Hope for Prodigal Children | Lead Yourself Before Your Child

A New Beginning presents a great book from Pastor Greg Laurie called Hope for America. Yes, we're in a political season right now. We need to vote. We should be informed on the issues as Americans and as Christians, but we should also recognize the ultimate hope for our nation is turning back to God. So I talk about this and a lot more in a book I've written called Hope for America. And I want to send it to you for your gift of any size.

Get your copy at harvest.org. Pastor Greg Laurie points out, of all the things we as parents are to teach our kids, a love for the Lord is absolutely paramount. Sure, we want to teach them good manners, but the most important thing we do with our kids is we point them to Jesus Christ.

But listen to this. We cannot lead a child any further than we ourselves have come. Nothing can happen through us until it has happened to us.

So we ourselves need to be walking with the Lord. It's been pointed out that the values we pass on to our children aren't so much taught as they are caught. Robert Fulgham, author of All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten, said, Don't worry that children never listen to you.

Worry that they're always watching you. Today on A New Beginning, Pastor Greg Laurie provides some biblical insight for parents, especially parents of children who have wandered away from the Lord. Get a replay of this study at harvest.org. Ok. So here is a question. Have you ever lost anything? You know I think of things I have lost in life. When I was a very little boy I had a little parakeet. And I named him Popcorn. And he was a fantastic little bird. I would stand a few feet away from his cage and open the little door and call his name and he would fly and land on my shoulder.

I would walk around the house with him on my shoulder. I loved that little bird. Well one day I was down in Balboa Island in Newport Beach and I saw this guy walking around with a parrot on his shoulder. And I was amazed by the fact that this parrot didn't fly away.

So my little brain processed and thought, I can do that with my parakeet too. So I went home. Got Popcorn. Put him on my shoulder. And by the way he never flew away in my house. I walked outside. Popcorn looked around.

Flew off. Never saw him again. So I was walking down the street literally for the next few days crying out, Popcorn. Popcorn. People probably saw me through the window thinking poor kid is hungry. Give him some food you know.

Never saw Popcorn again. Ok. Fast forward now a number of years and I am married and Christopher has been born. He is just a little boy. And we have a dog. We just got a puppy. And we had gone to my grandmother's house the day before and she made this amazing biscuit that was just the best you have ever had in your life.

Anyway. So we had biscuits on the brain still. And I said to Christopher, what do you want to name the new puppy? And he said, Biscuit.

Ok. So the dog was named Biscuit. Who was a dog named Biscuit?

We did. Well Biscuit got away and was loose in the neighborhood somewhere. Maybe this is telling something about my pets don't love me at all. But so I am walking down the street yelling out, Biscuit. Biscuit. People are probably looking out the window saying, does that man need some food? Didn't we see him a number of years ago as a small boy yelling for popcorn? Obviously he is hungry. Well fortunately I found Biscuit.

It is one thing to lose a parakeet or a puppy but it is another thing to lose a child. Fast forward even a number of years and we were doing one of our crusades and I was in a hotel with Jonathan who was probably around maybe five years old at this point. And we were going to the elevator in the hotel we were staying at. And he loved to push the buttons.

And so he was running ahead. I said, now wait until dad gets there. Don't get in the elevator before dad gets there.

He tears around the corner and I am trying to catch up with him. And just as I came around the corner I saw the elevator doors closing with Jonathan standing there. It is just like you almost have a heart attack on the spot. And so I pushed every button and I am waiting and I am pushing the button. Have you ever noticed in an elevator when it doesn't come you keep pushing the button? Do you think that helps? No.

It does. Anyway. So I am pushing the button over and over. Finally the door opens.

No Jonathan. So I get in the elevator. I go down to the lobby. I run up there and I ask the person who is on the phone, excuse me ma'am.

My son got off the elevator. Can you call security? Can you call the police? Can you call SWAT? Can you call Delta Force?

Just get someone in here right now. And she wouldn't even get off the phone. Ma'am excuse me.

Ma'am. And finally I thought, ok. I have got to find him myself. So I went back to the elevator. I pushed every button for every floor. And that door opened up and I yelled his name.

And guess what. I would have torn that hotel apart if I had to to find him. Losing him was not an option. Well I did find him.

I don't know what floor it was. He was just standing there. So anyway. But here is the thing. It is one thing to lose a pet. But we never want to lose our children.

