I like things my way, my coffee, my schedule, and my treatment.
So I talked to my doctor about self-injecting with the Vivgard Hytrulo-Prefilled Syringe, which contains Fgardigamide Alpha and Hylaranidase QVFC. It's injected under your skin subcutaneously. It means I can inject in my space on my time. It's my treatment, my way. Visit VivGuardMyWay.com.
That's V-Y-V-G-A-R-T MyWay.com, and talk to your doctor about Vivgard Hytrulo, brought to you by Argenix. Dana Lash's Absurd Truth Podcast. It's his life mission to make bad decisions. It's time for Florida Man. I don't even know if I want to read this story, Kane.
Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. This story. Um A Florida woman says that her toes were amputated due to spider bites.
Oh my god. She sued the apartment manager. Her name's Patricia Shields. She has sued Grand Oaks apartment management. I can't even.
Why am I reading the story? Why? I can't do something like that. How does this happen? She's in Pinellas County.
She's suing. She said that she had to have two of her toes amputated. It was from 10 Tampa Bay News, Channel 10. She's seeking compensation. She said she noticed spiders within two weeks of Kare talk moving into her apartment.
This is the one thing I can't handle. I'll handle snakes. I can handle commies. I don't want to, but this I can't do. I can't handle anything.
You're fine with it. Or the I can't, oh my gosh, oh my gosh, I just want to curl up into myself and disappear. She, um She lost her home. She had to move several months after she lost her home to Hurricane Helene.
So she moved into Grand Oak Apartments in November of 2024. She said, I was happy and then kept getting bit over and over again. It was always in the bathroom. She has unable to verify the type of spiders that have been biting her, but medical, she's been to the doctor, all this stuff. They told her she had to amputate her toes or she could lose her whole foot and then maybe her whole leg.
She said she thought it was a joke. I. I don't even have words.
Okay. Would you not wear shoes?
Well, yeah, but wouldn't you I don't know spray? Or step on them. Or set it on fire. Maybe. Maybe.
I'd be going in there with my judge. Bang, bang. I feel like Frank from Always Sunny.
So, anyway, I start blasting. Oh my gosh, I can't. Oh, I'm so sorry you all had to hear that story because I had to read it. Uh A Florida man was jailed for trying to claim that this $115,000 stolen lottery ticket was his in West Palm Beach. It wasn't.
His name is Jawid Arib.
Sounds right. 26 years old, Jawed Arib. He was trying to claim it himself. And they said, it's not yours. You can't.
He handed over his AD in a ticket that was reportedly identified by its serial number. But then they started the verification process and they noticed that it was actually not a legit ticket. Uh and apparently he stole the numbers from the real owner. I don't even know how that is.
So he's in jail. That's a big, bad felony. You can't be doing that. You can't be stealing those. Yeah, you can't do that.
Uh, let's see. A uh Florida man was sentenced for a Fall River bank robbery. He had a paper bag written bomb threat. He um 41-year-old Domingo Agostini of Port Lucy, he's going to serve two years in state prison. He was sentenced because he threatened to tell her.
Last fall, or last year, with a bomb. He wrote it, he handed a paper bag note.
So it was a note on a crumply paper bag that said, I have a bomb. And he demanded $20,000. And then she handed over $5,000 and uh. A red die pack that exploded as he exited the building. That's actually super smart.
I love those things. I'm all about putting those in fake packages on your porches if you have porch pirate issues. I'm just saying.
So he was pulled over because they were able to easily find him.
So good for that. Good for that teller. Is that like a standard procedure with banks? Like, oh, you're going to take money from me. By the way, who always thinks they're going to get away with that?
It's 2026. Nobody gets away with bank robberies anymore. That just doesn't happen. No, that doesn't never happen. I don't know.
Let's see. A Florida woman was arrested. She spent more than $400,000 after she was accidentally overpaid by her employer. How do you overpay someone by 400? I mean, it was a lot of money.
Yeah, she was arrested after she spent over $400,000 that had been accidentally deposited into her bank by her employer. And then she didn't say anything, she just started spending it. She used luxury purchases. She bought a food truck for she bought a food truck. She sent $100,000 to relatives in Argentina.
