Being Around People-While Still Being Sane! - Part B

Based on first-hand experience only, who's the worst person you know?

You. You are the worst person in the world that you know of. And I am the worst person in the world that I know.

I'm the worst. And so when I approach people cognizant of my own baggage, my own sin, I'll approach them differently. And that is exactly what Paul did.

In the New Testament he writes things like this, I am the least of all the apostles and I am not even worthy to be called an apostle. We're all flawed people, and that means our relationships won't ever be perfect. But if you live by God's Word, you can build bonds that are rooted in love, redemption, and forgiveness. Today on Connect with Skip Heitzel, Skip explores some biblical truths that can help you maintain healthy relationships. Now we want to tell you about a resource that will help you grow stronger in your faith.

Reading the Bible can lead to asking some serious questions like, Is the rapture real or how can I overcome anxiety? These two questions are among those answered in Pastor Skip's Picks, a new DVD of four impactful messages by Skip Heitzig. Imagine knowing somebody who knows everything about you.

Now imagine somebody who knows everything about you and loves you anyway. That's what we're dealing with when we deal with the knowledge of God. This collection of some of Pastor Skip's most memorable teachings also includes What Most People Don't Know About Heaven and it's our thanks for your gift of $25 or more to connect more people to God's life-changing Word.

Visit connectwithskip.com slash offer to give online securely or call 800-922-1888 and request your copy of Pastor Skip's Picks. Okay, we're in Philippians chapter 2 as Skip Heitzig starts today's study. Jesus was humble. Jesus was lowly minded.

I want you to see it. If you go to verse 5 and I'm taking a little thunder away from next week, that's where we'll be, but look at it. Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus, who being in the form of God did not consider it robbery to be equal with God, but he made himself of no reputation, taking the form of a bondservant and coming in the likeness of men and being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to the point of death, even the death on the cross.

So let me sum this little point up by saying this. Humility is the grace that becomes the grease so that the gears of relationship can turn smoothly. Humility is the grace that becomes the grease so that the gears of relationships can turn smoothly. Do be humble. Second on the do list, do be respectful. You'll notice that Paul says, Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind, let each esteem others better than himself. Now he qualifies that in the next verse. Let each of you look out, be on the lookout, not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. I like the way the message translation renders this. Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand.

Here's how it works. Let's say we're together. If when we're together, I always put myself first and you always put yourself first, we're going to collide. We're going to have problems. But if when we're together, I put you first and you put me first, we're going to get along just fine. We're going to be preferring one another. We're going to be esteeming one another.

Our relationship is going to flourish. I heard about a youth pastor who went to a special Olympics for children, and these handicapped kids will compete in different events. Well, it was the 220-yard dash. And the race began, and a boy named Andrew took the lead.

He was 50 yards out in front of everybody else in the pack and kept gaining more and more as he went. Until he turned the final round for that last little leg of his lap. As he was making the final turn, little Andrew ahead of everybody else looked down on the track and noticed his good friend had fallen in the race and was hurt on the ground. At that point, Andrew stopped. And he looked at the finish line.

And he looked down at his friend. And everybody in the crowd said, run, Andrew, run! But Andrew didn't run. Andrew walked over to his friend, hurt on the ground while people passed him by, lifted up his friend, more people passed him by, and took his hand, took his arm, and walked with his friend and came in dead last. Now everybody in the stands, they understood what was going on, and they applauded for him, but he came in last, walking his friend just so he could finish at all. What Andrew discovered is what a lot of us so often forget, and that is that sometimes finishing first isn't the most important thing.

Helping somebody finish at all is. I bet you've heard the name Leonard Bernstein. You've heard of him because he was really the first American conductor and musician that achieved worldwide acclaim on his level. He was a conductor. He was a director of an orchestra back. He was a conductor of the New York Philharmonic Orchestra. He wrote the musical score for many Broadway plays.

If I mentioned them all, you'd be familiar with them. Leonard Bernstein was once asked one day, what is the hardest instrument to play? To which he said, the second fiddle.

