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The Ultimate Father-Son Chat - Proverbs 4:1-9

Wisdom for the Heart / Dr. Steven Davey
The Truth Network Radio
May 26, 2020 1:00 am

The Ultimate Father-Son Chat - Proverbs 4:1-9

Wisdom for the Heart / Dr. Steven Davey

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May 26, 2020 1:00 am

God doesn't gauge your parental success on how well your kids do in school or how often they attend church or how well they're taken care of. His standard is very different. So join Stephen now to evaluate yourself according to God's Word.

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The principle of spiritual imitation requires modeling is one thing the lecture about the truth.

It's another thing to live out the true inner children really don't care if we delineate the truth that we have no desire whatsoever to demonstrate this is where every parents here. This is where it's hard right because we know are not perfect. There are times when we do not model of the truth but listen is in these moments when were not perfect and when we blow it that we actually have an opportunity to demonstrate confession tomorrow. Ohio asked the Lord for forgiveness. God doesn't gauge your parental successes on how well your kids doing school or how often they attend church's standard is very different.

God wants you to teach your children, his wisdom, I think we'd all agree that we want our children to be wise, and that helping children gain wisdom is the job of parents and grandparents, but in the busyness of everyday life. Things like haircuts and have times seem to dominate our conversations.

King Solomon was committed to helping his son be wise, Stephen, David will teach you about Solomon's perspective today on wisdom for the heart. Several years ago I came across an unusual story of a man named Larry Walters. It is an unusual story about this man and his famous chair. I thought of him when I began to study this particular text to see why the minute it seems that Larry had a lifelong dream to fly when he graduated from high school he joined the Air Force in hopes of becoming a pilot about his poor eyesight ended that particular dream when he left the service. He enjoyed sitting out in his lawn chair watching the fighter jets that crisscross the skies over backyard.

One day Larry Walters got an idea. With the help of his girlfriend lately bought some helium tanks in weather balloons from a local Army Navy surplus store. They told the storeowner there going to be using a commercial shoot by his company, they fill the balloons which they tied to his lawn chair and climbed in the launcher with some sandwiches and drinks and his trusty BB gun launcher was anchored by a rope to the number of his Jeep's plan was to release the rope hover two or 300 feet in the air and pop a few of the balloons with his BB gun. When it was time to settle back down to the planet lawn chair Larry as he was about to become known around the world cut his robe on July 2, 1982, but he didn't float lazily up a shot upward, as if fired from a cannon and he didn't climb a couple hundred feet. He leveled off at 16,000 feet if you can imagine it, 3 miles high didn't know what to do. It was afraid to shoot any of the balloons because it might cause an imbalance of calls about his lawn chair so he just behind on. He finally drifted from San Pedro, California into the approach corridor for the Los Angeles international Airport pilot radio the tower about passing a dialogue for a rescue pilot helicopter was dispatched but every time I got near of the current wind pushed them dangerously away. Larry finally got the nerve shot one balloon and then another and another and he slowly descended into the balloons got caught in a powerline causing a neighborhood in Long Beach to experience a blackout. He was however able to climb down whereupon he was immediately arrested.

Imagine that final indignity. He was put under arrest. They charged it with and I quote for operating an aircraft without an airworthiness certificate get this.

They also charged for not maintaining contact with air traffic as he was being led away by LAPD reporter asked K why did Blair responded well a man can't just sit around the great will obviously he should've set around a little longer. He should've thought about it a little more clearly maybe experimented first that I couldn't help think of parenting is a lot like Larry's flight in space. No time to experiment you arrived at the hospital just in time before you're really ready to get out of there hardly repaired their moving you out insurance only covers 48 hours and we need the room, you barely have time now to recover from the shock of it all before they send you home and then they charge you write for everything they charge you for using the mirror everything imaginable. All those people that went into that delivery room remember seeing them. They did that so they can bill you later.

You have no idea what they did and then you have just enough time to hardly unpack in your home but you have everything ready at home. Don't baby bed, dresser, little nighties in the pajamas with 40s and baby lotion all their plastic tub for bathing. Maybe.

