Hey there. Thanks for listening to the Greg Laurie Podcast, a ministry supported by Harvest Partners.
I'm Greg Laurie encouraging you if you want to find out more about Harvest Ministries and learn more about how to become a Harvest Partner, just go to harvest.org. the bottom line. This whole life is about a relationship with Jesus, not about rules and regulations. Guys tell me, oh, it's so hard to be a Christian. And I said, no, it's not. Because you think you have to sit down after you become a Christian, study the Ten Commandments and figure out how am I going to keep them one at a time?
It's not about that. When you get into this relationship with Jesus, He transforms you from the inside out. The desires that you had at one time, they become less and less and less. As you build your relationship with Jesus, it becomes easier.
You know, people, I want to tell you this. Those of you that are struggling, I know some of you this morning, we all, we have issues in our life. You know, you're thinking, oh, man, you know, I'm a sinner. How is God going to forgive me? What's He going to do?
How can I overcome this? You know, the sign of a Christian is not perfection. Bible makes it clear. We're never going to be perfect.
There's only one perfect person that ever walked the face of the earth, and that was Jesus. The sign of a Christian is when we fall and when we sin, we feel it because we have this Jesus conscious. We get down on our knees, we say, Lord, help me. I don't want to do this again. We ask for forgiveness.
And you know what? We are forgiven. That's the sign of a Christian. We do get better.
We don't live in a pattern of sin. That's what it's all about. And I want to tell any one of you that are struggling, any one of you, there were times when I was on the street that I did some things I was very uncomfortable with. And I mean that.
But you know what? I did them anyway. I was a knowing and willing sinner. And people, you know, when you do what I did in my life, you don't just get down on your knees, say a prayer and think it's all over at that point. No, I struggled mightily with forgiveness.
As a matter of fact, I went to a dear friend at one point early on in my ministry. And I said, hey, bro, why are people going to listen to me? They're asking me to come and tell my story.
If I was in the audience, I wouldn't listen to you, to me, you know? And he looked at me and I thought he was really going to console me. And he said, Franz, stop being a wimp. I said, oh, wait a minute.
I don't forget who you're talking to here. I got a little insulted with that. I said, what do you mean by that? I said, I'm coming to you asking for some advice and you talk to me like that? He said, yeah, because you're insulting me right now.
I said, insulting you? What does this have to do with you? And he said, I'll tell you what. He said, my Lord and Savior died a horrible death. He was nailed to the cross. He was spat upon. He was scourged. He died a horrible death for the forgiveness of all sins. And you tell me you're too much of a tough guy, mob guy.
It didn't cover your sins. He said, don't insult me like that. Whoa. When he said it to me like that, I really thought. He said, Michael, let me ask you a question. Are you sorry for the sins that you committed? I said, yeah, I believe so. I feel it in my heart.
You know, sometimes we don't even know if we're sincere. I said, yeah, I feel that way. He says, well, then let me tell you something. God's got a plan and a purpose for your life. He said, stop allowing the enemy to remind you what our God has already forgotten.
Go and do your work. Whoa. Really had an impact on me. And from that moment on, I started to realize Jesus died for the forgiveness of all sins. Any of you are struggling out there. If you believe God has done a work in my life, what are you worried about? And I really mean that.
God is here for you, and He'll always be here for you. So this morning I want to talk about defining moments in our life, moments that had such an impact on us in some way could change the course of our lives. And of course, what does it all lead up to? That defining moment when we ask for forgiveness of our sins and we accept Christ as our Savior. That is the defining moment in all of our lives. That's it.
That guarantees us all of eternity in paradise. What is more defining than that? But there are defining moments, some big ones. I've had a lot of them in my life. And when you listen to my story, think about your own. This is not about me. I want to get you to think. What were those defining moments in your life that had such a dramatic impact on you? Maybe you graduate college, a whole new career. It's big.
Get married. Of course, that's a big one. You know, a lot of things. God forbid, a sickness that just changes the direction of your life. Did it have an impact in a good way? Even in bad things, it can have an impact in a good way. God used some things in my life that weren't pleasant to bring me to where I am today. So think about that. Think of everything really as a blessing if it's leading you towards the Lord. Think about that. You know, the first, and there are the defining moments that are not too significant.
Let me give you one. We just moved into a new house. Oh, I can't tell you what it is to move for two weeks. We only moved a block away, believe it or not. Don't ask me how that all happened, but it was great.
It turned out great for us. But we painted the house, right? So my wife, you know, I don't know if you know this.
They've got these new things now. They're kind of a piece of paper, and it's the color of the paint. And then there's a little patch on there that you can give to the painter so he can go and buy it, right? So I walk into our bedroom.