Right. As Christian parents our greatest joy is in seeing our kids walk with the Lord. As the apostle John said, I have no greater joy than to know that my children walk in truth.

So we as believers will raise our kids in the way of the Lord and do everything that we can. But sometimes they go astray. You know when they are young they are receptive.

They are open. They are compliant. And for the most part they are obedient. In fact for a time they even feel as though you hung the moon and whatever mom or dad says is obviously true. But as they get older, especially when they enter into their teenage years, they start to push back. And they start to think for themselves and sometimes they start to question the faith you have raised them with. Mark Twain made this statement and I quote, "'When I was a boy of 14 my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around.

But when I got to be 21 I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years.'" And this is the way the teenage brain works. You know they think they are older than they really are. They think they know more than they really know. And they look at you the parent and they question many of the things you have said to that.

Now if this is happening to you right now I want to say don't panic. But let me also offer some words of counsel for those of you that are raising your children. I cannot emphasize enough how important it is to have a godly home. And what a significant role you play in your children's life to raise them in the way of the Lord. Children are a gift from God.

And it is a precious privilege to have them. Psalm 127 says, "'Children are a heritage from the Lord. Children are a reward from Him. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are sons born in one's youth. Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them.'"

And that word that is used there for heritage could better be translated gift. Children are a gift. We don't own them.

They belong to God. They are not ours to mold but to unfold, to nurture, and to raise in the way of the Lord. Well in this series that we are calling Hope for Hurting Hearts we have talked about a lot of things including marriage.

And we said to you, if you have a troubled marriage you need to look to God and to the Scripture to get it right. Well the same is true of raising our children. Because we live in a culture that is hostile to the family. A culture that influences our children for the most part in the wrong way. At best it ignores the values we have raised them with. And at worst it seeks to undermine those values.

And that seems to be the case more often. And so we want to make sure that we are doing our part to counteract that and build a good foundation for our kids. Because I will tell you what. When you come to the end of your life and you look back on what you have accomplished and what you have not accomplished the things you will think the most about are faith and family.

I guarantee it. You won't care about how much money you had or how successful you were in business or how many deals you closed or how many things you accomplished or how many games of golf you played or anything like that. You will be thinking about the way you lived. One Christian father who was looking back in his life wrote these words and I quote, "'My family is all grown now. My kids are gone. But if I had it to do over again this is what I would do. I would love my wife more in front of my children. I would love them with my children more at our mistakes and at our joys.

I would listen more even to the littlest child. I would be more honest about my own weaknesses never pretending perfection. I would pray differently for my family. Instead of focusing on them I would focus more on me. I would do more things together with my children. I would encourage them more and bestow more praise. I would pay more attention to little things like deeds and words of thoughtfulness. And finally if I had it to do over again I would share God more intimately with my family. Every ordinary thing that happened in every ordinary day I would use to direct them to God.'"

Well said. Pastor Greg Laurie will have the second half of his message in just a moment. We're encouraged when we hear from families who have been impacted by the Harvest Crusades and Harvest Ministries. In July I traveled from San Francisco to hear Pastor Greg's message at Harvest 2024 in Anaheim, California. It was there that I rededicated my life to the Lord. The following week I heard that Harvest was doing baptisms at Pirate's Cove in Southern California and so I surprised my nine year old daughter who had wanted to be baptized by driving back down so she could be baptized there.

I have never heard a louder, I love you dad. All I can say is that it has been one of the most memorable events in my life as a dad. A huge thank you to all at Harvest Ministries. What a great story of this father and daughter.

If you have a story to share would you contact us and let us know? Email Pastor Greg. Send it to Greg at Harvest.org. That's Greg at Harvest.org. Well Pastor Greg is passing along some great biblical insight today on the challenging job of parenting.

Let's continue. So how would we provoke our children to wrath? One way is by showing favoritism. This often happens in family. A parent will favor one child over another.

And those kids figure that out really quickly by the way. And this can really develop a resentment and a rivalry among the children. And this happened in the Bible as well. We remember the story of Isaac and Rebecca. And they had two sons Jacob and Esau. Clearly Isaac favored Esau and Rebecca favored Jacob.

And this resulted in a rivalry between those brothers that lasted for a lifetime. So try to be even handed. My wife tells me you know when I get a gift for one of the grandchildren I have to get one for all of the grandchildren. So you know I am going to get. Oh wait. That is times four now. Ok.

So I sometimes I don't get all those things I was going to get you know. But everything has to be even handed you know. And that is a good principle to live by.

