NFL Teams Described In 1 Word (Hour 4)

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Rocket can. What a sloppy game this has been. So Josh Allen threw a pick, but it was Isaiah McKenzie's fault. Then the Bills got the ball back. James Cook fumbled the football. Is that elbow an issue? Cause that ball wasn't even close to the tight end. It was so off target and it was incomplete.

Now I just saw a DA tweeted this. And this is what Mike Torrico said in the broadcast. And hot take hickey, you're not going to like this. Because you would agree you're one of the biggest supporters. Oh that was a horrible pick. As the Bills are up 7-0. You would agree you're one of the biggest supporters of Matthew Stafford on national radio. I love Matthew Stafford. Here's what Mike Torrico said about your boy. He's always going to give the other guys one or two a game.

And Damon Amendelor tweeted the great Mike Torrico just nailed the Matthew Stafford experience. Your thoughts on that? I don't think he's wrong. Yeah, I mean he led the league in interceptions last year.

It's 17. It's not wrong whatsoever. I just thought you weren't going to like the quote.

No, I think he's right. Because you're the biggest Matthew Stafford hunk I've ever witnessed. He won a Super Bowl while also leading the league in picks. Go figure. He did. It's very rare that that happens, but he did.

There's no doubt about that. And that Super Bowl run is crazy. The Cardinals sucked in that first game. Then they were blowing out Tampa. Tampa comes on back. And then he delivered that great throw to Cooper Cup where the Buccaneers defense just did a horrible job.

Miscommunication. NFC title game. It looked like they were choking and not showing up for the moment. Then they had that fourth quarter comeback in the Super Bowl. They're pretty much sleepwalking on offense the first three quarters and then boom. They woke up in the fourth quarter. That was really a wild run. There were so many times that run should have ended and it just didn't.

And you got to give credit to Donald and Stafford and Cup. They just showed up and made the big plays when needed to. So Bill's up 7-0. Early stages of the second quarter as I got to think Buffalo goes down the field here and goes and gets a touchdown when there's been this many turnovers in the game.

It just seems like we're due for a score. And Josh Allen, it seems like every time I look up, he's going to Gabe Davis. Gabe Davis is going to have a monster year. I said this when we were previewing the bill, still have at least 10 touchdowns.

He already has one tonight. That dude's going to be such a good player. And I remember interviewing him when he was at UCF when he was getting ready for the draft on CBS Sports Radio. And I said, who's the best wide receiver of the draft? And he said himself. And one thing when you expect to be a first round pick and you say that when you're projecting the fourth or fifth round, that was pretty telling.

And the dude was one of the stars of that playoff game last year with his four touchdowns. Okay, give me some NFL music here. Hot Take, Hickey. I'll give you a word about every NFL team for this upcoming season. We start with the Buffalo Bills.

My word, favorite. They're the favorite. Everyone's picking them to go win the Super Bowl this year besides me and you. If they don't win the Super Bowl, then their season's a disappointment.

The New England Patriots. My word for them, sloppy. I think their approach on the offensive side of the ball this year is sloppy. And it's not really because of Mac Jones. I don't get how they're going to be calling the plays here. A little bill, a little judge, a little Matt Patricia. Where is the offensive experience in the coaching circles?

That's a problem for me on the offensive side of the ball. I think it's sloppy. Dolphins. My word for them, I doubt.

Just going to use the word doubt. That's the word for the Miami Dolphins because I do doubt them this year. I do not look at this Dolphins team as this great team. They have a good roster.

When you look at Tyreek Hill, Jalen Waddle, Armstead on that offensive line, I like the defense. But with that being said, I just doubt and I don't trust their head coach and their quarterback. Jets.

The word I use for them, injury. They start off the year with an injury to their quarterback, Zach Wilson, out for the first three games of the season. Their schedule is very tough in the first 10, 11 games. I just hope this is not going to be the year when the injury bug just continues to bite them and you know what, and it's already starting with their quarterback.

Steelers. The word I'm using for them, scared. They're scared to start Kenny Pickett right now. They should start Kenny Pickett right now.

