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Absurd Truth: Greg Gutfeld's SPOT ON Rant

Dana Loesch Show / Dana Loesch
The Truth Network Radio
September 16, 2025 3:41 pm

Absurd Truth: Greg Gutfeld's SPOT ON Rant

Dana Loesch Show / Dana Loesch

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September 16, 2025 3:41 pm

A scuba-clad man robbed a Disney Springs restaurant in Florida, stealing thousands of dollars before swimming away. Meanwhile, a Florida woman punched an alligator to save her puppy, and a discussion on gun rights and rhetoric led to a deeper conversation about the left's role in promoting violence and the importance of individual liberties.

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Liberty Nation with Mark Angelides. Elements of the media are seeking to derail the legitimacy of the United States Supreme Court. What is on the docket? What can they do about it? And where is it all heading?

Find out on Liberty Nation Radio. Author, columnist, managing editor of LibertyNation.com Podcast host and conservative policy advocate. We dismiss history at our peril. Liberty Nation with Mark Angelides. Dana Lashes Absurd Truth Podcast Sponsored by Kel-Tec It's his life mission To make bad decisions It's time for Florida Man So I'm trying to I had a million of you guys Send me this story On X and Facebook and elsewhere This is from WFTV A scuba clad dude Robbed a In scuba gear robbed a Disney Springs restaurant and then just swam away.

Just swam away like Buena Vista. Investigators are searching for a man that robbed a Disney Springs restaurant by swimming up in scuba gear and a wetsuit and then swimming away after he stole thousands of dollars. He hit the Paddlefish restaurant after midnight on Monday after it closed to guests. And deputies say they found a man, said the man found a place to store his wetsuit and scuba gear before he walked into the manager's office where cash from the night before was being counted and deposited into a safe. He forced two employees to go to the corner of the room, said to close your eyes.

The report, they said, was heavily redacted, but he tied them up, stole between $10,000 to $20,000, and he left within two minutes. And they called 911 after freeing themselves. No one was hurt. He didn't have a weapon that he brandished or anything. And after leaving the replica steamboat, they think he put his scuba gear back on, jumped into the pond, and swam away, literally swam away.

They said he was in tight clothing and a blue beanie and he was slim for about five feet ten. That's a new one for me. I mean, it's not like they can say bolo wetsuit. You know, I mean, also, can I just add? You're in Florida.

You're swimming in a pond in Florida. Kane, what lives in Florida pond, sir? All the alligators. All of them. What do they like to eat?

Case in point A Florida woman punched an alligator To save her four month old puppy After it dragged it into a creek I would have literally gone John Wick on this thing And also opened its jaws Like that and cracked it open Oh my gosh four month old puppy She's taking it for a walk This is a creek y'all For my kin in the Ozarks A creek And a five foot alligator Bitter dog's collar and then try to drag it underwater. She punched the gator's eye. She said, I punched and punched. He kind of let go. His teeth were here, dragged down my arm.

And it camouflaged itself in floating water moss.

So it looked like turf. She'd never seen an alligator in the area before.

So apparently, I mean, how's the dog? I don't care about your arm. How's the dog? That's what I all like. I mean, I guess the dog's okay.

Nobody's saying anything about the dog. She's, you know, but she's pretty hardcore. And she was able to whoop it. I think I would have honestly done the same thing. I'm not going to lie.

Actually, I would have shot it in the head with my Taurus. But then, you know, our partners, our friends at Caltech who actually understand trigger discipline. You know, it's a it's a thing. The PR57.

Now everybody's got to start thinking about protection. Guns do save lives and they are used three times more to save lives. And this is not you don't have to take my word for it. You can take Democrat criminal researcher Gary Click down at University of Florida. You can also take Obama's DOJ 2013 and 2016, respectively, two separate studies which confirm this, that they are used more in defense of life than by criminals in illegal possession to do criminal things.

