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The Grumbler’s Guide to Giving Thanks - Dustin Crowe

Building Relationships / Dr. Gary Chapman
The Truth Network Radio
January 16, 2021 1:00 am

The Grumbler’s Guide to Giving Thanks - Dustin Crowe

Building Relationships / Dr. Gary Chapman

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January 16, 2021 1:00 am

For most of us, grumbling comes a lot easier than gratitude. But this week, you’ll hear about the heart-altering power of thanksgiving in all situations. Author and pastor Dustin Crowe says there are tangible and quantifiable results of living a life of gratitude. Don’t miss the encouragement on the next Building Relationships with Dr. Gary Chapman.

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In the Bible were told that in everything we are to give thanks, how do you do that it actually warms our heart toward him and we are reminded that God is blessing me day after day sometimes in small it sometimes and speak with you think we are made that positive element of taking the steps to tell him thank you because what it does not welcome to Building Relationships Times bestseller, "The 5 Love Languages" has to an author dusting from and be grateful. You and I can reclaim this loss and there are many positive results that come from choosing gratitude to find out more about the days we talked with her featured resources. Five love languages.com is a new book titled 12 lawyers guy giving thanks reclaiming the gifts of the lost spiritual discipline. Again, you can find out more than five love languages.com Gary, I don't think of you as a grumble, or you are to me you're kind of a glass half full person but you had some situations where it was hard to choose gratitude. I would think that right a few of those groups like my first one was from a girlfriend broke up with me when I was in high school and went off the Moody Bible Institute. She sent me a dear John letter and grumbled a grumble with God is a God I love a girl you know I asked God to change her mind. That's a prayer that God did not answer.

You know, yeah, then what O will you and I met my wife and got married. I grumbled about things like the way she loves the dishwasher and the way she did not close doors and drawers and a lot of other stuff. I did my fair share, grumble, and through the years. It knows I'm getting older and less grumbling and affective things are. You don't see as many things as you get older and since Carolyn had cancer eight years ago.

I just thank God every time I say the dishwasher the way she lighted that she still there. You have every time I see the doors open.

I'm just glad she still in the kitchen. You know that that's an interesting dynamic Gary because I think a lot of people in the culture. Look at older people older than them and they think, well, you know, there's the gloomy gossamer grumbling old older person. I think I don't know that that comes naturally. I think you have to work at not being a crappy in your Outlook what you think. Thanks. Think it's a choice you know Linda, as I said, you know sickness and in trauma and those kind of things, put it all in perspective for you and you realize that the things that often you grumbled about are not really all that important in the light of the big picture and so you're far more likely to look for the positive things and be thankful for things yeah I know is that with age so they really has to do with attitude and as Christians, of course, we are all in the process of growing. We hope to become more more more like Christ and the more we say things from his perspective.

I think the more likely we are to be thankful. Well if you're listening today and you feel like maybe I am a grumble or or you have a grumble, or in your life.

I hope you'll pay attention to what Dustin Crow has to say. He's got several things in common with Dr. Chapman there both pastors. They are both graduates of Moody Bible Institute there. Both authors and probably a few more things will find out today. Dustin studied at Trinity Evangelical Divinity school as well.

He serves as the pastor of discipleship at Pennington Park church in fishers Indiana right outside of Indianapolis. Dustin and his wife have a daughter who never grumbles you can find out more about it@ 5lovelanguages.com Baxter credit card Dustin welcome to Building Relationships.

I'm always interested to find out why people choose the topics they write about about you, what was the impetus for this book on gratitude.

