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We Two Are One (Part 2 of 2)

Truth for Life / Alistair Begg
The Truth Network Radio
June 9, 2022 4:00 am

We Two Are One (Part 2 of 2)

Truth for Life / Alistair Begg

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June 9, 2022 4:00 am

Have you heard the term “married singles”? It refers to when couples drift so far apart that only legal bonds connect them. Find out why that’s unbiblical, and learn how to prevent it from happening in your marriage. Listen to Truth For Life with Alistair Begg.


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The giver heard the term single describes what happens when couples drift so far apart that the only thing connecting members a legal bond today on Truth for Life will find out why this practice of being a married single is on biblical and how to keep it from happening in our marriages Alastair biggest teaching from first Corinthians chapter 7 were in verses one through seven, and that is why the wife to take her on husband's observation and that's one weather qualification endorsed to and then he deals with his obligation and vastly the obligations which are unique to the marital status, the husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife and likewise the wife to her husband. Not a very practical implications of this are many. Let me quote you somebody else is always easier to quote that I can get blamed for the quote. This is our priority said at the practical level. This is a very challenging word to all Christian couples. Many reasons are given for withholding. What is Jew to the other tiredness, resentment, disinterest, boredom, etc. for Corinthian husbands, so wedded to their own rights. This very act the instruction must've been something of a body blow, and it is something of a body blow to all husbands, whether they live in Corinth but in Cleveland it is sadly vital to add to this for the nurse and are currently increasingly perverted culture that there are's for gives no basis to violate our marriage partners walk with Christ in purity and in wholeness on account of the fact that we now on a 50% share in their body. So if any of us are tempted to use verse four as leverage over our spouse to bring them into submission to something that we've decided his right would better be very very careful. The wife's body does not belong to her along, but also to her husband in the same way. The husband's body does not belong to him along but also to his wife two has now become one and as one under Christ. They must still fulfill the divine mandates for purity and lifestyle. Then we go diversify discus pattern.

Okay observation is okay. It's good to be single qualification. There's a lot of stuff going on, you'd be better to be married. Once you get married you got an obligation.

I want to explain why you have the obligation, and then he says because you have the obligation I want to give you no basis for deprivation verse five. Do not deprive each other. Okay this is a command. The verse opens with a command sexual expression within marriage is not an option or an extra is not something that can be offered by one spouse to the other as a kind of feather in the how does it work while you been very good. So therefore that's fine you been good so well that's good are you been bad so therefore that's not but no, that's not what it is.

There is to be no deprivation sexual fulfillment within marriage is at the very heart of what God intends because it expresses the bond which is to permanently exist between a husband and a wife. God's plan for marriage included neither divorce nor celibacy. Okay Genesis chapter 1 is an interesting question. I'm fully thought out and I probably shouldn't say this but do you think it would have been singleness without the fall of man in Genesis 3, God's plan as he made man and woman was neither for divorce nor for celibacy, but he qualifies himself once again, do not deprive each other. Do not use physical union within marriage as a means as a tool for providing encouragement or punishment or whatever might be if there is going to be a cessation of your relationship with one another. He says I want to tell you how it happens. First of all, it happens by mutual consent. One does not inform the other. Both agreed to. It happens for a limited time three. It happens for an express purpose and that is to devote yourselves to prayer our first Peter chapter 3 and verse seven. Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partners in the near as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers may think a lot about this week and I found it phenomenally challenging. But here's what I think. I think that God recognizes that there is a special power in the prayers of a married couple so special and so productive that he believes that married couples might come to the conviction that in the same way that we might remove ourselves from the realm of eating for a day or three or a week in order to give ourselves devotedly to seeking God's face for something so he says in the rush of life with so much that is going on with so much that would come in to deprive us of the opportunity of prayer.

He says there may well be times when by mutual consent. As you think.

Perhaps if you think of your children and you say Lord God, what will become of our children, then, is God knees beside the bed, rather than get in the by mutual consent for a limited time, and for an express purpose that is the only way that it can never happen. That is the only allowable time that you can shut down your sexual urges within marriage understand that it is not uncommon for me for us to hear people come and stay with no physical relationships with one another for seven months, nine months, 12 months, 18 months for what reason because the first Corinthians 7 verse five.

No, they didn't even know for spending 75 was in the Bible so it is a clear violation of the Bible where we going to do a force of over going to be the Bible but I don't feel like I don't care what you feel like it or not, since when did this become a glandular condition that's Hollywood I'm just trying to get the feeling again move that's Hollywood.

The Bible says you do it because you're supposed to is on very romantic doesn't, but that's what is all good as me. I was waiting for for something that you obviously you are now misleading. I know I didn't have well if you keep waiting. You won't be an old lady very long be an old man so let me give you some practical advice.

Do not do this except for these reasons the site together for a limited time for an express purpose and when you finish come together again fast so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control to ensure that neither we nor our marriage partners fall into temptation. We must resume relationships immediately. Now Matthew question is this practical is this helpful is is down where we live our lives. This is no pious claptrap.