The second fiddle, and he explained, he said, I can get plenty of first violinists, but to find somebody who can play the second fiddle with enthusiasm, that is a problem. That is a problem. So let us, let each esteem others. Let's look out for others' interests. Now, as I say these words, and as I studied this, I thought of something.

I thought, this is a good point, and this preaches well, but it doesn't practice easy. I mean, you and I are going to go out in a few minutes, go out and get busy with our lives and do other stuff, and chances are we're all going to forget this, even if we take a few notes, because esteeming other people greater than ourselves is so against our human nature. How are we even going to pull that off? I mean, who does that? Who lives that way? Where we esteem others better. We're always looking out for other people.

I mean, it's good. It's what we're commanded to do, but how do we do that? It's awfully difficult to do. It's extremely difficult.

How do we do it? Let me give you a little help, a little hint of what might be helpful. The one person in all the world that you know better than any other person is whom? Who do you know better?

Yourself. You know you better. You know how you think.

You know what you're tempted by. You know what you like and what you hate. You know what you really feel like, even though you might look good on the outside.

You know who you are on the inside. So I'm looking at you all. You're all beautiful. You look good.

You have Bibles. Your hair's done nicely. Most of you.

Just kidding. You all look good, but I don't really know you. Now, I know me. I know me, and I know what I'm made of, and I know my failures, and I know my temptations, and I know my own crud and my own junk. So if I approach people while I'm cognizant of my own shortcomings, failures, and sin, I'm going to approach people differently. I'm going to approach people humbly, because here's why. Based on firsthand experience only, who's the worst person you know? You. You are the worst person in the world that you know of, and I am the worst person in the world that I know of.

I'm the worst. And so when I approach people cognizant of my own baggage, my own sin, I'll approach them differently. And that is exactly what Paul did. In the New Testament, he writes things like this. I am the least of all the apostles, and I am not even worthy to be called an apostle. Now, I think, Paul, you're like the greatest dude ever. You're like the greatest Christian I know of. He goes, I'm the least of the apostles, not even worthy to be called an apostle. And then he writes in another place, I am the least of all the saints, because I persecuted the church of God.

He's approaching them, carrying what he knows about himself, and as he does, that deflated him. That's how you can help esteem others better than yourself. So don't be selfish, don't be prideful, do be humble, do be respectful. Those are the basics of great relationships.

Those are the dos and don'ts. Now, let's look at the first two verses and consider the basis of it. It's the why for all the what that we just covered. And here's the first reason.

The reason that we should be humble and not prideful, the reason we should esteem others better is, here's the reason. Number one, because the world won't provide that. What's the first word in verse one of chapter two? What's the first word? Shout it out.

What is it? Therefore. Now, who begins a chapter with that word? I mean, the first conversation you had this morning with your spouse or your child or parent or whatever, the first thing, did you say, therefore?

You don't begin the day that way. Therefore connects a previous statement and brings it into the present tense. You say, therefore, when you're talking about something and you want to use that as a reference for why you should do something now. So he begins with the therefore and we need to find out what it's there for. So we go back to verse 27 where we were last time.

Chapter one, verse 27. Only let your conduct be worthy of the gospel of Christ so that whether I come and see you or am absent, I may hear of your affairs, that you stand fast in one spirit with one mind striving together for the faith of the gospel and not in any way terrified by your enemies, your adversaries, which is to them a proof of perdition but to you of salvation in that from God. For to you it has been granted on behalf of Christ not only to believe in him, but also to suffer for his sake, having the same conflict which you saw in me and now hear is in me.

Therefore. In other words, here's what Paul is saying. You and Philippi are already suffering because of all of the selfishness of the unbelieving world around you who hate the gospel message. And they are attacking you and they are persecuting you and you are experiencing that conflict. So the people of this world are consumed with their own agendas, their own desires. Paul is saying don't add to that.

Don't add to that. Since the world is persecuting the church, the church shouldn't persecute the church. You see, Jesus said this. In this world you will have tribulation, but be of good cheer.

I have overcome the world. This is the reason it is so awkward when Christians fight each other because we're copying the world. It's the world that persecutes us.