Yeah there are a lot of things behind writing a book. A lot of factors that go into that for me a couple of big ones that stood out one of her I needed it. I'm definitely not the optimist glass half-full guy have a grumbling spirit, and I know that and so I wanted the chance to think about it more to practice it to write about it, forces you to practice what you preach or what you write and so when I had done things on Thanksgiving. In the past, I noticed that time period had benefited me and so I wanted that that chance again. So really personal need was the first one I wasn't writing as an expert that someone in the same who had needs one and maybe another big one was. I did a study on Thanksgiving was both for seminary, but also for my local church when I was trying to do was compare what are spiritual disciplines that are not talked about much today in the church culture without books or sermons and it feels like there talked about a lot in the Bible that comparison and to me two things stood out. One was Thanksgiving and the other was confession. Both of those are big disciplines for God's people in the Bible and not talked about as much today and I wanted to figure out why is it going on a kind of lean into that and teach for the church because I didn't see a lot of books on biblical Thanksgiving a lot of books on gratitude. In general, but not a lot to go in depth with what is biblical Thanksgiving. I like that did writing the book helping after my wife right. I do think that, at least for me writing a book on any topic. Always grow in the process because you always realize when you dig into it. You know exactly where you thought you might've been on the topics that that's going to reveal their weakness and keeps it in front of you how important this is. Think about it you get the chance to practice that so deftly does change here and I've appreciated that there's nevertheless that is often the gap between when you write a book and when it comes out. That was true for me. So that asked about a year gap and in that year I noticed grumbling again and so published and I got my copy. I had there.

He read my own book to help my grumbling heart again so I keep fighting but deftly has helped me to keep two things in mind that's great is good to read your own book and insight this is good stuff and listen to it. You have to believe that we can cultivate gratitude if we don't come by it naturally. Are you with a written this book right that's right, Jan, for me, one of the things that I had done in the past for this about four years ago that would take one month and I would do what I call Thanksgiving challenge that every day I would read verses from the Bible on either positively like Thanksgiving or some that hell is not the ground-floor examples of grumbling in the Bible and sighed I'd read about it that also practice and so every day for a month. Write down at least five things that I was thankful for and pray those back to God and part of that is daily habit that practice it does help it get into your bones a little more moves from just a practice you're trying to do actual posture of the heart and letting like most disciplines, the more you do it the more it does become a part of you and so it can be cultivated over time to let the good news.

If you do not natural grateful person.

If you are her grumble her fellow grumble, or you can work against that by developing the habit that's good. I'm hoping that this is a hearing that because I really believe that if you begin to do some of the things you're talking about. The more you practice discipline, the more it becomes a part of who you are and course the spirit of God is also with us when we're moving in his direction right that's right at something. It encourages us to do to help us to: 2020 country experience some unusual challenges to put it mildly. And there a lot to grumble about.

Do you think the grumbling got worse in our culture.

During 2020 oh what are your thoughts after my syndicate were soundly struggling, grumbling every year, but in 2020.

It felt more prevalent in conversations with people inside the church outside the church on social media news where everywhere you're hearing a lot of frustration and complaining and so I do think I got worse and part of that is understandable. It was a hard year. There are a lot of challenges and difficulties and trials, but also think we maybe we got so trapped in the bad news and we were thinking enough about the good news. We were so focused on the problems and difficulties and maybe not enough about what God was doing and the blessings he has provided in who he is in the midst of trials and I think when we get our eyes off of who God is and what he's doing and really stocked on the difficulties of today. That's when grumbling takes over and it did for like 2020 mechanic went down that path. Unfortunately, it was certainly my observation everywhere I turned to bring about not just the virus but how the local officials were handling the virus in my goodness as he said there was a lot to grumble about if you wanted to grumble. Let let's define the term.

We all have some idea come some concept of what we mean by grumbling, but what was your definition of grumbling, grumbling and justice in her complaint or protest.

Usually there is a bad temper behind it. Maybe a picture that helps in early on, Chris, that might daughter never grumbles and unfortunately is not recent. Recently she started doing this thing where when we ask you to do something like at bedtime. I'll say it's time to go to bed and she just grants children both to step out of the heart attitude we give. It's this.

I don't want to do that.