Uh she purchased all kinds of luxury stuff. She thought she had just been blessed. She thought she had gotten a blessing. That's what sh that's literally what she told prosecutors. She thought she was she thought she received a blessing and as a result of it being blessing a blessing she didn't think it needed to be returned that's actually a very clever defense well I thought the Lord gave me this you know so who am I to question what he bestows upon me in the form of a blessing Very clever, but no, that's not how we're doing it.
You knew it was bad. You knew you were doing something bad, girl. You knew it.
So now she's going to the pokey. That's something. She's going to jail after all of this happened.
So, yeah, you can't. Apparently, it was reported in the local press over there. Accidental deposits are not considered gifts. Not a gift. Are you being lied to about your retirement?
I mean, the advice sounds familiar. Max out your 401k and your IRA and hand your life savings to Wall Street and just hope that the market cooperates. If that were the only way, why do so many people then risk outliving their savings? Why does the inventor of the 401k call it a monster that should be destroyed? The time has come to hear the truth.
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Visit Bank on Yourself. dot com slash Dana to get your free report. That's bank on yourself.com slash Dana. This is Rob Gronkowski from Dudes on Dudes with Gronk and Jules. Sunday mornings are sacred.
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Visit lifelock.com slash iHeart and save up to 40% your first year. That's 40% off at lifelock.com slash iHeart. Terms apply. Uh I listen to this stuff and I feel drunk, much like I felt when I saw the sound bite that just somehow auto-played. I wasn't looking for this.
It was in my mentions somehow. And I don't want to keep discussing it, but can I just, when I hear sometimes, and sometimes it comes from. you know, crazy. places. When I hear some of this audio sometimes, I think Oh my heavens.
We we have to address it because it's really that bad. How do I set this up? That I. Watch the thing for larger context. I just want to know why some people I I feel like they just really, um When you hear stuff like this, you wonder, do they really like America?
I kind of have to ask that question.
So Tucker was talking to his friend Buckley. And Buckley's a nice name. They really love the Uck names in that family. His friend or his brother? It's his brother.
Okay. Yeah, I mean, you can tell they have the same mannerisms. They kind of have the same vocal tonality, some of the same inflections. You know, I mean, Sibs, you know, you grow up. Um but they do love the Uck names.
And that family. And Buckley apparently is one that's like... I guess it uh 'cause it was what a brother Uh a son. I mean, everybody's buckling that family. Anyway.
It's a nice name. Anyway, so they had a um discussion. About freedoms and press, the press, and truth in the press.
So it's in the context of. The information that you can obtain in your country to determine the veracity Of news, right?
So it's in that context, because I'm not gonna subject you to five minutes of this just for the meat and taters of the last 30 seconds. But let's just go ahead and play this because I heard this and I went what? Go ahead. And specifically, we used to also talk after the Iron Curtain came down, had the same attitude about North Korea. Like, here are these poor, emaciated captives who can't leave their own country, who think these terrible and untrue things about Americans.
And it was only a couple of years ago that I suddenly realized I had this epiphany. Weird. North Korea. We are North Koreans. And so much of what the government has told us throughout our lives about big events and small events.
are simply not true. Not just massaged, but like 180 degrees from truth.
Okay, what the hell did I just hear? I mean, what did I understand? What did I just hear?
So we're like But in what way though? Um I think he was talking about the media, possibly. There has to be a better one than that. Come on, my dude. We got it.
We got it. I want all of them. I'll explain what that means in a moment.
Okay, so the sound bite is. Him telling his brother that America is the moral equivalent of not only the Soviet Union, but of North Korea, because. W because of our news media?
Well, we also have I mean, do they have X in North Korea? No. Let's just go ahead and ask the obvious. I can't even believe we're doing this. Let's just ask the obvious.
Do they have X in? I mean, they don't. No, they don't have X in North Korea. They all have the same damn haircut in North Korea. Everybody has the Kim.
They barely have electricity. They get fed to dogs. Oh, North Korea, we are just like the North Koreans. We are just blinking like North Koreans.
So I don't agree with that assessment clearly. I don't think that. Um That in any way we are like North Korea, even our media, even though I've looked, I've criticized our media for years and years. But we also have The ability to push back and correct the record. And I have been a part of that for almost 20 years now.
This idea, I mean, he's like, well, you know, we are blanking North Korea. You know, we are North Koreans. No, we aren't, though. We really are not North Korea and we're not North Koreans.
