Let's Talk About Heaven: Coping with the Loss of Loved Ones

You're listening to A New Beginning with Greg Laurie, a podcast made possible by Harvest Partners helping people everywhere know God.

Visit our website and learn more about Harvest Partners at harvest.org. There is a desire in us. There is a craving in us that nothing on this earth will ever satisfy. It will only be satisfied when we are with the Lord. In 2008, Pastor Greg Laurie and his wife Kathy got the news no parent should ever get. They learned their son had suddenly and unexpectedly gone to heaven.

It was a loss they obviously still feel today. And on the recent anniversary of their son's passing, Pastor Greg was thinking about heaven. Today on A New Beginning, we present the message Pastor Greg brought his congregation that day. It's a very personal view of one of the most important issues we can consider.

This is the day, the day when life begins. And then, you know, sometimes I won't turn right at the next off-ramp because I know it's better to go a different way so I will disobey GPS. And then I will, you know, recalculate, recalculate, recalculate, recalculate, recalculate. Then I will come back, turn right at the next off-ramp, turn right at the next off-ramp. I don't know about your GPS but when I don't do it after I turn a couple of off-ramps down it says, why didn't you turn right at the last off-ramp? I told you to turn right at the last off-ramp so I have to go into the features and disable nag. It's in there. Stop. Stop.

I made all that up. Remember that movie 2001 A Space Odyssey? Remember that computer Howl? Yeah, that freaks me out a little bit. These machines telling us what to do. I read a story about a motorist relying on GPS in Milwaukee that ended up on a snowmobile trail several miles down the frozen path and they stopped and they couldn't turn around. So they are underneath a foot and a half of snow and they call 911. The officer responding said, people shouldn't believe everything these things tell you, you know.

Just because the machine tells you to do it doesn't mean you should do it. Now you take the sophisticated technology that actually works with satellites and consider the fact that it is built into birds. It is called a homing instinct. Consider a bird known as the Manx Shearwater. That would be a good name for a child by the way if you are thinking to one, let's name him Manx Shearwater.

He would have to be British, wouldn't he? Hello, my name is Manx Shearwater and what is your name? Well this is an actual bird. I am not making this bird up.

Manx Shearwater. They rest off the coast of Wales so of course they would have a British accent. They have an uncanny homing instinct. Scientists took a number of these Manx Shearwaters and tagged and released them at different points around the globe to see if they could find their way back home to the coast of Wales. One bird was released in Boston 3,200 miles from home and in 12 days that bird returned to his nest traveling 250 miles per day to a place it had never been to before to reach home.

That is a homing instinct. Then there is another bird called the golden plover. The golden plover. Native to Hawaii the plover migrates during the summer to the Aleutian Islands 1,200 miles away. Then they mate. They lay their eggs and their little fledglings are born.

The golden plovers go back to Hawaii and then the little birds that are just being born fly to Hawaii. They have never been to Hawaii before. They don't have a GPS that says turn right at the next island.

They just know how to get to Hawaii 1,200 miles away. Talk about a homing instinct. So the next time someone calls you a bird brain take that as a compliment. I think God has built in us a little spiritual GPS if you will. It is like a homing instinct. And it is a homing instinct for a place we have never been to before. It is a homesickness for heaven. And you are born with it. You don't know that necessarily but there is this sort of yearning deep down inside of you going back to the earliest days of your childhood. Maybe you thought it was going to be satisfied by certain things through your life when you realize with the passing of time it isn't. And just like those mink shearwaters and golden plovers you are headed somewhere.

A place you have never been before because that is where your citizenship is as a believer. The Bible says God has placed eternity in our hearts. We are not highly evolved animals. We are made uniquely in the image of God with a soul and a desire to know the God who created us. The Bible says this about our lives in 1 Chronicles 29 15. We are here only for a moment.

Visitors and strangers in the land as our ancestors were before us. Our days on earth are like a shadow gone so soon without a trace. Isn't that an accurate description of life. Now when you are young life seems to go slowly. But as you get older can you believe how quickly life goes.