I don't like this throwing up her hands and protest what got Alexa brought into our lives. That's for me what grumbling is maybe to distinguish that lately I've been reading Exodus in numbers which are great books but in numbers you see a lot of grumbling from Israel.

They complain about the manner they complain about Moses. They complain about the wilderness and really, if the heart doesn't trust, but that's different in Exodus 2 talks about them groaning in their grounds are actually crying out to God but they're doing it in a trust for asking for God's help manner.

The both times there trials in Exodus to their cologne comes up to God out of Lord you're the one who can help us versus numbers.

The grumbling is okay got me don't like this and when I can accept and so the different posture of the heart with the things I love about "The 5 Love Languages" .com you take a quiz about your love language. Find out what your spouses love language is with your kids but I wonder if there's a grumbling quotient and looking at this book by Dustin and he has included a short quiz to test for you land on the spectrum from grateful to grumbling. So listen to some of these questions and let's see where you fit. Do you number one do you more often a remember God's blessings in your life or be forget them.

The number two when things don't go your way, do you typically respond a ingratitude or be by grumbling.

Three. Do you see Thanksgiving as an essential spiritual rhythm for Christians a or B something that's great to do when you remember it, but unnecessary. One more would you say you tell God thanks a daily or be less than daily. There are a number of these questions and just stop right there. Dustin, what do these point out to us and help us be a little bit more honest about her so I mentioned that I'm a glass half empty kind of guy, but to be honest and little self confession.

I probably glass half-full when it comes to how I evaluate my own heart.

I tend to think I'm doing better than I am and so these questions are meant to make us feel guilty or beat us up, but they can reveal responses indicate grumbling the kind of like that blinking light in your car to give you a warning I might not be there cars in a blowup but you probably need to change the oil to help questions and certainly will help us where we are and we don't often reflect you stop long enough to reflect on grumble, or expressing gratitude. This word gratitude is it just simply being polite, you know, as a Christian you know we should be thankful. So we think a person if I do something for us is is that is that the heart of it, or is it deeper than that.

I do think a lot of us as Christians that are common approach to growing up I was told by my parents. And this is a good thing to teach your kids but I was told if you're at Christmas or birthday and somebody gives you a gift polite responses to tell them thank you.

Even if I didn't like the gift even if it wasn't an ugly sweater would never wear was a fair amount as a kid, I had to do the polite thing and say thank you grandma and I think sometimes we approach God that yeah we know God is God and he provides for and he blesses and so then we need to do the polite thing.

Mind your manners and tell them think you and I don't think that that's what biblical Thanksgiving as that feels a little bit more like a tax or a bribe. Okay got you do your part. You bless and I'll do my part. All my tax giving you things, but when you read the Bible you don't see that kind of heart attitude when you see people giving things.

It's a from their free will offering in the Old Testament that's with the Thanksgiving offering out of the abundance of their joy and their gratefulness they choose to tell God thank you and maybe if you think in terms of somebody who has ever given you a gift that you really appreciate it if you like. Maybe you could see that they made a sacrifice. You don't have to be told okay need to do the polite thing and tell them thank you. It comes out of the you are thankful to them and I think that's what biblical Thanksgiving. We do a lot of Thanksgiving around holidays and we just celebrated earlier Thanksgiving and Christmas and and during those times we can focus on giving thanks you mentioned that your thinking and the people to give you Christmas gifts and that sort of thing but but you think most of us really understand what the holidays all about in terms of the Thanksgiving and why were giving thanks and for what were giving thanks I don't think that I think we mess for me. Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays but we do limit that one day we see it as a seasonal thing even when I was writing the book and I tell people it's writing about Thanksgiving and the assumption was that product Thanksgiving day or November and I say well enough. Thanksgiving is a much bigger practice.