And so we all have to start thinking about our security. One of the best ways to do this, obviously, is get something you're going to shoot and train with it. I would suggest to you, especially if you like 5.7s or if you want something that's, you know, a little bit more, 5.7s, their new PR57, Chamberlain 5.7, this is the lightest 5.7 that's on the market, 40% lighter than the competition. And they achieve this through two different ways. They have the rotary barrel that makes it lighter, but also the very unique way that it's loaded.

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Learn more at keltecweapons.com, K-E-L-T-E-C, weapons.com. Tell them that Dana sent you. I bet you've probably been to the doctor's office in the past few months. I bet you had to hand over personal info, like your insurance, your ID, maybe even your social security number. And I bet you weren't thinking about how your doctor is just one of many places that has your personal information.

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Help protect it even when it's out of your hands. Save up to 40% your first year with promo code I heart. Call 1-800 life lock and use promo code I heart or go to life lock.com slash I heart for 40% off terms apply. I've got Dan Morgan here on the pod. Say hi, Dan.

Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan. I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan & Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm.

That's pretty awesome. I think I saw a billboard of yours recently that said 20 billion won. 20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered. It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year.

And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows.

So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome.

So how does someone get in contact with Morgan & Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open.

Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7-365. Wow. Dan Morgan from Morgan & Morgan, America's large injury law firm. Thanks for coming by the show.

Thanks for having me. Visit forthepeople.com for an office near you. Yesterday, I was in my office after radio and I'm getting some things together for the newsletter and getting some things together for later this week. And I usually have the TV on. I like to have white noise.

I'll either have like music or something on in the background. I can't, I have to have some kind of white noise. and I think I just had like Fox in the background and the next thing I knew I I heard someone I know friend of mine Greg Gutfeld just lose it on camera he had had enough and I want to say this too because this is very important I know a lot of people don't like Jessica Tarlov I've never met in person. We follow each other on social media. I don't agree with about 99% of the stuff that she says.

But I would like to point to a distinction. She is not one of the people on the left who seek to strip you of your humanity. You can be mad at her for being wrong with her beliefs, because she is. But she doesn't seek to strip people of their humanity like the rest of the left does. I'm just adding that in to give you a sharper perspective on things.

And she and Greg are friends. And the reason that he later apologized was just for yelling at her. Because it's it's different when you know the person it's different when you've watched the person literally rise up in life from being a 17 year old and then getting married and having babies and it's just very different when you Feel like you have this investment Of knowing someone for as long as you known them and then you see this happen so that is and it very unique because of what uh the work that kirk did i think that why everybody i mean i don't know anybody who doesn't know him in this industry everybody knows him that's why it's that's why it is different because it it is anyway he was on uh fox yesterday And he got very upset with the whataboutism. Whataboutism-ing. And he was correct.

And I wanted to play this for you because up until this point, I had not seen anybody else. You know, obviously, I don't sit here and watch myself. But strike the note, I think, that not just I, but a lot of other people feel. And I wanted to play this for you. It's a longer cut, but it's worth it.

And I was jokingly, I forgot cable news doesn't have the same restrictions for the FCC because I had offered to give Greg my get out of jail free card that was bestowed on me by the commissioner of the FCC, Brendan Carr. I was like, oh, my gosh, I would like to transfer the properties of this get out of jail free card to Greg Gutfeld right now. Audio soundbite 13. This is how it started. And it's long, but it is worth the listen.

We don't need it. What is interesting here is why is only this happening on the left and not the right? That's all we need to know. There's absolutely no cognitive. What about Melissa Hortman that we just talked about?

You want to talk about Melissa Hortman? Did you know her name before it happened? None of us did. None of us were spending every single day talking about Mrs. Hortman.

I never heard of her until after she died.

So she doesn't matter? Don't play that bullshit with me. You know what I'm what I'm saying is there was no demonization amplification about that woman before she died. It was a specific crime against her by somebody who knew her. The same.

You could bring up Josh Shapiro, but then you will not bring up, for example, that that was a pro-Palestine person.