How quickly a week goes and a month and then a year. And that is the way it is. And the reason we have this longing is because we are citizens of a different place. You might say we have dual citizenship. I mean we are citizens of the planet earth.

Of course we are American citizens. But then for those of us that have put our trust in Christ we are heavenly citizens. Philippians 3 20 says we are citizens of heaven where the Lord Jesus Christ lives and we are eagerly waiting for Him to return as our Savior. So there is a desire in us. There is a craving in us that nothing on this earth will ever satisfy. It will only be satisfied when we are with the Lord.

As Augustine said quote you formed us for yourself and our hearts are restless until they find their rest in you. End quote. I heard the story of a little boy that was out flying a kite and it had gone up so high he couldn't see it any longer. And someone walked up to him and saw the little boy tugging on that string. And then they said, Where is your kite? He said, Up there. And the person said, Well I can't see your kite. The boy said, It is there. And the person said, How do you know it is there? He said, I feel its tug.

And we feel the same thing. We feel the pull. The tug of heaven deep down inside. Now talking about heaven causes me to focus and think about where my son is right now. And there are some of you listening to me right now who have a loved one that is in heaven.

Well how many of you have a loved one in heaven? Raise your hand. Maybe it is a child. Maybe it is a sibling.

Maybe it is a parent or a grandparent. These are all hard. Everyone is hard in its own way. When you have lost a loved one you really dread birthdays and death days.

I mean we can call them something else if it makes us feel better. But we remember that is the day our loved one left us. Actually all days are hard. Birthdays are hard. Christmas is hard. Easter is hard.

Everything is hard. It is amazing how every day it seems like or every occasion is loaded with memories that we didn't even know we had that sort of are released when those days come. But there are a lot of hurting people out there. And I joined a club I never wanted to join. It is a club of those who have lost loved ones and specifically children. And people just pour their hearts out whenever I address this.

And they tell me their stories. And I was in tears reading the stories of other people today who had lost children and talked about how we have inspired them. And I thank God for that. That despite this pain and tragedy if we can bring a little hope, a little comfort to someone else I won't say it is all worth it. But I will say I am thankful God has allowed us to have some joy despite this tragedy.

If you want me to be honest I would have my son back in a heartbeat and I would give anything and everything for that. But I am not given that opportunity. So I just say, Well Lord I don't want to waste my pain.

How can I use it for Your glory? There is just a lot of hurting people out there. And in a way I speak to them and in another way I speak for them because I know what they are going through. And so we have hope and that hope is in heaven.

Listen to this. As a Christian we never say goodbye. We just say, I will see you later. If they trusted the Lord we will see each other later. It is not goodbye forever.

I mean see you later. I heard the story of a Christian man that was on his death bed. And he called his three sons in. Two of them were believers so he said to his sons, Goodbye my sons.

I will see you in the morning. Then he turned to his third son who was not a Christian and with sadness in his voice he said, Goodbye son. And the boy said, Father why did you say goodbye to me and then to my brothers. He said, I will see you in the morning. And the father said, Because son you have not put your faith in Christ so I can't say that I will see you in the morning.

So I am just saying goodbye because I don't think I will ever see you again. The son began to weep. Father I want to see you again. And the father said, Well son you have to put your faith in Christ and then we will be reunited.

And the boy did. See that is the hope of the Christian. We will see you in the morning.

We will see you again. Death is not the end. Now that does not mean when a loved one dies that we are not sad. Of course we grieve. Maybe in some ways Christians grieve more deeply than non-Christians.

Because we love. Your depth of sorrow is an indication of your depth of love. If you love someone and they are gone then you sorrow deeply.

But here is the thing. We don't grieve hopelessly. We grieve hopefully.

There is a big difference. We grieve. We grieve like any person grieves. We cry. Never say to someone who has lost a loved one, Don't cry. They are in heaven.