There's 25 of these all over the wall, right? She's deciding. Now, my wife is very definite, but it takes her time to get there. You know, she looks at things.
It takes her time. So she picks out this paint. I hire the painter.
He paints the house. It looks beautiful. We walk into the room, and it was kind of like a cream color, and she said to me, Does that look a little yellow to you?
Now, this is a defining moment because I know where it's going, right? We're going to be repainting the room. I said, No, honey, it looks great. No, it looks great.
I get a hold of my daughter. She says, Mom's saying it's a different color. Make sure you tell her it's the same color, the cream color, right? Because I'm already hiring the new painter, right? So she has no care what I say.
It doesn't matter, right? It's all about her. So I'm saying, honey, this is good.
Don't worry. The blue couch, we're going to fix everything up. P.S., new painter. Hired the painter.
Had to pay him all over again. Defining moment, right? So we have some small ones like that, but the big ones are the ones that really matter, and I'll tell you the first one in my life. You know, my mom was 15 years old when she met my father and 16 years old when I was born. I was born out of wedlock, and my dad had been married before. He was 17 years older than my mom.
He had been married before, and he had three children from the first marriage, brought them into the house because he had a divorce, and I don't know what happened with his first wife. And my mother was young, and she had a very hard time adjusting to these three kids, and at times she wasn't really nice to them. And so I was brought up believing that I was adopted by my father.
And I saw how my mother treated those kids, and I always thought that my father was going to turn on me. So early on in my life, I wanted to be the best possible son I could be. I did everything right for him. I was great in school. I was a good athlete. I did everything to please my dad. Always worried that he was going to turn on me, but he never did, and I loved him so much for that, really.
And I think it was a good thing because he showed me determination. He showed me how to strive to be the best, just that I did it on my own. My dad was a vitamin nut. He took 30 vitamins a day. He wanted vitamins with us all the time. He used to chase us around with cod liver oil.
For those of you my age, remember the little rascals, cod liver oil? And all the kids would run away except for me. I'd stand there with my mouth open, okay, I'd give it to him. He loved me for that, right? So, you know, and then later on in life, I write this book, Quitting the Mob, and my co-author, and I was over 50 years old at this point, my co-author interviews my mother. And she tells him, this first time she reveals this, Michael had nothing to worry about.
That was really his father. We just never wanted to say it because I was 16 and, you know, you didn't do that. You didn't have a child out of wedlock at the time. And she never even told me. She told the author. And I went to see her. I said, Ma, all these years, you never said anything to me? She said, what's the difference? He's your father.
Just like that, right? People have said to me, Michael, you should get a DNA test. I says, what does it matter at this point? He's my dad. I loved him.
But you know what? It was a defining moment in my life because it taught me something that was really important, you know, to be determined, to try to be the best. I try to do what I do, you know, I try to be the best at it when I do it.
Defining moment. You know, the next thing, my dad didn't want this life for me. He wanted me to go to school, be a doctor. Son, stay off the street, get an education.
That's what it's all about. And I'll tell you, I grew up differently than a lot of people in here. My dad was a very high profile figure, always under arrest, always law enforcement around us all the time. I grew up hating the police because I loved my father. I saw the police as the enemy. I hated the government, hated them, hated law enforcement. Now, I want to be clear, I don't feel that way anymore.
I realize, you know, that they were the good guys, we were the bad guys. And people, I have to tell you this. This whole defunding the police movement was the most ridiculous thing I ever heard in my life, you know.
I don't get it. You know, people used to say to me, Michael, you must be happy that they're defunding the police. And I said, really? Why? I said, I have a wife, I have a daughter, I have grandchildren, when they walk down the street, who's going to protect them?
You or me? No, we rely on the police, we need law enforcement. Well, you know, some of these cops were bad. Give me any organization on the face of the earth that doesn't need reform. Government needs reform, the Catholic Church needs reform, foundations, everything needs reform. It doesn't make it bad. We need the police and I am strongly in favor of them.
I support them in any which way that I can. So, but back then it was different and I loved my dad very much. I loved him, right? So, he gets indicted, he gets convicted on a big case, masterminding a nationwide string of bank robberies, and they sentenced him to 50 years in prison. I was a pre-med student at Hofstra University at the time. When dad went in, I was devastated. He was 50, went in, went in, figured I had 50 on top of that, he'd never come out of prison alive. Joe Colombo, the boss of the Colombo family, my dad's family at that time, he kind of took me under his wing. We were very close with him.
