put it out there by where they did all the nuke stuff. All the nuke tests and all that stuff that house that you see and by the way I was mentioning in all those music videos that house that house was out there. That's where they did it. I found it.

I have it marked on my Google Maps as a place I'd like to visit. For real. I'm not even lying. That's an actual thing.

I have I love doing that. So I'm just saying now they have the National Air and Space Intelligence Center that's headquartered at Wright Patterson Air Force Base. That's the Department of Defense's primary Air Force source for foreign air and space threat analysis, which I didn't even know. And I looked at the building and it looked like something Iron Man would make. What's his face? Tony Stark. It looks like a Tony Stark building.

I'm waiting for an Avenger to come out the front door. I just find all of this fascinating. I totally believe that they would lie to us. I totally I I'm just assuming that aliens exist.

God never said they didn't. I'm just assuming that they exist and that we've been lied to. So there you go. So I'm not going to be surprised when they come out and they're like, Hello, Earthlings. I'm not gonna be surprised.

Just gonna take it and roll. They lie to you about a guy with his his crack smoking McCooker face on with all his kids. They lie to you about that. They legit try to undermine an entire election about that. Why wouldn't they lie to you about this? If they're gonna lie to you about the dumb things, you know, they're gonna lie to you about the bigger things, right? You know, they are.

So of course, I believe that course I do. And now all of the news you would probably miss it's time for Dana's quick five. So this interesting story from Reuters, Taiwan and the US to sign first deal under the new trade framework. Remember, there was an agreement that was made with previous lawmakers and some of those visits. Taiwan and the United States are going to sign this deal on Thursday, according to both governments boosting ties between the two while tensions increase with China.

The talks began. This was after Taiwan had been excluded from the pan Asian trade initiative. So nobody would make China mad. Well, now they said this agreement agreement is going to be signed. China is going to be mad. I don't care.

I really I mean, goodness, that's a whole other issue. This headline US women's soccer team lost 12 to nothing 12 nil to a team of men. Are they were they retired men? That's what I read that they were retired. Just saying. It was in rexham their soccer tournament. Lindsay Harris made some big saves. I thought it was they were playing retirement because it was normal man.

What you mean? We're just innocent man. It was a seven on seven squad for rexham AFC. If you haven't watched that rexham that's Ryan Reynolds and McElhenney. They both Reynolds and McElhenney purchased this the team and rexham, rexham AFC and they've been pushing fighting for promotion. It's actually an amazing, amazing story.

It's like a real life Ted Lasso in a way. But yeah, they got they got beaten, you know, just the same. Let's see Lulu Lemons, CEO. Addressed firing employees who tried to stop shoplifters. He said it's only merchandise. Okay, they fired two employees who call police as three masked men robbed their Georgia store location. They said that destroys a zero tolerance policy on engaging thieves. They fired Jennifer Ferguson and Rachel Rogers, a pair of workers who confronted them call police at their peach tree city location.

It was in the Atlanta metropolitan area. They said it you know, it's the safety of our team. It puts that you know, it may it they were saying that it's the safety of our team. You know, it may it they were saying that it makes a dangerous situation.

It's only merchandise. They said that we're not supposed to call the police or talk about it. That's what one of the the assistant manager had said.

Yeah, I think that's kind of weird. And also when you have four masked dudes into the store, are you sure that they're only just going to rob people? That's the other thing like what do you expect?

So like, it's only merchandise. But what if they're attacking? I mean, are they supposed to say are you just robbing us?

Are they supposed to conduct like, you know, a survey before the crime commences in order to gauge what the intention is? In Japan, people are signing up for classes to teach them how to smile after the masks because apparently people wear masks too long. No joke. That's a real story. Stick with us. Like sands through the hourglass.

So are the days of the United States. Oh, I know I was telling you that while I was muted, Cain. Cain's like you you gotta hit the mute button. As I'm telling him something I cannot say on air.

Totally not be good. You gotta hit the mute button. Oh my gosh.

If you guess that was our vice president of the United States, you'd be correct. Was she going through all the instruments that she's played or what? I'm not impressed unless she says she played the theremin.

I played the air instrument. That's what I said, Cain. What you said in Slack is what I said. Uh huh. Type it in there again.

Let's see if it stays in Slack. I'm just acknowledging I heard you. Come on, stop. That's all right. Boy, you're getting really testy one. No, no, no.

I'm just sitting here just, you know, watching, chilling, you know, hanging with the peeps where they were all wondering what you're talking about. I'm just, you know, speaking for them. That's all. Did you notice Kamala said to the students that she's looking at a bunch of vice presidents? Apparently none of them could be president. They're just vice presidents.

All of the students. Yeah. Why would that sounds? No, no, it doesn't. I'm looking at a bunch of vice presidents. Maybe one day, like me, you could get added to the ticket to checks and boxes even though you totally don't qualify for this office.

She laughs like in a deranged way. Just alien. There you go. We just figured it out. I'm saying gosh, I want that to be real.

I really want it to be real. I cannot leave that topic. I swear I'm going to, but I'm just, you know, can we I had this thing because my friend Dave Burge, who's one of the funniest people I've ever met because, you know, Apple, did you guys see the Apple tweeted, Welcome to the era of spatial computing with Apple Vision Pro, you've never seen anything like this before. And it's this dork who puts his headset on.

And like all of the Apple icons are in front of them. That looks annoying. So in order to do the Tony Stark with all the screens in the air stuff, you gotta wear the goggles, you have to wear the goggles, you got goggle hair, and you got to wear it on your face. You can put lines on your face. You got to wear the goggles, you got to wear the goggles.

face. That looks awful. And then my friend Dave Burge said that he was excited about this and he said that he all he needs is Apple socks, Pro and eye pants for the total Borg lifestyle experience. It's all he needs. Right? You can just sit in your someone else said you can just sit in your fluid filled pot and rest blissfully, rest blissfully in your well jacked into the matrix. They keep talking about the metaverse, which is glorified Second Life. It's glorified. It's glorified Sims and Second Life. It's dork stuff.

It met the metaverse is where the dorks go. Look at me. Look at my avatar.

Look at my little person. One of my favorite things to watch on YouTube is this guy called Daniel. And he goes and crashes all these like simulations. And he loves going after the people and like Second Life and all that. It's hysterical. That's the metaverse. That's what it that's what it'll be. Thanks for tuning in to today's edition of Dana lashes absurd truth podcast. If you haven't already made sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple podcasts, Spotify, wherever you get your podcasts.