The Bible than just one day. It's not a day. It's an actual discipline and then it's not only that, but it's more than just blessings. It's not only listing the things I'm thankful for health and family and church and get stuck there, but it's actually being able for the many things God does not life and who he is, even in hard times and I think again, I argue, Thanksgiving is a day and really just the blessings we can name right off the top of her head as opposed to this discipline that were cultivating and good times and in bad times. The book includes the words of the lost spiritual discipline. Explain what you mean by that. Yeah the language of lost again for me. I'd noticed that this isn't something to talk about a whole lot in our church as Melinda great sermons or blocks on me.

Just don't fit as much emphasis on giving things as a regular spiritual discipline.

Again, we think okay of God. This is a clear unmistakable work in our life. If there's a blessing that's just so big. Then we get things and we know that, but feel like those are far and few inserts on a regular part of her life as opposed to saying okay, just like every day. I need to be praying to God and asking for help, just like every day need to be confessing my sin and going to the gospel to get grace and sustenance for today, so also on a daily basis.

I need to give thanks for who he is, in the ways he will take care of me today has good plan for me and that's one reason the language of lost. Not that we don't know we should get things but maybe we don't know how powerful it is and how regular of a practice. It could be think you're right about that. I think we just take it for granted that so many things.

Good things happen to us but were not always even conscious of thanking God as we move along throughout the day you mentioned earlier that many times we think of gratitude we think about thanking God for good health and family members and church and family and so forth. But is gratitude only supposed to be about the good things that come in our lives lives for good thing for the mountaintop and also for the Valley and the very last chapter of my book. I have the title gritty gratitude and that's what I'm trying to cover, there is the reality that it's easy and it's good to start with the blessings and I I'd rather give thanks for the fact that God has kept my car running that on the days or something breaks and I have to take it in either to give thanks for the clear blessing, but even on those hard days.

There are a lot of things that we can give thanks for the Bible tells us in first Thessalonians.

In Ephesians 2. Give thanks in all circumstances. Part of it right. Hate to give thanks and it's really easier.

Give thanks when the blessings are flowing.

Give thanks in all circumstances.

And that's because you know our rejoicing. It's not based on the goodness of today, but it's based upon who our God is based on the fact that he is still good is still faithful. He is still kind and so when we rest and who he is and not just the blessings were reminded that we can be thankful every single day.

I like the distinction you made earlier when you talk about Exodus numbers if they were grumbling about all kind of things that God wasn't doing for them and didn't do them for the and you made a distinction between grumbling and groaning and the groaning laws they were coming out of their paying but they were still reaching out to God, do you know and focusing on him and what he has done and is going to do for them rather than grumbling about what they didn't like that that's a lie like that distinction private biggest conversation about the number one question is what are you telling me are you saying we just have to sweep everything under the rod. Pretend it's not bad. Only think about the positive things and so what I've tried to clarify if we have room in hard days, both to lament and to give thanks and you can actually do both together and I think lament is kind of that groaning and we can do that while we give thanks and David often does that in Psalm 35 we see in verse 17 that David actually asked that the how long, O Lord? To lament and then the very next verse, verse 18. He said I will think you in the great congregation to David. Give us this model of both groaning or lamenting, and it also giving things because we trust that even in these hard things God is still good, faithful, kind, he sees and he knows he's That's that's one of the big things in the midst of difficulty thanking God that you're with me as I walk through this you you say that, therefore aspects are features of biblical Thanksgiving.

Let's talk about those and what they tell us about a biblical perspective on Thanksgiving and I don't talk about forfeiture probably have to be very careful out there. One, let's really dissect Thanksgiving, but every time zoom out and we look at it. I think think intensities for features that help us see the dimensions of biblical Thanksgiving and sometimes you might be missing wanted to at least I know I am the first one is just being thankful and sexy. If you want to give thanks you do have to recognize here's a reason to get things so here is a gift. Or here's a blessing or here's a truth about who God is, is a promise and the word I could just mention a promise that no matter what we go through.

God promises to be with.

So we have to recognize here's something to give thanks for. That's the first step, but in the next one moves us from something to someone.