He started this Italian-American civil rights league at the time to try to say that, you know, the government, the FBI was harassing Italian-Americans. He put up this whole league and I was very involved in that. And during that time, I thought the league would help my father get out of prison. Because people, I'll tell you this, I went to jail for a crime that I was guilty of. I pled guilty, did my time. My dad obviously did a lot of bad things on the street, so did I. But that particular crime that he did 40 years on that 50 of, he was innocent of. My dad was an old bank robber, I'll take that to my grave. Investigated that case thoroughly, spoke to every witness, recanted their testimony, gave them lie detector tests, proved they lied at the trial.
We could never get the conviction overturned. My dad did 40 years out of 50 on a crime he didn't commit. But you know, what does that tell you? It's what I tell young people, these gang bankers, when I go into prisons and speak to them. The system is not always fair.
You get that bullseye on your back, you get that target, you're going to go down. Best way to avoid it, stay away from it. Don't get involved, you're not going to beat them. You're part of a gang organized crime, you're not going to beat them in this country.
They got too many weapons, too powerful. But I was very affected by that, I went to see my dad in prison. Dad, going to school, how am I going to help you?
You're going to die in here, if I don't help you get out in some way. No, son, I don't want that for you. We went back and forth. It was the first time I had a little bit of an argument with my dad, but I was a pretty headstrong kid.
At one point, he just threw up his hands, he said, OK, son, but if you're going to be on the street, I want you on the street the right way. And during that meeting, he proposed me for membership into the Colombo family. And people, when you get involved in that life, you can't go up to somebody and say, I'd like to join, what do I have to do?
No, you don't do that. Somebody has to propose you, vouch for you, say that you have what it takes. In my case, it was my dad.
And there's a lot of nepotism in that life. A lot of fathers bring their sons in, relatives, kind of for security reasons. So he said to me, go home, somebody's going to be in touch with you, do whatever you're told. That's all he said. He didn't prepare me, he didn't say this is what's required of you.
That's a secret life, and you're not supposed to talk about that life with anybody outside of it. If my dad was anything, he was a good soldier, he wouldn't violate that oath, even with me, his own son. He just knew I had it in me, go home and do what you're told.
And you know what? I didn't even question my dad. Not one bit. I said, dad, if this is what you want, I trust you, just point me in that direction.
Really. A couple of weeks later, I met with the boss of the family. Joe Colombo had been shot, seriously wounded. I happened to be 12 steps away from him when that happened.
It was another defining moment in my life to see that, you know, up close. He eventually died from the wounds. A new boss took over. His name was Tom Dibella. Tom has passed on now. Mike, I got a message from your father, he said, you want to become a member of this life?
Yes, I do. Well, here's the deal. From now on, 24 hours a day, seven days a week, you're on call to serve this family, the Colombo family. That means if your mother is sick and dying and you're at her bedside, we call you to serve us. You leave your mother, you come and serve us. From now on, we're number one in your life before anything and everything.
When and if we feel you deserve this privilege, this honor to become a member, we'll let you know. It's another defining moment, changing the course of my life from medical student now to guy on the street, mobster, gangster, whatever you want to call him, right? For the next two and a half years, I was in kind of like a pledge period where I had to do anything and everything I was told to do to prove myself worthy. It could have been something very menial, a lot of discipline in that life, a lot of respect, alleged respect, a lot of authority. You had a meeting at 8 o'clock, you weren't there at 7.30, you were late.
Never be late in that life. Drive the boss to a meeting, sit in a car three, four, five hours, God forbid you leave, go to the restroom, get a newspaper, he comes out, you're not there. Hey, we could have had a problem, you know, we needed to get away, you weren't there. I know I did that once, I paid the price.
A lot of stuff like that. And people, I want to be very honest with you this morning and this is for those of you that might be struggling in your own life here this morning. How could God forgive me?
How could he use me? People, that life at times is very violent. And it's hard for me to say this, but I want to be honest with you, and if you're part of that life, you're part of the violence.
And there's no escape. And if anybody tells you differently, they're either not being honest with you or they weren't a made member of that life. And I think you know what I mean. After about two and a half years, I proved myself worthy. Halloween night, 1975, I was called into a meeting with five other gentlemen. That night, we all took an oath and became sworn made members of the Colombo family. An oath I took very seriously back then. I take it very seriously today, even though I don't consider myself a member of that life anymore. You come into the life, you don't sign a contract. No retirement age, can't say, hey, I'm done. You know what they say when they say when you leave that life, either leave in a coffin or you join the government and enter a witness protection program.
Obviously, I've done neither. And it was a very solemn ceremony that I took that night. And look, what I know about that life is in my heart, my mind, not easily forgotten over 20 years. And basically, I grew up in it being my father's son, so I get it. I understand it.