Don't say that. Because it hurts to lose someone. And the Bible even says there is a time to mourn. So don't tell someone they shouldn't cry when the Bible says they should cry. You need to just pray for them. Because maybe you don't know what it is like.

What they are going through at that moment. But you see we have hope and we know that we will be reunited with that person again. So I think that thinking about heaven is one of the best things that we can do.

Because heaven becomes much more real to you when you have a loved one there. Pastor Greg Laurie will have the second half of his message in just a moment. It is a joy to hear when these studies have truly impacted lives. Listen to these comments from one of our listeners. It has been a very lonely year and I know that it is because I have strayed from God. But because of your lessons on the radio I have finally received the wake up call I needed. And I am getting back into reading the Bible and devoting my life to Jesus. Thank you Pastor Greg for your passion and wisdom. I have been rejuvenated as a Christian and I look forward to listening to more of your lessons. It is a blessing to know that listeners are hearing these messages and God is using His word to touch hearts. How have Pastor Greg's studies impacted your life?

Would you let him know? Drop an email to Greg at Harvest dot org. That is Greg at Harvest dot org. Well today we are thinking about the afterlife and Pastor Greg's message, Let's Talk About Heaven.

And to get a replay of today's study go online to Harvest dot org. Now we have our questions about heaven. What is heaven like? What will we do in heaven? What will our new bodies be like? Will we know one another in heaven?

Well let's talk about that. We are going to read Colossians chapter 3. Look there if you would. We will read more of it later. But right now let's just read verses 1 and 2 of Colossians 3.

The apostle Paul writes and he says, Since then you have been raised with Christ. Set your hearts on things above. Where Christ is seated at the right hand of God, set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.

We will stop there. Now this phrase set your minds speaks of a diligent, active, single-minded investigation. This could be translated think or more thoroughly have this inner disposition. So here is a real simple way to translate what I just read. Think about heaven or even a simpler way think heaven.

I like that. Think heaven. The verb in this verse is in the present tense which means keep thinking about and keep seeking heaven. Our feet must be on the earth but our minds should be in heaven.

But here is a problem. Many of us will go through a day, sometimes a week, perhaps even a month without a single thought about heaven. Now you say, but how can I be thinking about and seeking heaven? I have never been to heaven. I don't know what heaven is like. Well the way that you know what heaven is like is through the careful study of the Bible. The Bible is the authoritative source on heaven on really every topic.

Now let me take it a step further. The Bible is the only source on heaven. I know people write these books and sometimes the books are made into movies and we say that is the way it is.

Listen. I don't believe someone's word just because they allege to have gone to heaven. They may be telling the truth. They may be making it up. They may be delusional.

I don't know what they are. All I know is everything I need to know about heaven is found in the Bible. And I will take the words of whoever that person is that is written about their visit to the afterlife and I will compare it to Scripture. And if it doesn't line up with Scripture then I am not going to accept what that person says. And that is a very important thing for us to know because there are so many books about the afterlife right now.

But I can trust the Word of God. So I need to be heavenly minded. Now of course we immediately think oh yes but you know people who are heavenly minded are so out of touch. You have heard the expression, oh they are so heavenly minded they are no earthly good.

That is such a stupid expression. I know a lot of people that are so earthly minded they are no heavenly good. I mean what does it mean to be heavenly minded? To have my head in the clouds and be out of touch with reality?

Absolutely not. Those that think the most about the next life do the most in this one. So it is not a disconnectedness. It is a person that just recognizes that life on earth has a beginning, middle, and end. We recognize that we don't know when this life will end. We recognize there is an afterlife. There is future reward and there is future judgment for those that do not believe. And that affects us in the way we live now. See you are not going to just do whatever you want if you really believe that there is a future judgment.

And it is going to motivate you to do good things and godly things if you believe that there are future rewards. So it really affects us in the way that we live. So now let's talk about His location. Where is God? Well in a broad sense as we learn God is omniscient.

And that means that God is what? Everywhere. He is everywhere. He is here. He is with us when we leave.

He is overseas. He is in every place at every time. You can't escape from the Lord. Psalm 139 7. I will never escape from Your Spirit.