So don't use your what about this? The fact the fact of the matter is the both sides argument not only doesn't fly. We don't care. We don't care about your both sides argument. That is dead.

For one thing, there is no cognitive dissonance on our side. On your side, your beliefs do not match reality.

So you're coming up with these rationalizations like what about this or what about that? We're not doing that because we saw it happen. We saw a young, bright man assassinated and we know who did it. We are not coming up with rationalizations. We are calm.

We are honest and we are resolute. We're not defensive. And I understand the defensiveness. I understand why people are saying, what about this and what about this? Because if you have to face the underlying fact of this, your life is going to fall apart because you're going to realize you're not the good guys.

If you sat around and you defended the mutilation of children, you're not the good guys. If you sat 600, 700 cases of harassment against Republicans and you said, but what about this? What about this? And then you see this murder after calling somebody a fascist. You fascist, you realize maybe I'm not the good guy.

That is a hell of a realization to deal with.

So therefore, therefore, you have to grasp at rationalizations. You don't have to do that, Jessica. they do i don't believe you're part of that group but why the hell do you have to mimic and echo that crack to us he was a patsy that guy was a patsy he was under the hypnotic spell of a direct to consumer nihilism the trans cult and you know that if you can decide that biology is false you can agree that you that murder is okay and that humanity is expendable how you cannot see that alone and see that for what the evil it is without having to attach all of these other things is beyond me preach preach that is and that is it the point where that with melissa hortman the point that that greg is making here said none of these people on the left knew who the hell she was it's not a statement of whether or not she mattered because of it she wasn't getting the daily threats like everybody on the conservative side gets every single day. She didn't have to turn down events. Democrats don't have to do that.

I mean, good grief. There's an event this weekend. I was asked if I'd speak at it and I'm like, it's going to be outside. You know how many of these rooftops are going to be completely just open, open season? No way.

We got to think about that stuff. We've had to think about that stuff for a very long time. We definitely have to think about it now. That's what he's saying is that there was no rhetoric around the Hortmans before that. And that was a Tim Walz appointee and they found no King stuff in his car.

I don't know. Josh Shapiro, that was a pro Hamas sympathizer who targeted Josh Shapiro because he was Jewish. Maybe he was a Candace fan. I don't know. Oh, I said it.

So what is this? The what about is the that doesn't fly. He's exactly right. And he followed it up with this about the media. This is a lot shorter.

This is audio sound by 14. He followed it up with this. Listen. I just want to be clear. I want to let people speak.

I in no way intended at all to minimize what happened to Charlie. I was horrified by it. I have not been on the five. But the two sides argument, it's like a duck. No, all that I was saying is, is could we have all of the information before you just say they did this?

Because that is a broad brush to paint with this. And this kid does have a conversation. No, we had a conversation. I got shot. Look, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. You weren't here for a week. You came in here and it's cold and I'm sorry. But this is a story that is immune to news cycles.

It's immune to rationalizations. It's immune device. This thing is with us for good. And we all have to deal with that.

So that means we can't live by the same arguments that you might be reading about relativism among the media. We can't deal with those stories. It doesn't matter. The media is dead to us on the story. They built this thing up.

We're dealing with it. We're going to act. We don't care what the whataboutism is anymore. That s*** is dead.

Sorry. For the swearing as well, I apologize to the American public. Like, I'm going to shut up for the rest of the show. Long live Greg Gutfeld. God bless him.

He is so right in that. And he's right. And I think that his analysis of what Tarloff was saying was accurate. And the point that he made, and I think this is the big one, why do they do it? Why did they what about us and why did my pastor try to bring up the hortmans As though that was somehow oh, well, look see it's here too.

It's not it's not even remotely the same Because if you have to Look at really why as greg said your life will fall apart And he's right if you can Fabricate this fantastical story That even though you were born with a male copulatory organ And you're a dude that you're a woman And if you don't affirm That fantasy For that person then somehow It is justifiable To perpetrate violence against you Because when you get When you drop all of the illogical Equifications That's what you're looking at And a lot of people On the left are having to do a real deep personal inventory. Yes, you are the baddies here. And you have a culture of this, this assassination culture, this culture of dehumanization and demonization. It is a culture. But Dana, some people on the right, people on the right, we don't sit here and call people Nazis unless they're actual jackbooted Nazis.