Instead, they're going with Mitch Trubusky. Ravens. The word I'll use for them, health. It was their biggest opponent last year. They could not stay healthy. They were rolling even with some of the injuries, then too many happened and they were the outside looking income playoff time. They got to be healthy. Browns.

The word I use for them, suspension. The suspension of Deshaun Watson is going to end their season before he even gets to be on the field and playing games and that return up against the Texans because I don't trust Jacoby Brissett to weather the storm in the first 11 games. Bengals.

I'll use the word protection. They have not protected Joe Burr the last two years. Year number one, tore up his leg. Year number two, they almost won the Super Bowl. Now, you have Karas, Kappa, and Collins joining that offensive line.

They got to step up. It's an improved offensive line. The protection of the quarterback is the biggest key. Colts. What do you think my word is for the Colts? Ha, take kick if you had to take a guess. You being the Colts aficionado, you having a very successful and popular Colts podcast.

Huh. What do you think my word is for the Colts? Back. As in the Colts are back. Back to winning the division, back in the playoffs, back to having some sort of quarterback stability. I'm sorry.

Back would not be the word that I would use unless if you're a sucker. And you're a sucker. Now, I think the Colts are making the playoffs, but you fall into this trap of just being fine with being good. I want you to challenge your team to be great and the Colts won't be great this year.

I would agree. They're not a great team this year. They're back in the playoffs. Back in the playoffs, back winning the AFC South. Nah, you made it seem like all the Colts are back. No. The three years I laid out for you.

Me and my podcast partner, George, we're going to be dancing and having fun. Back in the playoffs, back winning the division, back having some sort of quarterback competence. That's all. I'm not saying they're back to being the peak Colts team or this is their best of franchise ever been.

Here's my word. Turnovers. That's going to be the biggest difference. This year, Matt Ryan will do a better job protecting the football, interceptions, fumbles, especially in the big spot than Carson Wentz did a year ago. For the Tennessee Titans, urgency. I don't think they have urgency.

I think they're a team that's just fine with being good, which is bizarre because their coach once said he would cut off his Johnson to win a Super Bowl. Trading AJ Brown doesn't show me urgency. Having Ryan Tanel as your quarterback doesn't show me urgency.

Stupid. Tennessee's taking a step back this year. Jaguars, the word I'll use for them, professional. This is the start of the Trevor Lawrence era. Last year, you hired a bozo as an NFL head coach.

Thanks for the word, Trey Lance. Now we know Urban Meyer is a very successful college coach, but the dude was a jackass in the NFL. Now you have a professional coach in Doug Peterson. Texans.

My word, makeover. Yes, you had Nick Cassaro there for a few years. You bring in a new coach, Lovey Smith.

He's not your long term answer. But now you're finally away from the Deshaun Watson era where you know he's been traded. You get the picks back. You made some nice draft picks this year. You're building. This is really the start. These next two years, we're going to learn if they're going to get the right players to have this team have a makeover from three years from now. Next up, Chargers. I'm using the word cherry.

Here's why. The Chargers are a great Sunday. They have everything that you want in a Sunday. And now they just need to take that final step and put the cherry on top of the Sunday. And this year for the Chargers, it's all about putting that cherry on top of the Sunday, not being the same old Chargers getting to the postseason.

I don't think they're going to be a wild card team. I think they're winning the AFC West, but I use that word cherry because I think of a Sunday. They have all the pieces.

Herbert, Eckler, Keenan Allen, Mike Williams, J.C. Jackson, Joey Bosa, Derwin James. They have all the pieces to be a great Sunday. And you just got to put that cherry on top of the Sunday. Chiefs. Motivation. Last few years, everyone's been slobbering over the Chiefs. Now some people are doubting them.

And sometimes a champion just needs a little extra motivation and the F.U. toward those happen. Raiders. The word I use for them, explosive. I look at that offense. Carr, Adams, Renfro, Waller, Jacobs.

They got a lot of explosive pieces. Broncos. My word for them, punt. I'm going to punt on the Broncos making the playoffs until next year. I still think the Denver Broncos are a year away. So those are all the teams in the AFC. When we get to the NFC, one word for each team. Giants. Rebuild.