Defining moment changed the direction of my life. But you know what, people? God has got his design on us.
The Bible tells us this from the minute we were conceived, not even before, from the minute we were in our mother's womb. He's got his design on us. He knew what he had in store for me. But you know what? It's up to us because we have a free will to go in God's direction. But he knows the path that we're going to take, but he's had his design on us from the moment we were placed in our mother's womb. Remember that.
And for those of us that accept that and accept him later on, we have, again, all of eternity to gain in paradise. So now, here I am. I'm a mobster. Well, you know, when I got into that life, I realized there was two different people in that life. They had the gangsters and they had the racketeers. Gangsters just hanging around, trying to grind out a living, doing whatever they do.
They weren't really successful in that life. And then there were the racketeers, the guys that were making the money. And I said, you know what? That's who I want to be. And I wanted to be the best possible mob guy I could be. And I rose in the ranks. They made me a captain. I made a lot of money. I'll be honest with you people. I had defrauded.
I think Jonathan mentioned this. I defrauded the government. I had a scheme to defraud the government. I had a tax on every gallon of gasoline. I ran it for eight years. Hide in my operation was selling a half a billion gallons of gas a month, taking down 20, 30, 40 cents a gallon.
Do the math, several million dollars a week at one point. And people, I'm going to be honest with you because I like to be honest up here. I got to make a confession. I have no moral issue right now with defrauding the government out of any kind of tax money. I have no moral issue.
Every time I go to a gas station, I think about it, okay? That's what happens. But I won't do it. I will not do it. I fight off the urge because I'm not going to put my wife and kids in that position ever again. But would I do it if that wasn't the case?
I don't know. You know, Jonathan, please forgive me. Don't get upset with me. But that's the truth.
But no, of course I wouldn't do that. But so, you know, I became a major target of law enforcement. I had seven indictments. I had two federal racketeering cases, one brought on by Rudy Giuliani. I had five state cases. I went to trial five times. I beat every case.
I was either acquitted or I was dismissed at trial. And so I had a pretty good thing. And I, you know, made a name for myself, not in a good way, out on the street. Defining moment. And then something happened. Another defining moment. And this was one of the biggest defining moments in my life. You know, when you're out on the street and you're one of the younger guys, you're making a lot of money, there's a lot of treachery in that life.
People are looking at you and they're watching you. And some things started to happen. There was a newspaper article that was written that I was becoming powerful enough to break away from the Columbus and start my own family. There was no truth to it whatsoever. It was a made-up article, right?
But it was out there and it affected some people. So they were starting to watch me a little closely. I was bringing a lot of money into the family. My dad was out on parole and he called me.
We were both captains at that point in time. So I went to see him at his house and he says to me, Mike, the boss wants to see us tonight. I said, OK, dad, what time do you want me to pick you up? And he said, well, they want to do this differently. They want me to come in first and they want you to come in second. I said, why, dad?
Why do they want that? I said, you know, there's been some talk on the street. I said, I don't want to do that. We go, we go together.
Why would we let them separate us? He said, no, son, we got an order. We got to obey the order. Always playing by the rules, right? I said, dad, we're not doing that. We're not going to let them separate.
I don't want you going in first. It's the first time I had a real argument with my dad. And, you know, basically we were the same rank even though I gave more respect for my dad because he was, you know, who he was. We argued for about a half an hour. And finally I threw up my hands. I said, dad, you know, I've listened to you all my life.
I don't like this, but if this is what you want, fine. I leave. Another captain in the family, a fellow by the name of Jimmy, a good friend of mine, calls me.
I was living in Long Island. He says, Michael, meet me in Brooklyn. And so I drive in and this had to be a covert meeting because our boss at the time, Carmine Persico, he was on parole also.
So it's a violation if you're, you know, associating with other people in that life. So we had to drive around a little bit and be careful that we didn't, you know, bring a tale of police with us. And so I get in Jimmy's car and there's a guy sitting in the back. And I'm saying, what is this guy doing here? I didn't really recognize him.
He wasn't a guy that took the oath, a maid guy. And I'm saying, why is he sitting in the back? And I'm talking to Jimmy and Jimmy's driving around because we had a meet in a house in Brooklyn. And I'm waiting for Jimmy to tell me what this meeting is about, but he don't talk to me. He talks to me about the Yankees. Now, I'm a diehard Yankee fan.
I didn't want to hear about the Yankees that night. I wanted to know what was going on. But he don't say anything, right? And so we get to this house and people want to tell you, one of the horrors of that life, really a horror of that life, is that you make a mistake, your best friend walks you into a room, you don't walk out again.