Maybe most of this furniture is on loan from friends or family except for Carsey before you know it you are airborne, your ear, your in-flight and frankly you're going higher and and faster than you planned or imagine some moments are exhilarating and most of the time it's absolutely exhausting. Maybe you remember how well-meaning friends came by to drop off a book or give you some advice on personality development of three-month-olds and how you better not mess it. You are so afraid. What you he soon discovered that there may be a formula you can feed them, but there is no formula to raise that it takes your breath away that for young parents to tell you is an older parent about the time you figured out the basics of parenting. The ride is over and you're under arrest by major and empty Nestor those of your grandparents. Maybe you're flying in new territory now for the first time.actually has a lot to say about things that really matter, so I want to do is to together with you to explore what the Proverbs have to say to parents talk about what God seems to be concerned about, and it is much more than food schedules and percentage points things that matter asked the average father today of a middle school or or a highschooler if he has had to talk and no sale. You mean the talk yeah have you had the talk. Yes, the average father with the talk is about in José. Well, it's about the birds and bees right now so wrong to have that talk in fact, Solomon spent quite a bit of time talking about the dangers of being involved immorally with so many are not married to. What I find fascinating is that while most fathers who would argue that they must have the talk with her sons about sexual matters will never talk to them about Scripture or the character of God or eternal life or doctrinal matters that are troubling like election or challenging like eternal security or grace or spiritual gifts were given what the church needs and families need is for parents to communicate to their children. Issues of character and values and priority in submission to God and honesty and on and on and on. And frankly, God knew that we as parents would be all phone so he is giving us material to prime the pump turned Proverbs chapter 4 look at a few verses in what will just call the ultimate father-son chat. Let me divide our study into two principles that make up a wise session of rental counsel.

The first principle is the principle of spiritual edification and the objective of this principle is to simply tell them the truth.

Notice what Solomon writes in verse one of chapter 4 hero sons. The instruction of a father by the way, this is the first and only place in this book were you hear the word sign in plural form since the chapter will refer back into the singular. It seems that Solomon is making sure first of all, this is material for every son, probably in general.

Every child.

Another thing to keep in mind is that all of the father is mentioned in this text. Both parents and you picked that up in the book of Proverbs are responsible for teaching that Solomon will write in chapter 1 verse eight here, my son, your father's instruction and do not forsake your mother's. It is clear that the teaching of both father and mother are instructive and necessary in the development of the child. However, it seems that the spirit of God is focusing the lens of inspired Scripture here, at this point in chapter 4 on the father. These are issues the father must communicate to the sun for their own development. This is the truth about what God says.

Teach him he will say this instruction. This give attention that you may gain understanding this is this is about God. This is about God's word build them up in the faith. He begins by delivering the truck in any speaks categorically back, set up and he just uses words like instruction uses the word wall of the Hebrew word is Torah. This is the first five books of the Old Testament delivered to them the truth of God. This is Paul's desire toward his children in the faith. When he reminded them in Ephesians 4 to speak the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into him who is the head, even Christ, causing the growth of the body for the edification or the building up of itself in love. She Solomon is basing his father-son chat with Rehoboam on the delivery of the truth in love, but in verse two, he says, for I give you sound teaching do not abandon my instruction.

Now you can easily look at that and say Stephen the way the second this text is a command that the child should listen to the father wire you turn this thing around deal with the father. Well, it implies that the father has something to deliver for the child to listen to instruction means the father is to deliver instruction for the child to learn the law of God.

It means the father knows the law of God. The word here for Torah is instructive. It is delivered to them all the principles and precepts of God. Certainly those that would apply in this dispensation of grace, but all Scripture is profitable, take them through it. Encourage them to learn all of the word of God.

This is the principle of spiritual edification affect its expanded in Deuteronomy 6 were Moses records not familiar text. You shall teach them. That is, these truths diligently to your sons you shall talk of them when you sit in your house when you walk by the way, when you lie down know when you rise up.