Yeah, here you go again. Gettleman out. Thank God.

Judge out. Thank God. Now you're bringing in an era that has some symmetry in this regime.

Dabel and Shane working together. This is the start of what I think is a three year rebuilding plan. And you don't even know who the quarterback is going to be long term because it will not be Daniel Jones. Eagles.

The word I use, fourth. Because this team could be the fourth best team in the NFC. Rams, Bucks, Packers and whatever order you want. Those are the three best teams.

The Eagles should win this division and they have the potential to be the fourth best team in the NFC. Cowboys. Drama.

Do I need to say any more? They're the Drama Dallas Chokin Cowboys. And before this season even started, one plus one equals three. There's speculation about Mike McCarthy. Jerry Jones is saying the offense is going to be all through Ezekiel Elliott. Like, huh?

It's a lot of drama for the Cowboys. Commanders. My word. Waste.

You have talent. This will be a wasted season. I'm sure you have the sewage pipes be bursting at FedEx Field because that stadium is a dump. But your quarterback, starting Carson Wentz in the year of 2022, is just a waste. Packers.

The word I use for them. Quarterback. They have one. They have a back to back MVP in Aaron Rodgers. Oh, what's going to happen with Devante Adams?

Oh, how will the Zords hurt? I don't care who lines up a wide receiver. You're paying your quarterback $50 million a year.

He'll figure it out. Vikings. Coaching.

Bringing in a new coach is going to help that team, especially bringing in a coach that's on the offensive side of the ball. I think the Vikings make the playoffs this year. They'll be nine and eight. Lions. Gritty. I don't think it's gonna be a good team, but I think they'll be like a gritty football team. They'll be a tough football team that will be looking to bite your kneecaps off each and every week. Bears.

This one's easy. Disaster. I feel bad for Justin Fields. This organization, this team, they stink and they're going to ruin their young quarterback. Bucks. Brady.

Do I need to say any more? Saints. The word I use is missing. Because they'll be missing Sean Payton this year for anyone that's believing that Dennis Allen is going to win this division for them, please. Panthers.

Comeback. In order for this team to go where they want to go this year, they have to have two Comeback Player of the Year candidates. Christian McCaffrey and Baker Mayfield.

I think Run-CMC is more likely to win the award than Baker, but both need to be in the conversation. Falcons. Draft.

Like, get me to the NFL draft. They got some talent on defense. I like AJ Terrell. On offense, you got Kyle Pitts. We'll see where Calvin Ridley will be playing football next year. Quarterback-wise, I'm not believing Marcus Mariota. You'll eventually get Desmond Ritter. And if he doesn't show you enough, then you'll be drafted a quarterback next year. Rams.

Repeat. That's what this season's all about. They're down 10-0. Bass made the field goal. Now the Rams are lining up at a fourth and two. Five minutes to go in the second quarter. They're at the 28-yard line. Let's see if they're going to get this fourth and two. They're actually running the play. They go to Cup. Uh-oh. Oh, that's close.

Cooper Cup is unbelievable. He was two yards short of the play. He must have got hit two or three different times.

And that guy still found a way to move those chains. First down for the Rams. But the word for the Rams.

Repeat. That's what this season's about. Cardinals.

Survival. As in, you need to survive the first six games of the season without DeAndre Hopkins and not basically put your season right down the drain. 49ers. Potential. They have some potential this year. They have a great roster. But it's all about the quarterback. You know what potential means. You haven't done it yet. I got to see the quarterback really thrive this year if this team wants to get to the playoffs.

And finally, Hickey. I think you'll appreciate this last one. The Seahawks. I think that's the team you are most actively rooting to be the biggest dumpster fire this year. Would that be a fair statement in the NFL?

No, it would not. Really? You can't stand Pete Carroll. I don't like Pete Carroll, but I already know they're going to be bad, so I don't have to really actively root for it. So give me the three teams that you're hating the most in the NFL this year that you just want to see crash and burn.

I know one of them. Patriots. Cardinals. By the way, before I give you my Seahawks word.