And obviously, over the 20 years I spent, I know of circumstances like that. So now we get to the house and we parked the car. It was a summer day in August. And we had to go into a basement apartment that this was taking place in. And I get out of the car and I hear Jimmy's car door slam and then I hear the guy in the back slam and I'm saying, why is this guy coming? He's not a maid guy.
He's not one of us. And people, I want to tell you, it was about a 30-yard walk from the car to that basement apartment. And I'm getting scared.
I'm saying something is wrong here. You know, when I tell this story, it becomes so vivid for me. It was a summer day. I could see the fireflies kind of moving around. I can smell the fragrance of the flowers because I really thought that I may not walk out of this room. And I was scared. My knees were starting to get weak.
My heart was thumping out of my chest. And people have said to me, well, why didn't you run, Mike? You could have cut and run. And I said, you know what?
It wasn't heroic. It was robotic. I was such a product of that life. I said, hey, if this is it, this is it. But I was scared. And when we walked down that stairs, I'm telling you, people, when that door opened, I don't know how I didn't faint.
I didn't want to show people that, but I was really scared. We walked into the room. Obviously, I'm here, so things worked out, right? And we started talking about the business and all this kind of stuff. And I started getting angry. I said, hey, guys, I'm doing all of this for the family. I'm taking all the risk. I'm bringing in all this money.
And you question me because of a news article? I started to get upset with the boss. You don't do that.
Something I've learned in life, even in a legitimate world, you never outshine the master. So I kind of got myself, brought it down. I said, OK, I'm going to walk out of here tonight. And everything is over. Hey, have a glass of wine.
Everything is great. I just wanted to get out of the room. I said, Jimmy, take me back to my car. I got a long ride.
So we get in the car. And I'm ready to blast Jimmy, verbally blast him, right? I was so upset with him. Sorry about that because I got to watch myself. Honey, I'm sorry.
But anyway, right? I'm really upset with him. And so I'm ready to say something. He looks at me. He says, Mike, wait, don't say anything. He says, I got to tell you something.
I said, what? He said, this was serious tonight. He said, you could have been in a lot of trouble. Now I got even more upset with him. I said, Jimmy, I know you my whole life.
We're friends. You knew that, and you didn't tell me? You were ready to walk me in that room. You didn't tell me? And he looked at me.
He was a smart guy. He said, well, let me ask you this. If it was the other way around, would you have told me? I thought about it for a moment. And I said, no. He said, Mike, you know this life is well or better than anybody.
You grew up in it. He said, that's the life we lead. And I really thought about it. And I said, wow. And I didn't say a word. And then he gets to where my car is, and I'm getting out of the car. And he grabs my arm right here. And he says, Michael, I'm going to tell you something. He says, you're not going to want to hear this, but I am your friend.
He said, you can take this to the bank. Those were his words. I said, what? He said, your father was in here before you tonight. He didn't help you one bit. He threw you under the bus.
I said, what? I was stunned. I couldn't even respond to him. And then I got out of the car, and I started walking back to my car.
And I was, like, baffled. And then knowing my father so well, and I verified this later, I knew what he did. He said, hey, I don't do anything.
I'm on parole. My son handles everything. If there's money missing, if there's a problem, you've got to talk to him. Instead of standing up for me, because my father had a lot of juice and a lot of respect in that life, he just left me on my own. And I was thinking, I say, wow, if this life can separate father and son, what do we really have here? Now, I didn't say a word.
In that life, you keep to yourself. You don't speak out of turn. I never discussed this with anybody.
I never said anything to my father. But two years later, 1984, I'm producing a movie in South Florida. Was that a defining moment, people? You bet it was, and I'm going to tell you why.
I'm producing a movie in Southern Florida, and I bring these dancers and cast and crew in from L.A. to work in the film. And I'm not going to go into the whole thing because she'll get mad at me. She'll roll her eyes.
She's sitting in the front. And how I seen her by the pool, okay, coming out of the water, and it was like a Pepsi commercial. Everything just went, you know, stopped for me. And it was love at first sight. I'm going to be honest with you. It was love at first sight.
Now we're married 40 years, so it worked back then, right? And because that life is an evil life, and I want to explain that, I'm not calling the guys evil. I was one of them. You know, there was good guys in that life, guys that I loved and guys that I missed. Why do good people do bad things? Sometimes you justify things or whatever. It doesn't make you a bad person. But we do bad things at times.
But the life is evil. Why do I say that? I don't know any family of any member of that life, including my own, not my wife and kids, mother, father, brothers and sisters, that hasn't been totally devastated. My mother, 33 years without her husband, when she passed away in 2012, I can only describe her relationship with my father as being ugly.