I will never get away from Your presence. If I go to heaven You are there. But having said that heaven is the dwelling place of God Himself. And I think this longing for heaven that we all have deep down inside is really a longing for God. Psalm 63 1.

The psalmist says, Oh God, You are my God. I earnestly search for You. My soul thirsts for You.

My whole body longs for You in this parched and weary land where there is no water. And the Bible promises a day is coming when we will see God face to face. Jesus said in the Beatitudes, Blessed are the pure in heart for they shall see God. You will see God.

Not in this body. If you were to see God in this body you would like just blow up on the spot. But one day we will see Him. And seeing God will be like seeing everything else for the first time. Because not only will we see God but He will be the lens at which we see everything else. People.

Ourselves. And the events of this life. I am telling you when you get to heaven everything is going to suddenly make sense to you. Because you are going to see everything from a different perspective. Sometimes people suggest that when we get to heaven we have a collective spiritual lobotomy.

Here is how the reasoning goes. Well we will have to forget certain things in heaven because if we knew certain things heaven wouldn't be heaven. We would be miserable. Well look God is not going to do a brain wipe on you.

You are going to have perspective. Sort of like when my grandkids are playing with toys you know and something happens traumatic like the head of a doll comes off. And they are very little and they are upset and they cry. And Papa the doll's head came off and I tried to screw the head back on you know and it is not working. And I say don't worry about it. But Papa the doll. Don't worry about it.

But Papa. Because I probably have a spare in the closet. Because I bought quantities of little plastic dolls for these kids.

Or if I don't have a spare I am going to go get them one. So I say don't worry about it. Why? Because I know what is going to happen and I know what is going to take place.

And it will be better than what they even have now. So I can say with assurance don't worry. But all they see is the decapitated doll. That is all they see. You see. So we are in life and things happen and they don't make sense and we say this is wrong. This is unfair.

This is so hard. And God says don't worry about it. No but God you don't see what I see. God says I see what you see.

Don't worry about it. And one day when we get to heaven we will see it from His perspective. So I don't think in heaven we forget everything. The fact is you know more in heaven not less. And that sort of addresses the question will we recognize one another in heaven. My response is would you think you will be more stupid in heaven than you are on earth. You will know more in heaven not less. The Bible says in 1 Corinthians 13 we will know as we are known. And I will even take it a step further. I don't think we just get to heaven and our brains explode.

They are 30 feet wide. Big brain. You know I think we will even learn in heaven. We will continue to learn.

We will continue to grow. But we will have a divine perspective when we get there. That is the hope of the follower of Jesus Christ.

When we see God face to face. Today on A New Beginning, some great reassurance about heaven from Pastor Greg Laurie and his message called Let's Talk About Heaven. And we will hear more from Pastor Greg in just a moment as he comments about reuniting with loved ones in heaven. Now this study has touched many hearts over the years and we would encourage you to share it with someone who needs this hope. Mention they can hear it on our website, harvest.org.

Just look for the study called Let's Talk About Heaven. Well we are making available an excellent resource. In fact two resources from renowned children's author Sally Lloyd-Jones. And Pastor Greg you have the eye of an artist. In fact you were a graphic artist back before you actually started preaching.

So when you look at children's picture books, what are you noticing? Well I would describe myself as an advanced doodler over a graphic artist. But I actually for a while did do graphic design. I drew my little cartoon booklets and I design album covers and posters and other things like that.

But I love design. Wait a minute, you're being humble. The very first tract you designed, how many of those went out into circulation? A lot. It was in the middle. Wasn't it like a million?

It was well over a million. They went all around the world and it was the simplest of illustrations. You know sometimes in design less is more. And this might surprise some people but when I designed something, first and foremost I wanted to be cool.

I wanted to grab the eye of the person who's seen it. Then that draws them into the message that I'm seeking to convey. And what I love about Sally's work is she's such a great writer. It's so simple. But it's not simplistic.