Wonderful text. We we build up, and we strengthen our children when we make the word of God. A common theme is not necessarily an event that occurs at 6:30 AM or 9 PM. He's talking here about a lifestyle he's referring to talking sitting when you said when you when you lie down and take a nap when you get up when you're in the fishing boat is in the Hebrew text. You look closely, there to find the truth is your your children have questions about spiritual things and they will come up with them at times when you can't put them in your calendar when you might not even be fully prepared. Someone in our church them is a brand-new questions from kids I'm seeing these, but they perfectly illustrated what just might come up if were alert and ready, and maybe even provoke our children to talk about the Lord. If these elementary school kids were given the opportunity to ask God one question. Here's what they asked dear God. Neil writes I went to this wedding and they kiss right in church. Is that okay God would answer only for weddings right dear God. In Bible times did they really talk that Robert Craig dear God, I am an American, what are you dear God Jane asked. Instead of letting people die and having to make new ones. Why don't you just keep the ones you got now some of them didn't have questions but they had something they wanted to say of these particular kids like Jonathan who wrote dear God, if you let the dinosaur not extinct. We would not have a country you did the right thing to see that intense kid. You did the right thing.

Nan wrote I bet it is very hard for you to love all of everybody in the whole world. There are four people in my family. I can't do it. Joyce writes he must've felt the same way could she wrote dear God, thank you for my baby brother. What I pray for was puppy Elliott wrote dear God, I think sometimes even when I'm not praying that I wanted is a read that if Elliott's mom or dad had any idea. There are times when Elliott thinks about God, who will guide his thoughts. Who answers questions why is it the mom's bedtime reading great time for dads to get involved, connect, you never know what you hear in those unguarded moments spiritual truth can be reiterated profound meaning that leads me to the second thought of wise counsel for parents.

It's the principle of spiritual invitation that the first principle of spiritual edification requires mentoring the principle of spiritual invitation requires modeling is one thing the lecture about the truth.

It's another thing to live out the truth and our children really don't care if we delineate the truth and we have no desire whatsoever to demonstrate this is where every parents here gets intimidated. This is where it gets hard right because we know are not perfect.

There are times when we do not model of the truth. But listen, it's at these moments when were not perfect and when we blow it that we actually have an opportunity to demonstrate confession to model how to ask the Lord for forgiveness and them as well knows what Sullivan writes in verse three as it relates to modeling when I was a son to my father which Rehoboam is your grandfather David. Then he taught me and he said to me, verse four. Let your heart hold fast my words, keep my commandments and live Solomon is doing two things here at least first, he is reinforcing his advice with the past. He says listen Rehoboam when I was a son like you. I heard the same thing from your grandfather, my father and that's all right to say. If you have that kind of heritage. That's a wonderful thing to bring into the discussion.

Maybe for some of you.

You're starting to heritage with your family go for one day you'll be able to pass it on, perhaps to the next generation. That's what he's doing here. He is reinforcing his advice with his heritage the past. He saying listen Rehoboam when I was a son like you. I heard the same thing that sound a lot like when I was a boy and don't you remember how you felt when you heard your dad say that though not again when I was a boy, let me tell you I used to walk 3 miles to a one-room schoolhouse in the snow so stop complaining about the bus ride 630 in the morning and be grateful for the lunch you have don't waste it. Why, when I was a boy.

I took my lunch that one-room schoolhouse and all was was one real potato most of the farm boys did the same thing. We put the potatoes big black wood burning stove so that by lunchtime.

It would be cooked through and then my mom would give me a little pat of butter. I put it on the potato that be my lunch on the lead that my dad did he did. That's his story.

That's his story he told me he and the other farm boys in Minnesota literally walk through the snow to one-room schoolhouse with a raw potato that you complain about not having butterscotch pudding in your lunchbox after that story he said yes. I didn't course, all was boys with you that were you barefoot no know I had winter boots. How do you complain when you hear stories of your grandfather arriving in Minnesota covered wagon and difficulties that they had in life, but those are actually encouraging the depressing. Something powerful about a heritage that passes on to us the contexts of gratitude and grace and encourage and grits and ends in determination and honest work and am speaking the truth when when a man's handshake meant something we need to pass that along. There's something strengthening about that, don't hesitate tell your children stories about her childhood yes no think yours are as strange as I thought my dad let them know how you struggled maybe felt out of place. Tell them how to word the law of God intersected your life. Listen, is the ultimate father son ship. Tell your children, how and when you accepted Christ ever told him way more important than the birds and bees, Solomon is saying that letting back the tape so to speak. When I was a boy I listen to this instruction from your grandfather David who attempted to model what he didn't do it perfectly. He didn't progressively now giving you this this treasure. This is the truth of God's word and Rehoboam I want you to know that it mattered back to grandfather and it matters today with your father and matter to you now in one day. Solomon not only reinforces his advice with the past. Secondly, he identifies with his son in the present. Notice again when I was a son to my father tender. The only son in the sight of my mother was evening when I was a tender son with the Hebrew text could be translated when I was pliable when I was impressionable when I was weak. Solomon is basically saying I know what it's like to be on whether you can imagine it or not. I know how you feel and listen. Just as your grandfather told me know. I'm passing it along to you. Verse five acquire wisdom go after it. Now don't wait till till things begin to harden when you're tender when you're impressionable when when you're we go after understanding verse five. The middle part. Do not forget North turn away from the words of my mouth. Do not forsake her wisdom. She will guard you love her and she will watch over Jen with his father's.