This is absolutely dead on. This is the Bible. I'm excited we don't have to apologize to the world. They have made sex and disaster. They have no answers. We do that as Christian people, for the love of the same Jesus Christ, would we not then be a shining example to a sex crazed distorted world and not come with the same jolly notions that the whole world is coming to counselors with all the time, why, why would we ever believe that I was possible because the Holy Spirit lives within our lives because we are no longer what we were before we came to faith in Jesus Christ, whether single or married. We are made absolutely no we moved to verse six and he moves to his expectation. He says I say this not as a command, but as a concession is you mean by that.

It's a rhetorical question. I say this is a concession, not as a command. Kenneth Taylor in the living Bible helpfully paraphrases it in this way, I am not saying you must marry, but you certainly may.

If you wish. Okay, so he's not telling. Single people that they have to get married. He's telling them they may get married if they would like to and they must listen to the people who tell them that the only spiritual way to live your life is to live it in singleness. He is been laying down in these five or six verses the duties of all who are married, but he does not lay it down as a Judy that all should be married. Okay, these are the duties of those ones married, but it is not a Judy to be married because what he might wish to be the case and what he expects to be the case are obviously two different things.

The point he was making is simply this, that marriage is the God ordained institution for relationships between a man and a woman.

That's what the Bible says, from beginning to end. For relationships between a man and a woman apart from fraternal relationships within the family of brothers and sisters physical relationships. Anything that approaches that God is again, that marriage is a place for that to the right of the process that marriage is honorable in the marriage bed is undefiled.

It is perfectly fine. Incidentally, some people use that's in the marriage bed is undefiled to come up with the same nonsense that I mentioned earlier, so might as well just hit it again, but with his suspenders and and belt as well, and that is that they say since the marriage bed is undefiled. What that means is you can do anything you want in the marriage that no you can't.

You can only do within your marriage bed. What fits the propriety and the parameters of a physically pure life before Christ as an individual and as a married couple.

The only way the marriage bed is undefiled is if undefiled activity takes place within the marriage. Marriage is the God ordained institution for relationships between a man and a woman.

However, he says it is not required if you're single.

He says that's good. If you're married or if you get married and stay married. And while you're married. Don't deprive your spouse. Spirituality is not determined by marital status. Now he states his own preference. Verse seven. I wish that all men wear as I am, he tells us in verse eight that he was unmarried.

Therefore he saying in verse seven. I wish that everybody was unmarried like me now it is commonly held that Paul was celibate. All of his life. Have you ever thought of Paul as having a wife. Most people have I think about this a little bit this week and read about it is much as I could and this is what I found out.

Remember, Paul says in Philippians that he was absolutely up to the max in terms of Jewish orthodoxy that before his before he came to faith in Christ. He never missed a beat. He was dead on with what the requirements of the Jewish law were he was absolutely Orthodox. Let me tell you, the Jewish orthodoxy laid it down. That marriage was an obligation. Therefore, if Paul was completely Orthodox in his Judaism and as was common at that time he were to be married around the age of 18 then Saul of Tarsus was married once and furthermore, since he mentions in acts chapter 20 that he made a decision regarding the Christians as a member of the Sanhedrin Council you could not be a member of the Sanhedrin Council without actually being married, however, is not married now is unmarried.

So what happened while in heaven you can run right up to ask because tonight I can tell you the answer.

There are two options one his wife has died to as a result of his Damascus Road experience. His wife left him and thought about it, your thought of Paul wrote all the stuff you wrote about marriage and about singleness and about everything else in light of the fact that he himself was the product of a broken marriage that he had come to faith in Jesus Christ. And when he writes to the Corinthians is going to see a little bit later on he says if you come to faith in Jesus Christ and your marriage partner wanted anything to do with you anymore. He says either just let them go.

Maybe was writing theory maybe writing history maybe writing biography, however, is idle to speculate and I was little bit of idle speculation.

What we can say what we can say with certainty as we draw this to the close is that Paul would like others to be unmarried. Why is that because he expects that if they remain on married then will be just like him. The thing singleness different. Paul was it clarified his vision established these days. He knew exactly what he was about. He had on this one thing I do passion about his life. Philippians 314.

He said this one thing I do, forgetting what is behind, I press on, so I was very clear to Paul that, in his single state he was able to pursue this passion for the evangelization of the world in a way that he could never have done if he had the responsibilities of marriage. So he says I wish that you were all like me doesn't simply mean I wish that you were all unmarried but I wish that you were unmarried and possessed of the same zeal that I have. To see the world, one for Jesus Christ is very very important we understand that because singleness is held up as an expectation in our day, but seldom is it seen in light of the benefit that accrues for the sake of the kingdom of God.