Sure. Now, you know me. I'm a company guy. Odyssey and CBS. Big company guy.

Got to be fair, though. CBS Sports put out a hot seat list today. OK. I think it was like top five or six coaches on the hot seat. OK. Cliff Kingsbury's on the hot seat. According to CBS Sports now. Correct me if I'm right or wrong here. He just got a multi-year extension through twenty twenty seven, I believe.

Yeah, it was either twenty twenty six or twenty twenty seven. He's going. Well, it's a fat buyout if he gets fired this year. He's not on the hot seat this year. Is it one of those things where it's like you got to get to five and now you're reaching. I could give you the entire list.

There's really not like if you think about it. We just had 10 head coaching changes going into this year. There's still so many first and second year coaches where there's not, I think, a lot of guys in the hot seat or not as many as you would think. Yeah, but Cliff can't be on that list. I would agree.

He just can't. Now, I'll find the list during the break and I will like hot seat meeting like fired at the end of the year. Right.

Like not just like. Oh, OK. Yeah. Just I'm just confirming potential to be fired by the end of the year.

So he's not in the hot seat. But here's my word for the Seahawks. Crap.

You could use that word in many way. You have a crappy football team. Oh, crap. We don't have Russell Wilson anymore.

Crap. Gino Smith is that quarterback crap. Drew Locke is that quarterback. A lot of crap with that football team.

So that is one word for every NFL team. For this upcoming season. Zach Gelb Show CBS Sports Radio. You're listening to the Zach Gelb Show. It is Zach Gelb Show on CBS Sports Radio.

That was the voice of Leroy Hoard, who always loves to trash Ryan. 10-7. Bills up on top as we are in the final minutes here of the first half. Josh Allen 16 of 18 tonight for one hundred and forty three yards and have a passing touchdown to Gabe Davis. And then also in this game, a few moments ago, big fourth down conversion. Stafford really Cooper Cup getting the first down. And then what a touchdown catch. Cooper Cup got four feet down and I looked up like, did he get it? Did he get the feet down?

And they show the replay. He got four feet down. That dude. He may be one of the toughest matchups in the NFL.

I just don't know how to stop him. So he scores 10-7 at the 235 mark here. In the first half.

And we'll see if Buffalo can get on the board one more time. OK, so I found this list. It was actually authored by our pal Jeff Kerr.

And I have one problem with this list. Coaching hot seat. I saw this on Twitter.

I had no clue who wrote the article. It was just a graphic coaching hot seat. And I saw Cliff Kingsbury was on the coaching hot seat. And I go, there's pressure on Cliff Kingsbury, but the guy just got a contract extension. The general manager just got a contract extension.

And oh, yeah, your quarterback just got a contract extension. That doesn't come off to me, Ryan, as a guy that's in danger of losing his job. Now, that does not mean there's not pressure on him. It's embarrassing if they don't make the playoffs.

I don't care if Hopkins is out for the first six games because he was using performance enhancing drugs or not. But there's pressure. But I don't think there's pressure where he's going to lose his job if the Cardinals miss the playoffs this year. Right. There's not a Steve Wilkes situation where he was a one and done.

The guy just got a fat extension. You're right. A lot of pressure. Pressure is a lot different than actually being on the hot seat and being in danger of losing your job. OK, so here's the list from Jeff Kerr.

They keep the eye on candidate. I think this one's fascinating. Pete Carroll. Now, if I had to place a wager, Pete Carroll's back if he wants to with the Seattle Seahawks next year.

If he wants to. I do believe the Seahawks, though, are going to be a disaster this year. And it's a bad look when you force Russell Wilson out of town. And now your plan is the combination of Geno Smith and Drew Locke until you draft the quarterback next year. Now, with that ownership situation and the eventual sale happening, but according to Jody Allen being nowhere close. I would think Schneider and then also Pete Cowell are going to be back next year.

But it is a fascinating topic of conversation that Jeff did provide to us, especially to you. Look, we'd assume they'll have a top five ish pick at the best really top five pick. You know, and so if you're going to get a new quarterback, like you just said, you ushered out Russell Wilson last year. Maybe it's time to kind of usher in a new era in Seahawks football. It would be a good time to kind of move on from Pete, new head coach, new quarterback and kind of reset the team.