Now, granted, our legacy press has been heinous for some years. You know, I mean, Cronkite, all of them. I mean, they've all been biased and partisan, et cetera. But it also presupposes that the media in this country ever began as this holy institution free of partisanship, which is such a retconning of American history. And so I don't understand why.
It's it's the intimation is that It was once this like glorified and holy institution where no one had their own opinions and they only just wrote about the truth. That's never how the media got started in this country. Go back to the days of the founders and the penny presses and Ben Franklin writing under all of these different acquired names, whether it's Silence, Do Good, or whatever else. I mean, they beat each other up senselessly. In pulp, in penny presses, in handbills, and whatever, all the stuff that they passed around.
I mean, the early days of the press. Was propaganda. It was for the purpose of propaganda.
Now, I don't think it should be. I think you need to be able to have free people to freely write about what is happening in their nation because that practice holds people accountable, not a professional class. But the practice. The practice and exercise of writing about your government is the action of a free press. Just like I think everybody's a member of the militia, I think everybody's a member of the press.
I am very much subscribed to that whole Cole Campbell version of public. Journalism, which was laughed out loud back in the early aughts. They ridiculed him for that. And then he used to be the editor of the St. Louis Post-Dispatch, left.
I think he went to Florida. I think he was killed in a car accident. This is like a couple decades ago. The idea that everybody could write about what was happening in their own communities, and the people who could best tell those stories were the people in those communities. And that was really looked down upon by the folks in their saramans and their ivory towers that were looking down on the proletariat and saying, No, no, no, you have to have us professional class free press people write about what's happening in your communities.
The idea that this is somehow like a sacred priesthood of scribes is literally like a new invention of culture. This is not something that this is not based in any kind of historical reality. And so I think we got to correct that presupposition immediately because the people are the free press and it's the practice of telling those stories and holding your government accountable that is the actions and exercise of a free press.
So, that being said, to act like that we are all North Koreans because there's some kind of chokehold on information.
Well, if that were true, then why did we learn everything that we did about COVID? Why were we all sharing information about the zero efficacy of these injections that they had the mindlessness to call vaccines? I mean, where we were holding them accountable even then. You had whistleblowers coming forward based on the support that they were getting in social media.
Social media has done so much to actually make the exercise of press be fair and be free. You don't have that in North Korea.
So to compare us is just kind of asinine. To say that we're like North Koreans in that regard, you don't have sub stacks in North Korea, you don't have X's, you don't have Instagram, and even with And I say this as someone who actually has been professionally, negatively impacted to the point where if I wanted to spend a boatload of money and litigate, I would probably win. In fact, it was not a probably I would, but it take these are very difficult cases to prosecute. They take years and years and years and they drain you of cash. That's why so few people pursue them.
It's not for a lack of support. It's that lawyers charge you money and it's very expensive. And it's even for a wealthy person, you're looking at millions of dollars in litigation expenses. For a lawyer, that's worth it. That's what you look at.
So even with, as somebody who has dealt with being deplatformed, I've had my accounts throttled on YouTube and X. It's one of the reasons why, I mean, when I was with the NRA, I was pretty much obliterated digitally. That was my punishment for Working as a spokesperson for a Second Amendment organization, I was so negatively impacted. and so completely throttled. Every opportunity dried up.
Everything, I mean, because of my association with guns. And I was just throttled.
So I say this as someone that has dealt with this, with these platforms and these institutions, even with that. You are still able to get. News. Facts. You're able to get the story free of spin.
You're still able to get it. And you also have the discernment for intellectual people, you have the discernment. to be able to determine whether or not a piece that you're reading is factual or not. You don't even have those opportunities in North Korea. I know that it's a cutie little sound bite to say, um, we're talking about North Korea.
I get that. But it doesn't translate into any kind of realness. When examined, it falls apart.
So, why say stupid stuff like this? I don't get it. Like, why say something like that? I don't get it. Unless it's just like, you know, one in a successive A string of missives where it's just deucing all over the United States.
What's the purpose? of putting it in that context. without proper context. Wouldn't that make someone no better than the so-called gatekeepers that they're criticizing in terms of information? It does to me.