Why? Because she blamed him for everything that went wrong in her life, rightfully so. What went wrong? My baby sister dies of an overdose of drugs at the age of 27. My brother, a drug addict, 25 years. I can't even begin to tell you what he put the family through, me personally just trying to keep him alive on the street. My other sister, 40 years old, she was never mentally stable. She dies at the age of 40. The whole family devastated. And every family of every member of that life is the same.
So any lifestyle that does that to a family is an evil lifestyle. So now I'm falling in love with this young girl. She was a Christian. I wasn't buying into it, but she was real.
She separated herself from everybody. I saw it in her, and I respected her faith. She brings me home to meet her mother after I pursued her on the set. She wasn't having anything to do with me, but I knew there was something there, right? You've got to come to Anaheim and meet my mother.
She lived in Anaheim. I said, great, I'm great with moms, let's go. We get on a plane, we go meet her mom. Her mom, Irma, was the most godly woman I ever met in my life. You meet Irma for two minutes, your name goes into her prayer book. She had a prayer book like a telephone book, I'm not kidding. She didn't need to know your name, the boy on the street corner with one shoe, whatever, she prayed for you. I believe until this moment, people, that my mother-in-law prayed me to where I am today. I believe that.
I believe in the power of prayer because of her. So I said, I'm falling in love with this girl. Am I going to bring her into this life and she's going to have the same fate? I'm such a target, they're going to get me one way or the other.
I know I'm going to go down. So I had to make a choice. It was either the girl or the life. I chose the girl. It had nothing to do with her faith, I respected that, but great. I left my life, I betrayed my oath for selfish reasons.
I wanted the girl. But you know what, people, sometimes we walk parallel to God. What do I mean by that? We're walking down this road, and we're thinking, you know what, this is my plan. But at some point in time, God says, this isn't your plan, my son. This is my plan.
And then we intersect and He shows us, and that's what happened to me. So I devised this whole thing. I took a plea. I want to marry this girl. So I take a plea, 10-year prison sentence, $15 million restitution. I had a plane, a helicopter, the whole bit.
I gave them a bunch of money, all my assets, take it. I want this girl. Camille and I get married in July of 85.
I go off to prison in December of 85, and I'll say this in front of her. I'm not the story here. My wife is the story. That girl didn't have a clue. She came from Anaheim. She saw the Godfather once. She didn't know anything, right? That was it.
And she gets, boom, barraged with this. I had eight tough years in prison. Government was really upset with me. They wanted me to cooperate.
I wouldn't do it to the extent that they want me to do it. I just said I'm out of the life. You know, you want to talk to me about what I did?
Let's talk. I don't want to talk about anything else. But they thought they had a big witness in me, so they gave me a hard time. Guys on the street, it became public that I was walking away from that life. Life magazine did a big story. We had a lot of publicity, in a lot of trouble.
My father practically disowned me. Boss of my family, immediate contract on my life. Feds all over me, came into the prison.
Friends, he's sure a dead man anyway. We got word from our informants all over the street. Come to us. We'll put you in a program.
We'll protect you and your family. I didn't want to do that. I wasn't looking to hurt anybody. I just wanted out of the life. They gave me a tough time. I did five years in prison. I get out on parole.
Excuse me. Out on parole, 13 months, the worst 13 months of my life. Big shot mob guy made all this money on the street.
I couldn't get anything going in L.A. I was like a fish out of water. Still had that mob mentality. And yeah, I listened to my wife. I listened to my mother-in-law.
We went to church. It was all good. But I wasn't buying into it at that point.
Didn't have that mentality yet. Right? So, like a fool, after 13 months, and I mean a fool, I fall into a trap. I violate my parole.
I'm walking out of a bank in Brentwood, California. 15 agents slapped the cuffs on me, throw me into the paddy wagon, go into my house with a search warrant, cleaned us out, told my wife, you'll never see your husband a free man again. We're indicting him on a new case. We violated his parole. He's done. Told me the same thing as they brought me down to the lockup in L.A. ready to transport me back to Brooklyn in the morning.
Done. They throw me in that six-by-eight cell, and here's my situation. Defining moment and how. I was always a guy that was in control of my life. I always told my wife, don't worry about it. I got it handled.
Anything. I was out of answers that night. I said, they took all my money? Another racketeering case?
You don't beat these cases with a public defender. I spent millions defending myself. I said, they can't put me out on the yard. I got everybody upset with me.
I'm going to spend the rest of my life in this six-by-eight cell. My wife, 27 years old, we got little babies at home. How's she going to wait for me now? I'm going to lose the girl I did all of this for.