You know what's funny here? We keep on saying, like Seahawks, what, four or five win team? Yes. Let's go win loss here. OK, now keep keep track of the record here. Sure.

So I'm going to have you in charge of the math because I stink at math. They play the Broncos on Monday Night Football to start off the year. Los San Francisco week two. That's an L Atlanta week three. I'll give them a win.

Homer way game is in Seattle. I'll get more. I don't care about what you're giving them.

Just keep track of my record here. Lions. They'll split those games. Falcons and Lions. They will lose the Lions. Saints week five in New Orleans loss. Cardinals week six Murray will outscore him loss. Chargers week seven.

Loss. Giants week eight. That game is in Seattle. Then the Giants beat the Seahawks a few years ago. Colt McCoy, a quarterback with Russell Wilson playing in Seattle.

You know what? I'll give the Seahawks a win on that one. Week nine at the Cardinals.

I think that's a loss. Week 10. Tampa loss by week.

Unless if you're the Raiders, you usually can't lose the bye week, so they'll be good there. Week 12. Raiders loss. Week 13. Rams loss. Panthers week 14.

I'll trust Baker because Baker wanted to go there, I think. So that's a revenge game for Baker loss. San Francisco week 15. Short week. You're at home late in the year.

San Francisco usually gets better late in the year. Loss. At Kansas City loss. I'll give them a win up against the Jets week 17. And the Rams final week of the season. The only way they win that game is if it means nothing to Matthew Stafford.

But I'll give them a loss. How many wins did I give them? Four, I think? Three. Three.

Three and 14. Yeah, if I'm Pete Carroll, I only get three wins. New quarterback, new head coach. Well, I think Pete Carroll, if he wants to, would still be back.

I do. I don't think they're going to get rid of him unless if he does not want to be back as the head coach. Now, going through this Jeff Curless, coaches on the hot seat, as Josh Allen, I think just threw a pick. He just got picked off with 152 remaining. Now, the first one was not his fault. That was to Isaiah McKenzie. It popped off his hands and went into the hands of a Rams player. Let's see if this one was his fault when they give us the replay right now, as you're going to have Collinsworth making this longer than it needs to be using the telestrator, which, by the way, we know Vernon Lundquist loves when Tiki uses that. That wasn't a great throw. Oh, yeah. Nice job by Hill.

Just stepped right in front of it. OK, Jeff Kerr, hot seat list. Ron Rivera. Is Rivera on the hot seat? The reason why I say no, like if you have to compile a list, sure, you could put him on this list, but I don't think he'll actually get fired. Even though it's so tough to predict Dan Snyder, there's a lot of other garbage with that organization and everyone likes Ron Rivera. If Daniel Snyder is smart, he would keep Ron Rivera. And we know the guy's a good football coach, but just from a public relations standpoint, you basically make him deal with all the crap that you put on people in this organization. He's one of the few bright spots.

So I'm with you. Frank Reich. And at number four on the hot seat, if they don't make the playoffs.

I would then say that snip snip. Jim Erce is going to be on that private jet firing his coach and then just releasing crazy videos. You can't miss the playoffs two years in a row when you've made aggressive moves like this. The last two offseasons bringing in Carson Wentz and Matt Ryan.

Your boy on the hot seat. If they miss the playoffs, I probably agree. Assuming injuries are not the reason to derail the season. We talked about Cliff Kingsbury. There's pressure on him, but he just got an enormous extension. I don't think he's on the hot seat. Matt Rule. He's got to prove something this year.

There's no doubt about that. And hot take Kiki. Predict Matt Rule, not me. Hot take Kiki predicted Matt Rule to be coach of the year this year. He's in on the Panthers making the playoffs.

And then number one, Mike McCarthy. Well, Mike McCarthy be coach of the Cowboys next year there, Ryan? No. Marco, will Mike McCarthy be the head coach of the Cowboys next year? Yeah.