Look, it is used to, and I don't want to be mean, but just roll with me here. Used to, you would only have to worry about like your great aunt or your grandparents like clicking on links and having to deal with phishing attempts and malware because they downloaded something. It is not like that anymore. Every the crime online is so sophisticated and it is so easy to compromise your private and financial data, which is why you need to be as or more sophisticated than the people preying upon you. And that's where Webroot comes in.
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But the other cool thing about it is that it doesn't take up a lot of space. It's actually, it runs super fast. It doesn't take up space. You don't notice it. It doesn't weigh you down.
It's lightning fast, lightweight. I mean, you know, stuff like. Norton or McAfee, Webroot Essentials, Webroot Total Protection, all scanned six times faster, takes up 33 times less space.
Now, those things back, you know, the ones that I mentioned would be great in 2006, but this is 2026.
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This is Rob Grankowski from Dudes on Dudes with Gronk and Jules. Sunday mornings are sacred. I've got my game day routine. coffee, jersey laid out, and my lucky playlist. But the real game changer?
New morning uncrustable sandwiches. I've always loved uncrustable sandwiches, and now I'm all about the new flavors with 12 grams of protein. Bright-eyed Barry. Or Up an apple. Bright Eye Berry's got that flashy, finessey vibe.
Like your favorite slot receiver, up an apple. Tough and reliable. Like a do-it-all tight end. And players love them. Did you know teams crush over 80,000 uncrustable sandwiches a year?
They know it's good. It's a snack that can go with you anywhere, from the couch to the tailgate or even in the locker room.
Soft bread, yummy fillings, protein-packed. Once it's part of your ritual, you don't skip it. Easy enough for Gronk to grab straight from the freezer. Your new Sunday kickoff ritual starts here with the new morning uncrustable sandwiches. packed with 12 grams of protein.
Put all your gear on that you carry and then roll around on the ground.
Now get up. All your gear that's on the ground, that's what you're not going to have in a fight. Gun talk should be in your podcast feed. Check out Gun Talk Nation. What's it like to be blown up?
You know, if it's like C4, it's almost like a smack. Hunting. Yeah, we talk about that too. On your crosshairs, I like a thin crosshair. Hey Jay, you're really dating yourself by calling things crosshairs.
You're reticle, whatever. Have some fun and stay informed with the Gun Talk Podcast. And now, all of the news you would probably miss. It's time for Dana's Quick Five. All right here.
So first up This is uh Americans across three U.S. states were told to stay indoors because the air was filled with toxins that were carcinogenic, apparently. That's somewhat frightening. Thousands of Americans, apparently they were told beginning yesterday, Georgia, South Carolina, Oregon, stay indoors because they had elevated levels of PM2.5. I don't even know what that is.
Microscopic. particles. That were toxic organic compounds or heavy metals emitted from vehicles, industry, and wood burning, creating hazardous conditions. Uh oh, I didn't even know.
So are we breathing in metals, Kane? The heck. I mean, it's because the planes are spraying them in the air. Oh my gosh! Stop it!
What's happening? Contrails. Drivers are divided on the Wild American Autobahn plan to speed to pull speed limits on highways. I mean, I'm okay with that. Why wouldn't we?
Some of the roads, I'm like, why is this 55? This is like, it's anti-American and it feels communist. I mean, I really get very particular about my driving. They said that they want to turn eligible highways, not every highway, but certain ones, into American Autobahns, Kane. Sefante gets rid of the speed limits.
We all like to test the limits of our vehicles every now and again. I have a story of when the first time I ever went to California, as an adult and drove. I rented a charger. It was my run car. And I was like, moo, moo, and like get ready to tear out on the highway, and it was traffic.
It was heinous. It's just killed my soul. Anyway, the bill's called the Reasonable and Prudent Interstate Driving Act. It would set speed limits at 80 miles per hour and de restrict indeed. restricted speed zones after nightfall.
But I want it to be all the time, not just at night. I want it all the time. That's what I would like. I'm okay. I'm all right with that.
Beef tallow is risen to the top of the food pyramid. I like the new food pyramid. Beef tallow, new dietary guidelines are based on how humans actually eat. Isn't that nice? And apparently, jumping 50 times each morning could apparently improve your health.
Well, it's called exercise for a reason, people, forevermore. Stay with us. Supreme Court getting into the trans stuff. I can't believe it's even this far. Can I just cannot believe it's this far?