You walking mental abortions. We do not use that language Because we know what those words mean We have dictionaries We not dumbasses That why I had some people saying I had some very sweet people a couple of them very sweet And they were like, you are very upset over this. You're damn right I am. You are right. You know why we're all upset over this?

Because haven't conservatives lost enough? I mean, this, it's about Charlie, and it's also about a lot more. How many friends did you lose over COVID? Do you know I have one part of my family that has nothing to do with me? Or my kids because they're my kids.

One part of my family. And oh, they're all happy to act like they know me to the townsfolk and the Ozarks, but otherwise they don't have anything to do with me because they're socialists and I'm not. How many of you have been disinvited from Christmases because of that? with your kids? How many of you have had people who were in your wedding party call you a murderer because you didn't get an injection?

Because I've had to live with that. I have other friends who lost dear friends of theirs over politics. They didn't want to have anything to do with them. These people were always fine when we sat there silent and we were not allowed the equal access of sharing our viewpoints as freely as they do because we were all about keeping the peace, keeping the peace, keeping the peace. We don't want to rock the boat.

Keep the peace, keep the beast, keep your mouth shut every damn day, every damn event, every damn occasion, every damn holiday. We were the ones who kept the peace. No more. This is on you people. If you want unity by God, then be worthy of it.

So yes, when people say, you seem very mad about this, yes, because we have already had a hundred little deaths. Friends, family, opportunities. I mean, hell, my agent, who's a very sweet person, God love him, he didn't do this. But he had pressure to drop me after Parkland. People in the industry Did not want to have anything to do with me Because of Parkland He got pressure to drop me It's already been a hundred little deaths For a lot of us Having something so massive like this happen The way it did was the last straw So the what about does it mean?

No, that does not fly The media trying to equivocate it No, that does not fly And the sweet people who reached out Yes, we're angry I'm angry especially because it's different. It is different. It's changed things. And now maybe people get a little bit of insight into why that is.

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So that's bowlandbranch.com slash Dana Show for 15% off. exclusions apply. I bet you've probably been to the doctor's office in the past few months. I bet you had to hand over personal info like your insurance, your ID, maybe even your social security number. And I bet you weren't thinking about how your doctor is just one of many places that has your personal information.

If any one of them isn't careful, it's a good bet they could accidentally expose your details to hackers and identity theft, putting you at risk. Fortunately, LifeLock monitors hundreds of millions of data points a second for threats to your identity. If your identity is stolen, a LifeLock U.S.-based restoration specialist will fix it, guaranteed or your money back, with plans covering up to $3 million for stolen funds and expenses. Don't take chances with your personal info. Help protect it even when it's out of your hands.

Save up to 40% your first year with promo code IHEART. Call 1-800-LIFELOCK and use promo code IHEART or go to lifelock.com slash IHEART for 40% off. Terms apply. I've got Dan Morgan here. on the pod.

Say hi, Dan. Hey, how's it going today? It's going good, man. Tell us who you are and what you do. I'm Dan Morgan.

I'm an attorney and a managing partner at Morgan & Morgan, which is America's largest injury law firm. That's pretty awesome. I think I saw a billboard of yours recently that said 20 billion won. 20 billion is an insane number. Yeah, 20 billion recovered.

It's actually, I think, somewhere north, probably closer to 22, 23 after this year. And each year we get bigger and badder and our army grows.

So the number will hopefully keep getting bigger and bigger as time goes on. Awesome.

So how does someone get in contact with Morgan & Morgan? What would I do if I got into an accident? Probably the easiest way is dialing pound law. That's pound 529 from your cell phone. We are always open.