So were not only thankful but were actually thankful to a person were thankful to God and this is where I think a lot of our cultural discussions of Thanksgiving break down even around the holiday Thanksgiving people talked about. I'm thankful for these things and they give their list, but they don't recognize will thankful for something that has to be a person behind the biblical Thanksgiving moves from stuff to someone that moves from the gifts to the giver and that's the key. Second step is going from thankfulness to thankfulness to God third feature, and I think we might assume that, but if were thankful to God, we execute express. It's called Thanksgiving not thanks feeling and I know for me. Sometimes I might feel thankful I might be glad that I have a blessing in my life and I'm kind of aware of that but he never talked about. I don't pause actually tell God.thank you for this blessing that you have provided in a very specific way this week that you brought encouragement when I needed it because I was weary this week but in the act of expressing it. You start to find joy in it. The protection of pate, and you see it for what it is, so that the third part is actually just telling God.

Thank you. And the fourth for me. This is in the book, the biggest aspect of Thanksgiving. I think sometimes we miss, it's that this whole process of thankfulness to God, should lead to joy in God and so I'm not suggesting a thing that just the giver is more important than the get but I'm trying to say that the gifts actually tell us about the giver and tries me practice giving thanks for specific things again whether that's a blessing or even a truth about who God is, we need in the trial when I give thanks for those things.

I'm reminded who he is.

I see him more clearly. I recognize his hand and so it's actually a revelation of who God is and that's why think in the Bible so often.

Thanksgiving is tied to joy.

Give thanks to God we see again this is who he is and this is what it is like and we find joy through this intimacy and fellowship and worship the four features I talk about doesn't use the term in the book grateful remembrance.

Can you explain what that means in the role that remembering plays in Thanksgiving remembering in the Bible.

Such a powerful word or concept in today when we think of remembering. The only think in terms of recalling the facts and so it's kind of a dry cold thing but in the Bible when it talks about remembering, it's a pretty dynamic concept actually that you're participating again and things that you know are true. One way to think about patted my wife and I only have our anniversary their two different ways to remember. One is simply to recall the facts. If I tell her it's anniversary, happy anniversary and that's the end that's recalling the facts and that's probably not going to go very well for me is another way of actually remembering where causes me to engage in the realities of those valves in a different way and so I say things that are meaningful. I try to do something special we go out on a day not just another night at Chick-fil-A. But maybe we splurge a little bit and so it's remembering in such a way that we reenter into those truths and it actually affects us and changes us with the Bible has in mind when it talks about remembrance when I use language of grateful remembrance, I think that's one way we give things actually looking back and we remember how God has been faithful so he was back to the trials that we walk through and we say God I didn't know how it's going to make it through you did sustain me and you kept me through, and maybe you've even used that in my life. Through this season and so you look back in your next recall that God was good in the past and so now I can trust that God will be good today, and God will be good tomorrow. You see this again throughout the Psalms, David, especially does this a lot where you actually recount the history of Israel. Psalms 105 to 1 of seven are good examples to walk through their history as a reminder that time and time again when they were unfaithful God was kind and merciful and and David does that not just to give thanks but to give thanks but and to have trust and hope in the future because were so often facing trials facing difficulties and so when we look back with thanksgiving actually build more trust and faith in the present that God will continue to be who he was. Remembrance things. She is in the Bible, and often Israel didn't do that, you know, reminded me that sometime ago I sent to my assistant. I'm going to call Thursday. I'm going to go back to my hometown. I'm gonna remember my mom and dad and my sister which is my whole family immediate family and then I did it and I walked about a house that we used to live in talk to the people who live there now and I went to the cemetery and I reflected on my mom and my dad and my sister and all that this just a whole day of remembering and giving thanks to God for all those memories you know that that had of them so yeah certainly identify with that. One thing I can say in the past as a whole Lotta stuff that we can remember and give thanks for you need to meet a lot of people who do not real big on Thanksgiving in there so will you know if I just don't grumble and I don't complain. I just can't take things as they come.