You think so? I don't know if Jerry Jones is going to pull the trigger. He's so late with all this stuff. He was so late with Jason Garrett. And if the Cowboys sneak in as a wild card, which I can see in a very poor NFC. Yeah, I can see him giving him another chance and doing the same garbage of I have other choices. It's not sad, but McCarthy is still here for that. Yeah, because if Sean Payton is not ready to come back next year, which I could see him taking another year. Yeah, I think he stays just because Jerry Jones is slow to pull the trigger. If Sean wants the job, then I'll get rid of Mike McCarthy. Different story, but I think Sean Payton has to go to Jerry Jones. I think Jerry Jones. I mean, he's going to feel the water.

Don't get me wrong, but I don't think Jerry Jones. I'll generally call him every day. Right, but I don't think it's going to be one of those things where he calls him and he offers him the moon. And then Sean Payton says, yes, I think he's just gauging his temperature.

When you're ready, you let me know and the job is yours. I don't think McCarthy is going to be back next year because now I'll give you a thought in a different way off Marco's thinking in just a second. Because I could talk myself into you, even though I've been adamant that he's not going to be back. But the reason why I say he's not going to be back is Jerry is such a wild card. And even when that team is not supposed to be great, he'll say they're going to be great. And he has been hyping up this team this offseason. If you even if you may, and I think they'll make the playoffs this year, but are you going to be able to take them to the next step?

And last year, that embarrassing loss of wild card weekend. I really do believe unless you have McCarthy in NFC Championship game this year, he's going to be begging Sean to come back. But to your point, did you hear this audio clip the other day of Jerry Jones saying one plus one? Yeah, he's losing his mind. He's starting to I mean, look, we joke about it.

I hope that's not the case. But like some of the stuff that he's spewing out there just doesn't even make sense. Well, a few years ago, the thing that ultimately does not make sense was he was talking to the Dak Prescott contract. He's like, when you're in the forest and you cut your hand, you've got to use your your bachelor's degree.

The tools that you learn there are more important than your master's degree. And I've learned it all. I'm like, what the bleep is this guy saying?

Like, there's so much stuff. That's why it makes it hard to try to decide. Look, if you're asking me, should McCarthy be back if they're a wild card and one and done? No, of course he shouldn't. But I don't know what Jerry Jones is going to do, because it feels like go back in time, like every coach he had minus for some silly reason, Jimmy Johnson. We still won't put him in the Ring of Honor. But he had the longest leash for everybody else.

Jimmy Johnson. No, no, no. You know, you win two out of three.

No, you got to go. Everybody else he stuck with for so long. So to speak this in, because I look at it more the other way. This guy is only getting older, hasn't been to a Super Bowl since 1995, eventually got to cut the fat. But a lot of these older owners have patience. Like Arthur Blank kept Dan Quinn around for the longest time.

He should have fired him two years before he actually fired him. But when I hear the one plus one equals three quote, that's kind of Jerry for the first time in this entire offseason admitting. Yeah, I got to say, my team is great even when I know they're not great. And I'm going to tell you one plus one equals three, even though when everyone else looks at them, they go, yeah, this team isn't great, but I'm going to say that they're great because I have to hype them up.

I have to be the point guy in that organization. I guess. But is that really to to put pressure on McCarthy or is it just to sell the team? Because Jerry, all he's about is making money and the Cowboys make money. But what I'm saying to you is if that was him in a weird way, admitting that this team wasn't that great, maybe he'll be more lenient with Mike McCarthy. Could be.

Could be. And again, he's also he's shown, again, patience to the point of you could say, well, Garrett was a different story because he loved him personally so much. Stay with Barry Switzer quite a long time.

Stay with Chan, Gailey for way too long. Like there's so many guys that have been through there, even when they were going through coaches, that they stayed longer than they should have. Jerry Jones has been a guy who stayed with his coach even when the situation is screaming to change longer than he should have.

So I wonder if it really is that important to him or it's just, hey, business as usual. We make money. We're still the Cowboys. Go to the playoffs are OK. What's the difference?