Our call center is always waiting to take your call. 24-7-365. Wow. Dan Morgan from Morgan & Morgan, America's large injury law firm. Thanks for coming by the show.

Thanks for having me. Visit forthepeople.com for an office near you. And now, all of the news you would probably miss. It's time for Dana's Quick Five. Gosh, this one just is gutting.

And yeah, it fulfills, well, Robert Redford also fulfills the law of three for my grandmother. Ricky Hatton has passed away. Ricky Hatton is absolutely one of my favorite boxers. I watched him, gosh, go up against Mayweather. I mean, for a long time.

And I love the songs that his fans have. 46 years old. on Sunday he was found deceased in his home. And they said that they, it was like 6.45 in the morning in Manchester. And they said it didn't seem suspicious.

He had, you know, looks like he had a health issue. But they said that, you know, they're mourning him. Obviously our prayers are with his family. He was like a, he was a fun boxer. He was a little powerhouse.

And then in addition to the great Ricky Hatton, uh also apparently robert redford has passed away as well uh he's been in a million different movies the new york times announced it today age 89 uh has passed away and uh that's uh goodness so this has been all of a sudden this is this is you know the the hat thing was you know because i followed his career for quite a while two arrested after an incendiary device was found under a news media vehicle in Utah. This was interesting. Authorities say two men were arrested yesterday on suspicion of placing this incendiary device. It was under a CBS affiliate, KUTV. And they said that, and I hate autoplay videos from these websites.

I feel like your website should be just, yeah, you know, well, still they autoplay. And I'm like, I want to bomb your website. But they had, speaking of bombs, they've put this device under this news media vehicle and they did arrest these two individuals. California lawmakers are passed. They passed a bill that would make it that would ban masks for ICE agents.

You know, the ICE agents that cartels have put hits out on, you know, the ICE agents that people are doxing and encouraging people to go and harass their families. It has not it's heading to Newsom. He's not said whether or not he would veto it or sign it. He hasn't said it. But their legislature is the first state in the union.

That's it to pass this proposal. It's been introduced in other states. There's even a bill similar to this in committee in Congress. But so far, Newsom, they don't know what his support is, but it's going to his desk. He's going to sign it.

How is he not going to sign? Of course he's going to sign it. Apparently, if you have great calves, you have a healthy brain.

So I have amazing calves.

So my brain is super healthy. This is according to a new study that came out. It reported by the Telegraph Stay with us We got a lot more on the way This is one of the things that was sent out I put this I saw this this morning This was one of the things that was uh sent out i put this uh i saw this this morning this was one of the things that was shared this was a flyer for uh the trans tifa perpetuators that were behind the july 4th alvarado ice facility shooting apparently are involved in this and the one of the the people that the one of the people that's being advertised in some of this stuff. I mean, this is, it's just, it's crazy. Elm Fork, by the way, you know where that's at, right?

It's in Texas. I've shot at Elm Fork before. I've gone Elm Fork. SLC Arm Queers is in Utah. And then you've got this, the flyer here as well that we were just showing you.

Can we throw that back up real quick, Juan?

Sorry. This flyer, let me pull this up. This is, Libs of TikTok found this. Can we just talk about this for a minute? What the hell does this mean.

First off, you have the communist sickle. Then you have this moron who has no idea how to hold a gun. Finger on the trigger. Are you serious right now? Armed Queers SLC.

That's the group that is working with one of the entities that shot up an ICE facility. Agitate, educate, organize. You don't see law-abiding gun owners say stuff like that, by the way. No, I've never gone out there. For all the stuff that the media has said about me, I've never gone out and said with a poster that says agitate, holding a rifle with my finger on the trigger.

They're so stupid.

So stupid. People that have more zeal than knowledge. And I mean, you can't make fun of it anymore because they're killing people. The hammer and sickle. What other emblems can you fit on there, by the way?