I stayed alive say get a haircut get a job. Get your own car, get to work, get an education company. Say hello all that's great, but it's wisdom you got that.

That's what matters.

Nothing matters quite so much as this hidden treasure was listen. Ladies and gentlemen, you know it's true you can be an educated fool you can be highly paid and miserable. You can have a closet full of clothes be the most likely to succeed and be filled with yourself, get wisdom first and foremost noted verse eight prize her and she will exalt you.

She will honor you if you embrace her notice she will place on your head. A garland of grace. She will present you with the crown of beauty. So in a parent-child conversation it goes sweetheart.

Let me tell you what real beauty is all about. Let me tell you with winsome when will draw people to you.

Somebody tell you what will make you handsome me tell you what you really ought where what will make you stand up and stand out and has nothing to do with what you look it has nothing to do with the label on your shirt, and has everything to do with who you are and beyond that who you know and who you serve. This is the stuff that last wisdom delivers that he is saying grace and beauty in the context of this paragraph. These are not physical attributes.

They are the fruit of wisdom in the inner attitude and spirit.

Have a good father-son chat.

Well, for starters, it's not a one-time event. It's often in life and it just happened. How blessed are the children whose parents care deeply about the hidden treasure wisdom and communicate to the next generation with this principle of edification to build up in this principle of invitation to show them how Charlie Shedd happens to be one of those fathers that I envy I'll just he wasn't wonderful father and he wrote everything down. He would write letters to his son to save them for later in life, and some could read if you wrote down these became books. In fact letters to Philip promises to Peter, let me let me read you one of his original promises. He told of this event I he said my son and I were out in the country for a ride. It was evening and when you know we ran. I guess we were walking along after we had been to a nearby farmhouse and I was carrying a can of gasoline returning to our car to get it going again. Philip was only four years old at the time he was playing along. He was throwing rocks, telephone poles, picking flowers and then all of a sudden it got dark Knight just came all at once. Philip ran over and put his little hand in mine, take my hand. I like later on.

Charlie Shedd would write son.

There is a hand reaching to you from the heart.

If you will lay your hand in his hand.

The hand of God, and walk with you will never ever get great advice with lasting encouragement. This is the truth that our children and our grandchildren must hear from our lips. This is what they must see mottled with our lives. Now it might not change a child's life. I don't but I do know it will change yours parents, grandparents really anyone with the child in your life. You likely have some goals for that child you want them to be obedient and respectful.

You want them to do their best in school. All of those are important. The lesson for us today from God's word is that in the midst of everything were teaching children. We must help them understand God's wisdom you're listening to wisdom for the heart with Stephen Devi, Stephen first delivered this message to the church he pastors in Cary, North Carolina. I want you to be aware that we've taken this lesson and turned it into a booklet because this is such a practical resource for parents. We wanted to have it available in a convenient and easy to share format this lesson and that booklet is entitled, the ultimate father-son chat.

You'll find this booklet in the resource section of our website, but you can also call us for information on how you can get a copy. Call us in the office right now at 86 648 Bible.

That's 866-482-4253. I want to encourage you to install the wisdom for the heart Almost 35,000 people have that installed on their phone and Dave listen to one of our lessons over a million times. It's a great way to take Bible teaching where ever you go and you'll find it in either the iTunes or the Google play scores.

It's free to download and free to use and I think you'll be glad to have it on your phone or tablet brought a time for today. But thanks for listening were glad you joined us. Join us again tomorrow for another lesson from Proverbs right here on wisdom


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