Let's not add to that. Paul's whole point in the therefore is since selfishness is all around you, it certainly shouldn't be among you. Therefore. So reason number one, the basis of these great relationships is because the world will not provide it and the church should. Number two, because you belong to Christ. You should be humble with other people who are a Christian. And so he says if therefore there is any consolation in Christ. Now you see the little word if.

It could be better translated since. Because the idea is if and it's true or since it is true, since you are consoled by belonging to Christ, right, you belong to Christ. Philippians 1-1 says the Philippians are in Christ Jesus. You're in Christ Jesus. He loves you. He forgave you. He washed your sins away. He promised you heaven.

One translation puts it this way. If you've gotten anything at all out of following Christ, then you ought to be humble. Then you ought to esteem others better than yourself.

So here's the deal. I can get along with you even though you're imperfect. You can get along with me even though I know I am so imperfect. You know why? Because Jesus can get along with all of us and we're all imperfect.

That's the idea of this thought. So because the world won't provide it because you belong to Christ. There's a third reason. Because his love is the catalyst. Because his love is the catalyst.

Please notice it. If there's any consolation in Christ, if there is any comfort of love, whose love? Well, he spoke about Christ a few words back. So this is Christ's love for us. In other words, if Jesus loving you has made any difference at all in your life, then it'll show up in your humility. Which, by the way, brings up a good question. What difference has Jesus loving you made in your life?

It's a good question to think about. What difference has all the love that Jesus has given your way, what difference has it made in your life? Has it made you more loving? John 3, 16, For God so loved the world that he gave, has his love for you made you more giving, more loving? So that's the basis of our relationship.

I can accept you because Jesus has accepted us. I heard about a lady. She works in a nursing home. And she has made it her mission to sit with people who are dying if there is no family member present. She feels that life is sacred, a gift from God, and she believes that nobody should die alone. And she wants to demonstrate that love for the dying so that they leave the world in the presence of somebody who cares and loves them.

That's powerful. So if Jesus is in me, then his love will come through me. And there's a fourth and a final reason because we're a spiritual family. In verse 1 again, If there's any consolation in Christ, if there's any comfort of love, here it is.

If there's any fellowship of the Spirit, and then he amplifies that, if any affection and mercy. Now in Philippi I mentioned that things were not perfect. They weren't. There were problems that they were experiencing. There were two dividing forces in Philippi that are true of every single church. First of all, there were false teachers on the outside. Second, there were fighting members on the inside. The false teachers will be discussed in chapter 3 verses 1 and 2. Paul calls them dogs and evil workers. It's going to be a lot of fun when we get to chapter 3.

Paul's just going to kind of come unglued. Then we get to chapter 4 and we discover the fighting members. There's two gals.

One named Yodia, the other named Syntyche. These two gals in the church at Philippi have gotten a lot of people on their side and they're creating a division, a party spirit. So the fellowship is being hurt. It's always being hurt when that happens.

Now here's the deal. There's always pressure from the outside for the church. Always. Every church, every place in the world, every generation. For the last 2,000 years, the world has always been against the church. Unbelievers will always mock Christians' belief. Unbelievers will always challenge our faith. But if that is compounded when our own spiritual family is dysfunctional, it makes matters much worse.

So here's Paul's point. We are a fellowship of the Spirit. We're in Christ, so we're related by blood. His blood has washed all of us. We're a fellowship in the Spirit, so the same Holy Spirit that lives in me is the same Holy Spirit that lives in you.

As Paul said in 1 Corinthians 12, by one Spirit we are all baptized into one body. You know, we have all heard of reports of families who quarrel amongst themselves until somebody from the outside attacks the family. Then they all somehow galvanize together because don't you say that about my mom or my brother. And they'll resolve the conflict to fight the greater conflict. I just want you to know that everybody needs a family.

Everybody needs a group where they can be loved and accepted and taught and held accountable. So, to sum it all up, be humble. Be helpful.

Be noble. For the sake of the church of Jesus Christ which he purchased with his own blood. He did it. It's his. It's not ours.

It's his. Now, if that were to happen in Philippi, that would just push Paul's joy over the top. Look what he says in verse 2. Fulfill my joy by being like-minded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind.