Number two. Don't provoke your children to wrath. You can do that also by never affirming or complimenting them. Never affirming or complimenting them.

Listen. A child needs approval and encouragement in the things that are good as much as they need correction in the things that are bad. And we are quick to tell them when they are wrong. We are quick to correct them. To tell them when they are falling short. But do you affirm them? Well done.

That was great. Now interestingly in our culture today some people have swung too far the other way and they over praise their children. It has been described by some experts as helicopter parenting.

And the idea is that parent is always hovering over the child. Over praising them. An article from the South Florida Sun Sentinel had the headline, When Praising Children Goes Too Far. And the article said among other things quote, Parents choose to worry about spoiling their kids and so they criticize lavishly and withheld praise but now they worry about self-esteem so they withhold criticism and they praise lavishly. You can over correct and never affirm and then you can over affirm. You know giving them credit for something they really shouldn't get credit for. Way to finish your meal.

You are the best. No. They just finish their meal. It is ok. And this is shown in competitive sports among children today. Among very small kids. A lot of times they don't keep score anymore. I went to one of the soccer games of my grandchildren and I asked dad there, hey what is a score? And he said, oh we don't keep score. Well excuse me. You know I didn't say that. I just thought it.

I am not that belligerent. But another father told me the score is actually this. So one guy was actually keeping score. In some classrooms they don't give grades out either. Well we don't want to make one child feel like he or she is less than the other children.

So this is swinging too far. Either way you know I look at some of these parents that bring their kids for the addition of American Idol. And after the kid who has no singing abilities whatsoever is rejected the parents say, you are the best. It is like mom.

Dad. News flash. Your kid can't sing. That is not a bad thing. Sure they do other things well. But don't make your kid feel like they are really good at something if they are not necessarily good at it. But at the same time find the things that they are good at and affirm them in it. Notice that it says, bring them up and the nurture and the training of the Lord. It doesn't say beat them down.

It says bring them up. And by the way that word phrase bring them up means to nourish or to feed. So we want to encourage our children. Sure we want to teach them good manners. Sure we want to teach them to be hardworking. We want them to be responsible. But the most important thing we do with our kids is we point them to Jesus Christ.

But listen to this. We cannot lead a child any further than we ourselves have come. We cannot lead a child any further than we ourselves have come. Nothing can happen through us until it has happened to us. So we ourselves need to be walking with God.

As Paul wrote in Philippians 4.9, the things that you have learned and received and heard and seen in me practice these things and the God of peace will be with you. I read the story of a father and a son who were climbing a mountain. They came to a place where the climbing was difficult and even dangerous. And the father stopped to consider which way he should go. And he heard his little boy behind him say, choose the good path dad.

I am coming right behind you. And that is something to remember parent. Your children.

They are watching you. Choose the right path. They are going to not just do what you say.

They are going to do what you do. So how do we do this? How do we raise our children in the way of the Lord? You do it by spending a lot of time with Him. There is the idea of quality time versus quantity time.

Reality check. Kids need time. And lots of it. Spend as much time as you can with Him. And then through that time you have with Him you teach Him the things of God. Not just in a bedtime story. Not just in a few moments you set aside and you have a devotion with Him.

Though those are great things for a family to do. But you try to find teaching moments throughout the day. In Deuteronomy 6 verse 4 we read that these words that God gave to the Israelites they were to teach to their children diligently. And it goes on to say, You shall talk to them when you sit down in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up. See the idea is you do it all day long looking for those moments.

Those teaching moments if you will. You know some Christian parents kind of lock their home down where they can have any secular influence at all. We don't have a television in our home. And you know if you have made that choice I am not being critical of you. Maybe it is a very good choice for you and your family. But I just want you to know your kids are still going to see TV ok. They are going to watch it at their friend's house or they are going to see it in the mall walking along. They are going to still get that influence. And most kids today aren't looking to TV anyway. They are looking to the Internet.

And even if you don't have Internet in your home they can get it on their phone or on a friend's phone. So here is the deal. Culture is going to influence your children. So you can try to isolate them in a Christian cocoon or you can wake up and smell the coffee. I say instead of trying to isolate our children from every other influence let's prepare them to go into the real world with a Christian worldview. That's it. But one of the most oft quoted verses and misunderstood verses about raising children is Proverbs 22 says.