What other ones can you fit on there? What kind of lecture are they going to give?

so this is in salt lake city this is just one of the one of the examples the armed queers slc the same one that's on this flyer they are they're the ones hosting these workshops at elm fork with uh a branch of the john brown gun club and the trans anti trans antifa that's like antif trans tifa wow that's a lot uh they were behind that july 4th alvarado ice facility thing and one of the people that's involved appears to have promoted all of this stuff on their private her private instagram and they tried they tried scrubbing it google never forgets so uh i've you know got i got some questions and one of the things that they're promoting promoting is that the trans struggle it's uh you know the the need for oneself they really They're looking at it like it's like conflict.

So all the people who are telling Trump and everyone else to tone down their rhetoric, why don't you look at your trans street team here? You need to be telling these people this. You won't do it because you're cowards. And you would rather see conservatives be killed, apparently, than to tell your street team to knock it off. If you want to talk about toning down rhetoric, I just gave you an example.

That's the rhetoric that needs to be toned down. The trans people made it up This trans Tifa movement made it up in their head That they're under attack if people don't affirm their cosplay That is the most mentally ill thing I've ever heard That's mental illness That is serious mental illness To insist that you are under attack Because someone won't affirm your cosplay That's like me getting murdery Because someone won't affirm my fantasy that I'm a trillionaire Are you kidding me This is all a war that they're making up in their own heads And then the left that hates the right so much That they justify violence as a form of debate They're like oh yeah you're right You're under attack So crazy I just feel like Democrats are encouraging this stuff And they're nudging these people Everybody's a Hitler Don't forget that's what it feels like am i wrong i don't feel like i'm wrong kane i don't feel like i'm wrong what do you see when you look at that flyer with your blue your blu-ray what is it blue light blocking glasses it is it's blue light blocking um when i see that first of all no discipline on her part personal or trigger um and i don't see how this can be interpreted in any other way than a avatar of the entire left like what the hell are you resisting as a trans person right That's all they have. They're not for anything. It's always against. I want the taxpayers to pay to have my wiener split in half and turned into a frankangina.

Well, that's what it is. Cringy. Cringy. Well, that's the truth of it. I mean, that's where we're at.

But what are they resisting? But that's the thing. They're always against something. They're never for. They think that they're proclaiming they're for something when they're doing this against something stuff, but they're not.

Correct. completely like that. Yeah, I just, I don't, I don't understand what it is that they, this whole like, oh, it's, it's queer resistance. It's, first off, all the other letters don't want to be with you, T's. They don't.

And secondly, what are you resisting? You're the one who's trying to force everyone to affirm your cosplay. We're actually resisting. You're the baddies here. Then you got this kind of stuff.

By the way, what goofy pose is this? Who styled this photo? First off, I got immediately. This is another one. I'm going to stick my foot out.

Are they trying to like play up the jackboot aspect of what they want to? Is that what this is? Because this is such an unflattering photo. The lighting is so harsh. It's just so bad.

But they're like, here's our gun. Again, people have no idea how to hold anything. More zeal than knowledge. We're armed and ready to bash back because people won't call sir they won't call you a woman this is the most you want this is the abusive patriarchy and the left is just bending over and spreading cheeks that's exactly what they're doing this is the most this is the patriarchy at its most abusive form and it's always progressive because it's always been progressive this is a major issue now i just had a column that dropped in the Washington Times, you know, literally the day that God help us all that that Charlie was killed, talking about how I don't believe that transgender people as a whole should have their have guns banned. I think that that's, you know, that's a Pandora's box and individual liberties and the revocation or the adjudication of someone as ineligible has always been done on an individual basis, not this group basis.

But y'all aren't helping it. you're not helping this at all i've yet to see like the closest person to a trans person that i saw like just very genuinely authentically against the violence was jeffree star that was literally and i said the closest thing to like that that i can think of that's it i've not seen it anywhere else i'm not exaggerating i've been really actively looking not seen it anywhere else. The question is why? Thanks for tuning in to today's edition of Dana Lash's Absurd Truth Podcast. If you haven't already, make sure to hit that subscribe button on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

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