That's interesting. Paul already said he was joyful no matter what. Paul already said you can lock me in prison, I'm joyful. You can beat me up, I'm joyful because my joy is in the Lord.

You can have people talk smack about me and try to slur my reputation around town. I'm joyful anyway. But now he says, but here's a way I could actually be more joyful. Fulfill my joy or complete my joy. So Paul is saying, man, if you guys were humble with each other and you esteemed others better than you esteem yourself, that would be the icing on the cake for me. That would be the cherry in the Coke.

That would be the whipped cream on the apple pie. That would fulfill, that would complete my joy. By the way, if we were to live that way, you know who else would be really, really, really, really joyful? You would be. We all would be.

All of us would be. You've heard me say it before, that the more you do as you please, the less you are pleased with what you do. Think about that statement. The more you live as you please, the less you will be pleased with what you do. If you live for self, if it's all about you and your agenda and your comfort and you being happy, you getting your way, you will become a miserable person.

I'm going to close with an illustration of that, and I will close. It's by Bernard Rimland. Bernie was the director of the Institute for Child Behavior Research. He conducted a study, and at the end of the study, he concluded the happiest people in the world are the humblest people in the world. So he did a study.

I'll read it to you. Each person in the study involved was asked to list 10 people that he knew best and label them happy or unhappy. So you think of 10 people you know and label which one? Happy, unhappy, unhappy, unhappy.

Happy, happy. You do that with 10 people. Then you go through the list again and label each one as selfish or unselfish using the following definition of selfishness. Here's his definition, and I'm quoting. A stable tendency to devote one's time and resources to one's own interests and welfare and unwillingness to inconvenience oneself or others. Close quote.

In categorizing the results, Rimland found that all of the people labeled happy were also labeled unselfish. And he wrote, and I'm quoting, those whose activities are devoted to bringing themselves happiness are far less likely to be happy than those whose efforts are devoted to making others happy. And then he concluded with a remark that I thought you would find interesting. He said, do unto others as you would have others do unto you. Now who said those words? Jesus said those words in the Sermon on the Mount. He had to go through a whole study to figure that out.

And he found it out, and he said, do unto others as you would have others do unto you. So listen, the quickest road to joy is Humility Boulevard. The quickest road to unhappiness is the freeway of self. And if you get on that freeway of self, you know what you're going to discover? It's packed, it's bumper to bumper.

There's people who are nasty, they'll give you gestures, they'll cuss you out, and there's a lot of people on it. You get on Humble Boulevard, it's pretty lonely out there. It's the quickest road to joy. That wraps up Skip Heitzig's message from the series Technicolor Joy. Right now, reading the stories of the Bible is a very good thing. Walking where these stories took place is at a whole other level. Skip Heitzig is planning his next tour, and you can be on it.

Here's the invitation from Skip. You're in for an incredible time as we travel throughout Israel and experience the culture that's so unique to that country. Now, I've been to Israel a number of times over the years, and I can honestly say that visiting the places where the events of the Scriptures unfolded, where Jesus lived, taught, and healed, it just never gets old. We'll start on the Mediterranean Sea and head north, seeing places like Caesarea and Nazareth, the Sea of Galilee, and the Jordan River. We'll spend several days in and around Jerusalem and see the Temple Mount, Calvary, the Garden of Gethsemane, and the Mount of Olives, and much more. This remarkable itinerary is made richer with times of worship, Bible study, and lots of fellowship.

The Bible will come alive to you in a way it never has before. I hope you'll join Lenny and me on what is always an unforgettable trip. I can't wait to see you in Israel. This dream can come true for you. Start planning and saving now to tour Israel with Skip Heitzig. Information at inspirationcruises.com slash C-A-B-Q.

That's inspirationcruises.com slash C-A-B-Q. Tune in again tomorrow as Skip Heitzig looks to the example of Christ for ways you can show people God's love through humility. Make a connection, make a connection at the foot of the cross and cast all burdens on His Word. Make a connection, connection. Connect with Skip Heitzig is a presentation of Connection Communications, connecting you to God's never-changing truth in ever-changing times.