People, I want to tell you something. I used to demean people that were suicidal, weak. How do you not face up to your troubles?
I don't do that anymore. I wasn't suicidal that night. I wasn't that brave. Honestly, I wanted to lay my head on that cot and not wake up. Did you ever get into a situation where it was too painful to even think? I couldn't think of my future. I didn't want to think of where I was. I visited my father 20 years, now I'm in prison.
My family, I don't want any part of it. God, if you're up there, do me a favor and take me. And I really meant it.
I was beat. Long story short, a prison guard, praise that man. I never heard from him or spoke to him.
He pushes a Bible through the slot on the door. Picked up the Bible, threw it against the wall. I didn't want anything to do with that. Then I said, you know what? I got nothing but enemies.
I don't need another enemy. There's only me and God in this cell. I believed in God. And I picked up the Bible. And I said, give me something to make me feel better.
I can't deal with this. And I won't get into all of it, but two verses. Two verses got me. Proverbs 16, 7, right here. When a man's ways are pleasing to the Lord, even his enemies are at peace with him. You think God spoke to me that night? Even his enemies? I had nothing but enemies on both sides of the law.
And you know, there was something. I don't have this special relationship with the Lord. He doesn't speak to me in a dream or speak to me audibly.
I have this relationship now because he speaks to my heart because I have this relationship with Jesus. But that night, it was almost as if the Holy Spirit was standing there and said, hey, yeah, you got a lot of enemies. You didn't do any of this for me. But if you had done it for me, I can take care of your enemies. That's how I interpreted that verse that night. And we know this. Those of you who are into your Bible, you can read a Bible verse 10 times.
It could have 10 different interpreters. Why? Because the Holy Spirit speaks to you through that verse according to your needs at that moment. I believe that. And then I came on. I came to a verse that's become the verse of my life. Proverbs chapter 3, verses 5 and 6. Now, I think it should be the verse of every one of your lives. Now, I don't want to tell you what to do.
But I am a former mob guy. I have a tendency to do that. Trust in the Lord with all your heart.
Lean not on your own understanding. In all of your ways, acknowledge him. And he will make your path straight.
That's the answer, people. Now, I want to tell you this. I want to tell you how God has his design on us all the way through. I was upset with my dad for doing that. I never expressed it to him because I understood my father and I forgave him for it.
But then I thanked him for it later on. Do you know why? Because God used that situation, that defining moment to break the bond that I had with the mob and that I had with my father to break the bond with my earthly father so my heavenly father can bind with me. Because I'll tell you this. If that incident didn't happen, even though I love my wife, I would have never walked away from that life.
Never. Because I respected my dad too much and I was too much into it. So God used that. So ask yourself, even in the worst time of your life, do you think God was still speaking to you?
He was. Sometimes we have to go through difficulties so God can get our attention. And when we get into this relationship with Jesus, we look back and we say, God, now I get it. Now I know why you put this person in my life, why you gave me this great joy, why you allowed me, not caused me. God didn't cause any of that. I did it.
But He allowed it to happen because, remember this, people, with the enemy meant for bad, our God will turn around and use for His glory if we allow Him to. I want to kind of end it with this. You know, when I finally looked at Jesus, I looked at Him a little bit differently when I was in the hole and I was studying Him. You know, my whole life, all my father after told me, you've got to be a man's man. That's the standard in life you have to live up to. Walk down the street, hold your head up high, respect women and children, be a man's man.
Get into the life the same thing. We're men of honor. We're men's men. So when I first looked at Jesus, I want to see what kind of guy He was. So I separated His manhood from His deity and I studied Jesus of Nazareth. Guys, ladies, there was no greater man that ever walked the face of the earth than Jesus of Nazareth. He was the only man's man that ever walked the face of the earth, perfect in every way. His wisdom, His kindness, everything about Him. I went to Jerusalem.
I walked the Via Dolorosa. I saw the three places that Jesus fell when He carried that cross and my first impulse was, how did He get up? He was scourged.
He was, how did He get up? Carrying that wooden cross, splinters in His back, horrible, crown of thorns. There was no greater strength than Jesus. So I looked at it this way.
I said, wow. If I try to emulate Jesus throughout my life, I said, I'm a husband. I'm going to be a better husband to my wife.
And it goes vice versa. You emulate Jesus, His character, right? I'm going to be a better father to my children. If I'm a boss, I'm going to give, I'm going to treat my employees the right way.
If I'm an employee, I'm going to give my boss an honest day's work. Everybody in the community is going to benefit from me emulating the greatest man that ever walked the face of the earth. And in turn, I'm going to benefit throughout my life. And if he's not the Savior of the world, well, what did I have to lose? I'm dead anyway.