It is that Gelb show on CBS Sports Radio. I hate betting unders because then you're just rooting for no scores. But if there's ever a week to bet unders, it's always week one because it seems like the football is always sloppy, especially with how little preseason these guys get. Who would have ever thought, though, this game would potentially be 10-7 at halftime.

There's 26 seconds left. Rams are on the move. But this is a low scoring game. I thought between these two teams, we know the defenses are really good, that there would be fireworks.

There'd be a lot of touchdowns. And so far, we only had two touchdowns in the first half. And the Rams are actually faced now with the second and 19 with 26 seconds to go as they are on Bill's side of the field at about the 38 yard line. So we'll see if the Rams could tie up this game or maybe go take the lead. Come on back with the closing bell.

We'll tell you whose stock is booming, whose stock is dooming. You're listening to the Zach Gelb show. We have reached halftime. How about that field goal by the Rams to end out the half? Matt Gay made a 57 yard field goal. Hickey, that thing would have been good for maybe 65 yards out, if not more. I think 68 they said it like, you know, like they project on NBC.

I think it's at 68. We need a nickname for him. They used to have Greg the leg. Matt Gay needs a new nickname now. Yeah, I don't know what to go on with a nickname for that. Usually I have something quick off the top of my head, but I got nothing for Matt Gay when it comes to a nickname for him. But Greg the leg usually is a good one. I guess it's tough to really, especially as a kicker. Make it Matt!

That's basically all you got when you think of words you can line up with an M or a G. OK, so at the half it is 10 10. Josh Allen, 17 to 20, 153 yards, a touchdown, two interceptions. James Cook, he got a carry. He also has a fumble. And Matthew Stafford has also thrown in a reception as well.

What a sloppy game this has been so far between these two teams. Aaron Donald, let's get to Dr. Teals himself. He has one sack in this game. Bobby Wagner in his Rams debut, six total tackles and a sack. And Matt Milano, who actually is from Comac, New York, from my hometown. He has five tackles from the Buffalo Bills.

Yeah. Did he move? I think I've never heard Matt Milano on Long Island ever. I don't think he played his his high school ball at Comac High School because he's my age. But he was born in Comac, New York, and he played his college ball for Mr. Be A Dude. Gotta be dudes being dudes. Mr. Steve Adazio. It was like one of the biggest jackasses.

You know what's weird? Great video, but otherwise. Gave BC nothing. I was the only person in the Temple Beat that had a good relationship with him.

Reporters that have been doing this for years would say. How do you have a guy was only covered him for one year. How do you have a good relationship with him? Now, the guy was a jerk and he's very disingenuous, but for some reason he liked me. But maybe thought you were a jerk. Jerks attracted to jerks.

Now you're being a jerk. Yeah, I'm trying to see where he played his high school ball. Does not say. But yeah, he's from Comac, New York. How about that? Very nice. Long Island together. Well, I don't know. Come on. A few weeks ago, you tried to talk down upon me because I'm not from your hometown.

So you're a little fraudulent now by saying Long Islander stick together. Now, can you speak for a second so I can figure out what high school this kid went to? Sure. Yeah. Mamelano.

Interesting. It's actually a big deal because Long Island football sucks. You're a former Long Island football player. I'm a former Long Island football player.

The biggest deal is like when kids like go to like Syracuse and Syracuse football stinks. Now, not to make this a longer conversation than it needs to, but it's said that he went to Dr. Phillips High School. That's not Dr. Teals High School. That's Dr. Phillips High School. It's located in Florida.

It's like a big powerhouse, I'm pretty sure. So maybe he moved. Smart man. Is he on the bills right now if he's stuck on Long Island?

Probably not. If he was playing Comac High School football for and I like Coach Reggio or Edward Bull. Last time you trashed other Comac coaches? That was one coach.

And I have not said that name. I actually like Coach Bull and I like Reggio and I also liked Fluger. Those are the three coaches I liked. And Coach Riggs and Samantha Perales' father I liked. But other than that, there was one coach. Samuel Perales.

One coach I did not like. Mr. D. Lawrence. Just hang on. Hold on. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Okay.