But what I have to say thanks for everything. It's better to not say anything than the grumble. So I guess that's a better place than having an actual grumbling heart of excess complaints but is definitely not the same as being a faithful grateful person and so often from a human illustrations make this clearance again thinking in terms of my life. I think she would receive things different.

If I just say why never actually affirm her never going to tell her thank you, but I'm also not going to complain. Now, we wouldn't have as many fights, but she's not going to feel love appreciated and cherished. But if actually notice what she does. If I notice the things she's doing and I tell her thank you for doing that I noticed you went out of your way and I appreciate that that draws us together so Thanksgiving is it because God needs it when we give thanks actually warms our heart toward him that we are reminded of who he is and we are reminded that God is blessing me day after day sometimes in small ways and sometimes in ways I think we actually need that that positive element of taking the step to tell him thank you because what it does for us, not what it does for him. What are some of the practical business it's giving thanks.

I think one of the best help us fight even anxiety and fear so often for me when I'm struggling with worry, fear, anxiety because I noticed this problem in my life and I see the problem and it grows bigger and bigger and bigger and when I give thanks. It's not that the problem goes away. But it starts to shrink, I just have a different perspective that I get things I'm recalling who God is that he is big and he is strong and he is kind and he is in control and so giving thanks doesn't remove the problems but it changes our perspective on problems, helps us see God is big and some of problems as a little smaller but one of the ways when I'm feeling anxious or I'm worried actually go to Thanksgiving the fight. Another would be discontentment and I know for me again in our social media age. It's so easy to be discontent.

I see other people's stories on Instagram and Facebook and it felt like. And they have so many good things going for them like they're always vacationing the like their kids are just so well behaved and in our heart can only grumble, but we become discontent. Why don't I have more that are why do they have all of these things and then we fight that may choose to get things. It's a reminder. Oh yeah, I do have so many good things and I do have areas where God is providing me and got my not have an actual different plan for me right now and that's okay because he is wise he knows what he's doing and I think it helps us fight discontentment as well.

Supposedly a couple is very practical benefit question again. I want to use because this is the opposites attract, and love languages that one usually usually looks for somebody or find someone who is different than you are. So my question to you is do grumble yours and thankful people attract each other curious how I'm sure that there are number people out there who would tell you what surely happen for us, but I don't know that there's a pattern there, I haven't done any research on that one, but we all know, listen to all of us grumble about something from time to time, but there are people which you talked about earlier and that really it is said it's got another band there just kind of bent to grumble about things. And if you're around them. Whatever's going on around them. They're going to complain about it. You know this is who they are and many times they are married to people that are much more positive which which I think is a blessing for the person for for the grumble, because at least the other person might help them see the sun shining in the midst of their own darkness, so I don't know but anyway where we are ready to be making progress and that's what this book is all about and that's what were talking about. So let's get practical and let's talk a dozen about some of the fun ways that families can help their kids practice of Thanksgiving and learn how to be thankful that Thanksgiving of it can be a fun thing and you can do it together and all of the spiritual disciplines are good but some of them might feel a little bit more individualistic, or even a little dry but Thanksgiving is often a fun thing to do and you can do it easily with other people say you have a family depending on the ages. Some these ideas might work better than others but one thing our family has done is will often do like a Thanksgiving tree. See you can actually get limbs from your yard or you can just find a poster board and any find sheets of paper and you just write every day. Here's one thing I'm thankful for any put it up and taken it cultivates that habit, but it's also nice to see the growth over the course of a month. As you see more and more things written down its reminder of how many blessings you have and you can even read through them again to find encouragement she can do that with a tree that was a poster board you can do that with just a journal on so there are lots of different ways you can do that if you have little kids can even do a gratitude chain and so he done this with our toddler where we write something she's thankful for piece of construction paper and then we turn it into a chain. We link them up and so over the course of a couple weeks. You see the chain of Thanksgiving getting longer and a couple easy things. I think another one would just be to have leverage our time together. So if you do breakfast treat her dinner as a family or even with friends and you can do this with your small group Bible study just out asking that question of what's one thing you're thankful for today and ask everyone to share and I think that's another good we can do is family members or as a small group, or even at the church is just asking others.