But He is the Savior of the world. And because of that, I have all of eternity to gain. People, I want to tell you something. I want to scare you a little bit. It's good to be scared straight.
When I was in the hole for 29 months and 7 days, which is not easy, you know what I developed? A healthy fear of hell. I said, if this is what hell is like, separated from the people I love forever, but a million times worse, I can't escape it.
I don't want any part of it. And it motivated me to get into my Bible even more. And I had my wife send me books on every faith.
I was studying everything. Christianity rang true to me, nothing else. I don't want any part of this. It's good to have a healthy fear of things that are no good for you. I have a healthy fear of drugs because of my family's problem. I have a healthy fear of that. I won't take a drug.
I might like it. Why would I test myself? Don't want it. Never took one.
I won't do it. I have a healthy fear of gambling. I saw so many guys destroy their lives. I have a healthy fear of alcohol to a degree. We don't want to do things that are bad for us. It's good to have a healthy fear.
Well, people, I want to tell you something. Get a healthy fear for hell. Because the bad news is it does exist. The wonderful news is none of us have to go there. None of us.
Because we have a Savior who has forgiven us of our sins and is merciful and graceful and will bring us to heaven. Now, people, I want to ask you something. Do you gamble? Would you gamble with your life for all of eternity? What if you're wrong? You know how many people I've said, guys that say, come on, Michael, this faith thing? What if you're wrong and I'm right? I said, do you want to gamble that? Really?
I don't think so. I want to end it with this. When I walked out of that life in 1995, everybody predicted my death, and I mean everybody. Life magazine, all the prosecutors, they all predicted my death.
You read the inside cover of my book, everybody predicted my death. Big magazine article 50 biggest and most powerful mob bosses. Out of the 50, 30 years later, 48 of them are dead.
Number 49 is doing life in prison, and number 50 is here for one reason and one reason only, to give praise and honor and glory to my Lord and Savior. Because when God, thank you, when God has a plan and a purpose for your life, nothing's going to get in the way. No mob, no gang, no mafia, no addiction, not even death will get in the way of our God fulfilling His purpose in your life except for one thing.
Do you know what that is? That's every one of us. Because God is never an intruder in our life, He's always an invited guest. So right now, people, in all seriousness, this would be all a waste of my time, a waste of all of your time, if it didn't lead up to one thing. One thing. So right now I'm going to make you an offer that nobody should refuse, and I mean that. Because you're at risk if you do. Sorry, Don Quillone. But in all seriousness, if you haven't yet accepted Jesus as your Savior, you are gambling with all of eternity.
How can you afford to do that? We're not guaranteed another moment in this life, not another moment. You know, I just turned 74 years old, I can't tell you the things that I've seen. Here, today, gone, tomorrow. Not another moment. So today I'm going to give you an opportunity to ensure your place in heaven with Jesus. That is an offer that nobody can afford to refuse.
Not anyone. And people, don't take this lightly. Again, this is serious stuff. This is everything. This is what life is all about. It's all about a relationship with Jesus. It's all about accepting Him into our life.
There is no other way. I believe that. The Bible is very clear.
Very, very clear on this. So for those of you that may want to recommit and say to myself, you know what? I've been a good person. Yeah, I love the Lord. Yeah, I've accepted Him. But what have I done with my life? Am I fulfilling His purpose in my life at this moment?
I don't know. Well, we can recommit. And for those of you that have never committed, this is your chance. And let me tell you something. It's real, people.
It's real. Jesus will forgive your sins right now no matter what you've done. He'd forgive this mob guy, bad guy, and He'll do the same for every one of you. So in a minute, I'm going to lead you in the Lord's Prayer, the sinner's prayer, I should say. And I urge you to accept it. I really mean that. Because this will be your defining moment, not only in this life, but for all of eternity.
And that's something you just can't beat, people. So right now, I want you to, right here, close your eyes, bow your head, and repeat after me. Dear Lord, I know that I'm a sinner, but I know that You're a Savior. And Lord, at this moment, right now, I sincerely, with all my heart, ask You to forgive me of my sins. And from this moment on, Lord, I am going to accept You. I'm going to do my very best to know You, to get into this relationship with You, and I know that You will be transforming my heart and my mind.
And You're going to show me the right way. You're going to give me my purpose in life, Lord, and I'm willing to accept that. And today, as I sit here, I pledge my life to You, Lord. I take this very seriously. I am right now ensuring my place in heaven for all of eternity. And I promise from this day forward, Lord, to follow You. Amen.