Anyway, without further ado, I'm not talking about Freddie Aldu. Let's end the show out in style with the closing bell. We'll tell you whose stock is booming and whose stock is dooming. Another day is in the books and we're taking stock of the sports world. It's time to find out who's up and who's down. Let's end the day right and hit the closing bell.

Only on the Zach Gelb Show. Alright, Gabe Davis. I've been telling you all show long, he's going to have 10 touchdowns at least this season, receiving the football. Gabe Davis off to a good start. Three receptions, 41 yards and a tutty.

Give Gabe Davis a stock up. Well, someone is showing up for the Rams and that's Cooper Cupp. Eight receptions already and a touchdown. He's their offense. Allen Robinson so far only one reception for 12 yards. Odell Beckham is at the game. And Ryan, Odell Beckham Jr. is tweeted away in the middle of the game. Do you know where he's sitting? Like he's not on the Rams sideline. What do you mean? Probably a luxury box.

Okay. He was on the field for the banner reveal. And I would imagine then you go enjoy some fancy food time in the luxury box. Maybe in the same luxury box as O.J. Simpson. O.J. is there. O.J.

is there. Roting out on his bills. In a luxury box O.J. nonetheless. Yeah. They should contain him to a one person luxury box.

Odell, at this game over roam with the motions. I don't know how to feel. Part of me wants to be out there.

And the other part of me is enjoying watching the benefits of the hard work these people put in. And then he tweeted after that. Cupp! After Cooper Cupp scored a touchdown. Anyway, though, Cooper Cupp give him a stock up. If you are a fantasy owner of Cam Akers.

Woof. He did not get on the field in the first quarter. And then he got two carries in the second quarter for a grand total of zero yards.

Hot take hickey. I know nobody cares about your fantasy team. Do you have Cam Akers on your fantasy team? I might.

Oh, what a shame. I might have him starting. I might need a touchdown badly here.

That's brutal on a Thursday. Guy has an 0-fer. And then woof. Vontay Davis retired at halftime. Can we fire a coach at halftime? Sean McVay, get him out.

The Cam Akers in the field. Remember the LaShawn? I forget who it was. LaShawn McCoy was a Trudavious wife.

Yes. When they were talking about Vontay, he goes, he just walked up to me. And they were doing the high pitch voice of Vontay Davis. And it was, I'm done. I'm done coach. I've had enough. My career is over. I'm done. I can't play this game anymore. Everything is too quick. I'm done.

That is one of the all time great audio clips. But if you are a fantasy owner of Cam Akers. Woof. Stock down. Turnovers. It's been sloppy. Three interceptions so far in this game and a fumble.

I've only seen 30 minutes of football. Stock down to the turnovers. And finally, I read today that McCaffrey was on the injury report. And it was because of a shin injury.

Now I read that and I said, oof, that wasn't good. And then you find out he was a full participant in practice. Now Matt Rule provided clarity. I read this online that he said McCaffrey got a small cut from a cleat.

But did continue to participate in practice for the full entirety of it. Now, didn't the same thing happen with Dak Prescott pretty much? What's going on with this cleat and Dak Prescott? His shoes are uncomfortable and it aggravated his surgically repaired ankle. And he is saying that that soreness, not a big deal, came from the shoes. So he was also on the injury report for ankle soreness that is from his shoes. I'm giving a stock down to these cleats.

Run CMC probably getting a cut from one of them. And then Dak getting some soreness. Geez. Alrighty, this is Zach Gelb showing CBS Sports Radio.

That is your closing bell. Big thanks to Fauzi Whitaker for joining us today. We'll be back for Football Friday tomorrow at 6 p.m. Eastern, 3 Pacific. Scott Hansen, Red Zone going to join us, the preeminent Red Zone host in the country.

Siciliano, take a seat. And we will also reveal who will be our guest picker this year as it goes head to head up against me in picks. I will put that out on Twitter at about 11 a.m. tomorrow, maybe even earlier than that. Hickey, have a good one. Each and every one of you will be back tomorrow. Catch me on WFNZ tomorrow at 9.20 a.m. and also the DA show as well. Peace!