What are you seeing God do and what are you thankful for. And then we get the chance to be encouraged by one another closer couple small things like those ideas and once things are sometimes suggested to families is especially if they're completely complaining the kids are complaining about things when they're going to go to your room and like a list of five things in your room that you're thankful for. You can include debated in the chair and whatever's in the room five things you're thankful for in your room, you're starting out with things you know but it does continue to build the concept that is all of things to be thankful for. So yeah, I think these are practical ideas that help families trust version actually recommended in the practice of praying he did a similar thing. Say whatever room I'm in the letter to his office for the outside walk around for five minutes and just pray kind of everything you see, get things and also let it dry whose memories for curing in family room, the dinner table is a reminder of meals we've had.

Got provision in the Neil family members. We love people that have been in our house that we cared for such a similar idea of walking around and just praying right next to my medical each other because I asked you this is grumble is in thankful people attract each other.

I want you to go to that a similar question and that is if I am married to a grumble or or if if a thankful person is married to me and I grumble. Can a spouse change a grumble her into a thankful person because you said on this program. Time and time again you can't change your spouse.

You can't change another person. So what you do that on your Destin answer this to you first. What you do with the grumbling spouse. Well, I think one thing you can do and try to in trying to be a positive influence is not not preach to them not hit them over the head with.

Grumbling apart in the fish grumbling, but to smile and maybe even laugh and say you know you really good when you grumble your grammar. Now tell me one thing that you're thankful for you know just the fact that you laughed you united a five humorous thing and then you you asked them to give you one thing there thankful for it. Just got up its answer to me. It's kind of a humorous way, breaks the ice is not preaching to them it's it's have a little fun but is also reminded them what their something to be thankful for.

Here how I would you answer that Destin I think it helps to not try to kill people and the gratitude that woo them like you mentioned. So I think you know whether it is grumbling or gratitude. It does seem like it spreads and so I think if you take on the posture of them to continually give thanks. Whether my spouse does better not.

Hopefully over time, though. Notice that and that we convolute into that insane men when they get things I noticed joy in them I noticed they have a different perspective on God. But like you mentioned sometimes that might include asking the question of what is one thing you're thankful for what's one thing you see God doing in our life right now. What's one thing is on the word this week. Any of those questions that prompt the praise which changes the heart attitude very quickly. Interesting Gary you hit on an irony in that is that the person who is a thankful person and listening to grumbling can grumble about the grumble and so Yuri what you're saying is you flip that around and you is the thankful person you be thankful for the grumble are in your life and move into that person's life with them and maybe even you say that you know I'm I'm thankful that you're able to see all of these things that I that I haven't seen that are wrong that were sold, and so in a sense, you woo them by showing them how grateful that you are that they are in your life think you are by nature, we do exactly what you said Chris.

That is what we grumble about their grumbling because we tired of hearing all the negativity, but that didn't help that they're just a disgrace or chasm between the two, but if you can keep it light, but say something about the positive part of their grumbling and then turn it to Thanksgiving. Seems to me that would be a really positive thing that limit good example for me of Paul when he writes a letter to the church's imperfect churches. They often have a lot of problems, there's conflict is false teaching. But what always amazes me is Paul and you see this Colossians is a great example when he starts his letter. He said I I think God when I think of you so rather than grumbling and thing and I think about this church. I think about half of the problems in the frustrations and what I'm have to put in this letter he doesn't go there immediately.