It's profound in its deep but it's simple. Sally understands what to say and what not to say. And she has such a gift in communicating as she speaks. She has such a beautiful voice and she's a great storyteller. But also when she writes, it's just the right amount of words on the page with a perfect design to support it. The kind of thing that will draw a child in. You can set your little child on your lap or your grandchild and read with them through it.

And what I often do is as after I read it I'll have them point things out to me. Where's the balloon? Where's the dog? Where's this?

Where's that? No point. So they really absorb it and give them, I don't rush through it. I give them time to sort of take it in and then I might ask them a question and something to engage them in the story. I mean this is what Jesus did when he told parables. Parables are like saying once upon a time. Because parables were not true stories.

They were illustrations. A parable has been defined as an earthly story with a heavenly meaning. So he would tell the story to make a point. The kingdom of God is like this or a sower went out to sow seed and this happened, etc.

Or a father had two sons. You know so he would tell these amazing stories. That's what Sally does in these beautiful books that she writes from the Jesus Storybook Bible to this brand new book that we're offering right now simply called Near. So I think you're going to love this resource even more. I think your children and grandchildren are going to love it as well. And we're not only including this book called Near but we're also including a special edition of the Bible for little ones newborn to age four. It's called Baby's Carry Along Bible. It's so cute I want to carry one myself.

But I'm afraid people will think I've lost my mind. But it's very thick pages with bold illustrations. Some of the great stories of the Bible like Little David Beats Goliath, God Saves Daniel in the Lion's Den, Baby Jesus is Born, Jesus Stops a Storm, Jesus is Alive, and on it goes. Great material, great resources. Let us get you copies of all of this as quickly as possible. Yeah, we have them ready to send your way. We want to send you both Near and Baby's Carry Along Bible to thank you for partnering with us. We appreciate it that you tune in. We appreciate it that you pray for Pastor Greg. And we appreciate it when you invest so that these studies can continue.

Really, it's the only way they can. We don't have any churches or large organizations paying all the expenses. So thank you for sending your donation today to A New Beginning, Box 4000, Riverside, CA 92514. Or call 1-800-821-3300. You can reach us anytime 24 hours a day at that number 1-800-821-3300.

Or just go online to harvest.org. Well, next time here on A New Beginning, more insights on heaven and checking our assumptions and expectations about our eternal home. As we close, though, we want to hear some comments Pastor Greg made on a talk show called Pastor's Perspective, heard in Southern California on KWVE radio. He and co-host Don Stewart received a call from a father with a question that relates to our study today.

Let's listen. Pastor, I heard you talking about losing your son and I lost my son eight years ago. And I often think about what it's going to be like when I'm reunited with him and I notice that you're kind of a painter and you kind of take pictures for people with your descriptions. And I just wanted to hear from your perspective what you think it's going to be like when you're reunited with your son. I think about it often.

And I talk to a lot of people in my job. I'm a suicide case manager and I talk to a lot of people about things like that to just get different perspectives. I wanted to hear yours, Pastor. That's such a great question and it's clearly the question from a father that has lost a son because you would think about that and I have thought about that.

I don't have a definitive answer, Don, but I think of it in a real sense. And by that I mean, you know, I think about seeing him. I think about things I might ask him.

You know, when my son was very young, his nickname was Topher, short for Christopher, I'd carry him around on my shoulders and he would always point at things, this little guy, and he'd say, sat, which was his way of saying, what's that? And I'd say, well, that's a tree. Sat. Well, that's a bird. Sat. That's another tree. Sat.

That's a car. Sat. He was just an inquisitive little guy and I sort of envisioned myself getting up to heaven and saying, whoa, sat. That's a sea of glass, Dad. Sat. You know, and he starts describing heaven for me and of course my next question would be, when's lunch? Anytime, Dad. You know, so I guess you envisioned that you would sort of be catching up on old times. You would just, I can't say really, but it's going to be a glorious reunion and I look forward to it very much and it is the great hope that we have as Christians and I believe you'll be reunited with them again.