However, having said that it's equally clear that his expectation is not that all who are single will remain single, nor that those who are married will introduce celibacy into their marriage as if it were in evidence of spirituality in the final sentence in verse seven acknowledges that both singleness and marriage are gifts from God when he says these menaces on gift from God.

One is the skiff and another that is not just talking about looking forward to force Corinthians 12 he speaking, especially in terms of married or single singleness is a gift. Marriage is a gift we should neither misuse the gifts we've been given. So if we had been given the gift of singleness, we should not abuse it. If we been given the gift of marriage we should not abuse it. We should not regard singleness is some second-class state it is. He says God's gift to a person and if it is a gift to the person, then it is important that he or she accepts it and exercises it did resemble Helen Rose beer, it is questionable whether Helen Rose beer his ministry would have been of the die mentions that it has been what are not for the fight that God gives her the gift of singleness. Take for example John start probably be most quoted clergyman from this pool but in the last nine years. John starts ministry is directly related to the fight and are given the gift of singleness 40 could never have been closeted away as he was no written as he's done nor travel the world as he has. If you have the responsibilities of marital relationships in children. Now I know that some of you want me to go on and discuss the individual who, in a single state finds themselves in during it, rather than enjoying it. Don't tell me, says the person that singleness is a gift from God.

I don't regard it as a gift.

I don't like it. And this is my birthday present. You can take it back okay well that's him that's another discussion but is not within the context of this year we have to say is that God sees singleness as a second-class state, but he gives singleness to certain individuals and he gives marriage to other individuals will say more about that in the weeks to come.

Suffice it to say that in these verses, Paul declares the place of both singleness and marriage. Both are evidences of God's grace to be experienced in sustained purely by the strength which God supplies. I can only but imagine that to live as a single in this world demands that God infuses you with strength to be able to live without violating his commands.

I would imagine that your state is a single I want to tell you that that is exactly my state is married.

It is only as God gives strength and grace and wisdom that I can live as a man with in the marriage bounces got into there are distinctions in what life means for us in the benefits we enjoy in the freedoms we experience both are gifts from God, but let me conclude with a word to Mr. Mrs. X Mr. Mrs. X Satan is a roaring lion, seeking people to devour by observation and by biblical record. He logs to attack marriages. He logs to quench our prayers. He loves to reduce the joys of sex to his own debased level. Therefore, as we seen so many times before the Christian life as it relates to marriage is not easy but it is straightforward and the parameters established in these verses may be difficult to apply, but they are easy to understand, therefore, in understanding them. Let's ask God for the grace to apply.

I don't like school away having to sing the sand laments of Karen Carpenter love Logan the tool by strangers in many ways, the tragic condition of married singles 1+1 = 1. Take your wife take your husband look into your eyes and tell me we to R1. Don't ever, ever forget. And no one, not even your kids are allowed to violate the nature of that relationship with her. We are married or single. We need God's grace and strength to live according to his listing to Truth for Life with Alastair Begg. Alastair returns in just a minute to close today's program know as Alastair explained today. Whether you been married for decades or just a few months. It can be easy to take your spouse for granted in his book, lasting love, Alastair takes a closer look at the actions or the neglect that can cause couples to drift apart until your living is married singles or worse when you read the book, lasting love, you'll learn how to nurture and protect your marriage like an expert gardener, Alastair encourages couples to pull the weeds of destruction looks brought up before they overwhelm the marriage. Things like holding on to past relationships, failing to appreciate one other or running the merry-go-round of daily schedules. You also learn how you can plant hedges of protection around your marriage.

Request your copy of the book lasting love.

When you donate to Truth for Life. You can click the image you see on our app or visit our while you're online there's another book. Alastair has written that is now available in our online store. It's his daily devotional titled Truth for Life 365 daily devotions. This is a hardcover book that uses Scripture as the source of each daily reflection the corresponding commentaries by Alastair point us to God's glory and his goodness as he reveals himself in his word again.

You'll find the daily devotional Truth for Life online truthful. Now here's Alastair close with prayer father I pray that out of the intense practicality of your word that you will make a student's. I certainly can get to the heart of all of this in this framework and I pray that it may just create a hunger in the hearts of each one of us to search the Scriptures to see if these things are sold to be like the church of Berea who examined the Scriptures every day to see if the things that were being told were really true.

Login is increasing. That kind of congregation that we may be men and women of the word come to our marriages. We pray, come to our singleness come to our hearts come to our loneliness, come to our fears come to our disinterestedness come to is Lord, we pray, make us different in this crazy world in which we live in the world may come to our doors ask a reason for the transforming power and whole that is within us. We thank you that you derive praise and glory to your name from the lips of men and women throughout every hour of the day and we thank you immensely for the privilege of being able to end our day in a chorus of praise and worship to you, the living God, for Jesus sake, we ask that I'm bopping. Thanks for listing today. Tomorrow will learn why we need to protect our marriages with the vigilance of our presidential bodyguard you been married six days or six decades Bible teaching of Alastair Begg is furnished by Truth for Life Learning is for Living

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