He immediately go to. I think God when I think of you and hope all models. I noticed Scott's good work of creating faith, hope and love, and thought that the church is perfect because it focuses first on the reasons to give thanks, rather than the reasons to grumble. That's that's pretty powerful. You mentioned earlier, the concept of journaling listing.

Maybe some things in a journal. Anything that you like to say about that.

For me it's probably the easiest place to begin.

And if you want to grow on Thanksgiving. If you see okay I don't have be as much of a grumble as I am. I see that Thanksgiving is an important spiritual discipline. I wanted change, even if just a little.

I think the easiest place to start is with the journal and I can be a physical journal that can be the notes app on your phone something on the computer. Whatever it is it's finding someplace run a regular basis, Hank Daly is great but if it's not daily, it's every couple days to start writing down the things you're thankful for, and then again it creates this habit where throughout the day. Then on the lookout because he know eventually either tonight or tomorrow I'm going to write down five things until you're more aware of what is God doing around me today and what promises my scene lived out. What I notice when I do read the word. When I talk to people and I think that habit of every day trying to write down five things it helps you see God at work because we tend to just go through our day.

Our eyes are closed. Think about the neck pain and there might be a lot of blessings that were missing. I found that certainly helped limo lines periodically and then that for like a month five things a day, and yet it is just amazing how the things come to mind when you remain the focus on it so there's an appendix to your book that's called the gratitude challenge tell us about that gratitude challenge and does a little bit of what I just mentioned it's creating that habit starts 30 days and every day there is something to read from the Bible, specifically on Thanksgiving or grumbling, and the part of the goal to see what is the Bible say about this. I want to know how are people in the Bible, giving things what is that look like what her reasons for giving things and so the first part is just studying and learning about Thanksgiving from the Bible and in the second aspect is the practice. Okay I see of him doing it now. I wanted to answer every day it's kind of that commitment to I'm going to write down the reasons get things also pray back to God.

And that's a key feature of not only finding the list but telling God think you and such drawing the two of us together because I'm telling him thank you for these specific things that came out of my own experience a few years ago when I first started to think about Thanksgiving and practice it and again it was so helpful for me. I want to make sure I included that in the book Dustin.

You mentioned Paul, and I was just thinking about Paul and Silas still had no reason to be singing in that jail and hear their voices, you know, they prayed and prayed and Thanksgiving was a part of that.

At night I keep coming back to that there is something about the example of biblical people who are in really dire straits who are praising God, thanking God in the middle of the storm that therein, there's a lot in there that we can learn right reminder and I think that's because, as believers, no matter how hard it is there some rocksolid truths and realities that never change, and if we know that my sin is forgiven.

If we know that we've been adopted as a son or daughter to God's family that we have new life that our eternity is sure and it is with God and that he has good plans for me today and tomorrow and forever.

The no matter what is going on. We have more than enough reasons to get things set our listeners here will be getting into a new year and this might be a good time for all of us to take an attitude check in this book will help you do it and so let me encourage their listeners to make the most of this book because I do think the next year could be a whole lot better than the last year. If we begin to focus more on Thanksgiving and gratitude rather than the things that we been grumbling about overcapacity or who knows what this year's going to be like God, not us.

But God is going to be with us and there's always things for which we can give thanks even in the worst of circumstances. Dustin, thanks for being with us today and thanks for taking time to put these thoughts together because I think it's going to be up to a lot of people and very very helpful to have me on and perhaps the conversation went to thankful for the conversation with Dustin Crow today what might a good dose of gratitude doing your life and mine right now. For more help our featured resources. Dustin spoke to grumble her's guide to giving thanks, Rick gifts of a lost spiritual discipline.

Five love languages.com five love languages.com and next week if the topic of sharing your faith makes you nervous anxiety.

Ms. Heather and Ashley Holloman's advice on how to live sin is coming up in one before Miguel, let me think I've connection in Janice time Building Relationships with Dr. Gary Chapman's production of many radio Chicago ministry. Thanks for listening


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