You all know this one. Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it. And we will usually quote this verse when our kids have gone prodigal. Well remember train up a child in the way he should go. And I am not refuting that. It is a good verse to quote.

But let's just hope that we did what that Scripture said. What does it mean when it says train up a child in the way that they should go. Well it is an interesting phrase. Because it actually speaks of the actions of a midwife who after delivering a child would put her finger into crushed dates and then place her finger in the baby's mouth thus creating a thirst for milk. So that phrase means if we were to just sort of take that idea and play it out create a thirst in your child for spiritual things. However the word that is used also can be translated to bring a horse into submission.

Sort of like breaking a horse. So put that all together. And you have the idea of provide parameters as well as providing motivation for the child to walk with the Lord. But what does it mean when it says a child.

I mean when does child raising stop. Well this word child is translated in one place as an infant. In another place in Scripture as a young boy. In another place it describes Ishmael in his preteen years. And then it also describes Joseph at age 17. And in another verse it describes a young man ready for marriage. Child therefore speaks of infancy to young adulthood.

So don't think that your child raising is over once your kids hit the teen years. It goes on. So put it all together. Here is what that verse is saying.

Create a thirst in. Build into the child from infancy to adulthood the experience of submission to God. We put in external boundaries as well as eternal motivation. Clear instruction from Scripture today on A New Beginning. Pastor Greg Laurie with his message called Hope for Prodigal Children.

And there's more to come in this study. You know in a way we're all prodigal children. We've all strayed from our Heavenly Father. But God beckons us to come back to him.

Have you done that? Have you come to the Father to have your sins forgiven? Pastor Greg what would you say to the person who would like to do that right now?

I would say that God is just a prayer away. You know it doesn't take years to become a Christian. It doesn't take months. Frankly it doesn't even take hours.

It can happen so quickly. It just starts with you saying to God I know I'm a sinner. I know that you love me. I know that you sent Jesus to die on the cross for my sin and pay for those sins and then to rise again from the dead and I want him to come into my life. So here's my question to you.

Have you done that yet? Because Jesus who did die on that cross and rose again from the dead three days later is alive and standing at the door of your life right now and he's knocking and he's saying if you'll hear my voice and open the door I will come in. Would you like your sin forgiven? Would you like to know that when you die you will go to heaven?

Do you want Christ to come into your life right now? If so why don't you just stop whatever it is you're doing and pray this prayer with me. You could pray it out loud. You can pray it in the quietness of your own heart but pray this prayer to God. Say Lord Jesus I know that I am a sinner but I know that you are the savior who died on the cross for my sin and rose again from the dead. I'm sorry for my sin and I turn from it now and I choose to follow you from this moment forward. I ask all of this in Jesus name.

Amen. Listen if you just prayed that prayer the Bible promises that God has heard your prayer and has answered that prayer. The Bible says that we will confess our sin. He's faithful and just to forgive us our sin and cleanse us from all unrighteousness. So God bless you.

You've made the right decision. The decision to follow Jesus Christ. Yeah yeah that's right and listen Pastor Greg would like to help you get started off right living for the Lord. He'd like to send you his New Believers Bible. It features hundreds of helps for new believers and it's written in an easy to understand Bible translation. So contact us for your own free copy of the New Believers Bible.

Call us at 1-800-821-3300. That's 1-800-821-3300 or just go online to harvest.org and click know God. You know Pastor Greg we hear from people all the time who tell us how these daily studies have impacted their lives. So many have found the Lord and been encouraged through this teaching.

That's right. And we hope our listeners might pray about making an investment so these studies can continue. Yeah it's really true Dave you know and even a little bit helps. You know people need to hear the gospel so badly. They need to hear the teaching of the word of God.

It changes everything because it changes us and I'm so passionate about it and I'm called to do it and I'm thankful for it but I can't do it alone. So I'm going to ask folks that are listening if you think more people need to hear the gospel if you believe more people need to hear the teaching of the word of God then perfectly consider investing in Harvest Ministries and maybe even become a Harvest partner which means you're someone who stands with us every month in your faithful giving and that opens up a lot of new opportunities for us. So thanks for that. Yeah that's right and we really are thankful for your partnership. You can reach us anytime day or night at 1-800-821-3300. That's 1-800-821-3300.

Or just go online to harvest.org. Well next time more insight on child rearing and something special. Pastor Greg's son Jonathan gives his personal testimony. That's next time. Join us here on A New Beginning with pastor and Bible teacher Greg Laurie.