Okay, guys, we got to go to the Supreme Court. If you have a penis, you can't play on a sports team where all the players have vaginas.
Okay, it's just very you got a lot of differences. And I was listening to this one woman try to argue that, well, you know, it's actually bad for ladies who are big and don't and they don't have testosterone. And I'm like, those are dudes that are literally hormonally suppressing. what nature gave them, what they have been endowed with by their Creator.
Okay, you're artificially surprised. Don't stop it. Stop it. It was just weird. And then I always cringe whenever I hear Kentanji Brown Jackson speak because it's just like: if you wanted to know what DEI sounded like, it's that.
And she makes And I used to think Elena Kagan was not The most reasoned one on the bench. But she makes Elena Kagan look like a Mensa member. And Elena Kagan's not dumb. I just, some of the arguments that she's previously made, I've kind of scratched my head over, but. Um Sonya Sotomayor has been surprisingly moderate.
I can't believe I'm saying this. I mean, we're not best friends. Don't misunderstand me here. But Kentaji Brown Jackson, whenever she asks a question, She feels like a pick-me girl. She's like the kid in class who so desperately wants to impress.
The teacher doesn't really care how ridiculous she sounds or even if she's entirely correct. She's just pick me, pick me. But whenever she gets in there, she sounds. You can almost hear, I swear you can almost hear the other justices going. Yeah.
It's something else.
Some of the questions that she asks. Oh my gosh, do we want to do this to these sweet people listening here today? I do. Go ahead and listen. Here she is.
I don't, somebody explain what this means. I I heard this lot I just pl go ahead and play it. This is a kamala level salad. specification And so to the extent that you have an individual. who says what is happening in this law.
Is that it is treating someone who is transgender. but who does not have because of the medical interventions and the things that have been done who does not have The same threat to physical competition and safety, and all of the reasons that the state puts forward. That's actually a different class, says this individual.
So you're not treating the class the same, and you're not uh how do you respond to that? In other words, the as applied challenge essentially redefines the class, or one could think of it as that. And so what's wrong with that? What? Yeah.
Oh, we're all drunk. I feel like that's what drunk sounds like. That's what it feels like. You trying to make sense of what she just said is that This is Bananas B-A-N-N-N-A-S. She's defending men in women's sports teams.
And she's trying to say that what, well, because medical intervention, whatever, whatso have you, such as. Yeah. That maps girl sounded way smarter than Kentanji Brown Jackson. That because they created the situation, therefore they should be a protected class. It's the best thing I could muster.
Right. That's kind of yeah, that's kind of saying that before all of the hormonal and other things that that these transgender go as far as treatments, um, that somehow they're disadvantaged or not a threat when they haven't done that yet. I'm trying to get that. What? That's stop it That sounds so nuts No pun intended.
Say. Oh my heavens. Thanks for tuning in to today's edition of Dana Lash's Absurd Truth Podcast. If you haven't already, make sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcast. The new year brings new health goals and wealth goals.
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Save up to 40% your first year. Visit lifelock.com/slash iHeart. Terms apply. This is Julian Edelman from Dudes on Dudes with Gronkin' Jewels. Sunday mornings, I've got my game day ritual.
Coffee. Lucky socks. And now, new morning uncrustable sandwiches. It's all about that 12-gram protein boost with the new uncrustables, bright eyed berry, or up and apple flavors. Bright Eye Berries got a feisty.
Receiver energy up in Apple. Your classic do-it-all tight end.
Soft, pillowy-packed with protein, and easy enough. for grunk to grab from the freezer. Whether you're on the couch, driving to the tailgate or heading to the locker room. New morning uncruscible sandwiches. Are the MVP of snacks?
Your new Sunday kickoff ritual starts here. with new morning uncrustable sandwiches packed with 12 grams of protein. I like things my way. My coffee, my schedule, and my treatment.
So I talked to my doctor about self-injecting with the Vivgard Hytrulo Prefilled Syringe, which contains Ifgard Tigamide Alpha and Hylaranidase QVFC. It's injected under your skin subcutaneously. It means I can inject in my space on my time. It's my treatment, my way. Visit VivGuardMyWay.com.
That's VYVGARTMYWAY.com and talk to your doctor about VivGuard Hytrulo, brought to you by Argenix.
